> favorite pokemon >darkest secret

glaceon
i came on my brother's pikachu plush once

Moltres
I killed my mother

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In highschool, i jerked off in a maths classroom to a blonde girl who had her leg over the other

Primarina

I touch, jerk off and suck all of my hot straight friends' cocks while they're asleep. The taste and smell drive me crazy.

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>>31192425
I mean, I knew that some shit is gonna happen in this thread, but wtf?

where do you live and how did you do it?

Espurr
I am 22 and I have an imaginary friend I talk to every day

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Eevee
Not really a "dark" secret per se, but when I was a little kid it took me three attempts to get through the episode of Pokemon where Ash crossdressed for the first time. To this day I have no idea why, but it might have been second hand embarrassment caused by a time prior when my sister dressed me up.

Weirdly enough I grew to enjoy crossdressing, so yeah.

Metagross
I hate these threads because it makes me jealous people's early sexual experiences. Lucky bastards.

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These threads are not as deep and superficial as you think.

>>31192441
USA, dont want to specify more, we live on the outsides, we lived alone, she was single, i just choked her in her sleep with a pillow, i dont think i had a reason at all, just did it for the hell of it I never got caught

>>31192394
Politoed
I hate autists

>>31192474
Kill yourself

>>31192441
Obviously he didn't reply to a post

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Who else?

>>31192548
[spoil]I pooped on the urinal and accused someone else.[/spoil]

>>31192442
My favourite is Sceptile and I can relate to your secret.

>>31192541
Gonna put a raincheck on that one.

>>31192425
sure you did

>>31192394
Ribombee
Came all over a toilet stall in high school, blamed some one else and got away with it

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Shinx and Vulpix

My first kiss was with my female cousin when I was 7.

>>31192438
Don't get caught. You gonna get your ass beat.

>>31192512
>deep and superficial
>what are antonyms

>>31192438
Tell me more, please. How do you get into these situations? What do you do? Any tips for aspiring ninja suckers?

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My foot fetish taste has been very daunting that I have been starting to go after male feet, specifically shota's and femboys

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>>31192394
Mimikyu
I'm a furfag

>>31194022
Verlis get out

>literally 10/15 confessions in this thread are sexual
really gets those brain processes going

>>31192528
>just did it for the hell of it
Sure you did, you fucking psycho.

>>31194043
I bet you're that guy who gets triggered in these threads by people having sex because you can't have sex

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Toxicroak

Not the worst thing i ever did but i was jealous of my older brother's superior pokemon and "dropped" his silver cartridge when we were hiking I proceeded to piss on it

>>31194076
masturbation =/= sex

Tyranitar
I don't have any dark secret. Yet.

>>31192555
Ctrl+S you dumb fuck

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Crobat
In high school, I convinced a retard who couldn't speak or write to pull the fire alarm to get out of a test.

>>31194160
How'd you do it?

>>31194179
He had no idea who I was so it was worth trying. Tard was outside his aid's office waiting to be escorted to his next class. Right outside the office was a fire alarm. The aid was distracted and I saw an opening. I told him to pull the handle and he would get a prize or some similar bullshit. He hesitated so I gave him $3 and I got some distance. He sperged over to the fire alarm, pulled it, and then freaked out when the alarm went off. Too late, I was already on my way. No way to blame me verbally or in writing since he couldn't do anything more than write his name. After that he would always get tard rage when he saw me in the halls but he was a retard so everyone thought he was just being him.

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my favorite HM slave and my first shiny

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>>31194101
I'll give you two months
I got 3 Silver versions, 1 Gold, 1 Crystal, 1 Emerald and 1 Platinum version that i either found or stole from classmates during my school days.

Nihilego
99% of my shit is sexual, not sexual abuse tho.
1. I used to fuck my sisters gag present blow up sheep with a dick hole when I was 13.
2. I used to frot with boys my age, and well I guess sometimes I was just the go-to fuck toy between the ages of 6 - 13. One of these boys was my brother.
3. To this day I'm not sure if I'm gay due to this whole experience or if I was always gay in general.
4. I also used to masturbate outside where everyone could possibly see me at a young age for the thrill.
5. I once let a dog lick my dick, it wouldnt fuck off while fapping so I was like fine. Felt lame and grossed me out, still grosses me out to this day.

>>31192512
deep and superficial.
ok, maybe your darkest secret is that you received a mexican education.

Also, you know sex and sexual experimentation is actually really fucking common and normal (and surprisingly with family members, mainly cousins)? You do realize that 14 year olds are getting pregnant, right? You know that sex is the leading cause of motherfucking procreation, right?

>>31194276
>I once let a dog lick my dick, it wouldnt fuck off while fapping so I was like fine.
Canadian detected

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I got molsted as a kid

>>31194297
no, but I understand your presumption

>>31194274
>Two months
Anon, this is my last HS year (where I live you're 19 or more when it ends) and my life is generally too boring for anything to happen

>>31194322
go find a gay guy in your school and make him suck your dick, its actually really easy (gay teenagers are fucking thirsty). do it for a story anon. its not the same if youre straight and its a girl, that just makes it a normal story.

I also give you 2 months

Zigzagoon

I masturbated while in bed with my mother

>>31194338
Yeah, no thanks
Also I remember now, I stole a GBC from an old friend of mine, he had 3 but he only has one brother
I still have and use that GBC

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I would sniff my uncles dirty underwear from the hamper because I had a crush on him. Didn't even know what I was doing I was so young, he was just so hot I had to do something.
I also took pictures of him while he slept in his underwear in the summer.

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I had a fetish before I knew what a fetish was
I was 10

I still have that fetish to this day

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I got a box full of bad dragon toys under my desk because my high libido makes me needy for furry/scaly dick about... well, every day actually. And not even the small ones, they're all XL ones.

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I feel little or sometimes no connection to my family, it's all fake and I actually hate a few of them.

Mimikyu.
I met my current gf while cheating on my bf. A little over a year into the relationship, I tried to cut contact with my gf, as I felt guilty about cheating on my bf, but they immediately sought me out, and I felt super terrible for that. Shortly afterwords, my bf broke up with me, so it all worked out in the end. Neither ever knew the other existed.
I sort of fell back in love with my gf once I recovered from the breakup with my bf. Now every day they tell me how wonderful and perfect I am, and that I'm such a great person and such, but I'm always thinking about how heartbroken they'd be if I told them the truth.
To make matters more complicated, my own family didn't know about her, so if they met, questions would be asked, someone would figure out that something's not quite right with the time line. My ex also wants to meet my gf, and I just know that similar questions would be asked. Either event would cause everything to come crashing down around me. I'm probably going to have to cut contact with my family and seek a new circle of friends, I'd rather do that than lose my gf.

