/ss13g/ - spessmen on a spess station

first for holographic waifu tube

>>162859285
xth for BUFF PAI

>>162859242
>When there is more than one clown on the station

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vrj46wdh9jo

don't turn your fucking house into a botnet kids

>>162859556
Too late i already installed windows 10 senpai

>>162859707
rip

So, what's the difference between filling a smol tank at 1013 kpa and a big one at 1013 kpa?

>>162860120
Pressure =/= size
The smaller one has way less room for gas, even if that gas is pressurized as much as it is in the bigger one

>>162860120
kpa is pressure, you breathe mols. fill two cans and you will see that one holds more mols.

I'd be really, really happy if Celt finally leaved.

Alright. What was the deal with the biohazard.

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>2 hours of being a borg for a milf that doesn't do anything the whole shift

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BEST WAIFU

>>162860678
It was made MALF later, I believe that it was extended before like 2 hours.

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>>162860678
I was the warden.
I got the fuzzy tingling in my balls that it was malf when the only prisoners coming in were just people being dicks to eachother, that's when I started asking you if you were a nice borgo that wouldn't hurt nobody.

>>162860812
nah dude, I spawned with the malf law

>>162860536
Do we get to eat him yet for failing us.

Alright, let me understand the drama with Celt.
He's a guy that works for free on the code and people want him to go, right? Why?

>>162860812
It was malf the whole round

>>162861151
because he's irish

>>162861196
So you're all really memeing and there's no real hate towards him?
meh-tier meme, if I do say so myself

>>162861151
he said he can do like 100 bug fixes in a week and joked that he would step down from being an admit if he couldn't; yesterday he opened pr bug fixes done by someone else and now people are joking that he should step down because he didn't do them himself. The drama is only real in your head

>>162861151
because he added the STUPID FUCKING MICROWAVE TO MEDBAY

>>162861274
not quite memeing. i want him gone so cluster can take his rightful throne as god emperor of the code

>>162861331
>yesterday he opened pr bug fixes done by someone else
lacking some context here, this makes it sound like he stole the fixes or something
someone else gave the fixes to him and let him use his name as a joke

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humans best waifus, xeno-fuckers get out

>>162830380
>hiding shit
>as a crab

>>162860683
I'm really getting tired of your furshit.
>>162861765
I'm really tired of your degeneracy.

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>>162862072
tfw no dominant admin gf to add a third OOC permaban to your rapsheet, further denying your desperate mind from communicating to the other autists out of character

>>162862072
There's no fur on a xeno!!

THE AI JUST BANE MEME'D BAN HE

>>162863469
If I spaced that greyshit, would it hurt?

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How do I get eggs out of a chicken?

>>162863620
*BWOINK*

>>162863678
punch them out

>>162861339
Cargonia would be happy to take that off your hands.

>>162863678
Feed it wheat

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>>162863781
>>162863851
So I feed it, then kill it?

>>162864004
DO not kill the chicken

>>162864004
since i like the image i'll stop lieing. don't kill it, just feed it wheat. you can build an incubator with some shit and hatch the egg for more chikuns and therefore more eggs and therefore more chikuns and so on

>>162864004
DO kill the chicken

>>162864004
Feed it wheat then kill it, yes.

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>page 10

>>162866843
dead thread dead serb

Anyone know what rate normal reagents metabolize at? Is it 0.1u per tick, or more?

>>162867284
When reading Chemistry-Reagents, keep these in mind:
REAGENTS_METABOLISM = 0.2
REM = REAGENTS_EFFECT_MULTIPLIER = REAGENTS_METABOLISM / 0.4 = 0.2 / 0.4 = 0.5
So derma, for instance, metabolises at 0.2 and heals for 3 * REM = 3 * 0.5 = 1.5

Did you know that if you have a borer inside of you, you can survive with no oxygen, no pressure and no blood inside of you in cold space without a hardsuit? Thanks friend, that was hilarious.

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>randomname assistant with the first name Kingston
>make meds for chemistry (albeit only keloderm/antitox/bicard because i was busy making essential chems like foam surfuctant and ran out of power), medical man chlorals me and drags me out
>go back and try to make more meds, medical man chlorals+cages me and tells nobody to open it, so i open it and leave
>master plan to get the HoP drunk on amasec and then steal his ID
>i do so, get away, give my ID all access, and get a taser before giving the ID back and getting away scot-free
>tase+cage the medical man, he did the same to me earlier and i want to give him his own little wild ride
>drag him around and soon the entire security force and medbay is after me
>run away, tase the detective, lead everyone to the mortuary
>get caught before i can force medical man to "confess" by screaming into his face
>suddenly medbay explodes and depressurizes half the station, ZAS hell
>the only, ONLY room not affected on the left side of the station was the mortuary
>tfw i lead many people to the only room where they could survive
>tfw i kept half of medbay's staff alive when medbay itself was targeted
>tfw i was the savior of the station
>tfw i was spaced for my noble deed
FREE
KINGSTON

I am impressed by Heroinehero007's ability to quickly assemble bombs from my materials without any assistance. I dipped out to help make telecryo for just a few minutes.

