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>Favorite pokemon >Age >Darkest secret

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Thread replies: 333
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>Favorite pokemon
>Age
>Darkest secret
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>>31051136
>Favorite Pokemon
Empoleon
>Age
23
>Darkest secret

I'm fucking terrified and unsure if I'll find a full-time job in the next few months and despite having a well paying part-time gig isn't enough to convince me otherwise.
>>
Eevee
27
I once masturbated to a YouTube video of a giraffe giving birth.
>>
>>31051189
That's not really a dark secret, it's more like a common fear.
>>
>>31051136
>Nihilego
>27
>I'm actually a girl!
>>
>>31051233
Would you have sex with one if you could?

And which?
>>
>>31051136
>Sigilyph
>22
> I work for Nintendo
>>
>>31051291
Do you have a nephew?
>>
>>31051136
Houndoom
23
I'm an alcoholic
>>
>>31051136
>cryogonal
>24
I once killed a guy who was drunk driving. I drove through an intersection and the guy ran the light, I rammed my car into his and his head got cleaved in fucking two from the car door getting smashed in, I was fine if a bit shocked. I also got off completely innocent, just some manslaughter charges, I wanted to plead guilty but my lawyer told me no.

It really is surprisingly easy to kill humans, it's the aftereffects that get you.
>>
>Kingler
>24
>I still have don't know what all pokemon are weak to and shit.
>>
>>31051136
Ninjask
22
I have an incurable scat/diaper fetish.>>31051189
>>
>Glaceon
>22
>I can't get off to anything but bestiality anymore
>>
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>Pic related
>20
>I have had sex with an animal
>>
>>31051136
>Favorite pokemon
Mimkyu.
>Age
19
>Darkest secret
When I was 17, I was manipulated into having cyber sex with a britbong and he made be pretend to suck his dick.
>>
>>31051136
>Tyrantrum
>23
>I had sex with my cousin when I was 13
>>
>>31051649
Not sure what's worse, your fav pokemon or your secret
>>
>Salazzle
>18
>I don't have any friends and I do nothing but shitpost/play vidya/jerk off to furry porn
>>
>>31051707
There's nothing wrong with his secret.
>>
>Meganium
>27
>I only listen to fan made Touhou music and Vocaloid stuff
>>
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>Volbeat
>28
>I still like to roleplay
>>
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>>31051136
>Snorlax
>28
>Manipulated this girl online for about 6 years into buying me shit on a regular basis. Vidya, plushies, anime figures, tenga cups, food, etc. all in promise we'd one day be together irl. I had no plans to, she was gross and her pussy was ugly.
>>
>>31051438
The OP said a secret, anon.
>>
>Starmie
>25
>
>>
>>31051136
>Scyther
>Lv22
>While comfortable in my masculinity, I have an incredible envy how most females manage to be relentlessly cute without even trying. If it was possible to switch back and forth with no repercussions for like cosplay purposes and to mess with friends, I probably would.
>>
>chandelure
>26
I do lots of drugs and fuck random Asian sluts that I find in my city's Asian ghetto. All my friends know this.
>>
>>31051781
You. Design characters. Now.
You'd be surprised.
>>
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>Silvally
>24
>I can only get off to feral pokeporn now
>>
>>31051849
Well only my parents and my best friend know about it
Pretty sure I would have been fired already if someone at work suspected it 2bh
>>
>sceptile
>18
>I've wanked it to anime for the past 5 years, and my collection is gigantic. when i try 3d i usually end up going back to 2d help im fucked
>>
>>31051935
Also, I couldn't really think of anything else
I have no weird fetishes and don't do anything illegal.
>>
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>Eevee
>23
>I used to write shitty Sonic fanfiction during my mid teens. None of it was good but I did interact with some nice people while doing it. The only thing I regret out of the whole thing is that I acted like a massive awkward knob towards them more often than not. But overall it was a nice experience that actually makes me appreciate good writing even more than I would have otherwise.
>>
>>31051937
One of us
One of us
>>
>>31051957
Are any of your OCs on the wiki?
>>
>>31051933
As it should be.
>>
>>31051970
I highly doubt it.
>>
This board is fucking ruined, holy shit
>>
>gengar
>27
I have an online persona of an emotionally abused runaway lesbian teenager that I've used to get money from suckers.I'm in love with on of my persona's best friends.
>>
>>31052028
Welcome to 4chan
Hows your first week newfig
>>
>>31051615
So why do you have it? Genuinely curious
>>
>>31051438
>tfw this is exactly me but 25 and borderline alchy
>>
>>31052034
You're in too deep. I'm taking you off the case.
>>
Charmeleon
21
I once made a girl cum through tickles
>>
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Chespin
20
I sometimes pretend to be one on kik and discord as a persona
>>
>>31052080
Well yeah I almost only drink on the weekends, but then it's a whole fucking load and I almost always go to work with a hangover on Monday
>>31052120
Did you tickle her pussy?
>>
>>31052157
no i mean actual tickles, granted she told me before that she was very sensitive but i didn't think she was THAT sensitive.
>>
>>31052149
I usually don't throw that word around but that's pretty autistic, m8
>>31052181
But why is it a secret? That's just a funny story you tell your m8s at the bar
>>
>>31052120
That's more of a proud accomplishment than a dark secret.
>>
>>31052216
I don't have very many secrets, its one of the things I haven't told anyone before yet. The only other thing I can think about is the time that I was kidnapped as a kid by a bunch of witches but that's it.
>>
>>31052261
>The only other thing I can think about is the time that I was kidnapped as a kid by a bunch of witches but that's it.
Run that by me again
>>
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>>31052261
>kidnapped as a kid by a bunch of witches

