/ss13g/ - spessmen on a spess station

First for waifus of olden!

first

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>>183534551
>that last time list
you get one guess who made this general.

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>trying to do my job as the detective
>antonio asks me to grab sillicate because the AI keeps releasing people from brig cells, apparently
>sure
>come back with the sillicate
>antonio is now in cuffs in the courthouse, HoP is the judge
>try asking everyone what the fuck is going on
>all i hear is UNCUFF ME and DONT UNCUFF HIM and BORG TAZE THE HOP
>been asking for solid 5 minutes, no response
>the courthouse gets bombed, antonio escapes, so does HoP
>for the next 10 minutes keep asking what the FUCK is going on in :s
>no response
>finally ask HoP face to face
>he takes me to the bar and tells me a very long story about how antonio apparently stole some assistant's gloves and the assistant sued him
>over fucking gloves
>turn around and get the fuck outta there before i get crazy
>next thing i see is Antonio going vigilante, some retarded IAA "solving a hostage situation" by giving someone a hostage, and then asking for actual demands
>one flashbang/steady tazer aim could end this in a second because he wasn't even lethally armed
>now everyone starts that antonio is rogue
>this one greyshitter still crying about his gloves
>have the urge to throw myself out of the nearest airlock
>HoS dies in his office, few seconds later i go there and he DISAPPEARED. Literally.
>then someone in medbay dies, rush there, no trace of him.
>Then someone in Brig dies, rush there, get shocked to crit by doors to have a sweet release.
this shit gave me an irl headache, i fucking hate all of you

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rate my escape hallway

you make me wanna

>>183535002
It's shit. Escape Hallways aren't supposed to be comfortable or I won't leave.

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>>183534869
>some retarded IAA "solving a hostage situation" by giving someone a hostage, and then asking for actual demands
I love this game

>>183534869
>not wanting a fun non antag hostage situation.

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no i wont uncuff u

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this is your bar for the shift, say something nice about her!

>>183535402
You need more flower variety

Roses when?

>>183535402
maximum comfy / 10

>>183535551
roses really smell like poo

>>183535402

I actually hate this bar because it's turned the bar into more of a diner while making it look more like a library. Seriously whatever retard decided to put the carpet under the main bar area and booths where people will eat is just fucking begging for mold and insect problems.

>>183535718
So do you, hence you need more flower variety to disguise the smell

>>183534869
>throw myself out of the nearest airlock
Do it, faggot. The station is better under assistant control.

>>183535887
rude :(

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I made a bar once. It didn't go well.

>>183535994
it has some good A E S T H E T I C so good job
10/10 would visit for tips as a loose cannon detective

>>183535852
Future carpets will be made from antimicrobial materials.

>>183536105

Apparently future tech still isn't good enough to keep out radical steve.

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>>183535994
Neither did mine
Halfway through, a plasma fire devoured the station

>>183534738
How old are we talking
Like, pre-2016? Pre-'15? Pre-shiggy? Pre-Essjay?

decomposition when?

the station's not exactly proving to be a sterile environment (Mice appearing out of vents, cockroach infested maint), hence the need for a janitor.

What if there was a rotting mechanic? Things like flies and maggots making a corpse fester? Wouldn't work with no atmosphere, but I'd imagine flies would still be around the station

Hell, add a secret feature where if you're teleported the same time as a fly, you'll steadily corrupt a-la 'The Fly'

>>183534738
>dawn heat will never step on you

>>183535402
It's comfy but too much wood. Fuck wood, I've had enough of wood, at the very least goddamn, we need some new/varied kinds of wooden floors/furniture.
Past that I rate it 10/10 because I'm in that picture.

>>183536440
Pre-SJ waifus were like

Dawn Heat
Isabella Caivano
Rin (other Rin than new age Rin)

>>183534869
It's not crying, it's a legitimate concern. You don't get to be security with all the protections that come with it then abuse your shit to rob someone.

>>183536796
>new age rin
I'll admit to being a relative newfag, the oldest Rin I know of is Shitzoku. That one, or is there an even older Rin?

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>>183535402
this is your medbay for the shift, say something nice about her!

>>183536440

I miss Catherine Phillips

>>183536887
Rin Tezuka who is unironically best girl

>>183536952
>Tricord in the mix
>Headache for weeks

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>>183534738
>>183536440
Rate my waifu!

>>183535994
Can someone post the bar Boss set up last night? The dark blue one with shades and stuff? Was fucking incredible

>>183537092
>people say old waifus were good

I'd take a Fuura or most other current day waifus over that slut any day

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>>183537092
>it's all flowing back in
>the painful memories
>it is not a good pain

>>183537202
>>183537282
That was all in one day

>>183537083
>Haven't taken anything all shift
>Start getting messages
>Nothing in the logs about an admin fucking with me
STOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOPPPP

>>183535852
Bagel bar is the only decent bar because IT'S A FUCKING DRINKING HOLE FOR DIRT MINERS AND ACID-SOAKED SCIENTISTS WHY WOULD YOU PUT FUCKING WOODEN FLOORS GODFUCKINGDAMNIT

>>183536579
We get enough features as it is with roaches, can you imagine if every corpse spawned flies and shit?

