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>Villain is so powerfully unstoppable the protagonist gives up

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>Villain is so powerfully unstoppable the protagonist gives up
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>Gordon actually died right after Episode 2 ended
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>G-Man actually locked up Gordon at the end of HL2 and the episodes are just a hallucination
>>
Pro tip: if you're a normal scientist dude fighting an intergalactic alien empire that can apparently manipulate the fabric of reality, you eventually come to the conclusion that there is jack shit you could possibly ever do to change the situation

What people are reading is cosmic horror for the modern age. Humanity is doomed and there is nothing you can do about it.
>>
>>388180929
FUCK VALVE
>>
a shame, I would have actually liked this ending
>>
>>388180838
Gordon died during the resonance cascade. All of the games are his Jacob's Ladder type hallucination

how lazy and uninspired was that?
>>
>>388181432
>Gordon Freeman overdosed before the experiment and everything afterwards is a nightmare gone downhill
How many layers of postmodernism are we on?
>>
>>388181941
isn't that the exact script of Afraid of Monsters?
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It happened in this book series too, which also had a cliffhanger
>>
>>388180582

a fucking DYSON SPHERE.

Id quit just knowing they were attempting one, but THEY HAVE A DYSON SPHERE
>>
>>388180582
someone sum up the leak half life 3 plot for me
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>>388182075
Didn't even knew that mod existed until i googled the name.
>>
>>388182528

They find the Aperture Science (portal 2) super weapon.

Alyx kills her stepmom in order to suicide the weapon into the combine portal that's sending out the troops

As the super weapon is crashing into the portal, the Gman steps in and saves alyx, leaving you behind, to die.

Gordon watches as he approaches the combine worlds, they have a DYSON SPHERE, and realizes that there is nothing they can do to stop them.

as he's about to blow up, Vortigaunts port him back to earth, who knows when into the future, only to see everything destroyed anyways.
>>
>>388183047
>muh sphere
Why is that important
>>
>>388183178
dyson spheres are fuckign huge, bigger than the sun huge. if the combine have the tech and resources to make that then what chance does earth have?
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>>388183178

a dyson sphere is a level of technology that can use the sun as AA batteries.

When the super weapon hit the combine, it did nothing. at all. a civilization that has the tech to build a dyson sphere are literally gods to us.
>>
>>388183178
it speaks volume on how advanced they are and how hopeless fighting a civilization like that is. They can harness 100% of the energy of A FUCKING STAR. That's a lot of energy anon.
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>>388183047
That would have been fucking amazing. Holy shit.
>>
>>388183178
They have an entire star's worth of energy available to them.

Granted energy output varies a lot from one star to another but it's still basically akin to unlimted power.
>>
>>388182528
>>388183047
Forgot to mention the Borealis can basically hop between dimensions, and the Combine need it because they have shitty teleportation technology.
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>>388180929
>Humanity is doomed and there is nothing you can do about it.

humanity is saved. the combine are infinitely more advanced, integration into their cause is fine with me
>>
>>388182535
Do yourself a favor and play it. One of the best half life mods ever created.
>>
>>388183941
>google it
>within seconds
>"David Leatherhoff"

hahahah no, you don't just combine together parts of names. Leatherhoff.
>>
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>>388183178
>>muh sphere
This, fuck the sun and lets allahsnackbar the aliens to hell.
>>
>>388183832

You do realize this is what they have planned for humanity right?

Solder fodder. and low level workers
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>>388183047

>valve says that people are hyping EP3 way too much that they wont ever be satisfied
>this happens
>plot can stand perfectly to the hype

Whats stopping you valve, fucking jews
>>
>>388183178
Humans are the ants invading your kitchen.

You are the Combine.
>>
>>388183047
A game with this plot could take three times the hype of HL3, holy shit.
>>
>>388184327
Why is humanity even needed at all? Especially as soldiers, since they seemed to do alot better as the HECU than as Combine
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>>388184491
Valve has changed.
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>>388184696
humanity cought their attention thanks to Black Mesa inventing an intergalactic teleport by accident, or rather, because of the resonance cascade. Their own portal tech is surprisingly a lot more primitive. That's the main reason they invaded earth.
>>
>>388184491
This. It's pretty goddamn decent, and more brave than any other game so far.
>>
>>388184491
That ending is too fatalistic for normies to handle.
>>
>>388184696
Why is Earth even needed at all? They have a dyson sphere. It's like fighting with homeless guy over a cardboard box in the alleyway next to the skyscraper you own.
>>
>>388184949
>>388184327
meaning that they'll retain humanity for our unique characteristics, not waste us.

they can invent a dyson sphere, but we can invent even higher technology, without anything that we built it upon. this means we are more intelligent than them or they have lost some ability to explore
>>
>>388185010
Because they can. And Borealis time and space hopping tech.
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>>388185010
Earth had teleportation technology that they didn't. That' why they wanted the Borealis.
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>>388183375
>a civilization that has the tech to build a dyson sphere are literally gods to us

>meanwhile, their soldiers are using convential weapons, armor, and vehicles

It's a pretty noticeable disparity. The fucking gravity gun is deadlier than anything the combine throw at you.
>>
>>388185010
>>388184696
It's a thing the combine do. Enslaving alien species and stealing their natural resources and technlogy. They did it with the vortigaunts and... whatever striders originally were, they'll do it with humans.
>>
>>388185119
>>388185145
Ok. Fair enough. Except, instead of saying "Here's 20 dollars and a bag of heroin for the cardboard box, now fuck off" to the homeless guy, they opted to try to slowly peel off his skin, drink his booze, and turn the other homeless guys in the alleyway into mindless limbless zombies.
>>
>>388185158

its about resources, you can still die from arrows and rocks being thrown at you
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>>388185158

They came for knowledge, not more bodies to incorporate. If they glass the planet they gain nothing, that's why they worked with Dr Breen in the first place, To get the scientist to comply and surrender so that the Advisors can actually suck the data out of there brains like they did with Eli.
>>
>>388185158
>meanwhile, their soldiers are using convential weapons, armor, and vehicles
Their own solderers are never shown in the game, what we fight are transhuman collaborators and other alien races they have enslaved.
>>
>>388185158
The Combine you fight in the games is just a small Earth branch
The fat worms aren't even Combine, just some small fry bug that the Combine send to do errands they don't even care about
>>
>>388185158
THey have some pretty big gaps in their technology. For example, they mastered interdimentional teleportation, but still have issues with local teleportation, which is actually something humans were able to achieve at Black Mesa.
>>
>>388185158
They don't give enough of a shit to send their real forces, plus they are so damn massive of an Empire.

Sure we have teleportation tech, but it honestly isn't that important to them.

