Dolphin thread

your first sentence doesn't necessarily negate the second.

- friendly dolphin

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>>18618252

We're completely innocent creatures Goyim; nothing to worry about.

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No seriously, does the government know more than it's telling us? Is there a covert human-dolphin hybrid chimera super soldier program operating in the shadows?

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>>18618252
If dolphins are so smart why haven't they discovered fire or invented the wheel yet?

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>>18618252

>>18618425
That plan is all wet.

>>18618425
But they HAVE created "wheels."

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UkmfmosZONc

Lacking hands, and an environment that allows fire to be created, it is clear that dolphin tech will be hydro and sonar based. We need to stop them now before they can come up with something to attack us with using these burgeoning advancements.

>>18618252
There's only 1 sentence.

>>18618252
John Lilly thought so

>>18618252
FINALLY. One of these threads. I made one of these months ago and some shithead mod deleted it. I detailed my experiences with these amazing creatures and it all got deleted. It was really disheartening.

But yes. They absolutely ARE telepathic, psychic, mystical whatever you want to call. There is so much more to cetaceans that meets the eye. They are millions of years more evolves than we are. God only knows what their brains really comprehend.

I have personally experienced what I would call psychic or telepathic communication. It's not always in words. They can communicate to you an entire scene in images and words like a vision. I swear it's the truth. If you want to have this gift you need only try it for yourself stop thinking of these being as lesser than you and as our equal and even more so as a teacher to mankind.

If not then continue on being as you are. But you will be turning down something great.

>>18620549
Flipper hates you.

>>18620563
Flipper is dead, you idiot. She killed herself.

>>18620633
It's a hate from beyond the grave.

>>18620636
More like you're just a bitter asshole who can't understand what I'm trying to say. That's okay though. I realize there's going to be people like you. Still doesn't change the fact that I talk to dolphins and that I've swam with them and it was the most magical thing you could imagine. Seriously. Swimming with wild dolphins and one dives under you and leaps right in front of you. And just a few days before you had a vision of the same exact thing? What are the odds?

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>>18620657

>>18620657
Is your name by any chance Malcolm Brenner?

>>18620659
wow I feel so sorry for that poor dolphin that was forced to be trained to hump idiot tourists. This is why marine parks needs to be shut down.

>>18620665
Uhhhh no? Who the fuck is that?

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>>18620665
>Malcolm Brenner

googled name, wish I hadn't
thanks a lot anon!

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>>18620657

>>18620675
yeah no definitely not that guy since I'm female. But maybe that's one of you anons since that's where your minds are at.

>>18620671
A dude who became famous for his "relationship" with a dolphin

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>>18620680
Me on the right

>>18620680
If you're female, are you Margaret Howe?

If you want to know about dolphin intelligence, look into a guy named Timothy Wyllie. Ill post a video of him detailing his encounter with a pod of dolphins in the early 80's while he was High as fucking shit on PCP while it happened. He is my spirit animal. I want the guy to teach me how to commune with dolphins before he dies cuz he's old as fuck right now and still doing PCP by the bucket.

heres an interview where he goes into into it
skip ahead go around 2:30, but the whole interview is pretty wild. In the actual episode it goes to Timothy crackin out lines of PCP and snorting it off a mirror.

>>18620777
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ehUKmZjlZOY

forgot the link

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>>18620777
>If you want to know about dolphin intelligence
>encounter with a pod of dolphins... while he was High as fucking shit on PCP

Dolphin WOULD be smarter than a person on PCP, like Duh.

>>18620777
If I was high as fuck on PCP, I think I too would be able to communicate with any animal or mythological being

>>18620791
dude, it doesnt stop there. The pod of dolphins surrounded him and shot a beam of frequencies at his ballsack and cooked out his ball cancer

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>>18620800
Dolphins DO like balancing balls on their noses.

>>18618252

Dolphin are so smart, they have sex for fun, kill for fun, rape other species, rape their own, and ask for kelp fare

Fucking mamals get off my sea.

Make Ocean Great Again.

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>>18620800
>diagnosed with testicular cancer
>take PCP and jump in sea to look for dolphins

makes perfectly good sense

>>18620820
and still, it gets even better. He was never diagnosed with cancer. He merely intuited that the blood he peed out was cancer, cooked out of his prostate by dolphin frequencies.

