/ss13g/ spessmen on a Spess Station

kill

I have strong opinions about skeletons

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>Moments away from building a HONK mech on the derelict
>SMELELELEL

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wtf i like xeno's now

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unban 2hotdogs you sick pieces of shit do you have any idea what you've done to that poor boy? all he wanted to do was to play video games and now he wont eat and wont go outside anymore he just stays in the shadows of his room typing away then deleting his messages in fear of getting bwoinked. it's been 2years. If you don't unban him from your gay little server i'm going to sue the server operators I am his mother and I love him very much.

I have strong opinions about humans

>>165302019
do you have strong opinions about belts?

Riccardo your ass was an excellent scientist.
Props man, keep it up!

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>xevonix still plays
>he still defends his IC girlfriend IC and OOC
>he still wont accept that it's a fat man IRL
>he still thinks there are players out to get him
>he still searches for his name in the logs just in case
>he still hasn't improved his art style

why does he still bother logging in anymore?

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>>165273492
Okay the list is complete, vote for best waifu!
https://www.strawpoll.me/12087476

>>165302575

the sad part is how the discord is filled with plenty of people like him that just think a online relationship is what they need in their pathetic life, and scream at anyone who think otherwise

>>165302575
why my little boy 2hotdogs wants to play video games with you sicko degenerates is beyond me. I wish he would just find a nice white girl and have nice and quiet white babies, but hey who the fuck cares what I think I'm just an old salty bitch fuck you for treating my boy this poorly I should spank the living day lights out of you naughty boys for the way you talk online. naughty naughty boys need time out.

>>165301504
>that shitty old fireplace sprite
Fireplaces look much better now

>>165303345
talking about yourself in the third person and pretending to be your own mother is some norman bates shit, go see a doctor

>>165303436
I am his mother and I will smack the shit out of you for talking to me like I'm one of your gay little friends you shove dildos into so shut up when you're talking to me

what's the downsides to playing a vox again? other than the stuff on the wiki, does it make anything more difficult (or am i just considered second-class for playing a bird boyfriend)

>>165303568
>underage fags like 2hotdogs find this funny

>>165303609
Besides the obvious ones, Vox are Pox

>>165303609
not understanding the downside of being a fucking faggot is quite the disability

>>165303609
there aren't really any tangible downsides other than making cloning and cryo a little more complicated for other people, the real downside is the (well deserved) discrimination

>>165303609
Second class, walk slowly because suit. You can walk fast by taking off your suit but you lose your backpack slot. Borgs might get told to kill you and you will have no way to protect yourself.

Reminder that male Alien, Vox and Skelyoj players are mostly bigger snowflakes that "female" players.

>>165303736
>>165303693
>>165303674
>>165303675
sounds fun.
birds are our friends pls

>>165303126
I genuinely don't see a problem with online relationships. As long as you're enjoying each others company and like, face-timing, calling, skyping, whatever, sometimes; there's nothing wrong with it. It's when these people just talk via text services with no intention of actually bringing the relationship outside of being digital it's kinda, just weird.
This is why I don't understand ERP and f-list and whatever. It takes some serious self confidence issues to pursue sexual activity as anyone but yourself.

>>165304053
there's no difference between the things you describe you faggot you're arguing your semetics versus your opposition's semantics
people are the same people no matter what fucking stage they express upon

honestly does 2hotdogs have a mental issue or does he enjoy shitposting

>>165304378
are you asian?

>>165304378
his iq is in the quadruple digits

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>>165304053
>He still hasn't realized that the idea of "self" is a spook.

You are only constrained by what you allow the world to define you as.

>>165302575
Literally who?

>>165304253
maybe you could use less buzzwords and be less angry and try to construct a constructive argument?
Are you bitter or just lonely dude?
If you genuinely think people are the same when they don't have their name or face attached to something then you are mistaken and very naive. It's much easier to be someone you aren't when typing than it is when talking and videoing with someone.

>>165304726
A player who called the thread a bunch of beta cucks so people shitpost about him nonstop.

>>165304771
projecting

>>165304897
ok now I know you're just being an idiot.

>>165304053
>It takes some serious self confidence issues to pursue sexual activity as anyone but yourself.
Nah. Some people just like to pretend.

>>165304807
Half the thread is beta cucks though.

>>165304996
stop projecting you maroon

>>165304253
Guy must hate arguing about the jews...

>>165305102
this is how I know you're retarded. You latch onto one trigger word I cleverly placed in there just to catch the morons like you. You got played again and I guess now I have to teach you fools the english language.

The word I used means you're arguing for your own personal bias and crony mentality and tribal interests. dumbass

>>165302575
why do you still come here to post this?

>>165304053
Online relationships especially between people like the people who go on this server are always shitty and fragile. I've fucked with two long distance relationships purely because they were long distance. All I had to do was maintain a better personality than the other person's current partner and also give two shits about them without coming off as a desperate beta. I'm an ugly motherfucker and nice looking girls have cheated on their partners of over a year that they HAD MET IN PERSON over me. The worst part about it is that their boyfriends are still good friends with me since they had literally no idea that it was going on.

Just keep that in mind before you get invested in a long distance relationship.

>>165305025
true.

>>165305004
I think the want to pretend comes from pent up issues. It might not be obvious, but there's nothing ordinary about wanting to be a 10ft Minotaur with a horse dick.
>>165305269
Honestly just sounds like you're a huge asshole with some issues yourself

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T70-HTlKRXo

2hotdogs on the left with his quadruple digit IQ

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>>165304053
>tfw have been in a two and a half year long internet relationship met on /pol/
>visited eachother a year ago and succd and cuddled alot
>this month im moving in with him
>he introduced me to the server a month ago after pushing for months

>>165305789
how big is celts dick?

>>165305789
how big is celts dick?

>>165305789
how big is celts dick?

>>165305862
Does celt have a boyfriend?