If they get it, good for them

If we figh them an off, oh well they are still a Universal Empire.
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>>388185330
It's implied in ep2 that the slugs hatch into actual Combines.
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>>388181432
>WE ARE BAD PEOPLE WHY DID WE USHER FORTH THE GREEN APOCALYPSE
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>>388185009
all of the games kind of end on a bit of a downer

>yeah you got out of black mesa but the world is under attack and you are in stasis

>yeah you blew up the citadel but you were standing right in the center of the explision and it seems like G-Man left Alex to die saving only Gordon

>yeah you got out of City 17 but it blew up again and the slug monsters all got away

>closed the superportal but eli gets shanked and the combine are about to find our secret portal technology

its a fitting end I feel to the episodes leaving room to do something new with 3
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>>388185452
No it's not.
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>>388185317
Yo that's pretty terrifying.
>>
>>388185329
>>388185330
>>388185409

You fight striders and dropships, which most certainly did not originate on Earth, and aren't anything close to godlike.

If a giant spindly bug creature/vehicle that can easily die to conventional explosives is supposed to be an example of their 'real' military might, I'm not sure why anyone is worried. Just give a guy a gravity gun, a buggy and an endless supply of sticky bombs. He'll take care of it.
>>
>>388185489
I DON'T WANT TO BE SCHIZOPHRENIC!
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>>388185625
>yeah bro it doesnt matter if they can make a dyson sphere
>these ground attack units they mashed together arent TOTALLY SPECIAL

bro, you don't seem to understand: they could simply evaporate the earth if they wanted. we are cosmic bacteria to them.
>>
>>388185625
Striders are an enslaved race. There was probably a civilization of them somewhere in the multiverse and they probably didn't have any mechanical parts. They also have weirdly human looking brains.
>>
Sticky crashes the page what the fuck happened
>>
>>388185317
>came for knowledge

THEY ARE LITERALLY A TYPE 2 OR 3 CIVILIZATION ALREADy

WHAT THE FUCK COULD A NOT-EVEN-TYPE-1 CIVILIZATION HAVE THAT THEY DON'T ALREADY HAVE/KNOW

The Combine are literally incomprehensible to us. They have the power to reach out across dimensions. They did not come to Earth for resources as the entire universe is full of resources. They did not come to Earth for knowledge as we are basically infants to them. They did not come to Earth for thralls as their numbers of even their expeditionary forces overwhelmed the entirety of Earth in a mere 7 hours.

Maybe that's why they killed Ep3. There was no feasible reason for the Combine to attack Earth.
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>>388185625

Everything, the war, the occupation, that was a scouting party.

The entirety of HL2 EP1 was about STOPPING the combine from requesting reinforcements by going back into the Citadel and stopping it from sending the signal.
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>>388185793
yea combine seem to have a fetish for turning everythhing into cyborgs
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>>388185831
>WHAT THE FUCK COULD A NOT-EVEN-TYPE-1 CIVILIZATION HAVE THAT THEY DON'T ALREADY HAVE/KNOW

......so you didnt actually read the blog and youre here commenting for some reason

you are, literally, the worst type of person
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>>388185489
>Freeman's Mind will definitively end at the Episode 2 cliffhanger
At least that won't happen until at least five years from now.
>>
>>388185831

The renaissance cascade in HL1 was an accident set up by the G Man, we don't know why, but that attracted the combine to earth, they want to know how we did that, they want our short range teleport tech that we accidentally discovered.

Just because they are Type 2-3 doesn't mean they want to stop advancing.
>>
>>388185939
they're called the combine for a reason
>>
>>388185831
You're an idiot, they came for the teleportation tech black mesa accidently created with the help of the Gman. The Borealis could travel seamlessly through both space AND time. Conquering all of creation with that tech would be child's play.
>>
>>388185793
I'm pretty sure it was stated at some point that striders and gunships are biological constructs, not a race
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>>388186046
HL4 will reveal they are actually a civilization of sentient combine harvesters.

That's how infinite parallel universes work, right? Infinite possibilities?
>>
You pretty much need a super saiyan at this point to stop the combine.
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>>388183047


Waiting for the Dyson sphere fanarts
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>>388185010
It's not, really. Their primary target is the teleportation technology invented by Black Mesa and Aperture.

In HL2 they are in the process of assimilating humans and human tech, while scrapping the planet for resources.
If you pay attention in HL2, all the canals and shores have very low water levels with exposed docks and grounded ships because the Combine is literally sucking up water and teleporting it to their home dimension. One can assume they are doing the same with the air and mineral resources.
>>
>>388185704
>oh, so that's it huh, Mr CIA. I should have known this shit would happen. I'm an expendable asset. And he runs off with the girl...mold the total amateur into someone else he can exploit before he throws her away. She had the balls to throw the switch at least, have to give her credit for that. Welp, nothing left to do but die, I guess.... Accelerating at least mach 3 should be instantaneous, no pain... and hey! Maybe I'll get to confirm if any religion was right or it was all bullshit and there's nothing waiting for me be an infinite endless void of nothing... being dead sucks if that's true. Ok, changed my mind I DON'T WANNA BE SPAGHETTIFIED BY THE EVENT HORIZON! LET ME OUTTA HERE!

>Holy shit, is that...is that a Dyson Sphere? No...
>>
>>388185746
>they could simply evaporate the earth if they wanted

And you realize that, if true, there's a fucking HUGE disparity between the level of technology we are talking about? It's like if the Roman Empire had space shuttles, but still fought with swords and shields.

>>388185864

>Everything, the war, the occupation, that was a scouting party.

And that's dumb as fuck. You don't occupy a planet with a scouting party. You send them fully armed and capable of crushing any kind of resistance/uprising. Because if you don't, the pissed off locals are going to be capable of kicking your ass, quite possibly before you can call in these supposedly godlike reinforcements. So what that tells me is that a civilization capable of building a massive stellar structure, is also completely incompetent when it comes to basic warfare.
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>>388186165
that's the part that makes the least sense to me about the Combine. They are basically doing it just to be dicks, I see no reason they would waste their time with earths resources. Hydrogen isn't rare in the universe, if anything there's way too much of that knocking about. Get rid of it.
>>
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Can someone sum up the plot of HL1 for me? Especially why the military wanted us dead and why we went to fight a giant alien baby.
>>
>>388184587

A virus can kill a human and it's small as fuck
>>
>>388186294
>And that's dumb as fuck. You don't occupy a planet with a scouting party.

the earth surrendered in 7 hours, a scouting party is all they needed.