Go on.
>>
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>Arcanine
>23
>I did not attempt to beat the Elite 4 until Diamond version (Began with Blue version)
>>
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>>31052261
>The only other thing I can think about is the time that I was kidnapped as a kid by a bunch of witches but that's it.
>>
>>31052053
I'm no psychologist but I imagine it's related to the fact my parents got divorced while I was potty training. For whatever reason my toddler-psyche permanently associated diapers with comfort and safety.
>>
Gengar
23
I literally cannot be in a crowded area without breaking down due to how anti-social I am, since I've never had an actual conversation with anyone besides my family and close friends.
>>
>>31052286
>>31052290
>>31052305
I don't personally remember what happened back then, must've been traumatic or something as this was the second time in a year I was kidnapped, but my mom told me that a bunch of witches, you know loonies who believe in magic and all that bullshit, kidnapped me because I apparently had some sort of power that they saw in me or whatever. Mom called my uncle and he found me a an hour later at some house where they were doing some ritual or whatever. He took me back and we never heard from them again.
>>
>Arcanine
>24
I am on a 4-year-old relationship but I'm not even sure she's a keeperalso, we've never had sex (penetration) because I have an ejaculation problem
>>
Haxorous
19 (joined gen II though)
I am in multiple purely sexual relationships with high school juniors and seniors, and it's all legal, but they don't know about one another, and I'm afraid of what could happen if they talk
>>
>>31052346
>as this was the second time in a year I was kidnapped
Anon come on now
>>
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>>31052216
I'm one-hundred percent aware, fag, so don't worry about telling me.
>>
>>31052303
>tfw I couldn't beat the elite 4 in blue at first because I only had an overleveled Charizard with 4 fire moves
To be fair I was 6 at the time but holy shit Blue and Lance kicked my ass so many times
I started over and wiped the floor with them because I had a rather deent team of Blastoise, Nidoking (or Nidoqueen I can't really remember), Alakazam, Tauros (got lucky in the safari zone) and two fillers
>>
>>31052346
>we never heard from them again
It's probably because they finished their ritual
I hope you like having a dark power hidden inside you
>>
>>31052366
This one I remember and is honestly more believable than the witch story. Basically I was sleeping over at a friend's house, then in the morning they took me and their kids a few miles out of the city to some community home where we stayed for a few hours before the police showed up, like 10 fucking police cars at the same time and my mom showed up with them to pick me up. I've had a very interesting early childhood, believe me. After those two incidents things calmed down, cept for a few family issues but that's all.
>>31052402
I don't believe in that bullshit, I honestly think they wanted to convert to their magic bullshit but realized I was too autistic to understand what they were saying so they just gave up.
>>
>>31051136
>Chatot
>21
>I have tried to kill myself twice.
>>
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>Whimsicott
>23
>I am bulemic and still fat
>>
>>31052446
There's only 6 years left for the ritual to be complete, my liege.
There's nothing to be worried about.
>>
>>31052306
I..see.
Since this autistic topic is in full swing -I got hemorrhoids back when I was about six, seven. I can't remember whether it was my mom or dad, but to get it out of the way, they flunged a leftover diaper reserved for my younger sister on me and had me strafe about for like an hour before hot mess happened. I'm embarrassed to say the humiliation got me aroused.
>>
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>>31052306
Not the one who asked, but I was expecting some shit like "diperbeamlol" let alone any response opposed to the realistic one you just gave. For that, you're an ok guy, even with the gross fetish and all, anyway might as well get mine in since I wrote this post

>Serperior
>23
>I've released seed to nearly an entire regional dex of pokemon that have a nice looking vulva/backside, both presented at the same time works best for me
>>
Mightyena
20

When I was young, I stomped a cat to death
>>
>>31052261
>kidnapped by a bunch of witches as a kid
And you chose your first secret? It's story time anon, come sit on my lap.

Anyway
>23
>Mienshao
I am going to sell all my shit, use the money to travel as much of the world as possible next year, then when I run out of money I am going to become an hero
>>
>>31052509
** and it prevented me from using the toilet effectively.
>>
Scolipede
24
I have a massive spanking fetish. I never get off without at least thinking about it.
>>
>>31051449
Whoa. That's horryfing
>>
>>31052531
Why anon?
>>
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>>31052524
Kill yourself
>>
>>31052587
Wants to go out with a bang, I guess.
>>
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>>31051136
>Aipom
>20
I used to be really happy and optimistic, i really wanted to do my best to help everyone i met, and i used to believe that i could be friends with everyone, but after having to deal with a horrible group of normies, for the first time ever i feel real hate for someone, and i wish that person was dead right now,


That's not the fucked up part, i could have cucked this person, and i could have made his life miserable a while ago, but an old friend probably the best girl i have ever met in my life, gave me hope, made me happy and stopped my hate for a while


The thing is i haven't been able to see my friend recently, and all the hate is coming back, I really wish i could kill that person, i regret not taking that chance to cuck him, his gf is shit and right now everyone knows he is cheating on her, and even when i know that my friend is 10 times better than his gf and way more cute, a part of me really wants his gf too, im really trying to fight this feel but without my friend it is ry all of m this is the only way to win
>>
>>31052587
Because I hate being alive. My suicide note is going to read simpley "Ha, see ya losers, I found a way off this stinking rock."

>>31052602
Also yes, this. When I go out, I am going out hard and partying
>>
>>31052541
>>31052509
That sounds like hell for a child, anonymous.
Makes me less disgusted for you and more remorseful.
>>
>18
>silvally
>fucked my friends ex multiple times and have extremely disturbing dreams that make me question my sense of self and morals
>>
>Lucario
>21
>Pretty sure I'm getting obsessed with this girl I have a crush on, despite the fact that her treatment of me is probably toxic and I should cut ties
>>
Espeon
21

high school dropout / no job / sad panda / 4chan
people know the first 2 tho
>>
>>31052627
>writing that cliche edgy suicide letter
>not something like "brb gensokyo"
While I don't respect taking the easy way out, travelling the world before noring on helium is a fine idea.
Go nuts, man.

Maybe you'll even end up finding a new desire to live after all is said and done.
>>
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>Lists their favorite Pokemon
>Lists their age
>Lists an incredibly edgy and vague """"secret"""" that they think makes them appear to have a deep, dark background but in actuality makes everyone cringe.
>>
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>>31052346
>you know loonies who believe in magic and all that bullshit, kidnapped me because I apparently had some sort of power that they saw in me or whatever


Can i be your friend? i want to be there when you end up being some kind of harry potter chosen one guy on a journey to save a magic world

maybe your secret power had something to do with tickles and , so now i have a plot to make a hentai better than Rance
>>
>>31052448
>Chatot also
>24
>I use viagra to fuck my actual gf because i dont find her attractive at all. She is fat and greasy and has bad habits like lick my face and shit. Im with her cause I'm pretty much alone, all my classmates are whores and this girl really cares for me, which is why i make an effort.
>>
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>>31052709
>24
>Classmates
>>
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>>31051136
>Favorite pokemon
It's a running between Furret and now Cutiefly
Both have cute pink shinies.
>Age
21
>Darkest secret
Even being a guy I really love dressing in woman's clothing just because of how cute/sexy they are, I have a little stash starting of underwear (both pairs I've bought myself and left over from my ex after sexual encounters with her), a school girl outfit and a wool/cotton dress.
This isn't uncommon anymore but I'm not gay/bi, I just really love woman's clothing.
>>
>>31052690
This is /vp/, what do you expect? I'm honestly surprised noone revealed that he's underage yet
>>
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I'm pleasantly surprised this thread wasn't filled with clearly underage dickwads like >>31052690
>>
>>31051136
Bounsweet
23
I would choke my pet cat to near death each day for a week. I realised what I was doing was wrong so I began to pamper her and later give her away to someone better.
>>
>>31052706
well if you wanna be my friend that's okay, but i don't really have too much going on in my life. as for that magic bullshit, its best if you don't think too much about it. i mean, i don't even remember it myself, hell i didn't even know it happened til my mom mentioned it 4 years ago.
>>
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>>31052741
>This isn't uncommon anymore
>>
>>31052638
what are your dreams like?
>>
>>31052120
I'd believe it. Core muscles contracting in certain rhythms can sometimes lead to orgasm in females. Intense laughter can cause a lot of movement in core muscles.
>>
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>>31052773
Is it not with this day and age anon?
>>
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>>31052361
>People like this exist
>Meanwhile I've a 24-year-old kissless virgin
>>
>>31052774
They vary, but the ones that fuck with me the most involve me being terrified and unable to do anything, and the only dream where I raped someone made me sick to my stomach
>>
>Monferno
>27
I've been in an incestous relationship with my cousin since we were 11 but we couldn't tell anyone so a couple of years ago we left everything behind, moved to Australia and got married under a completely new name. We miss our family but we know that they will disown us if we ever told them about our relationship and we love each other too much to end it so we don't want to ever go back because we can't. She's pregnant and expecting in June.
>>
>>31052848
cute
>>
>Pic related (yes, both of them)
>28
>I want to die soon before I become the same alcoholic abusive shitfactory autist everyone else in my family is. I'm already picking up their bad habits like getting fired for threatening managers and shoving people in public just because it infuriates me to look at them. But I won't an hero, because if I'm going to throw my life away I might as well do something stupid but exciting, like empty the joint bank account we all share so that dad can more easily leech off of our paychecks, and then run away to LA or something.
>>
>>31052848
that's cute
>>
>>31052732
It's possible.
>>31052709
You're doing it for love, then? Good luck to you. You know someone who cares that much - don't let go.
>>
>Eevee
>20
>I used to draw a lot but now the only thing I draw is Pokémon giving live birth to their babies
>>
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Why the fuck are you all so edgy? Why cant you have normal secrets like fapping to degenerate porn like futa or maybe sniffing your sister's underwear? Lighten up a little. Jesus.
>>
>>31052888
>live birth
Absolutely disgusting. Eggs or get out.
>>
>>31052888
Post your FA.
>>
>>31052897
Because we all feel the need to impress each other and the only way we know how to do that is share the most fucked up thing about us even if its a lie.

