Meanwhile, on the USG /v/shimura...

>>388809383
Why does it sound like someone's jacking off in the air ducts?

WELCOME TO THE SPACE JAM

Hydroponics is heading down to the ZGBB court, anyone think they can beat us?
If you beat us, we'll let you go into food storage and pick up whatever you want, rations be damned

What's that noise?

I think all this crazy shit is happening because of that insect-penis shaped rock.

Anyone else feeling ethical issues with our job? I mean in 20 million years these barren planets we're mining for resources might've been capable of sustaining life.

>>388809856
I think it's the engineers doing shit in the vents
Dunno what the fuck the vents have to offer but maybe they're fixing all the damage caused by those fags who have been hanging out in there

/ishimurapol/

what do you guys think about the weird cultist marker fags so far?

>>388809993
Fuck off pussy, these are lifeless rocks and we need more goddamn metal

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God i can't wait until i catch the one FUCKER whos been clogging the damn TOILETS

>>388810101
Unitologists are redpilled as fuck
Certainly better than all the degenerate Pengcucks we have on the ship

Does anyone else here voices telling them to eat people coming from the a/c?
Seems more and more like a good idea

>>388810252
AGAIN, who gives a shit about the vents. Probably just nothing

>>388810353
Meet me in the vents 1on1 bitch

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I'm making coffee

Holy shit shut up about the fucking vents, they're tubes to bring nice cool air around, nothing else, you guys do know we're here to do a job, right?
Miners are the only ones who are doing shit around here

>>388809383
yeah nigga I follow gaming ecelebs and their playthroughs on youtube too

>>388810417
I've got better things to do fucker
Like calling you A FAGGOT >>388810483

>>388810486
>ecelebfags
get the fuck out
Also what shitty eceleb is JUST NOW doing dead space, a game that is 8 years old

Was in medical yesterday and I swear Dr Brennan wants me to crack her planet if you know what I'm saying.....

Who.is excited to go see that aliem dildo they bought on board?
Engineering says it should be viewable soon

>>388810584
>Cracking HER planet
>Instead of cracking THE FUCKING PLANET YOUR SUPPOSED TO CRACK

I hope you get fired and then thrown out of space

>>388810564
those fucking canadians that cant seem to do anything right
sorry to infest, I was just leaving. there's no coincidence here seeing as it started today

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>>388810483
36 hours in MS Paint

>>388810682
im OP and it is a coincidence, I don't watch other people play video games

I sure do love just being a regular blue-collared engineer and not part of some secret cult, right fellow Joes? Mondays am I right?
Hey, did you guys hear about that cool rock they picked up? We should probably just all go and hang out next to it and see what it has to say. Who knows, maybe we'll reach some kind of ascension, hahahaha just joking.

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Ishimura plebs are fags

UAC Mars Masterrace

ALTMAN BE PRAISED!

>>388810672
Fuck you and fuck cap. mathius.

All he talks about is that stupid red rock anyways.

>>388810682
>>388810486
/v/ has had Dead Space threads like this for awhile, anon.

>>388810913
Fuck of ascension shills

How much do they pay you to post this shit on my codec?

>>388810958
>One maybe to ships fucked up
>ENTIRE FUCKING PLANET FUCKED UP

kek
>>388811006
Fucking Markercuck

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SUP ISHIFAGS
USM Valor here. We're just about to shockdrive back to Earth so we can slay some sweet EarthGov pussy. Have fun with your space rocks!

MAKE US WHOLE :^)

>>388811139
Fucking military Chaaaaaaaaaaaads! GET THE FUCK OUT OF OUR SECTOR
REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

>>388811006
Desire to praise intensifies

>>388811016
Fuck you too cunt, you go enjoy your flesh onahole and get space AIDS.

>>388811139
REEEEEEEEEEEEE GET THE FUCK OUT STUPID FUCKING SPACE CHADS GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE STUPID JARHEAD KEKS
>>388811251

I SAID FUCK OFF MARKERKEKS REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

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>>388811220
Ishumuras women belong to us planet Cracker boi
How can miners even compete?