>also completely incompetent when it comes to basic warfare.

they didn't expect Gordon Freeman and the Gman fucking things up.
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>>388186358
because Black Mesa needed to be purged and the giant baby is the overlord for the border world Xen
>>
>>388186165
>>388186319
they're not "sucking up water to send to their home dimension" you sound like a fucking idiot. THEY POSSESS A DYSON SPHERE, THEY HAVE INFINITE AMOUNTS OF HYDROGEN AND OXYGEN, LOL.

the water is being "sucked up" to use it in massive structures/machinery, for cooling, etc. Because of the changes to the atmosphere caused by the portal storms, who knows how the condensation and rainfall cycle works anymore

think a *little* harder. Sucking up water to send it to their dimension. jesus fuck kid. I've never said this to anyone but go read a scifi book
>>
I wanted to see the G-man defeat the combine. ;_;
>>
>>388186319

It's all up for speculation really. Almost nothing is known about Combine society and how it functions. For all we know they could just be the biggest dicks in the multiverse and do stuff like this for shits and giggles. Maybe they're just massive narcissists or religious freaks.
>>
>>388186358
Military was sent to cover-up the incident and hopefully keep it contained.
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>>388186418
viruses can target a specific vital internal structure and destroy it in order to reproduce itself. ants just crawl around like retards looking for food
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>>388186505
the real question is who does he work for?
>>
>>388186418
Ants are not viruses. Ants are just annoying little pests that are somewhat tenacious and a pain in the ass to get rid of once they've settled in.
>>
>>388183047
>>388180582

Humanity still has a chance against the combine, by working together with the oppressed civilizations like xen.

>inb4 the combine were just another victims of the g-man race.
>>
>>388186358

The scale of our opponent is so great they use another conquered and enslaved race as cannon fodder to wear us down once we open the portal. The Xen alien baby was probably their equilivent to humanities Dr.Breen in that he sold out his race to the combine for meager survival.
>>
>>388186573

well according to the leak its not earth, thats for fucking sure.
>>
>>388186294
Bruh what you're asking is like using a a clusterbomb to tale out an ant hill.

Just use some cheap poison aka weak ass races you enslaved and or their own tech and give it a few days to kill em off.
>>
>>388186358
The army was sent to cover up the mess and kill all witnesses
And the the scientists thought the source of all the portals was that baby alien
>>
>>388186319
STOP TALKING SHIT
>>
If the combine are so great how come they were being victims of headcrabs?
>>
>>388186319
It's probably just an administrative issue; they have a checklist over what kind of planets they want and Earth happen to fit the list so they send the standard "take over the planet" to-do list with instruction for their space slug servants to handle while if in fact Earth is taken or not is of no importance to them.
>>
>>388186319
The Combine is from another dimension, maybe hydrogen is rare in their dimension.

As for being dicks, that's like expecting a human to stop mowing the lawn because there are insects in the grass.
>>
>>388186125
half life is dead forever
read the sticky
>>
>>388186573
>>388186680
He's just doing random shit for shits and giggles
>>
>>388186798
Half Life 4 confirmed
>>
>>388186680
>>388186813

he's Rick Sanchez
>>
>>388180929
>literal cuckposting on /v/
Color me surprised
>>
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>>388186813
>ywn be an interdimensional business man messing with galactic politics and time travel for the lulz
>>
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>>388186762
The humanoid Combine soldiers are humans made into cyborgs
>>
>>388186739
no need to be jealous because no one wants to spend Valentines day with you Steve.
>>
>>388186916
Civil Protection Unit is 100% human though
They only get converted to cyborg later on when they gain ranks.
>>
>>388186916
They sure did a shitty job when a scientist on some orange suit can take one down with a few crowbar swings.
>>
>>388183047
>couldve gone back in time and fucked up the combine or researched it to gain an advantage
>MUH DAD WE GOTTA DESTROY THIS SHIP

Alyx is so fucking retarded holy shit
>>
>>388183047
>Dude defeatist and cowardy lmao
And you guys praise this stuff?
>>
>>388186475
>a scouting party is all they needed

Well, that's wrong. Because the game shows you that insurgents with submachine guns completely blew them the fuck out.

I'd understand this argument if they mostly took everything they needed from Earth and weren't too bothered about the uprising succeeding at that point, since it took years and years for the resistance to get to a place where it could successfully attempt to overthrow the Combine. But apparently Earth was valuable enough even at that point that they were calling for reinforcements.

>>388186697
>Just use some cheap poison aka weak ass races you enslaved

Which didn't work. They lost. The Citadel was destroyed and their attempt to open a portal to bring in reinforcements was a failure, because they decided to use a cheap poison instead of an actually effective one.

Again, this comes back to my point about the disparity. If they have the capability to build a Dyson sphere, then surely they can build a fucking tank (or something equivalent) impervious to anything that human beings can build. Send 50 of those to Earth, station them around the Citadel, and watch the resistance flounder as it comes up against a weapon that it has absolutely no way to kill.

The idea that the Combine are this godlike race with supreme intelligence falls the fuck apart if you try and justify any of their actions in the context of the games.
>>
>>388187059
its not like he had any help either
>>
>>388187059
Adding more parts makes things more fragile, anon, not less fragile.
>>
>>388187064

She was never in control, She was being used by the Gman since she was a child.
>>
>>388187025
Not converted, they get chips inserted into them that strips them from their feelings when they get enough sterilize credits
>>
>>388187120
what? That has nothing to do with fragility. Makes things more prone to breaking, but adding more cement to your wall probably won't make it more fragile.
>>
>>388187196
adding my dick to your asshole will make you more fragile, faggot
>>
>>388187116
My guess for the disparity is that they are so huge that the guts we fight are completely different from the ones across the universe, so maybe we are just fighting a shitty part of the combine?
>>
>>388187153
typical
>>
>>388187196
>drawing a line between "prone to breaking" and "fragile"

I hate every single person who posts on 4chan these days
>>
>>388187252
this faggot fugged your dad, you fagmosexual.
>>
That blog was like a HL fanfic written by Lovecraft. What a hopeless ending. Honestly not sure how Valve would make HL3 if they ever did release ep3.
>>
>>388187270
People are failing to think on cosmic scales

The combine are simultaneously doing this to over one million planets at the same time, at any time, probably
>>
>>388187153
>>388187275
>>388187064

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aejntEMJdZM
>>
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>>388182394

Bitch please, I build Dysons like the Chinks build iPhones in Stellaris. Just gotta get that megastructuring tech and you're good to go.
>>
>>388183047
>Alyx actually leaves Gordon behind without a care

Why Alyx
>>
>>388187401
because nerds don't get to get laid.
>>
We never got to see Gordon fugg Alyx. Grief is nature's most powerful aphrodisiac.
>>
>>388187401
How about you read what Marc actually wrote instead of a tldr with lots of crap removed
>>
>>388187401

Some sort of compulsion or mind control.

Remember when he made her deliver that message to her dad? She wasn't even aware of it.
>>
>All of thise happened, every single thing, was because we pushed a fucked crystal into a machine
>>
I always figured the end goal was to severe the Combine's ability to get to earth, which would buy them time as they are forced to get here via more conventional means.

