Pokemon Fanfiction General and Writethread

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>>25631616
Thanks for making new bread.
Want to continue my story but can't get motivated. Personally I like the Gardevoir couple I've written about because my goal was to create a realistic relationship between them that I could deconstruct in later chapters.

>>25632066
Care to explicate? I'm interested in anything featuring the Ralts line.

>>25631616
No recap this thread?

>>25632915
I'm not even qualified to do that shit, yo

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>>25631616
thanks for new thread.

Here's a recap!

WTDinner shares a small snippet of someone busted with drugs in Goldenrod City. SFW
http://pastebin.com/EKRE2Tga

Raygall comes back from his writing stump with a short snippet of how a community seems to dislike a trainer's relationship with his Weavile. SFW
http://pastebin.com/GGNXMy7h

An anon makes a snippet to explain why Ash really seems to fail the league...SFW
http://pastebin.com/GiWy4a8Y

Updated Fics:
An anon released a few more chapters starting an OC with an interesting quirk. SFW(?)
http://aloepoke.tumblr.com/post/140766545692/chapter-1-the-benign-trainer
http://aloepoke.tumblr.com/post/141167596352/chapter-2-through-the-coronet-tunnels

LuxyStoryAnon is looking for feedback with his new chapter for the PMDish fic he's working on.
http://pastebin.com/Ke8B699P

More Fledglings by Unown.
https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11084689/31/Fledglings

Mimiga makes another Ears chapter.
https://docs.google.com/document/d/1giifMWAAWqaE3gVnoJrXG-biANcVpVfujzHD-8YZOM8/edit?usp=sharing

While crawling through today's new fics I found this unappreciated story today about an PMD expedition gone horribly wrong. The diary format reminds me of that Mawile exploring Destiny Tower fic that got posted here a little while back. Overall it's pretty grim stuff but I thought it was entertaining:

https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11846931/1/Expedition-Log

I'm not much of a battle writer anymore, but one thing has been on my mind. When I first got into fanfic writing, the motto was to not be the anime. Many of us followed the game mechanics more closely since the anime's battles were bullshit, but I got to thinking: was part of that incorrect? I could go on about how I've deconstructed every aspect of battling, including the type chart itself, but the point is maybe the anime had the right idea, but the wrong implementation. Our argument at the core was on the bullshit, and I think everyone knows how to make battles more believable. I don't think we needed to adhere to the type chart to do it, though. Perhaps it's too radical of an idea for most, and maybe I'm only being lazy. I certainly despised having to have a tab open to a movepool reference at all times just to write a battle.

>>25634524
In general, I think a balance needs to be struck. A fic based 100% on game mechanics would end up having Pokemon literally taking turns to punch each other in the face, which kills the mood for quite a bit of scenes. Meanwhile, a fic based 100% on the anime would conflict with audience's knowledge of the game, who will then complain about advantages,disadvantages and the like, and gimmicks would be taken way too far.

In your example, a type chart can show advantages/disadvantages, but that doesn't mean a fight would automatically have to be one sided. In my view, one of the more interesting situations to write about is what tactics are being used by the Pokemon who is at a disadvantage in the fight, whether it would be them using moves they would not normally use in an average fight or being pragmatic and using the environment to even the odds, which is a great hit and miss that the anime...often misses, at least in the past.
One thing I remember that was done quite well was Meowth's 'fight' against Onix (during that togepi egg episode I think?), when Meowth saw that fury swipes did nothing to his opponent, Onix, he used a bucket of water to splash at him, and then clawed at him with fury swipes, now that his rock body has been softened.

>>25634629
That is kind of what I mean, it's just that I feel some of the type alignments exist for an arbitrary reason, but then again, these are also types I don't tend to use. There is indeed a lot to be said of attacks being used in clever ways. The key word is limitation. Your abilities should never be useful for everything, but someone that's truly skilled can work around that. (and also keep in mind if it doesn't make sense for someone to know about this) In some ways, the type chart can exist, but it ultimately means little. As for the rest, that goes into problems I have with pokemon movepools in general, and I could go on forever about that. Let's just say it involved me just wanting the pokemon to use the kind of moves I felt they should have based on their powers and anatomy.

The games provide a canon. The animation and comics bent it to suit their needs. Truly >>25634524 >>25634629 >>25634710 is using a noble goal (optimizing the world to suit a fan fiction format) to excuse bending the canon more.

Any rule may be broken if:
1. It's interesting.
2. It helps you tell the story.
3. It doesn't encourage the reader to quit.
That's an easy way to approach this matter, but enjoying the thought experiment:

Game canon is subtle about it, but gives you plenty to work with. One, type immunity describes opportunity. A Flying-type that uses Roost loses its Flying-type status, not because its wings fall off but because in order to benefit from resting it must commit to not flying around. Thus, it can't leave the ground to escape a subsequent Ground-type attack. I've relied on this immunity-has-a-condition concept a few times, and I believe to a benefit since it adds a little depth to the flat chart and opens character development. (Twice I've portrayed Dark-types who have grown to trust a familiar Psychic enough to let them into their heads. Like giving someone a key to your flat, that's supposed to be a relationship milestone although I don't know if it was ever taken that way by my readers.)

Regarding moves, there's a difference twixt furiously swiping something with claws, and USING Fury Swipes. One's a verb, the other's a combat technique. Many pokemon are able to fly, but canonically they can't carry Trainer to town without being programmed by HM02 and won't unless Trainer has appropriate badges. Translating this into a practical world, a pokemon doesn't know how to carry somebody safely without the HM (Surf, likewise), and although the badges thing is obvious a gate mechanic in the game, the concept of pokemon respecting evidence of competency could factor into a pokemon being willing to obey such a burdensome command. (Vera's attitude in C/E-9 hints at this.)

That said, Pokemon are magic, they can use any technique with the right excuse.

The one matter I have a problem with is that analyzing the movepools enough makes me believe that pokemon are in fact limitless in the powers they can possess. They can draw on any form of power as long as something says they can, it's just that they naturally carry an affinity for certain kinds of power, the types assigned to them. One has to be careful with this, lest any pokemon could become far too powerful for anyone to deal with. Then again, if you can justify that level of skill, then it may in part be believable as long as it involves going against something equally skilled. It is the main principle of something I've long developed with the Aura essentially being the pokemon equivalent of the Force. In my original interpretation, the Aura allows a pokemon to tap into anything their species is capable of, which was essentially a license to use anything that's in their movepool, no matter the source. (TMs, egg moves, etc.) Later, this also became the driving source behind Mega Evolution, freeing up their full potential and realizing their true power. I would later come to think that having that many different elements at their disposal was unfair. It sort of is, but I can see the justification in my own logic as well.

(cont.)

>>25635279
The main point was that I had seen that movepools are very arbitrary, but I also made no effort to make better sense of them. I also ran into the problem of what counts as a definite part of a pokemon's anatomy. This primarily had to do with the matter a lot of Grass pokemon can grow vines for seemingly no reason, or maybe it was rather that certain Grass pokemon are never seen with vines even though they could have them with the same logic that is commonly applied to other Grass pokemon. Similarly, I don't understand why energy-based attacks aren't learnable by ALL pokemon that have an affinity for it. Even for Physical moves, some of them seem to forget that the pokemon have claws, a tail, or other body parts necessary for a certain attack, and others give the pokemon an attack even though they don't have the parts for it. (mostly because the games have to lend a move from a previous form that did have it)


It all makes me so confused as to what a pokemon can really do. Then, I saw what lied underneath all of it: I didn't want to have battles be such a chore to write for, having to keep up a reference just to keep everything straight. I instead experimented with something else. I just wrote what I felt like should happen, with no regard for game information whatsoever. It was fairly straightforward, I did nothing that wouldn't otherwise be common to said pokemon, except for the matter that I don't know if Pikachu can use Dig. It's a burrowing rodent, it made sense to me. It allowed me to concentrate on what I should be doing: the eternal chess game that I do when doing battles. (that being I focus more on tactics than the moves themselves) With more experience, I may be able to depart from conventional moves or at least to make the battle flow more smoothly as the attacks progress naturally. I've always been an advocate of more free-flowing battles where you have to think on your feet.

>>25635279
>>25635287
arguably, you could always say that the developers of TMs are trying to make their moves more compatible with more species of Pokemon, with each one having different efects/methods of using per pokemon or something.

It'd be about the explanation of STAB moves: a pokemon can use it, but not as good/efficient as a pokemon that can learn the move (either on its own or by TM), and even a bigger gap compared to a pokemon with the same typing as that move. Just my thoughts.

>>25631616
>Snivy will never sit on your head
CRAWLINGGGGGGGG

There are times I wish I could make the world where humans and pokemon are truly equal, but I don't think I have the strength, and it's possibly the reason I write for pokemon only.

>>25637684
Pokemon among themselves are not equal.

Could your wish be granted—be it either through diminishing pokemon or aggrandizing humanity—what would make a story in that context more interesting than a story set in an environment where the protagonists are naturally equivalent?

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>>25633244
>tfw posted but no feedback
>tfw pretty sure is still shit anyway but still writing for some reason

>>25637881
That is more the reason. I have no premise for it, only to counter the insufferable gamerfags. To do so would invalidate the purpose of humans at all, though. Basically, I don't get why the human and pokemon bond exists to start with. What are they getting from it that they can't get themselves, or from other pokemon? Unless that's the point, it's simply another option for doing the same thing. I'd never be able to do a traditional trainer fic, though. I hate the premise, it's way too arrogant for me. I'd one way or another end up deconstructing everything having to do with it. Slice of life only works for me as a one-shot. I'm also ill equipped to say anything about something resembling a sport. I don't know what goes into it or how it functions. Realize you're better suited for another profession? That makes it sound too preachy, and I'm sure it's been done before. All in all, it's something that's only full of hate, and I can't justify it.