Just like real life.
>>
>Mothim
>21
>I stalk people online so much. I'll type the names of people I meet on forums or chatrooms and look them up for years on end. It's my biggest hobby.
>>
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Absol
20
Absol is my waifu and I can only really get off to her, everything else just feels kind of boring.
I occasionally fantasize about marrying an absol and living happily with her and somehow having kids with her.
>>
>>31052897
>sniffing your sister's underwear
>normal
>>
>>31052709

>tfw friend pours her heart to me about >tfw no boyfriend and how she's lonely and has no sex
>offers date
>"ha ha anon that's cute"
>i'm serious
>"oh well i'm not really interested"

How the fuck people can't realize their luck is beyond me.
>>
>>31052941
Normal compared to shit like beating animals, lying about doing edgy shit, or crawling up a live woman's uterus.
>>
Mawile
40
I fucked over 50 prostitutes
>>
>>31051136
>Feraligatr
>23
I'm heading towards an addiction to traps and futas and I'm trying my damndest to kick it.
>>
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>pic related
>22, almost 23
>[Spoiler]At the risk of sounding self diagnose-y or edgy, I basically feel like I'm becoming disconnected from the world and slowly becoming unstable. I get that deja-vu feeling a lot. Like I'll be having a conversation, a conversation with very specific subjects, unique situations, and distinct things being said, and I absolutely know that it's happened before. I also am starting to feel very alienated from my friends. They barely feel like my friends anymore. I just regurgitate what ever phrases they say and they still like me.[/spoiler]
>>
>>31052961
do you have superaids?
>>
>>31052897
2016 has been a depressing year and I'm not just talking /pol/ish
>>31052866
Scytherbro from earlier here
Regardless of whatever you do, you're trying to not be the same jerk as everyone else. Good luck in LA.
>>31052741
I would never go out in it but I have a sister that let me try stuff a couple times for the lulz while we were planning cosplay stuff and I gotta say why is it allowed to be so comfortable and guys stuff sucks in comparison
And at the same time why do girls never get real pockets
CAN WE GET STUFF THAT FEELS NICE AND HAS POCKETS FOR EVERYONE PLEASE
>>
>>31052901

Eggs just don't do it well for me. Nothing I like more than seeing a 9 month pregnant Gardevoir struggling while she has a Ralts lodged in her vagina

>>31052906

I'm too autistically shy Anon
>>
>>31052988
you're probably jumping timelines by accident, bro
>>
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>>31052988
>>
>>31052990
nah i went to a knocking shop and used protection. never pick up a street hooker.
>>
>>31051136
>Zorua
>18
>im a furry
Fuck you, Newgrounds.
>>
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>>31052988
Same
>>31051136
Sylveon
23
I have a gf I love very much, but she's had 1 one male and 2 female sexual partners before me. meanwhile, I've had one if you count 3rd base. Ive become increasingly sexually frustrated and thought about fucking exs or prostitutes when I travel overseas. I dont want to hurt her, but Im an awful person.
>>
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>>31051136
Porygon-Z
20
I regularly have sex with my cousin. Been doing it for 5 years.
>>
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>>31052997
Same here anon, I wouldn't be caught dead wearing it even in my own home, and last time when I was younger, my parents found a few panties and bras I got from my ex they didn't question it too hard besides why they were crusty too.
Besides from that the dress I got from work is so damn warm and comfy to wear but has barely an excuse for pockets but it beats the hell out of sitting around in cock hugging jeans I adjust every 5 seconds.
>>
>>31053036
>Be at in college apartment one night
>Cousin I had a crush on when I was younger in town and extremely drunk
>Says she wants to fuck my brains out and always thought I was hot. Says she'll let me do whatever I want to her if I let her indulge a bit in her piss fetish
Chicken out I sorta envy you mate.
>>
>>31053046
If you want to spoiler, use ctrl+s
>>
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>>31051291
Is it hard to get a job there?
Do you work at making games? Yes/no?
>>
>Heracross
>26
>My grandmother who lived with us until her death molested me daily until I was 10 or 11 and got a UTI from it. As a result I can't stomach foreplay, making out, petting, hair stroking, or any other gentle touches. I'll probably be a virgin until my mother dies and I can get proper therapy, because to her my grandmother walked on water and did everything for us, and it would crush her to find out the truth. I can't do that to her after everything she's been through and everything she's done for me.

Fuck, why can't I get the spoilers to work.
>>
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>>31052933
...I used to do this with crushes but that was like middle school-early high school.
I mean, I guess as long as you never DO anything, it's not as bad, just... Watch yourself. Don't do anything stupid. I worry about you /vp/oreons sometimes.
>>31052988
I dealt with that for a while. Still do sometimes.
One of the good things about it is you get an extra layer of thoughtfulness.
I held on to a promise I made to someone for 3 years as a result - and finally delivered when I got the chance. You become the chronicler of your circle's in-jokes. You learn these little things about everyone and try harder than anyone to remember them.
Your power will only grow from here, Chronicler.
>>
Why do all the secrets have to be about sex?
>>
>>31053097
Shut the fuck up or i'll suck your dick, faggot.
>>
>26
>Nihilego
>I lost my "virginity" at the age of 11 in a threesome. Had loads of gay shota experiences, with my brother, his friends and in general nearly every male friend I ever had. This was all before I was 14. The funny thing is I don't find it horrible, in fact it was fucking amazing. I mean actually the whole brother thing could have been left out desu (it's just weird now that he's 28 and ugly now).
>>
>>31053079
Holy fuck
>>
>>31053097
It's the most common taboo shared across many different cultural and ethnic backgrounds.
>>
>>31053097
DEEP DARK FANTASY and all that shit
>>
>>31052933
are you me? I fucking love this. Names, friends, locations, pics, naked photos. Fucking love this shit.
>>
Pro tip for retard:
Use ctrl+s to open a spoiler tag in the reply box
>>
>>31053113
>tfw can't go anywhere without being reminded that everyone else has had sex
>>
>>31053132
thanks
>>
>>31053007

It'd be more like I'm stuck in a long ass time loop or have really spotty premonitions in my dreams.