The earlier games had examples of how they were a pan-dimensional star empire.
>>
>>388185625
That's basically a police force. You are an equivalent of an aggressive gangsta who became the Most Wanted of a 15k town, and you are fighting the sheriff, Dr. Breen.

Big city slickers with choppers and APCs don't think you are that big of a problem to bother taking a field trip for.
>>
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I haven't given a shit about this series for over a decade at this point. So why am I so profoundly sad about this?
>>
>>388187116
Such disparity can absolutely exist and there's no better example than our own race.

Hell, we can send people, satellites, robots and other complex machinery to space and the fucking moon and yet we can't even solve basic problems from day to day.
>>
>>388187604
G-man orchestrated the entire experiment
If it wasn't the crystal, he would have looked for another way to cause a Resonance Cascade.
>>
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>>388187365
>he can't attach engines to a Dyson Sphere
Do you even SEV?
>>
>>388183686
It's less about the specific energy from the star and more what being to able to build a Dyson sphere represents, not to mention how likely it is that the sphere is one of countless others.

>>388184295
It was mentioned that "the Borealis, our most powerful weapon, would register as less than a fizzling matchhead as it blew itself apart." Allah snackbarring wouldn't send the Combine to hell, they wouldn't even notice the hit.
>>
>>388187710
Because Valve has virtually infinite money and had some of the most talented developers in the industry, and they used those things to make hats instead of this.
>>
>>388187484
I read it, it says she acquiesced and leaves, nothing more
It hurts
>>
>>388187734
So, G-Man is clearly against the Combine, possibly some other race that was taken over by them, or perhaps a future incarnation of gordon himself.
>>
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HEY HEY HEY HEY
Black Mesa Tycoon
>>
>>388187904
>G-Man is clearly against the Combine
wow, you miss the previous games there buddy? nice work Sherlock.
>>
>>388187904
Or a member of a rival galactic super-empire that's using humanity to wage some kind of proxy war.
>>
>>388187930
I've been dreaming about a game like that ever since I was kid.
>>
EE here, not that it matters, but a dyson sphere is really impractical. Whats more likely is a dyson swarm where trillions of cellphone like devices are encompassing the entire sun and each one sending a directional beam exactly at a reception point. The benefits of doing this over a sphere are mainly this.

A civilization has to be on the eve of type II before it can build a total dyson sphere. As well, technology requirements for maintaining a sphere the size of the sun would probably be a bitch. Its much easier to build a cellphone sized polarized transmitter thats duct taped to a solar panel and then mail it to the sun through a magnetic canon or whatnot. The benefit of this is the fact that we can do it right now. This allowd a civilization to "build up" on a foundation that is easy to repeat ad nauseam. A type II civilization isnt gods to us. Theyre jack shit. We could probably take on a type II with a bit of effort. Type III, where entire galaxies are harvested, like the imperium of man. Those are the scary ones.
>>
>>388187976
Are you good with spritework by any chance?
>>
>>388187904
>>388187971
I already explained this

HL universe is a simulation, g-man is one of the scientists

he's creating a conflict that has the potential to generate technology higher than that used in the host universe
>>
>>388180582
So The Combine took over the earth in 7 hours for our accidentally discovered technology to help progress them from a type 3-4 civ to hopefully a type 4-5. Which begs the question, if they're so incredibly advanced why do they have such a piddly shit army on earth after the war? The only thing I can think of that is reasonable is that they already left with all the info they needed and they are simply using the Earth at that point as a testing ground for the portal technology. Not only are they using the Earth to test it, it's not even remotely the main testing area for the tech. We're just a random run down disposable lab rat for the newly acquired tech and it doesn't matter in the slightest what happens to the planet. Humans may very well with the war on the Earth since the Combine fucked off with all the knowledge they needed. They could very well forget about humans and Earth as the last survivors of our planet slowly build back up a meager civilization that we're used to now which is why Gordon gives up. He simply wants to live out the rest of his life in peace on the small insignificant rock that is finally in the most peaceful moment he'll ever see it in again.
>>
>>388188027
I don't know anon, I feel like any civilization who is capable of building Dyson spheres would make them practical to actually use.
>>
>>388187724
>Such disparity can absolutely exist and there's no better example than our own race.

That's complete and utter horseshit. The difference in sophistication/complexity/whatever between a Dyson sphere and (for example) the Combine APC, is the difference between a nuclear weapon and a sharpened stick.

You don't reach that level of capability without also raising your awareness of scientific principles and technological progress in tons of other areas. Imagine if we knew how to build space shuttles, but hadn't invented cars yet.
>>
>>388188109
G-Man is Gabe
>>
>>388181941
Like 6 or 7 my dude
>>
>>388188120
>Which begs the question, if they're so incredibly advanced why do they have such a piddly shit army on earth after the war? The only thing I can think of that is reasonable is that they already left with all the info they needed and they are simply using the Earth at that point as a testing ground for the portal technology.

Imagnie you lead an intergalactic empire. Would you honestly use your best forces on some random ass planet with an inferior civilization?
>>
>>388186026
looking back at his dialogue in episode 2 and the theory hes a being of higher existance. He could simply be punishing humanity for messing for attempting to gain access to pandora's box, same for the combine.
>>
>>388188185
What if it's simply more economical to use lower-tech weapons and vehicles that can be built on Earth for what is essentially slave revolt pacification?

You don't drop LSD bombs on rioting niggers, you don't bust out fancy microwave/ultrasound projectors, you use cheap tear gas that's been commonplace for decades.
>>
>>388187710
It's like parents having hope that their kidnapped child will one day return home safe and then finding out a decade later they were dead. Last bit of hope being snuffed out sucks.
>>
What's the story behind Episode 3 not being made? I get that Half Life 3 needs a new engine, but why did they never get back around to making Episode 3?
>>
>>388188423
The way Valve works is people can work on whatever project they feel like and aren't forced into a single project like most devs. No one really wanted to work on Half-Life anymore for one reason or another.
>>
>>388188185
That's because you assume the Combines you face in the game are the same Combines that beat the shit out of humanity in 7 fucking hours.

That's wrong.

The combines you face are enslaved humans, enslaved aliens and a bizarre mix of machine and organic forms of life from other dimensions, all of them subdued by the combine.

Hell, the Combine Overworld might not even know (as in showing real-time interest) what's happening on Earth because they know it's a matter of time.

Just like you, you do not put cameras, armed bodyguards and alarms just because you have rat problems on your kitchen.
>>
>>388188423
No point, most likely. They practically print money with Steam. You may not like it, but you must remember: video games are first and foremost, a bussiness
>>
>>388188423
Valve's archaic work structure where each employee works on whichever project he chooses. No one wanted to lead up on the end of Ep2 and instead they went to make hats for TF2.
>>
>>388188363
>What if it's simply more economical to use lower-tech weapons and vehicles that can be built on Earth for what is essentially slave revolt pacification?

