ITT: /vp/ writes a letter to Lillie abroad

Fuckface

>>30538288
UGLY SLUT

I hope

you die

niggerdick

I really like

(You)

I sold your pokedoll

And then

to

Anyways, here's Wonderwall

Your bed

HE

fucked it

with a

zimmy zim zam wazzle

I hope you

The other day i

sucked 13 cocks

And i thought of yours.

get in the bag

And

>>30538466
Toady is gonna be the day

pew

IT'S

I traded nebby on GTS for a Quick Ball Abra.

I released the Abra after.

Nebby is not good at sex tbqh

The abra had inner focus, it was worth it.

I then decided to devote my life to catching abra's with quick balls, then trading them to the world while pretending I am Japanese.

haha benis :-D

If you see a quick ball abra. Know it is me, I plan to over-saturate the market and then suddenly cut them off to make money off of my abra business.

>>30538288
Dear Lillie,

I never got the chance to tell you, but I've liked you ever since we met and I can't stand being without you. I'm going to follow you to Kanto to make sure you're doing alright, maybe we can have some more adventures together too! See you soon!

Love, Hau

That was a letter hau sent, he never reached kanto due to a plane crash. The funeral was yesterday.

>>30538888
I hope you checked that get lillie.

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>>30538288
Dear Lillie,
Remember that your virginity is mine

Love, [Spoiler]mallow[/spoiler]
>an image is attached to the letter
>

>>30538888
holy fr*Ck this thread is weird

>>30538765
>>30538832
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAh

That's exactly what Hau sounded like during the plane crash.

File: 1453846317897.png (374KB, 640x360px) Image search: [Google]

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>>30538888
Quads of power
RIP Hau

Yes, I was there. Luckily the Abras teleported me to safety.

I've always wondered what your cooter smells like
Probably deep fried salted fish
circle Y or N to confirm or deconfirmed my suspicion

>>30538888
RIP Hau

>>30539119
kek

Hau came back as a zombie, but gladion freaked the fuck out and killed him again...some bullshit that it reminded him of a dying type:null he found and it activated his psd or some dumb shit like that i don't care
i miss hau do you miss hau?

>>30538288
>>30538444
>>30538466
>>30538555
>>30538888
Hau are these dubs?

I lied, I don't miss hau. I take solace in the fact that his raichu is at the bottom of the sea now.

being dead sucks

Undead Hau was also mad you didn't come to his funeral.

We gave him masaladas to quell his anger.

After the Hau fiasco i decided to resume my business, half of all pokemon in Alola are now Quickball Abra's. I released a ton and now it's an invasive species. Also since i kinda stole the guardians of the islands long story short all the guardians are now abra.

I'll be home for Christmas

Chicken a shit

I'll even bring you a quick ball Abra fresh from my quick ball Abra farm™.

I wanted to meet you again, but at the same time, I have things to take care of as the champion of Alola. So then I thought; why not bring the entire Alola with me?

since about a half of all the islands is abra's now and I own all of them We can teleport Alola to wherever we please.

release your new pokemon

File: 1480876054533.png (116KB, 738x768px) Image search: [Google]

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There's someone else now. I'm sorry. Maybe you shouldn't have left.

You may have noticed strange markings at the end of this letter. It is a tracking sigil to notify you location.

It would be a good idea for you to place this letter somewhere close enough to walk to you but far enough so that the islands of Alola won't crush you when we teleport to it.

>>30538288
Dear Fuckface Ugly Slut,

I hope you die niggerdick, I really like (you) I sold your poke doll and then anyways, here's wonder wall. Your bed HE fucked it with a zimmy zim cam dazzle, I hope you the other day I sucked 13 cocks and I thought of yours. Get in the bag and toady is gonna be the day.

pew ITS I traded nubby on GTS for a Quick Ball Abra, I released the Abra after. Nebby is not good at sex tbqh (The abra had inner focus, it was worth it).

I then decided to devote my life to catching abra's with quick balls, then trading them to the world while pretending I am Japanese (haha benis), If you see a quick ball abra. Know it is me, I plan to over-saturate the market and then suddenly cut them off to make money off of my abra business.

There's someone else now. I'm sorry. Maybe you shouldn't have left.

We did a trial run when we tried to teleport to Unova. It did not go as planned, Unova is now known as lower Alola.

>>30539735
Don't you dare forget the rest of the abra fiasco.

The good news is that Alola now has a subway system.

Also i found a rock that can talk that isn't secretly a muslim
He says his name is hilbert and to help him but he's a fucking rock what am i to do?

