Eclipse

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an eclipse?

same thing that happens on every other eclipse ever: nothing.

The Cali Mega Quake

*crosses fingers*

You'll get a bunch of stories of people who burned out their retinas. Nothing more than that.

>>19418272
The great America eclipse will touch the Californian faults,yellow stone and new Madrid
Muh...

Rich people incapable of the pleasures of the mind will rape and kill innocents in secret rituals around the world. Children will suffer for the sins of their elders.
Meanwhile, all the actual fun will be had by nerds, whose souls are mostly as clean and bright as their minds, for nerds never get too old to enjoy things like children.

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the great happenstance

>>19418272
The same thing that has happened in every recorded eclipse: fucking nothing

An electrical discharge between jupiter and the sun will happen and a focused aser beam from the eclipse will hit earth in a destruive way no humanity ever saw

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>>19418285
>No..

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An Aztec Priest will stop sacrificing humans for about 7 minutes to watch.

>>19418272
I know what I want NOT to happen: a cloudy day. I'm driving seven hours for two damn minutes; there better not be a cloud in the sky.

my friend might turn into a demon and rape my girlfriend

>>19418718
Fuck me, I never even considered that.

>>19418754
Keep checking forecasts, wherever you're going.

http://www.eclipse2017.org/2017/weather.htm

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>>19418272
Same thing as with the Mayan Apocalypse in 2012. Gullible rubes will build up their anticipation for weeks, to the verge of panic, then afterwards /x/ will be flooded with threads complaining that the promised happening didn't materialize. This despite repeatedly assuring the influx of nervous noobs that none of the literally thousands of these events has been the end yet, that the Bible explicitly says that date-setters are all bullshit artists.

>>19418272
Can't wait. It will be a great time to do magic...

I'll transform into a Gundam

>>19418272
A great jaguar will devour the sun... unless you or someone else sacrifices 21 virgins to Xenuhoctititpetal. Get on it.

>>19418272
It'll be dark out in the middle of the day. Should be pretty cool.

That's about it though.

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>>19418272
Trum unveils his Eclipse-class star dreadnaught and pic related for best Korea

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>>19420442

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Invocation of Doom

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>>19418272
A re-boot of the aryan hive mind.

>>19418272
The reign of men will decline just as the reign of the ancient ones.