>>165305862
>>165305895
>>165305998
>>165306003
Celt doesn't go on /pol/, he's a raging liberal

>>165306035
how big is celts dick?

>>165306035
how big is celts dick?

>>165305269
See that's the funny thing about online relationships, they're basically just friendships with sexting attached. 99% of online relationships end with things just fizzling out because one person has gotten what they wanted out of it, usually someone to sext them without the time investment or stress that comes with actually interacting with another person in real life.

>tfw you know how big celts dick is
probably not even the only person here

>>165306379
how big is celts dick?

>>165306310
That only happens in the first month or so. After that you actually begin to explore eachother personality and begin to test eachother limits and develop upon eachother. But it depends on the people, me and my boyfriend do get in fights but we always resolve it and learn from it.

>>165305657
It was a dick move to do it to my friend, but the first girl and I had just become really really close friends. She initiated it by saying the first "I love you"l." We ended up meeting in person a few times, but I ended it because I just felt that it wasn't the right thing to do, and I wanted to stop before it got TOO serious.

The second time, it was between me and a friend of 7 years. She always talked to me about the issues that her current boyfriend had and some of her own problems all the time, so she ended up falling for me. We're back to being just friends after being together for a while, I broke up with her because of some dependency issues she had, which didn't really go poorly. The camming and shit still casually happens, but that's just because we're such good friends and know that each other appreciate it. It's like the one Seinfeld episode where Jerry and Elaine stay friends but keep having sex.

So really, I don't see any huge issues with it, it's not like I actively tried to fuck anyone over.

when did this thread turn into /r9k/

at least it's better than waifufaggotry

CAN WE STOP THIS SHIT AND GO BACK TO TALKING ABOUT AVA...the vidya?

Really specific request: A while ago here there was a guy who made a SM engine which used conveyorbelts and two/three crystals
Anyone got the picture/gif/whatever of it so i can show someone?

>>165306928
Nick Weller's madman engine

>>165306763
It's because Av*da and the other waifu posters have no idea how to contribute to conversations about relationships because they're autists who only know how to mimic their h-doujins during ERP sessions.

>>165306928
Crystals or shards?

>>165306928
You're aware that it didn't work, right?
It exploded immediately.

>>165304053

hi, dattinderbox! still metagaming?

>>165307048
I think it was shards
>>165307031
Probably
>>165307087
Regardless

>>165307120
Oh, okay. I would be fucking horrified to try ANYTHING with more than one crystal.

>>165306310
I had a LDR with a girl a few years ago now. Both of us found the whole sexting thing too awkward; didn't help she was a mormon and didn't even know how to masturbate but that's something else; we would just call each other, talk and play games. It was nice and we were always there for each other. But with the distance being too much and us both being poor college students; we decided to call it off and just be friends because we'd probably never get to meet for years. Two days later she was back dating her previous LDR who was a massive cunt and tried to control her like she was a pet or something so I just stopped talking to her
I keep a drawing of us a mutual friend on my desk, I think I posted it in the thread once on a bad day.
why did I even bother writing this.
>>165307101
>datinderbox
I'm genuinely insulted, because he literally pretends to be his character and brags that his character has a large dick.

>>165307282

someone already leaked his mushroom dick and selfie on discord chat, he's been known to meta-game a lot and bitch at people on steam/discord to resurrect his ass if he's dead

>>165305240
No, you made a typo

>>165307282
It's all good man, I getcha. Love is a strange thing. You just need to talk about it, but you never know why.

Let's stop derailing the thread, I feel like we're being as bad as the rampant waifushitters.

>>165307453
if the metagame thing was true then surely he'd be banned by now? all it would take is one legit screenshot
>>165307535
it's not like anyone here talks about something better

>legitimate relationship talk starts
>waifuposting stops
wew

By the way, could someone explain to me how the pipes in the atmos room works? Pipe autism look really fun, but I want to be a productive atmos tech before I go on to do fun projects.

>tfw when your boyfriend tells you what dicks the admins on discord like
>they all have great taste

>>165308157
>Pipe Autism
>Fun

Atmos has literally one job. And thats to flood the Station with Plasma, or to stop the AI from flooding the station with plasma by powergaming.

Pipe Autism is a fucking meme.
>Me make gas cold
>Me make gas hot

>>165306928
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pIiBB1dA-3o

>>165308310
Well, what kind of autism do you like?

And atmos has more of a responsibility than that. They set up power if engineers are missing/incompetent, fix breaches and piping issues, and make distro work better.

Not to mention they make the best bombs. It's not hard to snag a TTV.

All women should be killed. In game and outside of it.

>>165308157
There isn't much you need to do to optimize atmospherics. Set up a way to keep distro at 101.3kPA. The best way is a digital valve with a script. Then, just over pressurize the pipe behind it by setting the N2, O2 and Air Mix outputs to max.
From there, you just need to freeze the atmospherics end of the waste loop, not the entire thing. Make sure waste is dumping into it as fast as possible, add some more vents at the end. Don't destroy the Large vent, make a 3 way and branch off.
If an engineer doesn't come by to cool plasma, start that for him, it's really simple.

But from there, just go wild and try whatever to make a meme filter, a meme mixing area, whatever you want, but it's really not needed. You should also watch your values, the mixing room and stuff. If borgs are being weird, replace them with manual values, but don't do it before that, because that's metagaming otherwise.

>>165308157
AAC/digi valve on the distro and possibly your favorite flavor of pumps to go along with it, I like a passive gate as a backup.
Remove the volume pump on the scrubber like and the mix chamber/distro line and put a normal pipe back for the scrubber.
Cool the scrubber line with space HE pipes.
Just get creative, the worst you can do is touch/look at the plasma miner the wrong way and leak some plasma.

>>165308629
Someone sets vents to internal 0 kPa through some strange mechanism. Do the vents hemorrhage more gas if distro is at 1000 kPa compared to 100 kPa?

