superpowers

>book flight to Japan
>go to Fukishima
>splash around

And that's how Lymphoma Man was made n

>>17549055
No wonder the Asians are so advanced

You can gain the power to kill anybody you point at.

All you need to do to acquire this power is buy a gun

>>17549059
It's true.

You're not up for it.

>>17549055
>>17549066
I got two dubs in the same thread. Maybe I'm wrong and superpowers are real.

Find a way to drop your morals and empathy-related feelings that cause you distress

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This little nigga was born with a mutation that gave him super strength. His body produces little myostatin, which inhibits muscle growth so his muscles grew unchecked.

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>>17549069
Two dubs already? You make me wanna fap

>>17549051
Bump
>>17549079
So x men is real at least

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>>17549051
Keep this thread alive

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>>17549051

Not to worry, my friend! At Shocker, we can upgrade you beyond the puny limitations of the flesh!

Cast aside your mortality and human weakness, and upgrade yourself to a Shocker Inhumanoid! Or ショッカー怪人, if you're feeling weebish.

And it's not just for you! Upgrade your family! Your friends! That dickhead neighbour! Fuck that guy! Our upgrade and reeducation program is for all humanity! Whether they want it or not!

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Do you want a haircut?
The Beyond Corporation©'s gonna help you out
Do you need a toothbrush?
The Beyond Corporation©'s got an extra one
Do you have a step-son?
The Beyond Corporation©'s gonna rub him out
Do you see a monster?
Or a pirate?
Electric emu?
A giant sky-rat?
A midget Hitler?!
Or Pontius Pilate!
Don't call your mom or your doctor,
Just pick up the phone and call!
NEXTWAVE!

Also they were founded by a dinosaur.

>>17549079
>super strength

more like super fucked up bone structure and horrible vascular problems

kid will probably die in his 30s and not even be as strong as a professional weightlifter who just trained to get strong

Self-hypnosis is the best I can offer you OP.

Scientologists are rumored use it to give birth silently, without drugs, that's how effective it is at pain suppression.

It has apparently been shown in studies to make athletes perform better.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sports_hypnosis
Although, I gotta say, that entire page reads like an attempt to hypnotise readers into employing hypnotists for their sports team. But I have read other accounts of sports performance being enhanced quite dramatically.

It can also enhance healing to some degree, or so I've read (and in my limited unscientific experience).

The Silva Mind Method feels a lot like going into a trance and claims to give people powers of telepathy and mind control. That's almost certainly bullshit but it is good for pain suppression. I've personally used their trance (they call it "the Alpha level of mind") to totally reduce pain almost to nothing. It also seems to heal stuff quicker in my experience, but I haven't done any kind of experimentation there, it might've just been normal healing.

If you wanna learn more, do what I do and search Amazon for books on it then pick a couple of cheap ones that got lots of good ratings and reviews.

>>17549084
>tumblr_mk8jf3NUG01r2g7mto1_540.jpg
you have no idea what you make me wanna.

>>17549051

They're not real. Kill yourself.

>>17549279

Yeah, but at least he looks like a sick cunt.

>>17549051
I have the power to make myself invisible, but only when no ones looking

>>17549388
And the power to get dubs too apparently

>>17549388
Too bad you don't have the power to save your failed career, Kel

>>17549051
If you live a nice life, that is a superpower on it's own.

>>17549389
Mwahahaha behold and tremble

>>17549084
Thx bae going for triple dubs.

Become a Freemason and start raping toddlers?

>>17549400
>>17549055
>>17549066

And I got it.

>>17549051
Pull on your ballsack really hard and you're gain the power of "supersonic scream". Try it out, it's legit

>>17549419
DONT DO THIS, it creates mustard gas

>>17549419
Damn, I fucked up my grammar.
>you'll

>>17549405
This is now a how many dubs can I get thread.

>>17549405
>>17549433
Can I get quint dubs?

>>17549371
> post said inb4 suicide

>>17549279
Look him up. He has no flaws. Don't hate on him. He is naturally athletic unlike you

>>17549436
Reroll

>>17549457
Fuck my cock. If this isn't dubs I'll probably go. I doubt it though.

>>17549462
Ok. I'm leaving nigga. My superpower of dubs have left me.

>>17549437

It also said inb4 not real. It's almost as if I was working off a theme.

>>17549051
Knowledge ...

I wouldn't say superpower, but you can get a few extra "help" from some itens. Nothing that you can measure like flight or superstrenght, but a little (or alor) more luck, protection or help with people.
I really like the luck ones.

>>17549512
>Nothing that you can measure
^ oh so that certain kind of bullshit you dont have to prove, noice

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I knew it. /x/ has lots of magic posts but it's all bullshit and roleplay. What a disappointment.

>>17549653
>disappointment
What were you expecting?

>>17549653
erm, no shit? you really thought there were people here trading magical spoopy spells and superpowers? if you believe anything different then you already have a superpower

Its called retardation
it has
a free qt3.141 tard wrangler
unusual mild strength
the ability to never be sold small pets
the ability to produce ungodly annoyingsounds

congratulations now please leave

>>17549767
Nigger I already knew that. I'm just basically confirming what I said.

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>>17549397
Awwwww.

>>17549055
>>17549066
>>17549222
>>17549388
>>17549399
>>17549400
>>17549433
>>17549922
what the fuck is with this tread

>>17549433
Dubs Man Returns!

>>17550078
OP wanted superpowers so I showed him the power of quad dubs. >>17549055
>>17549066
>>17549400
>>17549433

I am the Dubs. Aside from that it's a faggy OP wanting to be Gambit or something.

>>17549405
Pro skills

>>17550140
A god among men

>>17549079
This is what the original hercules was like
>inb4 stfu zeus isn't real
get a cock out your mouth you know what i mean

>>17549581
How can you measure your increase of luck?

>>17550140
>>17550195
>>17550197

Dubs Man Reborn maybe?

>>17552442
Dubs within dubs. I'll take it. I am reborn.

>>17550140
Nah I wanted to be quicksilver

>>17549051
100 pushups
100 situps
100 squats
10 km runs
Every. Single. Day

>>17552465
That's a good choice.

Dubs Man!

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Jesus anons still getting dubs. This is a get thread

>>17552467
The first three are childs play. But fuck running mang.

>>17549051
Yes

>>17549405
>>17552442
>>17553144


I am the Dubs.

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Yes.

Not sure what this thread's all about but CHECK EM

>>17553214
I have failed you. I'll do better. I'll be the hero Dubs City needs.

>>17553502
But not at that time.

>>17549051
.superpowers
i have the ability to make people hear things
without moving my mouth

>>17553777
that is funny because i have the ability to hear things

>>17553777
I'm hearing those trips god damn

>>17553777
Dubs Man mentor has arrived. Hail The Tripster.

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>>17553777
I'm checking that!

Attain a pure mind and no harm will come to you. That's a pretty super power if you ask me.

But I bet you wanted the other type of super power that lets you control the surrounding world directly with logical ego-based thoughts.

>>17554790
>but I bet you wanted actual superpowers

>>17553144
>>17550128
heh