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>>31194441
ow the edge

>>31194409
>>31194540
Shitty secret and taste in pokemon.

>>31192528
Well you capitalist third world pricks are savages anyway

>>31194580
Regardless of how good it is or is not, I just needed to get it off my chest. It's been tearing me up inside.

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>>31194577
Yeah I saw that one coming
In a thread where people admit to acts of vitriol, times they manipulated people, times they stole property, and other misdeeds I'm the edgelord for having an unpopular opinion.

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>>31192442
>I have an imaginary friend I talk to every day
Holy shit, I didn't think someone else here would be the same as me. Hello my negro.

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Celesteela
I want to fuck Milotic.

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>>31192442
me too

Latias
I want to fuck it

Electivire

My dad had a pedophile tied up and raped by a horse after the guy molested my cousin. He hung himself a short while later, and my dad was never found out. I only found out because I heard the guy screaming and I let my curiosity get the better of me. Since then I've been nervous around horses and my dad.

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Dusknoir
Bigfoot is real and he sucked my dick behind a 7/11[\spoiler]

>>31194841
Your dad is a good man

>>31192474
>Weirdly enough I grew to enjoy crossdressing
>Weirdly enough

:^)

>>31194689
The more you say shit like this, the more people are inclined to shout edgelord.
maybe you are the problem and the reason why nobody in your family tries to connect with you

>>31194540
you know there's nothing for them to be upset about if they know theyre the one you chose in the end. They might be a bit "what" about it, but telling the truth honestly makes the relationship stronger anyway. I'm not going to glorify you though, you are still shitty but I'd be somewhat of a hypocrite. My last bf was boring and actually we hardly talked and when we did he was a cunt, I fell in love with someone else during the same period of time and cheated. But you know what? I don't feel bad because I was going to dump his sorry ass for 3 months anyway. Im still with that current bf and he knows about it and all the confusion etc. Believe it or not you are human, just don't cheat on this one. If you ever actually feel like you need something else you have a discussion about it. You can go on a break, or she can at least understand the frustration youre feeling.

talking is the key to a mature relationship, even if it's the worst shit.

literally who the fuck cares, you cheated, its done - youre human and shit happens sometimes. You found something better and from my understanding its your current partner. Stop wallowing in self pity.

Also don't fucking do that to your family.
Iff anything goes wrong youll be crawling right back to them and expect them to welcome you back even though you mistreated the one set of people who care about you the most. Probably even more than your girlfriend. Get a fucking grip.

>>31194919
They try, but the problem is that we're fundamentally different people with different ideals. The only edgy thing about it is the fact that we're blood related. If I felt that way about anyone else then it'd be entirely normal, but since it's family I have to pretend I like people that I simply have little to nothing in common with.

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Cyndaquil

I used my cousin's feet to jerk off on multiple accounts

>>31192394
Before reading any of this thread I'm going to go ahead and guess everyone's secret will be of a sexually nature. Probably getting molested since that's how these threads usually go.

>>31194368
are you a girl

i need to know there are pervy girls out there

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>>31192394
Banette.
I'm so scared that I'm never going to get over someone that it'll affect the rest of my life. They're someone I haven't even met, yet I always feel lost during those periods of no contact. It's probably negatively affecting my mental and physical health but I just can't let go. I can't picture myself ever feeling this way about anyone.
I just want the pain to stop.

>>31194577
Do people not know what edgy means anymore? Feeling no connection to your family is not edgy, you faggot.

>>31194932
Thanks, I needed a bit of reality.

>>31195041
it does say darkest secret
idk what you would expect?

Sexual shit will be the majority, with all the various fetishes, experimentation and molestation.
Theft would be next and then--
maybe something violent, manipulation or someone being a sociopath, intelligent, nihilistic and with a wicked sense of humor.

There's not really many choices when it comes to the darkest secret, by process of elimination being molested will always be the most common one because people with shit or light hearted secrets generally won't bother posting. It's also most likely that the people who do say they're sociopaths etc probably actually are due to statistics.

>>31195062
feel you

>>31195000
Then do things with them and get common interests, it takes both parties to have a relationship and if they're trying you should too... fucking edge lord

Ninjask
I spanked/molested many cats and brush my genitals (underpant) in one when I had Ailurophobia

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>>31194095
>not the worst thing i ever did but
Please share anon

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>>31195192

>>31195229
What did you don't understand?

Bump for interest

>>31195018
go on...

>>31192438
I'm calling bullshit.

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Furret

ive had my own dick in my mouth

>>31195348
How was it? Some people say it's great, others say it's nothing special.

>>31195357
I didn't suck my self off, so I'm not really sure how that would feel. I lost all motivation once I realized I was able do it. It just sorta felt gay, so I stopped

>>31195348
How? I tried once but I ended up with sudden sharp pain in my chest that felt like I was stabbed.

>Cosmog
PEW_____________________________________________________________________________________________________

>>31195411
Natural flexibility, mixed with trying everyday. After a couple days I was flexible enough to reach it.

Also jeez man

>>31194339
Was she awake? Did she know? Did you do it to her? When you say "with my mother," does that mean she was also masturbating? I want more details.

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>>31195396
>It felt gay
Oh come on, Anon. I don't understand people who avoid things that feel (or could feel) pleasurable to avoid a stigma about sexuality no one is even going to find out about.

I can't wait for the person who genuinely believes touching your own dick is gay too.

>>31194441
same, actually. i feel like this is normal in a lot of cases.

>>31194300
Did you ever tell somebody

>>31195348
I have too, its not as good as guys think it might be.

>>31195411
I suppose it depends on the proportions of your body. If you have a short torso you should be able to do it easy, or a really big dick. Im not even skinny or have a big dick and i can still do it.

next time youre alone try for a few hours to get eased into it. lay on your back and put tour legs in the air and gradually get your legs further and further back behind your head. eventually youll be able to lick it. You have to build up the flexibility, if you do it immediately youll feel awful pains. But if you slowly lower/extend the legs past your head youll be able to do it. It just feels weird when you stop because youve been crunched up for a while.

