>This is a cake How would you make her happy /vp/?

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By adding some frosting obviously.

>>30193433
da g shpot

>>30193433
Get some icing on that cake, anon.

by ending her life

Olivia is next level I can't even

>>30193521
Murder attempts usually traumatize people, anon. That won't make her happy.

>tfw no /ss/ bait
this game is a failure on all levels

A nice hug should do the trick.

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>>30193587
How do you think she'd feel if Sun promised to come for her when he grew up?

>>30193997
I think she wouldn't want to want. and she already sees a fine young man in front of her.

>>30193997
Sad. She's waited about half her life for a dude, why wait half of someone else's?

>>30195889
It's not about how long you wait, it's about ending up with someone who cares about you

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>>30193433
I'll battler her vagina and land as many very effektive hits with my dick as possible.
If you know what I'm implying.

>>30193433
Pee in her butt.

>>30193433
I want to eat this cake's asshole

>>30193433
Lick between her toes.

>>30196184
I don't understand. Please be a little clearer.

>>30193433
Hook her up with this dude i know on poke pelago

Mating Press until she has 5 kids.

>>30196377
Correct answer

>>30196377
Fuck is mating press?

>>30193433
by marrying her and making love to her in the missionary position for the sole purpose of having children

>>30193433
Murder her.

>>30196443
The best

>>30196443
Pretty much balls deep.

>>30196443
It's the position where you go balls deep while doing a fully body press onto them in the missionary position

>>30195889
She'd only have to wait 5-6 years of grooming them into her ideal man

>>30196554
that sounds hot.

>>30193433
by catching tapu lele, thus removing the spell that was casted on her, allowing her to be with the Masked Royal

>>30193433
Buy her a Bewear dildo

>>30196464
REPORTED

>>30196443
Something only girls can do

>>30196668
The Masked Royal is married anon to the mask ;_;7

>>30196308
My Onix would use Liquidation on her Soaked Cloyster.

>>30193540
I've personally been haunted by mine for about 4 years now

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>>30196464
>sole purpose of having children
I guess you'd have to. By the time you get hitched she'd almost be in the too dangerous to have kids age range

>>30197632
She's 25 at the most anon

>>30197676
you're not a cake until you're 26

>>30196668
Is this a meme or did that actually happen? If so that's fucked up

>>30193433
Mallow already does.

>>30197710
she also isn't literally a christmas cake

>>30197710
No, 25 is the actual cake age. When you are born you aren't 1 year old.

>>30197824
Can confirm, am a Jap, even if she's 30, my thirst will be quenched when I have her.

>>30197710
They never actually state her age, so she's technically not cake yet.

>>30197854
this desu. 30 isn't even a bad age. 35 is the last truly "good" year before things start to decline.

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>>30193433
Get her a chiropractor, she's got some serious posture problems.

>>30197891
calm yourself, anon. She's only presenting!

>>30197871
She may not actually be a cake so much as she's close to being one. I do think it was mentioned that she was pretty young when she became Kahana or something to that effect. If she were already a cake then no one would even make mention of her being single.

>>30197844
You don't want a Christmas cake AFTER Christmas. It's 26, anon.

>>30198230
In terms of years, AFTER christmas is after their 25th birthday in this case.

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>>30193433
Have Mallow cook for her.

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Olivia just hasn't found the right woman yet.

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>Olivia loses a battle to a male trainer
>she gives him Rockium Z and passport stamp but he says he wants more
>he crouches down, pulls down her shorts, and begins eating her out before she can react
>he continues and eventually bends her over
>"I've got a Rockium Z to give you too"
>all she can do is moan as he begins fucking her
>they wind up missionary, her legs flailing around in the air around him as he pounds her
>he slows down, leans in close to her, and whispers in her ear that she's now his and that he's going to impregnate her
>as she feels his cock about to explode inside her, she feels her own orgasm about to hit
>before she can have the most intense orgasm of her life, she snaps back to reality
>the trainer is already gone and she realizes she has once again lost herself in her daydream fantasy
>she returns alone, as usual, to her empty home with only her Pokemon and Stufful to keep her company
>she masturbates before falling asleep, wondering if she'll ever be able to find a man to love her

Olivia makes me rock hard

>>30198377
Sauce pls.