The bad news is that the subway is filled with corpses.

Your mother didn't approve of the direction Alola was going, so she tried to rebel against one of the abra guardians, the other abra's didn't take too kindly to that. She has been teleported somewhere unknown, if you see her in your travel's do not be shocked.

Oh and after gladion killed hau, he also got send somewhere else i don't know where
The abras must really like hau for some reason i don't get it
By the way how does one breed a Silvally? or if possible, add reproducing capabilities to it? just asking for a friend who got one of the type:nulls gladion rescued and wants to give everyone onne too nothing suspicious here hehe...

As i was writing this letter i recieved a notification from one of our new Postal Abra's that we found your mother. She was teleported to Lower Alola. She miraculously survived and vowed to obey the new abra overlords.

Don't come back.

because we don't know how to teleport back to Alola's original location, there will be nothing there.

>>30538288
>Dear Lillie,
>*picture of Olivia getting creampied*
>We'd like you to be the godmother.
>With love, Anon

I have been writing this letter across a couple of days and much has happened since then. We found the corpse of Hau, the abra's made what appears to be a church in lower alola. They appear to believe that Hau was the son of god come down to guide them to the afterlife, However before Hau could achieve this task the Judas known as Gladion killed him.

The Grimsby guy seems to still be angry at me for destroying half of Unova. Not like I did it on purpose, mind you.

Dear bitch,
literally fuck off.
you keep holding me back and i'm glad you're gone.
go die in a fire.

regards,
anon

Listen, Lillie. This is Eric. I've been anxiously awaiting your return for 27 days now. I had to pay $11 for one hour of internet access to post this, but I hope you'll receive my message.

Lillie, you're all that's on my mind. Ever since I saw you on that bridge, after I sent you my embarrassing private message, I've dreamt of nothing but that luscious smile of yours. I've had many a few romantic encounters since this day, but none of them were as scandalous as you, my love.

The past month of waiting for your return have been rough. People have begged me to give up all hope, that since you haven't contacted me since the 10th of November, you're not coming back.

But alas, my love, I would never listen to them, as they sit upon thrones of lies and slander! All they set out to do is break my heart, and I can entrust you with it, knowing that you will never turn your back on me like they all believe you will!

I lived underground, in a cellar, for about 3 weeks in waiting for your response. It was then that I realized no one can replace you, and you the object of my affection, for now and forever, my pony-tailed Goddess.

Even though I've been beaten, ridiculed against, and altogether insulted by those who have no faith in my passionate heart, I still shall await your final projection, my love! May your Poké Doll forever stay colorful, and may you put your heart into this, so that we can become one, Lillie!

My heart, my body and my soul are all yours, from now until the end of time. I will never give up my faith in you, as I know that you never shall in me. I know that you are hard at work and will complete this in a timely manner like you always do.

Til that day, my love, I bid you adieu. But this is not a permanent goodbye, no no! As you can see, my faith shall not waiver! Lillie, I await your return to Alola, in addition to your facetious return of my love, darling!

Yours forever,

Eric Woods

Anyways I should wrap this up, Remember to place the sigil far from you so that we don't have a lower lower Alola. We will teleport to you on December 5th at 6:45 Unovan Standard Time.

With warm regards,
Your Favorite Trainer.

Dear Lillie

WAKE UP
GRAB A BRUSH AND PUT A LITTLE MAKEUP

>>30540591
HIDE THE SCARS TO FADE AWAY THE SHAKEUP

Dear Fuckface UGLY SLUT,

I hope you die niggerdick cuck I really like (You), I sold your pokedoll And then to Anyways, here's Wonderwall.

Your bed HE fucked it with a zimmy zim zam wazzle. The other day i sucked 13 cocks and i thought of yours.

Get in the bag and today is gonna be the day (pew) I traded Nebby on GTS for a quick ball Abra, i released the Abra after. Nebby was not good at sex tbqh (The abra had inner focus, it was worth it.)

I then decided to devote my life to catching abra's with quick balls, then trading them to the world while pretending I am Japanese (haha benis :-D.) If you see a quick ball abra. Know it is me, I plan to over-saturate the market and then suddenly cut them off to make money off of my abra business.

"Dear Lillie,

I never got the chance to tell you, but I've liked you ever since we met and I can't stand being without you. I'm going to follow you to Kanto to make sure you're doing alright, maybe we can have some more adventures together too! See you soon!

Love, Hau"

That was a letter hau sent, he never reached kanto due to a plane crash. The funeral was yesterday, (I hope you checked that get Lillie.)