>>183537373
Bagel bar is great, even if I do hate the diner pattern with a passion. Easiest to revamp though, no tedious prying up of floorboards and replacing them and then painting and all that shit. Just paint and done, for the most part.

>>183537386
There's no sanity on cockroaches. They don't actually consume the food, they just keep tapping at it, increasing its toxin content, spawning eggs, and it makes an endless cycle of heck.

With flies, you'd probably at best have an overlay of sorts rather than a mob, maybe an infection datum for rotting limbs infested with fly maggots.

Is using an accent IC annoying?

I've seen French, German a d Italian recently.

>>183537202
>judging an entire generation of waifus based on one action of one waifu
Fuura isn't even a waifu, she's just a person who loves positivity and news reporting, don't clump her in with that demographic.

>>183538357
>fuura isn't even a waifu
She's above wallflower class and she's not a wallweed, she has to be a waifu.

>>183538264
Yes.
accent is a dumb way to make your character a special snowflake, it's way better to have people remember you over your overall behavior/the way you put sentences together, if you catch my drift, instead of
>oh it's that le french chick xddd

>>183537498
Automatic tile painter/tile remover you can ride on when

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>>183537092
How many fucking calories does this woman burn each day?

I didn't say night because she's obviously a whore.

>>183538437
Accents are only fun if you go the whole nine yards.
Get cockney as shit and speak entirely in RAF banter nobody on the station understands.

>>183538695
wogwan meistro ya bloodclart battyboi

>>183538423
What's wallflower and wallweed classes? A waifu is actually somewhat derogatory term that describes someone who plays to gain as much of an affectionate following as possible. At least that's how it's used.

>>183537520
I don't know what you mean by sanity but they stop laying eggs when there's 30 eggs

They're easily killed by cold, flamethrowers, and acid sprays

>>183538920
Waifu is top class, good players think my static
Wallflowers are decent but unnoticed players think Eva
Wallweed are the shitters, people remembered for shittery, think Emilia and Rin.

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>>183538357
Whoever you are thank you

>>183538437
What do you have against le french chick? Bad roleplayer or something

>>183539059
Okay, I get it now. You're describing waifu as a tier and I'm describing it as a play style.

>>183539215
As a player who thinks like you and played for the same reasons you did but got clumped into the waifu bullshit and made the mistake of feeding into it, I can see that you don't deserve the waifu bullshit train. Please don't let it discourage you.

>>183539423
annoying accent

Please, I have a Sick son, please, he is very Sick

>>183539451
>made the mistake of feeding into it
Which one of the self-hating "reformed" waifushitters are you?

>>183539506
he's my son now

>>183539532
Kolith

>>183539571
Please, he has a disease, he need bananas to live, please, he is very Sick

>>183539532
Entyshak
You're completely on point with that self-hating and reformed bit.

>>183539670
Still an attentionwhore. Please KYS you were never that great of a player so stop thinking you were

>>183539451
That's hella sweet of you
It definitely hasn't, especially because I have a second character now for when I don't want to play Fuura too

>>183539670
>I hate myself therefore everyone else that is even remotely like how I was should hate themselves or change
Fuck off, let people play and have fun. Don't dictate how others should play, keep to yourself. You've been back all of a week and you're in the thread throwing your name around like it means something, like people should listen because you're le oldfag.

Let new players have fun, you're old and burnt out and you admit you hate yourself. You're not a good influence or example for a new player filled with wonder and joy. Not to mention the shit you did in the past.
Leave new players alone.

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>>183539670
reminder

>>183539769
Here's your (You) back, I really don't want it.

>>183539831
Good.

>>183539975
You've missed the point of the post entirely. Congratulations. The intended audience got the message, that's all that matters to me.
>throwing your name around like it means something, like people should listen because you're le oldfag.
This line proves it.

>>183539670
You're an okay person to be around. Better than 95% of the other former-current waifufags, most of them are obnoxiously bitter or outright assholes.

>>183539831
Honestly ignore everything you read in these threads, have fun and don't break the rules and don't give a frickin care in heck what others think.

listen to me in this post though, but only this post

>>183540251
100% Orange This.

>guy named 3hotdogs playing for months
>expect it to be someone's new ckey or a stealthmin's alias
>was the schizophrenic underage amerilard himself all along
This is fucking rich. Hiding at plain sight.

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>>183540097
>all those names i know
>2013

>>183540790
us oldfags am i right?

why was angelyite popular

>>183540956
Bullying a kid and being a shitty waifu who drew porn of themselves

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I still haven't roleplayed as captain william diego during a blob/malf round. This character would be a good gimmick. It's who I'd play if I started up again.

>>183540956
They bothered to roleplay instead of being a TDM NPC set to Grand Powergaming

Is it possible to debrain a borg and place their brain into a human body?