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Well the science department was pretty damn amazing in this round. No shitters and everybody being competent except that we didnt space the fucking clone with the teleporter the moment he enterd. Like seriousily, if any fucker (especially the fucking clown) snoops around inside science then you allready know that they are only there to steal our shit and use it to be shit.

>>162868303
>webuild.png

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>>162868189

>>162868353
how new are you?

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I was in that malf round earlier. Cargo's fucking terminal glitched out and stopped working for no reason leaving me with literally nothing to do but sit on my rainbow coloured ass. The only solution I could find was getting incredibly drunk and spacing myself. Also anyone know how to commmit an efficent suicide? Rather than just hitting yourself in the head untill you go into crit and bleed/take to much crit damage.

>>162868157
Godspeed Detective, you even made it out of the server before all that Hyperzine exploded your heart.

>>162868457
If it glitches out unscrew it, and unwrench it, and then re-wrench it and rescrew it.

>>162868457
Use a duck to gib yourself with the suicide command

>>162868457
Chaplain and Cargo can space themselves pretty easily. I've done it accidentally as both.

>>162868457
Pretty sure there's a verb for Suiciding. Like Suicide. See folks do it fairly often. Hey, free meat for burgers.

>>162868457
litterally type suicide

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>>162868603
Also how do I kill myself.

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>>162868448
How do i upvote?
I warned the RD and Security the moment the clown came and had my stun batton and wirecuffs ready to teleport him to another demension but RD told me to just be kind to him and let security handle it or something.
To mutch kind is bad senpai.

>>162868353
>Like seriousily, if any fucker (especially the fucking clown)
Honk

>>162868746
When I tazed and cuffed the clown, I dragged him to security and told him to be a good boy, which he was for a good part of the round. I didn't really wanna deal with an execution or perma for just a clown breaking in, that's like the Clown's job.

>>162868943
Its your job to perma and execute people

>>162868943
>that's like the Clown's job.
The clowns job is to make people laugh.

Something most clowns fail at.

>>162868746
You couldn't have known the clown was evil. He could have been a friendly clown.

Who here would go to training sessions on the test serb if they were held regularly on Saturdays?

>>162869075
> the clowns job is to make people laugh
again, how new are you?

>>162869140
He's not wrong. Sorry that what you read on r/ss13 is wrong.

>>162869130
Depends on what the topics are.

>>162869075
>blowing up half of meta club
>not funny
Also he was a traitor ling. So technically his job was to succ and steal shit/kill people.
Which makes me wonder why he was pretending to be a paramedic

>>162868746
RD here, I gave the clown and mime near all access becuase I was feeling nice that round. Clown said he would be a pal so I took it as that he would avoid fucking up things for science.
As for toxins and his bombs, I know mitchell owen enough to tell when hes antag and if the test bomb looks nice I don't really care to stop him because its a good bomb and I want to see how much it fucks things up. Its like seeing an antag setting up a gimmick, you don't stop them because you want to see how far it goes. He wouldn't really bomb sci anyway becuase that his base of operations

>>162869264
>Why would a ling want to be a paramedic
>The job that has the most reason to find you when you're alone, and knows WHEN you're alone

>>162869254
Engineering, Atmos, and Medbay currently.
Hopefully AI/Silicons, Heads, and Antags eventually.

Others may pop up if the need arises.

Clowns deserve RESPECT. I remember a time when clowns had the protection of a deity, and when they got mistreated, there was hell to pay. What happened to this?

>>162869419
I'd go for a toxins one.

>>162869524
that book where a clown fucked the honkmother was true and that sin ruined all clowns

>>162869524
Clowns got shittier. Plain and simple.

>>162869524
It's the other way around.
A good clown earns respect with robustitude and elite pranks. A shitty clown does not earn respect. Respect is what protects a clown from dying, ergo shitty clowns have very little protection.

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>>162869283
>I was feeling nice that round.
Everyfucking body was nice and kind during the round, thats why it was so comfy

So who stole the IAA's fax after all?

We ended up putting the Chaplain in Perma because he was the most obvious suspect, but I'm not sure we recovered him after the kaboom

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>>162869604
I'd be up for teaching nerds how2toxins gud.

Last 2 times I taught someone the sekrits to bombs I was ling and promptly killed them and assumed their identities.

>>162869191
>l-ledditor!
you dont want to fuck with the clown a lot because there's a small chance that he's going to robust you to suicide
plus he's probably the only one wanting to reach the clown's roid, because the miners are A: unrobust or B: fucking bored
and you dont use cable cuffs, you print some real handcuffs from the hacked lathe

>>162869865
Like a real man!

>>162869865
>you dont want to fuck with the clown a lot because there's a small chance that he's going to robust you to suicide
From my experiences they're more likely to whinge to the admins when they get got for shittery.

>>162868346
Thanks. I'm glad you walked away. Pretending ignorance and trying to talk you into making them for me was too tough.

>>162868746
>having a stun baton as a science guy
the shitter in this situation isnt the clown senpai

>>162869283
>RD
>doesn't stop his underlings from bombing
>compares dudeTTVlmao to an actual gimmick
What the fuck is WRONG with you

>>162869832
Thanks. Let me know if you can next round.