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How the fuck is she still single? She must have some weird disorder or something, right?

>>30193433
eat her?

>>30198538
Tapu Lele doesn't want anyone getting close to her.

>>30198538
Tapu lele is the biggest cunt in alola even fini can't compare.

>>30198538
Tapu Lele is taking her frustrations out on Olivia

>>30198583
>>30198630
Someone explain this

>>30198668
Scales, son

>>30198668
Pretty sure its implied that tapu lele's scales have some mix effect on people. Some good and some bad which makes people think lele is the one responsible since Olivia is the one that's closes to it.

>>30198668
Lele wants that ass all to herself.

>>30198477
It went from hot to kind of sad in an instant.

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>>30198477
I need not these feels

>>30198827
Selfish cunt, can't she learn to share?

>>30198864
The tapus are a fickle race.

>>30198864
The Tapus are all cunts. The only reason they're worshiped is because everyone is afraid they'll go full reeeeeeee if they don't/

>>30199145
Koko is a bros if I remember correctly.
But I just got to the third island so.

>>30199145
>an eleven year old autist was able to subdue all four of them for fun
Are the Alolans the most collectively pussy ass motherfuckers in the Pokemon world?

>>30198864
Tapus are assholes. Koko only cares about fighting and if you can't fight he doesn't care about you. Lele is sadistic for no reason other than boredom and curiosity. Bulu is lazy and easily offended. Fini is a cunt that makes the sea foggy as fuck to kill sailors for shits and giggles.

They can't keep getting away with it.

>>30199197
koko is only somewhat nice to the protag. Kukui himself said Koko is "a bit of a fickle one"

>>30199197
>It confuses its enemies by flying too quickly for the eye to follow. It has a hair-trigger temper but forgets what made it angry an instant later.

Anger issues and dementia

>This guardian deity of Akala is guilelessly cruel. The fragrant aroma of flowers is the source of its energy.

Giant cunt

>The guardian deity of Ula’ula is a lazy Pokémon. It commands plants to immobilize its foes and then deals them a savage blow with its horns.

Lazy piece of shit. It also destroys a fucking town.

>The dense fog it creates brings the downfall and destruction of its confused enemies. Ocean currents are the source of its energy.

Fucking kills people.

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You know, I never thought that this would be our Pokecake.

What other Pokegirls do you think have lonely love lives? I'd bet Glacia

>>30199197
Spoiler but he only saves you and Nebby so he can fight Nebby at full strength later and only gave you a Z Ring for that purpose. he literally only gives a shit about fighting and if he didn't think Nebby had potential he'd have literally just let you both drown.

>>30199206
Yes. The native evil team is a fucking joke while the real, foreign evil team gets shit done and is an actual threat. The first champion in the entire region has been living there for all of like 3 days.

>>30199206
That eleven year old autist had a legendary to help them.

>>30199342
Lorelei

And now you know why the emissaries of sun and moon are better gods than the Tapus

>>30199342
Drasna

>>30199354
Sounds like Goku

>>30199342
Claire is on her way to being one. If she doesn't mellow out she's going to be a spinster.

>>30199546
Basically, except an asshole.

Is Olivia a virgin?

All this tapu lore...also wtf I hate the tapu now.

>>30199650
yes

>>30199633
>implying Goku isn't an asshole

>>30199650
Yes. She overcompensates by dressing like a whore.

>>30199501
Nah, she seems way too friendly. She probably has a sweetheart working a desk job somewhere in the league and they snuggle up each night.

>>30199591
Definitely. She's very difficult.

>>30199407
She barks at people, so I think it'd be difficult to get along

>>30193433
Make many caramel babies with Olivia!