>>183541264
Yes.

>>183541243
So do many other waifus

>>183540956
>Brown skin
>Helped as an assistant
>Used emotes
>Lewd drawings of the character
>Learned and promoted atmospherics in a time where no one knew atmospherics and plasma fires were the norm
>starred in two admin events and performed well enough to everyone's entertainment
>Roleplayed a character with flaws
>Made people feel good about there characters
>Was a proper mime
>Wasn't a shitter
>Never powergamed
>Participated in OOC banter
>wrote excellent green text stories

This is just off the top my head. Feel free to enjoy the shit flinging that follows.

>>183540956
Acted cutesy, put on 'feminine' mannerisms, was exotic because black.
Basically the poster child for why-foo.
Oh and also leading on a mentally unstable underageb& into thinking he was A: An IRL girl and B: had an IC relationship with his character.
And also drew porn of himself. Mediocre porn at that.

>>183541387
>starred in two admin events and performed well enough to everyone's entertainment
Where is my chance to do that

>>183541264
Yes. Blow them or unlock, remove the cell, screw, wirecut all the wires, crowbar. Swipe an id with robo access on the mmi then setup the monkey human. Pop its brain out then use the mmi to eject the borg brain. Put it in, fixovein, and dex+ defib it up.

If it's a posibrain, you need to order an experimental tech disc and rare minerals for a MaMMI to put the posibrain in then brainswap as usual

Why would you shoot a man before throwing him out of an airlock?

>>183535994
>4 out of 5 stars
>This scenic back alley bar has excellent atmosphere and the prices are great
>Had to take a star off for getting drugged, dragged into the back, and murdered for a cult

>>183541387
>wrote excellent greentext stories
>tfw remembering being in one of angelite's greentexts because i did some retarded shit as a newbie cultist
i will cherish that memory forever

>>183541510
Get a reputation as being a decent player.

And above all, be dependable.

>>183540956
see
>>183540097

>>183540956
She was like one of the main characters on a television shown. She complemented rounds nicely by being around

>>183541510
2013-14 was a better time for admin events, believe me. They went beyond mashing buttons or god modding a mob.

>>183541650
>was in one of his greentext stories for pulling him out of a fire and reviving them
>felt warm and fuzzy for days

>>183541914
>>183541665
>>183541387
>angelite fags believe this
Morena was better imo

>>183542038
I unironically thought morena was okay

>>183540956
Exceedingly nice person and roleplayed at a disturbingly higher level than the server was meant for.
They're the only trialmin who failed their trial period for being too forgiving and only giving warnings and notes to people instead of banning them.

Post art of how your static looks like!

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>>183542550
every round

>>183542710
wtf why did you post me

>>183542281
Actually, they failed their trial period because Ashley (SJ's girlfriend) didn't like Angelite.

>>183542710
wtf where'd you get that picture of me.

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So i haven't played since late march, can someone give me a quick rundown on all the drama that's happened?

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>>183542550

>>183542903
my boii rfultra dindu nuffin wrong

he was going to college n shieet

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>>183542550
Green eyes instead of red, though.

>>183542748
Ashley was the biggest fag thats ever played the game desu

>>183543017
Lord almighty how many times am I going to see the same exact picture of some fucking static

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>>183542550
like this but in his 50s

>>183543017
>bigass bimbo

jeans ugly

>>183543017
puking_anime_girl.png

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>>183542550

>>183543035
Ashley and SJ are cancer to this community and should never be let back in.

>>183543223
People have been reposting the one I did awhile back. Not really my fault, mate.

>>183543343
It's funny because SJ treated OOC like his chat room and most of the server only kissed his ass every evening.
Only after he left did people actually start mentioning how much of a piece of shit he was.

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>>183542550

>>183543465
Well, he got kicked out because people realized how much after a scumbag was after senaat unmasked him

>>183543465
OOC and now the D*scord are usually just full of the biggest ass kissers.

>>183543465
It's because he would "ban" you for doing something he didn't like. The dumb 1 second bans, but it's still pretty annoying.

>>183543224
tranny? why are his/her/xie's nipples so big?

>>183543601
Hey, I personally invite you to make fun of me as much as your gay little heart could *possibly* desire. It's no fun if everyone just agrees with each other and pats each other's backs

>>183543697
>tranny
???

>>183543723
Fucking this.

>>183543601
I see a lot of disagreeing and fighting in the dickchord. People are just a little more civil about it there.

Keep in mind that homeless Harry isnt just an NT retiree but a honklocaust survivor. Cutting off his legs to escape the infamous Ouchslipz honk camp without slipping. Right under the Red noses of the Banana Brigade.

>>183544040
If that's the actual backstory that's kinda funny. Is he triggered being near clowns?

>>183543930
>???
You fucking retarded?

>>183544174
the guy in the pic looks 100% masculine
get your eyes checked bud

>>183544174
I don't even want to know you if you think that man counts as a tranny.