Another way is by wedging yourself in a tight gap where you can push your back/head against something and slide your legs up the wall. After gaining flexibility you can just do this sitting down.

>>31195444
It felt gay meaning, as a straight man I can't continue doing it and feel pleasure. I would just keep going soft. Not avoiding a stigma, just don't enjoy it.

There's a difference between sucking your own dick and jerking off. While jerking off, you can imagine your hand is the girls mouth/vagina/ass/whateverthefuck

But while sucking yourself off, you can't really watch porn, and can't disconnect from the fact that you're sucking a dick

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>>31194095
This is the legit worst.

Out of all the other shit in this thread. This piss me off the most

>>31195046
there are. what are you, 14?

>>31195503
Well, alright, fair enough. Still, I do feel some jealousy that there are people out there who can do it, but choose not to.

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>>31194540
>cheating
One who plays with people hearts is a shit person to begin with.
You already did the sin, just live with the person you are now.

>>31195503
>But while sucking yourself off, you can't disconnect from the fact that you're sucking a dick
OMG

>>31195522
Indeed there are, they're just rare, in my personal experience, I only know one and she's already engaged.

>>31194540
you should tell them both and hope for the best.

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I like to take long walks in the middle of the night to get spooked

>>31194646
>It's been tearing me up inside
Good. Now you learn that your actions have consequences. Grow the fuck up and stop being a fuckwit.

>>31194101
how about now [\spoiler]

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Back in High School, I used to wear a lanyard that had a flashdrive on it, and on that flashdrive was a backup of my waifu folder.
I still have it lying around, and I eventually did use it. The oldest files I have on my computer are from the waifudrive.

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>>31195046
>need to know there are pervy girls out there
Have you not watch a porno before?

Girls are every bit as pervy as guys.
They don't talk about it because they are too busy fucking, unlike you.

>>31194540
>cutting ties with your family and friends for a girlfriend who you'll probably cheat on later

>>31192394
Arcanine
I recently became a furfag and I love jacking it to Pokeporn every chance I get.
Anthro, Feral, Male or Female. Especially Male Feral, I'm not gay, but for some reason that gets me hard like nothing else.I still can jack it to completely normal and average 3D porn, so I'm not entirely degenerate

>>31195617
>i'm not gay
sure you're not.

>>31192798
How would they even know to point the finger at you in the first place?
Give me details, man. I'm curious

>>31195632
It's not gay to fap to male every so often it's called experimenting fucktard

>>31194841
Your dad is fucking extreme, dude

>>31195654
>Especially Male
>for some reason that gets me hard like nothing else.
Your experiment results are that you're gay.

>>31195676
expect it doesn't I am perfectly straight thank you very much infact I bet I am more straight than you!

>>31195676
Thing is, I still get hard when looking at average female porn
Like, i actually have no fucking idea what's with me
Maybe I'm actually bisexual? Maybe I'm just severely fucked in the head
I dunno

>>31195703
It's a well know fact that furfags bisexual gay

>>31195703
>>31195632
Also, it's not like I even give a fuck if I'm gay or not
As long as no one I know finds out, I don't care

>>31194841
nathanexplosion.jpg

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Gengar
>Was in a relationship for 5 years
>met this girl from a broken family where they kick her out, and left to die
>I save her life and she been with me since
>Got badly sick, and needed my gf to take care of me
>After 6 mouths, my gf pretty much thought I was going to die, so her friends got her looking for a new bf
>Too sick to know what's going on, while she cheating on me
>One day her and her new bf come into my home, taking my shit.
>bf kicks me in the face, saying I can't do anything to stop them
>her new bf didn't know I used to weight lift and box everyday before I got sick
>running on nothing but adrenaline, I get up and proceed to beat his shit in
>kick him and her out of my house, while coughing up blood
>Nothing but rage to keep me going, I file a lawsuit and retaining order
>Got 5 grand from them
>Enough to help me care my sickness

It been a year.
I lost 80lbs, got a new job high paying job, and got a younger and prettier gf.
While my ex got into drugs, and lost her teeth.

And if this didn't happen, I would have been dead a year ago.
Who knew being cluck was a good thing.

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_________________Nothing_____________________________________

>>31195794
>and lost her teeth
How the fuck does that happen?

>>31195703
You know it's actually never black or white right? It's not actually a straight or gay thing, sexuality is a scale, you're maybe a bit gay or maybe only when it comes to fur, but who care about labels? Just enjoy being degenerate

>>31195894
I'm guessing that she probably became a meth-head, Anon.

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>>31195894
Drugs are a hell of a drug

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Clefable
I was raped when I was 14, and have lived in abusive homes all my life.

>>31195951
>>31195934
>Have this constant paranoia about anything bad happening to my teeth
>See this
Well, not like I had any plans to, but I'm definitely never touching meth in my fucking life.

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>>31195894
Forgot to say she got in a car crash with her new bf.

Also, she took my PS4 and all my Pokemon games.
Took me a long time to try to play pokemon again because it reminded me of her.
And piss me off the most, I lost my Shiny Gengar that I breaded to perfect IVs.

My Gengar bro is forever lost because of that whore.

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I've masturbated under a blanket in a full airplane cabin while both of the people sitting next to me were awake. I don't know that either noticed though.

>>31194261
>After that he would always get tard rage when he saw me in the halls but he was a retard so everyone thought he was just being him.
fucking lost

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>>31195976
>And piss me off the most, I lost my Shiny Gengar that I breaded to perfect IVs.
Shit, I can imagine the pain. I didn't breed a shiny one (I don't have the patience), but I personally went through the trouble of breeding a Gliscor with perfect IVs because he's my fav, and use him a lot more than a shiny one with perfect IVs that I got off of a giveaway here on /vp/ just because of the effort. I couldn't even picture losing him to an accident, much less some bitch taking it away.

Sorry, Anon.

>>31195976
That sucks dude, I admit that shiny Gengar is one of my least fav shinies, mega included, but still that's pretty sad.

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>>31196024
>>31196074
All I have is a pic for memories

Been hoping there was a Gengar giveaway, so I can get my bro back.
Don't really care if it's under my ID.
I don't have time to breed again, like when I was younger.

I remember this thing taking mt mouths to get.