>>25638124
>I don't get why the human and pokemon bond exists to start with
Probably the same reason there's a relationship today with people and animals, whether as pets and attractions or livestock and food and whatnot.

>>25638124
Fighting without risk of being impaled to death?

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>>25638314
Impaled, burned, frozen, sliced, liquefied, crushed, poisoned, exploded, shot, there's a lot of ways to wind up dead in the pokemon world. The fact humans survive at all is a miracle.
Which reminds me, I still need two more deaths for that Pokemon/1000 Ways to Die fic

>>25638290
*seething* That is exactly the kind of mentality I mean to counter. *normal* Pokemon are not mere animals to me.

>>25638379
Unfortunately, there isn't much else to base this sort of relationship off of, unless you want to start studying how people from different cultures interact with each other (like Japan and the western world, or the closer bond between them and the Dutch), to either make trade possible for mutual/symbiotic relationships or act as parasites in disguise of allies.

I've never written a fanfiction before, but I'd like to start. Any advice?

>>25638420
And even then those interactions occur in the natural world too.
Honestly, the only reason creatures (humans included) interact with others nonviolently is mostly because there are benefits for doing so, whether short or long term

>>25638074
Posting does not cause an author to be owed feedback, and silence is feedback of its own.

But I'll try, despite only reading about 1/3rd and barely skimming the rest.

As briefly as I can put it, you've split your story into two threads by moving MC from PKMN to PMD worlds, which leaves the PKMN thread without a protagonist, forces a second dose of establishment down the readers' throats, and puts You in a position of having to juggle the priority of which plot is most interesting at any point in time, and that's hard when the PKMN plot is now a stock "oh noes X is missing" damaged by the audience knowing that X is gone to where PKMN's cast won't find him (all their efforts are futile until the status quo changes) and PMD thread is effectively a different story happening in the PKMN story's .txt file since the amnesia aspect means it'll be a while before this thread becomes part of the whole story.
And that's a shame because there was a huge opportunity to bend PMD to fit this story's premise and it whizzed right by.
Also I could rant for a while about the problems your PKMN thread has, resulting from the hole where MC was, but that complication is pandora's box.

This is a hard write for you and a harder read for us, doubly so for we who are not PMD savvy. Unless you're hoping to receive $0/hour proof-reading/editor work, I don't see this Chapter 2 *earning* much feedback, when it is a graphic portrayal of how to lose all the momentum that a decently peppy first chapter bequeathed to it.

>>25638420
Interesting...I've never thought of pokemon as a separate culture before, even though I am aware their way of thinking must be terribly different from what most would consider normal. However, this way of thinking is not something that I personally have a problem with. I cannot present it as something that people would generally seek. That's okay, though. I am perfectly fine with only pokemon.

>>25638461
nevahgiveup.png

Find an idea/plot/cute thing you like, and then try to expand on it. Jot down all the things you think could happen, scratch out a nice outline, and eventually start a first draft. It will be really shit, all first drafts are. Then you edit. And edit. And edit. And edit. And then hate yourself for a while, and then edit some more. Then you share with people, get a mix of useful feedback and stupidity, and then you either touch up what you shared, or you start all over with the next chapter.
Never let yourself get discouraged by skill, practice makes perfect etc. etc., but seriously, if you expect to start writing like a pro at step 1, you'll be disappointed. Go read an essay from a 3rd grader, you'll get my meaning. You have to actually practice writing to get better.
Also don't disregard constructive criticism, it really does help a lot. Your writing will have flaws, but actual critics want to show you so you can improve.

>>25638124
Perhaps Pokemon is not a suitable environment for your writing. Have you considered Digimon, Monster Rancher, or Yokai Watch?

>>25638461
Do you have a concept in mind?

>>25638603
According to you, none of those would be suitable since they all canonically involve an unavoidable human/monster relationship. I'm only familiar with Digimon and Monster Rancher, and they both feature something I still find to be lopsided. Again, the humans are only an accessory. They don't really do anything.

>>25638701
Then write about Planet Robot which is populated by robots, all one kind of robot, and the robots sit around agreeing that they are all identical in a robotic fashion.
>#1 on the Robot York Times best seller list forever.

>>25638772
I don't think anything I said implied I want everyone to be the same, how am I supposed to make an equal partnership for something that isn't equal? Not even the given scenario for pokemon can do that.

>>25638124
Seems to me like you have a decent angle to work from already right there in that post. Focused on a character that seeks reason behind the norms of the Human-Pokémon relationship, you could throw it in as a researcher angled project with a character that had foregone the usual route of being a Pokemon trainer to focus on academics and now goes back in to study it as an outsider.

>>25638835
You could give humans armor and weapons that replicate pokemon's moves, abilities, and stats as justification.

>>25638701
Well for Digimon, depending on which Canon you choose, a human could avoid contact with digimon completely, but only if said people aren't familiar with technology. And probably vice versa.

In essence, you could try recreating that first contact in your view, with both sides not knowing about each other

>>25638843
That'd be more of the premise for a pretend thesis, and I'm too lazy to do that. Even if I could, I doubt I'd come to a favorable conclusion. Not unless we can ignore conventional methods and propose a relationship that has no real practical purpose, but exists for more emotional reasons instead.

>>25638879
>weapons that replicate pokemon's moves
Trainer Gene Starwind has no more caster shells!
Gene Starwind used STRUGGLE!

How viable would a fic featuring secret agent and his/her Phione using Heart Swap be? While a Phione does use Heart Swap in the PokeSpecial Manga IIRC, Phione doesn't learn Heart Swap in the games, and I don't want to give him a Manaphy.

>>25640903
see >>25634974

While the Phione might be a bit of a special snowflake compared to the other Phiones, if you can make it interesting you can do whatever.

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>>25638584
This desu.
I keep failing my own standards, and it feels shit. Yet I always come back to it by some weird masochistic instinct. I'm not god at planning, as anybody that reads my stuff can see. I also tend to make entire scenes in my head, and then place them within the fic, only to condense them because they seem too long. I'm too concise, I guess. And I hit another block due to lack of planning, and I'm not motivated to fix it. Sorry to anybody that enjoys my fics, it may be a while, probably a month. At least I keep trying though, I just have to make my stories sound less like essays.
Good luck to new writers though, it's not always as bad as we make it sound!

>>25643683
tfw reading a really shitty smutfic and getting a shame boner

>>25645346
It happens to the best of us anon.

>That insanely long character-insert fic where you basically just replace Ash and his gang with your own characters and run through all the generations from start to present.

Am I the only one with this idea niggling in the back of their mind?

Because as faggy as it is, I'm always tempted to work on something like this.

>>25645370
I think about that too.
And then decide against trying to write it for obvious reasons.

>>25645370
Everyone wants their own journey fic!

>>25645370
I say it's about the equivalent of everyone wanting to write their own PMD story

>>25648598
I only copy MD by only having pokemon. The setting and plot are often of my own design.

>>25638900
Humans are not perfectly logical creatures. When it comes down to it, we will pursue seemingly insignificant things for the sake of even the smallest bit of emotional comfort. Hell, even animals have been shown to do this. Remember that experiment with the baby monkeys forced to choose between the metal monkey dispensing food and the fuzzy plush monkey with no food? They all starved to death because they stayed with the plush one for the sake of emotional comfort. Practical physical gains, while important in the long run, are simply not what many higher functioning organisms are necessarily wired for, even if that is not conducive to survival. A relationship with a partner Pokemon doesn't have to save your MC 10% on car insurance for it to be a very real and beneficial influence on his life. You as the author do not have to agree with your MC's interpretation of what he gets out of it--you simply have to make it believable and relatable to the reader.

>>25640903
Go for it. Phione a cute. And I'm pretty sure few people will actually remember that it can't use that move, considering its close relation to Manaphy.

>>25648859
Well, the idea fascinates me, as indeed, the two are related, but Phione was made to be essentially a gimped Manaphy. I then realized I don't understand why that is. It should be a counterpart in every way, but instead, it's like a joke on the players so Manaphy can have it's own egg. Perhaps all of this does invalidate how Phione is portrayed in that sense, but there could also be something about cold water that gives Manaphy it's powers. That would still make me go into the semantics about why we never get Manaphy except by events. What, you need colder than the waters of Sinnoh? What do you want, the flipping Arctic Circle?

Well, Manaphy seems to be connected to the Pokemon Rangers. The Manaphy eggs can only be gotten in the Pokemon Ranger games and events, and in Guardian Signs Phiones can be encountered as normal encounters IIRC.

Maybe somewhere around the Ranger regions (Fiore, Almia, and Oblvia) are places where Manaphy can breed the right eggs instead of the gimped ones in the games themselves.

Also there is the thing that the Manaphy eggs are connected to Sinnoh in a way, as they've stopped making Pokemon Ranger sequels when the Gen V games came out, and thus you can only transfer the Manaphy eggs directly to the Gen IV games (Definitely the Sinnoh games, IDK about the Johto Remakes)

>>25649548
Yes, Phione is in Guardian Signs, though that is not connected to the presence of Manaphy. It is always presented as something that drifted from an unknown location. At least it makes sense, though. Oblivia is a tropical region, Manaphy eggs can't be made there.

Optimistic bump question!

Weirdest/most abstract/trippiest story, idea, piece of writing regarding the Pokémon series that you've ever laid your unholy eyes on?

>>25645370

It's funny because hidden deep within the depths of my old laptop's hard drive is a OC Journey fic that I started more than years ago and work on from time to time. For five years, I don't have much (only a 100 pages or so), but it's like a goddamn slice of the earth for my writing, you can what my writing mature in some areas and stagnate in others.

Damn, I've promised myself to continue Chapter 5 for about a week now and yet I haven't touched it at all. I've written a few lines today but I'm not really satisfied with them so I'll probably rewrite them later. Hopefully the chapter will be done by Easter or something.