>>183542903
dragonbro's hella dead. Funeral next saturday

>>183544159
Yeah it is. Harry gets uneasy around clowns and is know to throw bottles at them.

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>>183543224
something like this?

>>183529983
but I don't know their current ckey

>>183546059
no homo but I would marry this man

>>183534869
Im the greyshirt that sued antonio.

I think i did the right decisin, you don't get to be a sec officer and abuse your authority by stealing other people's shit, neither should you be allowed to disregard a court order or attack a hop just because you don't agree with said court order.

Bottom line is, i would do it all over again, and im glad you got a massive headache since you disregarded the injustice i suffered simply because it was over a small thing such as gloves.

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>>183542550

>>183536884
Thanks mate, im glad someone see it the same way i did.

>>183546228
I disregarded it because the station was in actual danger of:
>Antonio going vigilante
>AI being possibly rogue
>decreasing security force because people started dying all out of sudden

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dab on haters

*dab*

>>183546356
>disregarding one injustice simply because there are other problems going about.
See, that is the problem, you can't disregard injustices no matter what.

You could ignore it and continue trying to deal with the bigger problems, but you just HAD to disregard the injustice i suffered over comms...

You deserve the headache, im glad i gave it to you, specially for turning a blind eye to sec corruption and criminal activity.

>>183546678
epic

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>>183546239
weren't you banned?

>>183546059
Yeah but still dark hair.

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>>183542550
fits because i usually try thinking before acting which leads to me getting robusted

>>183543017
HoS uniform of this when?

>>183547280
After detective gets more suits and warden gets a commissar outfit from wh40k

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>>183546881
he will return
OLE!

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>In the middle of DUDE BOMBS
>Need to kill the HoP for greentext
>surround the pad with copy balloons, teleport him in with sensors, sticky pricky, and remove kebab
>It wasn't actually the HoP, just some random dude in his clothes
I just got fucking memed on man

>le ebin custom lawset turns out different than expected maymay

>>183547104
we need holoparasites ported simply so traitor Adachi can get a persona

>>183546881
fuck off banana

>>183547756
>use sensors
>not noticing it's the wrong guy
???

>>183547280
Please, that's post-round beach wear if anything.

>>183547772
Who did it, did they eat a ban?

>>183547793
that'd be pretty acoustic

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>>183547838
Bro it wasn't even me this time why do you have to be this way?

>>183547938
It didn't turn into Blasma, AI just didn't let them into Upload again and punished some guys who were harming others/the station

>>183540097
I don't know how Zak was ever admin considering he doesn't know the basics of this game.

I'm so fucking sorry, Captainship was even a literal fucking mistake because I was just trying to refocus the window when the prompt suddenly appeared where my mouse was.

As for the lawset, well I wanted to discuss laws with the RD, but they were doing some retard thing so yeah. I didn't think the silicons would lawyer it that fucking hard, but there were also some fuck-ups I made in it. Sorry to those who got killed because of it.

>>183548242
no one gives a shit, stop blogposting

>>183548205
i haven't played for a very long time, cut me some slack, nerd.
Last time i played there was only box station, too.

>>183548242
The sillys killed noone as far as I know

>>183543224
Ricardo?

>>183548679
They killed Antonio for his flamethrower interrogation technique.

>>183548761
>flamethrower interrogation technique.
genuinely curious what that is

>>183548818
Antonio is a madman and has torched me twice now.
Spray with welder fuel then light the fuel one fire.
Ironically the flame barely hurts and never goes out so you get a sick permanent flame from it.

>>183548563
Doesn't mean you have to act like a bumbling retard.

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>>183548972
the thing is, i'm not acting

>>183548723
No.

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>Latejoin detective
>Oh okay HoS is a borg apparently
>Chicken in front of my office
>It wants in
>Makes some sound
>Open door and get a borg to translate
>It asks for help against the CMO who apparently transformed him
>CMO happens to turn himself in
>explodes in the examination room for no apparent reason
>Change back the Vox Paramedic and bring the CMO to to get borged
>Crowd in front of the upload for ten minutes
>Go check it out
>Captain is suffering mental breakdown
>Suddenly in the corner of my eye I see a fuel tank approaching rapidly, followed by a laser beam
>It stops right at my feet
>walk towards the light
>get cloned by the same Vox from earlier and regain my stuff
>as I head out, multiple explosions
>manage to make it to EVA with the help of another officer
>but there's no sec suits and we can't open the other doors
>suddenly, the unresponsive pAI I had all shift comes to live
>Opens the doors
>We make our way to the shuttle through the debris
>on the way home, laser gun fire
>several people down
>manage to taze the attacker after a wild gunfight, and he gets killed
>Sit down and enjoy the victory with my pAI buddy

What a round to play sec

>two people in medbay in antags

and yet it felt like almost all of em were antags

do syndiecuffs still blow up if you remove them by cutting a hand off?

>>183550243
No. on_remove is called exclusively from u_equip. (line 329)

Guys, I hadn't heard of Pomf until now... Is it true?