>>162871912
The RD was Ricky

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Heya, if anyone's interesting we're running a 24/7 instance of FTL13 over at byond://jinteki.industries:5513

It's a more cooperative sort've game where it's less about surviving your fellow crew members and more surviving environmental hazards and enemy ships to complete missions.

It's been fun so far.

>>162873286
sounds interesting

>>162873286
Any major divergences from standard SS13 I should be aware of?

>>162873286
Take some video and post it on Youtube.
The concept sounds interesting, but I can't be arsed to bother connecting.

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>>162873710
The gameplay is mostly similar. There are new, specialized roles on the bridge involved ship command, weapons systems, and munitions handling. There's also new stuff in engineering like the FTL drive and Shield Generator. Otherwise it's /tg/station.

You may want to read this:

http://ftl13.com/wiki/index.php?title=Guide_to_FTL13

>>162873874
Link to your Github? There might be some features people would like ported to our server.

>>162873941
https://github.com/FTL13/FTL13

>>162873941
https://gitgud.io/nanotrasen/nullsec

We pull mostly from upstream but we'll be forking a bit down the line.

>>162873286
Fuck off to your own subreddit or something
we only talk about /vg/station here, the offical ss13 server for 4chan

>>162874302
No, we really don't.

>>162874302
It's an SS13 general, not /vg/station general dude. All SS13 goes.

>>162874302
This looks cool, give them a chance.

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>>162874302
Can you fuck off?

while we're talking about spamming negros, someone post the baka spam picture.

>>162871912
>Taking the ttvs so no bombs
Good way to get people to call you a metagaming faggot. I never said bombs were a good thing, but the test blast was pretty good so I gave him the reward of letting it go. I was also doing xenobio so I couldn't have seen them moving bombs around.
If I came to them and said "Hey toxins, that was a pretty good bomb, let me take all of your stuff so you can't work anymore.", thats being a grade A asshole.

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Anne Tagg is cute and very very round!

>>162875627
>the test blast was pretty good so I gave him the reward of letting it go
"you can make a bomb good job go blow up the station"
Never play RD again

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>>162875784

>
>

>>162875784
When will the fat fetishists leave?

>>162872341
Ricky is a good RD.

>>162875627
>If I came to them and said "Hey toxins, that was a pretty good bomb, let me take all of your stuff so you can't work anymore.", thats being a grade A asshole.
how about
"Hey toxins
I see you are doing toxins
if your toxins leave toxins without my supervision I will take away your stuff so you can't work anymore"
in essence the entire point of RD existing as a job title

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>Round starts, walk into xenobio and Ethan is there.
>hes new to xenobio so I just give him a few tips and watch him for awhile
>as we're talking we hear people screaming about a wizard on the radio.
>suddenly, airlock opens and the wizard gets slammed into a wall because of the pressure
dedwiz.JPG

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>>162859242
>give Security Gygax, and bring extra modules, because the Warden and HOS are not responding to texts about what they want on it.
>Warden and HOS nowehere to be found
>Just give the mech to some guard
>Takes him 10 minutes to eject a module he doesnt want
>Warden takes the module he wants and wont put it on the mech
>Warden keeps telling me to leave before we have even finalized the mech
>Security guard then procedes to be an idiot with the mech, boalaing randoms
>He ejects
>Some otheir guard steals it
>Guard lets some assistant slice the mech with the sword until its badly damaged.

I'm glad I killed myself.

>>162876605
As the evil clown who made 4 plasma bombs, he couldnt really have made anymore. I only left one valve I think.

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>>162876639
>proceed to borg the wizard
What a great day.

>>162876713
>giving security mechs and not keeping it for yourself
Lmao your fault

Y'know, Detective is actually pretty fun to play.

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Need to work on my shareX .gif settings or something
Albert Bernd is a true environmentalist

any faster way to swap between armaments in mechs? that HUD is slow as molasses
also >>162876713 may or may not be mentioning me

Toxic waste is literally tasty

>>162859242
>Science can make Gravity Well Guns
>They never make them

>>162876812
You forgot a grille behind the shard to keep it from getting bumped back, and an additional mass driver right in front of it to finish off IDs/remains. Good work though, now redirect all the disposal pipes to that belt.

>>162876806
USeless on game modes beside traitor, ling, and vamp though

>>162876998
on the /vg/ serb? How?

>>162877610
you need to order the nanotrasen tech disk from cargo which ofcourse is why no one does it since the only people with access to approve orders are usually to retarded to push crates out of the cargo shuttle

>>162877941
>you can order tech disks from cargo

What? since when?

https://aberrantkenosis.bandcamp.com/album/the-bike-horn-collection-honk-yourself-a-merry-little-bikehorn
10 days left

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>>162878684
NO HONKING

>>162877941
>Science
>Leaving their autism fort
>Using the request console

Please, we're talking about the fuckers that are too lazy to get their own materials themselves

>>162876806
>AI says something about a corpse, the captain, and a botanist
>the botanist apparently had an encounter with a long and now the captain's dead and AI saw it dragging the captain into maint
>talk to the botanist some, search his stuff and the area around him
>captain's PDA keeps messaging me
>it's the ling that killed the captain
>ling gives me horror/murder mystery esque messages all the time
>search all of maint
>find nothing
>it tells me that I was closer than I thought and to come back to botany
>he stuns me and the botanists and tells me it was a big prank
>I take his word for it and start to leave
>AI tells me not to trust him and that it locked down the "captain" on the bridge
>talk to him some from outside the bridge
>he tells me that he's not really a ling, but he offered to have us cremate him just for peace of mind
>he strips down
>AI is telling me to do it
>borer is telling me to do it
>I cave and cuff him
>he starts yelling at me that he really isn't a ling
>I decide that I'll bring him to robotics and have him be put into an MMI and keep him there until it's all figured out
>he assumes I'm lying and thinks I'm going to have him borged
>he threatens to suicide if we put him into an MMI
>he does
>it was ops
God damn, Zenny. I still don't know if that round was hilarious or fucking dreadful.