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>>31196135
If you don't care about legitimacy, anon here would be willing to provide you with a substitute. No trainer should be without a Gengar

>>31196135
I guess I'll start breeding one actually, don't have a competitive one in Moon yet and if I do get a shiny one I'll give it to you I guess?

>>31196193
If you have one already fully train with 0 IVs in Attack, with the same egg moves. I'll take it.

And to show I'm legit, I'm using the same user name for my Pokemon Sun

>>31196234
Silly me, there are a fuckton of injectors, I'm not one because I'm too paranoid to hack my 3ds

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>>31192394
I'm more sexually attracted to my pillow than any real or 2D woman.

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Shuckle
I've masturbated in public.

>>31195513
Are you sure it didnt piss on you?

Garchomp
I'm addicted to picking and sniffing my earwax

>>31194932
Abby?

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>>31195794
Shit
This is something out of a movie.
Good that you didnt die anon, and gave that bitch hell

>>31195579
you seem cool anon, don't die on those walks

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>>31195794
These threads tend to be full of bullshit, but if this is true I'm proud of you, dude.

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>>31196249
What username, desu

0 Attack IVs, same moves as Gastly pic...nickname? Want Trainer ID on him? What level?
I can throw him on GTS but I'll wait until response in case of snipe.

>>31194932
>>31196325
Hello shiny hunt people

Do not become associated with Internet relationships

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>>31196388
Sweet, sure Gengar bro
My IGN: LordJumpMad ID 214585
You can make it the same as the Gastly.

Thanks, this will help me enjoy pokemon again.

>>31196380
I wish it wasn't true. I was living a nightmare.
I was depress and wanted to kill myself, but too fucking mad to be sad about it.

My body and mind ran on auto pilot for 10 months, focusing on nothing but my job and gym.
While wishing everyday I was dead, but still too mad to lay down and die.

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Me and my bestfriend fapped together (to each their own dick) in a hidden place only we knew existed, this happened many years ago and he most likely forgot about it. We're both not gay, the only difference is that he has a qt3.14 gf and is good at stuff while I'm a KV that never talks to girls, except for his gf when we all hang out together, and I'm also bad at everything I do, I always manage to fuck up in a way or another

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>was in 6th grade, 12 years old
>hanging out with my friend who I've known since we were four
>one day her brother starts lurking around her
>always looks pissed when he sees me
>fucker starts following me around even when I'm not with his sister, he even followed me home a couple times
>starts throwing stuff at me in school, breadcrumbs, banana peels, paper and even gum which landed in my hair, resulting in a shit haircut
>decide to secretly gather bags of dog shit in the basement after wallking our dog
>when over at friend's house tell her I need to use the restroom and hide the bags under her brother's bed
>do this for weeks
>about a month later the fucker found the source of his shit smelling room and of course blames me
>starts using me as his punching bag at school, forcing my friend away from me and touching me as well
>kick him in the balls as hard as possible every day and get a hit in the gut or chest in return most of the time
>it's worth it though, doesn't hurt much, I'm not gonna let that asshole have children
>one day our homeroom teacher made tea for everyone
>"oh shit that's hot can't drink it yet"
>go outside with tea
>notice the fuckhead approaching from behind
>turn around
>oh shit he's too close
>instinctively pour tea over him
>it's so hot he starts crying and runs back inside
>suffered second degree burns from the tea
>his parents try to sue me
>got away with it because I was underage and told them he beat me up every day while adding some fake details about it, saying sorry repeatedly and saying I didn't want to burn him all in a really shaky voice while faking tears

I don't lie often, but man do I love being a believable liar. Even years later this cracks me up.

Cubone
I regularly have intrusive thoughts about hurting or killing people that I know. They try to justify themselves by having the person hurt me or do something bad, but I always end up hurting them in ways that are way worse.

>>31196595
Why the fuck would a teacher make everyone tea?
Fucking hot tea no less

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spent the first 3 years of my life crossdressed as a girl because my dad wanted a daughter

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>>31196494
Sorry, took me a second.
Tell me what you put up on the GTS and ask for lvl 50 Gengar, I'll try to hurry.

>>31196704
It was cold outside and she was pretty much the nicest teacher there
also I live in a small town in germany so things are different here

>>31195046
No I'm a boy sorry to disappoint

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>>31196737
Lv 1 Female Cyndaquil in a Quickball

>>31192474
I want to bully you in bed with your sister.

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>>31196815
Fucked up the ID, but he does have the trainer name, at least. Have fun

>>31196766
While we didn't get tea, our english teacher to motivate people to get better gave us some sweets, that is if we did a good job in group assignments. Of course since I'm the only one that has decent english knowledge (imo at least, some people would say I have really good knowledge of the language) I didn't do jack shit so I got nothing, she must hate me because I never do homework and never pay attention. I'm in the wrong for sure but I don't really care since I always get the best grades.
Oh and of course english is not my first language, not the second either, it's the third

>>31196917
I'll take it
Thanks bro

I was bit 3+ times on the head by large dogs when I was younger, each leaving a big scar (the most visible one showing when I smile). As a result seeing dogs period, seeing them act like disobedient shits, or especially hearing them bark/whimper/beg causes my blood to boil. As a result I get this inner urge to shoot, strangle or beat them. I almost killed my dad's dog one weekend I was house sitting via strangulation before I was snapped out of my rage by the sound of her whimpering.

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>>31196979
Forgot pokemon

>>31194261
>After that he would always get tard rage when he saw me in the halls but he was a retard so everyone thought he was just being him.
My sides are fucking gone

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I stole all the first kisses from the girls in my first and second grade classes.
One girl was obsessed with me thinking that I was in love with her, she kept thinking that until middle school while i had no idea we were classmates.
she got heavily into drugs, pregnant three times, had two children (the third miscarried) and she writes long facebook posts about me while i have her blocked on all social media.
I'm 19 and gay but i've already ruined some girl's entire life

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>>31196595
>Love being a belieavable liar
HHMMMMMM
>>31197273
Damn, how do people come up with this stuff?

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>but i've already ruined some girl's entire life
I feel that
>Girl obsessed with me in high school
>Let her suck my dick and play pokemon with her
>She's super cute, but I know I'd be ridiculed if I dated her
>She stitched my name into her arm once and threatened suicide over me countless times
>One day just block her on everything and move away
>To this day feel really bad about doing this to an otherwise very sweet girl, consider taking her out somewhere nice to make up for it
>She suffered a huge breakdown after I left and is now an aromantic tranny who butchered her cute looks
>This isn't the only girl Ive done this to
Im an awful person aren't I?