>>18620675
Speaking of that, according to /an/, they have a fluid that makes you able to bust over and over without going soft in their vag secretions.

Also they can totally control the muscles in there.

Dolphins are intelligent vicious fuckers who act cute in order to gain our trust when they are really against us. I bet they are planning an invasion right now with help from human sympathizers. We need to learn from the Japs and the Danes and kill them before they kill us.

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>>18620869
Agreed. It has already begun and we must act quickly and decisively. This is dolphin thread is now a dolphin threat thread.

>>18620869
>The dolphins fear the samurai.

This is one of the most 4chan threads I ever seen.

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Species traitor kissing the blowhole of an undersea oppressor. Is this the future you want?

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>>18620943
Way more capable

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Trying to appease a sea-demon by feeding it their first born.

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>>18620952
Their blood-lust knows no bounds.

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/2017/02/10/record-number-dolphins-found-coast-scotland/

Obviously a recent false flag attack by the dolphin leaders on their own kind to elicit sympathy of naive humans. We must fight back against this propaganda

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Bears are natural enemies of dolphins, much in same way unicorns hate narwhals.

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>>18621054

>>18620952
enlighten me here I just don't understand why anyone could hate a dolphin? that's like saying you hate titties.

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>>18621209
>shill for the rapists of the seven seas detected

>>18618252
no, they're dolphins.

>>18621217
prove they're rapists though? oh wait you can't because that's just a meme and not true.

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According to marine experts, the bottlenose dolphin murders fellow underwater inhabitants for the sheer fun of the kill.

Studying the endless tide of dead porpoises that wash ashore daily from Scotland to Virginia. Biologists found that the porpoises had died of broken ribs, damaged livers, and imploded lungs, which served as tell-tale signs of prolonged, focused attacks. The teeth marks discovered on the bodies left no doubt the deaths were caused by dolphins.

As scientists looked closer at stories of drowning people being 'saved' by dolphins it became clear the dolphins were really trying to rape and/or disembowel the people for sick Cetacea reasons of their own.

http://scribol.com/environment/animals-environment/bottlenose-dolphin-the-only-marine-animal-that-kills-for-fun/

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>>18621222
Dolphins Are Dangerous Animals That Could Rape You And Kill Your Baby

Dolphins try to rape and drown people; they gang rape their females and sometimes hold them hostage for weeks; they murder baby porpoises for fun; they kill the babies of rival male dolphins, because as soon as her child dies, a female dolphin is ready to be raped and impregnated immediately.

http://www.businessinsider.com/dolphin-assisted-birth-is-dangerous-2013-5

>>18621238
Again this is just bottlenose dolphins and not all cetaceans.

And it's still a bit of a stretch for even a biologist to say this is just for fun. They don't know what these creatures are thinking or why they're really doing this. The porpoise could be competition for food.

Also still waiting for someone to prove to me that they're rapists. But they can't. I wonder why.....

check this lads
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/article-3346588/What-dolphins-REALLY-Stunning-image-shows-diver-eyes-mammal-reveals-animals-send-images-water-other.html

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>>18621222
ACTUAL video of dolphin trying to rape a human.

[ caution shows dolphin dick, I'm serious ]

https://www.youtube.com/embed/IlaZis3KQl8?wmode=opaque

>>18621245
and we know that the females are being raped how? did you ask them? How the hell do you know that it's not just part of their courtship? Seriously I really refuse to believe that animals rape each other and if you do you are a full fledged retard.

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10 Reasons Why Dolphins Are A$$holes

http://www.deepseanews.com/2013/02/10-reasons-why-dolphins-are-aholes/

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>>18621255
>thinks rape is a game

>>18621251
I don't know what the big deal is human beings rape and murder all the time and no one makes a big deal about them. hell some of them you assholes hail as role models and heroes

>>18621260
nah I just think half of the people in this thread are more likely to rape someone, or already have, than any of the dolphins I know.

>>18621268
>any of the dolphins I know
Do you know them intimately? Dolphins are masters of deception.

>>18621275
They are not. It seems not one person knows anything about dolphins in this thread except for me.

