Spessmen on a Spess Station - /ss13g/

Railing rail

No shitposting, waifuposters.

I WANT A VOX GF NOW

Protip
Lube is ridiculously unfair, and you should use it any chance you get.

File: Jesus Katarn.jpg (62KB, 540x578px) Image search: [Google]

62KB, 540x578px

>>128962985

File: Space Wizards.gif (2MB, 480x480px) Image search: [Google]

2MB, 480x480px

First for space wizzards

RAIL'S VAGINA

>>128963383
is valid

What do you need to send a fax? Does it take IAA access?
If I team up with the Clown to send a fake fax to Centcomm requesting mandatory laser tag due to all-low station morale, how would it likely end up?

>"Feature Freeze 2016 Best day of my life"
>354 Issues

Oh fuck

>>128964305
It's just gonna last about 3 weeks before people give up, and the next feature freeze will come at 1250 open issues.

>>128964305
REMOVE SOOD

>>128963282
> protip
no

Igor, why were you stealing my damn locker. It's liek you and the plasmaman were ken dolls, wouldn't ask shit and just niggered around.

>People that play overly seriously

what is this unfun shit

>>128965241
NO I HAVE TO BREAK INTO THE ARMORY AND TAKE EVERYTHING SO I CAN KILL SEC. THEN THE THREAD WILL CALL ME ROBUST

>>128965241
Overly serious in what way?

>>128965435
No I mean like an HoP saying no maint access for you because etc etc

>>128965543
I understand that. One time as a xenobiologist I needed maint access to get to my lab because the main science hall was filled with plasma. He was all "No. Get atmos to clear it out" Oh sure. Let me wait around for one atmos tech to consider his job while my slimes turn rabid and ruin the lab

>>128965543
And that's when someone's office gets IED'd, his APC shorted, and his console taken. Bonus points if you slip and steal his egun and ID before sec arrives.

>>128965779
Your biosuit protects from plasma, use locker room portable air scrubbers

Brave the elements and chill your N2O canisters from tox storage. Chuck a bag of 7 one-tank bombs into his office, close the door and signal it. He'll be sleeping until someones gives a fuck about him

>>128965897
>ZOMG HOP GIB ACCESS
>no
>FUCKING POWERGAYMER HOP REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
>*murders hop as nonantag*

>>128966375
>sleeping some guy
>murder
You funny guy, you

>>128966375
>Sleep him
>Murder

>>128966458
>>128966586
>grayshirts literally too stupid to tell numbers apart

>>128966375
>Office IED = murder
Nice meme.

>Fixed stackable items (metal rods, floortiles etc) only giving one item's worth of materials when recycled at an Autolathe

since when do autolathes have recycle ability?

>botanist C4's someone
>thinks their objective is done
>leaves their head on the goddamn ground
>target gets transplanted into a monkey man
>nobody gets told
>botanist thinks they're still dead
>shuttle arrives
>"psssh.. nuthin personnel kids.. i had to kill ya... just business" in comms

oh my sides

File: 1437602920470.jpg (26KB, 335x430px) Image search: [Google]

26KB, 335x430px

>tg
>ghost
>witness 2 liggers emoting at one another and whispering cringeworthy shit in a 3 by 1 enclosed, walled off space in maint
>call everyone to laugh
>entire deadchat teleports to me
>admin spawns in as a goliath alongside hitting one with admin artillery
>kills the other after a small chase in the middle of the hallway
>SAFE SEX GOLIATH says "REMEMBER KIDS"
>SAFE SEX GOLIATH says "STAY SAFE, UNLIKE THESE LIGGERS"

>>128969305
At least 2 years

>>128969305
Since forever. As a janitor I'd recycle broken lights on it.

>>128970153
Whats a ligger?

>>128972216
Lizard + Nigger

Xenoarch is comfy and puts me in a roleplay mood but I feel like everyone I could meet on asteroid is just there for murder

How do I code?
How do I make good code?
I want to help /vg/.

>>128972660
Half the things that aren't outright griff are roleplay oriented.
Just look at good/bad feeling large artifacts and the description for alien kitchenware flavor text saying "you wonder how they ate with this"

Is there any way to avoid the lag for when admins start streaming music?

>>128972660
Yup, Take a moment to do a little research and print a rapid syringe gun and a stun revolver. Load 4 chlorals in it. Make 100u sleep tox in the outpost and put the 2 pills in your box. Anyone comes in, get distance, if they pursue, sleep em. If they shoot at you, shoot back. If you see them on the roid, it's a ling/parapenner. Just kill them and dig through their shit. You can turn on your reagent scanner and stick them if you want to check their pens.

>>128972660
The asteroid is the Wild West IN SPACE.
Cargo are frontiersmen, cowboys and miners, risking it all and getting in danger for an honest day's pay.
Vox are Mexicans, weird angry short people stealing things and yelling at everyone in a foreign tongue.
Then there's bandits showing up using its distance from civilization to run from the law and murder without remorse.
Along with that are the Cultists, the Mormons, creepy religious folk, wanting to spread the good word of Nar-Siesus Christ and the Latter Day Shades.
And there you are in the middle of all that chaos and lawlessness looting ancient Indian burial grounds.

>>128974326
I thought hardsuits block syringe guns.

>pAI wants me to hatch a borer
>Agree since it's slow
>Set up IED, blow open borer crate
>HOP wanders into cargo
>Pokerface
>He gives me the champ belt and asks for a lazarus injector, get him one
>Go hatch borer in the incinerator

Comfy round

Would you put your life on the line for a Space Bear?
How far would you go for vengeance?

>>128975881
It's like a 50/50 thing

>Get double agent
>Don't want to fight anymore after last shift
>Go to the acting captain and tell her im a double agent and i dont want to fight anymore
>Try to emag the borg to make him entertain me and the rest of medbay while they were getting high
>Admins start playing music so I lag the fuck out because straya
>AI blows the borg because why not
>Feel defeated
>Find the guy I was meant to assassinate and try to tell him I don't want to fight
>He spergs out and runs deep inside the science block
>Walk in to try and talk with him
>He pens me and shoots my face off
>Grabs my body and puts in a locker before welding it
>Takes it to the mining station
>Unwelds it and uses my clever to hack my body endlessly before taking my emag
>A-at least i turned my suit censors up
>Everyone in the radio talks about how i probably just killed myself
>AI calls for a man hunt on me for no raisin

T-thanks for caring at least carrie.