>>31192394
>Marshtomp
I once runned my dick all over a cookie and watched as our family friends, daughter ate it

>>31196951
Is this level of humblebragging really necessary?

On topic,
I have a long history of sabotaging those "close" to me because I don't want them to succeed. Spiking drinks with laxatives before an important football game, and doing the same for another friend before the SAT. Making up stories for my friends to console me, knowing that they have big tests the next day, and so on. I'm a man, btw.

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>>31197581
Oh yeah, favorite pokemon.

My post got deleted

>>31197581
>Humblebrag
I guess I shouldn't have but I'm a good for nothing, except in English. Anyways, about your secret, why exactly didn't you want them to succeed? Were you jealous of their skill or did you just enjoy being a dickhead?

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I have a tulpa. It's a video game character. It's a furry. I'm a furry. It's how I sleep. Fuck.

>>31197704
They were all born into wealthier, better families than I, though our talents were relatively equal. I saw it as an evening of the playing field. I generally don't feel bad about it.

>>31192438
Average PopplioFan

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>>31192394
I'm into obese women

>>31197753
How fat are you?

Beedrill
girl bodies are nasty

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>>31192394
I just want to live my life as someone's cumdump in exchange for a roof and food. I'm too lazy to continue uni and too incompetent to do even simple jobs

>>31198069
If you're a girl that's easy

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I fucked a body pillow and got cum all over it

>>31198069
Are you a girl? Because if your a guy than that's probably never going to happen

>>31196621
>I regularly have intrusive thoughts about hurting or killing people that I know.
This is pretty normal, unfortunately.

>>31196714
Did that have any impact on your sexuality/whatever?

>>31198040
Not fat, just short. 5'5, 102 pounds last I measured.

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i feminized my boyfriend
Her new name is Zoey

>>31198069
If cute, then you might be able to get a decent arrangement with someone who's into that.
If not cute, then you have little chance of making it.
Also, you have to consider that just being a cumdump is not going to cut it, you'll also need to clean manage the place, while at the same time making sure you don't become a disgusting fatass.

I'd offer you to crash at my place, but I have my cousin living with me and she's not to friendly with others

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i had my first sexual experience when i was 13 in a bathroom stall in my old middle school with a girl who sucked my breasts while fingering me. it makes me aroused just thinking about it but i also wish it didn't happen at all.

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I spent a couple of years in high school plotting to kill my stepdad before going to a psych hospital. Turns out that I'm bipolar and suffer from psychosis and have some pretty strong homocidal and suicidal urges. I didn't want to be an edgelord.

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>>31198702
Holy fuck that's hot

>>31198798
>I didn't want to be an edgelord.
>fav mon is Absol
Are you at least a girl?

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>Alolan Ninetails
I think I accidentally raped a girl in college. She wanted to bang but blacked out and we did it in a staircase in the dorm.

>>31195990
I once masturbated in the back of a bus without anything to cover my dick and came in an empty bag of bake rolls

>>31198828
No, but I wanted to be one as a kid.

>>31198828
Is liking Absol a bad thing?
Asking for a friend.

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>>31194022
>verlis

>>31192528
Let me guess: It was because of Obama, wasn't it? Also, unless you're using a VPN or proxy, you can be (easily) traced back to, just so you know.

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Normally I'd post something about fetish related degeneracy that I'd rather keep in threads asking specifically about kinks, but something I try my best to keep in the back of my mind came up today

I tend to become verbally abusive when either some minor shit pisses me off when I'm under high stress or if I try to reason with someone about a better and or more time efficient way of doing something and they fail to understand or at the very least acknowledge whatever merit it may have. Thankfully, this next to never happens outside of immediate family, otherwise I'd be too much of an insufferable piece of shit to hold any kind of job for more than a week, but even so, no matter how convinced I am about how correct my way of thinking is at the time, it almost always escalates to threats of calling police or throwing my ass in a mental institution, and I always end up disgusted with myself to the point that I try to keep such events in the back of my mind until it inevitably happens again. Not even my worst enemies deserve to be under the fire of my autistic ranting

also, looking forward to the next kink thread when it happens, felt nice being able to get the most degenerative shit I'm into off of my chest even if it's done anonymously

Venusaur
I tried to kill myself on 3 separate occasions. Every night before I fall asleep on those 15 minutes before drifting, I think about the girls that rejected me, the highschool peers that I don't talk to anymore and all the others disappointments in my life. I'm a 22 KV

>>31194441
Kinda same. The only one I really connect to is my 6 year old lil sister. Everything else feels fake, I mean I care about them, but I dunno, it's hard to explain, feels like I have relations with them because of blood bonds, almost like a contractual obligation.

I don't think I ever really clicked with someone in my entire life

>>31198454
Please stop liking Ampharos so I don't have to feel bad for liking it too. You are a terrible monster in human form and need to be skinned alive.

>>31199011
>22
Stop being such a pussy and man the fuck up, life isn't easy and you have to put up with shit like this all the time. Those girls rejected you, sure, but you still got plenty of time and it's not like you'll get a gf without doing anything.

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I was raped by a foster kid when my parents took them in, and didn't tell anybody until I was 16 or so. I was 7 when it happened. I'm over it now, but I still don't like to be called by a nickname we shared.

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>>31192394
All my friends think I'm happy but truth is I'm a lonely fuck who just wants to be loved. Working on landing a relationship but I fear that the confidence goggles will only set me up for disappointment.

>>31199134
I dunno man, I just think I'm super undeveloped when it comes to social skills. I was very wirthdrawn as a kid, and my parents didn't let me out much and I have the same issue as this guy >>31198997 altough on a minor scale.

Also worth noting, I'm finishing college. Since I was finally free from my parents I took the chance to be more social, and I failed spectacularly, although surprisingly I managed to get a few friends.

I mostly approach girls that show some apparent interest, but out of the blue they stop talking, and I never get feedback of what I did wrong

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>>31192394
Golurk
>I came on my cousins panties when I was 12
I'm so fucked up

>>31192394
>Feraligatr
>I fap to traps and it makes me feel ashamed. Cure me of this degenerate fetish please

>>31198702
I can relate, except that I'm a guy.