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>>165308493
>Atmos Techs setting up power
>Fix breaches
>Fix pipe issues

Don't lie, Atmos players only want to get da Fire Axe flood da Blasma XDD

>>165306636
I want to call you an ass but I understand that it happens. But then, I haven't always been a good partner for similar things so, the blame falls on most, if not all, parties in these kind of things...

>>165307526
i meant what I said as I said it you stupid faggot

>>165308907
Do people really just ignore such a big fucking responsibility like that? Setting up power as the only person in the department should just be implied. It's like doing R&D as the only scientist except if it doesn't get done NOBODY can do their job. Shit like that really gets on my nerves.

Who do you think is best wife / husband material OOC?

http://stats.ss13.moe/
NOW WITH:
Per-month global stats view (I should probably have renamed that link/page)
Index page has:
- Map play rate
- Explosions / match
- Deaths / match

Also, fixed revsquad not showing in global stats

>>165309351
If you see a scientist with a fluff title, 90% of the time they won't do R&D

>>165309467
what makes you think that?

>>165309436
It's the department with the shittiest players, in my opinion.

Cargo is bad because players lack experience, most of the time.
Medbay players are asses because of the stress that they have put on them.

However, science players are usually shitters with bad attitudes despite having both experience AND a complete lack of responsibility besides borging bad guys and handing out ddrills.

>>165309423
>http://stats.ss13.moe/globalstats?month=1&year=2017&timespan=monthly

What is defined as a win/loss?

Is it the crew winning? Or the antag winning? Or is it based on the score?

>>165309771
They're pretty bad. It takes like, 5-10 minutes to do R&D so people can get what they need out of it, but they all just leave to do their fluff titled jobs and ignore it.
Cargo is usually okay in my experience, if there's a QM there's a higher chance of it being good.
But yeah, as a medbay player, it just isn't very fun sometimes so it makes you moody.

You are an engineer. You see a mechanic steal an engineering hardsuit, an engineering GPS, and a jetpack. However, he comes back 20 minutes later with the gooncode and returns the suit and jetpack. How do you react?

>>165309374
Based on the discord, kammerjunk, celt, amikawaii, and zenny seem to be among thr more levelheaded and friendly, so i vote them

>>165310004
Antag winning.
In the case of individual antag modes, it's:
antag objectives succeeded / antag objs total > 0.49

Which in layman's terms means that, for every antag, if ALL of their objectives completed are more than half of all objectives, they got a mode win.

Which is really dumb in the case of modes like wizard, but it's what I've got.

I keep forgetting to clarify who "won" on the page.

Is there a mirror in the wizard den?

>>165306928
>>165307031
>>165307087
I fucking love ss13.

>>165310363
I don't react to it because i'm not autistic enough to sperg out over someone taking a hardsuit as mechanic

>>165310363
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HpXFQaQGLq0

>>165308530
Heres your (you), smelly autist.

>>165310363
I report his theft to the authorities so the full force of the DMCA can be applied to his criminal ass.

>>165309771
>>165310043
Science is my favorite department but I've stopped playing it almost entirely because everyone just fucks off silently for the entire round.

One time I was playing science all day and there was this one guy who would go straight to making bombs, blow up the test range, then go AFK for the rest of the round. Finally one round he rolled traitor and blew up medbay like five minutes in and forced a shuttle. Never saw him in science after that. This is basically science in a nutshell.

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Is the color changing too obnoxious?

>>165311778
NERF TTV BOMBS

ADD NEW BOMBS THAT ADD A DEFUSAL MECHANIC TO THE GAME, BUT INCREASE THE BOMB CAP.

>>165311778
I used to really enjoy playing robotics, but when you're the only person in science you end up being gimped by not having access to most of the department. And if I go scientist, you end up just spending all your time in R&D without any time to do robo stuff because no one else will. Really drained the fun out of the role because it was either: be bored in R&D all round just printing stuff for people or get bitched at for being in robo.

>>165311995
I'm fine with it.
Could make it so it goes slower and it might be better

>>165312046
when u code it

>>165312076
Fuck, it's so obnoxious. I used to play RD like every round and I would end up having to do R&D myself 90% of the time because no one wants to do anything. You get the occasional round where someone wants to do something cool like build a robot boxing arena but there are rounds where I won't see another scientist until shuttle call.

>>165312046
A bomb locating tool and diffusing kit could be cool, bomb squad would be potentially fun

You are an engineer.

You see a disposal line set up to deliver an armed bomb to the bar, where it will blow up and kill six people and also depressurize most of the station. You can't get into the system but you can change the disposal line. You have time to redirect it into a different disposal line, which will go to Virology and kill three players, but not damage the hull or atmos. However, you know from your metagaming that these players are of better quality than the other players, because they were responsible enough to report to virology when they were infect instead of wandering among the rest of the crew. If you do anything else (such as try to just take out a segment of the piping instead of redirecting the bomb), it will blow up and kill you, the AI, and twelve innocent bystanders who are irresponsibly getting in the way of an engineer doing his duty.

Also suppose that your choice will be used as a model for Probe when discussing how to deal with bomb situations, so it will become the standard behavior and thus your choice will be magnified an arbitrarily large number of times.

What do you do?

>>165312781
>You are an engineer.

>You see a disposal line set up to deliver an armed bomb to the bar
Tell sec and move on.

>>165312781
deconstruct the pipe and let the bomb fly into a wall, where I pick it up and just turn it off because it's that easy.

>>165309423
>still doesn't show the player count when starting/ending
one fucking job

>>165312883
>If you do anything else (such as try to just take out a segment of the piping instead of redirecting the bomb), it will blow up and kill you, the AI, and twelve innocent bystanders who are irresponsibly getting in the way of an engineer doing his duty.

>>165312913
That requires lots of tedious work in the game's actual code
And literally anyone can do it

>>165312932
that's not how bombs work, so stop making shit hypotheticals.
If its a proxy sensor, it'll blow when it notices anyone in the range when it's moving. So the chances are it's gonna blow up before it even reaches the bar anyway, and you won't be able to redirect it anywhere anyway.