>>183550995
Yes, all of it is true.

>>183551108
Wow.
RIP.

>>183551108
>>183550995
What is?

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>trying to listen to my own music
>bar juke is playing
>one person is spamming notes on the piano
>another on a trumpet
>while the admins play ear rape music over the sound system.

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>>183551627
Very nice

>>183551627
>not confiscating instruments at all times and turning station music off in settings

Yo, does that cool Vox trader back from February or so still play?
Can't remember his name because of stupid vox names. Always enjoyed his shenanigans.

>>18355188
Tahki is dead
Wunderbar is banned
Chikiweki hasn't been on for a few weeks, and plays chef now
there were 3 or 4 other good traders but I can never remember their names
I think they all moved on

trader is a shitty job, no one can play it forever

>>183551883
>>183553085

>>183553085
Chikibreeki is playing a different character now

>>183553085
Wunderbar deserved it for being a tradertiding nigger

>>183550995
What is true

>>183553556
he didn't get banned for trader tiding
>stopped playing trader and started playing incredibly douchey shitcurity
>after several months was on thin ice for repeated grief as secuirty
>copped a questionable perma for '''ban evading''' by activating a syndicate relay while antag banned and killing 2 people
>thread took credit because there was a massive shitposting campaign against him at the time
he still shows up in the thread from time to time, although it's hard to spot his posts

HOW I WISH I WAS AT HIPPIE NOWWWW

>Yeah man the cult's fucked...
NAR SIE HAS RISEN

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>GUYS COME HERE SO I CAN MAKE YOU DEATHSQUAD
>Step 1: Spawn a bunch of humans
>Step 2: Place players in them
>Step 3: Give them we---WHERE ARE YOU ALL GOING?
>Harvesters get greeted at centcom by naked guys.

Next time I'll switch step 2 and 3

>Jorge Gibson says, "Give me a drink mate"
>Hand him a glass of orange juice
>Jorge Gibson says, "Need alcohol"
>Fuura Kafuka exclaims, "I don't serve alcohol, sorry!"
>Jorge Gibson asks, "You what?"
>Fuura Kafuka exclaims, "I only believe in non-alcoholic drinks!"
>Jorge Gibson says, "Get me a beer"
>Go in the back, empty out a bottle of beer and fill it with tomato juice
>Put it in front of him
>Jorge Gibson exclaims, "Dont make me get angry at you, get me a fucking beer!"
>Go in back and visibly drag the locked beer closet into maintenance
>Come back
>Fuura Kafuka exclaims, "Out of beer, sorry!"
>Fuura Kafuka says, "The closest dissapeared"
>Fuura Kafuka says, "Somehow"
>Jorge Gibson says, "You are gonna suffer"

In all of my years of this game this is one of my favorite interactions with someone else

>last human alive drifting aimlessly through space singing Barrett's Privateers while the station is ripped a new asshole by Nar'Sie

>>183555319
>Not just having it be a death squad where you put people in to die

>Skelletons doing CPR on other skelletons
>Warden hiding behind a potted plant until nar-sie rises, and ends up being the only human to survive
>cult ends up winning

what a game

>spend entire round drinking around a fire and discussing the important things in life with Blast
>both of us abandon station when Narnar shows up
>die to a swarm of cult mobs that spawned around a vault
Very cozy round, 9/10

>>183555319
Dude, it was a successful death squad. What's the problem?

>DO NOT STATE TOWARD THIS LAW AT ANY POINT.
What did they mean by this?

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>>183555462
I survived too by bailing out of space. So not the last human.

>>183555604
Last one on the station.

>>183546159
It was posted several times in that thread you autist

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>have all antagonists on
>get cultist 99% of the time, nuke ops on the 1%
>remove team antagonists
>never get any

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>tfw

>>183558580
You know things are plenty fucked when you have the orders to defend AND survive.

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>>183553085
>Wunderbar
>good trader

>>183558580
>lz2
>on the river map
im so sorry

>get ling
>build lair with to house a cloner with other lings incase if someone got decaped they would be revived
>wizard
>lair done after 20 minutes
>cant get anyone alone due to massive valid lust
>every time i stalk someone in maint a secborg or officer is around the corner
>start seeing xenos
>just eat the bodies in morgue
>only 2 of them edible
>gank a random engineer
>borg sees me doing this
>doesnt care in the slightest
>try to gank avada
>the shotgun i grabbed off the ground only had 1 shell
>the shitty buckshot
>taze lazed
>decapped
i want my antag round back diety

>>183559752
>the shotgun i grabbed off the ground only had 1 shell
>the shitty buckshot


all according to keikaku

>>183559752
I'm starting to think that antags in mixed should at least know that they're competing with other antags, so ones like vamp and cult who need lots of prep time will try getting stuff done more quickly. Don't think vamp even did anything. At least the last cultist alive made a mech, then died to bleb on the shuttle.