The most likely answer is I'm nuts though. I wouldn't be surprised.
>>
>>31053135
Regardless of what you hear and feel, a lot of people have it later in life. Mine was at 22, thought I was never gonna lose it. Pro-tip alcohol and telling good jokes are key.
>>
>>31053049
we should probably stop because this has taken up enough of the thread already but
What's nice especially this time of year is some knee high or higher socks, worn under pants
The world will never know, and it's not technically a female only thing, especially if you're wearing boots or spent hint that day
>>
>>31052988
You need to let Suzuha go to 1975, dude.
>>
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>>31053135
>tfw can't stand listening to people bitch about being virgins
You have the option, you're just too beta to do anything about it. It's not like you're fucking scarred for life because a wrinkly old vaseline-smelling family member made you suck on his hairy fingers every Christmas when you were little, asshole.
>>
>>31053186
I'm 24, have never come close. Alcohol only makes me tired and dopey.
>>
>>31053079
I think you should tell your mother the truth. it's way easier said than done but she should know who your grandmother really is and get you the help you need.
>>
>>31053079
welp, there goes my last shred of innocence
>>
>>31053187
Or something*
Wth autocorrect
>>
>Pic
>20

I have heard from others down the line that other girls have liked me in high school

I am an oblivious fuck who has never kissed a girl on the lips. I'm a functioning memeber of society/pretty normieish overall person with no friends. I'm built as a pretty tall average guy who volunteers a lot so I'm doing something so I look like a bettering person than I am for just trying to get out of the house or a lie when I need to be somewhere
>>
>>31053200
Well you must have turned out okay. I can't not be beta. Around girls my mind draws a blank. Even online I can barely keep their attention.
>>
>>31052120
Well I had my gf get wet multiple times from tickling her neck. I guess that's a thing among women.
>>
>>31052988
This is depersonalization disorder.
It's actually the exact description for monks reaching Nirvana, but you get to do it without trying hard. I do it too, you sort of understand how people work too well and I hate coming off as some special snowflake self diagnosed with "sociopath" symptoms. But that's literally what it is. Sometimes though, if I get too lost in thought I feel like my mind leaves my body and I become a new temporarily immortal entity that hovers over the world. It's similar to a baby being connected to an umbilical cord, as if our mind is actually attached to a long string of energy that goes up into a higher plane. You can sort of release your soul into it and travel up the cord. This is retarded to read, but it's a pretty cool experience.

Not to be cliche but I found someone I'm madly in love with 3 years ago and I've never had these problems. Not to that extent, at least.
>>
>>31053256
Almost forgot

I can talk to people/work together but never go anywhere with someone

/blog

Here's second favorite for cute and fluffy
>>
>>31053187
I did that once at work before and no one was the wiser.
And not like others aren't going on and on about shit anyway but oh well.
>>
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>>31053268
>my gf

STOOOOPPPP
>>
>>31051136
>absol
>20
>i crippled 2 puppies with my bare hands when i was 6
>>
>>31053260
Cry me a fucking river you twink.
>>
>>31051937
r u me ?
>>
>>31053299
Want to switch problems?
>>
>>31053297
Were you hugging too hard?
>>
>>31053296
are you that same guy who kept on REEEEEing last time we had a thread like this over people posting confessions related to sex?
>>
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23

I have only had sex two times
>>
>>31053221
I can't, dude. She's sick as fuck now and has barely any will to live as it is. If she somehow finds out she'll either go nuts from denial, disown me, or her depression will get worse. Either way I'm reasonably afraid it'd kill her faster. She doesn't deserve that.
>>
>>31052531
that is a good way to go anon, enjoy the trip
>>
>>31053331
>only

>>31053337
Not the other anons.....

But you only have to wait a little

She would never disown you for something that wasn't your fault though
>>
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>>31053058
>cousin is a lesbo fat
>claims to have sex with because apparently even lesbians need a dick from time to time
>constantly mocks my dick size (it's pretty small)
>her pussy is hairyand actually disgusting
>we don't hug, kiss, or touch because that'd be weird (oh the irony)
>can last an eternity with blowjobs but cum in 30 seconds when inside of her
It's pretty depressing. It honestly feels worse than the instant regret you get when you finish jacking off, but I still do it every time she reaches my dick.
>>
>>31053313
no, they were my dad's pups and he abused me so i took it out on them. i wound up breaking both of their hind legs, i think.
>>
>>31053337
oh, I thought you meant that she wasn't going to die anytime soon and that you'd have to wait. in that case yeah, I wouldn't tell her. What's stopping you from getting therapy right now?
>>
Torkoal
24
I've had a tulpa for 9 years now
>>
>>31053328
Most likely.
>>
>>31052524
What the fuck drives people to hurt other people or even animals? I will never understand that.
>>
>>31053337
It's not worth it if you can take bottling it up. It's an unfair thing but it can really hurt other people and completely derail them. However, I think that if you have someone else close to you it might help to talk to them about it. It's easy doing it on an anonymous board, but I find that once you tell people IRL who are close or intimate with you, being properly accepted and understood without criticism or backlash can really help.
>>
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>>31053312
>females suddenly have mild disinterest in my self-inflicted insecurities
>you get a lifetime of rape and molestation that make you vomit at certain smells and a powerful urge to avoid anything sexual to the point where porn might as well be gore
Where do I sign?
>>
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>>31053331
>only

A BLOO BLOO BLOO

I'll be a wizard in six years.
>>
Houndoom
23
I've jerked off to the memory of being beaten by my step dad more than once. Apparently all it takes is one belting and you're a painslut for life.
>>
>>31053388
Fucking this

I personally would find it harder to kill an animal harder than a human

Like these are things that can feel, how does it make you a better person.

I love Pokémon so god damn much because it lets me have all the exotic pets I could never have
>>
>>31051136
Is anyone else just a lonely closet robot?
>>
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25, Pikachu, raped my housemate at uni
>>
>>31052690
Such as? I haven't seen a cringeworthy one yet.
>>
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Shuckle
18
Other then having no faith in my future I have masterbated in public and the first time I masterbated it was from imagining vore. Also I pick my nose.
>>
>>31053417
>closet

I can't hide my awkwardness. I try to be nice and can sometimes make people laught but there's always a disconnect.
>>
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>>31053368
I'm more worried she'd be so unable to handle the news that she'd make herself think I was lying and disown me for making up something so awful for attention.