>>128976460
Sorry Chef.

>Show up and mine some shit
>Try to figure out how to do RnD with no access
>MoMMI gets shit done because that is what pingcrabs do
>Go near a grey and suddenly get sick
>hang out with the CMO and helpful borg while they make a cure
>Go back to RnD to make a mess of Medical items to thank them for curing the station
>Get science access from the HoP that arrived
>Print out some ARGs and head off to the roid.
>Kill monsters, make fat cash, find the motherload
>Shuttle is called and I taunt the xenobiologist for running a hazard of a lab
>Hudson attacks his owner on the shuttle.
>Sadly murder Hudson
>See as the HoP Jumps out the window of the shuttle with the CMO
>Ride the shuttle to safety
>SMELELELELELELE nut job runs in and stuns me then comes back to kill me
>Medical borg saves me and I lase the dudes face off
>Chill with the borg after.

Deadpop comfy on Meta isn't that bad it seems

Why is there a fucking SJW server? What is this?
I avoided the Yogstation, because it sounds like ''Yogscast'' the guys who make minecraft videos for kids.
My favorite server went down so I checked out the Yogshit.
Immediately they force you to read their dogshit rules, you can't play fun jobs unless you've been on the server for months and they get anal over the smallest shit.
Some guy tried to kill me, so I hid in the brig and wrote ''GAY NIGA'' on the floor to taunt him as mimes usually do.
The admin immediately PMs me asking what I am doing and going on about how I am a ''bigot'' or some shit. Got a permament ban.
Why do SJW ruin everything?

>>128977062
What did you respond to the admin?

>>128976441
Is there anyone left in lowpop that still tryhards as HoP/cap/sec?

>>128977062
>Why do SJW ruin everything?
Donald Trump is the only way to make the world a little bit less tumblr and a little more #chan.

>>128977062
>Why is there an X server?
Because there is no barrier to entry for creating a server

>>128977062
>My favorite server went down
What was it?

>>128977215
Dunno but they showed up immediately after I blew the crate so I assumed they heard a small boom and zipped over to see if I was popping crates

>>128977145
Said that they shouldn't be saying ''gay nigga'' because I happen to be one that I will not take insults from a privileged cis white male.

>>128977235
>a little less shit and a little more turd
Meme politics, not even once.

>>128977062
>Walk into someone's house
>Get up on their dinner table
>Shit in their bowl of mashed potatoes
>They throw you out
???

>>128977382
When I do this to Indian people they call me a bigot for not respecting their unique excretory culture

>>128977382
Here's a better analogy.
>join someone's server
>get into their brig
>write two words on the floor, neither of them insulting since gay is just homosexual and nigga is what niggers like me are allowed to say
>they permanently ban you
>if I ruined someone's game by killing them or blowing up the station I'd probably not even get banned
epic

>>128977235
>Has done nothing but pander and display crippling ignorance
Dunno what that anon was expecting breaking servers rules like that though

>>128977513
''Don't be a bigot'' isn't a rule. It means nothing. I wasn't being a bigot, the admin was being a bigot.
People really need to check the definition of the word.

Chaplain is an underrated job

File: WORST PAI EVER.png (16KB, 939x303px) Image search: [Google]

16KB, 939x303px

Post pAI's.

>>128978917
Fuck off, Zach

>>128977513
>Has done nothing but pander and display crippling ignorance

found the ignorant one

>>128979142
>>128977513
wew lads glad we sure are talking about spessmen and not totally off topic /pol/ presidential race discussions that aren't related to space in any way

File: Emperor Trump for WW3 Victory.jpg (35KB, 552x554px) Image search: [Google]

35KB, 552x554px

>>128979452
10 months can't come soon enough.

>>128979142
Fuck off to your containment board.

>>128979452
inb4 "spot the Bernie voter"

>>128979536
Unban me please rag.

>>128979569
That's not spaceman all politics whether you're voting left or right goes on >>>/pol/

>>128979536
Pls stop encouraging them

>>128979536
Ban kingston please rag.

Remember when Captain Trump deported all grayys and Vox and built a wall?
Haha funny and original gimmick

File: 1453086250411.jpg (26KB, 640x427px) Image search: [Google]

26KB, 640x427px

>secluded job
>the door opens

>>128981203
>ai core
>the door opens
HONK

>HoP almost kills the station thrice by adding "Crew aren't human, they're monkeys" laws
>That green thing that became captain until a cargo tech stole his stuff and spaced himself
>Neither the HoP or the cargo tech were antag

Holy shit

>>128981203
Cute parrot.

File: 1450831237762.png (134KB, 367x180px) Image search: [Google]

134KB, 367x180px

>>128981607
>set laws to spice up crew dialogue
>AI takes it as a chance to attempt murderbone
>set it with a clause to allow crew to participate and prevent any trouble at all
>no one does it and the AI doesn't listen to a direct order to not lethal turret someone
>add a clause to not harm the crew no matter what
>never once does the fun part of the laws come into play
>give up and change it to Asimov since AI doesn't want to be fun
>it immediately plasma floods part of the station and lights half of it on fire

>>128981884
AI banned when

>>128981947
In its defense, the burning was trying to rid the biomass off the station

>>128981203
>ERPing in viro
>hear airlock cycle

>>128981884
I tried to burn weird shit from spreading. i quarantined it and warned everyone

>>128981884
>trusting shittycons
>ever
Silicon players are horrible people who barely follow their laws and just want to play a powerful character.
80% of borgs going Marina and half of the ais going anime display and pedo hologram are enough red flags for their cancerous nature

>>128982027
I like silicons and being autistic about my laws and commands and it makes me mad when I see other borgs do shit wrong according to laws

>>128982150
>emag a Borg
>tell it to do something
>it doesn't want to
>tell it to do something else
>it keeps following me in the main hallways and loudly asking for more information and what he should do next
EVERY
FUCKING
TIME

>>128982325
>emag a borg
>tell it to be a bad doctor
>Begrudgingly follows orders
>tell it not to murder me
>plasma floods the shuttle and escapes alone
>borg was autotraitored mid-round

I swear i had the absolute worst luck when i played here.

>>128982750
>borg
>traitor
What? sillycones can only be malf.