>>388811514
Fuck off you're just gonna get raped by some fucking gay ass goddamned alien up the ass while we're drowning in money minerals and poussy FUK YOU FUCKING CHAD USS VALOR REEEEEEEEEEEEE

>>388811656
Tell me when you make this money

/spoiler/ how do I taste when you eat her clapped puss out

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>>388811803
I'm gonna make a fuckton of money through hardwork and effort and then get all the girls unlike you FUCKER

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>>388811656
You

They are playing the SciFi classic "aliens" in the rec room tonight.
Never seen it, is it any good?

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>>388811656
The guy she tells you not to worry about

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No one wants to play titty moba with me

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>>388812183
Pic related is me and I'm gonna fuck YOU UP SO DAMN BAD

>>388812324
Oh yeah?
Does your uncle for the CEC as well?

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>>388812439
He OWNS the GODDAMNED CEC fucker im rich

pic related its u

>>388809383
They say I wasn't built for this life but I'm a damn good sink dropper, I studied geology but after I lost my leg and my wife in a car wreck I ended up giving up on earth. Fuck Montana and their open skies. Fuck the Rockies. Now I drop charges and we devour mountains, we absorb open skies.
Still, if I'm ever gonna get back into 1G I should move around more. I've been wearing the same prosthesis for 14 years and everyone says I should give the new Miodynes a chance but I've grown attached.
I've started dreaming of her again. It's the strangest thing but sometimes I feel like I'm not even sleeping when I hear her voice. I caught myself wandering towards that thing they found today because I heard her coming from that room. My leg didn't even hurt as I started hobbling over as fast as I could. She wasn't there.
I went again last night, hoping to hear her again.
I heard them both. Cassandra and the baby.
I've got to get the fuck out of here.
This is definitely gonna be my last cycle, I wasn't built for this kind of life.

US/v/ Ishimura here, you guys are fags. How far behind are you on your planet cracking schedule now? A decade? Stay bad, nerds.

>>388812656
Say that to my face bitch.
I got a brand new plasma cutter I can't wait to try out.

>>388812292
Are you lonely? Are you cute?

>>388809508
BECAUSE I'M JACKING OFF IN THE AIR DUCTS.

>>388813035
>he just has a plasma cutter
>probably not even aftermarket modded

>>388813202
>has to mod to enjoy his plasma cutter and can't enjoy vanilla PC for what it is.
You are the cancer on this ship

I might try fucking one of those Necromorphs. Maybe it'll become my girlfriend.

Dave here. Why are we still here?

Do you have a minute to talk about Unitology?

>>388810101
Unitologists are faggots and anyone who believes that shit is retarded. Convergence? Nice meme fags.

>>388810101
They are a jewish trick, dont trust them.

>>388814057
You mean (((unitlogists)))

Those alien communist cultists really do take "everyone becomes the same" part litetarly

>>388810564
Not an eceleb, but I only first played Dead Space last year.

Member of the engineer team here. Please stop locking the main doors, I'm tired of going through the ventilation to get to my shift.

brb going outside for a smoke

>>388816782
>engineer
>can't even unlock a door
t. 6 month newhire

>>388813824
My girlfriend become a necromorph and she left me.

>>388813864
Fuck off Dave, stop stealing my power nodes.

-Steve

>>388809383

Audiolog found on corpse of Engineering team member alongside a few Neuro-Electric Tether grenades:

>guys, Roberts says he's found a new weapon, he's calling it the NET - stands for Neuro-Electric Tether. He needs someone to test it, he's captured a test subject and so when he says go, you just throw the NET.

GO!

(AUDIOLOG DECAYS INTO SCREAMING, STATIC, FAINT CRY OF "THROW IT AT HIM, NOT ME!")

>>388818434
kek

>>388818434
Have all of my yous

>>388816782
>Can't unlock door
Stop being bad newfag

>>388816782
it's a push door, try not pulling it ya dingus

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>>388812183

>sticking Isaac in some gung-ho military get up
>using anything other than the plasma cutter and TK and the engineers suits

>>388809856
IT'S A PIPEBOMB!

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>>388809383
Are we there yet?

>>388810252
>>388810417
Engineering here. Get the fuck outta the vents or im turning off the a/c!

>>388819134
YAAAAAAAAYYY!!

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>>388819217
make me bitch