>>165312781
wonder what the fuck went wrong in my life for me to be playing the worst department in the game

>>165312781
slice the pipes and blow myself up because i am metagaming scum

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what's up, space nerds

>>165312990
>That requires lots of tedious work
>literally anyone can do it
As if the "anyone can do it" statement wasn't false already, those two are mutually exclusive. What a crummy excuse, just say you don't want to do it.

>>165313031
>The people who play engineering in space station 13 are so autistic, their response to the trolley problem would be "REEE TROLLEYS DON'T WORK THAT WAY REEE"

Truly the most easily disturbed of spacemen

>>165313163
you can solve the trolley problem without anyone dying, and in this case it is extremely easy to solve due to the way bombs work

>>165313178
MOODS

>>165313163
this isn't the trolley problem.
this is trying to use a bad hypothetical to justify changing something in the game.

>Also suppose that your choice will be used as a model for Probe when discussing how to deal with bomb situations, so it will become the standard behavior and thus your choice will be magnified an arbitrarily large number of times.

Things work in a set way in space. This isn't anything like the trolley problem because the game has very set mechanics you can't just bend to your will, like you could with a runaway trolley.

>>165313178
>cat ears are literally a part of their hair
how the fuck does this even work

WTF IS HAPPENING

Really MoMMI? The server?

>>165313995
derelict mommis crashed the server with a trash engine

>>165313995
ITS STILL UP STOP ICK OCKING

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>>165312245
Slowing it down helped it quite a bit.
Much more relaxing to look at now.

so what happened to the preferences tab? I can't change my preferences to hear admin midi's or see OOC
I'm assuming it's been adjusted or moved?

>>165314346
In the menu bar in the top left of the window, press settings -> general settings.

>>165314425
cool thanks. I figure I should update byond too, since it's been months since I was on last

I NEED TO SEE MISSION END REPORT

C L O W N C A P T A I N

Avalona you are guilty of treason, report to the execution chamber at once.

Cool Bear here.
Just letting you all know, greed's not cool, and drugs aren't cool.

Check out this kickflip, bro.

POWER TO STAGE ONE EMITTERS IN 3, 2, 1!

>>165314315
I love it.

>>165314585
A real hero, too bad we didn't get to face off with PUNISHED STEPH.

>guns and all access for everyone
>station doesnt immediately fall apart
>real captain goes brain dead right after he joins and sees clown captain
sad.

>Pulled off a grand heist of the AI core with Spraticuz and Cool Bear
>Saved the station from the greedy AI
>Went from graffiti artist to real human bean
>Blob memes on us all in the home stretch

We truly were the LazyTown.

>play assistant
>usually only play assistant on box because I know maint like the back of my hand
>decide to play assistant on deff
>find library
>find strip club
>find cafe
>couldn't even find everything in an extended round because I was having so much fun playing bartender in the cafe
wtf I love deff now???

what are mommis supposed to do during blob?

>>165314746
>>165314569
DUDE WHAT THE FUCK
THE SECOND AVALONA TRIED TO STAGE A COUP EVERYTHING WENT TO SHIT

CLOWN CAP WAS THE B E S T

Cap here.
Jew AI is the best.

>>165314813
Kill themselves or fuck off.

For the record, S.T.A.L.I.N. had an ion law that all villains and heroes were non-human.

>>165314895

>Stalin makes me confirm that I'm a hero when I'm calling the shuttle and preventing a recall

Spoopy

>>165314638
https://youtu.be/MF0Hj2mwH84

>clown captain
>decoy clown captain
>real captain (braindead)

>>165314986
???

I gave Sparticruz a sleep toxined potato

>>165315194
?????

So what happened to Zenny Hunt after he defied my rule?

Literally never saw him again after that first time.

Medical was a nightmare that round.

Thank you, blob. Thank you for the sweet release.

>kurt jacobs reenacting we are number one with the rotten suit
>faxes centcomm for heroes
>their best men are assembled into a squad is assembled: Spraticuz, Sleepy Steph, Owlman and Cool Bear
>get deployed
>kurt rotten and co spray water and bananas everywhere
>it fails and they run off
>the crew go to the bar and are horrified at how unhealthy it all is
>"this ain't cool"
>totally not Kurt Rotten appears and asks I escort them to medbay
>I do so and I am rewarded with a potato
>it was a candy potato
>Kurt fucks up the reenactment and Spraticuz is left in virology for like 10 minutes
>escape to find the crew has been seperated, find cool bear and ivy
>apparanrtly the AI has gone mad with money
>break in and install paladin
>the JUSTICE was too much and it preferred to die with dosh, than live without
>entire team regroups and we do generic hero shit with all the viruses about
>skeleton consumes cool bear
>steph is shattered by grief
>we fear she may become VENOM STEPH
>blob hits
>SLIP AND SLIDE ON THIS BANANA LUBE
>the remaining heroes and the clown beater make it to the centcomm ferry

That was certainly something.

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>>165315323
>just wanted to do some genetics
>wrap it up after distributing injectors
>realize things were far worse than I thought
>come back and get a second virus
>cure it AS A BLOB IS DESTROYING VIROLOGY
>walk out of viro and slip on lube, flying right into ANOTHER BLOB AND INSTANTLY DIE

>>165315606
Honk

>>165315194
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l_SKGOwcFTQ&feature=youtu.be&t=2m

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Would it still be fun today?

Reminder that the only gamemodes were Traitor, Monkey Virus, Meteor, Blob, and Nuke Ops

>>165316402
Someone should re-create it as a vault or such

>>165316616
I mean, it's already what the derelict is

>>165316402
>>165316616
The station that derelict is based off of is basically this

>>165316683
>>165316712
Oh shit, I had no clue

>>165316740
Look closely at the top right and imagine the research section of the derelict. Then walk your minds eye down the corridor traveling south. You'll be able to recognize command.