>>128983301
That must not have been true when this happened, i think i still have the screenshot of the laws at round end.

File: 4eb6181009[1].png (26KB, 411x546px) Image search: [Google]

26KB, 411x546px

S O O N ?

>>128983559
NO
O

>>128983559
D O O M E D

>>128983508
Are you sure it wasn't a traitor since the start? Not sure borgs can be autotraitored.

>>128983821
Yup that was it.

I remember the borg player explaining it to me in ooc at round end and i was embarrased as fuck because i ahelped it when they plasma burned me

>get a crush on someone's character
Fuck me

File: 1351336276734.jpg (98KB, 400x400px) Image search: [Google]

98KB, 400x400px

>tfw will be unbanned in a few minutes after I spaced the chef yesterday because it was funny
I'm coming for you, Grubber

>>128984215
Tell them how you feel, Anon!

>>128984215
Anon, you don't have a crush on someone's character.

You have a crush on them

>>128984215

Do put us in the loop, senpai.

>get a crush on cute 2d spessmen aliens
truly this is the worst feel

>>128984592
>get a crush on someone
>they reciprocate
>dont act on it
Now I'm a cuck. Dont go down my path

>>128984215
>>128984592

Just ERP already.

>>128984592
Fuck off Railfag, this is the other anon's show.

>>128984725
I'm only into xeno heresy, sorry to confuse you, m8.

>>128983559
its dead or i hope not.
i wish he would already relase fucking build and started server.

Should advanced docility potion work on all mobs, for true Xeno pet action?

It would also be an interesting way to counter some antags.

>>128985031
docility potion should work on adult slimes. advanced docility potion should pull a ghost into the mob, and work on any critter.

>>128984745
But my crush is also Rail...
I need to give her a human body once I'm antag.

File: bestgif.gif (1MB, 858x570px) Image search: [Google]

1MB, 858x570px

>>128984232
>tfw you will be banned for metagrudging the moment you do something stupid
>tfw you'll inevitably do something stupid

>>128985407
gas yourself, untermench

>>128985407
Fuck off, Railfag. Find a REAL waifu.

>>128985523
>implying I will
I was kidding when I posted that

>>128985407
>I need to give her a human body once I'm antag

That would be great, the thread would lose their shit if someone posted a screenshot of her in a human body as she shot out of the cloner naked.

>>128985363

So, it wouldn't work on mobs that are already player-controlled.

I was thinking that it would have to be able to remove their more dangerous powers, or even their ability to attack. It is a domestication serum, after all.

For instance, a Xenomorph would no longer be able to spit acid, spread weeds, evolve, or talk using :a, and would no longer have any objectives, but would gain the ability to speak English.

>tfw no qt vox gf to spess with

>>128985617
>>128985748
Jelly, not even the actual railfag.

I have a crush on Rambling Maniac!

>>128986000
Nice vox trips.

>>128985928
That's a good idea, but maybe it should add a few abilities as well? It's kind of shitty to remove their only good abilites and give them nothing in return.

Maybe make them more dexterous so they can use their hands, or even just let them wear clothes and do stuff normal crew members do.

i want to have to ask a xenomorph for all access one day.

>enter the station
>step out of office to unlock a box for cargo
>get hit with something that turns us all into vibrating clowns with the color screen
>amazed I get to the shuttle control room
>plasma floods the shuttle
>safe behind door
>ride back to the station on the floor, twitching, unable to stand up

How do you move the telepad from telescience?

>>128986921
Unwrench it.

>>128983821
I got autotraitor borg after the emag, and the traitor law 0 overwrote the emag law 0. Funny how that worked out.

>>128986964
you can't

>>128987029
Unweld it.

>>128987065
you can't move it at all, numbnuts
it's not supposed to move

>>128988168
AI IS MALF GUYS TIME FOR A TRIAL

File: 1451954309102.jpg (43KB, 680x680px) Image search: [Google]

43KB, 680x680px

>>128988448
ADMINPM: WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING? THAT HORROR-FORM LING NEEDS A FUCKING TRIAL

File: stocking up.png (283KB, 456x522px) Image search: [Google]

283KB, 456x522px

Screenshot from earlier today. I meant to post it right after the shift but I got called away.

Meta cargo is a good cargo bay for crate storage

>>128988575
I know you're joking but an admin actually tried to get me to do a trial for a ling who had horror formed and had died, reverting to human.

I gibbed the cunt and dared the admin to ban me, nothing happened.

>>128988720
What day? What was your name at the time? (Or your ckey)

I want to go back through the logs and read it, sounds like a funny story

Can someone fill me in on the slime bug?

>>128986921
You can't. It's a special snowflake machine that can't be built or moved.
Even if an admin were to move it with adminpowers, I'm not sure it'd cause Telescience to be able to teleport things to its new location.

>>128988905
>too lazy to get banvalids
fuck off!

>>128988905
Eat shit, scrape your own logs if you want to ban me, faggot.

>>128989408
>banvalids
>not banevalids

>>128989491
>>128989408
wew lads the hostility

File: 1359467510539.png (20KB, 413x481px) Image search: [Google]

20KB, 413x481px

https://soundcloud.com/aberrantkenosis/space-oddity-bike-horn-cover
I just found this
Happy trails spacemen

>>128964180
IAA can Fax, Cap can Fax dunno about the other heads but I assume so., though if you wanna be even more valid steal their stamps and stamp the paper with the HoS/Cap?HoPs stamps

>>128990724
>>128964180
All heads and IAA have fax access

File: I have lost control of my life.png (928KB, 960x720px) Image search: [Google]

928KB, 960x720px

>>128990631
;___;
Why won't the pain go away

Wizard, Malf, Changeling, Traitor, Auto Traitor, Raging Mages, Nuke Ops, Blob, and Vox Raiders are literally the worst round types.

>>128993298
And what do you like? Extended?

>>128964180
If it's me responding to the fax and no effort is put into the fax and I look over at you and you didn't even take the time to put on a suit (clown mask is fine) I'll likely inform the crew someone is sending bullshit faxes and needs to be dealt with.

If you do take your time and have a nice suit on I'll go along with it.

>>128993437

He obviously likes Meteors and Extended anon, because those are the only two good modes in this game

>>128993437
>>128993608

Why do people even like extended?
Do they just like the bans shitters get?