>>162875878
>>162876605
>Antag did antag things
>"WAH someone didn't validhunt the person doing their job becuase it could be used to antag WAH"
What you want me to do:
Delete all combat research so no one can make guns because they could antag with them.
Take the exo fabs and blow borgs because people could emag them and make combat mechs.
Space all the ttvs because someone could make a bomb.
Kill and space the slimes because someone could use them harmfully.
Put away the tele computer because they could use it to tele people away.
Bucklecuff all scientists to roller chairs so I can make sure I know what they are doing.
Weld the doors to toxins storage after spacing all the plasma.

This is your ideal science, it sounds horrid. I don't play RD to be an antag hunter, I do it help others. Also watching him in toxins would have just got me killed anyway because he was an antag, and the bomb would have gone off still. If an antag wants to do something in science, the RD isn't a hard target to kill so you can continue your day.

>>162878929
>hurr durr if u don't do other department's jobs ur lazt

>>162879605
hurr durr, they certainly are lazy since I never seen any scientists ever pass Cargo orders.

Only the occasional roboticist throwing me a PDA message.

>>162879574
To be honest you're more of a metagaymer there than they are validhunters in that "situation."

>there are people here right now who don't have a meme 7 dev mix they know works so they don't have to do a test bomb
y'all niggas don't even smoke plasma

>>162877941
OH MY GOD. You mean to tell me, there is EVEN MORE AUTISM TO SCIENCE? Oh man I am gonna do this every time I play science.

>>162882062
I've played for two years and the biggest bomb I've ever made is an IED soda can and a max size gibtonite bomb as tator once

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As a quick question, can sec roles roll antag?
Last time I was sure traitor and such was disabled just for security

>>162882323
Yes, but it's incredibly rare.

>>162882312
>be miner
>other miner is rev head
>I know what I must do
>mine until I find gibtonite
>0 seconds left
>bring it into the station and blow it up at HOP desk
>captain caught in explosion
>finish him off

My only real successful explosion and revving

>>162882357
What are my chances, anon?

>>162882312
meet me at the research station dorms at 12:40 i'll teach you how to make the most low effort 7 dev

>>162882589
I wish but I'm going to bed, sorry

>>162882489
I've been playing for more than a year and I think I've gotten Sec traitor two or three times, ever.

HE DID IT AGAIN
CLUSTER'S GONNA FREAK

>>162883170
Who did what again

>>162883279
https://github.com/d3athrow/vgstation13/pulls

>>162883279
Celt spamming bugfix PRs that he didn't do himself

>>162883279
TURN ON GITHUB RIGHT FUCKING NOW

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>>162883441
THEY'RE ACTUALLY GONNA DO IT

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>>162878684
>Honky the snowclown
holy shit this is dope

>spawn alium larvae fixed
yes
YESSS

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>88 open PRs

>celt is gonna reach the 100 bugs milestone
>but no one will accept it because he got someone else to fix the bugs for him
he shoulda just not made promises he can't keep.

>>162884381
t. cluster scared to give up his adminship

>>162884482
Kick them both until they agree to bury the hatchet and stop being drama queens.

>>162884482
nah, not cluster, sometime tired of celt getting away with all the bullshit he's done lately

>>162876132
Its not a fat fetish' its inflation. Its worse.


>>162882062
I only make fusion smoke grenades packed with pure fun.

Chloral Hydrate, Space Drugs, Mindbreaker Toxin, Impedrezene , Lexorin.

>all the waifushit lately
>husbandoshit rearing it's ugly head
>all these fags coming out of the woodwork
jesus christ reign in the overt sexuality bullshit, i come here for wacky cartoon in space and funtimes with cool spessmen, not "romance" from caricatures of 'females', crossdressers and outright gayness, there's vore and eros for that shit m8s
>inb4 ebin /pol/posters with ebin forgettable vice president memes
go away /pol/ just gonna say it right now

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>Mommis plasmaflood and only a E20 throwing ling and the mommis are alive before ERT.

>>162885205
>just playing the game and having fun
>the thought of becoming a waifu for someone someday warms my heart.

>>162885354
REMOVE

>>162885270
MoMMi emagging should be removed, or alternatively, admins should crack down harder on shitter crab players (you know who you are) who start scuttling around or just standing still near known tators waiting to get emagged.