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STOP PRESSING BUTTONS YOU RATDICK

>>183559894
i thought it was going to be an ultra long ling round so i spent a good 20-25 minutes building a lair autism fort. I spent all my time prepping so that by the time i could gank anyone they were armed to the teeth

>ling
>wizard
>xenos
>spiders
>blob
>apparently vampire as well
>"hey guys I guess I'll call the ops"
please stop pressing buttons

>>183560009
Avada?

>>183559894

technically it COULD be a low intensity mixed where you only have two or three types of antag

could is the word here

>>183560009
no isaac. avada was the one who killed me

>>183559752
Gotta examine as well as eject a shell to check the loadout my dude. It's 80 damage if you nut a buckshot

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>>183559894
>no one bothered to research words
>dont want to to abandon my job at science because its so easy to turn into a hive of cult villainy and if i disappear when im constantly budy its basically screaming that im antag
>was about to send our greytdier "mining" since no one cares what greytiders do
>Wizard kills literally all of the cultists
>nearly kills me
>stuff all my cult shit in the trash disposal and get dragged to medbay
>leave and go to pick up my book
>in the 2 seconds it takes to eject the book my coworker sees me by bringing a borg
>stash it in a different disposal because im anticipating a check by security
>Forgot to fucking disengage
>STORM EARTH FIRE
>message from nar-nar in medbay
>you are the last one alive
>no book

God, what a catastrophe.

so is there a full size map for donutstation yet?

>>183560265
Just uproot the research botany lab, teleport to the derelict and cult diona all day

how robust is avada

>>183557017
It's because everyone opts out of team antag, making it a small pool when it does get selected as the gamemode

>>183560040
>>"hey guys I guess I'll call the ops"
They were requested nonstop all round long in deadchat. At least I didn't send them on the station.

>>183560428
that's what bagel is

>>183557017
Cult/rev/ops is insufferable. Hell is other people.

>>183560437
Average can shoot you fine

>>183560265
>Wizard kills literally all of the cultists

Neet and the clown got killed in a very awkward fight by me and the mime after Neet welderbombed me with the shotgun I left on the ground

>>183560482
Deadchat is retarded, it's full of dead people.
If they weren't retarded they wouldn't be in deadchat

>>183560535
can't argue with that.

>>183560265
Hilariously enough, I saw neet use a stun talisman on the wizard right in front of HoS and another sec officer, and they just literally didn't care as they ran after the wizard who jaunted away.

>>183560535

>he think deadchat is full of people that died in the round
>he doesn't enjoy watching the round as a roundstart ghost

>>183560841
>enjoy watching the round as a roundstart ghost
I don't enjoy it, it's my job

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>>183542550
same name even,im just playing as osaka in space

>>183560265
You didn't forget to disengage. I greytided through science and noticed your pump was off. Ejected it and found your book and talisman. Grabbed it and rode disposals back toward cargo but got ejected in maint after a welderbomb blew the pipes and killed an officer. Grabbed his ID and dragged him to sec and reported robotics as cult to the HoP but there was so much mayhem happening no one could be bothered with impotent cultists.

>>183560841
Observers aren't really that better

>>183560841
They're retarded too

>>183542550
Jill. But only when I play Bartender. Otherwise I'm an Adam Jensen expy pre-augs. I don't really bartend anymore after I was involved in a Greentext. Shit gets too much attention. I don't wanna be demonized into the next Morena.

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>>183561814
Forgot my fucking image. See, this is why I don't static. I'm an idiot.

>>183561961
My static was roughly based off of her in looks also

Somebody give me a rundown on 2hotdogs.

>>183562765
american autistic kid

>>183562765
He's someone you absolutely need to unban

Be honest. How many of you only play this game fr the cute girls?

>>183563138
what the fuck

>>183562765
someone who would be unbanned now if they didn't spend the last 18 months shitting up the thread and trying to evade

>>183540740

Honestly the admins typically don't care if you ban evade as long as A) You wait a while before doing it and B) You don't immediately begin acting like a turbo shitter again.

>>183563138
If you play this game for fat sweaty men pretending to be girls on a space station you seriously need to fucking end it

>>183563138

>he plays because he wants to interact with girls

you should try Citadel, anon

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>>183563138
>Cute girls
>On /vg/ station
>neckbeards pretending to be girls and writing erotic fan-fiction
>Cute girls

What the fuck

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vCadcBR95oU

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lmao sawbones spawned explosives on everyone at round end

>>183564743
players usually do that themselves

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As HoS, dealing with the station devolving into pro-wizard vs anti-wizard chaos was amazing. God bless you all, especially the wizards. Polite as hell.

Multi CKeying is only bannable when you're using them at the same time, right? There's no rules against making a second CKey just so you don't get bullied in OOC? Or for a joke?

>>183564836
I may or may not have explicity ordered the pAI to run over wizards, kill wizards, and put a stop to any and all wiz biz. Smooth talking or no, you really shouldn't have brigged me with glubs, sunnies, and a full toolbelt

>>183564854
>he can't control multiple characters at once

>>183564905
I'm fully aware; I left you brigged like that because I had to hurry as Betulla was assaulting my other officer and the wizards at that moment.