>>128994496
Because it gives me time to talk up the waifus in the bar

>>128994584
>implying the bar isn't welderbombed or set on fire every round during extended

File: oCLettW.png (6KB, 545x61px) Image search: [Google]

6KB, 545x61px

>taxi station
>give clown more community access
>tries to break into my office
>get shocked by the door, begin dying
>they get to me too late and I die
>clown probably has the gun I dropped
>clown stole my ID card
>defibbed back to life
>clown arrested
>get my gun back
>wear the clown's backpack
>clown used my ID to give himself all access
>stun him and make him an assistant
>throw away his clothes so he remembers he's an assistant now
>parrot repeats something I said to the clown

>later on some jackass named Big Earl goes on a rampage in security
>they call me in and I take him down
>won't reveal what he was trying to accomplish
>we take him to robotics
>everything goes wrong, no power in the taxi area
>end up going out the air lock and nearly die again
>get to robotics and we borg Big Earl AKA Frank McRib

>can't get any help for my breathing problems and coughing up blood in medical
>fucking chaos everywhere
>shuttle called
>clown tells me he was syndicate
>ship gets overrun by basilisks as we head home
>make it out alive

God damn I love being HoP

>>128994496
I like mining on extended, but that's about it

File: 1452835338468.png (2KB, 519x21px) Image search: [Google]

2KB, 519x21px

>>128994584

Honk!

>>128994807
>throw away his clothes so he remembers he's an assistant now
Did you take off his shoes, you monster?

>>128995431
absolutely, a clown is nothing without their shoes

File: logo19.png (7KB, 192x141px) Image search: [Google]

7KB, 192x141px

>>128994807
>basilisks
literally one.
There were 7-8 goliaths, a spider and holocarp, tho
Also, gave away clown was tator almost at round start

>>128993298
Blob and Vox Raiders are my favorite modes

I am glad we have so many diverse opinions

Need experienced scientist

Did killing a large slime always result in 2 rabid slimes or is that a bug?

>>128996012
The guy shooting around with the ion rifle on the shuttle was antag I hope, because he disabled my bag full of weapons that could have been used to kill all that shit.

>>128996990
Yes it always has that result.

>>128997282
Okay good, thanks

I promised you on Friday that I would do this Monday after I fixed my laptop screen

https://github.com/d3athrow/vgstation13/pull/7758

>>128996806
Malf, Changeling, Nuke Ops, Vox Raiders, and Blob are all top tier in my opinion

Traitor anything is meh tier but can be amazing depending on the player.

Wizard rounds are arguably the worst fucking round type, only saved by how short they are.

File: 1450355709042.png (461KB, 950x694px) Image search: [Google]

461KB, 950x694px

>>128998165
>gimmick traitors in a nutshell

>>128998165
Rev is up there with Wizard, but at least it's better since it's usually 5 minutes tops.

>>128998165
Agree with everything but
>Changeling
which is barely above wizard tier.

It's fun seeing the station that usually goes on killing each other unite against the bigger threat.

>>128998221
What's that supposed to be?

>>128998446
probably gas chamber

>>128998446
Traitor atmos tech set up a sudoku death puzzle where you had to solve it or be killed

Threw someone in and they suicide succumb
Threw in another person and they suicide succumb

File: bird hat 2.png (329KB, 3200x2135px) Image search: [Google]

329KB, 3200x2135px

>>128981203
I didn't give you permission to save that image

File: 1265780309957.gif (843KB, 213x183px) Image search: [Google]

843KB, 213x183px

>>128998521

>>128998857
The thread went bonkers at the time, I think it was just about a month ago now

>>128998949
How fucking lame of a human being would you have to be to suicide succumb in that situation?

>>128999009
If you want to metagrudge, one of the two people was Old Man MacGregor

File: 1448331830375.jpg (107KB, 1040x1055px) Image search: [Google]

107KB, 1040x1055px

>yfw trying to book someone as sec and an entourage of non sec members keep bumping into you and letting the prisoner go

>>128999212
Flash the prisoner over and over as you drag them to avoid this problem

>>128999212
Also, disarm intent.

>>128998165
>Traitor anything is meh tier but can be amazing depending on the player.

I've found my best traitor rounds are ones where I do two things: ignore objectives, and don't formulate master plans.
Firstly, going for greentext is dull and stifles your true potential and creativity as an antagonist.
Secondly, as a rule of thumb, to paraphrase Moltke the Elder: no plan survives contact with the enemy. This includes gimmicks like >>128998221, where he made a sudoku puzzle and the players refused to play it and flipped his shit shortly afterwards. Your plan means nothing if others balk it entirtely.
Make things up as you go. Wing it, think on your feet, proactively modify your behavior and change your game on the fly as the situation evolves. Be one step ahead, and don't fall one step behind forcing things.

File: Let me tell you why that's bullshit.jpg (17KB, 298x318px) Image search: [Google]

17KB, 298x318px

>>128977215
You have clearly never experienced a shitty waifu playing a head/sec role during deadpop.

>>128999535
So, what exactly do you do then, as antag?

>>128999742
>wanted to get some practice in as CMO during dedpop
>end up getting forced to take up Acting Captain
>try and coordinate shit around the station whilst getting medbay sorted
>no sec
>someone broke into the armory
>try and hunt them down
>power goes out, antag starts fucking around in engineering trying to get the crystal out of secure storage
>kills himself with rads
>the one person who had engineering access kicked it as well
>everywhere is dark, everyone is clamoring for my head
>call the shuttle so I don't get lynched
>get murdered by the second antag anyways after he starts eswording niggas left and right


captain is a hard, unappreciated role and i respect anyone who can do it the way it's meant to be done without just being an assistant with all access

File: birdhat-2.png (156KB, 3200x2135px) Image search: [Google]

156KB, 3200x2135px

>>128998758
I didn't ask for it

>>128993298
Meteors it is!

>>129000137
Barely anyone does it right, at least you were better than the one last night whom blew the secborg which was the only sec before running straight into newcops with the disk.