So how do most writers here deal with procrastinating/slacking off? I used to write all day when I had just started, but nowadays I take a few breaks every once in a while, although I'm currently on an extremely long break.

>>25651770
I've been writing aggressively hard for the last almost year, and the longest hiatus I've ever taken is just about right now (Splatfest, Pokken, totally not my fault)

I'd assume that the only think that completely keeps you from getting into a writing groove is mood and atmosphere, because if not then what you're writing isn't even interesting to you. I usually just find music from bands I like that sorta fits the setting and let it hype me up enough to make words happen.

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Requesting something that I'm not sure is in the Google Doc.

Some anon mentioned that there was a Serperior bully story like Quilava Isn't Cute Enough. Is there a link for that?

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>>25631616
TOTT: Unfortunately, from a Pokemon standpoint I've got only Johannes, Viola, Unnamed Maison Patron, and a guy who got his brain completely fried by psychic energy to choose from.

I'd probably pick Johannes since he's the most fleshed out.

From all my characters, original or otherwise, that I've ever written, it'd either be what I have so far for Valkut, the straightman rogue who finds the world of fleshmancy to be a bit too strange for his liking, or Ylvia, a Coefin spellthief who is as promiscuous as she is witty.

>>25651770
I can't speak for "most," but the easiest way to get writing when you're not writing is to start writing. The cost of this is trusting your muse to be your editor and letting her gut what you thought your next chapter was about. It's not that hard when you accept that if your half-baked idea was truly working for your story, you would've never slowed down or stopped in writing it before expressing said idea.

(My Next Fic) Chapter 8 has been blocking me up, so I sat down and wrote from the vague premise I had and let it completely ignore the "point" of the scene (and since the chapter title was a reference to what I expected to have happen there…but it still works) so I was "disappointed" that the scene seemed like a waste of time (writer's and readers'; all it seems to be doing now is making an elaborate excuse to hint at an explanation for something that happened in the previous scene) but coming out of that scene, the next started writing itself and before I knew it, Main Pokemon Character accidentally explained a lot of his personality quirk which until then felt like it was phoned-in (albeit adroitly as I am wont to do even when taking the easy route) and gave the chapter a good resolution to mostly close Act 2. Mostly because I still need a few thousand words to make the chapter "short," a problem with this story that I bitched about a few threads ago, and because I need to transition the circumstances a little. Probably will make 9 the gear shift and 10+11 the climax and conclusion. Or something else will happen. Writing is an adventure, full of surprises everywhere you turn.

I'm looking to find a certain fanfic that I hope someone here has heard of. I read it maybe 15 years ago on some website (not a fanfic website) and I think it was about the Missingno virus corrupting all other Pokemon and turning them basically rabid. One scene in particular was a professor being eaten alive by a hoard of Ratatta in his own home. I think something was wrong with the E4 also because I remember Ash having to fight a brainwashed or whatever Lorelei, and she had the Lapras that Ash had set free. It ends with Ash facing off with the source of the corruption, the Missingno. I don't remember much but if anyone remembers anything please reply.

Hey, can any anons recommend some decent team rocket fics? I don't even care what they're about, just as long as they're not shit.

>>25652008
there are two if I remember. Both unrelated, but 4chan archive is down so I can't fish up the other one.
http://pastebin.com/VzTsLcgZ

>>25652808
Thank you!

>tott
A small asian child who I reuse for many stories, including fanfiction (OC donut steel). Every incarnation of her involves her family trying to kill her using elaborate folk rituals. I'm a huge Fatal Frame fag so the family is heavily influenced by that. Why raise your daughter past adolescence when you can sacrifice her to seal the gate to hell?

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>>25648598
>Rewriting the entire anime with your own characters
>equivalent to using PMD as a setting

>>25654578
No, Charizard. Belly DRUM, not belly laugh.

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As I attempt to navigate this terrible writer's block for Second Autumn 5, I wonder - what's your opinion on yuri /vp/?

I fucking love it and I think I might do some of that when I've finished SA.

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>>25654752
I think Yuri is a pretty cool guy. Eh pioneers space and doesn't afraid of weightlessness.

>>25654917
Чepт пoбepи тoвapищa.

>>25652253
I read something on fucking Usenet nearly 15 years ago that's similar to this but not precise.

I think it was called "The Curse of Missingno." As I recall it was set solely on Cinnabar Island and the scene that sticks in my head the most was Ash trying to comfort Pikachu as it slowly turned into a Missingno after encountering the original one. That was what it did - it turned its victims into Missingnos, I don't remember them being rabid.

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>>25645346
Was this related to the quote?

>>25655235
Thanks for your reply. I enjoy stories that feature Missingno and the one you describe sounds very interesting. While I don't recall much, I do specifically remember Pokemon remaining their species, but just turning crazy and very aggressive. The fight with Lorelei did take place on or around Cinnabar Island though. It was near the end of the fix, like Lorelei was trying to stop Ash from reaching where Missingno dwelled. When you mentioned the bit with Pikachu, I was suddenly reminded of the ending to the fic. Missingno had begun to corrupt reality itself and it was basically a race against time to defeat it or else their dimension would be destroyed. I am pretty sure that Ash and Pikachu did not survive the battle, but managed to stop Missingno in the end.

It was a very long time ago but I remember it being such a fantastic read. I'd love to read it again if I could ever find it.

>>25655747
no i just did a quick reply because im lazy and forgot to remove it

>>25654752
I think it's cute

>>25652808
>>25653593
here's the other one
http://pastebin.com/TpdwpvxG

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>>25643683
Me by the way. I've been busy with concerts and school too. brb killing myself.

>>25643683
>I'm too concise
Were you too concise, you would write short and then feel a need to expand it to better fit what's expected of literature, not vice versa. You are editing for duration instead of for efficiency.
>I hit another block due to lack of planning
I find minimal planning to be optimal, and discarding plans to be liberating (>>25652127) so really you're saying that you're afraid to step into the darkness.
>I just have to make my stories sound less like essays.
Essays are epitome Tells, so axe whatever is most Telling. Have no thesis statement, no recap at the end, and let your paragraphs (and their "points") blend together.

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>>25660687
Worded that badly. I feel like if I put too much detail into a scene, it will be tedious to read. I just haven't found my comfort zone yet. I'd like to plan lots more, I just feel like it would be easier for me to map everything out before I start typing. I'm just finding my voice I suppose. You were right about the essay thing though. Thanks for the feedback.

>>25660944
>if I put too much detail into a scene, it will be tedious to read.
This is a question of pacing. If the action is fast, don't stop for details. If it's a scene that wants to soak in, show us everything that helps us envision the stage.

>I just feel like it would be easier for me to map everything out before I start typing.
Define "easy."
But you already started when you wrote the outline. Not that that's wrong, I'm sure many authors choose that method, but truly you are designing a plot and then writing meat onto its bones later. The cost of doing this is born by the characters who must act according to the predetermined plot. If you're really good, your characters will naturally do so and the story will be a masterpiece. I'm miles from really good, so I just stick a few pins on the map as "maybe I'll go there at some point"-s, pick one to start with, and let my characters run around until they turn into what they want to become and go where they want to take me.

lol, I'm such a lazy hack that I imagine characters and then leave it to them to write their own stories for me and then I take all the credit for typing them out.

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>>25661131
Now that is some good constructive criticism my friend. I find that teaching others or working together with someone to learn something increases my understanding of a subject, so maybe I can do some of what you're doing with helping me. Maybe do some reviews on FFN or something, I don't know.

>>25662177
Attempting to teach something is the surest way to reveal which parts of the subject you wrongly believe yourself to understand. It is a step on the road to mastery, but your pupil is suffered to pay a portion of your fare—be considerate, or remain a collaborator.

Reviewing the work of others is also a matter for discretion. While it gives you an opportunity to hone your cutting room's cutters, only an already expert editor will swing the blade without striking the author, completely without malice perhaps but also completely without a means to amend. When I came to this realization, I stopped reading and reviewing except when both critical review is requested and I sense from the attitude of the author that a genuine desire to improve *may* lurk within. Otherwise, it amounts to the reviewer wasting hours to make something that is received as warmly as a five-second trolling insult. My blocks of time are too potentially-productive and my five-second insults too potent to schedule them reversed. So I suggest that you do read and review, but do not send the result; retain them for your own reference so you may judge future improvement in your editing skill by re-reviewing select pieces later. You benefit from the exercise and you also do not burn any bridges with a match left un-struck.

Collaboration is an intriguing idea, as I don't see much of it. I attempted to get this crew working concomitantly with "collaboratively" as a goal, but as is the way of all internet, the initial response was a deluge and the premiere result was a few droplets. I have little hope that a collaborative effort will emerge here, not for want of talent but of dedication. If you seek interaction with this thread, you'll probably be best served by writing drabbles and scene drafts, presenting them via pastebin, than by hoping to recruit a study circle. It doesn't help that this thread has such diversity in taste: Could any two here coherently merge their disparate visions?

>>25662561
That's some erudite shit to be talking about on a weaboo image forum on a board about japanese cartoon creatures in the thread where smut and failed dreams are made.

>>25663445
as long as there's people open to learn it's worth the effort, at least in my eyes.

Would anybody be interested in sidney x bruno porn?

>>25664156
who and who?
Well, if you got a fic to share, just make sure to link it offsite on a pastebin or something.

>>25664214
No, i'm just writing it now and was wondering if anyone was interested.

>>25664347
I'm interested, there's barely any yaoi that doesn't include shota or pokephilia, but I guess you can include that if you really want it.

Question for all you fanfic writers and readers: how do you feel about Wattpad's Pokemon fanfictions, assuming you manage to find an author who isn't twelve and or a shitty writer?

After midterms, losing my laptop for a few days, and my parents making me clean the entire house...I'M BACK, BABY!