>>31199180
Are you me? Well, sceptile isn't my fav mon but he is my fav gen 3 starter and I don't have confidence at all but the rest is the same as I feel

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>>31198347
While I was growing up I was that kid that could fit in anywhere at school, also ended up with a boyfriend and a girlfriend in the past but now I guess I'm suffering a bit of an identity crisis because I'm not quite sure what I want to be.

>>31194441
Wish I saw this before making my usual long-ass post so I could have commented on it there
Not asking this for the sake of validating my own view of the importance of family ties, but what drives people like your self that prefers to cut ties from family when possible, I can understand if you come from a particularly shitty family that gives zero fucks about you or how your mind works, but I feel keeping ties with family and a drive to better myself as a person are the main things that give me the will to live, so seeing people that would rather cut ties with their family outside of those that come from an abusive environment baffles me. I know I just went on about getting verbally abusive at times, but even in a frenzied state have I never considered getting physically violent, an argument isn't worth throwing my future away. I personally feel that my view of the importance of keeping ties with family comes out of my desire to want to reach a mutual understanding of the way others think

>>31199193
I'll be honest, I'm younger than you and I started following my own advice not too long ago, although my situation isn't as bad as yours. But still, seeing stuff like this reminds me of my former self so why not try to help motivate other people... I guess?

>>31199217
don't worry dude, things will get better for the both of us

>>31194841
Your dad is fucking radical

>>31199264
I don't really care enough for that. It bothers me sometimes because I see everyone around forming bonds so easily, it's like watching a different species, but other than that, I'm going completely numb

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>giratina
I nearly suffocated two seperate friends on two seperate occasions and I have no idea why. All of us are still very close friends as well.

Y'know, you guys are a bunch of sick sons of bitches.

>>31199251
Are you asking what drives people like me in general, or what drives me to disconnect from family?
The former: The people I actually appreciate in life and the probably illogical assumption that I can work my way out of any problem if I approach the right angle. I can see that other people consider family a vital part of their life, and I don't want to intrude on that, but I don't feel the same way.
The latter: Many of them represent values I'm against, have done bad things to other people, or are just unlikable for some other reason; it's simple as that. The difference between me and most people is that I judge my family members the same way I judge anyone; I don't give them a pass just because I'm expected to.

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I've fucked an animal

>>31199355
Do you know where you are?

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Ampharos
I had a gf for almost 3 years, and during that time, I always had fantasies of being fucked by guys.

>>31195794
Siiiiick

>>31199453
It's okay, Zoey

>>31199388
What kind of animal?
also: checked!

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>>31199193
Define minor, like does it never get to the point of scaring the shit out of loved ones and is just more of annoyance than anything that can be perceived as malicious?

>>31199387
Meant the will to live mainly, but I feel the disconnect bit explained it better for me, I understand wanting everyone to be judged on an equal basis, which leads to me actively resenting groups of people that I'd rather not bring up to avoid going into politics that refuse to see any middleground whatsoever that satisfies the most parties in a just way, but at the same time, I disagree with my immediate family on some things (appeals to logic or reason are at times unsuccessful for different reasons), but I don't have the heart to apply that level of judgmental thought to loved ones.

My darkest secret is that I never played any Pokemon game on console and only ever used emulators.
Not sure if I should feel superior to all of you for being a decent pure human being or inferior for not having any life experience.

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Gliscor

I regularly pick my nose and eat the stuff I get out of it in private. I got into it when I was 18. I'm into salty flavors and was pleased to find out mucus has that kind of flavor when I tried it out, so I haven't stopped years later
I once masturbated when I was on a school trip under the cover of my backpack in the bus as we were coming back from it. It took me about an hour and a half from a two hour trip, partly because I was nervous, so I'd often get close and then lose it. A girl was sitting next to me, but funnily enough, I was not into her so I didn't fap to her or anything. To this day I still wonder if it could be smelled through my clothing after the deed was done, but no one said anything. I just got back home and cleaned up.

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>Azumarill
I've already posted a different secret in another thread, so here's another.
I've attempted suicide multiple times since the Second Grade. Everytime I try I have more reason to do so.

>>31199601
If you really want to die, get a gun. If you can't get a gun, go into a small room and light a big enough fire that you don't die, but that it'll spread carbon dioxide into the room. Then, go to sleep. Or, fill a plastic bag filled with helium/nitrogen. Haven't tried these, or any form of suicide, but I heard this will be pretty painless.

>>31194043
>Sex and sexuality are easily one of the most practiced topics that still remain hugely taboo in public society
>Expects anything but most "dark secrets" to be anything but sexual
Yeah, really REALLY makes me think...

>>31199585
DUDE ARE YOU LITERALLY ME
I've been eating the hardened snot in my nose since I was 5

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>>31199708
On everything I said in my post, or just the mucophagia part? Either way, it's always interesting finding someone else who shares your same experiences. It's also kinda funny that I have no recollection of picking my nose when I was a kid, much less eating it, but I'm very much into it as an adult.

>>31199646
It's not because I fail, it's because I've chickened out. The only time I've gotten close was my first attempt, but a teacher stopped me.

Umbreon
Nosepicking

>>31199811
What was your first attempt?

>>31199565
The family dog (golden retriever i think)
Think I was around 12

>>31199870
I put my lunchbag over my head and attempted to suffocate myself. A few people close to me were egging me on. All my teacher did was lock me in a room.

>>31199585
>>31199708
>>31199830
I tend to pick my nose a lot in private and then smear it under my desk where it isn't visible. When some of it gets stuck under my nail I simply eat it. I don't even like the taste, it just kind of stuck with me since I was a kid, except I used to smear it on the walls and get yelled at by my parents which is why I started hiding it. I really want to stop but I can't, no matter how hard I try. Guess I've been doing it for too long.

>>31199975
>I tend to pick my nose a lot in private and then smear it under my desk where it isn't visible
Yeah, I used to do that too before I started eating the stuff. The convenience of doing the latter is too good. No evidence of it anywhere.

>>31199897
thats pretty fucked up, but who didn't do shit in puberty.... If it did not hurt the dog it's ok I guess....

>>31200061
The dog wasn't the one getting fucked

>>31199585
Been doing what you've been doing for my whole life.

>>31200088
Fucking what? So who was the male/female?