>>129000137
No no no my lad, I'm talking about a SHITTY WAIFU.
>be mechanic, only engineering guy in the entire station so I go to set up power
>try to make talk over the radio, literally the only person who responds is sawbones, truly believe it's just us two who are not braindead
>have to hack into CE's office to get a hardsuit because secure storage is closed
>after power is set and I go to tcomms and try learning scripting because it's so fucking ded
>Cap and HoS who I didn't even know existed, both terrible waifus, come in and start hounding me about why did I break into CE's office and what did I do with "the telecomms password"
>sincerely have no idea what this bitch is on about, she genuinely believes there's a telecomms password paper that spawns on the CE's desk (there isn't) and I'm sabotaging telecomms or something
>doesn't understand why an engineer would hack into the CE's office
>take my ID and drag me to interrogation, they're so terribly unrobust sawbones tailgates in and disarms them both, they literally can't get him out
>get thrown out without my ID and sucked off by unrelated vampire
>later this happens https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=omx9ChGKOq0
In another deadpop round I was perma'd because another shitty waifu thought I had emagged a borg (????????) and after finding no proof they said they couldn't let me go because "they couldn't prove I was not a syndie".

>tfw no doomstation

>>129000934
But I am a shitty husbando. Or was, anyways.

>>129000934
were you on meta?

>>129001118
Nope, both box

>>129001167
there is a messaging server key in the CE office on metaclub (that's the only one though)

>>129001203
That shit spawns in the RD's office in Box I believe, either way I don't think that's related to tcomms

>>129000952
its died, forgot about it.

>>129001330
it's semi related because on every map there is a message monitor in the tcoms chamber

it is in the RD office on box

File: 1443329741401.jpg (41KB, 1280x720px) Image search: [Google]

41KB, 1280x720px

>>128965435
Breaking into the armory to kill sec is fun, you dull paper pusher.

>>129001330
The password is the only way to monitor/interact with PDA monitoring. The paper is the only way to find it out.

File: clownling.png (365KB, 1920x1080px) Image search: [Google]

365KB, 1920x1080px

>Be clown ling
>Fuck around with everyone, use mimic voice to read WGW over comms as captain but forgot to hide my ID at first
>Chaplain farts on me, drops bible, I fart back
>Oops, RIB clown
>He makes a satanic ritual to revive me
>I set shit on fire, eventually husk myself on purpose
>Creep people out, hoard guns
>Kill the 2 people I need for genomes and my target
>CMO tries to revive my target, I shoot some lasers at him
>Go to escape pod while being very stupid
>GET STUCK
>Ask for help
>There's some asshole in the pod right next to me, he doesn't help. Fuck you man
>Decide to bite the bullet, weld the tank in the picture to escape
>End up in crit, shuttle goes away
>Turns out I stole the RCD instead of the RPD anyways

Whoopsies!

>>128998221
https://boards.fireden.net/vg/thread/125574021/#125663072
This is the post if anyone wants to read the original.

>>128999079
It was Old Man Henderson, actually.

>>129002157
Traitor and milf AIs can hack the messaging console for the key.

File: 1352241948499.gif (278KB, 480x270px) Image search: [Google]

278KB, 480x270px

>Clown gets stunned by the ED robot
>Walk over and fart on him
>Quickly try to wack him with my bible
>drop it
>He farts
>oh shit
>gets destroyed
>revive him because I felt guilty
>It was a ling
my sides
>>129002348
honk

>>129002348
Why didn't you just weld the wall

>>129002348
>GET STUCK
>WELDER AND CROWBAR IN INVENTORY
Wow, are you making this up? You can't be that bad

>>129002587
>>129002602

I.... huh...

Honk?

File: image.jpg (34KB, 288x499px) Image search: [Google]

34KB, 288x499px

>>129001503
>it died
I know
>forgot about it
Nope, i cant
shit was so fucking promising and than silince

>Random assistant
>Run around doing nothing, helping a few persons if needed, getting used to Spess after a long time of inactivity
>Captain is trying to hunt down the Cluwne, the son of the clown, after the clown gave birth to him
>Through a fucking lot of events I still can't fully understand, the clown dies horribly, but is brought back to life through a satanic ritual
>The cluwne is on the loose
>Captain is so shit he still didn't kill it
>Captain runs through the hallway firing his shotgun at a crowd trying to kill the clown
>Hits two people in the face with a shotgun
>We both die
>Get revived
>Continue my journey through the station
>Captain hits me with his laser again, after firing it once again at the crowd
>Don't die
>Tell him the third time will net him a dunking
>Get hit for the third time, this time is my fault so I pardon him

That captain man, that fucking captain. I'm still laughing.

>>129002348
Fun fact, for most items, if you ctrl+click them to start pulling them, and then click on an adjacent tile, you'll push the item onto that tile.
You could've pulled the welding tank and then clicked the shuttle tile above it to push it onto that tile without needing to be below the tank.

Post times you fucked up

>Be new
>Be scientist
>In the RD's office for some reason
>Suddenly xeno pops out the vent
>Start screaming for help over comms
>In massive fucking capitals
>About 12 times
>No response
>In crit
>Go to say something unrelated in OOC
>Change my mind
>OOC: HELP IN THE RD'S OFFICE XENOS
>bwoink
>bant

>>129003342
Can't do it in that configuration though.

>>129003342
You can't do that if you're surrounded by solid objects.

>>129003371
>be me
>want to start playing more than paramedic in med
>take nurse
>yred tells me to make cryo mix, ask him to teach me since i'm new
>guides me through everything, first step is plasma
>grind plasma
>take it out of the grinder
>accidentally spill it
>expect him to subject me to demotion via disposals
>he just goes and nabs xenobio's plasma, everything goes perfectly after more plasma is ground

that's the only time I've really fucked up royally that wasn't on a different serb

>>129003342
>>129003583
>>129003609
Which is strange, because I think it works that way on /tg/

File: 1451160974734.jpg (2MB, 3112x2338px) Image search: [Google]

2MB, 3112x2338px

HAH HAH HAH HAH HAH HAH
W O W
This whole server makes so much sense..
It ALL makes sense. I u n d e r s t a n d n o w.
c o m p l e t e l y

You're all Europeans. I watched your parliament elementary school debate about President Trump's humble and true opinions.
what a pathetic display that completely 100% reflective my own trial for being banned from this server. That debacle I watched on youtube with the rest of /pol/ really hit home. It was as if I was watching all of your *cough* multicultural faces on my mobile.