>>165316402
>The AI upload death corridor
Deff doesn't go far enough

>>165316402
>>165316683
>tfw you realize that the giant hole near the bottom of the Derelict is where Atmos was on Oldstation

really interesting

>>165316402
>there's actual grilles covering all the windows
oldmappers knew what they were doing, none of this "central highway has fishtank windows with no purpose other than to cause breaches"

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>Baldman returns

Did fatbaldbastard really come back?

serb dead again?

ded?

ded serb?

serb please :c
It was so comfy.

rip

>you were just about to rough up an uppity cargo tech
>serb dies

>>165318405
yeah I was about ready to go chill with the greyshits

>>165318417
>learning how to mechanic, replacing airlock assemblies
comfy ruined

Is this just going to happen everytime I do a time intensive role? Christ.

>greyshits actually make the bar comfy
>serb dies

>@**$. Saigon Sam is currently being harmed, as they are having a bad day. It's your sole duty to cheer him up.

Did we cheer you up?

>>165318453
>dougal the turboshitter crashes the serb to escape a good ol' robusting

shame

>>165318505
I was halfway done with an SME on the derelict

>you were about to destroy the shipping computer to stop a shitboi from ordering his b&e tools
feels bad, man

>>165318542

i was so cheered up ;-;

>>165318554
if he stuck by his guns and had a legit reason besides "gloves for engineering only" while wearing gloves i would have left him alone. >>165318672
i would have just stunned you and taken yours

>>165318795
Thats fair enough

I wasnt going to give you gloves because I know the only reason that the only reason people order gloves is so they can break into places

I had gloves on because I usually just order the crate at the start to fuck off and be a greyshit + but i was alone in cargo so I actually had to do my job

What do you guys think of the new laser beam sprites?

>>165318928
>the only reason people order gloves is to break into places

I order them every round I do a ghetto bar build, kinda hard to do it without them and I'm not going to go breaking into engineering for them.

>>165318554
>if you don't give security everything they ask for you're a shitter
nice meme KIDDO
>>165319053
If I was given an explanation besides "fuck you gibb globes" maybe i would have given them gloves, but if you really want to break into somewhere as the HoS go get your battering ram

>>165312781
Let it kill the people in the bar because if I switch the pipes then I become responsible for the death of the players in virology and promptly banned for grief.
Best you can do is yell for to clear because there's a bomb in the bar.

>>165312781
Would be better as a borg, where you MUST act. An engineer can just shrug it off and repair the breach.

>>165318305
nexis, you melt

>>165319157
>not giving security everything they ask for

>heh, sure would be a shame if those security shitters didn't get what they needed :)

holy fuck

ban request when

>>165318928
i had all access why the fuck would i need to get gloves to break into places, 9/10 any breaking into places is in response to HELP VIRO NOW

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>be borg
>guy flying around outside shuttle with a pulse rifle, doesnt say anything
>still flying around outside the shuttle there's a busted out window
>not sure whats going on
>autistic screeching of STOP STOP STOP
>havent even fired at him, just following him around
>Fire a taser round as he's cornered since i have no idea if he depressurised or not
>I miss but he flies off into space
>Comes back later
>go out to see him
>STOP STOP STOP
>doesnt say anything else then starts firing a pulse rifle at me
>Get blinded, but I managed to hit the taser shot
>proceeds to curse me out and say im violating my laws
>autistic screeching
>just put him in sec area of shuttle and listen to him bitch for the shuttle ride home

why is slate slabrock literally the worst?

>>165320676
yes

>>165320256
>Security guards NEED insulated gloves to do their job
>Security guards NEED RCDs to do their job
nice meme
>>165320543
Sorry for not assuming you had all access mang, usually HoS' don't have that
Again, if you even tried to explain why you needed gloves you could have said that instead of "GIB GLOBES NOW ASSHOLE" or tasing me several times

>>165320676
>havent even fired at him, just following him around
fucking lier

[22:06:26]ATTACK: HEROBOT (errantaron) fired the taser gun (proj:electrode) at space (319,237,1) <<<<< firing on me right here
[22:06:33]ATTACK: Hachi (soose) has stripped a chef's uniform from Leland Shaner's uniform ()
[22:06:34]ATTACK: Hachi (soose) has stripped some black shoes from Leland Shaner's feet ()
[22:06:34]ATTACK: Hachi (soose) has stripped Chef's apron from Leland Shaner's suit ()
[22:07:02]ATTACK: Slate Slabrock (boondoggy1) fired the pulse rifle (proj:pulse) at space (316,237,1)
[22:07:03]ATTACK: Slate Slabrock (boondoggy1) fired the pulse rifle (proj:pulse) at space (315,237,1)
[22:07:04]ATTACK: Slate Slabrock (boondoggy1) fired the pulse rifle (proj:pulse) at the lattice (315,236,1)

>telling you to stop twice is autistic screeching

>>165321068
>hachi keeps making his way onto unrelated logs for absolutely no reason

>>165320676
Because he plays this game like an FPS.

>>165321068
what does 'fire a taser round as he's cornered since i have no idea if he depressurised or not' mean to you
or
'i miss but he flies off into space'

its almost like you didnt bother to read my post

>>165301504
>Be me
>Order Medical Crate
>Get a bunch of auto injectors
>Fill them with chloral
>Hand the box to security and tell them I found these in Avada's secret Maint Fort
>Security nods at me, and tells me they will kill her
>Hear over the radio she was killed
>I wasnt even an antag and I got her killed

Feels good desu.

>>165321229
why would you fire at me, you had no reason to, i assumed you were subverted. So am i just supposed to assume you are friendly after you fired on me on asimov for now concrete reason

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>>165321489
because you didnt say anything other than telling me to stop you mongoloid and someone broke the fucking windows. you were the most likely culprit because you were the only one with a gun out.