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>>162885205
>be from /pol/
>be a quiet waifu minding my own business
>tfw one husbando away from becoming a full blown degenerate

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>Traitor
>Kill Geneticist
>Oh god, i'll probably have to kill him at the end of the round.
>Start making Ripley
>Hear door buzzing
>Its the geneticist
>Heart Racing
>Y.y.yy.ah?
>Can I get a robot arm?
>Su.s.s.sure
>Start making robot arm
>Run into corner
>Buy para pen
>Heres yy.y.our robot arm
>Stab with para pen
>Drag over to robo surgery.
>Rip out his brain, and start building parts for a mommi
>He never accepts being placed in a mommi
>Miner comes in
>Uhhh whats that
>Points to body
>Oh he wants to become a mommi!
>Oh ok!
>Give miner Ripley
>Store brain in backpack.
>Try to put it in a mommi a few more times.
>Build Ody
>Want to test offensive capabiliteis of Ody
>Scoop random assitant into sleeper
>Inject Polynitiric Acid
>Its shit, but still hurts him quite a bit
>Install jetpack on Ody
>Go into space
>Dump body
>Find another body on the roid, and bring it back with a miner i ran into
>Come back
>Give the mech to paramedic
>Build Gygax
>Posibrain pings
>Turn it into a mommi and flash it right away
>Dump polynitric acid on brain from Geneticist
>Emag it
>Finish Gygax
>Blow up Exosuite computer
>Kill RD
>See another mommi building some sort of launcher
>Run after it
>Flash it while its working on something
>Emag it
>Tell both mommis to get the shuttle called
>Kill a few people
>Ling Librarian (maybe some one else?) tosses e20s or something into medbay
>Plasma starts flooding everywhere
>Gygax can't open the firelocks
>Have to get out and manually crowbar them
>Only works 1/4 of the time
>Get to comms console to call shuttle
>Emag doesnt work
>Sparks
>Plasma ignite
>Tons of pressure
>Get zas'd and die a tile away from my mech

>>162884603
>gays
>stop being dramawhores

>>162884605
why do you even care? he got help on fixing a bunch of bugs.

i cannot fathom why this is such a big deal to you.

>>162868353
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nX9sBv5_mQM

>>162885842
>>Get to comms console to call shuttle
>>Emag doesnt work
>>Sparks
>>Plasma ignite
>>Tons of pressure
>>Get zas'd and die a tile away from my mech
WHAT A RIDE

Also i'm glad we've all learned a valuable lesson about giving mommis vague orders.

>>162886045
It's drama. That's what the thread is here for, to stir up needless, meaningless drama, and when there is no drama, the thread will make some. This place is the place to make mountains out of molehills.
Don't take the thread seriously, because it's literally 99% shitposting.

>>162886045
Because people want to hate him because memes

>>162886151
I'm not, believe me I'm not, but this is so thin that I have to ask.

There has to be a genuine backbone. This feels so fucking forced that it has me questioning what people on the other side of posts do with their lives.

>>162886276
Probably kicking up drama in real life, too, if I had to take a gander.
Well, either that or these people have so little in their lives that they think space atmos waifu simulator actually matters, and that things that happen in it are at all important to their lives. Take your pick, really.

>>162886045
because he didn't get help, he took credit for something someone else did so he could achieve a goal he set for himself.
After posting he would fix 100 bugs himself by the end of the year, everyone laughed at him, and people made bets with him, which he and they agreed to keep if he didn't do it. And now he's cheating towards that goal.
https://github.com/d3athrow/vgstation13/issues/11665

>>162886425
I've never seen anybody project so hard with just anonymous funposts to go by. Good job

>>162886507
Anon, are you sure you aren't projecting people projecting to keep your worries out of your mind? I know that's what I'd do, projecting projecting onto other people accusing them of projection.

>>162886462
he's not taking credit for it as anything more than a joke, just like how your post is a joke.

>>162886569
No I'm not

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I regret asking.

>>162886625
Well I know I'm not projecting my projection onto other people's projection, so either someone here is projecting projection onto projection of projection, or else there's no projection and you should stop taking shitposting so seriously.

>>162886583
A joke? You clearly don't know a thing about Celt

>>162886745
Read bauds' post about it

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>>162882589
>Follow the wiki
>Got to make like 5 bombs
>Each one blew hard enough to wipe departments off the map

>>162886797
Read kammers. If the wanted to do what Bauds is saying they should have made a new goal for it, instead of piggybacking off the goal he set himself that had consequences

>>162886989
>consequences
There are no consequences. There will be no consequences. Even if Celt did it legitimately, zealot would not have resigned, just like he unbanned himself after he said "if trump wins permaban me". It's all tongue in cheek and meaningless, despite what you want to think.
Bugs are getting fixed. Celebrate the good things in life sometimes, anon.

>>162886989
lol come on dude it's just a joke man haha don't worry about me never fulfilling literally anything that I have ever laid out as a plan dude come on just jokes man haha

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>tfw becoming more rude
>assume people are trying to fuck with me
>call them idiots, and assume the worst about them

HOW DO I STOP MYSELF FROM GETTING ANGRY AT CHEMISTS WHO DISPENSE SULFURIC ACID IN 2U PILLS, AND PEOPLE WHO DON'T KNOW HOW TO USE BASIC EQUIPMENT?

>>162887147
>HOW DO I STOP MYSELF FROM GETTING ANGRY AT CHEMISTS WHO DISPENSE SULFURIC ACID IN 2U PILLS
You get your acid from the research outpost.