>>31053375
Money, mostly. And the fact that I have this habit of telling her where I am at all times because we live in a bad neighborhood. And I just CAN'T lie to her. I don't have it in me.

>>31053391
The thing about that is that people IRL don't know what to do when they encounter a situation like that. Most of my friends pretend I never brought it up. One guy who had a similar past suggested we try to "work it out together" and tried to roofie me that night. So I'd rather go to a pro.
>>
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>>31052732
>tfw failed so many classes I might actually graduate at 25-26
>>
>>31053434
>One guy who had a similar past suggested we try to "work it out together" and tried to roofie me that night.
If that guy is still your friend, he shouldn't be.
>>
>>31053432
Well pretty much. Just a very awkward forgetful and clumsy but kind guy
>>
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>>31052773
>year 2017 minus 4 days
>browses 4chimp
>isn't aware of the sudden LGBT boom
>>
>>31053434
>Implying he didn't roofie you to try out hypnosis therapy
>>
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>>31053260
>Fuck people that had a shitty upbringing, my social awkwardness is something beyond my control
As someone clinically diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome that has become a functioning member of society through years of therapy, I don't give a flying fuck what you have or believe that you have and haven't gotten properly diagnosed and medicated, I have held a part time job for the past six months and I have about two semesters left in college for a major in informatics. Prior to starting my part time job, I have struggled internally with thoughts of if I was just wasting my time continuing college after fucking up computer science and have many times have just thought of resigning outright and just trying to work retail my whole life, and even then, I doubted that I'd be competent enough to even hold a job of that level. Thankfully, the past six months have debunked most of my insecurities of my own competence in anything and I have felt more confident in the past six months than I have felt the past four years. If "waaa I'm too much of an insecure bitchboi to talk to people"
is really the most of your problems, I unironically suggest offing yourself and doing the rest of society a favor, I deeply resent every self absorbed twat from your generation that thinks everything should be handed to them, not only have people like you taught me what it means to hate, your kind has done harm to the LGBT community that will take years to recover.

TL;DR: Either try to better yourself as a human being or fucking neck yourself
>>
>>31053358
Thanks anon :) I very much intend to
>>
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>>31051136
>25
>Venusaur
I haven't had my first kiss. Not because I couln't get a guy to kiss me, but because I'm too scared that I wouldn't know how to do it.
>>
>>31053466
I forgot to put this in the original post due to how infuriated your bullshit made me, but I'd be capable of getting in a relationship if I put some serious thought into it, but I couldn't live with myself if I ever had to raise a piece of shit like yourself
>>
>>31053422
why?
>>
25

Cleffa

my drug addict step sister in Mexico is dating the village drug cartel leader. He's beaten the fuck out of her, threatened to kill her and her son, and held her for ransom multiple times because she can't stop using the product. My dad (her dad) doesn't know how bad it is; she called crying a few days ago asking for money to leave the village and stay with relatives, but none of our relatives will welcome her because she's accused them of lying, robbed them, cost them their jobs, and/or they're scared of her.

I really don't give a fuck, she only calls when she needs money; same with her spoiled, entitled son. Only feel bad because my dad will probably be depressed if she's murdered, and even worse, not being able to see her because of her involvement with the drug cartel.
>>
>>31053466
>not only have people like you taught me what it means to hate, your kind has done harm to the LGBT community that will take years to recover.

lolwut
>>
>>31053028
That's fucked up.
>>
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>>31053445
I broke two of his fingers so we kinda figured we were even and he doesn't make moves on me anymore. I still hang out with people who've done way worse than that, as long as you get your eye for an eye you can stay civil with people.
>>
>>31053482
that's adorable, I wish I could give you a hug and a pat on the head
>>
>>31053482
It's domething in life you just got to say "fuck it" too

It makes funny stories
>>
>>31053494
Ah right, forgot this site is global and not everyone lives in the shitshow of a country that is currently the US
>>
>>31053482
Most guys want inexperienced girls. Nobody cares if a girl is a bad kisser; mem are expected to take the lead.
>>
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>>31053432
good to know I'm not all that alone
>>
>>31053509
How have tfwnogf virgins made life worse for gays?
>>
>>31052690
>pushing your presumptions this hard
>actually being so deluded in trying to impress anonymous people that you've taken on the trend of calling everything edgy and deep
>not knowing that this is actually shit that happens to everyone around you, probably the best friends you dont have, and they're the same fucked up messes who won't talk to you about shit for this exact reason.

Autism in a post.
Quite possibly the edgiest post in the whole thread.
>>
>>31053491
Drunk, we'd had sex before, she was saying no half heartedly. We've never talked about it since, I don't know if she'd even use the word rape, she doesn't strike me as the kind of person who's very educated about consent sadly
>>
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>>31053494
>>
>>31053539
>she doesn't strike me as the kind of person who's very educated about consent sadly

HA HE RAPED A RETARDED GIRL
>>
>>31053503
Your moral code is very different to mine. What sort of town do you live in?
>>
>>31053548
retards have fat butts sometimes

just look at Rikka
>>
>>31053548
Wow, I love posting on addicting and funny 4chan.
>>
Fav mon: Breloom

Age: 28

Darkest secret: I have 0 friends, IRL or online. I'm seeing a psych for a few different reasons, and I'm lying to them about having friends because I'm so ashamed of it. I lie to everyone about meaningless little things to cover myself, and I'm scared that I'm digging too deep and won't be able to fix it.
>>
>>31053542
>I have assburgers and low self-esteem but I'm improving, your problems aren't as bad
>Your existence therefore makes life hard for gays
>>
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>>31053553
I grew up in Detroit but I currently work in Newark and live just on the outskirts of it. I don't think that has much to do with it though. It's just that after being treated a certain way by people you're intrinsically supposed to love and trust you learn to be more forgiving of non-blood fuckers for small offenses like *attempted* drugging and a broken finger.
>>
>>31053574
Don't lie to your shrink. If you do, it makes seeing them pointless.
>>
>>31053574
Brah

Those are the people who you tell that too

Family lies is one thing but already being in the psych ward is another thing
>>
>>31053577
>>
>>31053590
Yeah, I think it has a lot to do with where you live and the sort of people you're surrounded by. Unlucky I guess.
>>
>>31053574
that's the last person you should be lying to

what do you do? work, school, NEET? I'll be your friend if you want.
>>
>>31053604
Alright, explain the connection.
>>
>>31051660
Did this make you wanna suck real dick or have you strayed away from dick all together?
>>
>>31053384
Go on?
>>
>>31053574
I know how you feel. My only "friend" is a basement dwelling actual autist who basically only plays SSBM and goes online. I have acquaintances but I spend my time alone. People don't like me, they tell me sometimes, and I just try to make due.