>>31200061
yeah puberty makes you do weird things
luckly no one was home

>>31200107
>male/female
Anon...

>>31200107
>male/female

TRIGGERED

>>31200117
>>31200146
I happen to be an omnisexual 16th century chinese warlord, Colonol Sanders. My prefered pronoun is M'lord. Fuck off with your male/female shit

>>31200187
Just saying, the sex could have been male/male. And I'd put my money on it.

>>31200187
Didn't realize I was in the comment section of a Filthy Frank Video. Don't you have to post dank memes somewhere?

>>31200117
>>31200146
>>31200107
>>31200210
The dog was a girl
I am a male ya weirdos

>>31200210
>male/male
does that mean the dog has two dicks or something?

>>31200187
It could be male. As a chinese warlord you must have known the term
"put you thing in a ching"!

>>31200228
Here, I'll make it easier on you: the sex was male ON male.

>>31200088
>>31200226
One of these is a lie.

>>31200267
The question is who...

>>31200247
>chinese warlord
>must be male
It's the year 2016 you CIS WHITE SCUM CHECK YOUR FUCKING PRIVILEGE

>>31200107
The terms are TOP and BOTTOM ya dingus

>>31195596
girls are indeed pervy but they don't actually do pervy stuff irl

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Y'all should visit /adv/ or your psychotherapist.

Be me, actually intelligent and gifted, but having severe depression, multiple personality disorders and other great mental illness that essentially destroyed my future. Studying now astrophysics, only thing what's left that keeps me happy besides my very few friends

>>31195062
Reading this post over, I realize that some of it wasn't even properly coherent. Lack of sleep lately has me fucked.

>>31192394
Hydreigon is the best Pokemon

I managed to not speak to a single person outside of 1 girl in Maths and lab partners in the whole of last semester (1St year semester 1)

>>31200974
You can always tell peolle are solely self diagnosed when they say they have multiple personalities. It's not even a real condition recognized by modern psychology.

>>31192442
This isn't such a weird thing. So many people do this, there's just a stigna against not aming your friend jesus or whatever else the geographically determined deity is.

>>31201604
I meant multiple _ personality disorders, that's why it is in plural. Not the actual MPD.

And nope, my parents and friends forced me to go there. So not self-diagnosed. I'm sorry.

>>31201731
Shirley Ardell Mason has been dead for almost a decade, anon

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Mawile

I have fapped to beastiality and at some point it was the only thing that could turn me on. At first I thought ''who cares, just fap to whatever turns you on'' but then I started to get more and more ashamed of this. I have now tried to move away from it and haven't fapped to it for months and hope I never will. I'm also bisexual and I wish I couldn't get turned on by the same gender. I honestly don't understand how straight people manage that, I wish I was a normalfag, I hate being so rotten and degenerate.

>>31201846
Why do you hate that you get turned on by the same gender? I'm sure you have nothing against gays, but I'd care to hear why you dislike the idea of being one yourself.

>>31201880
Religious reasons and yeah, I don't have anything against gays. It's none of my business and it doesn't make them people.

>>31201914
>It's none of my business and it doesn't make them people.
Ohviously meant it doesn't make them bad people. Fuck I'm going full retard

>>31199221
same man, it's terrible, constand "you're everywhere but nowhere" feeling

>>31193359
Literally the two furthest words from each other.

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When I was 18 my mother kicked me out of the house and I had to live on the streets. One time another hobbo tried to take my backpack with the few things I had left so I shank him repetedly with a knife. Don't know if I killed him or not, and I moved to another area just in case.

>>31201914
>>31201846
I can relate so much to this. I tried to ignore it but i just cant

>>31193332
7 years old kids do all sort of things so much that I would say that this didn't count. But I'm jelly.

>>31201914
>>31202071
This might not work for you two, but something I did to deprogram myself of my family's religion was to indulge in the things I was taught not to.
With my friends, I acted as the "Ultra gay and fabulous" guy, until it was just normal. It felt weird and unpleasant, especially since it was out of my personality to be so flamboyant, but having the idea of being gay become normalised helped so much.
Now I have a boyfriend and while I'm embarrassed to talk to my family about it, if they say anything negative, I'm also perfectly fine telling them to keep their damned opinions to themselves.

Scyther

I'm cheating on my girlfriend with her twin brother.

>>31202224
Odd question, but can you tell they're related from how they taste?

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>>31197581

You don't get to complain about anything anybody else does ever. You are cancer and I'm sorry you didn't end up as just a miscarriage.

I often legitimately wish somebody would kick off another world war. I don't care if I die, I just don't want to be bored.

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>>31197890
Me too anon, me too. and men

>>31192394
>Favorite Pokemon
Heracross

>Darkest secret
Too close to bump limit. Next thread I'll tell.

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I spent the last six years nearly of my life with a second personality stuck to me and I'm 19 in about 2 weeks time. Normally I'm a happy person where I try and make everyone feel good and shit like that. My other personality is this much more violent and extremely aggressive side of me, that could easily put somebody's life in harm and it nearly got 2 people killed.

My best friend from high school is the only person to know about it, I feel like telling my family would make the whole thing worse.

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>>31203098

>>31203154
kek

>>31203154
Not gonna lie, it's pretty much that.

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I go on /vp/

>>31201914

>religious reasons

If you hate yourself because of the religion you were born into and raised in tells you to do so, it may be time to break free from the brainwashing anon

>>31203526
He's probably already trying. Having been raised Catholic myself, it was very hard to free myself of it and took me years.

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Cutest Pokemon ever imo
I still don't know how to properly mop a floor. I always miss a spot

>>31203685
I have that same issue with cleaning in general, it's the worst when I accidentally drop glass ware and it shatters into a million pieces. This happened twice while I was studying because I kept a container that I ate out of on a table on the side that I leave things on while studying or doing a networking project and I had tiny shards of glass that I couldn't see on the floor for weeks.

>>31203685
You seem like a nice person.

