Lip sma/ck/im delights

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^^

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Oh

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Chicano guy spills his tacos like a total jerk

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I wish i could enjoy my sna/ck/$ this way sometimes

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●_●

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5

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4

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3

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2

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1

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0

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>>1617233
>>1617235
>>1617246
>>1617245
>>1617242
>>1617239
00


After a drink or two
Maybe stay the night and I'll make you some breakfast or at least a coffee in the morning

>>1617182
is that a dog or a cat?

>>1617162
The US people have an amazing talent in making otherwise healthy foods almost toxic for your body.

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>>1617790
The point is to trick kids into eating fruit because they accidentally made them all fat with shit like this

>>1617779
Looked decent for like... 1 minute man.

I'd take a bite outta curiosity and pass it on.

>>1617779
I was telling my dad about how mexican street vendors do this thing where they make whatever they're making really appetizing at one point, then completely ruin it with way too much shit.

>>1617795
>>1617779
What the fuck is wrong with you people.

>>1617162
acidic and topped with lots of sugar. Not so great for your teeth

>>1617182
i think your cat has autism

>>1618084
don't you hate on fair food you homo

>>1617779
>>1617795
I am american and I think these would be disgusting.

>>1617642
I knew what this was from the second shot, though, and I wanted it.

>>1618084
FaceBook Autistic "Cooking"

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>>1618771

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>>1618772

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>>1618774

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>>1618776

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>>1618780

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>>1618781

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>>1618783

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>>1618784

>>1618781
>>1618780
>>1618776
>>1618774
Thx anon
It makes my day watching and saving such fine contributions

>>1618774
The way he violently grabbed the fish made me kek. "cmere lil fucker"

>>1617174
Just me or a lot of stuff being wasted trimming that much just to cut faster?

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>>1619496
Yes french cooking is mighty wasteful although the spare parts can be used for veggie soup stock

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>>1618836
>>1618836
Come here

>>1617233
git push alcohol?

>>1620530
Thought I was the only one that noticed lmao

>>1618774
>>1618776
>>1618780
>>1618781
These are so goddamn satisfying to watch. Oh man.

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>>1621123
>satisfying
Like this kinda satisfaction

>>1617189
>The C on the sign partially blocked
Praise mighty Talos!

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just made

>>1617195
Watched too many loops until I realised it was perfectly looped.

>>1621895
I think you're missing
A GUN
Otherwise, that looks tasty.

>>1620541
kys

>>1622735
Underage b&

>>1622540
I want to make an asbestos condom and then put my dick in those buns

>>1619496
It's about presentation and even cooking. Obviously if you're cooking at home or even in the vast majority of restaurants then having only 80% of your potatoes be perfect cubes isn't going to make any difference.

>>1622641
I chuckled
>>1621895
ingredients and method?

>>1622735
an hero

>>1617168
How to make dough, dhough?

>>1624780
lol

>>1617795
IT'S BEEN THREE YEARS JUST EDIT OUT THE FUCKING DOUBLE BIT JESUS

>>1617162
hfs, this is brilliant

>>1618772
God bless those Koreans' Seouls.

>>1624900
Badum tss

>>1617779
I told my friend to come watch this. His reaction:

"A couple meats and some provalone, what's wrong with that? That looks like a good sandwich. Oh, I guess he's gonna grill it up. That looks nice. Bacon and provalone? Maybe he's making another sandwi OH GOD DON'T PUT IT ON THERE. I guess it could be okay... Wait what's he doing to those french fries NO"

>>1625824
Pretty much

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>>1618774
>>1618776
>>1618780
>>1618781
YFW the movie is about his ungrateful daughters not appreciating his sunday dinner.

>>1624812
lol, i think that every time i see it

>>1625931
The most depressing video on the internet

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>>1624812
AYE AYE CAPTAIN

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doh

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+1

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damn im in the mood for some gator now

>>1617205
>dayums internally

>>1626857
what the fucking fuck does he think he's fucking doing? i mean... what? chopping a block of ice into a... smaller, irregular block that - well well well - fits in a fucking glass... so what?@!

>>1626874
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uZhnpAhYmb0
It tastes GOOD!

