Why can't Pokemons be real?

Because I fuck your mom daily.

>>30692782
Because someone would light themselves on fire trying to fuck one.

>>30693323
>"In tonight's story, one middle-aged man burned himself to near death in his home after trying to sexually assault his Flareon."

File: 1481411605416.png (163KB, 500x500px) Image search: [Google]

163KB, 500x500px

>>30692782
Because life is unfair

A

FUCKING

LEAF

That glaceon is too fucking small.

File: image.jpg (212KB, 1125x1737px) Image search: [Google]

212KB, 1125x1737px

>>30693513
>>30693524
>>30693540
I would say something to defend my country but right now video games are 90 bucks each so...

>>30693603
Trust me dude the last gardian is a lesson in pain dont buy it

>>30693603
Post an example of a video game. if you want to make that point.
>>30693667
I really hate to derail but that game is just so bad, the entire core concept, from what I can tell, is handicapping the player's controls for the vast majority of the game so that the most basic of tasks become a long slog to complete. It seems to me like the devs say "Hey you, Pikachu!" and thought "Holy shit this is the best thing ever made ever. A game where you LITERALLY can't control it? WHY DID NO ONE THINK OF THIS BEFORE" and then became super disappointed when they found out that that was not a feature of the game, and decided to make their own game where that is the entire game, and sell it for $60 USD on a platform mostly owned by people who have no patience for that kind of thing

>>30692782
Because most of them have enough power to wipe us out.

>>30692782
because the ice dog would look like >>30693381 irl

pokemon VR when???

>tfw born in the worst planet, worst galaxy, worst universe and worst reality

File: cacturne.png (148KB, 500x636px) Image search: [Google]

148KB, 500x636px

Because it would be dangerous as fuck?
Like seriously, people get freaked out over a regular spider, imagine ones that were as big as dogs and could shoot lightning? Or wild animals that could hypnotize you, alter the weather on a whim, or eat whole mountains?

>>30692782
bioethics

on the other hand, chinks dont give a shit, so we might see real pokeymangs in a hundred years and lots of monstergirls by then

>>30693798
Tumblr has some original settings.
And there's also FATAL, if you excuse the crossboarding. IF you don't know what FATAL is, it's an enjoyable RPG that's fun for the whole family and has its own original setting. Note: Poster takes no liability should anyone be actually stupid enough to even attempt to play fatal, much less with children

>>30693353
>>30693323
if you build up consent, that wont happen.

my horses would have otherwise broken my legs by now

File: 1481063646385.gif (399KB, 870x690px) Image search: [Google]

399KB, 870x690px

>>30692782
Because when it comes down to it, science doesn't work that way. Could we invent genetically modified creatures that look like Pokemon? Absolutely, might even be possible within the next couple decades. Can we give them the ridiculous magic-tier super powers that allow them to control time, space, and the elements? Hell fucking no. We can't even figure out how to do that shit ourselves without expending stupid amounts of energy, and even if we did why would we put that shit in a bunch of semi-sapient animals? It's like you want to die just because some dude thought fucking his Pokemon against it's will was a great idea and now it thinks all humans are evil and wants to KILL THEM WITH IT'S ABILITY TO FREEZE ANYTHING SOLID IN SECONDS.

tl;dr Pokemon only work in the Pokemon world because they play by different rules than we do

government would either keep them secret from us or they'd take them away or they'd be legal and illegal in certain states, countries and areas and such etc

>>30692782
>drinking alcohol
Spotted the edgy underaged trying to look cool

30693983
spotted the extremely bad bait
doesnt deserve a (you)

>>30692782
Because they would slap our shit silly and shove it back in our asses with their powers.