I mean, rarely have I ever made an audible sound when I watch things on the internet. I've been lurking these shitshores since the early 90's mother fucker. I eat my lunch when listening to distorted view. I jack off to sextastic teusday and far worse things in the past. But holy hell that vile and unprovoked attack on the innocent and brave Donald Trump made me actually stand up, take a shower to get the filth off of my soul, dry off, brush my teeth, and still let out a loud "WHO FUCKING CARES WHAT A BUNCH OF FUCKING IDIOTS." I went on to shit post the /pol/ thread about how pathetic (read: clucked) the caliphate of the united kingdom currently is.

>>129003734
Trump is shit.

Rand's the man.

>>129003734
>le funny nazi meme!

hahaha anon, I am a polman too! Fuck the jews, ammirite?

>>129003734
I literally am unable to finish reading your post. It bores me to death.

>>128974326
Its like your asking for every other miner to rip and tear through the outpost looking for xenoarch blood.

>>129003819
STAND WITH RAND
STAND WITH RAND
STAND WITH RAND

AUDIT THE FED

WHERE IN THE WORLD IS MARCO RUBIO

File: 1450155909558.gif (1MB, 680x849px) Image search: [Google]

1MB, 680x849px

>>129003819
>>129004061
I don't debate your opinion.
You're welcome to have them.

>>129003904
That's an example of exaggeration. Do you have an hominem for me next?

>>129003978
Stumped.

>>129003904
You seem a bit upset there, buddy boy.

File: 1421381813172.jpg (86KB, 480x640px) Image search: [Google]

86KB, 480x640px

>been playing 1 year spess
>5 being in /vg/
>never been cult, rev, vox raider, vampire, ling and fucking WIZARD

Am I cursed? yes, my prefferences are on

>>129004102
Literally all me

>>129004195
>>129004102
>>129003734
>Actually, unironically, not even kidding a little bit supporting Trump

Is it the contrarianism? Or because /pol/ told you it was cool?

>inb4 jew, sjw, faggot, liberal, commie etc

>>129004210
How many admins have you sucked off?

>sweating and swearing they scramble as fast they can to spam that fukken report button

Fuck your stupid server and everyone in the UK

>>129004464
Stumped.

>>129003583
>>129003609
Was it changed recently? Because I've personally seen someone install an AI into an empty core by dragging it through the windoor and having it in the exact same positioning as that guy has his welding tank, then clicking the empty spot where the AI needs to go in order to push it in there.

>>129004210
I'm playing for about one year as well.
2 Times Vox raider (it's a really rare mode anyways)
0 rev, vampire, wizard
about 3 times cult/new cops each
handful of ling rounds

>>129004464
I don't support anyone this election, I just think you seem a little riled up is all, friend.

>>129003734
>if anyone hates me, they're automatically European
>It's not possible for any other nationalities to hate me

>>129004634
Good argument, you sure convinced me with that elequent use of memetics.

>>129004694
What gives you impression?

>>129004464
Here's a better question: Why would anyone support any of the current 'candidates' for the presidential elections? They're all just a slightly different form of shit; with Trump and Bernie, you have men who have no idea how to run a country and will end up running both our economy or our sociopolitical structures into the ground; with Hillary, you have a power hungry old lady who's got a body trail leading straight to her that nobody questions because they don't want to become part of that trail.

Why would anyone in their right minds want ANY of these people holding any form of political power?

Even better question; Why are we discussing this in a general about a 2D space atmospherics and waifu simulator?

>>129004943
But what about people like Rand?

It's vaguely relevant because "HURRRR TIME TO DO THE BUILD A WALL GIMMICK AS CAPTAIN DURRRR I BREATH THROUGH MY MOUTH"

>>129004821
I welcome all non-americans to hate me.

I love all North Americas and South Americas.
and everyone in-between.
I love Germans, I love Poles, I love Russians, I love Chinese, Japanese, Taiwanese, and Koreans North and South. I love the Mediterranean and Egypt too. I only wish India Poo in Loo. But Fuck the UK and FUCK YOU TOOOOOO

>>129005135
>But Fuck the UK

Wise words.
When are we ousting that Celt cunt?

>>129003734
holy shit bro. youre absolutely right. This fucking place is worse than most but i couldnt pin it. youre absolutely right!

>>129005253
Celt did nothing wrong.

>>129005060
Rand and people like him don't have a chance because the only time the news will cover them is if they say something that the conservatives or the liberals will find 'controversial'. If they don't get on the news, then the average voter won't really know their names, their policies, or why they should vote for them. If nobody knows who they are, nobody will vote for them.

tldr; Rand and people akin to him won't be elected because they don't propose outlandish shit that nobody sane would ever want to have happen, so they don't get on the news, so nobody knows who they are.

tldr;tldr; Blame the fucking news media for our current state of affairs, it's their fault.

>>129003734
I'm Australian.

>>129005135
Fantastically worded argument. You sure convinced me to hate the UK too. Do you mind if I quote "Fuck the UK and FUCK YOU TOOOOOOOO" on my thesis?

>>129005378
This gentleman is the same one that posted the comment that he is referring to.

>>129004210
Create a new staticname to alter your hash

File: xWD6dIl.png (339KB, 1628x1420px) Image search: [Google]

339KB, 1628x1420px

>>129003371
>be miner
>after I brought my resources to the mechanic because science was useless I decided to fuck off in space
>find the abandoned ship
>stop by the satellite
>after I found the gooncode and got back on my ship I saw guy in an atmos space suit
>instead of stun cuffing him on sight or just killing him I tried to talk to him
>got stun killed within the next 2 seconds

trust no one in space

>>129005450
tl;dr sane people don't get votes because they're too smart

Can anyone describe a single one of Obama's policies, pre-inaugeration? They voted for him because he was black. People don't pick presidents based on ability or policies, they pick the personality they like the most.

>>129005460
Save it all, friend. These memes are yours to use.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rntRDqpaY2g
Swimming in pain he peered into the depths
And cried out in agony
Reaching out he grasped the runes
Before falling back from the abyss

>>129005460
youre wrong but thats normal for you pieces of garbage

>>129005710
>You pieces of garbage
Who?

>>129003734
I missed you, 2hotmemes

>>129005818
people from europe
non trump supporters

>>129005657
I believe his main holding point was 'free healthcare'.

Wait, my healthcare isn't free, it costs more since my insurance company now has to compensate for every new Bob McPoorson that can't pay his insurance fees, but has to have insurance or else they fine him for not paying for insurance that he can't pay for.