>>1626341
thank you based anon

>>1622540
t h i c c

>>1617642
i wanna fuck those cookies

>>1617189
lost at your comment

>>1617162 >1 bite
horrible
>>1617168 >3 bites
bad
>>1617174 >2 bites
bad
>>1617182 >10 bites
decent
>>1617189 >8 bites
ok
>>1617205 >2 bites
bad
>>1617235 >5 bites
ok
>>1617242 >2 bites
bad
>>1617245 >2 bites
bad
>>1617246 >0 bites
abysmal
>>1617253 >0 bites
terrible
>>1617642 >1 bite
myopic
>>1617779 >12 bites!
delicious
>>1617795 >8 bites
nice try
>>1618771 >7 bites
ok
>>1618772 >5 bites
not acceptable
>>1618774
>>1618776
>>1618780 >10 bites
very good
>>1618781 >2 bites
awful
>>1618783 >3 bites
nah
>>1618784 >17 bites
radical!
>>1618785 >6 bites
decent
>>1620207 >4 bites
no way
>>1620510 >1 bite
weak
>>1620709 >1 bite
bad
>>1620711 >1 bite
not good
>>1620717 >1 bite
try again
>>1621457 >5 bites
not quite
>>1621895 >4 bites
poor effort
>>1622540 >15 bites
excellent
>>1622545 >2 bites
no
>>1622666 >26 bites
me likey
>>1625931 >15 bites
now were getting somewhere
>>1625939 >8 bites
alright
>>1626341 >10 bites
good
>>1626857 >-1 bites
exceeding poor
>>1626862 >1 bite
try again never
>>1626874 >62 bites
full course

Meal time

>>1617642
Source on the music please!

>>1625939
That's cute, not gonna lie.

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Anymore bartending webms?

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>>1628845

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>>1628851

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>>1628852

>>1628800
Most impressive thing in this entire thread is that no one called you a faggot

>>1628857
Whose a faggot? I'm no faggot. Did someone just call me a faggot? Shows how much they know, lol! I'm not a faggot, you're the faggot. Jesus christ theres a faggot in this thread?

>>1628990
faggot

>>1628800
I value your opinion.

>>1628852
>literal semen

>>1628800
Thank you for your valuable feedback, kind anon!

>>1628800
>autism

>>1629055
check'd

>>1628851
>Literally just a single drop of vermouth
Holy fuck, why not just drink chilled gin straight out of the bottle?

>>1626938
cute post dude

>>1620541

This looks fucking disgusting.

>>1617162
I fucking hate my country

>>1626938
rich people are stupid
this man has found a way to charge like $30 for drink

>>1629442
Because then it won't have that little zing the vermouth adds, along with the little bit of water from the melted ice.

If "very cold gin" doesn't sound good to you, drink better gin.

>>1628851
>single drop of... vinegar?
>the liquor
>half a third a splash of other liquor
>spin in glass for hours
>bend fruit at it
That'll be $65

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>>1628845
A few, nothing new though.

>>1628800
What the fuck

>>1629506
hi

>>1624812
>>1626341
I knew eventually someone would do it for me

>>1626938
He carves it into a sphere.

The sphere is the geometrical shape with highest volume and lowest surface, it's the optimal shape for ice since it will last as much as possible while watering the beverage the least.

It's still fucking retarded as far as I am concerned and I feel it for the man because god knows that handling ice daily like that with your bare hands WILL result in fucked up hands later in life, if he isn't suffering from arthritis or such already.

>>1629945
He didn't even make it a sphere
He made it the shape of the glass

>>1629490
Nice filename

>>1629943
Is that from a porno or something?

>>1617779
why the fuck do they wrap it then cut it, goddam that triggers my autism too fucking much. this webm is a mess.

>>1626857
Meanwhile, a queue of 50 people has formed waiting for a god damn bottle of beer

>>1630021
her name is ava dalush

>>1629477
>vinegar?
bitters

>>1628800

>double dubs
>it's a "my weenus peenus of course!" tier post

>>1622540

my wife made these they turned out pretty good although I think ours tasted a little too eggy and not as bready.

>>1626862
How much do you think that costs?

>>1630438
I'd pay 3 dollars including tip.

>>1630444
Seems reasonable

>>1626857
why not just get a smaller version of the glass and freeze some water in it

>>1617779
>>1617795
No wonder why America is so fucking fat

>>1628843
It does at first

Until a few seconds later the director makes them repeat the same lines over and over again and then takes the food away from the family.

>>1621457
>modelo in the background
like a true spic

>>1629489
>they got porn to watch
this isnt ylyl

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^^

>>1628800
You fucking twat.

>>1624780
It's called Batter - flour, cornmeal, an egg and some sugar, salt

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>>1626857
just look at how proud he is

>>1629943
yeeaah, keep those titteies in frame ol boy

>>1630489
I dunno. That looks kinda fun.

>>1630858
Thanks

>>1626862
>adding one single fucking drop of anything
>mattering

No.