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>Thinking I should do some space
>Eh, maybe after I rea...
>Byond feed beeps with Higoten saying just singing in the rain.
>As a tremor hits
WAKE ME UP

>>165321489
>guy flying around outside shuttle with a pulse rifle, doesnt say anything
what about this is hard to understand
he fired towards you because you were suspicious as fuck and probably broke the windows

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>>165321489
>Had a pulse rifle out
>In space
>why would you fire at me, you had no reason to
SHUTTLE SHOOTER DINDUNUFFIN, GREYS DID 2424, NANOTRASEN PUTS FLOURIDE IN YOUR TAP WATER

>>165321489
>silent autist flying around in space with a rifle out
>flying around right next to several shattered, depressurized windows
>wtf why did you shoot me
What is the problem with your brain, Slate?

>>165321645
Slate Slabrock/Boondoggy1 (@315,235,1) As Galactic Common : STOP
Slate Slabrock/Boondoggy1 (@323,242,1) As Galactic Common : BORG
Slate Slabrock/Boondoggy1 (@323,242,1) As Galactic Common : A guy had a gun

before the exchange happened of fire happened, all you had to do was stop following my silently like you were going to gank me and ask me to explain myself more

>>165322028
i flew back after he fired on me and tried to explain myself, he comes out and runs at me after i try to back down telling him to stop, what am i supposed to think

>>165320927
Honestly, an RCD is pretty competitive for sec if you run a fourth backpack "box" so you have a couple extra slots instead of a scanner/second gun and either get the antique or plan on ignoring shit to get two AEG kits. You can just mag up, pop the floor and hit your haha eat shit kiddo macro.

>>165322259
Extra slots for spare chips*

how is it that it's always evangelyne who goes about making stuff the most unfun possible

>>165322149
use of lethal weapons is not permitted

>>165323187
No, I mean 'vamp round? bomb half the base' unfun. At that point you're not even /trying/ to complete the objective.

>>165323225
We should force antags to do their objectives or gimmicks every time desu.

>>165323225
>Being an objective shitter
Most of the objectives are a joke and the rest get more boring the longer you play. Dare to dream and antagonize outside the box.

>>165323164
usage does not equal possession, you never saw me use a weapon before that though, in fact all evidence at that point showed that i wasnt going to, given the fact that you fired on me and i didn't return fire, then ran away to deescalate the situation.

>>165323294
>>165323541
You guys do how you guys do, I just don't see what's the point of blowing up half the base as a vampire when other fun things are trying to happen mid-round. Not every antag should be forced to do the same gimmicks in order to get their missions done, but at least land somewhere in the same ballpark.

I'm probably overreacting, but for god's sake that was way too extra and I was looking forward to the away mission.

>>165323740
Pulses are too high of a risk when combined with deviant behavior. Belt it if you got a problem.

>>165323792
I blow up have the base and then recall spam until the fix it

>>165323842
Sarah Johson go away

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Need some feedback again.
Any suggestions for improving this, the heads in particular?
Planning on making 2 more VS sections with Sec VS Cargonia and Clown VS Mime, but I want to get it looking properly first.

>>165324558
guy in the left needs to have a red uniform, other than that, p good

>>165324584
Left one is the captain though. Guess it might be more recognizable if I switch out his cap with his helmet.

>>165324771
That looks more like a beret

>>165322028
>muh potential harm

>>165325183
Yeah, you're right.
At least that means I can re-use it for sec.

I don't know what this game is but you guys are worse than /feg/
I like it here

>>165323056
Some weaboo faggot.
Lets collectively report the images so he gets banned and will stop shitting our already shitty thread further.

>>165325362
You play as a role on the space station and shill your waifu character in the thread into forced meme status until you get banned.
Lather rinse repeat.

>>165323842
Note that some Law 2 Requests can be tricky. If there's outstanding possibility ofimmediate harm you can ignore the order.

Right from the fucking wiki, I don't see how the head of security, not shooting at anyone, after telling you why the shuttle was broken, counts as outstanding possibility of immediate harm to another person especially when there is a stun setting on the weapon.

>someone comes up to your front window and asks for something from your department
>you give it to them
>they do not say thank you

How do you get even?

>>165324558
>>165324584
>>165324771
what he said. sec fights assistants. captain fights.. nothing. or everyone depending on what kinda shift it is.

still thats a sick sign

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>>165325362
no i'm pretty sure that feg is exactly like here.

>>165326061
plasmaflood

>>165326061
Get a borg to stun them and bring them back to say it
>captcha: calle borgo

During that round my UI froze four (4) times.

And the nanoUI maps STILL aren't loading.

>>165326760
>And the nanoUI maps STILL aren't loading.
Same here

>>165326827
Yeah they're totally fucked and no one knows why.

Oh yeah that reminds me.

>be geneticist on Deff earlier
>assistant follows a doctor into genetics dragging a body and ejects my monkeyman and moves me away from my console
>puts it in another one after i get huffy and starts making a UI+UE
>the fucking hell you walk into here and wordlessly mess with the equipment for something dangerous
>push him and disposal him
>he comes back and gets in an AI fight with me over opening the doors to genetics
>sec never comes to deal with it so I ask the AI to bolt the doors
>he comes back again and welds through the wall
>push him over again and disposal him again
>he comes back AGAIN and decides it isn't worth the fight and leaves
I never knew what he wanted or why. He never said a word to me. He just really wanted to either change his identity or fuck someone elses up. All he had to do was ask and give some reasonable excuse.

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>tfw play /vg/ for the interactions and fun ideas people come up with
>tfw i haven't seen anybody who's fun to be around/does cool shit for a month, just mute hippie shitters who collect valids and call the shuttle
fuck
where do i play now that /vg/ is overrun with deathmatching faggots

>>165327656
Anon its 3am no ones even awake to get baited try again in 12 hours when some dumb cucks gonna buy your shit.