>>129005907
How do you know I'm either of them?
Also, I think you mean, "People who don't support Trump".

>>129005947
I always thought Obamacare was after he got elected. I couldn't ever see announcing a socialised medical care plan (no matter how gimped) working well for a candidate post-Red Scare.

Also, fining people for not having money is the single dumbest thing I can think of.

>>129005840
I've always been there, within your memeories.
and I always will be because I love you, anonymous.

Never forget your Ambassador of Love, Irvine Riker.

>>129006181
I think the actual plan for Obamacare was written up after he was elected, but I recall him promising to address healthcare reform, which everyone and their mother decided to assume would basically be 'cheaper/free/state funded' healthcare, and not 'Buy health insurance or else you have to pay the government a fine.', along with all the bullshit the insurance companies have to put up with alongside the leeches.

File: 1421380492752.png (7KB, 270x263px) Image search: [Google]

7KB, 270x263px

>>129004472
none because I haven't been a vampire yet

>>129006181
because you're already wrong as per our previous posts - hence a loser. Losers dont like Trump- fact

>>129006402
Obamacare is so fucking stupid. "Remember how you couldn't afford healthcare? Well you better buy that fucking insurance now, God help you if you don't." It could only be sillier if they kneecapped you as well.

>>129006472
Do you have a single fact to back that up?

>>129005253
I'm not in the UK, I'm in the north of Ireland, in the temporarily occupied six counties
>>129005409
Thanks hotdogs, you big old gayboy

BEHEAD ZACHARY

BEHEAD THOSE WHO INSULT POMF!
/vg/ IS THE STATION OF PEACE!

>>129007092
gas yourself, hippie.

>>129007092
Pomfs a bit annoying with his meme-spouting.
You can tell he is a broken man.

>>129006654

...Number 1: that's terror
Number 2: Burden of evidance

>>129007752
Evidence*
Seriously, show me a single piece of data that proves that everyone who does not support Trump is a loser.

>>129007535
the concept that is a meme is a fundamental piece of communication and infinitely more so when you move into electronic media, or E.M.s EMs for short.

I'm a professional Mass Electronic Media Expert. There isn't an official acronym yet but I'm getting my business cards changed this year.

>>129008137
fuck off, shitposting faggot.

>>129008137
Do you shitpost because it gives you a stiffy or because you have literally nothing else to be doing?

Free Kingston

File: 1308107067134 (1).jpg (13KB, 180x312px) Image search: [Google]

13KB, 180x312px

>>129003371
>new to the game
>think it's a persistent game and not round based
>shuttle comes and goes
>didn't get on it
>round ends
>dreams crushed
>mfw

>>129008449
>SS13 becomes persistent

that's fucking horrifying

>iceberg thread on /v/

CLOSE THE BUNKER

File: my 64.jpg (56KB, 780x780px) Image search: [Google]

56KB, 780x780px

>>129008346
>>129008291
[fuck off] , [shitposting] {faggot} .

To normal people who live outside of this new computer-age techno-language the memes in brackets would be completely misunderstood.
The only portion of the sentence that would be understood is faggot which could also very well meme another memeing. Such as a bundle of sticks. Now without memes being shared and expressed honestly there would be only confusion among us users of this new language. Only because I understand context and contrasts of these memes by experience of being here I understand what these memes actually really meme in the way you are memeing them.

You're telling me to adhere to your line of thinking and to leave for expressing myself truely, honestly, boldly, beautifully, proudly and that leave or stay I am a faggot either way.

Well to your memes I offer you this countermeme: Nigga, you corny as all heck fuck outta here

>>129008797
why so?

>>129008449
Have you ever seen a station that's been around for more than a few hours? Usually it's on fire, infested with xenos, filled with spiders from a virus, had a hole gouged through it by the singulo, blown to pieces by bombs, or any combination thereof.

If the game was persistent, the station would simply become unlivable after the seven or eight-hour mark.

>>129009058
tl dr
fuck off

>>129009194

see >>129009278

>>129003371
>AI
>Goon uterus
>syndies break into my asshole
>lethal turrets, fuck 'em
>bwoink
>too stupid to realize laws are sequential
>jobbant

>>129003371
>AIing
>4:00 AM
>Having a top quality discussion about Grey and Red Squirrels in OOC
>Also managing the Singularity
>Accidentally Singuloose
My one and only ban

>Be bored
>Browsing around bans
>Find this
http://pastebin.com/0hp6z78C

What the fuck

>>129009278
B U I L D

U

I

L

D

>>129010496
I was Legless Lucy. I was waiting for "extends probiscus!" but it never came.

File: bird hat 3.png (367KB, 3200x2135px) Image search: [Google]

367KB, 3200x2135px

>>129000146

>>129010932
The majority of our playerbase is not autistic enough to have fun just rebuilding the station.
And the minority that are would probably get tired of it after the 20 or 30th consecutive time they'd have to rebuild.

i hate u

>>129011301
I love you

>>129006213
You say you love me, but what if I said I was a former admin, one of the guys who banned you and rejected your appeals?

>>129010948
I want to fuck Kitty Dock!

>>129013476
Have you SEEN the "art" of her?

>that guy murdering people on the shuttle with goo

File: bird hat -3.png (156KB, 3200x2135px) Image search: [Google]

156KB, 3200x2135px

>>129011097

>tfw nobody's drawn fanart or made fanfiction of my staticname
Feels good, man.

Feature freeze milestone 3% complete
At this rate we'll be done in another 30-35 days!
never

File: 1416425871438.png (63KB, 300x185px) Image search: [Google]

63KB, 300x185px

gas the vox, race war now


thanks rail

File: 923a498040fd1968892165989447f26c.png (47KB, 342x301px) Image search: [Google]

47KB, 342x301px

Will you ever be the miner that science needs?

File: Darth Atris.jpg (46KB, 747x551px) Image search: [Google]

46KB, 747x551px

>>129012847
I forgave the council for casting me out a long time ago. It's plainly obvious that the council never forgave themselves for wrongfully casting me out.

Can we nerf xeonarch please?
Every round now there are 2 xenoarchs minimum, who instantly fuck off to the roid without touching research.

And they even have the nerve to get pissy when I take their RnD consoles away.