>>1626857

So not only does he waste an hour of your life to make your drink cold, but he fills up way more of the glass than regular ice would so you can get less of the actual drink in it, and also ensures that there's more ice to melt and dilute it more.

Genius.

>>1631379
>what are concentrates
i bet you hate ice cream.

>>1626862
Had this at a bar with 5 seats total lol. tasted like you stuck a log of campfire wood in your drink while it was on fire. cost like 20-25, totes not worth it. but it was interesting to watch

>>1626862
Is having complicated alcohol carefully prepared for you by someone with a professional demeanour the dude equivalent of women spending an afternoon getting their nails did?

>>1631512
You have no idea how fucking gay this is

>>1625939
Wouldn't drinking 70ml of fermented pickling brine a day eventually kill you?

>>1631379
Lemme sprinkle a drop of pee in all your drinks.

>>1629489
i bet she gives a toothy blowjob. ug. too bad

>>1631796
... what?

No. It's just salt water with some local yeasts it happened to culture and a few bits of chili and other shit you may like in your kimchi.

70ml is like a shot and a half. It has the same effects on your gut flora as eating a single serving of active culture yogurt.

>>1631848
Yeah but it's gotta be 30x the daily intake of sodium

>>1631873
70 ml of dill pickle juice is about 200-400mg of salt depending. Kimchi brine is basically the same, just with cabbage as the product instead of cucumbers.

That's up to a fifth of a given recommended daily allowance for a person eating 2000 kCal a day. Unless you're extremely hyper- or hyponatremic you can go over or under basically as much as you feel like depending on how much water you drink to go along with it.

So unless you have abnormal kidney function there's not any reason to be wary.

>>1631924
Correction: 100-300mg of salt per 70ml.

>>1631956
H O M E M A D E
O
M
E
M
A
D
E

>>1631379
>obviously has no idea what bitters are
There's a reason the drinking age is 21.

>>1632192
Because by then you hopefully tasted enough different shit, so that you don't embarrass yourself when finally buying your own stuff.

>21
No. Pathetic country.

>>1631956
Holy sheep shit

>>1631956
>Pulls out a can of sugar sauce, calls it home made
What did she mean by this?

>>1632877
Sigourney had a hard life.

>>1617182
What the fuck is that, a fox?

>>1620541
Whyyyyyyyyyyy

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>>1632941
>fox
we have a winner
grats baby

>>1617779
Reminds me of Fat Sals in LA

>>1617182
what is this dogbreed called, I need a new pillow for my sofa.

>>1629495
wouldn't it be cooler to let the ice melt and slowly release the smoke?

>>1617205
You shouldn't have to bite into a rib like that

>>1617779
I guarantee you no one who weighs less than 350lbs order this

>>1618772
Fucking beautiful

>>1622906
Those are cheese cakes

>>1630342
Bready? They're cheese cakes

>>1622545
I get sick when ever I eat one of these
I think it's something about the fat that makes my stomach upset

>>1625931
>YFW the movie is about his ungrateful daughters not appreciating his sunday dinner.
Does he end up dying in the end and they're like, wtf we wasted all out time together

>>1626938
The ice is supposed to be imported glacier ice, which is why it came in a larger block.
The shape it cuts it into is supposed to help infuse into drinks.
Some drinks are enhanced by the water infusing into it

>>1629489
>how to make the drink
>put equal parts of differently colored alcohol which are weighted differently

>>1631956
>>1632065
>>1632877
If you want to see real home made sauce, check this out
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=waBDP2zG6Gc

>>1617596
yes

>>1633472
Yes, that's the good shit.

>>1633431
125lb here, would order the fuck out of that if i knew where to find it

>>1617779
I was a little less willing to eat it with each addition beyond the prosciutto. I mean, I'd still order after the second stuffing but not with fries mashed up inside it. Just put them on the side.

>>1617642
>raisins

>>1628800
>multiquoting

don't do this

>>1631956
Anyone know where to watch the whole video? She took it down from her channel. I remember flipping the fuck out with /ck/ when it was first posted there and I want to experience that again.

>>1634447
those are chocolate chips

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>>1628857
>>1629055
>>1629060
>>1629213
>>1629418
>>1629506
>>1630339
>>1630839
>>1633790
>>1634517
>when they respond to your shitpost
>when you get dubdubs
tfw

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surprised this wasn't posted yet

>>1635073
>>1635071
why? thats not how your supposed to use that!
cant you just once not fuck up? and whats with that quantity? do you want to eat or are you Fattening cattle for slaughter? a nations of mental handicapped people.