So see ya. Have fun jerking each other off about how much you hate dolphins.

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>>18621292
>I understand dolphins!
>I'm special, I can speak to them!
>Dolphins are nice and would never hurt you!

You're delirious, seek mental help

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>>18621251

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Godamn Undead Desert Dolphin -- no place is safe

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dolphin-phile gal has yet to explain this: >>18621251

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>>18621238

>>18618252
So long and thanks for all the fish m8

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>>18618252

Excuse me did I hear anyone mention "Dolphins" ?

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>>18621217 results in image related

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Dolphin attempting to snatch child off deck of a small boat

>>18618252
So /x/ you know that feeling you have before your about to sleep or when your half awake? Its like your brain is running at 1000 km an hour over normal speed. Lately now I've been seeming like visions. Not like in the movies but like I've been seeing random people I've never seen before. Like just them with a black background. Can anyone explain this?

>>18620697
You're not a dolphin, you're a whale

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>>18620549
this guy looks really mystical and is obviously more highly evolved than us.

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>>18620657
what are the odds that you had a dream about swimming with dolphins a few days before you actually did it? did ya know u were going to be swimming with dolphins? if so i'd say the odds are high in your favor...

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>>18623261

wow, great .gif

>>18620659

man and dolphin hand-job, I kid you not
https://www.liveleak.com/view?i=304_1474213197

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>>18623289

wait for it, at .41 dolphin pops boner goes full attack on female's pussy
https://www.youtube.com/embed/1hQZj9lMg5I?rel=0

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Yet another assault by a sea-demon
https://www.liveleak.com/view?i=82d_1422674444

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dolphin with hook and link stuck in it approaches diver and waits patiently as human removes the line and hook
https://www.liveleak.com/view?i=493_1394821299

Tourists on boat see a pod of majestic dolphins, then orcas show up and start eating the dolphins -- half the crowd laughs, half gasps in terror.

https://www.liveleak.com/view?i=b42_1391491813

Sign on beach says dolphins WILL ATTACK, dopey treehuggers go in anyway. Dolphins attack them

https://www.liveleak.com/view?i=68b_1375936218

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>>18621238

>>18620669
>dolphins
>trained to rape
They do it completely independently. Dolphins are notorious for being sex maniacs. Even in the wild they will rape each other and even human divers.

Something something Hitchhikers guide something something thanks for the fish

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The Face of True Evil

>>18620659
MIIIIMSSSYYY

>>18621268
>any of the dolphins I know
Are you a rapist? Birds of a feather...

>>18620697
I'd share coitus with you.

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>I, for one, welcome our sex-crazed dolphin overlords

dolphins are chill

They surf with us, hurt sharks near us, and drag drowning people to shore

>>18624897
>did not read thread
>did not watch the videos

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>>18624904
When will they ever learn.

>>18623261
he doesnt use his hands as humans do, clearly they are more advanced than us

i even bet they have some kind of dolphin porn based on waves and some other dolphin shit

modern languages derive from math encodings which come from energy frequencies which used to be pure sound waves and before that were just thought patterns. who knows what they're really talking about. :o

>>18621250

>dolphins communicate by sending images via sonar to each other.

dolphins are the original meme posters

>>18621617
threads like this were part of why, right?

>>18620657
I hear killer whales are really friendly and know the secrets to life. You should try swimming with them

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>>18623522
They'll even kill the offspring of a mother just to rape her
They truly are the worst animal in the entire animal kingdom.

tfw no dolphin gf

>>18618252
Is Mario sunshine worth emulating?

>>18621395
You forget she's a whale herself
>>18620697
So I don't think they'd be interested

>>18618252
No.

>>18626592
I fucking hate dolphins.

They're ugly rapists I hope they go extinct

>>18618291
I saw a project Camelot interview with a guy who claims this. Can't find it at the moment but it should be on youtube.

>>18622991
>ten ways to get yourself mauled by a shark

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We need to fight dolphin rape with rape

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>>18618252
Dolphins are from the delphinus star constellations. They are known to speak dolphin and English with a southern US dialect.

