how do I teleport my wife to my home?

Use a Town Portal.

Use your magic tablet, known commonly as "cell phone." Touch the insignia for text messaging. Locate your wife's insignia, and type the magic command: "Bitch come home," then touch the insignia to send your spell.

>>19451121
knock her ass out. drag her home. then slap her awake. it will appear to her that she actually teleported instantly home.

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>>19451121
Not being a gentleman wizard and teleporting your home to your wife. I find your magical chivalry lacking.

>>19451151
What manner of sorcery be this!?

>>19451121
She just looks at a map, taps the icon for "Home", confirms "Yes", and after a brief time where she looks at a slowly rotating cart floating in the mist over a black background she'll be there.

It's not complicated.