>>1635073

way too much fucking cheese bro

>>1617162
I would've just eaten that apple by itself.

fuck

>>1628800
Faggot.

>>1635089
Dude it's fucking called street food, every country serves heaping loads of shit for like $10 a bowl.

>>1635067
Food porn at its finest

>>1635089
>>1635105
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Raclette

>>1631956
Jesus that's just gruesome

>>1625824

cool story bro

>>1618784
the dude says there are 57 eggs in there, jesus

>>1636459
WHO STOLE THREE OF GASTON'S EGGS?

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party time

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dope

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hey yo!

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this is my guess how america makes its pasta

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^^

>>1628851
At least he used gin and not vodka

>>1626857
>>1626862
>>1628851
>>1628852
>>1628854
>>1629495
>>1629503
>justifying 25 minute wait times and 800% markups

>>1620541

I would that.

>>1622540

This is you anon picking waifus every season.
Feel bad anon, feel very bad.

>>1635067

Way to fuck it up with peppers and shit.

>>1629503

That's some serious avatar shit right there.

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I tried to make this last year. It didn't go well.

>>1635075

>niegga owh nhow

Always gets me goddamn it.

>>1638077
JUST GIVE ME THE DAMN ICE CREAM ALREADY

>>1633472
The only spice in that is salt, its gonna be bland as fuck.

>>1638056
I'm pretty sure this is fun and all, but I don't speak pizza.

>>1638097

>melted butter

Yeah nah.

Stopped watching there.

>>1638463
I'm pretty sure you can replace it with hemp oil or gojiberry extract or what ever it is that you fair folk use.

>>1638056
>pepe
HE SAID IT
AAAAAAAAA

>>1638062
That looks like ja\ck\.
It's a miracle he didn't cover that with processed cheese.

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>>1638193
>tomatoes have no flavor
>you cant add spices to need when you are making food
someone hasnt jarred food for storage before
____________________

also im taking requests cause im at a computer so
>drop a youtube link
>sound, replace sound with song, or no sound
im fairly new to this so ill just be practicing so hold your britches

>forgot image

>>1638014
I wonder if any of the tobacco companies tried this

>>1638077
This is one of those things where you're hella annoyed 15 seconds in but you keep smiling and playing along cuz you don't want to look like an asshole

>>1638006
What song is that

>>1631457
desu id rather have my nails did. my cuticles are fucked up atm

>>1639047
>top 10 times the simpsons predicted the future

>>1638097
Would avocado oil work as a good substitute for the butter?

>>1628800
Kill yourself for wasting that get on your autism

>>1638066
>0:40
OK, you turned a carrot inside out, fair enough mate

>lattice structure
Ohlawdy!

>>1622666
nearly everything in this video has about 50% too much stuff on it

>>1628851
>literally drops

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>>1631512
this was really fucking annoying to watch

>>1638077
THERE
GOES
MY
HERO

does anyone have that one webm where a russian guy is grilling grapes and then he says "A little taste; A little sensation."? He's also wearing a ski mask, I have been looking for this video for two years and really need to find it again.

>>1639286
>lattice structure
Wouldn't "Expanded Steel" had made more sense. Anyways, I still learned what a "lattice structure" is.

>>1618776
BRUH THAT SICK NASTY JULIENNE

What a fucking master, holy shit

>>1617779
I would eat the fuck out of this, I started making food just like it from 14 when I first learnt the frying pan

>>1620541

This is the foodporn equivalent of scat.

>>1638062
What's wrong with this?

>>1617779
That sandwich could be improved by chopping the fries just a bit and then mixing the fries with some eggs.

>>1638062
i might actually try making pasta like this sometime, looks neat. thanks anon.

>>1639047
Tried what, selling tobacco?

>>1617642
>creaming the butter and sugar with a whisk
that shit gets me angery
i need the music though

>>1638193
fuck you retard, it's fucking fresh tomato sauce, not pepperoni prego. Tomatoes, basil and salt.

>>1629490
literally a fucking potted plant

>>1640480
what would you use

>>1640513
>>1640480
>2017
>not creaming with your dick
lrn2cook plebs

>>1632968
holy shit it was my birthday

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>>1625939
The loving family almost distracted me from the framed portraits of Kim Il sung and Kim Jong Il in the background

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>>1640629
Pan, nice and hot.

>>1617168
is this a commentary on melting pot or what

>>1635073
>>1635071
Americans everyone

>>1620709
>>1620711
>>1620717

I really enjoy sushi but whenever I see it being made, part of my brain thinks "boy they're touching that food with their bare hands an awful lot".