>>18628101
Forget proof:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hnVAv77gEqo

>>18623365
*reads sign*
"Nah dude... That's like... Don't be a bigot dude... Dolphins are like.. a cetacean of peace man.... All dolphins welcome dude...."
Pic related based on a true story
>>18618291
>>18627726
I don't know. But something closer to reality is that they were training dolphins for war
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Military_dolphin they even at some point a fixed some kind of gun to the dolphins so they could shoot the enemy in the water

>>18628101
Pf.. Just another crockpot ramblings of a schizo troll on /x/!...

Ignore.....

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>>18628115
Stop projecting and learn the truth about dolphins. Do your own research and see for yourself. Space is very much like water on earth.

>>18628119

Except the almost complete lack of oxygen atoms

I don't know who is more insane the person that thinks dolphins can talk oe the guy who dolphins are the reincarnations of serial killers, nazis and michael jackson

>>18628135
Almost? So there are some oxygen atoms in Space?

>>18620694
I had one of these as a kid, we used it as a pool toy

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Grew up in the Keys, there was a dolphin place there. This guy worker there, had degree in biology, used to hang with family nest door, pretty daughters, w/e. One day we asked him about dolphin intelligence, etc. 1/2

2/2 Wow, terrible typing. Anyway he said since they didn't have the hand, and were more like a fish, their brains went into a different direction. But their brains developed to be larger and have more crenulations in the surface than those of a human, hence were potentially much more intelligent than a human.

2/3 as it turns out. After a year of more of working with them, he had some kind of a breakthrough regarding their intelligence. Somehow they let him know just how bright they were, and it scared the hell out of him.
He said it was too heavy to talk about. Right after that he left the Keys. Someone said he went to Iowa.

>>18628649
Wonder what it was that made him leave.

I remember getting linked to some weird site back in '07 or '08 that described exactly how to court and have sex with dolphins. It was fucked, the guy talked about how he'd been in relationships with them and everything.

>>18628546
>>18628575
>>18628649

What do you think happened

>>18629085
I read that, the one where he got in the water and the dolphin came up and rolled over for him? Shit was wild.

>>18618252
Dolphins are Atlanteans who transmutated into beings that could survive the deluge. The other ones went into the inner worlds such as Shambala.

>>18629085
>>18629386
http://www.sexwork.com/family/dolphins1.html

>>18623782
Underrated post.

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>>18630270
>>18623782
Appropriately rated post

>>18621238
So they do have a porpoise to kill after all.

>this thread
wtf i hate dolphins now

>>18630153

uh, what the fuck mate. I mean good for him but that's a fucking dolphin.

>>18628649
What do I think happened?
Don't really know. We puzzled over it for ages.
It even occurred to us that it had something to do with sex. Dolphins, when penned up, so seem to experience sexual frustration.
Or it may have been some kind of mental telepathy link he formed with one, giving him insight into their undoubtedly high intelligence.
In any case, he told us he REALLY didn't want to talk about it, packed up and left town.

>>18630845
Damn dolphins, always breaking your heart.

Dolphin Chad get all the wet attractive ones.

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>>18630845
The dolphin showed him visions of the countless number of people suffering in hell

>>18618252
the supernatural ability to rape and kill. kill them first. not belugas though, they're pretty neat and very intelligent.

>>18620699
based komodos doing god's work.

>>18620549
can you just go to the zoo and telepathize with dolphins?

Dolphin pussy is supposed to be good

>>18632051
They have prehensile dicks, too. Why aren't you cro-magnons fucking dolphins?

>>18632048
Are dolphins in the zoo, I tought they were only in water parks.

>>18632071
>prehensile dicks

Another skill I need to develope.

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>>18630845
Sorry, but that guy is probably dead. The dolphins telepathically mind fucked him

>>18628227

Yes, its one of the more common elements out in space. Though were talking extremely minute quantities. Even less when you level the solar system and even more less when you leave the galaxy but still present.

We haven't found o2 molecules (combined oxygen atoms) which is what we breathe but oxygen atoms yes.

Do dolphins have rape caves, or was that ducks?

Dolphins talk to humans and commit suicide just like when humans talk to aliens,
https://youtu.be/uNhR-16r5lM

>>18632027
Is this you?

>>18632086
>They even rape you on a mental level
Truly a vile creature

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dolpgonds are pieces of shit.