I want to become the Devil. How do I do this?

Ok

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>>18841197
I guess in the far future, it could be a counsel or a large group, or even all of humanity, that gets to be judge and jury to all the evil sinners who have ever lived. I just want Hell to be real so badly. Of course I don't believe in religion or magics, but I think that in the far future, we may be able to master time and space, open dimensions and parallel universes and alternate time lines, but the most important reason for all that to exist is to make a real Hell for all the Christians that have ever lived. We will get to see the group of Christians condemning that one person who said they don't believe in fairy tales, how those Christians mocked and beat the intelligent persons, all the people that were murdered for religion. We get to show them with the time-viewer the history of the Earth and they were wrong, then we get to make those Christians pay, cutting off their hands, over and over and over. Doesn't matter if it is a simulation, or real their exact brain replicated, they need to suffer for eternity, I believe it will be possible and it is our duty to achieve that goal one day.

dude did you know there is a Satanic Bible? aint that nuts, maybe go pick one up and give it a read.

>>18841227

You could create the Roko's Basilisk, but it would still punish you because that is what it does.

>>18841640
anton LaVey was an atheist

>>18841640
>>18841659

Yup. LaVeyan satanism is philosophy.

OP, looking for a reason to treat people like garbage is a sign that you are made of garbage. You'd be sentenced to your own hell if it was a genuinely just place. Actually, if it was a genuinely just place, it wouldn't exist because non-existence is both the ultimate reward and punishment.

>>18841781

Actually, if you think about it would be possible.

Let's imagine they created artifical life that could just use whatever mater it got its hands on for computational power (like having a human mind that is immortal with the ability to think about a problem for 20,000 years in a weeks span times a trillion since its the size of a galaxy).

Let's just say for a moment such a being existed (it's not scientifically impossible if technology improves) and for whatever reason this being got pissed off and decided not only to torture the sentient beings it could gets its hands on its current time frame, but decided to create a galactic wide LHC to reverse the 2nd law of thermo dynamics and capture sentient beings on their point of death and make them immortal and torture them for eternity too.

Not content with this, its decides to create inter-dimensional travel to torture all sentient life in all dimensions.

Unlike Abrhamic Gods this one is possible.

The devil doesn't send anyone to hell he's a prisoner of hell as much as anyone there

>>18841012
You have to be 18 to use this site

>>18841012
>I want to become the Devil. How do I do this?

just call yourself trans-satan and demand that people take you seriously on pain of being called bigots. tell them your pronouns are lucifer and iblis

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>>18841012
>Looking back in history, there are so many bad people who have lived and never paid for their crimes.
how would you know though? maybe they actually went to hell.

>hunt down every criminal.
well technically anybody who breaks a law is a criminal. what about people who broke the law because it was an unjust law? or do you believe the law is always right? and if you think the law is always right, how can you be the devil?

you don't sound like you want to be the devil, you sound like you want to be batman. get off /x/, start lifting, get a costume, and go fight crime.

>>18841985

Except Batman knows what he's doing in the good adaptations.

>>18841666
nice trips

>>18841012

eat an entire cucumber and then throw it up in someones face, that should a great punishment for any evildoer

>>18841903
He has the choice of one person

Don't know if that still stands

*Fedora tipping intensifies*

>>18841012
While I do beleive there is a place in this great cosmos for everyone, this might not be yours.
just for future reference, some of your ideas I dont agree with for your apprenticeship.
>make a great devil
doing it badly would suffice, no need for over acheivement here
>god-like powers
NO, absolutely not.
>ignorant people
again no, ignorance can be bliss
>view the past?
clairvoyance, have you given this alot of thought or is it just a whim?
> A new dimension for them to pay for thousands and millions of years.
we are living that now

being judge and jury sounds like you just want to play god for a while, not be shaytan

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>>18841985
>how would you know though? maybe they actually went to hell.

That is what the portal time machine viewer is for, with your godlike powers, you can view on tv an entire persons life with a remote control, it would show you their thoughts, and every single consequence of a persons action. Or you would use your power to split up into two, and one of you would be like a ghost to follow the person would from birth until death. Watching and judging every action. That sin would be exposed to all humans who were effected by the evil sinner - in the afterlife.
Surely there are people who live good lives and don't deserve hell. They will be invited to Tomorrow-Land, a high technology society where they get their human bodies with dna and gene corrected so they can be healthy and live 100x longer. All the scientists and smart people in history would be invited here. I can only surmise that evil people with secrets of the most heinous sins would be opposed to these goals.

I want to become Elvis Presley. How do I Elvis?

You can start by registering Democrat. Then start practicing spreading pain and suffering to all you know. Enjoy burning in Hell with 10,000 other stupid people who think torturing people represents power.

>>18844377
Don't you have some loving father to deport?