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>>162884381

>>162885270
>get killed by mommi since it chloraled me before I flashed it
>revive, head to get a borer so I can get antitox for the plasma
>use Avada's TCs to buy a gun and then go to xenobio for a borer
>by the time I'm getting more shit and nonplasma boots from the armory the death squad is here\


should just tossed an E20 when the first red mommi was just standing in the crowd around the holodeck.

>admins should crack down harder on shitter crab players (you know who you are) who start scuttling around or just standing still near known tators waiting to get emagged.

probably not gonna happen since you can't know whether the mommi was blatantly asking for it or if it got surprised or hit by flash powder or whatever unless you stalk the players who get emagged on a regular basis and I doubt any of them would do that

how do you get people into the game? My boyfriend is a pleb and I wanna show him my favorite games. I wouldn't meta game with him because that's fagtier

>>162888586
I got my friend into it by telling him to play Assistant and having him ask me any questions that he wanted, while I wasn't playing. So he could ask "what does it mean when it says my head hurts" and I'd answer it. He had watched Mandalore's video and had a basic idea, but observing and playing was more valuable.
Then other times we'd agree to go as the same job just so I could teach him things, but with absolutely no metacomms, just in-character so he could say "hey I'm new could you teach me?" without it being some random person.

>>162888586
yeah >>162888739 has a good premise
just dont be playing (on the same server) when he is so you can answer questions
You can exchange information that way safely so long as nobody else in game can get a hold of it
Just dont use shit like a streaming website or teamviewer since that can make bad habits

>>162888586
>thats fagtier
>is a fag
I don't know what you want me to take away from this.

Buy me an otaku enabler.

http://www.digitaltrends.com/home/gatebox-azuma-hikari-virtual-assistant-news/

>>162889063
I like dudes but I dislike flamboyant acts like gay pride and shit

>>162888586
Bring him in for a round.
Make sure to ahelp and explicitly tell the admins that you and he are friends and that you're showing him the ropes.
Help him learn how to play via IC chat or LOOC only.

>most of the bugs Celt has fixed so far were caused by his shitty planes code in the first place and should have been fixed fucking five months ago when they were reported
>he expects people to congratulate him for fixing them now

I hope Celt never comes back after he leaves in January.

>>162889473

gj celt

what's new in the sec world
Haven't played since insta lingvalid shanks were added

>>162890346
Knife boots and shitty pistols

>>162890346
HoS gets a Lawgiver in his locker on every station now.

>>162890442
Nice shitty pistols
Shotguns goat anyways
>>162890467
I'm guessing crew (sec) major victory every round now?
You have to be a retard to lose with that thing

>>162890646
>You have to be a retard to lose with that thing
Bear in mind that it no longer has gyrojet rounds, instead firing ricocheting bullets.
Also it has less stun shots than a taser and you can only change firing mode via voice command, which would be a little difficult in the middle of combat.

>>162890784
>not having voice command macros

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god damn this round has me raging

>>162890784
>Not using whatever setting you have to shoot your opponent into submission and then looming over their stunned bodies as you dramatically change the ammo.

>"Rapid fire."

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THE CULTIST CLOWN DID NOTHING BUT THROW TRASH THE ENTIRE ROUND

Sorry guys, first time antag and I got caught teleporting back to my rune.

>>162892721
You would have got released if you didn't cult armor up. The tree-sec wouldn't have let me kill you otherwise.

>>162892762
I was half paying attention to that conversation as I tried to wiggle my way out of that cell. Just panicked when I couldn't teleport and went for a cult armor. Also huge shoutout to tree-sec for the amusing RP.

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>Being the HoS

God damnit I wanted to shoot myself every time someone showed up to the brig
I won't roll with that again, and thank the rest of sec for doing that much better than I was.

>>162892698
>clown starts throwing trash
>janitor drives up
>instantly suicides

>>162892925
You did fine. Great work!

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>Ordered weapons and armor
>Turns out I couldn't open them
>They all disappeared like ten minutes later
>Made flamethrowers with the autolathe
>Ineffective because I didn't know that I would need separate fuel tanks
>In the end it was my trusty crowbar that took down the fleeing cultist, just like all the facehuggers
Fuck real weapons, become the Freeman

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>cover a hallway in trash
>janitor takes one look at it and snaps his own neck

>>162893031
Thanks sec buddy, those have to be some of the most fun but stressing jobs available
I wasn't prepared for any of that!

>5 shuttle survivors
If you're going to do the lolibombshuttlesorandumb thing, could you at least time it properly?

>>162893265
Smele was legit late as fuck that time.

>>162893265
>waited for ten seconds after the shuttle dock
>people are already Ick-ocking and shooting their guns
Yeah ok won't happen again, sorry.

>>162885596
>not just killing any mommi on sight regardless of eye color

>>162893043
I bet this loser doesn't even play Viscera Cleanup Detail in his free time.

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>tfw you get complemented and hugged for doing a good job

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>>162896334
>get borged
>get lots of head pats

>>162894003
I remember a time like one or two years ago when you were getting flamed for killing red eyed mommis, they'd ahelp and stuff. That was retarded.