>>30193582
She likes /ss/ though. Go eat in the restaurant with the Alola Special. She likes "boys with your appetite."

>>30199342
Sabrina

girl was working in 3rd rate Pokefilms

>>30199736
>Drasna
>too friendly
Exactly. Too friendly and considering the dragon's she raises are probably picky as hell, lead to the notion that she wouldn't put some lover above her dragons. If they aren't good enough to win her dragons approval they aren't enough for her.

>>30198827
>lele x olivia yuri never ever
why live?

>>30199891
so what you're saying is that she lost her virginity to a Noivern?

>>30199840
In Alola, everyone is a qt. quantity quality yadayada.

>>30199840
She doesn't want casual sex, she wants a qt3.14 bf. But she's embarrassed by the fact that she's that old and has never had sex so she dresses like a sex machine to fool everyone despite the fact that everyone knows.

>>30199894
just wait.

>>30199929
I bet Lele heals her hymen every time she tries to cheat with a dildo and fool people.

>>30199891
She's obviously married to a cynical copper.

>>30199912
Mysteriously lost it, is what I'm saying.

>>30199994
Nanu stop daydreaming and get back to handing out heart scales.

>>30198230
"...by the Japanese tradition that says a woman unmarried after age 25 is like a Christmas cake on Dec. 26 — stale"
No

>>30199975
WHY DOES IT KEEP GROWING BACK?!


LELE YOU CUNT WHY DID I EVEN TAKE THIS JOB

>>30198230
Also any day after your 25th birthday is over 25, cousin.

>>30200043
Not the reference I was making but that works too I guess

>>30200075
>Implying she "took" the "job"

>>30200110
Looker's married to his job

>>30200140
He's not cynical either.

>>30193582
>shotafags once again inserting themselves into everything
Kys

>>30200043
Nanu is clearly married to his loyal stray garfiefs. Maybe forcefully married to bulu as well.

>>30196791
nice blog attention whore

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>>30200115
Oh she took the job alright.

>>30200293
Quit posting Lele.
Fini's better.

>>30200208
I can't help it when I play a game full of attractive women where you play as a shota anon

I'm not even an /ss/fag

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I declare this gen the Generation of Waifus

>>30199332
>Lazy piece of shit. It also destroys a fucking town.
No, it destroyed a shopping mall built on sacred ground. Bulu was completely in the right there.

>>30200629
>Literally two good girls
>One of them is married to the professor
>The other got knocked up by a fatass amnesiac

>>30200674
>lusamine
>good

>>30199705
He's slightly less of an asshole.

>>30200499
This desu pokemon is an /ss/ goldmine, i say this as an /ss/fag

>>30200637
Tapu Village also got rekd by Bulu

>>30200674
Olivia > Lusamine > Burnet desu fampie

>>30200745
Olivia > Burnet >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> Lusamine tbqh

>>30200745
>>30200629
>Generation of waifus
>3 good girls

>>30200075
Oliva will kill lele one day and take its place has the new island god.

>>30200745
>>30200781
Yea Lusamine is bottom tier after you see what she's really like.

>generation of waifus
As someone who hasn't started yet are any of the characters even reccuring/around to fight/talk in post game?

Cast of unique females seems pretty small

>>30200789
Plumeria would be up there over Burnet probably, but that hair. How does it even work? Granted you could say the same for Burnet and Lusamine.

That Olivia has one of the most normal looking hairstyles is a big point in her favor. And then there's Anabel who became a total qt.

>>30200858
Going based purely on looks anon.

>>30199633
So Vegeta then.

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>>30200897

>>30201105
>Pubic tattoo

LITERALLY my fetish.

>>30200858
Lusamine went to the top for me after all was said and done.

>>30201115
Sorry anon but it's not a tattoo, it's like body paint or something. She doesn't have it in the post game.

>>30201115
Doesn't she get it removed though? Might be fake

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>>30200383
no

>>30201115

>Pubic

I think you mean Womb anon.