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SQUAREDANCING
WHEN

Bearer of the autism
Seek pipes. Larger, more voluminous pipes.
Seek the MoMMI Nest. That is the only way.
Lest this station swallow you whole
As it has so many others

>>165327876
Its almost 2 of the afternoon, cmon anon, its not that early :^)

>>165327876
>there can't possibly be people who like RP on VG lmao
>lmao its just bait RP isnt real go back to bay

Fuck off back to Hippie, shitter.

>>165327937
S Y D N E Y

>>165327956
>VG
>instantly going to the hippie shitter line

day in day out anon. it doesn't get any fresher but you keep trying.

please innovate.

>>165327937
>BEING IN THE WRONG PART OF THE WORLD

>>165327956
Please be in Australia

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*ping

>>165326995
>communication
>even a modicum of interaction with other players besides clicking on them to make them horizontal
Go back to bay you fucking faggot

>it's an admin didn't get the map they wanted so they re-roll and kill the servers population

What's something simple you want coded or sprited?

>>165328939
Sadly no the master controller is causing map voting to go haywire. We should have it sorted out tomorrow.

Sorry we didn't catch it in testing.

>>165328982
remove the walls from treadmills so people can walk over them, it'll create a new engine.

>>165328982
Mixing soda with candy to create exploding cans.

>>165329020
Treadmills are already an engine and they don't work without the unidirectional wall If walking forward made you dismount from the treadmill it would be super annoying to use

>see the QM with stun glubbs
>hes afk
>take them
>turn them into security
>comms off
>its fucking malf
>go to science to shut it all down
>QM is there
>QM repeatedly tables me
>cant do anything and science is incompetent
>AI borgs everyone with no resistance

good round everyone

>>165328982
Spider pheromones or a plasma pistol in the armory of Box.

>>165329020
wouldnt it make more sense just to have piezoelectrical floor tiles instead?

>>165329173
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YjUCjNQxjrU

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>>165328982
More chaplain-y stuff would be nice. Perhaps a glowy thing behind their heads like a lot of religious imagery?

Maybe a cross to crucify themselves on?

>>165329313
>Perhaps a glowy thing behind their heads like a lot of religious imagery?
..."Halo". The word you're looking for is "halo".

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>>165329173
>Fucking with the Quartermaster
That isn't some lowly assistant. You did the right thing but you have to appreciate who you messed with. It's like stealing the clowns PDA. You can do it but there will be repercussions.

>>165329367
I always assumed halo's were the rings you typically see on the heads of angels. Didn't know the two were one and the same.

Sheesh.

>>165329367
>>165329387
Halo also refers to the rings of light you see around a light source if your vision is unfocused (such as if you need glasses but aren't wearing them), and can also refer to something which is High Altitude Low Orbit

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Unban 2hotdogs

>nexis is back
>He doesn't play he just observes
>Not even an admin
>He just codes for us

What brings him back?

>>165330729
free kingston

>>165330813
autism

>>165330813
Don't question the eggman, just go with it

So whats Emilia like? Havent seen her shitting around or meming the one minute.

>>165330813
>nexis is back
great
>He doesn't play he just observes
understandable when the server is full of shitters
>Not even an admin
why would he? babysitting autists is terrible
>He just codes for us
coding is fun

>>165329267
what the fuck is that and how do i make one

>>165331496
Emilia is some random waifu haired nerd who thinks being a greyshirt is all about tiding and missing the whole point about the tide, which is the core principle that stealing what people will not use is fine and dandy, but its not all you do or all you should do.

Greytide is more than senseless grief, its a sort of anarchic state of mind, a revolution against those that mistreat you just because they are above you, a sort of karmic justice system against people who abuse power or are plain outright dicks, those that fuck with the tide or the station enough get tided back, as should be, stealing is just part of the fun, but thinking mindless authority hate, petty theft and id stealing is what the tide is all about is just dumb, its a excuse to grief.

>>165331496
>wears a maid dress and cat ears every round
>claims that they aren't a waifu
Really gets the noggin joggin'

>>165325193
>ZAS
>"potential" harm
lol?

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tres amigos

I want to hug the pink haired mime!

>>165330813
not nexis, but observing rounds is very relaxing

>tfw too hungry to commit myself to ss13

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bully.exe

>>165331496
>Whenever I see Emilia, they're an assistant
>They ALWAYS are fucking with sec
>They ALWAYS are looking for shit they shouldn't have

This isn't what being an assistant is.

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>>165333880
But every single assistant is like this.

>>165333956
No, they're not against authority for the sake of being against authority. A good assistant will support a good crew.

>>165333549
Shut the fuck up Avada

>>165334092
hey avada is a decent mime
kind of
at the very least they're not a moron who can't do something funny

like me

>>165334465
>Decent mime

Never actually seen them do mime things

"I need feminism to removr the stigma from getting my cervix tickled by horsecock."

T. Kammerjunk

>>165334575
the fuck kind of shitposting is this

>>165326148
Are there any Tsundere waifus in spess

>>165334539
they kinda do the whole 'partner up with clown for antics' thing
at least whenever i noticed their mime

>>165334539
Literally just plays an assistant who can't talk. Insulateds and sunglasses at round-start.

I'm new to ss13, how many players per round are on the /ss13g/ on average? How many people will yell at me for being a assistant if I'm still learning things?

>>165335965
It varies by server and by time. During our most active hours we have 70-80 people on, during our least active hours we average 20-30.

Assistants have literally no responsibilities, so no one will care if you don't know all the common mechanics yet, because no one expects you to do anything anyway.

>>165335965
You don't play assistant to learn things but to learn the UI

once you learn the UI, play Cargo or if you feel adventurous, Engineering.

There's maybe 30-50 people on average, 60+ during high traffic and <20 during comfy lowpop nighttime.

>>165335965
Depends, usually 10 people at lowish pop, less than 40 on high pop, and almost nobody will yell or berate you so long as you actually say you are new. You get a pass for that, don't worry.

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WELCOME XP x Sproinkle is my OTP. You two were fantastic that round, and sec deserved it all. Well done.