>>162876857

Under what circumstance do you need to rapidly change mech weapon anon

>>162896637
AC to drill.

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>>162896637
>he doesn't 360 weapon swap noscope shitters

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>>162896427

>>162892925
The only time I've ever been banned from a ss13 server I harmbatoned an assistant to death as HoS after he ran into the brig behind the Warden and pushed him over.

HoS is tough.

>>162896662

you could just keep shooting them, it's not like you have limited reloads

>>162897529
Gotta kill fast, menu too slow.

>>162873286
>read the engineering guide
>they use a shard to heat up the TEG's hot loop
THE ABSOLUTE MADMEN
will try to reproduce later

I imagine Vox as sounding like Gilbert Gottfried but annoying and even more shrill.

>>162898489
Fuck I just realised I did too

>>162898489
dianos sound like peppa pig to me

>>162897937
Make a small cooling loop with H/E in space filled with n2 with a scrubber + injector inside the SME chamber. Make a AAC script to check the when the temperature is over the damaging temperature: if yes turn scrubber off and inject cold N2 and if not turn injector off and scrubber on and scrub only n2.

It still sounds instable as fuck and a single power off event will literally fuck your shit

>>162873286
>Roll clown
>The server's the same as any other
>There's the usual asshole with all the guns
>Shield in one hand, riot gear on
>I think he's a fucking botanist or something
>Forces me to striptease at gunpoint, shoots me in the head with a m1911 'accidentally'
>Look at the navigation console
>My brain can't comprehend the levels of fuck going on and I crash
>Reconnect a second before the other botanist tries to toss me in the gibber
>Shuttle has to be called because nobody can set up power, meanwhile this asshole who has all access just sits at the piano
>Goes on a killing frenzy with all his guns when the shuttle docks

It's too late, it's already a circlejerk

>>162899767
Adult dionas are in reality just a bunch of nymphs cobbled together in humanoid form.

>>162900160
>2525
>be a spacemen
>can't setup power, even from emergency sources like the PACMAN
What the fuck are they teaching these kids in School Station 5?

>>162899767
There was a diona today who kept saying yee haw and for some reason I started reading his messages in Homer Simpsons voice

>>162884381
To be fair, as he said he'd do them himself?

If he only promised 100 bug fixes, that wording is generic enough that it doesn't matter if someone else did it.

>>162898489
>not roman belic

>>162900471
>Chikitiwa, my cousin! Do you want to go bowling?

>put every role to low
>either a captain or antag every round

>be captain
>everyone fears you and respects you weirdly or runs away
>bunch of shitters constantly needing your help

captain should be a civ job, it's truely one of the worst jobs on the station

>>162901405
If you set head roles to anything you're way more likely to get them, it prioritizes them over other roles.
Also I think special roles are still broken for a lot of people, they have to set them every round and probably forget.

>>162901726
Sadly for me I have CMO on low and Geneticist/Virologist on medium.

Always get G/V. Never CMO.

>>162901726
Do not click submit in the special prefs or it'll reset them, just set your prefs and save your slot

>>162899767
I always imagined dionas talking very slowly with a deep voice and greys being the opposite with fast speaking and higher pitched voices.
All skeletons sound like skeletor.

>play spessmens
>regret it

How hard would be to port pAI drone form? Yes, i'm another guy who wants to start coding with non-simple projects

Why do my antag roles reset ?

>>162902637
What about Diona nymphs? Surely they don't have deep voices

>>162902939
Probably pretty fuckin hard if you don't know how to code man. Start realistic. Start small.

>>162903201
green doggo do a bark

Do you like me? Should I keep playing or should I quit?

>>162903313
just b urself

>>162903313
I got hazed for months when I started. I stuck with it and now I'm over two years here.

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>>162903313
I'll always like you if you just be yourself

>>162903313
Who r u

>>162879574
RD's job is to be the administrator of science. Unlike other heads whom go make their subjects do their jobs, your job is to make sure your subjects don't get carried away doing their jobs.
Saying you were distracted doing xenobio is no excuse, your job isn't to be a scientist, it's to keep an eye on the scientist, and you failed.
All the deaths due to the bombs in that round is as much your fault as the antags.

You're a horrible RD

>>162902939
>i'm another guy who wants to start coding with non-simple projects
How about waiting until your second PR to do a port? Do something really fucking small for your first.

My first PR was potato salad.

>>162905516
I am thinking about making my first PR to add Salt to pAI's food or chem dispenser

Why so slow?

>>162882489
The same as getting autotraitor

>>162907113
A question your parents have asked since your birth. Owned.

>>162901906
That is because I have CMO on medium ;^)))

DOG FUCKER MAJESTIC_MASTODON IS BACK

>>162905267
>It's the RD's fault the clown made four plasma bombs in the 60 seconds the toxins guy stepped out to do work on the cloner medbay
Solid logic, champ,
ricky is one of the few heads who actually does his job. eat a dick

>>162909379
t. the sticky man of third person compliments

Why isn't the QM considers a head?

>>162909718
I like him more as xenobiologist but i he indeed does his job

>>162909898
slimefucker

>>162909898
>i he
nice

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>>162909718
Not me, but I'm in the thread.