>>129013902
>Tfw my old staticname is living happily on a planet with a musclegirl wife and three beautiful spider daughters
And he wont be coming back

>>129013902
I dunno, sometimes getting some nice, subtle art from the better artists is nice. It's nice if you get it for being good at your job, not for being some slutty attention whore of a waifu.

>>129014084
That's literally the opposite of what people were complaining about a month ago
Fuck off

>>129013556
Yep. Artist made her tits too big. Your point?

Can't wait for Valentine's day :^^^^)

>>129014407
It's fucking ugly.

>>129013985
Holy fuck that's almost as much diamond as I found in the whole round with a diamond drill Ripley

>>129014084
Why not play as RD and demote them if they don't do RnD?

>>129013985
When I bring them 10 of each at station time 12:05 and they never need any more.

>shuttle called because of clown virus
>centcomm recalls it for obvious reasons
>eventually the shuttle departs to centcomm full of clowns
>deadchat is constantly arguing that centcomm wouldn't let infected personnel on like that
>(admin): that's why we're gonna have MEDICAL INSPECTORS
>wonder what he's on about, teleport to centcomm
>admin putting ghosts in death squad at the dock
>hover over a death squad with mouse
>MEDICAL INSPECTOR
10/10

>>129014680
They blew my Ripley even though I wasn't infected and it was running on isolated atmosphere
That was rude of them

>>129014680
>you were the one who freed the virus by bringing yourself and a patient into one of the monkey rooms of virility
>you accidently caused all this
Oh god. I just wanted to help people!

>>129014458
Seems more like the artist and not the character.

>security reports that the camera in telecomms storage is deactivated
>go look into it
>find the mechanic in there along with a DNA modifier and a box of monkey cubes
>we just stare at each other for about 10 seconds in dead silence
>I know he's a vampire/ling, and he knows that I know
>finally break the silence and ask him what he's doing
>"Oh, you know, just some private genetics experiments"
>afraid to call him out on it, despite both of us knowing it's absolute bullshit
>don't want to be a metagaming shitter who calls someone a changeling because of a monkey cube and genetics equipment
>accept the excuse for what it is
>quietly repair the camera and leave
>5 minutes later he's gone from telecomms storage and all the equipment with him
>never see him again until round-end

>>129014485
I am really beginning to like meta-club.

>>129014984
Meta's fucking great for mining.

When I play miner, I play a diona because I'm a powergaming fuck
As long as you walk away from it every few seconds so it doesn't break your bones, you can easily punch a goliath to death
It would take a really long time so I haven't done it, but I regularly beat them to death with just a pickaxe and walk away unscathed

Dionae should probably be nerfed but I'm not going to complain

>>129014949
>>don't want to be a metagaming shitter who calls someone a changeling because of a monkey cube and genetics equipment
Would you give the AI the benefit of the doubt if you saw a blue APC in tcomms? I mean, how do you KNOW that it shat out from a milf? NanoTrasen's equipment is notoriously buggy, after all.

>>129015316
Diona requiring an atmosphere involving oxygen to be able to regenerate when?

>>129014949
>don't want to be a metagaming shitter who calls someone a changeling because of a monkey cube and genetics equipmen

There's really no point in not metagaming. Everyone else does it at this point; otherwise you'll never get those precious validz until it's too late and they're chopping everyone to pieces with an esword.

>>129015374
>Would you give the AI the benefit of the doubt if you saw a blue APC in tcomms?
I would make sure to report it so it's known, but yes, I would give it the benefit of the doubt.
APCs also become bluescreened if someone emags them, so the prospect of it being a traitor trying to pass off blame is perfectly possible. It's happened before.

>>129014675
this honestly, science doesn't need more than that unless they want to powergame and make ablative armors, bags of holding and advanced energy gun for all of them

>>129015431
Honestly, it would actually be dangerous for dionae if any of the asteroid mobs dealt burn damage, as burn damage totally slaughters dionae
But as it stands, everything there deals brute, which means the greatest threat anything there poses to a diona is broken bones
And even then, just keeping an eye on your health indicator and stepping away for a few seconds when anything starts blinking is enough to keep you from ever dropping below green health in a fistfight with a goliath

>>129015618
Dunno about you, but I'd be disconnecting the fun things in atmos and locking the borgs lickety split the instant I see a blue APC, muh meatgayme.

File: Bashful Thing with a Beak.png (7KB, 334x291px) Image search: [Google]

7KB, 334x291px

>>129015316
>spider infestation in virology
>diona runs in with a circular saw, saying he literally can't die from it
>yells over comms that both of his hands are broken half a minute later
>gets sleeptox'd and cocooned
>virology gets bombed anyways

>>129016194
Yeah, you still have to be careful
You can get broken bones if you're an idiot who doesn't pay attention to your health indicator
But if you do watch your health, there isn't much that can get you with brute damage

Also he was technically right
He didn't die from the spiders

>>129016532
That's right, he died from the spiders subduing him and leaving him paralyzed for 20 minutes and subsequently getting gibbed.
So, from the spiders.

>>129014940
The character is a 32x32 2D spessman

what version of byond did they switch over to the streaming thing instead of downloading resources

because its shit

File: 1426626627328.jpg (48KB, 415x415px) Image search: [Google]

48KB, 415x415px

>there are people playing ss13 RIGHT NOW that don't think vox are cute

Downloaded byond on my windows 10 laptop, it won't open. It only appears as a background process in the task manager. What do?

>>129017048
Run as admin

>>129017048
Have you tried killing and reopening it?

>>129017152
thanks friend

File: tumblr_m5ufc4GwJ61qdhsxp.0.jpg (23KB, 500x327px) Image search: [Google]

23KB, 500x327px

>>129016532
>>129016194
>be dionea
>get hands broken
>wait 3 seconds for health to regen
>hands are still broken but work perfectly anyway

I looked at my health after taking some burn damage 1 hour later and they were still broken go figure

>>129017184
>non-antag murder
BAN

>>129017047
>lore-abiding vox are flea-infested feathered maggots.
dude

File: 1421991486027.gif (648KB, 380x380px) Image search: [Google]

648KB, 380x380px

>>129017301

BIRDS

>>129017047
>there are people playing ss13 RIGHT NOW who don't kill non-humans

>>129017236
Dionae don't heal broken bones but they also don't always seem to care
I once went a whole round with both hands and one leg broken and I don't think any of that did anything

>>129017301
can you cite the flea part