The Moth

Branching off from this experience, I recalled a second time within recent history where I had purposefully gone out of my way merely to satisfy my own primal urges to enact violence upon another moth. As much as I strive to be unlike the others, it would be ever so contradictory to lie to myself saying I'm nothing like them. I was derived from them. All of us have churned endlessly in a meaty stew, comprised of, to little surprise, human flesh mixed with the herbs and necture of this planet, in a sense, forcing, or perhaps tricking ourselves, into believing the human body had importance hidden within the earthen crust. Importance that was either pre-destined to be ours, or meant only for those of a higher being.

If the first were to be true, its reasoning for being there must then be first of another, then ours and ours alone to keep. How else can one explain the complexity of how these diverse flavors meld together with one another to form rather flawless flavor and taste? Almost as if their newly woven intricities were formed with timely sculpted hands who's connecting inner circuitry was the result of either divine planning or divine mistakes. Both of which to me sound terrifying. Terrifying in the sense that both actions are to my almost certain contemplation, coupled with inept ability to intuitively, or more preferred, creatively, see what I've been shown and taught as this known cosmos to not be that of black or that of white or even that of grey, but instead that of all known and unknown colors and complexion. Both not only feasible and reasonable, but also unreasonable and unfeasible. Situations that could both explain or give meaning to this existence we dwell within for possible eternity.

If the second were to be true, then we have either doomed ourselves temporarily, we can only hope, or we have been given a special opportunity in which we are able to better ourselves. "we" being physical, as well as "we" being spiritual, both at once, as well as individually, in the sense of how each human being must not only endure the roller coaster of emotions this physical world undoubtedly demonstrates, but also must go about doing so with the only "true" sense of clarity being themselves, unknown whether those around us which science and religion have shown me to be surprisingly reliable in regards to oneself with the worldwide acceptance of internal biology and spiritual essence, which can only ever so beg the question of whether or not I personally find solitude in who I know I am, but even more so, whether or not those who surround me have or are even capable of doing what I have done ever so proudly. I feel obligated, in a sense, to bring them with me. Yet, even in thoughts of attempt I find myself gravitating towards the idea that perhaps it truly isn't my place to pick and choose those among me whom I felt deserved the same enlightenment of essence, if not solely based on my acknowledgements of how heavily emotions weigh down upon clear judgement, in turn, dirtying not it's "purity" but it's originality of its initial perception, partially as well.

Although unconfirmed to whether or not involving emotion is preferable for our eventual combined enlightenment is or is not to come, is not something that concerns me, nor do I find it to be worried upon since uncertainty, given my up to date concurrency in this physical, is the seed not of fear, but of all emotional outlets. Emotion stems from emotion, in turn, causing a chain reaction of emotion which either clears or tarnishes our initial purity of our decisions. What I have come to know and understand from experiencing the many different levels, alterations, and mixtures of mood and haunting thought, is no longer something I strive towards trying to understand any further, knowing, that I have already proven my worth and efficiency with not necessarily controlling, but more so understanding and learning first hand how they may very well be a root, or entire trunk of giant tree that in my eyes could flourish with petals of rose all the while wicked roots flourish through mother earth's rocky vessel. Yet all I want to do is understand them. It is not my place to control these emotions, because attempting to make them your slaves will only ever lead them to despise and resent you, just as is seen in the world of today and now, is also seen with the todays and nows of past. Then again, I am fully aware that this view is unfair to myself and unfair to those who surround me. Who am I to say? I am no one.

Although I desire to be everyone and everything. I am no better than emotion than emotion is no better in regards to mind. Neither should be related in a fashion of rivalry, because rivalry will in turn become chivalry, and why must we all take one massive step backwards into what we've deceitfully told ourselves time and time again is primitive in nature. Clubs and sticks have become bullets and bombs, and from my perspective they end up being used for the same things, decades upon centuries upon millenia apart, maybe not as often or as frequent or for what we personally believe them to be needed for or how their usefulness has lied to us, presenting itself as "useful", but more so in a way I feel is a shallow escuse and hindrance towards not just the human's evolution of body or mind or both or neither, but a hindrance to myself, whom with no intentions of malice or conceding intentions being consistently involved in my personal decision making process, consistently not in the sense of actual realistic logical human bred consistency, only in sense that although not fully conquered, will in fact be conquered in time, and muck faster than those around me simply because I feel it to be true. Am I allowed the pleasure of using such words that tie in with and evoke emotion? Unlike so many who wear emotion on their sleeves, I want to say I have found a way to wear them both underneath while also presenting. But can this not be said about every human being? How can we be fully aware of their perpetual importance when we arent even fully aware of our own perpetual importance and appearance upon ourselves.

I have taken a step forward into the unknown and continue to step without hesitation. I've earned not my full right as a component of true meaning, I've only earned the respect of those before, present, and after whom also were capable of not only finding the silver lining I wish to believe I have found. With their respect, so to will their acknowledgement towards me grow as I sculpt my being into something I can truly be proud of. I refuse to go out of my way and into theirs. Yet I know that I must if I am to accomplish anything of value. Make of it whatever emotional attachment you are so fond of giving, knowing that emotion still has incredible significance and power is something I am not only aware of, but something i attempt to apply rigorously with the full intent to first and foremost, benefit all mankind and all life, and secondly, benefit myself. I hold your importance above mine, and come the day you too are able to do so genuinely, respectfully, mindfully, and whole-heartedly, subtracting and adding the thoughts of what is considered "right" and "wrong" can we move forward. Right and Wrong. Two words I no longer allow myself to cast upon surface be it with ink or with lead or even diamond tipped quill, yet i find myself doing time and time again. If we could master our spirits, then I truly believe you and I will have made necissary progression of self. I consider it nothing less than a distasteful service to the more important goal in mind for me to hold your hand along the way as it would be for you to hold my hand. Yet we must do so. How else can we ascend the steps to heaven? I want to believe my time is on the horizon reaching towards the zenith of the sun. And whether the sun be set or moon be cast makes no difference to me.

I expect to one day meditate within the suns viscous heat as do I expect to walk along the frigid coldness of the moon's bone like in appearance surface and look upon not just the tiny home we once new as earth, but the entirety of everything we didn't and couldn't have ever known from the close familiar of Orien's Belt to the belts worn by the brothers and sisters and mothers and fathers strewn and spun in what seems to be a meticulous, intrinsic pattern throughout the known and unknown universe, along with everything in and between.

Who am I to take the life of a moth? Who am I not to? And who are you, when all I know to be true is myself? It is not fair.

/End.

What is the point, OP?

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JG6x4MHdTWM

I would just like to add in this thread, with my post, that I really, really, really like this thread, and the posts in them including this post, but that's only because I like my own posts equally as much as the posts of everyone.

>>19136294
I'm not OP, but I do have some thing I want to share about the question you asked,

>What is the point, OP?

I think the answer is pretty obvious. You are! The point, is what I meant, generally speaking.

Bump

Council of 5

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>>19137783
Baby, I’m a four alarm fire
And I’m what you desire
Like a siren in the night
(Going nino, nino!)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d1pKffS6FXA

>>19136294
Vengeance

>>19137783
I'm still trying to figure out who they are, I know you have been hinting at this summer. Key here.

>>19137964
Who they are indeed...
>Ask Revanah

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>>19137964
It's a story only Revanah would tell you about.