>I empty my .357 magnum into the HoS' head
>Almost get her, but Borer + Armored Cap 2strong
>Sec Officer empties a .45 into her head, armored cap blocks most of it
>All this for them to get Parapen + C4

Rin 'Goddamnit not the face again' Fukuimoto

I would've tazed and emptied my revolver into you but I figured I'd give you fun with your lawgiver since you mentioned wanting a gunfight.

>>162909859
Because he's not.

>Get harassed and threatened by the Xenobiologist, Vladimir
>Security arrests me

I, Mateo Mitchell, did my best.

>>162909859
He is the King of Cargonia, he is a head, in a way.

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I'M THE TRASH MAN

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>Like the game, head of security is legitimately fun
>Can only play one round unless I burn out my feeling to play it
>Play any other job, do moderately decent but don't like the high effort low reward result of it

>>162910535
HoS armor is OP, you need tasers, not guns.
3-4 .357 decapitate otherwise

>>162910575
By the way, Not rin. I practically play as "Deputy" in every med-population round because low is just boring as shit and high is a clusterfuck.

>>162910541
you dumbfuck

>tfw you dont have a green vulture fursona
feels good

>>162910729
>Do the job you ask of me instead of fucking off and doing something else
>Still get bullied
;_;

>>162910567
>QM is a head

when will this mem die

>>162910807
>tfw a human is your spirit animal

>>162910961
QM is a head in the same way the warden is a head, in that they can sort of direct their department but have no actual authority

This is my first time cult, how do I translate the tome?

>>162911210
Please be real

>>162911210
Go to adminwho and see if kavalax is on, he can help you the most, but if not other admins can help. Also if this is about the current round, this is ic in ooc and bannable. I recommend you delete your post before others notice.
Not going to directly say about your post so it don't ic ooc if you do delete your post.

>>162911210
help im dead in maint.

HELP DORMS

>>162912042
Thanks, now I know my target is dead in a locker down the telesci maint.

Guys the chef just attacked me with a knife what should i do

hop to desk

:g i just absorbed the captain come get free all access

I'm going to marry Rin!

IT'S CULT AI CALL IT

>>162912289
Good! That leaves Iris to me!

>>162912532
Do you want to have a double wedding? It'll be cute!

>>162912042
>leave welderbomb inside dorms 2
>get a voice change
>scream "HELP DORMS X IS ABSORBING ME" with waifu's voice
>BOOM 7 atoseconds later

>PJB not merging or reviewing any bugfixes because "lol if I don't merge them before the 19th they don't count!"
What the fuck is wrong with this guy?

>>162912792
Where did he say this?

Its a "Xenos are people" because the captain said so episode.

>>162912891
Right after he said "i'm just gonna close all the bugfixes not made by celt"
https://github.com/d3athrow/vgstation13/issues/11665

>>162912989
>its an "ignore the comdom and get 'dem valids" episode
Make your own fun

>>162912289
Which one?

>>162913398
The cute one! ;3

>>162913040
Get pomf in the phone, closing bugfixes or simply refusing to merge them for no reason is abuse of flags

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>check back thread after 5 months
>still waifushitters
lol get a life fags

Just came back after two years, is it just me or are ADCs fucking useless now?

>>162913947
>Come back after 1 decade
>You're still running BYOND
Lol when are you faggots gonna move to a bette engine

Exadv1 here, nice server losers you've all evolved into true bustas at this point

>>162913947
>he thinks its serious
pretty sure people do it to rile up autists like you

>>162914092
>>/lolg/

>>162914303
told u i was hrdc0r

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> even a virus with four beneficial symptoms only transmissible by blood gives you a fever that will very slowly kill you by overheating

>>162914390
Oh shit, now people know our shitty userbase is made by LoL players

>>162914359
When I played I always got my kicks robusting waifufags as sec

Or genociding the station as antag

>tfw split my nail and it hurts to type
:(

>>162914725
just use tape

>>162914564
ow the edge

>>162914769
I bandaided it up but any pressure on my finger stings like a bitch.
Now I won't be as robust and everyone will kick my ass.

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>>162879574
Dont worry anon, you were one of the best RD along with that plasma man guy. Its our god forsaken right to make huge bombs and be kind with them.

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>>162914564
>mfw I post waifushit just for the guaranteed (you)s

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>return to space tribe after 1000 moons
>tribesmen still scribble about women

>>162915021
>and be kind with them.
THE CLOWN DID THIS: >>162868303

And he did it because half the station enabled him.

>>162915154
>tribesmen rather rub genital on crayon drawing of woman than go get real woman
No make sense booga

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>>162915184
Thats because clown=/=Science
All ''kind'' clowns are litterly pogo the clown and should be spaced on sight and searched for killing husbando's. Honk is a codeword for ''i will rape and murder you at the first maintance shaft kiddo'', any clown who isnt being a visible mean man with lube is a cold hearted gay fetish killer.

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BORG STATION 13

All right faggots give me new snack ideas based on our belovedpfft static namers so we can actually craft our lore for the next generation of spacemen shittalk about!

Can't pin the rin

>>162916342
Dream Cream Puffs

>>162916342
Waifu special


2 faggots
15 units of welder fuel

>>162916342
referencing players is pretty much haram and the only references in there are because someone is too lazy to remove them

>>162916782
hah