At night when I'm in bed I imagine I have real friends, ones who are similar to me, and I have "conversations" with them. This can last for hours. I've never told anyone that, not even my therapist.
>>
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>>31053618
I mean aside from the fact that you're STILL cherry picking and obsessing over disproving this one point that will somehow nullify the fact that you're a useless betafag with no concept of empathy or basic reasoning, I have a folder full of these.
>>31053509
>>
>>31053644
I'm just failing to see the connection between "my kind" and LGBT, rehardless of neing American or not. It seemed like a non sequitur.
>>
>>31051136
>favorite mon
Absol because its CUTE
>age
21
>darkest secret
ever since i was 6 i was put on psychotropic meds and they were never right for me so i spazzed out a lot and ended up in a lot of mental institutions where i was abused and put on experimental drugs like a labrat. some of the shit fucked up my brain a bit. saw tons of horrible shit in places like those, kids who were wards of the state and had nobody to care for them were beaten by staff and literally thrown in cages and when one wasnt responding to antipsychotics like they wanted they gave him a lobotomy and he came out a fucking vegetable basically. in the middle 2000s. a fucking lobotomy. tons of kids in these places got sexually assaulted, myself included, and none of us could ever really do anything about it, since it was the word of crazies against the wonderful prestigious staff. i havent had to deal with these places for half a decade, but i feel like killing myself every fucking day and im too scared to ask for help about it because i dont wanna end up on drugs again or in a place like that. haha its all good though right at least im not black right haha
>>
>>31053511
This. not sure why but its halal otherwise.
>>
>>31052669
Good taste anon.
Espeon
22
College dropout/no job that's maybe going to go back, putting way top much faith in my abilitiy to get this business of mine off the ground.

I struggle with the faith of my parents, that I want to believe, but I want to know for real, rather than pretend, and it's hurting my mother in particular and I'd do whatever I could to make her happy.
>>
>>31053639
if you live in SoCal, I'm up for some beers or sushi or meeting up at a con
>>
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>Delphox
>27
I have an incredible disposition as towards socializing with other people, my mother ran over my dog when I was a teenager and I haven't been the same since. It seemed as though nobody understood exactly how I felt about what had happened and how it affected me, therapists have leaked all of my conversations with them to my parents in the past and they've beaten me for it. So I avoid going, even though I don't see them anymore.
>>
>>31053618
I already know there is no use in reasoning with people like yourself, but your response to >>31053200 is written in such a way that screams to anyone with a mind that functions to an acceptable degree that it was written by someone of the Snowflake Generation by the fact that you brought up your problems with speaking women like they were more important than actual fucking issues that would need years of therapy to prevent an individual from going completely fucking mental. Including a screen of your comment because I already know you are going to delete it to try to save face.
>>
>>31053644
Not him, but I want some more of these for emergency purposes.
>>
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>Fav poke
Garchomp
>Age
28

>Darkest secret
I studied law because the AA franchise inspired me I actually enjoy my profession and l'm really good at it but l still feel kinda stupid that a game influenced one of my life choices
>>
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>Sableye
>22
Kinda like this guy >>31053574. I haven't had any friends in years, I had a falling out with the only person who still kind of considered me a friend and I'm too awkward to make any new ones. I still tell people that I have plenty of friends even though it's not true. It's gotten to the point where I can barely talk to people without making a huge fool of myself because I just don't know how to interact with anyone.

I'm extremely lonely, and the only reason I haven't killed myself is because death is the only thing I'm more scared of than being alone forever
>>
>>31053574
>>31053639
I also relate.
>>
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>>31053608
Nah, some of these fuckers are the best support system I could ever hope for short of actual therapy. Broken fingers is one of the 2 or 3 people I can regularly vent to and have them vent back at me without me getting annoyed after a few minutes.
>>
>>31052848
I wish you only the best, incestual love is one of the strongest forms of love and I think its terrible how people are persectuted over it. I'm sure your baby will be beautiful, as will your life onii-chan.
>>
>>31053422
What the fuck man
>>
>>31053694
>someone actually wants to make friends with these losers
lmaoing @ you senpai
I wish I lived near you and make a friend
>>
>>31053694
If only, live in Chicago and hate it. Want to move but my immediate family is here and I can't leave them.

You sound like a cool guy anon, stay strong.
>>
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>>31053702
I got you anon, stand by for Imgur dump.
>>
>>31053494
I tried making sense of how any of this relates to LGBT oppression or some kind of harm to it, but I honestly can't. I got as far as thinking you meant that the "weak" people in the LGBT community have done nothing to help it, but I don't know how that becomes the other anons problem because they're straight. SO using the same line of thought, are you saying that weak straight people are the cause of years of LGBT oppression or something?

I don't get it, I don't get how straight men who are scared of sex have anything to do with LGBT oppression or harm.
>>
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>>31053702
>>31053702
http://imgur.com/a/u9E5j
Enjoy.
>>
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Butterfree
20
Even tho I'm a stand up comedian, I'm the smiley fat guy of the group and I'm young and full of possibilities I have no doubt in my mind I'll kill myself before the age of 25. The only reason I haven't done it yet is because I don't wanna put my family though the pain of losing me.
>>
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>Luxray
>21
>I breed my favorite Pokemon as female if possible so I can fantasize about having sex with them, I need help
>>
>>31053788
You're a godsend
>>
>>31053792
What's this phenomenon with comedians and depression?
>>
>>31053776
Shut the fuck up already. Do you not get by now that the 8 or 9 rape victims in this thread are sick of hearing about how you can't get laid? We know you're just circlejerking this one point to try and distract from that little fucking detail. Your insistence on being validated actually puts you at high potential to become the next disgusting 30 year old single sad fuckwad making your niece touch your dick in your parents' bathroom because you're a virgin and you're entitled to SOME kind of attention from a female.
>>
>>31053798
I'm very particular about the genders of my Pokemon. Unless it's distinctly feminine-looking, it HAS to be male. Even gender-neutral stuff like Mimikyu, of which I hatched two female with the right IV spread before getting a male.

>>31053776
Not scared of sex itself, just women.
>>
>>31053834
This is really bad bait
>>
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>>31053818
Good comedy requires high intelligence and high intelligence has been linked to loneliness, detachment, and depression since before Jesus was born, dude.
>>
>>31053740
>>31053745
thanks, I work at a non-profit working with high school kids; a lot of them come in with the same M.O. and I have a lot of fun with those kids, who I now call friends. I went through my share of loneliness and depression too, so I understand how it can be difficult sometimes.

it'd be even easier with adults and 4channers, just as long as you don't bully my animu tastes too much.
>>
>>31053834
That guy wasn't even me, holy projection. Just remember you're talking about being molested in the same thread as people confessing to picking their noses.
>>
>>31053676
Take care of yourself, anon. You're a good person who has a good heart.
>>
>>31053697
>>31053776
Ah, there it is.
You do realize you're unfairly minimalizing someone elses issue and have no right to compare and contrast to it given that you have no idea how that one "small" problem can majorly affect some people? You're just as "entitled" sounding as they are, yeah your problems were horrid, but you're extremely jaded. If this is the worst that anon has experienced in life, then who are you to say that they should suck it up and stop being such a bitch and too off themselves? Stop pushing your own ideal on other people. It's a real fucking issue if you can't have sex, one of the key fucking things in life - and maybe YOU don't care about it because of that feminist bs. But it's an incredibly huge part of society and human continuation. There is a HUGE fucking problem with this kind of thing, and your self entitled aspie ass thinks that because you did x y or z thing that you can tell people that they're shit. Get fucked man, seriously. You're a horrible self-entitled, narrow-minded person who has instead of tried showing some sort understanding, has been nothing but a high opinionated self important cunt.