Now, I have a question to ask. Is it too much of a shout out to have a hedonistic Sylveon with pheromone powers? He's a sociopath and the leader of a small mob who uses his Fairy-type aura to keep his minions "safe," grants pleasure and loyalty to his supporters, and causes pain and fear so nobody actually challenges him. He captures Ais when she's out scouting. This is for two reasons: It's a way for Rin to connect with her when he sneaks into the camp, challenges the Sylveon, and beats the shit out of him through the fear and pain pheromones because the Sylveon's actually weak when you get past that, and it gives her a reason to be frightened of evolving(what if it makes her into a sociopath too?)

>>25665298

I read all fanfiction even if its bad, because then I can isolate why its bad and avoid that for future pieces I write.

>>25665298
Jesus I didn't know this thing even existed.

I have no opinion I suppose. Is this just meant to be a story sharing platform - fanfic or otherwise?

i just want a mindbreak breeding fanfic pls

>>25665482
can you specify what a mindbreak breeding fic is?

>>25665486
We had one here a year ago.

>Gardevoir loves human.
>Gardevoir bonks human.
>Not compatible.
>Makes dud eggs.
>AND WILL CONTINUE TO UNTIL IT WORKS.
>...because otherwise, why live? Hint hint.

>>25665615
God damn it, someone wrote about Viola's inability to grasp incompatibility already. ;_;

>>25665648
In a big way.

>>25665648
If you try hard enough everything is compatible.

>>25665683
...said the SAE to the metric.

>And then she stripped for him.

>>25665683
Were it so easy.

Quick question, would sidney have stereotypical speech mannerisms for a biker/greaser/bad boy ?

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so I'm about to give a shot at writing a fic for pic related - team rocket ash and misty chasing after twerp trainers jessie and james in order to steal their rare talking meowth,

I'm not quite sure what I should do about their ages though, Should I keep them as in anime canon, where ash and misty are younger, or swap them around so that they are older? Or hell, I could even break it evenly and make them all around the same age.

Any suggestions?

>>25665298
Honestly, I haven't been on wattpad since my friend showed it to me in 7th grade.

>>25665776
I suggest that you keep the ages as they are canonically. If you change the ages, you also change their backstories, which is far more complicated to do and not change their core personalities than to simply take the canon characters and write in "except Jessie and James straightened up in adolescence while Misty learned about Giovanni's double life, challenged his ass because he runs a lot of Water-weak, joined up, and later brought in Ash because Rocket's all about those unusually-powerful Pikachus." (Season one plot line out of nowhere!)

>>25665938
Not the original person you were talking to, but do you have any common pitfalls when writing M/M porn?

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>>25666011

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>>25666011

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>>25665938
Well, I figure I'd have to swap a shitton around to begin with, using their canon backstories without changing anything is pretty difficult to do in a situation like this.

I was thinking that James bargained with his parents to avoid marrying Jessiebelle - If he could become the pokemon league champion, it would mean that he wasn't a lazy good for nothing, and he could be considered a man free to make his own choices. Meeting up with Jessie was by chance, and she insisted on coming with him if only to prove to that obnoxious Jessiebelle that being a rich bitch doesnt make you better than somebody who is poor. Jessiebelle was here, Jessie is a loser!

Misty is in team rocket because her sisters fucked up with the Gym, and wound up owing Giovanni a shitton of money, so she got stuck as the poor sod who had to work for him in order to pay it all back.

The only one whose backstory really changes when it comes to ages, I think, would be Ash. If he's younger, I could see it being that he had nowhere else to go, and team rocket took him in. If he's older, it could be that he challenged Giovanni, and lost but still piqued the Boss-man's interest.

>>25666034
>>25666043

Is this something taboo? I was assuming it was fine to ask because of the nsfw fics linked in thread along with the mindbreak breeder request. I apologize though if i've made you uncomfortable.

>>25666078
No, I think it's more that you asked that out of literally fucking nowhere.

>>25666088
Oh, that's understandable.

>>25666064
You already know what you want to do.
Get writing.

>>25666078
>See the most vocal "lemons are lame" critic in the thread.
>Ask him for tips on writing lemons.
>Press button, receive bacon.

>>25666119

I can't find one in this thread, are they disguising themselves using internet lingo? I had to search up what lemons meant aside from the popular citrus fruit,

>>25666160
Let's start over.

>>25666011
I don't specialize in M/M porn, and although I'm confident I could probably do a snappy job of it if I wanted to, I don't have the necessary combination of time and inclination conducive to speculating upon what difficulties would have arisen as learning experiences for those who have specialized in that genre.
Perhaps somebody else does and will assist you.

>>25666160
Lemons are general fics with porn in them, usually sweet/straightforward ones (they meet, fall in love, drama, lewd it up, etc). They are almost always NSFW.
Cge probably isn't a fan of them or something

>>25666202

Thank you, and I apologize if I made you uncomfortable.

>>25666221
A slice of lemon is fine with a tall beverage, but I would not consider a basket of lemons for an entree.

>>25666299
So when I write something, it should have sustenance besides the actual lemon? Yet again i'm assuming this time you're making the comparison that the lemon is the porn and the drink is the story, and you wouldn't want just lemons?

>>25666315
When *you* write something, you should write what you want to write.

When I write a complete feature, I aspire to communicate a moral, a personal opinion, an exploration of a topic that I think has been overlooked, and to relate experiences themselves unique or from unique perspectives.

Statistics regarding views and comments show that my interests are not shared by the majority of people who indulge in (at least the Pokemon sub-genre of) fan fiction, and specifically important to you, those whose interests include M/M intercourse as a core topic.

>>25666315
not him, but that's usually the case for lemons, so that the reader has a reason for the characters to care for each other other than having specific pairings uh, 'butting each other in the butt'

>>25666377
Is it possible to create this when the pairing is portrayed as simply a one night stand?

>>25666374
>tfw lost interest in lemons more and more as time continued
>tfw SA still contains 3 limes because it facilitated plot

I love fluff and innuendo, but god damn, I can't escape so I just wound up using sex as a point of contention or a vehicle to drive interactions. At least it works, right?

>>25666451
Create care for the characters you mean? You can, it just depends on how you do it. I wrote a one-night stand once and it went over decently well, but people were more concerned over one of the characters being somewhat OOC. Not sure what they expected from two drunks that have no real reason to be in a room together longer than their own friends dictate.

>>25666488
>right?
Do you have to ask if it does?

>>25666731
You know, it was mostly rhetorical. But a part of me seeks validation from other people because I just hate my work that much. Alas.

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>>25631616
Did roseanon ever finish his roselia story?

>>25665433
you really like Braver, don't cha?
You should be fine Ithink, as long as you don't suffer from the naming crisis again.
>>25666913
went into a creative stump of sorts. Only released 1-2 Minty snippets too. Kinda stinks.

>>25666959
IT WAS REALLY FUCKING GOOD, OKAY, BEST PMD FIC I'VE EVER READ, WHY DID HE STOP WRITING

...Okay, calm now. The point is, I'm not going to be doing that again. He's not even going to have a name. The downside is, I need to come up with a title for a Caligula-like, decadent cult leader to refer to himself by.

>>25666855
If you hated what you've written, then you would leap at the chance to re-design it from your newly matured perspective and then have something that you hate less. Instead, you choose to excuse yourself. You seek validation not for your writing's sake, but for your cheating it out of becoming the story it could be and yourself out of being that story's author.

Alas.

>>25667125
Bah, hardly. Validation keeps me going (to some extent anyway), hatred keeps me striving. It's why I was never happy with anything I did in college, even the things my professors told me were actually worthy of being published - I always looked to what I could have done better, even amid praise.

Then again, I'm not one to go back and completely rewrite something that I've already deemed finished, so maybe you've got a point.

>>25659778
Belated thanks

>>25667125
Why have you, of all people, inspired me with your words? I shall continue my story with haste, though I also wish to edit my previous work. What is an author to do when he feels the crushing weight of his desire to continue coupled with the frustration of mistakes he has made in the past? Is one direction to outmatch the other, ultimately determining the direction of the story, and if so who can say but the author himself?

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>>25666986
Audino why he stopped writing.

>>25667782
Speaking of being a lopunny, do 'good' puns ever exist or are they all labeled as bad puns just for namesake?

>>25659778
Damn, I really hope both of those writers snap out of their writers block some day

>IT WAS REALLY FUCKING GOOD, OKAY, BEST PMD FIC I'VE EVER READ, WHY DID HE STOP WRITING
Link to the fic? Im interested.

>>25670639
it's in the catalog under SFW tab.
https://www.fanfiction.net/s/10131562/1/If-I-Was-Just-a-Little-Braver

>>25670639
Warning: He stopped before getting to the dramatic parts of Sky. Which is slightly irritating, but what can you do. Were you ever going to do that?

>>25667782
I'd say it's too early in the morning for puns, but that presumes at some point there's a correct time for them.

>>25665481
The original purpose of Wattpad was meant to be a site for aspiring authors to come and post their works in hopes of getting published. But that's really not what it is at all today. Fanfictions have taken over. Mostly shitty band fanfictions where the reader inserts herself to fall in love with some hot celebrity guy. There is a Pokemon side to this community though with tournaments and such from what I've seen through lurking. While most stories are shit you can stumble across some real gems.

>>25672175
The endless loop of writing struggles

>>25672964
More like typing up chapters so fast it makes your head spin.

No chapters finished for the past year and a half. Feels terrible.

>>25673092
>No (PKMN) stories finished for two years.
>But that's changing soon.

>>25673210
Are you me?
I've been writing other things (generic science fiction that I wanted to publish) but my primary fiction from pokemon keeps nagging me back to it.

>>25673323
Nah. I just threw the parentheses in there to stimulate conversation. And it worked. :D

>>25673476
Well, you got your wish then. Now we are talking.

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>>25673517
>wishes
are weighty things

>>25673579
How so? Aren't they just uttered words? Or do desires go beyond what is said?