Not sure why I can eat raw fish and think "that guy touched it!" is the main issue.

>>1635067
And of course the daily meal for your average American
Bunch of fucking, disgusting pigs

>>1641748
Those dishes aren't American, dumbass.

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>>1640541
>holy shit it was my birthday
did you get any?

>>1641799
Baited

>>1639064
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0trwO1xbv6E

>>1622540
I wanna FUCK that cake!

>>1641755
>Starving angry Ethiopian on a stolen smart phone detected.

>>1617642
>>1628829
>>1640480
finally found the fucking song, a bit of a let down desu, i thought it was gonna be a 10 minute Carbon Based Lifeforms ambient masterpiece, needless to say i was slightly disappointed
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cyZx_3U9LrE

>>1642872
>carbon based lifeforms
patrician taste, anon

>>1638056
I swear italians are the most pissy faggots when it comes to food
> You don't-a prepare peasant food like-a this you MUSTA do it like MEEEEEE REEEEEEEEEEEEEE

>>1642872
all your hard work, for what. im so sorry

>>1620541
get out and stay out

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no McTacos

>>1630505
that was an italian sandwich store
source
me, im italian and saw the original video

how fucking repulsive, way to waste some good porchetta

>>1617182
how would that be a cat?

>>1621901
it's not perfectly looped , his right hand (the left hand in the video) twitches really fast at the start of the loop.

>>1642998
you dont actually have to throw away your oven, anon.

>>1638097
I went to a food truck that was selling these the other day
They deep fried it though, rather than baking it

>>1639347
No it wasn't
I totally disagree with you

>>1649815

sauce?

>>1638062

yuck!!!!!!!!
overcooked pasta, undercoocked vegetables, and unless they used stock it will have no flavor

>>1617182

DIABETUS ALERT

>>1647897

Naw man, it's the law in Italy, if you do that shit

>>1617205
"oh lawd"

>>1618783
What's this song?

It sounds just like something that was popular not too long ago

>>1630534
your edge really turns me on anon

>>1653588

Don't you mean eggy :D

>>1618783
anyone have the jack version?

>>1626857
I skipped a bit towards the end and thought he magically carved a glass out of ice.

>>1639363
keked

>>1626876
This

>>1638077
>paying to get humiliated in public

>>1641755
I wish that was our average breakfast.

>>1626938
It's carved into a brilliant cut not a sphere you numbnuts, that's a way to cut gems to catch light.
He does it because it looks cool.
This ain't any kind of bar, it's some snobby club for rich people, there sn't a long line of people waiting for a drink and money isn't a concern for his target demographic.

>>1638084
Then go drink your hooch out of a paper bag then.

>>1631956
she cuts onions worse than i do
what the fuck

>>1638084
These are the kind of bars where you go for the personal experience. Isn't like the bars we have over here with super quick drinks.

>>1617795
A better strategy is to serve your kid balanced meals with obvious healthy parts so they're accustomed to it and form healthy habits as an adult.

>>1620541
eww, pickles

>>1629490
Making a mess on the drinking glass baka

>>1653550
It's "No place I'd rather be" or some shit like that. I feel like they jazzed it up a bit, but it might just be sans lyrics.

>>1659006
Get a load of this guy

>>1617642
Someone set this to the opening theme song to dexter

>>1625931
Holy fuck I want to buy that man a gin and tonic.

>>1617795
Hey there SHRIMP.
I know ALL about your lactose intolerance.

>>1631873
>Assuming on this level

>>1629497
If some alpine nigger tells you that glacier ice doesn't melt because its 'Super cold" or some horse shit hes pissing on your shoes and telling you its rain.

>>1626857
That's the kind of bartender that keeps the customers coming back... To see if their drink is ready yet.

>>1641755

Sorry to disappoint, but that's not a meal. That's from a promotional video for a southern food festival. It's the owner of a high end BBQ place showing every item on their menu.

>>1625931
god what the fuck is that song from. I know I have heard it from somewhere.

>>1665630

Dead Island trailer.

>>1631956
AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

>>1638006
Cancerous american "culture"

KYS

>>1638573
He hasnt plated yet

>>1639419
Sounds like life of boris to me

>>1639763
Ja/ck/ please

>>1635071
I can feel my arteries clogging as I watch this.

>>1640819
Every time I see it I'm scared it's a live lobster underneath it trying to make its escape.

>>1665542
how can you fuck up this bad?

>>1665542

This sounds like Carl Sagan making the worst grilled cheese in the world.