And that would be understandable if the slaves weren't capable of kicking the shit out of you with their shit tier weaponry. But in this case, they are.

To take your metaphor further, imagine if you were firing cheap tear gas at a crowd of rioting niggers, but every single one of them was carrying a gas mask. And now you're dead.

Maybe it would have been smarter to bust out the microwave guns.
>>
>>388188423
Left 4 Dead proved they could make a story-driven game while still making a multiplayer game.
Multiplayer games are just more fun to work on, so the team all moved to L4D. After the second game they got burnt out and moved on to DOTA, where they currently still are.
>>
>>388188291
I would if the planet held that much significance. They should have had that shit on absolute lock down. Earth at that point in time should have been the Combine's top priority and one of the biggest beacons int heir technological advancements. IF they're so incredibly big that they control shit on a universal scale and technology like Dyson Spheres it seems odd to abandon it that fast. Which is why I consider the possibility that with their super advanced tech they were able to very quickly realize the Earth is disposable and already have everything they needed. I guess The Combine aren't the type to keep mementos or erect monuments of their achievements. They simply get in and out. It just seems like they would have kept it under maximum security until they actually opened the portal in Episode 1 because something about the Earth in particular could have been better suited for portal technology and you'd think they'd want to discover all the possibilities and uses of the tech before fucking off from Earth.
>>
Nobody notice that the aperture science lab, Glados, the AI spheres are still there right? the borealis maybe crashed but the schematics, the portal gun and other technology are still on the old labs of aperture, technically gordon can go there to recover a lot of data, they still have a opportunity
>>
except for the striders and gunships their entire workforce is converted people or slaves no real combine
>>
>>388188557
Tf2's team is incredibly small, hardly updates, and relies on community created hats and maps. What the hell are valve doing? Is everyone working on artifact and their vr meme?
>>
>>388188763
that would of been a great prologue for HL3
>>
>>388188683
To follow up on this basically what I'm getting at is. If the Combine hasn't discovered the tech yet themselves while also being far superior to us in everything else, why in the absolute fuck would they ditch and disregard ground zero for the tech? They have no fucking clue what all goes into it. Maybe they received word from one of their headquarters that they were able to replicate the tech perfectly fine elsewhere and that Earth was of no importance anymore. If that was the case why would they be even fucking with it on earth anymore? The whole situation just seems kind of odd.
>>
>>388186319
literally from another dimension where hydrogen can likely not exist
>>
>>388185158
Do you build a crane to pick up the remote you dropped?
>>
>>388188916
They hot snuck up on. You don't hire a PMC to guard your cheese from mice while you let it out overnight to ripen. The combine basically did the equivalent of leaving out a million mousetraps instead and the mice ended up destroying all the traps and then locked all the doors to the kitchen and varricaded the windows. Would you expect that to happen from mice overnight?
>>
>>388188495

If Earth had no value, they wouldn't be bothering to call in reinforcements to hold it. The level of value is debatable, but it is greater than 0.

If you want to hold the planet, you're going to need to employ military forces. How strong should those military forces be? Overwhelmingly strong, because losing the fucking planet will reduce its value to 0 (since you no longer have it). And that's unacceptable.

Imagine if America went to war against some ooga booga jungle tribes, so we could, I don't know, establish logging camps or whatever. We come in with the tanks and the drones and kick the shit out of these savages, because they're armed with spears and bows. And as soon as the lumber mills (or logging camps, or whatever) get going, we send the tanks and helicopters and all the fancy stuff back home, and leave in place a police/military force consisting of guys armed with swords and spears, just like the natives. They have some fancy gadgets and slightly more advanced tech, but generally speaking, they're operating on the same technological level as the locals.

Pretty fucking dumb.
>>
>>388188835
L4D3 is in development, though that might be a small team
Source 2 still needs work, so a good amount of engine programmers are currently working on that
There are 3 VR games in development, though I wouldn't doubt it if 2 of them will be cancelled and we never hear from them again
And then there are the failed meme projects such as SteamOS, SteamBox, and SteamVR
>>
>>388189019
If hydrogen didn't exist in their universe, a Dyson sphere would quite literally be useless to them.
>>
>>388188835
everyone pretends to be working so they can get an easy salary, its genius really.
>>
>>388189114

No, I use the time machine that's built into my watch to go back a second to when the remote was still in my hand. Because that's the level of technological sophistication we're talking about.
>>
>>388188835
I'm talking years ago during TF2's prime. Right now they are probably working on Dota2, CSGO and some undisclosed projects.
>>
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>>388189117
>>
>>388189117
While I find your logic relatively sound and do agree with you to a point. I would say it's less of simple cheese and more of something super special. Cheese is something that can be reproduced easily, if a mouse eats it, make more. We're talking about something crazier that you shouldn't take chances on. This is a huge game changer. It'd be more like leaving the only copy of a cure to cancer just sitting out and not protecting it before securing the info and producing it. You don't just leave some shit like that randomly sitting there and say you'll get back to it later, I'll take my time, it's no big deal.
>>
>>388187362
I haven't watched this in years...it's still chilling, his voice. Especially now that we know what we know
>>
>>388189250
Right, blow a bunch of your limited resources on a problem that can be solved just by bending over and grabbing something.
If you're a galactic superpower, you probably know a thing or two about why you shouldn't apply more force than necessary for a given problem.
>>
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The most interesting aspect is that the Combine Advisors aren't even "true" Combine is there is a "true" Combine race; they're basically just biological portable hardrive for backing up the consciousness of being they deem important. If anything, that makes them creepier because they're lame-ass copies, not even the real deal.
>>
>>388189117
>Would you expect that to happen from mice overnight?

Yes. Because you're an advanced civilization, and you are completely aware that there are other alien species capable of scientific achievements, especially if you give them fucking years and years to do so. It hardly happened 'overnight.'
>>
>>388189443
>Especially now that we know what we know
Literally nothing other than he grabs alyx instead of you at the end
>>
>>388189447
>If you're a galactic superpower, you probably know a thing or two about why you shouldn't apply more force than necessary for a given problem.

And that's the problem - the Combine doesn't. That's why they lost Earth.
>>
>>388189140
I mean, things were going pretty fucking well for the Combine until Gordon showed up.
>>
>7hour war probably involved real combine but then they left and let their creations mop up the mess
>>
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>>388180582
God, I don't know whether to feel fulfilled, empty or both.
>>
>Gordon transported to the future at the end of 3
>Alyx could return soon after without any age
>Chell was in stasis and potentially came out around the same time as Gordon returned.
>Ending of Portal 2 shows lush wheat fields showing that the Earth isn't that bad off.