>>30200637
That shopping mall is also where pearl harbor is

>>30201249
I'd lick it off her

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>>30201115
>>30201406
Whatever it is, it's goddamn hot. I wish there were more artist that did it.

>>30201570
>slight amount of pubic hair
UUuuuuuunf. I love it.

>>30201570
Plum is cute

>>30201570
Imagine how it would look if her belly was swollen with child.

>>30193433

Guys, what the fuck is a cake?

Just an older woman?

>>30202784
A woman 25 or older. They're unwanted, no longer good, like Christmas cake after the 25th of December.

>>30202784
Woman over 25 years old.

>>30202824
>>30202825

Shit, I'd eat this cake wtf

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>>30202784
No, this is a cake. How have you never heard of it before?

>>30202623

>Pregnant Plumeria

Oh god yes please.

>>30202784
It's an old Japanese cultural thing where after 25 years of age a girl isn't seen as desirable

in popular media they're usually depicted as sort've loony and desperate to get a man

>>30202784
It's kind of like a Japanese "spinster" or "always a bridesmaid never a bride."

The expression is actually a bit outdated in modern Japan, but it comes from a custom of giving cakes on Christmas. No one wants a cake after the 25th!

>>30203077
>No one wants a cake after the 25th!

>not liking cake all year round
Once again, Japs prove to have the shittiest taste imaginable

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>>30203269
Ayyy give em a break. They may be crazy for not liking older ladies, but the archetype they've created is hot!

>>30198377
I NEED IT

>>30203296
>D1, D3, G6, H1
ok, I'll let this one slide

D3, god damn!

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>>30200800
This is you right now. Go back to sweeping the ruins servant.

>>30203539
>D3, god damn
I know that feel anon. Gonna watch the hell out of that show soon. She's dominant in it

Is it me, or is Olivia hotter in the game than she is in most of the fan art? Them swinging hips turn me to jelly.

>>30203780
I dunno, the game's chibi-but-not-quite-chibi models are throwing me off. I wish they had proper art like the Gen 6 games.

>>30203027
>Japanese
It's from China bro it is written 剩女(sheng nv) which means leftover women. In an agricultural society like China you want more kids to help you farm so you need to get started earlier.

>>30197891
someone post the gif

>>30204650
?

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>>30204650

>>30204684
anon delivers

>>30198477
>>"I've got a Rockium Z to give you too"

Look, you can actually pinpoint the moment the story went to trash

>>30205073
If you remove that line it's pretty ok

>>30205073
I mean, it's that the point? She's getting desperate and cheesy.

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>>30202845

REEEEEEEEEEEE

>>30205073
But that's the best part; it INTENTIONALLY sounds so much like bad fanfiction because it's a lewd fantasy from a sex-starved fox of a lady.

But hey, maybe I'm reading into this too hard, like public education conditioned me to.

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>>30205690

>>30205696
>fox
Anon please. She's a puma well on the way to being a cougar.

>>30205779
doesn't being a cougar require having kids

>>30205853
No you're thinking of milf, in it's more literal definition. Cougar's older woman going after young people(men)

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>>30205690

>>30205779
game freak should've thrown in some /ss/ bait

>>30205954
Only if you end your life

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>>30202623
FUCK. OFF. She probably has the sexiest stomach and tightest abs of any Pokegirl ever and you faggot degenerates want to ruin it with fucking pregnancy. You guys are fucking worse then THICC cucks, I swear.

>>30205971
Why are you so angry?

>>30206049
>one post about pregnancy
>degenerate
Goodness so many buzzwords. I can't wait for new release season to die.

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>>30206075
>"Hey guys I'm not new, really. I spotted the newfag bros! Haha! G-get off our board Nor-Mee! A-amirite? ;)"

Come down lad, there's no one to impress here faggot. Nothing worse than ORAS Redditers trying to act like oldfags

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>>30206049
>tfw art of her fucking gigantic and expanded with fat