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I am obsessed with dogs
Every night, I fantasize about being/becoming one

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I have a long one, I hope it's interesting enough.
I used to work for a company that helped adults with brain injuries integrate back into society (or at least be as productive and happy as possible)
I had just gotten my bachelors in Sociology/Anthropology, never had any work experience
An old friend referred me to the company, Immediately applied and was almost as quickly hired
Found out very quickly that they hire practically anyone that comes looking for a job, literally people off the street sometimes, regardless of education or experience
Worked in a small home with 7 adults with brain injuries (we called them "residents") and for the most part completely incompetent staff. The home could barely fit everyone inside and was hardly equipped to handle anyone with special needs. It was also ancient and infested with ants and rats
Residents were never properly taken care of. Many slept in their own piss and shit through all hours of the day. I once found a resident sleeping in his wheelchair in his room, and ants were crawling on his clothes and in his bed to get at bits of food
Surprise, management does nothing about the problem
We were given $200 a week for groceries by the company (so residents lived off of less than $30 each a week for food)
Co-workers were all lazy wrecks who had no control over their lives, and took satisfaction in controlling the resident's lives instead
I don't know how, but I stuck with this job for a year and a half trying to do good for these people, because god knows no one else is going to
I eventually left because I couldn't take ramming myself into a brick wall for no reason. I feel guilty all the time for leaving

Also, I raped that friend I mentioned

>>31203975
>Reads
"Oh wow anon, you seem like a really good person! It's so nice you wanted to do good for tho-"
>Last line
Fuck

>>31204024
This. I also keked hard

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I really don't care at all about my family, my uncle died in a accident, someone crashed into him when he was riding his motorcycle (I'm sure its the other way around), it ripped the legs off his body. My entire family was crying, my reaction was "Good riddance." fucker decided to forgo every security and drive in a motorcycle instead of in a car.

Seriously grow the fuck up he knew the risks and he took them.

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>>31194261
Houston, we have a problem
>This is Houston, what is your problem?
My sides have gone into orbit

>>31194402
What is that fetish?

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>>31192394
Zygarde
I'm a gigantic pussy that has to constantly keep up an act to seem like a normal person. I have many fears. Sometimes I can overcome them if it's for someone else.

>>31194402
What is it anon I have to know

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>>31195794
If this is true, you did a good fucking job anon. You put that roastie in her place

>>31196979
>>31196996
Damn that's rough, man or woman?

>>31196979
That's terrible. Don't hurt the innocent puppers that didn't bite you.

>>31192394
Gyarados
I've masturbated to fantasies involving my male classmates and teachers.
I attempted suicide due to college rejections.
It's been a year of college and I haven't made any friends and I probably won't.
I'm a messed up person.

>>31204679
>I've masturbated to fantasies involving my male classmates and teachers.
Has someone not? I mean, probably not male for everyone, but there's always that one classmate and that one teacher (or more).

>>31204123
I can feel the edge on this post

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>>31194787
are you my long lost twin

Empoleon
Even though I'm still a virgin I love to cam whore with guys and send nudes to them

>>31204771
Send me nudes, girl

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>>31198909
You can be my friend. No really. Wanna exchange contact info?

I love every Pokémon about the same.
That being said, I REALLY love quite a few.
I groped a friend in her sleep one night when I stayed the night. We were both in middle school. I regret it every single day, and really love and respect her. It's even worse that I hate rape and sexual violence of every degree. Some day I want to tell her what I did,but don't know if she'll ever look at me the same way. At the same time, I feel like I shouldn't put so much burden on myself, that I should just move on and protect her and others from letting it happen again.

>>31204817
I only do it with friends, I feel like it's training me for when I really have sex.

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No super dark secret or anything, but I've been on and off suicidal since I was about 10.

>>31204882
That's probably a good idea. If you do it with some random guy over the internet they could blackmail you with your pics.

>>31204391
>Usually fearful
>Sometimes summons strength when others need it
I can see why you like Zygarde, man.

>>31204771
I know a feel very similar to that. Sending pics is fun.

>>31198847
Oh.. Was it your first time ?

>>31204718
Thanks, anon. But it's creepy since I attended a boarding school with most of them and we're both guys. I identify as Bi but my fantasies disturb me.

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>>31203975
Woah man, that situation must've fucking sucked. If only I could know how you fee-
>Last line

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>>31205091
>my fantasies disturb me
Well, I can sort of understand where you're coming from. Still, like I say, I'm sure it's a pretty common thing, especially when you spend so much time with someone like in a boarding school.

And, as for the friends in college thing, do be careful. I won't be the kind to urge you to get friends, because I know it can be hard for some people or even seem pointless at times (me included). I also went for a year in college without making friends. While I managed that well, I also committed the mistake of attempting to completely isolate myself since my lack of friends made me think I could basically engage in a hermit-like lifestyle outside of going to class, even from sporadic human interaction. I ended up falling into constant minor psychoses after a couple of months, and if not for the fact that I switched schools, I don't even know what could have happened (I was later diagnosed with schizoid, where I found out the condition makes you particular vulnerable to psychosis episodes when under pronounced isolation).

Not saying you will do that. Just a warning to be careful, Anon. Stay strong, if that helps at all.

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>>31197890
Ayy, another fatfag, now I feel less shitty about myself. HOWEVER:

I had a cute second cousin. Didn't start hanging out with her (or her cool sister) until we were teenagers. She started chunking up, I kind of sped up the process because it was hot as hell (e.g. "oh, I'm not that hungry, why don't you have this extra ice cream, etc.) ended up fooling around on and off (no sex, just boob/belly shit). Tried to justify it mentally because she was adopted, but it still bothered me subconciously. Eventually we both just kind of drifted apart (she went to college, a year later I went to a different one), and the fooling around was probably a big part of that. We don't talk anymore. Last time I saw her she'd gotten pretty big. Had one of my most shameful faps that night. She ended up losing a ton of weight later, though, so good for her. I miss just being friends with her and her sister. Fuck puberty. I want to go back.

captcha: select all the food FUCK

>>31205091
>my fantasies disturb me
In what way? As in you have trouble facing the people you fantasize about when you need to speak to them, or in a "why the fuck does this even turn me on" kind of way, which I can relate to with some of the weirder shit that gets me going.

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I'm just a lazy fuck.

>>31203975
I know I shouldn't, but fucking kek

>>31195513
Nigga i was like 8 or 9

>>31197581
>before the SAT
Your a terrible person and you should continue liking tangrowth because its fucking great

>>31196340
awe thanks but ill probs be fine im a big guy about 6ft 3inches and i got to the gym so i have muscle also nothing really happens in my neighborhood but one time i was walking around 3 am and something ran pass me on the road and i was loud i don't know what it was but it was a good jump scare probably a cat or raccoon