>>25631616
I want to squeeze that belly.

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>>25672175

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>>25671163
Behind the scenes talk: It was gonna diverge a lot from Sky after Spring Town.

>>25673053
>>25673210
Hype

>>25675792
Partly because I decided to let 8 be short and get started on 9. Got the cold open (this is a pun, and like >>25673579 what I mean by it won't make sense until the story is read) and the first narrator-driven scene done, plus some dialogue because I can't help it. So, 1.6k closer to whatever it's going to be in total. I'm not sure if 10 will be enough or if 12 will be needed, so I'm still expecting 60k-70k.

I'm also debating if I start posting before it's done. LL was the only one and I promised myself I wouldn't, but because of a thematic reason, I really want to start posting it sooner.

>>25675768
>implying I would have minded
I would have been happy as long as you kept writing and actually resolved the character arcs. Now I'll never know if Blue beats that thing in his dreams or not, or if he ever gets the better of Feyley, or if Fee finally manages to break Barie's composure, and it makes me sad.

>>25678166
Post-as-you-go is a big responsibility.
Look what you've done, guy who didn't finish.
>you didn't cherish D-PMD-W's smile.

>>25678325
I quit SMD because I couldn't do it justice - basically, I was writing the game with the MC being a snarky little asshole and adding in just a little bit of worldbuilding and making sense. Honestly, that's kind of a boring fic. Which is why I am going all out on this one, so I can actually git gud.

>And it was at this moment that Doomed realized that it was not in fact SadIdiot replying to him and ribbing him about his first attempt, but someone else entirely. In that moment, he knew - he fucked up.

>>25678369
>And it was at this moment that cge realized that not only is signing with a trip not enough to promote positive identification, but that his comment being targeted at whoever might be the author of whatever unfinished fic was being talked about was not communicated.

At least the thread's getting posts. *freeshrugs.jpg*

how do i get back into the mood for writing lewd fetish garbage fics?

>>25678502
imaginative writing exercise. Either open up a blank page or get a paper and pencil, come up with a simple topic, write what's on your mind, and don't stop until you get to the end. No spell checking or going back, just move forward.

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>>25678502
>look at a bunch of cute and/or semi-lewd images of your favorite pairing/mon/girl/boy/attack helicopter
>keep fucking looking at those images
>god fucking damn this is fucking cute
>god fucking damn i am writing some fluffy smut right fucking now

that's how it always went for me

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>>25678325

>>25676018
>plus some dialogue because I can't help it

Good, your dialogue is always the highlight of the story.

>>25676018
>Four hours later.
>2000 words more.
>More like typing up chapters so slow it makes your head bored.

>>25679017
Well, this one isn't as chatty as the chattiest chapters in LL, but all but two of its chapters are spending plenty of time between the good old quotation marks.

>>25678531
oh shit I totally forgot this is an option too.

>>25679555
Yeah, it's a major driving factor behind a fair chunk of the smut and fluff I've written throughout my entire writing "career."

I'm just a huge sucker for cute things too. And as a result, I'm trying pretty hard not to give into making too much of this chapter fluffy.

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>>25679610
>Try to make a cute fluff
>Tens of thousands of words of plot and suffering
>The only smut I've ever written started with suffering

I'm not cut out for this shit

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>>25679665
Nothin' wrong with fluff becoming pain and vice versa. It's what happened to SA.

Then again, if this is something that always happens to you, you have my apologies.

>>25679796
I mean, I suppose using real life experiences as a base for my fluff is kind of a poor idea since I've had some pretty dank suffering in my time.

>>25679883
Just focus on the positives. I got a lot of really good material/ideas for fluff from my relationship, as terribly as it ended. And was. And started.

Jesus, I really did just try desperately to focus on the positives. At least it means I didn't get married at 23 like I thought I was going to.

>>25680012
Oh don't fuckin worry, the positive was that I am now a professional big spoon so that should definitely shine through

>>25678369
You tried writing another MD fic prior to the one now?

Read all of cge's stuff and Power Trip as recommended by some of you folks. They were great, holy shit.

Anyone else got some recommendations? I'm holding off on Ears since I haven't played SMD yet.

>>25682579
I wrote three and a bit chapters of a Super fic. It kinda sucked, mainly because the plot drags you around by the nose and I couldn't write it properly without it just being a novelization of the game. I don't think that makes for a good fic. Then I got screwed over by college, and currently my Honors Psych professor has decided it's fine to have every single project for the entire semester due within a week of each other, so I may get a few delays on this fic. I mean, a few more. Hopefully I'll be able to at least write properly over the summer.

Also, I've got another question I'd like to ask for plotting purposes: When you think of a legendary, what non-legendary Pokemon can you associate with it? What could be their priest (or priestess, if they are a divinity?) So far, I have
>Lati@s: Plusle/Minun
>Darkrai: Dusknoir (because plot)
>Cresselia: Musharna
>Diancie: Gardevoir
Maybe Celebi could have Grovyle, just as another Sky reference, but I don't know.

Found some dead fic about aa Roxanne involving Wally. It seemed like it was going to go somewhere before author abandoned it.
Just thought to share because why not.
https://docs.google.com/document/d/1M5L4Ud8TIzi0GeNo0MHM0VlAe0TUld-W7QUBZ0FVPak/

>>25682632
Silver Resistance is enormous and the primary inspiration behind many PMD stories.
https://www.fanfiction.net/s/4298303/1/Pok%C3%A9mon-Mystery-Dungeon-Silver-Resistance

The Game of Champions is by far the best darker and edgier take on pokemon. It's amazing, but horribly slow to update. It's been over a year since the last update was posted, but I heard recently that the author is actively working on it. Regardless, it's definitely worth reading.
https://www.fanfiction.net/s/7354757/1/The-Game-of-Champions

Pedestal is a story that people seem to swear by. I've never read it personally, but I've seen it recommended often enough to mention it.
https://www.fanfiction.net/s/4871317/1/Pedestal

The best way I've found to find decent stories is to check the favorite stories of any author you like or any dedicated/detailed reviewers they have. You can also just browse sorted by favorites, but...that's a surprisingly poor indicator of quality.

>>25682670
>honors psych
Fucking hell I would kill myself. I hate humanities and that's where all the honors classes are. I wish you luck, fellow masochist.

>>25682945
Read each of those, all are great in their own way. I also wish GOC would update soon, its been so long.

Also, I find that sorting by reviews gets slightly better results. But that also tends to give huge stories with many chapters at the top. No problem for me, but it kinda narrows the options.

I just can't seem to find lesser known gems, most of the newer fics I see and look at just have the most atrocious writing, and usually make no sense.

>>25683365
*I read

>>25683285
Why don't people like humanities? I loved those courses, but I also did extremely well without much effort or even reading the material half the time. Are they that tedious to others?

and now I have a lit degree

>>25683470
They're a fucking hassle and the teachers are usually, in my experience, women who take their subject way too seriously. The classes are never hard (I'm another one of those losers who effortlessly write A papers) theyre just terribly tedious and feel absolutely pointless. Mainly though my problem is that I hate school.

Tl;dr blog shit

>>25683470
If you get tricked into reading every single detail of required texts, you'll have a bad time with most humanities related studies. I always just make sure to get the main points and interpret accordingly.
There's also the whole 'humanities is olf, outdated, dead' thing going on

>>25683515
True most of my professors were women. They were all pretty fucking chill though. Maybe I lucked out.

>>25683518
This explains everything. Poor bastards. I should've told them just too take good notes.

>tfw you spend ten minutes writing a post on mobile because the Internet's out
>tfw you lose that post because you're listed as b& on a board you've never posted on
Just fuck my shit up

>>25684138
>Spent 600 seconds writing.
>Didn't spend 2½ seconds saving to a file just in case.
Penny wise, pound foolish.

>>25684271
Fuck, how was I supposed to know? It was on mobile anyway, it's a pain in the ass to do. I've never even POSTED on /int/, let alone tried to evade a ban.

>>25662561
Wow.

It's been a long time since I last wrote any fanfiction but all this talk sure makes me want to go back to it.

Too bad I never know where to start a pokemon fic.

>>25685429
Start at the beginning.

Asinine, I know, but it's actually relevant. Basically, you come up with - in order - a concept, a world to set it in, and a character. The concept is the hardest part, the world is already supplied for you in a Pokemon fic (except you'll probably want to build it a bit more to make it actually sensible), and then there's the character. I personally keep an entire bank of characters for various D&D games, and I try to get in their heads - make it so I'm not just writing them acting in certain ways, I'm giving them a set of circumstances and then writing their reactions. This can be hard, but like I've said, start coming up with a bank. When you've got those three things, just put your character in your world and set your concept into motion, and have your character react to that concept as it progresses. It really helps if your character is of the personality to actually take notice of the concept, because otherwise you have to start coming up with contrived coincidences and nobody likes those.

>>25685429
You start at the earliest of the moments that are both interesting enough to start with and relevant to how the story ends.

>>25685493
I've never written anything about the main games or the anime, because I haven't played past gen 3 (though I really want to get Y, but Su/Mo is gonna happen soon) and I've only watched a few episodes of the show. I also feel strangely uncomfortable writing for a human that controls creatures with abilities.

There was one idea I had in mind about a PMD fic where a pokemon would be studying the human-now-pokemon's habits, manners, intellect... Buuut no clue of where I'd place it, timeline wise, and I have plenty of stuff missing to complete this idea.

I like the bank idea, thanks.

Are there any decent pokemon/digimon crossover fics?

<blog>
Next Fic Chapter 9 draft is done.
6k words happened somehow.
Total's up to 60k.
Muse is putting up the points this week. And doing a hell of a job re-writing everything I'd planned for the run up to the climax by throwing out 90% of it and replacing it with good stuff instead.
</blog>

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So, do any of you write-friends drink coffee while writing? I've had two cups to help me stay in the zone during a plot intensive scene and my next chapter is already at 7,000 words. Feeling accomplished about that.