After the Combine got what they wanted Earth could be fine for the most part, Alyx could be reunited with her mother and Gordon.
>>
>>388189638

Yeah but Gordon didn't exactly use anything more advanced than the gravity gun or HEV suit, and those weren't even made for combat. All he did was just go around doing his own thing, and the resistance started fighting (and winning).
>>
>>388189768
Her mother is dead
>>
>>388189729
I doubt they even had a single combine there even then.
Just a portal storm most armies, don't even give them a target to shoot at. Continue destroying cities until they surrender.
>>
>This Dyson Sphere meme

then why bother invading a planet like earth?
>>
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>>388180582
>G Man discards Gordon like he's nothing after all he's been/gone through and continues on with Alyx, to fulfill his cosmic plan for his benefactors.
This hurts more, the more I think about it.
>>
>>388189973
they want our portal stuff, look upon the thread
>>
>>388189931
When did she die? She simply got kicked out into a wheat field from what I remember with no follow up information.
>>
>>388190025
>can harness the power of an entire sun
>Can't make portals tho

i guess
>>
>>388190095
>>Can't make portals tho

neither could we, it was a complete accident.
>>
>>388190081
She died at Black Mesa during the incident
http://half-life.wikia.com/wiki/Azian_Vance
>>
>>388184327
>implying the Combine have any need for manual labor or soldiers
>implying a small backwater barrack that is Earth is any indication of how Combine are actually run
>>
>>388190159
>A red letter day
>>
>>388190172
>azian
>>
I really don't feel why most people have a so high hype for HL's plot and its final game, it reads like something from the past years made in a ok game, it really shows how stagnated this kind of stories are.
>>
>>388189884
Gordon Freeman was the key force in the Combine getting pushed back a bit. A force that didn't exist for years and one one had any reason to expect to just show up. The minimal effort they put in to pacifying Earth was working fine until Freeman showed up, which isn't something you can really plan for. It wasn't the technology that the resistance used (it existed for years and made little difference), but the fact that there's suddenly a guy who can apply it in just the right way.
>>
>>388190095
They could but it took 30 minutes to send anything
>>
>>388190253
Speak for yourself, just from reading the synopsis I felt the same kind of exhiliration I always remembered from playing the games.
>>
>>388190253
here we go, it didn't take long for shitters to start popping up.
>>
>>388190253

its the end of an era, a wrap up to a lot of people's childhood.

Everyone was waiting for something, some communication, and we got it.
>>
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>>388180582
Good thread, but you guys are missing something - that the Combine doesn't have something as good as the Borealis. They still need the equivalent of warp gates to teleport, which is what they tried in. Destroying the Borealis is ultimately the smartest move because if it wasn't destroyed, the Combine wouldn't just have reason to travel across the galaxy to Earth again, but would literally have the means to enslave the entire universe, as this time they won't be slowed down by distance nor time.

Another way to think about it is that even the G-Man and his 'colleagues' are only concerned about the Borealis and not the Combine specifically. So while Earth can't in any shape or form compete with the Combine (at least for now and not counting outside influence), the reality is that the Combine have no reason to back to Earth. There would certainly be a war between the remaining Combine forces on Earth and the Resistance, and if the Resistance wins, it would be a significant victory for the time being. Let's also note that the fina lparagraph is more in reference to valve then it is for ep. 3 - as far as we're concerned, story ends with the vorts saving Freeman, and would have most likely continued with Alyx. It's quite a fantastic ending, one that doesn't need to be continued but can be.
>>
>>388183178
You know what solar panels are, right?

Imagine the biggest solar panel you could think of on Earth.

That shit is still barely collecting a fraction of a percent of what the fucking sun can give.

Now imagine the entire sun just covered with solar panels.

Literally the entire thing

Imagine how much electricity you could get from that

Now imagine using all that electricity to power some sort of ultra huge WMD like the death star's laser.
>>
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>>388183047
Am I the only person who thought of the fucking vacuum?
>>
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>>388190340
It seemed ripe for gameplay too, I can see it all in my head and hear the old source engine sound effects and then it's over, credits roll, and we sit back from the keyboard and now we can't wait for 2009 or maybe 2011, you know how Valve Timeâ„¢ can be, and we smile, waiting for another masterpiece
>>
>>388190309
>Gordon Freeman was the key force in the Combine getting pushed back a bit.

All Gordon did was
>kill some soldiers
>destroy some helicopters
>blow up some striders

It looked like the Combine were handling things fine, but that's because nobody was actively resisting them. The uprising truly began when he assaulted Nova Prospekt, and then he disappeared for a week while a shit ton of fighting happened. The only thing Gordon did was be the right man in the wrong place.

If the resistance had started fighting the day before Gordon showed up, what would the difference have been? I guess it probably would have been Barney running around saving the day.
>>
>Gordon finally gets a voice/letter after all these years
>the fight is absolutely hopeless
>but "the spirit of rebellion" persists in the remaining humans
>Gordon will keep what he saw a secret and take it to his grave, but he won't fight anymore
>he will die alone in a world he no longer knew

Jesus.
>>
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So where the fuck is Shepard?
>>
>>388190719
Hopefully teaming up with Alyx in whatever Conan-like hellhole the G-Man has cooked up for them.
>>
>>388190719
He's stuck in Non-Canon / Canon stasis
>>
>>388190719
Not canon I'm afraid.
>>
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>>388190858
>>388190897

>not canon
>which means we'll never see this cute little guy again
>>
>>388185010
i think basically they fluked for one moment into something more advanced than the combine have with the resonance cascade, which caught their attention, and at that point why not?
>>
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>>388183047
>DYSON SPHERE
>P H Y S I C I S T
>F R E E M A N
>D Y S O N
>>
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>>388190640
>>
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>>388190996
i can't handle this
>>
>>388190640
The absolute state of neo Valve.
>>
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>>388190640
>>
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>>388190640
>>
>>388188341
>being of higher existance
>unreasonable
Checks out.
>>
>>388190640
PUNISHED
U
N
I
S
H
E
D
>>
>>388180582
is this a metaphor for valve?
>>
>>388191268

The last paragraph is definitely a reference to Valve
>>
>>388191260

>Punished Freeman
>a physicist denied by his creators
>>
>>388187828
Game? Looks way to complicated for me though
>>
>>388190996
>we thought Gordon was named so because he's the one free man
>he was actually named after the symbol of the Combines absolute power

This is cruel
>>
>>388188068
>>388187976
Guys, do it. Find some motherfuckers to help
>>
>>388191647
look closer
>>
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>>388190996
SON OF A BITCH
>>
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>>388190996
DEEPEST LORE
>>
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>>388190996
>it was slated to live up to the hype
>>
>>388190996
Impressive.
>>
so what happens next?
does humanity, unknowingly, wait until the combine's empire finally reaches earth, while on their takeover of the universe thousands or millions of years later? if there's even humans still around at this point?