>>183564836
i just wanna see the insides of a wizard man...

you think they taste funny?

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>>183564934
>not multi-boxing as the entire nuke ops squad and having a flawless victory

>>183564978
Some passerby even started insulting the warden because of it, so I got a good laugh.

>>183562765
Ban evaded instead of just appealing a minor short ban
Has shitposted and ban evaded autistically ever since

>>183559894
>vampire chemist
>okay, i'll just fill the fridge quickly and then slip off to--
>wizard with lightning bolt
>making k-derm at the speed of sound
>botanist is making rare chems but also death bees for some reason
>suddenly, xenos
>more clonex, more k-derm
>eke out some time for a personal medkit
>hyperzine requests start coming in around the time medbay is flooded with N2O
>party in the medbay and the bodies don't stop
>can't eat them if they don't survive
>doctors all leave, EVA is raided, and I don't even have a crowbar yet
>give up, go to shuttle, get blobbed on

>>183565043
>not multi-boxing as half the station on cult and fooling the admins into thinking it's a regular stealth cult but you've actually been intentionally letting yourself be converted by yourself

>>183564854
Multikeying is no questions asked permabanning. It's one account per person so you can't get around your notes and ban history

>>183559894
I was gonna survive on the shuttle, and even would have let the cultist chill with me, but he scattershot my face in

>>183565187
Nah, they're still good eating. Unlock blood is still valuable for that dank thermals and insta-hypno

>>183565260
What if I make a new key because I think the other one is silly?

>>183559894
Vamp only needs a toolbox and multitool. It's easy to sabotage/destroy comms, wear a generic outfit, then glare cuff meme people.
Cult only need to share their words and meetup location, vend stun talismans, convert 3 dudes each, drag a monkey around if literally nothing is happening then narnar. Slow cult is overrated.

>>183565349
Don't let the door hit you on the way out.

>>183565349
the other ckey you used to use will be tacked onto your new one and your notes will be carried over.

>>183565535
>>183565550
Thanks. Dick_Balls_ will soon be no more

>>183565601
Enjoy your multikey perma ban appeal

>rfultra is banned
thank fuck for that

>>183560437
Fucking garbage i missed like two shots last round that would have been absolutely critical were it in a not stupid situation.

>>183566182

For a few days, the only good side is that the next time they go ful retard, they'll fetch a nice permaban

>>183566223
I actually cant hit a single taser shot when I play sec

>>183566343
Then don't play sec

>>183566414
how do I get better without playing it?

>>183566473
Play assistant and challenge people to laser tag

>>183566473
Play captain and challenge people to taser duels.

>>183566473
Play clown and challenge cops to catch you after you disarm their gun

>>183566473
Play head of personnel.

>>183566343

The trick to taser is to anticipate where your target will go to evade your shot.

The trick to laser is to click on your target and it does the job for you. Bonus point if you click on the head. You can see the effect of laser click in the target practice holodeck

>>183566414
At least they're trying

>>183566343
Lead your target. Play lasertag when you can get someone to play against
Later on once you fix your aim, work on asymmetric fighting. AoE stuns like flashbangs/flashpowder. Water/lube slips. Using corners/moveable cover. Cornershooting with ricochet rifles/lawgiver/flamethrower, catching persuers with prox explosives/polysmoke/lubesmoke drops, ZASing with explosion grenades, one-tank bombs, one-tank firebombs, and the RCD, straight up blasting through cover/corners with a blast cannon, siccing your ED-209 on them

>>183566596
Play captain, order 30 weapon crates then holocaust the crew or die trying :^)

>>183566657
Please fucking don't. We have enough shit on our plate

>>183566343
We had a perma'd sec officer who slipped the HOS and i detained him and the captain walks in and the perma'd sec officer starts screeching and the captain tases the hos because he's a drunk fucking idiot and i accidentally tased the warden, missed a shot, and then finally hit the captain. It could have been really bad.

>>183566825
This is all good advice, but one of the things I really had to learn is how to win a fistfight. Having unexpected gear is one thing, but getting caught with no gear took me by surprise a few times.

The trick to winning a fistfight/your fists v their weapon is dont. disarm spam and yakkety sax until you get a stun, weapon, or backup

Know when to run away

>>183567072
>tfw a toolbox is more dangerous than a double esword

>>183566815
Rin somehow got himself unbanned from TG so he stopped tormenting CM.

>>183567447
How did he even get banned from TG in the first place? It's space TTT and that's what he likes to play.

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>it's another "DUDE BOMBS LMAO" episode

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>>183567182
>a cup of water is the one of the most deadly weapons in the game

>>183560437
Incredibly unrobust.

>tfw you'll never have Jean hatefuck you

>>183567601
He was that much of a shitter even there.