>>25686599
I drink some cherry-flavored smoothie when I write from time to time. I don't know why, but it helps stimulate my mind a bit.

>>25686599
I work in an office. I think coffee might make up 15% of my bloodstream now.

>>25686730
That sounds tasty. I usually drink my coffee without any sugar but a smoothy sounds really delicious.

>>25686777
Nice trips of truth. I can relate to your office experience, the firm I work at also has a designated coffee hub that's always crowded.

>>25686805
God bless working at a Web development firm. Now I can feed my caffeine addition at not cost to myself.

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>Coffee

>>25686599
I just use cranberry juice. The excess of sugar (I can't afford the naturally sweetened stuff) and a harsh enough taste to be a kick in the ass make it a good semi-natural energy drink, and there's no caffeine to fuck with my sleep cycle.
>implying my sleep schedule could be any more fucked than it already is

>>25688440
God dammit, hit the button too early. Anyway, quick question: Which is worse, switching from first-person to third-person limited for one perspective of two when there's only been one chapter (and the first chapter, no less, where I was limited) where it HASN'T been like that, or using first-person perspective for two characters that are entirely different but are likely going to stay near each other?

>>25688483
Stick with first person for both.

>>25688483
it is imperative that you stick to one person perspective at a time. You can jump around all you like as a first person form head to head per chapter, but be ill advised to jumping to third person and vice versa.

>>25688542
Well, here's the thing. I have two characters I'm jumping between - Rin, who's just officially gotten his name (I'm making progress! A little! Whee!), and Aislin. I was going to occasional in-chapter jumps between them - separated by a horizontal line, of course, I'm not a complete idiot - but I wanted to know if I should put Aislin in third-person and Rin in first just to differentiate them for the readers. I do prefer using first-person, just because it's a little easier to get in their heads, but I do want to differentiate it for the readers. Also, poor little Ais has had only about 900 words from her perspective and a fair portion of that was Chatot interrogating her, so it wouldn't be too much of a jolt to switch (and I wrote that in first person because otherwise I'd have to write her introducing herself and that would just be the most redundant string of words ever written.)

>>25688248
I figured if I'm not going to smoke, drink or do actual drugs, I'm going to indulge myself in caffeine whenever I want.

Overall, I'm happy. Though caffeine withdrawal is real and annoying.

>>25688667
You've got line breaks so you could do first person for both, though I prefer third person for most everything, especially when there are multiple characters/protagonists.

As long as you dedicate the sentence following a break to who's doing what, then you should be fine. Some people might be confused anyway though.

>>25688716
I mean, third person is good. I'd actually prefer third person for Ais, just because she's a lot more expressive and emotes a lot more (it's easier when you've had your body since you were born) and I can describe that more easily in third. Rin needs first person, because he still views himself as a human in a Riolu suit and I don't think that's ever going to change. Unless it does. Which could be very interesting...but that's a plot to explore later.

...Ahem. The point is, both of them could be written in either perspective, but I think it'll work better if Rin can be written in first, and Ais in third. The only question is, I wrote Ais in first before I'd revealed her name, and I'm wondering if changing that up in chapter 2 will cause chaos.

>>25685601
>PMD fic where a pokemon would be studying the human-now-pokemon's habits, manners, intellect...
I'd read it.

>>25688248
Okay, you got me - coffee helps me pump out chapters. Better convict the rest of the world too for enjoying such evil beverages. Here's your (You)

>Writer's block in the rear-view mirror.
>Riding a limo to Climax Town.
>Still not sure how the denouement is going to turn out.
>Body is ready.
Feels good man.

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>>25690460
>Finally at the final chapter of fluff I spent 50k words getting to
>Suffering is over, cheesy cliches and affection are all that's left
>I accidentally wrote in them teasing one another before I get floor it

>>25690649
>floor it
*0 to 60*

Affection is an affliction. I expected my next story to be kinda sitcom with some action and a little drama and then it went and found depth and made a mess of everything.

Hell, even cheese gets mentioned a couple of times.

As for the floor, I think a part of it is a lost cause.

Write-friends and lore-friends, just how popular is the "profession" of Pokemon training, do you think? I'm working on a new piece about a guy who's never been a huge fan of Pokemon, but through big things and little things, ends up training a handful of mon. And of course he hates every minute of it, but eventually sees the merits blah blah blah.

I've always like the idea of somebody being begrudgingly good at something. But how much sense does it make for something to be aversive to Pokemon, since the world is built around them? Would it break the lore if he doesn't know much about them - the way some people are unfamiliar with dogs - orthat he doesn't like them at all, the way some people don't like dogs? Looking for opinions mostly.

>>25691104

It makes plenty of sense, and the anime has had characters who didn't like pokemon for various reasons. Maybe they grew up in a household where making money was always top priority, and nobody had time for pokemon raising. Maybe he was allergic to the wild rattatas that were native to his area, and just thought he should avoid ALL pokemon just to be sure his throat didnt swell up and kill him. Shit man, maybe his older sister was an ass who put a joltik in his shoe as a prank when he was five, and he never wound up getting over it.

>>25691161
I'm still fooling around with this concept, but I like the idea of the protag being just blue-collar enough that he wouldn't be as starry-eyed as Ash initially. Maybe his father was a merchant marine or a truck driver, so he grew up with values of "all work, no play," as you suggested. The Pokemon were just kinda there all his life. That said, how in a bubble can a person be in that universe? There would be some Pokemon he would know from commonplace (the way everyone knows what a golden retriever is), but it wouldn't make sense for him to have an encyclopedic knowledge of a subject he mostly dislikes. Would it?

>>25691234

You could also make him like an army brat, wherein his family was always moving, and he wasn't permitted to keep pokemon since he never knew if they next place they were sent to live would have allowed it. He would have seen pokemon around, but never allowed himself to get /too/ into it 'cause he knew he would never be allowed to have one.

As for not having an encyclopedic knowledge about them, yeah, I'd say you're probably right. Shit, even taking on the whole dogs analogy, I'd say that most people who have golden retrievers STILL don't know shit about golden receivers. If they did, they wouldn't keep asking me to shave them "cause they keep shedding". No shit chucklefuck. It's a golden retriever. It's going to shed no matter what, and if you shave it, it's going to shed even MORE.

I'd say its safe to assume that he probably knows the general names of common pokemon, maybe one or two of the evolved forms if they're common enough, but still out of the loop that he'd make tons of rookie mistakes.

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>>25691295
These are all good ideas, thanks for getting things flowing. One of these days I'll get a chapter posted in the bin with this trip and hopefully it hits well. I just don't want the character to come off too stilted, like he's literally from another universe. His general motivation is that he needs not just to be doing something (laying idle makes him uneasy) but he needs to be useful/helpful/good at something to boot. I think that could mix real well with a story about a kid learning about something he never gave a chance. It's also ripe for humor.

>>25691387
No problem! Hope you find a way to get it all out on paper, so to speak. Good luck to you

Great wheel in the sky was a nice read.
I feel like shit. and I want to cry.
I already read the one about the audino too.
That was a good one.

>>25691104
This depends entirely on what sort of world you build. Are pokemon integral to daily life; seen almost everywhere and anywhere, important in professions such as construction, or part of the world's most popular sport? If so, then it would be unrealistic to have the protagonist be ignorant of them in any extreme way. I've never watched a full game of football in my life, but I can still tell you almost all of the rules, just by the merit of it being popular. So if pokemon were important in day-to-day life, it would be ridiculous for some guy to not be familiar with pokemon typings, common moves, and local/popular/common species at least. Heck, I'd expect pokemon to be taught fairly in depth in schools in this case.

That said, someone being disinterested in pokemon would not be unreasonable. Maybe everybody and their brother has at least one pokemon, but the maintenance involved is more than the protagonist feels like dealing with. Is taking a pokemon out for a battle like taking a dog for a walk - a necessary chore, if you're disinterested? Special diets, fireproofing a home, being force to battle because you have a pokemon, etc, it all sounds like a huge PITA if you're not really into it.


Of course, if you paint the world a little differently, it can be more reasonable. If pokemon can't integrate well with human society or are simply balled often, not being terribly familiar with them wouldn't be nearly as unlikely.

>>25689167
Thanks!

Then again I still don't know which pokemon would do the studying. The partner wouldn't quite feel right doing that, no matter the game. I was thinking of just putting my favorite pokemon goodra as a mon curious/obsessed with the human myths of old.

But then again plot point about human not having any memories, which sucks kinda (I don't remember if the human regains them completely in the ending).

Any recommend Lyra fics? 'cause if there's none I may well have to write one myself.

Oh God already got a short idea about Lyra and Khoury playing that faggoty Voltorb Flip to rescue that Dratini you can get in the games.

>>25693896
Depends on what you're looking for I guess. There's the yee ol'classic Yandere Lyra Milkshakes and a bully fic starring her and Quiliva. Anything specific you're looking for?

>>25694083
Gonna sound like a faggot but I'm not into reading overly sexual stuff, at least for Pokemon. I'd rather get immersed in the universe. That said most genres work for that, from slice of life, shipping, to dark.

>>25694114
eh it's fine. I understand that stuff isn't for everyone.
In that case though, you better start writing for Lyra and help clean her old psycho ways as portrayed in the past, as I got nothing.

>>25694336
Why is she portrayed as a psycho anyway?

>>25694348
The original fuel came from that she replaced the female MC in Crystal in the HG/SS remake. It all went downhill from there.

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>>25694650
It's like they never saw the anime episodes she was in.

Or they just ignore them, I just wandered into this thread on a whim because I was hungry for Lyra fics. Not sure what the consensus on the anime is.

