Alien abduction prevention

>>17786432
>does not stop buglars
heh deep

>>17786432
Depends on the type of entity in question.

Do the helicopter dick

>>17786432
Drink lots of coffee and take lots of no doze . Never sleep and have a semi-auto 12 gauge handy .

>>17786432
Ya don't be a fucking pussy

I've been begging aliens and ghosts to fuck with me for years but they don't because they know I'll fuck their shit up

Just don't be afraid and they'll never bother you cause they are actually a bunch of pansy ass jabronies

>>17786432
Im an expert on alien abduction and there is not one reported case of a homosexual being taken.

>>17786432
hide in basment with tinfoil on ur gourd and a cork up ur pooty hole and a super soaker full of cat pee :D

aliens are fucking RUTHLESS, bro.

>>17786869
Bullshit I'm literally praying for them to fuck with me yet they've been too much of a little bitch even to give me the slightlest inkling of aggression. I honestly want them to try to step with me but they know they'd be going down. Pathetic

>>17786790
That wet dream homo's have is from when the aliens are probing them .

They really don't like being headbutted, and are unusually vulnerable to knapped flint or obsidian.

Though I suggest some sort of copper net instead of a shield.

>>17786858
Don't forget to call the cops as well

alien abduction is nothing more then astral projection, look it up

>>17788155
alien projection is nothing more than astral abduction, look it up

Lol I posted in another thread about this but of course the shitposters were all over me for even suggesting that abductions were astral and now we have this...

Anyway calling out to jesus christ stops abductions.

>>17788388
same, but meh throwing pearls in front of swines dunno why do i even try xd

>>17786432
tinfoil hat

>>17786432
apparently a Baton helped a guy on /x/ beat the shit out of one

Brass Knuckles
Baseball Bat
Baton

>>17788378
Looking it up is nothing more than alien astral. Project abductions.

>>17786432
The best way is to live on the planet Earth, where aliens have never visited.