ITT we pretend that Gen I Pokemon were just released today

/vp/ should've not existed then

>>27480909
I picked the fire lizard because his cool
But i'm stuck on the first gym, it's impossible to beat him.

Should I just pick the turtle?

>>27481004
No man, my uncle works for Nintendo and he told he to pick the plant one cuz it beats the first two gyms.

>>27481004
I caught this little purple fucker nidoland or something and he learns double kick and it beats the first gym easy

>>27481959
Monkey is better, I killed all of spiky hair mans pokemon in maximum two hits, but for some reason I guess he's not strong against those starfish

>>27480909
>Pick Charmander
>Get to Pewter City and fight Brock
>Charmander can't do shit to his Pokemon
Literally Impossible

>>27481959
>>27481004
What a loser, you're obviously supposed to catch the monkey that shows uo next to the second town

>>27481959
Thanks man, but I don't want to grind up to Level 43 just to learn Double Kick.

>>27482030
>>27482065
I picked Blue, you faggot. I can't get Monkey dude.

HO
LY

SHIT

Guys I was fighting my catipillar and it got to level and it turned int a DIFFERENT POKEMON

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wtf is this thing even supposed to be? overdesigned as fuck

>>27481959
Dude you can get him to his final form at lv 16, this thing's fucking broken. I'm legit playing Blue right now.

Guys...Guys...GUYS!!! I fucking caught a pidgey and it evolved into a bigger pidgey. What the fuck kind of shit is this?

>>27482181
>>27482134
>>27482030
>dial it back anons, too much

>>27482112
HAHA Picking blue when RED is obviously the correct choice.

What don't your parents love you anon?

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It's just a pokeball. Fucking why, Gamefreak?

>almost end of the forest
>a cute mause apeared
>try the first gym to see how good electric mause is
>no damage at all
i guess nobody will ever use this thing, why botter when the other mause hace cool moves like tackle and quick attack

>>27482390
haha idiot

electric doesn't affect the rock-type. it's super effective against water, flying and ground, though

My brother told me you can surf through the walls in Mt Moon near the back, and there's anyway up to the top where another fossil Pokemon is--has anyone gotten that far yet?

>>27482498
Wow what a fucking nerd

you dumb fuck niggers ember absolutely destroys geodude an Onix because they have no special, resistance be damned

ain't no way to make brock hard in r/b

Vaporeon is total furbait, it looks too feminine, I'm gonna have my Eevee be a Jolteon just to kick its ass. I bet there's already tons of porn of her.

look at these kids playing pokeman what are you 4 haha nerds

>>27482666
>Those trips
Nice try satan! Vap-nation all the way!!

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>>27480909
What's up with that fucking truck in the harbor?

>>27480909
What is this shit?
Is this baby's first Megami Tensei?

Guys I picked the green plant fuck what is it the shit the monkey boy thing poops also when i did and then i went to purple town and the music was simple as fuck and ii found a red ferret or dog i gave it some smoked stone and now it is bigger wtf is this thing and what is that yellow thing that has some cheeks on it looks like a neopet

>>27482065
The monkey doesn't show up until after the fourth town anon. And only in Red. Maybe in your newfangled Japan only 'Pikachu edition'.

Guys my older cousin told me he evolved his Nidoran into a nidogod and it kills everything with an attack called vaporizer. Also, I'm listening to smash mouth and watching rocket power

This game is retarded, these little demon things evolve? Evolution is bullshit, the earth is 4000 years old and these damn japs are trying to poison our youth and turn them from the good lord jesus christ trump2016

>>27482839
What the fuck is a pickachu? Is that one of the legendaries or whatever?

oh and some kid at lunch told me that you could find mew under the truck i think they were serious AND when i was finding a pig monkey i thought the building had them all but i needed six badges like why do i need a badge for a monkey. my mom was reading a magazener when i saw a thing called mew i want my chilli lizard to beat that thing but i ant find it under the truck wtf also when i beat the elite 4 after 12 restarts i went to this cave called croolan CAVE and i found some thing called mewtwo wtf why did mew grow larger orr evolve as the game paper say before i caught it this is as broken as that bug thing that is ugly

>>27482988
Watch the cartoon of pokemon
It's okay, but it follows the games, kinda

Also that misty is kinda hot

>>27480909
>Glued together magnets and nails
>A fucking thumb
>Copypaste them in paint and now they are evolutions
What the fuck gamefreak?

so i trade my useless avra for something called sr.mimo and holy shit, he can rape the whole game, i just beat koga and seems like only mind mons can resist a hit from sr.mimo

you guys are idiots, you're pretending that Gen 1 was released today, and posting as if you're 2nd graders playing their very first Pokemon game.

>>27482148
>>27482290
>>27482666
>>27482734
>>27483078
these guys have the right idea.

>>27483031
the cartoon? what?

>>27483023
>my chili lizard

2much

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its just a birb

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>>27483123
I strongly second this

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2edgy4me

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>>27480909
AHAHAHHA GUYS LOOK AT THIS HILARIOUS NEW EXEGGUTOR FORM HOLY SHIT

once somebody gave me a chef psychic fuck face for my stupid rok and his stupid rock transformed into a dinosauer and his chef psychic is now have no star omg speaking of that somebody has this weird bird thing and my bird wont evolve to it can my chili lizard help with this or no and what channel is the channel on?

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Where can I catch a Charmander? I started off with Squirtle.

>>27481959
get a caterpie, when it evolves into butterfree it kills everything. Poison and confusion, mang.

>>27483325
it got rid of the dragon typing and got fucking psychic?? why the fuck does being fat all of a sudden mean its psychic?

>>27480909
This Venusaur thing is fucking garbage, why couldn't it be more like Meganium?

I think some of the evolutions they gave the baby Pokemon from last gen are a hit or miss.

Pichu's is alright thanks to Raichu, same with the Igglybuff line, but goddamn, the Cleffa line looks horrible.

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>fire type version of vulpix
God, they're raping alola designs.

>>27483732
Maybe because, THICC is the thinking man's sexual preference.

>>27483732
because he's "down to earth"

Guys I'm at the purple town and I got the sudden urge to cut my wrists. Anyone else feel that way? Brb, turning up the volume on the game boy.

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A pokémon with boobs? This game is pandering to furries!

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>>27485307
>Nidoqueen narrows its eyes seductively as it bounces them

>>27483325
>Grass/Psychic
>All those fucking weaknesses
Goddamn, this poor bastard got fucked over hard both in design and typing for its' Kanto form.

>>27483325
why the fuck is it so short, its supposed to be a palm tree
fucking manlets