>>183568573
Why would Jean hatefuck you? She's a gentle soul except if you piss her off holy shit do not piss her off

>Check crew manifest
>Horatio - Scientist
>Immediately have urge to melt all TTTs
>Decide not to, don't want to be metagay, and hey maybe today will be the day he decides not to-
>BOOMBOOMSHAKETHEROOM
>He was a vampire
Ban fucking when

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>jean having a dick wasnt just a meme

>>183568573
>>183568774
yo these waifu memes hella epic

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>>183568774
it's grim we're talking here
of course it's not a meme.

>>183568745
Off the top of my head I can think of a dozen ways to make bombing the station interesting.

Why the fuck does EVERY person who makes bombs set them all to the same signaler, then just throws them all in disposals and blows them without even a fucking word. What is the point? What fun is that? What interaction are they getting out of the whole thing, honestly?
There is nothing wrong with bombing, but TRY TO MAKE IT INTERESTING you lazy fucks.

>>183568843
You say this as though there isn't CLEARLY a market for Michael Bay movies

Some people literally just want to watch an explosion and don't care about anything else

anybody wanna erp

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>>183568843
>watch some atmos tech build some kind of fort in escape
>make a dud TTV and throw it in
>mfw watching him rush to it and space it in a panic

the best use for TTVs

>>183568774
>>183568819
Of course it wasn't. I said as much before.

>>183568697
>tfw you'll never antagonize Jean just to get her all riled up

>>183568975
Do you actually ERP on other servers?

Why include that detail you degenerate

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>Join in early-round as a shitty grey
>Go to the bar because that's what assistants do
>It's under Sharia law and the bartender isn't handing our alcohol
>Manage to convince Xer that Greys need alcohol to live
>Hands me a bottle of vodka
>I walk out of the bar and hand it to some scraggly looking hobo
>About ten minutes later the Station blows the fuck up
>Manage to survive and drag myself without a EVA suit towards to holodeck
>Stay there for the last few minutes until the shuttle arrives
>Somehow make it to the Escape shuttle with exposed space everywhere without a fucking suit

Where were you when it was proven that Greys were superior to Humans?

>>183569073
>erasing the star david

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>>183568981
>you'll never take a picture of her bulge against her tight HoS jumpsuit leggings and post it on the newscaster.

>>183569060
I used to. Don't anymore. And I included it because it's part of her background.

>>183569073
YOU TRICKED ME
T R I C K E D

>>183569112
Source?

>>183568975
Dude, come on, don't do this please. This is a road you can't come back from.

>>183569123
I want you to leave again, and never come back.

>>183569210
It literally does not matter. The only reason people know about it is because I said it at first to discourage people from waifu'ing Jean. Unfortunately, that brought out the futafags, so what can you do?

>>183569331
Just keep your dark secrets to yourself my man. And the FutaFuckers will find someone else to glomp onto.

>>183569486
I hardly consider it a dark secret.

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>>183537124
i am replying pretty late but did you mean this one?

in and effort to become more popular than Jean "The Queen" Blancy, my static has surgically attached a 3ft long dick.

Their name is Rin Fukimoto, you can find me on TG or vore at night.

>>183569797
>>183569693
>>183569486
>>183569331
>>183569210
How do we get rid of this shitposting? I know it's late night, go make a discord or something.

>>183569865
Filter or just ignore the shitposts.

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>>183569774
>Those private rooms

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we're in a golden age of /vg/ guys, good players, good admins, good headmin, good roleplay.

>non ERP being considered ERP with no-warning perma
>pomf banning people over non-server rules instead of just admitting it was a rule 0
>saronsen not deadminned
Nah.

>>183568745
>havent bombed once since i got clucked
>be drunk and its muh birthday so i decide to dude lmao once and go to sleep
>check the thread and im getting memed
whats ur ckey kiddo
Also it was hachi

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>>183571387
>it was hachi
I hope you have a hang over when you wake up fagboy.

>>183571387
>hachi

Rundown on this one? People seem to like her, but played a round on the same department and acted rather unfriendly and dismissive.

>>183571486
you know you're the only bird i love hachi


no homo

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>walk into fitness
>see this
what do?

>>183571613
hachi is a major self shiller, sad!

>>183572034
Ask the Xeno if it could help me out with some stretches.

>>183572034
get my valid on

>>183568774
Did something happen?

>>183572034
Strip and throw my backpack as I send signal, gibbing her instantly with my backpack bomb
ayo gurrl, y doncha cum bk 2 muh tsci pad. We can lay down on beds by 40 monkeys and have a bad ALIEN LIFEFORMS DETECTED ALIEN LIFEFORMS DETECTED ALIEN LIFEFORMS DETECTED ALIEN LIFEFORMS DETECTED ALIEN LIFEFORMS DETECTED ALIEN LIFEFORMS DETECTED ALIEN LIFEFORMS DETECTED ALIEN LIFEFORMS DETECTED

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>>183572034
Tell borgs to eliminate the alien threat, then custom emote a bit of joy along my disdain for silicons as I watch them get ripped to pieces by the xeno.

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>>183572034
thank god for staffs of change.