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAh. That's exactly what Hau sounded like during the plane crash. Yes, I was there. Luckily the Abras teleported me to safety.

I've always wondered what your cooter smells like
Probably deep fried salted fish
circle Y or N to confirm or deconfirmed my suspicion

Y N

Hau came back as a zombie, but gladion freaked the fuck out and killed him again...some bullshit that it reminded him of a dying type:null he found and it activated his psd or some dumb shit like that i don't care
i miss hau do you miss hau?
I lied, I don't miss hau. I take solace in the fact that his raichu is at the bottom of the sea now (being dead sucks.)

Undead Hau was also mad you didn't come to his funeral. We gave him masaladas to quell his anger.

Pt 1/??

>>30540974
(Pt 2/??)

After the Hau fiasco i decided to resume my business, half of all pokemon in Alola are now Quickball Abra's. I released a ton and now it's an invasive species. Also since i kinda stole the guardians of the islands long story short all the guardians are now abra. I'll be home for Christmas (Chicken a shit.) I'll even bring you a quick ball Abra fresh from my quick ball Abra farm™.

I wanted to meet you again, but at the same time, I have things to take care of as the champion of Alola. So then I thought; why not bring the entire Alola with me? Since about a half of all the islands is abra's now and I own all of them We can teleport Alola to wherever we please.

Release your new pokemon. There's someone else now. I'm sorry. Maybe you shouldn't have left.

You may have noticed strange markings at the end of this letter. It is a tracking sigil to notify you location. It would be a good idea for you to place this letter somewhere close enough to walk to you but far enough so that the islands of Alola won't crush you when we teleport to it. We did a trial run when we tried to teleport to Unova. It did not go as planned, Unova is now known as lower Alola. The good news is that Alola now has a subway system. The bad news is that the subway is filled with corpses.

Also i found a rock that can talk that isn't secretly a muslim
He says his name is hilbert and to help him but he's a fucking rock what am i to do?

Your mother didn't approve of the direction Alola was going, so she tried to rebel against one of the abra guardians, the other abra's didn't take too kindly to that. She has been teleported somewhere unknown, if you see her in your travel's do not be shocked.

(Pt 2/???)

>>30541143
Pt 3/???

Oh and after gladion killed hau, he also got send somewhere else i don't know where
The abras must really like hau for some reason i don't get it
By the way how does one breed a Silvally? or if possible, add reproducing capabilities to it? just asking for a friend who got one of the type:nulls gladion rescued and wants to give everyone onne too nothing suspicious here hehe...

As i was writing this letter i recieved a notification from one of our new Postal Abra's that we found your mother. She was teleported to Lower Alola. She miraculously survived and vowed to obey the new abra overlords.

Don't come back, because we don't know how to teleport back to Alola's original location, there will be nothing there.

I have been writing this letter across a couple of days and much has happened since then. We found the corpse of Hau, the abra's made what appears to be a church in lower alola. They appear to believe that Hau was the son of god come down to guide them to the afterlife, However before Hau could achieve this task the Judas known as Gladion killed him.

The Grimsby guy seems to still be angry at me for destroying half of Unova. Not like I did it on purpose, mind you.

Anyways I should wrap this up, Remember to place the sigil far from you so that we don't have a lower lower Alola. We will teleport to you on December 5th at 6:45 Unovan Standard Time.

With warm regards,
Your Favorite Trainer.

◙►↕◙

Well, that went off the rails.

Rip Unova, it was nice knowing ye

>>30541317
c:

Now if you'll excuse me I'm gonna recreate the Abra Empire.

>>30541369
Alas i knew her well.

>>30541249
You even added the sigils at the end, thats pretty neat.

>>30541450
Thanks, this piece of art had to be accurate.

>>30541249
10/10

https://www.mediafire.com/?4cs82n3b9033x48

Free Digital copy.

>>30540974
>>30541143
>>30541249
Thank you for this anon
10/10

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591KB, 1000x640px

>>30538888

>>30541789
KEK

I'm considering doing a reading of this and putting it on vocaroo.

>>30541839
if you have a good voice

do it

>>30540467
lol someone went fucking tryhard.

>>30541887
His shitty love letter didn't make my final cut for obvious reasons.

Saved.

>>30541887
>>30541950
How hilarious would it be if his actual name is Eric Woods and he wrote this from his mothers basement.

>>30538888
Hau BTFO

>>30538288
AND FUCKING GODDAMMIT NEBBY, GET IN THE FUGGED BAG NOW AND NEVER OUT

*pew*