It's not THAT anons fault you have bigger issues, but you need to fucking quit minimizing other peoples problems because you had it bad. and their specific problem isn't a problem for you.
>>
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>>31053818
Comedy is related to happiness. However in my case I'm good at comedy because I 1. Just want people happy t be around me, which is related to my loneliness and pure NEED for acceptance, as well as what >>31053860
said.

Every comedy show I did went well but I still don't think highly of it because I hate myself.
>>
>>31053860
People have told me I shoild be a comedian but I'm awkward and inconsistent. I'm not depressed but life is pretty empty.
>>
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>>31051136
>pic related
>33
> lost my V card to my babysitter when I was 8
>>
>Marowak
>23
>I found out my girlfriend was cheating on me for 5 months on Christmas morning. Now we're never talking again probably because of the fallout when I called her out on her lies and bullshit.
Also my car died again.
And so did my cat.
>>
>>31053923
Your cat died again? Good thing they have nine lives.

Sorry anon
>>
>Favorite pokemon
Blaziken, because she was my first starter. Otherwise, maybe eevee for his cuteness, or squirtle for being a good bro in mystery dungeon red.
>Age
20
>Darkest secret
I don't really keep secrets, I just don't tell people things unless they ask. But if they ask, I tell the truth. Had a shit past and shit present, but that's not what is being asked for.
One of the highly illegal secrets mentioned multiple times in the thread is something I have too.
>>
>lopunny
i fantasize about fucking all my friends, male and female. i managed to fuck one of them this year(a male) and it was the only time ive ever had sex.
im shy and awkward in real life and once im actually in a real sexual situation all my freakiness withers away.

and im a furry. i feel like a lot of my friends would hate me if i was more obvious about it but they already probably suspect i am anyway.
>>
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>Pokemon
pic

>Age
18

>Darkest Secret
I never learned how to ride a bike when I was a kid because I got scared shitless when I saw the Grim Adventures of Billy and Mandy: Tricycle of Terror episode. It put the fear of possessed bikes in me and I still get a little bit uncomfortable whenever I see an unmanned bike.
>>
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>Darmanitan
>19
>I can't peel back my foreskin as it stretches over the tip of my penis only leaving a 5mm-ish hole for fluids to escape from. I'm too much of a pussy to mention it to my parents or even a doctor, but I really need to at some point. There's probably a lot of gunk accumulated under there
>>
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>>31051136
Pic related
18
I hate anime and begrudge its fanbase and frequently chastise my weeaboo friends that like anime, but I regularly masturbate to obscure doujinshi without shame
>>
>>31054034
forgot to include that im 19.
>>
>>31054040
you got phimosis dyde. its not uncommon and docs will be able to help
might take a circumcision though
just ask for help
>>
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>>31054038
I'm 24 and can't ride a bike or swim. Bike because my balance is poor, swimming because my body refuses to float.
>>
>>31053788
Right on. This will certainly help in the future.
Thank you very much, gracious anon.
>>
Don't know if I have a favourite pokemon. Alolan raichu is cute.

I'm 27

I'm schizoprenic (paranoid type, but IIRC they don't diagnose types anymore). Was medicated but I stopped taking them after my gf left me because I was 'too different' when I functioned like a proper adult. Still have a job tho, so I guess life isn't as bad as it feels.
>>
>>31054077
>EVEN THIS THING HAS A GF
>>
>>31054060
I feel you dude; didn't learn to do either until I was 19 because my ears were fucked. Honestly not that fun though, you're not missing much.
>>
>>31054058
thanks anon, i'll bring it up when i see the doctors in a few days (at least I'll try to)
>>
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I wonder how many fucked up people like y'all I pass by at the grocery store.

Like for some people you wouldn't know just looking at them.
>>
>>31051937
Bruh same
Just alternate so you don't lose attraction to a real vagina
somehow that works for me
>>
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>>31054077
>GF left you for being "too normal" when on medication
You probably dodged a bullet if she left you for that reason
>>
>>31053422
>pikachu
fucking disgusting
>>
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>>31051136
>All of them!
>27
>When I was 12 I had sex multiple times with my cousin that is two years older than me and her two friends. In short I had long hair as a kid. My cousins friends liked playing with it while we watched TV. Being 12 pretty much everything gives you an erection especially girls running their fingers through your hair and pushing up against you. One noticed the erection and started poking fun at me about it. After a while of awkward laughing the other asked to see it, which turned into a I'll show you mine if you show me yours, and stuff escalated from there that is probably not meant for blue boards.
>>
>All these cousinfuckers

Wish I had female relatives my age.
>>
>>31051136
>Slowking
>25
>My fetish is seeing women getting covered in brightly-coloured slime on TV shows
>>
>>31053703
It's nice.
Justice.
It was a bit of a silly reason, but it's a nice path.
>>
>>31054266
Usually it's either you end up like the one anon and have to cut ties with all of your family. Or my case where it went on for a few years and then there was the "awkward we need to stop phase and pretend that everything is normal".
>>
>>31054296
Better than no sexual experiences at all.
>>
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>>31054294
>>
>>31054294
Gee I wonder what TV show you watched as a kid
>>
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>>31054321
You could just have sex with people, or pay for it. Unless you get a slut on the first date you'll spend more money trying to get a normal girl than a hooker. Average cost of sex is however much you are going to pay on 2-4 dates, so hookers are usually cheaper.
>>
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>>31054322
>>31054344
I'm happy with myself
>>
>>31053276
>he astral projects
>in 2016
>>
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>>31054355
>he doesn't have mind powers
>>
>>31054344
>Implying I could convince a woman to go on a date with me

I'm a fat balding neckbeard who can't make eye contact with people or say more than hi to girls my age.
>>
>>31054344
>You could just have sex with people

Rape is hard to pull off
>>
>cubone
>21
i'm in an online ldr and ever since i started i feel horrible about myself i often fantasize to cutall ties and be alone again because i was happy being alone but i love him so much to do it
I'm scared he will cheat on me or if he just using me
>>
>>31054328
There's literally hundreds of TV shows with that sort of thing
>>
>>31054403
Lets fuck cheating is cool
54m india here
>>
Kommo-o
24
I often fantasize about if I was born a girl, and how my life would have been different, with the most common fantasy being about me marrying a childhood friend
>>
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>>31054362
So you know what you need to fix about yourself. Just shave your head and face, and work on losing some weight. Go out in public and dealing with people will become easier.