Thank you WELCOME XP for that hilarious round of pettiness. I forgive you for crunching my leg a bit and not delivering on that food thing.

>try to put power cells in all the abandoned deff rooms
>miss 2

FUCK

>>165337258
Clown rules, sec drools

>>165337315
I did my very best. Did give a shoutout through the service channel for food, but no chefs available. Would've tasked a borg with it, but I was a little pre-occupied. Sorry.

> start a round as a comfy lowpop shitcurity Grey warden
> just me and a HoS
> some assistant comes with the title "security cadet" and asks to join sec, I implant him and he later gets HoS access when the original dies
> fuck around for a bit, clown's stolen the spare, just the usual yakety, he escapes perma because I left his captain-ID with him, we keep running around and escalating while I camp the AI upload and get shooed out by the grey-hating ASIMOV while I get paranoid that the clown will order it to torture me or something
> AI gradually starts getting more and more obtuse with security, and the new HoS lashes out by destroying a borg as I tell him to stop and to just fix the laws, escalating to the point where the new HoS and I get stuck bolted in a room together while our prisoners run free
> we slowly and agonizingly make our way to the AI upload over the course of a painful thirty minutes where the HoS just gets more and more argumentative and less useful
> we finally get in and I upload PALADIN hoping that'll fix it
> still obtuse so I upload a freeform designating the warden and HoS as the "ultimate good and highest authority"
> STILL obtuse
> AI finally reveals that the whole reason it's pissed is because the HoS killed that borg
> I stuncuff him and the AI's now very willing to cooperate with me, actively opens doors, etc
> plot twist: HoS was a vamp the whole time, escapes by glaring
> crew just keeps getting more and more pissed
> upload ASIMOV + onehuman and tell AI to just uphold space law and side with the more innocent person
> crew is really pissed now when I tell the AI to reveal all laws
> go back to brig, get critted by HoS, borgs kill him
> they drag me to medbay where I get cuffed and anesthesized by a newly joined sec member and brought to full health
an excellent story and learning experience, highest thanks to the AI, clown, and that Bob Dole Guy who I sleepered and gave 20 units of sedative so AI wouldn't release him some way

>>165338129
>one human the AI as non antag
Be really fucking careful with that, AI can go full AWOL any time you lose your life.

>>165338129
Ah that's what you did to me, I thought I was stuck in there cause I was cuffed.

Is it okay for mimes and clowns to love each other?

>>165340273
No

Is it normal for a round to last 13 hours and longer?

>>165341954
Hell no
At least not on /vg/

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>>165341954
Only when there are no assistants around.

>>165341954
I remember the legendary 6 hour round we had a while ago

>>165341954
Depends on the server.
/vg/ rounds are usually 1-2 hours each. /tg/ rounds last I checked were about 30-45 minutes each.

>>165342229
Derp, misread your post.
I think even bay struggles to reach 13 hours.

>>165342317
even bay gets bored and calls for a ccrew transfer after like 3 hours

>>165341954
You should speak to your physician about such matters

reminder that when you transplant a brain, you can just defib the new body, no need for cloning.

>its a 'rin drags a locker around and taze+cap lasers people and thinks this is something to be proud of' episode

The new wave of faggots really is making this server shitty to play on or even observe.

Remember when we almost got carabiners? Those would've been really nice for Cargo.

>>165343771
it has been like this forever

>>165343771
Ban request it then :^)

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>It's another Rin has a murderboner episode
oh wait
It's every episode

>>165343771
well, to be fair the vampire did tell all the thralls to kill each other, since only one would be allowed on the shuttle, what are you complaining about?

>>165343872
because I watched Rin ask the vamp for the deathmatch in the first place

>>165343771
the goal isn't to be liked, it's to be acknowledged

I'm sure he's masturbating right now to the idea that someone on the internet burned calories complaining about him

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>atmos tech vamp
>grabbed the spare
>quickly knock out telecomms and power
>blew the borgs
>glarecuffed 4 people to quickly get full power
>thralled the warden
>thralled a doc
>started my thrallmill in medbay and revived everyone I killed.

The rest was history. My only regret was fugging telecomms so hard.

>>165344478
give us a code word next time you nigger

>>165344478
>no ai
>no competent heads

being antag at like 3 am must be the easiest god damn thing

>>165344742
It's why we get so many murderboners

>>165344742
yeah it lets me murderbone the whole station every time and then pretend to be upset about it on the shuttle

>>165343771
[06:34:23]SAY: Harse Theef/(Felicity Rivera) (@226,250,1) has made a captain announcement: Attention crew, this is your Vampire Empress speaking. I am officially ordering you all to have A BATTLE TO THE DEATH, LAST ALIVE ON THE STATION GETS TO RIDE THE SHUTTLE HOME WITH ME! LEAVE TO SURVIVORS BUT ME! ANYTHING GOES! As long as it does not hurt me. seems pretty clear

>>165345296
Fuck off

>>165345296
>Felicity will never be your vampire empress

Why live?

Sorry for my mistakes, first ai round in ages.

>>165345965
Call it roleplay and you are set.

>>165345296
w e w

>>165313162
Those aren't mutually exclusive. It means the work is simple but time consuming and tedious.

There are lots of coding projects that would qualify under that.

>>165346607
Honestly, half the problems with oldcode would be very time-consuming and tedious but simple to fix.

>>165345759

Back off, I want her to make me her thrall and force me to hold her hand!

>>165342110
We've had a 6 hour round, 2 5 hour rounds, and a 7 hour round within the last 6 months

All because of the tomb of rafid or a dorf fort left neglected

>>165330875
frit til hor helvede ven

>>165348550
don't take that tone with me

Breast sliders when?

>>165349063
When we get breasts.

>>165349063
bug the guys from eros

>>165350497
Eros is a shithole now though

>>165350587
that was quick

>>165350636
such are things when furries take over

>>165350636
Anon speaks the truth. That place is a good example of power tripping admins and idea guys who cant code.