Do people get triggered when Pokemon make appearances in stories outside of their home region, assuming it isn't too drastic? Like a Zigzagoon in the Jhoto region, for example. I think it makes sense that different species would migrate around the world, but obviously their region of origin (Hoenn) would have a more dense population of Zigzagoons.

>>25696409
I don't think it is a problem, though it could raise a few eyebrows. An easy justification is simple migration, or a stray that tried to go to the bathroom, got lost, and found itself staring at Lysandre and his death machine.

>>25696409
>walking through the woods near my house the other day
>hear a growl
>look up
>it's a fucking Siberian Tiger
Don't do that.

>>25693896
>>25694695
>tfw getting a stronger urge to write Lyra and Khoury adventures around Johto
>tfw it'd be fun but possibly worthless because nobody would be interested in those two

Writing can be fun and all but feedback is good too.

>>25696480
>walking through woods near my house
>hear growl
>look up
>it's a fucking dragon

I could try.

>>25696409
I certainly don't. While having a denser population of a native species is needed, I don't think having different species in a region matters much. Put in as many various species as you think a certain ecosystem would require.

>>25696480
If enough people owned and traveled with siberian tigers, it'd be more likely than you think. Uncommon, but plausible… enough to make it a plot point.

Outbreaks are canon and also summoning foreign pokemon by playing their national anthems.

Rule 1: Be interesting.

>>25696750
>summoning foreign pokemon by playing their national anthems
Can Pokemon be Patriotic?

>>25696569
I'm sure someone here can give some feedback if you ask for it...well mostly anyway. Depends how long you want to carry the story

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>>25696769
>make Kanto great again!

>>25697028
As long as there's interest, I could keep it going for a while.

I've written before, so it's not like I'm a complete scrub at it either. It's just measuring that initial interest. I'd need to know how things work around here too.

>>25697040
>that image

Why am I surprised?

>>25697136
Not him, but my 2 cents; I've always typed up several chapters of a story in advance before posting anything, just so you have that initial safety net of content. If you start strong but hit a wall after Ch1, you'll lose people, and if you have a good story all laid out but it's a slow burn, people will get tired of waiting for updates. Having a bunch of stuff you can put out regularly helps keep people engaged while you work on the next phase.

>>25698158
Pretty solid advice there, thanks.

Problem is it's hard to gauge interest here. Maybe it's the timing since I live in the UK but thread seems very quiet today.

Maybe it'll be better when I get up at three fucking AM like an idiot.

>>25698158
>Not finishing the whole story before posting.
:P
Yes, LL. And that's why my feelings haven't changed.

>>25698182
This thread gets active for about ten minutes twice a day when a few people happen to be on at once and then it sinks to page 9 before bobbing up again.

Interest ITT is gauged in terms of if you are fulfilling /r/porn or not, >0 versus =0.

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>>25698182
It's about 3PM here in the land of burgers, and the thread still feels pretty touch & go. But I'd say the best way to generate interest is to just put out the work!

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What is your favorite climate to set your stories in? I like the occasional rainy overcast setting but lately I've enjoyed late Spring, right on the eve of Fall.

>>25633706
Oh, this was pretty good, thanks for the link anon

May sound like an obvious question but if you're writing from a human perspective, do you have to repeatedly write the Pokemon saying their own names? Sounds like that might get silly and old after the first couple of times. There's ways around it, of course, I just wanted to know a consensus.

>>25699793
I find it to be pretty annoying, but it depends a bit on the theme of the story. I think using words like Chittering or Growling for a pokemon's voice to be better

>>25698280
>making readers wait 2+ years for the next complete story that they'll blow through in three days

Waiting sucks for impatient people, but email notifications are a thing for a reason. It's not like people have to check back on your profile every few months to see if you've updated.

>>25699793
Your options:
1. Anime style. Embrace the pika-pika-pi when it's necessary but try to gloss over it with careful narration.
2. Game style. Pokemon make sounds that seem appropriate for the species as an animal. It may imply meaning but doesn't get elaborate.
3. Mime style. Let your pokemon to make vocalizations but they have no more meaning than a normal animal's noises. More complicated meaning may be conveyed with gesture and body language which you would need to describe in narration.
4. Conditional permission. Speech training is canon, translation devices are in the ballpark, and you can extend pokemon ability, like the canon telepathy, if you need to to grant special snowflake speech to a particular pokemon or to make it a plot mechanic (as I did). This works best if you have only one pokemon that talks a lot or if it applies broadly to let many pokemon communicate in some way.
5. Hand wave. Decide that your pokemon talk and that's how it is.

The correct option is determined by your writing style, what your pokemon do in your story, and what and how much they have to say.

>>25699919
>Three days?
>Implying I won't release it one chapter at a time over the next couple months to maximize visibility.
Until it's all up. Then...
>Three days?
>Implying they won't read the whole thing in one session, neglecting all non-vital bodily functions until binge is complete.
Also.
>Implying anybody watches for updates to my shit.
My sides.

>>25699793
You have to pick your moments, regardless. I read a shipfic where Delphox was saying "Phox! Phox! Phox!" over and over while it was being fucked and I nearly laughed out of my chair.

Obviously the context will vary, but stuff like that can come across as a little tongue-in-cheek with improper timing.

Unable to bring myself to post this update yet because I'm too self critical and going back to edit for the third time. I'm stuck in a writer's purgatory.

>>25700045
>watches for updates
For those fags who don't create accounts to get automatic emails every time you upload, I'm sure they do manually check your profile every so often. I would.

>>25701626
Do it faggot
And then link it
You double faggot

>>25701626
We can't help you if you don't let us, bitch NIGGER

>>25701781
I manually check my profile every day. It never changes. I need a hobby.

>>25701626
>Only three editing reads.
Living dangerously.

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>>25701781
>tfw unlisted pastebin hero
I have a smut with a whole 600 views and I've only posted it twice

New here. Is there a general preference between Pastebin or FF?

>>25702307
FF is generally better because it lets readers find/keep and review your stories.

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>>25702116
>check my profile everyday
If that were true, you would have fixed this a long time ago.

>>25701626
Have you given a thought to letting someone else proofread your stuff? Fresh eyes makes a difference sometimes.

>>25702211
Link it familam

>>25702307
if you're scared of accounts, pastebin is your friend

>>25702451
Well clearly, the in-progress ones get all caddywhompus

>>25702561
Why would I link something that isn't pokemon, silly?

I've only written a short semi-lood that for the pmd and phox threads once. Doesn't matter enough to post.

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>>25702451

>CAN'T ESCAPE

>#8 escaped

>>25702451
>Blaming me for bad rendering.
Fine. I removed the list tags. Now I have to keep the numbers in order manually. Because I really wanted there to be more math, the heating of a competition swimming pool to make a hot tub for a lugia just wasn't enough.

>>25688826
Okay, we had a nice little discussion about first or third person, but I never got my question answered. Assuming I could do both, should I write Aislin in the preferred 3rd or the consistent 1st?

>>25702926
Go for preferred 3rd I think. It'll save you from making a slew of decisions later on, like if they ever run into each other.

>>25702926
I still say consistency is key, or if you must do third person, change everything to third person

>>25702926
Never change narration from whatever you commit to. Does "preferred", mean you'll be switching? Definitely don't do that.

>>25703122
This.

>>25702926
Yes you did. I said earlier to stick with 1st oerson for both characters. Rather, choose one narrative POV (1st or 3rd) and do that for both. If you find that you prefer 3rd, do that for both characters. Just stay consistent.

>>25703122
>>25703133
>>25703903
Well, here's the problem.

I would much prefer to write in 3rd person, and I think it just works better for any story with more than one narrator. I mean, it would work best for the characters if I did first for one of them and third, but evidently that's taboo. But it is physically impossible to effectively write in 3rd person when you're intentionally trying to reveal nothing about the character and you don't know their name yet. Making matters worse, I'm not sure how effectively I could write Rin as third person, but I really do want to write Ais in third. How absolutely terrible would it be to maintain consistency between perspectives - having one character that's ALWAYS referred to in first person, and one character that's ALWAYS referred to in third? Separated by line breaks, of course, I'm not stupid. If it helps, I wouldn't be doing that much perspective-switching - once a chapter at most, probably dividing it in half. Maybe no divisions if I can make the chapters start getting longer.

>>25704927
Alternating between first and third person within a chapter or story is a terrible idea.

>But it is physically impossible to effectively write in 3rd person when you're intentionally trying to reveal nothing about the character and you don't know their name yet.

That's not impossible at all. It's not even difficult. How do you get around describing somebody? Don't describe them. How do you get around using a person's name? Call them something other than their name.

A simple third-person limited point of view is probably ideal for your purposes.

>>25704927
Unfortunately, it it is poor writing to change person perspective in the middle of the story. Based on what you are aiming for, third person would would work best, meaning you would probably have to rewrite it to make it consistent

>>25705232
Oh yeah, limited. Tell me, how do you describe them when the only thing you have to go on is "he" without making it clunky and overly confusing?

>>25705286
you also have his, and if gender is unknown or not important, neutral references (stranger, wanderer, blue dog thing, etc etc)

>>25705286
Individual, creature, being, person, explorer (as in, he's exploring this new environment)
Give him a temporary pseudo nickname for the narrator to use: the amnesiac etc.

Alright, beginning to draft up a bit of a plot, at least for the beginning of Lyra + Khoury adventures around Johto. Feel nervous about it though, for some reason, despite having written tons of times before. Maybe because it feels so autistic to write for these characters when literally nobody else does. Can't be any worse than the other fandom I write for though, in all fairness.

So far...