>>31054388
Well yeah with that attitude it will be.
>>
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>Bronzong
>24
I don't actually have any dark secrets and I'm always way too open about the nasty shit that I like.
>>
>>31054454
I can't imagine it becoming easier. My social skills have actually gotten worse since finishing school and starting to work in retail. All I can think to do is smile and agree with anything people say. Worthwhile replies don't come to mind until five minutes too late.
>>
>>31051136
Haunter
age:21
I sometimes go to the female sexy audio thread on /soc/ and request that girls get off because of me because I'll never be able to get a girl off any other way
>>
>>31054482
I thought the same at first, but I feel helping customers helps with that a bit
>>
>>31051449
You retard
>>
>>31053676
That hit me quite hard in the feels. There was a time my parents lied to the police because they wanted to put me in jail as a punishment, but the police out of ``mercy'' put me in a mental hospital instead for a week.
And then when child services were notified my parents beat me, they recommended family therapy. That's it. USA.
>>
>>31051649
Adam, when is your next video out?
>>
>>31054502
I was a cashier for over two years. Now I work in the grocery department but can't think of anything to say in the moment beyond "Hi / How are you". When a cistomer says anything to me all I can say is "Heh, yeah".
>>
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>Glaceon
>26
One time when I was pouring some cereal for my roommate, I overestimated the amount of milk there was in the gallon, so I had to mix skim and 2% milk together to fill up the bowl. He never found out
>>
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>>31054482
I hear ya, I still take xanax when I have to go out, and after I'm home it feels like I ran a damn marathon just from anxiety. Just take up some other stuff like helping with a charity or community thing. It gets you around people more, and gives you some more self worth to have the confidence to have conversations with people.
>>
Mudkip
21

I used to self harm as a teenager. We caught my dad having an affair at the same time I realized I wasn't straight. I stayed in denial of both things and the self harm became worse.

I still find myself wanting to do it sometimes, but my fiance would definitely notice if I did. My mom is fighting cancer for the second time in two years and I can't stand the thought of losing both my parents. Those self harm thoughts surface at times, but my fiance is always able to stop me.
>>
>>31051449
Everything is easy to kill when you hit it with a 4,000lb death machine.
>>
>>31054574
You monster
>>
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>>31054550
I've had the same issue when customer support deviates from the format of [greeting] [customer talks about thing they need] [ask for details or follow up], I was once told to tell some customers to finish up their purchases because the store was about to close early, but I just ended up babling incoherently instead of verbalizing what I had in my head at the time.
>>
>>31054574
you motherfucker
>>
>>31054577
I do stuff at the volunteer radio station. I'll have awkward exchanges with the other volunteers, but again it's always stilted and abrupt.
>>
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>Whimsicott
>23
>I blew a homeless guy in my neighborhood. I swallowed.
>>
>>31054644
Hot
>>
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>>31051136
>Eevee
>22
I have an unironically autistic obsession with the Eevee line, it's one of the main things that keeps me playing the games. I usually run an all-female nicknamed Eeveelution team that I regularly care for in amie/refresh and choose partially based on "personalities" derived from natures/characteristics (basically as long as they jive and aren't retarded/contradictory to each other, not proud of its power-tier). I also have an encrypted volume full of cute pictures and often fantasize about cuddling/sleeping with/playing with/caring for one IRL, I think they just feel like the perfect pet I've always wanted, with the ability to express themselves/communicate on a near-human level but with the unconditional love and friendship (and cuteness) of a regular pet. It really fills a void in my heart and appeals to my fear of deep trust/relationships with other people.

I don't /think/ I'm much of a furfag, I won't even save SFW crops, and I'm also usually the first to tell particularly obnoxious waifufags to kill themselves.
>>
>>31054454
>that pic
>tfw i was that first panel with my sister when I was that age
>tfw had to live at my grandma's house one year when I was 9 or 10 while mine had some renovations done
>tfw her stupid comments to our mom put a stop to innocent baths
>tfw we might have been comfortable enough with each other for the second panel even now
Like I'm all for stopping the banging of the relatives, guys, but some things really are innocent.
I miss it.
>>
>>31054976
>encrypted
for what purpose
>>
>>31055001
>implying they want someone to see their ludicrous obsession with eevee and draw the wrong conclusions
>>
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>wooper
>18

I have fantasies of wanting to be in a relationship with someone like cuddling and just good ol' fashion dating never anything sexual though. Like genuinely being in love with someone and vice versa but then I remember I have no self confidence and feel like I could never really hold up a relationship and I consistently doubt myself about everything I do. Not exactly a dark secret but just something that I felt like sharing
>>
>>31055037
Having a bunch of pictures of pokemon isn't really that weird.
>>
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>>31051136
pic related
22
i dont want to wake up
>>
>>31055001
It just feels overly autistic and kind of shameful, and I also keep it on a flash drive so the idea of one day losing it and having some complete stranger finding a folder full of 800 pictures of animated animals with no context while trying to find information to contact me with kind of triggers me.

Most of my Pokémon-playing bros and family know I'm an Eeveefag but probably not on that level, I felt cringy enough when one of them looked through my breedject boxes.
>>
Sceptile
24
When I was 13 I jerked off on the school bus. I was the last one to get off and I sat in the far back with nobody else near me.
>>
>>31055087
I remember way back some particularly autistic kid in my high school got caught masturbating to porn unironically in the middle of class with people sitting right next to him.

That doesn't even sound bad in comparison.
>>
Metagross
22
I've been attracted to kids since I was 16, and was on the brink of suicide for a long time because of it.
>>
>>31055050
literally me aside from the age >>31055061
>>
>>31053798
Same.
>>
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>>31051136
>Favorite Pokemon
Abra
>Age
20
>Darkest secret

I don't like my girlfriend that much, but it's nice getting laid 3-4 times a week.
>>
>>31055050
>cuddle the heck out of someone
>but not looking for sexual
>fantasize about it constantly
Are you me.
I've literally had a dream where I ripped a friend's clothes off and then everyone acted like nothing changed, myself included, then I felt terrible like I invaded her actual irl privacy for a week even though I knew it was just a dream and I didn't really have control.
I am very much for cuddle. But definitely not for sexual.
>>
>>31054038
I still don't know how to ride a bike and I'm 22, I took a spill while learning when I was about 6 and just never wanted to do it again, my parents just said fuck it and gave me a scooter and that was that.

It's not like I ever needed to, there weren't any kids out of walking range in my neighborhood as a kid really and by the time I needed to venture outside of that sphere on my own I had a car.
>>
>scizor

>20

I beat the shit out of some kid for looking at me once. He had to go to the hospital. Happened in middle school. I feel awful about it and I'm afraid I'll do something stupid like that again. I did that shit all the time when I was younger as well. I fucking hate myself for it, and I hope those kids are ok.
>>
>>31055697
You're gonna have a Friends episode one day with someone who cares about you a lot
>>
Alakazam
just turned 21
I was too lazy to breed a HP Fire MG Alakazam until Gen 7
Thread posts: 333
Thread images: 97


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