I wonder who started the combine, who gave birth to this being that would cause so much chaos.
>>
>>388183047
>DYSON SPHERE
Why won't resistance attack at night then?
>>
>>388192108
This is a bait.
Earth is flat.
>>
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>>388190996
Unironically deepest lore
>>
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So what exactly is Valve doing with Source 2? I feel like they just annonced it and did nothing with it. It's not even public yet for gods sake.
>>
>>388187337
>Honestly not sure how Valve would make HL3 if they ever did release ep3.
Supposedly they were planning on ending Freeman's story with Episode 3/HL3, but vere up to making more games in the universe.
>>
>>388187436
not you at least
>>
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>>388192163
then just roll the sphere off the edge

problem solved
>>
>>388192204
cards games and updating Dota and csgo's graphics most likely
>>
>>388192204
ESPORTS
S
P
O
R
T
S
>>
>>388185625
>HURRR DURRR IF EETT BLEEEDS WE CUNN KEELL EETTT
mental midget
>>
>Use gravity gun
>Throw red barrel at Dyson Sphere
>It breaks a panel and the energy goes right to your gun
>Right click and grab the combine civilization.
>Shoot them at the sun

Freeman wins
>>
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Pyro update patebin when?
>>
Literally even Square Enix, Capcom and Nintendo ohhhh I just realised what the problem is.

I was GOING to say,
>Literally even Square Enix, Capcom and Nintendo among others still make many games just because they can and they want to make a good game, among their money-grubbing escapades as well
but now I realise that Amerijews are, once again, completely at fault.
>>
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>HFYfags eternally BTFO
>>
>>388188916
What I believe is that the resonance cascade and the slaying of the Nihilanth brought Combine running, but since only a reserved few in the entire world knew the secrets to the teleportation technology, it wasn't something so easily ordained. Everyone involved with the cascade was dead or missing, and everyone at Aperture went missing or killed by Glados.

They already crushed humanity beneath their foot, they just needed to weed out and figure out if there were remaining survivors. Mossman alone helped create the teleport at Nova Prospekt presumably, which also meant that they didn't need quite as much attention to stick around if they could slowly build their process back up; Mossman trying to hook in the real researchers behind the teleportation was a bonus, and they left it in Breen's hands to show if humanity was even worth sparing under their rule altogether.

Then Gordon Freeman arrived.
>>
>>388192476
God damn it I laughed
>>
So why doesn't Gordon just destroy the dyson sphere?
>>
>>388192591
The Combine Fuck Yeah-fags beat us to it.
>>
>>388180582

>have ally that can beep boop things out of reality

not so fast, space niggers
>>
>>388188027
>type 2 civ is jack shit
*nicol-dyson beams your planet*
*accelerates relativistic kill missiles behind you*
Nothing personnel, kid.
>>
>>388192649
He's a man, not fucking beerus.
>>
>they had a perfectly good story
>didn't make a game

Why???
>>
>>388192735
ESPORTS
S
P
O
R
T
S
>>
>>388183178
Dyson sphere is pretty much the absolute possible apex of technological advancement. Any civilisation that built them is to as what we are to ants.
>>
What about the gameplay?
lore is boring tbqh
>>
>>388192072
Humanity hopes the Combine is overly bureaucratic and will say the amount of resources spent on Earth is nowhere near the return on investment, and thus let the earth go to rot.
But they're screwed if the Combine instead says "Let's destroy the earth so all our other slave planets learn a lesson not to resist"
>>
>>388192735
Because A.) read that storyline synopsis and imagine, just.. TRY to imagine the Source Engine we all know so well trying to handle the dimensional/time warps and the Dyson Sphere in any satisfactory fashion that isn't lazy effects.

And B.) Valve is literally one of the most procrastinating game companies in the entire world. They broke numerous old games of theirs in various ways and only ever bothered to fix them if they literally became unplayable, they have metric fucktons of money in a near-monopoly on the PC market as a primary distributor of most modern games, and while lots of hopefuls tried to make Episode 3, there just wasn't enough cohesion and urge to do so while everyone else was focusing on TF2 and CS:GO or other such projects.
>>
Reminder that dyson spheres are big, but they are not technologically advanced.
Without any new technology, we could construct one in a few thousand years.
>>
>I was left alone, riding the weaponized luxury liner into the heart of a Combine world. An immense light blazed. I caught a cosmic view of a brilliantly glittering Dyson sphere. The vastness of the Combine’s power, the futility of our struggle, blossomed briefly in my awareness. I saw everything. Mainly I saw how the Borealis, our most powerful weapon, would register as less than a fizzling matchhead as it blew itself apart. And what remained of me would be even less than that.

And we will never get to see this fucking GOAT scene play out in a game. FUCK YOU GABE AND FUCK YOU VALVE.
>>
>>388192819
>Dyson sphere is pretty much the absolute possible apex of technological advancement
Not at all, even within Ep3's plot, there's the Borealis which is greatly superior. The ability to travel through time makes something like a Dyson Sphere look like nothing.

>>388192895
>Without any new technology, we could construct one in a few thousand years.
Are you retarded?
>>
>>388180582
The most unrealistic part of this is that humanity could EVER have something a Dyson-capable civilization could want.

And if the Earth was somehow special enough to warrant attention, it wouldn't warrant just 'a scouting party' of attention. All or nothing, they'd probably send regular Dyson forces if Earth was even worth not just obliterating.
>>
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>>388192895
I don't think you fully grasp just how large a Dyson sphere is, anon.
>>
>>388193005
Humanity has instantaneous teleportation, something a Dyson-sphere capable civilization would really want as it would help their civilization grow even more efficiently than ever before. The Combine can use Xen as a one-way ticket, but that's not very efficient at all.

And keep in mind, it isn't just because humanity invented teleportation; the G-Man was entirely responsible for the Resonance Cascade that caused the entire series, meaning an external and unknown alien force even beyond the Combine that can cross time, space and dimensions in the blink of an eye were the ones that instigated the entire matter as well.
>>
>>388192954
Yes, thats kinda bullshit.
The only possible explanation is that Combine as a civilisation do have that kind of tech, but that particular "cell" that attacked Earth doesn't.
>>
>>388192895
We could theoretically make a dyson swarm, but not a sphere.
>>
>Half-Life games are actually Ivan the Space Biker's vodka fueled hallucinations
Think about it
>Ivan, are you drunk again?
>Fak u, all need to do is push the fucking cart! And I've seen what happened to that guy in glasses! Are you expecting me go in there sober?!
>>
>Gman can literally manipulate time and space
>fights against Combine who obviously aren't capable of this
>still needs some shitty humans
???
>>
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>>388190996
FREEMAN
>>
It's a good ending desu, you don't get a lot of defeatist endings in games
>>
>>388193148
>Humanity has instantaneous teleportation
This is the million dollar question. Why? Why does Earth have this tech that they couldn't make? To me at least this is worth speculating about.