-First city the pair arrive in fresh off the blimp is Goldenrod, where Khoury's Dad lives (poor cuck doesn't even have a name)
-Lyra's eager to challenge Whitney immediately but Khoury isn't ready to start their journey yet and advises Lyra to wait a few days, to which she reluctantly agrees
-The next day the pair visit the Game Corner and are shocked to learn Pokemon are held as prizes. They resolve to win them but have to go through the most dreaded test of all... that fucking Voltorb Flip game. Khoury does most of the work, winning himself the Abra and Lyra the Dratini.
-Day two, Lyra's Marill wanders off into the subway, which Khoury's Dad warned them to stay away from. The pair try to track down the loose Pokemon and come across a strange assortment of characters, eventually resulting in a battle of Lyra vs. a Pokemaniac.
-(Possibly the next day something about the radio tower but if not...)
-Day three, gym time. Lyra's Girafarig and Chikorita versus Whitney's Clefairy and Milktank. Girafarig easily stomps Clefairy but is rolled over (literally) by Miltank. After a tough fight, Chikorita evolves into Bayleef and Lyra wins her badge.
-The next day, the pair finally leave the city and come across the Pokeathlon Dome. Khoury sees it as a good way to bond with Pokemon and wants to compete... only, there's a regulation that only those with enough medals may participate in the Dome. These medals can be earned in events across Johto, thus giving Khoury, y'know, something to actually do alongside Lyra.

>>25706396
That's it so far, don't want to get too ahead of myself.

Including May as a third group member is a strong possibility though, since she's also in Johto the same time Lyra and Khoury are. (Gotta bring in that wider audience somehow, oy vey.)

And if anyone's curious, no shipping. At least, explicit shipping. Lyra's shipping tendencies will be explored though.

(Why do I feel like I'll regret this so bad...)

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>>25705286
It's easy! Think of how video games do it. Bioware and Bethesda, for instance. Each Fallout protagonist has their own title awarded to them for their exploits; Shepard is just called Shepard despite having a defined first name set by the player, Dragon Age does a similar thing with the Warden, Hawke and the Inquisitor. In Elder Scrolls, passersby will call you things like 'stranger,' '[player's race],' 'friend.' Basically, just think of what your character could be called based on attributes that are visible at first glance; their appearance, their species, their role in their current situation or even just a particularly obvious bit of their personality. It's not that hard, even if your pronouns get a little repetitive. That just means you need to work out a way to avoid overusing pronouns (which, really, you should be doing anyway).

>>25706915
I dunno if avoiding pronouns is really the way to go in writing. The application of titles isn't too bad - you get called Courier throughout all of New Vegas and it never sounds bad or forced, but that would mean your character's identity is presented as their title before anything else, and in NV that is exactly the case.

Then again if the whole point of the work is for something like names to be vague and out of reach or maybe just unimportant then you don't have much in the way of choice when it comes to using titles to avoid the work being a vague, amorphous mess.

>>25706396
Who's Khoury?

>>25707883
Lyra's friend during the episodes of the anime she appeared in. They took off together and set out to travel Johto as a pair.

Good question though, reminds me I should properly introduce him, since he is a bit of a unknown character.

For now I'll just say he's a bit nerdy (but not extremely) and his goal is to become a Pokemon breeder.

>>25704927
>it's imoossible
No it's not. You're trying to take the easy route. Buckle down and write without revealing things. Just because 3rd person is supposed to be omniscient, it doesn't mean that you have to give the audience all that information.

>>25708639
No, the whole point is to write in third person limited, because that's one of my favorite ways to read and it's a good way to stretch myself writing. But when you're trying to write a character in third person when they
>Don't know what they look like
>Don't know their name and have no titles to go by
>Don't have any memories

>>25706915
Oh yeah, there's passerby...but when you can't reveal their species and you need to refer to them without anyone else around, what the hell do you do?

>>25708726
>but when you can't reveal their species and you need to refer to them without anyone else around, what the hell do you do?
see >>25705422 for a few examples. In third person, narrator has the advantage of hinting what this lone individual is without telling the audience who he is exactly. Narrator can just give him a subtle title until the reveal of his name (wanderer, lone wolf, biped, amnesiac, figure, just to name a few).

A minor setback is that there might be a much bigger focus with the MC interacting with other people, which may not be everyone's cup of tea, but it will generally answer most of your concerns. Worst case scenario have him stumble upon a puddle or something to see his reflection, where then you have a lot more access to titles narrator can give him.

>>25708817
Well, what I have so far is: he wakes up, accidentally wakes up Aislin, beats the shit out of a wild Glameow on pure instinct, and then she tells him he's a Riolu in a haze of shock and blood loss, believing him to be a different hero. I'm trying to reveal as little as possible about him until then, so I can at least pretend it's a mystery. I is good for concealing such things.

>>25709053
There's just not that much difference between writing it in 1st or 3rd limited. Most of it can be fixed by putting "he" in place of "I". The narrator is tapped into his head anyways, so it's functionally the same.

>>25709053
The way I see to play this and achieve your goals is to begin in first person on "He" awakening and run it like a stream of consciousness (real time, narrate only experience/thought) until the moment that Aislin identifies He as a riolu. Break into third person on that very sentence and try to stay in normal third person narration ever after.

This will work because the first person perspective is literally He as he experiences himself. When Aislin identifies He as "Riolu," which is an identity that He does not recognize (certainly not as himself), He is supplanted by this Riolu identity that he now must act through—likewise, He the Narrator is simultaneously disembodied and becomes a third person describing from He's perspective the actions of Riolu, under his control but not truly himself as He understands the situation. Now your perspective shift communicates the protagonist's mental state in a subtle but meaningful way.

Once in third, you can limit Narrator's knowledge to what Riolu knows about, or you could go omniscient; I suggest to stay near Riolu and his specific knowledge whenever possible, but if you need to shift omniscient in a complex scene to make it an easy read, don't be afraid to.

You would be able to go into first-person stream again only under special circumstances, such as if He has a dream wherein he does not recall the Riolu identity and is a "himself" as he can be, and was in the opening scene. You would be first-person until the instant he awakens, which would again eject Narrator into third-person.

And don't bother trying to set up reveals that are revealed in the first chapter, like this "hide Riolu's identity" crap when it has no payoff and causes this thread to fill with idle hand-wringing about ways to avoid names or how many times you can use pronouns with vague or no antecedents before the readers revolt. Write for a strong and interesting experience to pay for the inevitable establishment material; reveals come later.

>>25709053
You can switch between the first and third person but I would recommend that, if you gain nothing else from this post, you keep your chapters consistent. Avoid bouncing back and forth if you can. For instance, if you want to write the first chapter in third person to set up the scene that's a good idea but then in the next chapter (and presumably those thereafter) it would behoove you to remain consistent with your choice for the reader's sake. The good thing about introductions and first chapters is they allow you, the author, to experiment with perspective as you build the world. Afterwards you really should commit to one, but I wouldn't neglect a good story for switching at appropriate times, with the caveat that such a thing wad never in the middle of a chapter.

>>25708726
>don't know what they look like

Unless your story takes place in a desert it seems unrealistic for the MC to go more than a few hours without seeing something reflective enough to show his form. There's water, mirrors, metal, etc. Mostly water, since it's supposed to be a dubiously-developed Pokemon society.

>>25710182
Actually, it's in a pitch-black forest. As in, "midnight in the middle of a national park far away from any lighting besides the stars, because the moon is currently new and will stay that way forever" dark. So yes, there's a little light, but think about the last time you walked through a forest preserve - were there just puddles of water lying around? Besides, it adds a nice bit of characterization for her to just casually reveal it to him; he gets to panic and then force himself to choke it down because he doesn't have TIME to panic.

Hello, everybody. Laptop back in commission, so expect Minty Ch. 3.

New chapter has been uploaded for Gift of the Protector's third arc. The author is still working on it apparently.

What's the rule on posting a quick preview of your prose ITT?

>>25712192
pastebin it. You don't need an account to use it.

Alright, Chapter 5 is almost done so I might actually manage to finish it for Easter. Just have to make sure I didn't subconsciously leave some "would say" bullshit in the last parts.

Also what's the general consensus on Shedinja? Is it born from the shell of an evolving Nincada or just magically appears inside a Pokéball? How would its spirit stealing stuff work when its trainer looks inside his crack? Just curious since details on it are a bit ambiguous.

>>25710257
Does the whole story take place in this forest? I spoke with the assumption that he'd find out when he stumbled upon a lake, or found a town. If that doesn't come for a few chapters, then I understand that there's a little room for mystery.

>>25712794
It's based on a cicada shell so I'm pretty sure that's the accepted description. I think the Pokeball stuff is just a game mechanic. As for the soul-sucking, it's dubious. Pokedex entries can be quite exaggerated. I think you can just make it whatever you want while following cge's rule of Be Interesting.

Here's a random story I found:
https://www.fanfiction.net/s/8735679/1/Snowblind

It seems like Ice Road Truckers with some eeveelutions involved. I don't know if I'd recommend it, but it's certainly something different.

File: 1458539979065.png (446KB, 1000x854px) Image search: [Google]

446KB, 1000x854px

Ears 6 eventually
Though I might get a job between then

>>25690649
I hate this. It's like premature ejaculation. Shamefur dispray.

>>25718259
But I don't hate it at all

Just in case anyone here reads my work, I've put up a new chapter of The Dark Type.

http://anime.adult-fanfiction.org/story.php?no=600049126&chapter=21

here is an excerpt from something I'm working on. the scene is a nurse explaining to the heroine why the local gym leader is so half assed and lazy

http://pastebin.com/NvmGCjNv

please critique. I'm not happy with some of the wording, particularly at the end, but I can't quite figure out a better way to convey what I want

>>25718997
It gets the job done at its basic, though I'm not feeling much emotional impact. It might have to do with line 8 with allieving pain. This is more notable in line 17, which could use more of that 'fear' impact.
Considering the trainer is absolutely dangerous, I could think that Robert could still hear the screams of his Grovyle fresh in his mind, contributing to his ultimate decision. If he never experienced true fear prior.
Don't just make him sweaty, make his heart beat, his breathing quick and irrational, heart clenching. Be the fear.

>>25721078
>>25721078
Move it fags