>the G-Man
Although ultimately all the big questions get down to this, that a god-like alien race is manipulating events so really the idea of humanity or even the combine having any agency in this is moot.
>>
>>388193082
This. They're bigger than the fucking sun.
>>
>>388193262
>FREEEEEEEMAAAAAAAANNNNNNNN
>DECEIVE YOU.. HE WILL DECEIVE YOU..
>YOU ARE MAN.. HE IS NOT MAN.. FOR YOU HE WAITS.. FOR YOU
>THE TRUTH.. YOU CAN NEVER KNOW.. THE TRUTH..
>>
>>388193148
>the G-Man was entirely responsible for the Resonance Cascade that caused the entire series, meaning an external and unknown alien force even beyond the Combine that can cross time, space and dimensions in the blink of an eye were the ones that instigated the entire matter as well.

If humanity in some future mastered the tech of Black Mesa and the Borealis, they'd be gods to the Combine moreso than the Combine are to the HL humans. If they did, Gman could very well be a human from that future, unrestrained by time and space. As for why he doesn't just delete the Combine is another matter (perhaps the energy requirements make it so he can't just insta-zap every weakspot on the Dyson sphere at once).

>>388193167
That's the thing, if humanity mastered it they could wipe out the Combine in exactly 0 seconds. Because of that, the Borealis tech must be something unique, at least at the level of humanity and the Combine, higher level beings like Gman might be from some race, dimension, or future where that exists.
>>
>>388193338
I'm slowly getting the feeling that whatever the fuck G-Man is or works for is quite frankly something even beyond alien eldritch abomination at this point.
>>
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>>388190996
oh shit
>>
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>>388190996
I want to be happy but...not like this.
>>
>>388193082
Do YOU fully grasp just how long a few thousand years is?
>>
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>>388186573
He's just a Q
>>
>>388193293
I think it is good, it works and answers the questions posed throughout the series and is obviously what the author intended.

I would have done it differently, and maybe hinted at the monstrous power of the Combine before the dyson reveal (which comes across as weird or requiring further explanation) but it works.

>>388193447
>If humanity in some future mastered the tech of Black Mesa and the Borealis, they'd be gods to the Combine

I FIGURED IT OUT

THE G-MAN IS From the far future after humanity has mastered teleportation and time travel
>>
>>388190623
>All Gordon did was
I mean he was pretty much an unstoppable killing machine. And none of this would ever have happened if G-man didn't mess with things on several occasions. And who knows what else someone like him might have been doing to make this happen outside our knowledge?

The way I see it. the Combine probably just didn't see a rebellion in combination with people like Gordon doing just the right things to fuck with the Combine as a reasonable possibility.
>>
>>388193567
in a bowl of alphabet soup?
>>
>>388193148
>Humanity has instantaneous teleportation
and also FUCKING TIME TRAVEL

>you will never witness "Foreseen Consequences" flash up on the screen as the true last chapter of Half Life 3 in which Gordon goes back in time and prevents his past-self from creating the resonance cascade

I am happy for some closure but still SO FUCKING MAD FUCK FUCK FUCK
>>
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>>388190996
Why are we still here, just to suffer.
>>
>>388193343
The Sun isn't very large when you're talking on the scale of FUCKING SPACE. Also a few thousand years is a really long time.
>>
>>388193554
Pyramids are 5 thousand years old.
>>
>>388193592
>and maybe hinted at the monstrous power of the Combine before the dyson reveal
I mean, Breen is always talking about how powerful they really are, and think that they were able to conquer the entire planet in just 7 hours. I'd always assumed that the Combine were more powerful than we were shown, considering how much technology and shit they have.
>>
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>>388193630
>and also FUCKING TIME TRAVEL
Oh man I completely forgot about the slow warp from Nova Prospekt, where a week in real-time was but a moment for Gordon and Alyx. Not only was both Humanity and the Combine close to perfected teleportation but accidental time travel to boot.

All the fucking stones were there for the Borealis' hijinks.
>>
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>>388183047
>could build a dyson sphere
>couldn't figure out teleportation

The Combine are a bunch of brainlets
>>
>>388193661
The sheer amount of resources to build something as massive as a dyson sphere, it's not comparable to a pile of stacked rocks.
>>
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>>388190996
>>
>>388193554
Not even close enough for our current tech to ferry all the needed materials to the construction site. That's just the most basic limitations, there are many many others.
>>
>>388190253
Imagine if Infinite's ending wasn't the victim of a hundred plotholes, greatly-reduced gameplay and last-minute rewrites.

That level of craziness happening just a little earlier would've been quite a ride, honestly.
>>
>>388193757
They did figure it out, it was just one-way. It's probably why they expanded their empire so much, to be able to effectively transport resources for the dyson sphere and gain sufficient materials at a more plausible pace.
>>
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>>388180582
>>388184587
Why are they called the Combine anyway?
>>
>>388193757
we could build one too if we had near infinite industrial capacity
>>
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>>388193739
First thing I thought of when I read the Pastebin dude (outside of cursing a thousand years of misery on Gabe).

I had always figured they were winging the story but they clearly weren't. Fuck I'm mad.
>>
>>388193851
Read One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest
>>
>>388193851
they farm
>>
>>388193851
Because they enslave all the races they meet, combining them into a single empire. The enemies you meet in HL2 are all members of various races the Combine have enslaved to fight for them.
>>
>>388193851
It's a quick and easy term for referring to the fact that they assimilate various species and their technologies into one massive empire. Their normal name is the Universal Union, and indeed the Combine is meant to be a slur. Breen himself usually calls them by the official title and then calls them the Combine behind their backs.
>>
>>388193851
They combine other races into synths and whatever and it's also a nod to One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest.
>>
>>388193851

They combine every world into their own.
>>
How would the game convey Gordon's hopelessness at the sight of the Combine's Dyson sphere when he's a fucking mute?
>>
>>388193851
This
They should have been called gargs or yorps or something.
>>
>>388194008
You're a garg yorp
>>
>>388193992
Alyx could probably stay around a little longer to convey it to the player
>>
>>388183047
Sounds like the perfect setup for HL4 where we kick logic to the curb to make the impossible possible.
>>
>>388193992
By having the player riding the Borealis alone, abandoned, and riding the dimensional fabric until they're finally heading towards the Combine Homeworld.

Then they see the Dyson Sphere, and as you ride in closer and closer it's way, way, way, way bigger than it looked from a distance. To the point that it effectively engulfs your ship with its incomprehensible size in comparison.
>>
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>>388193657
You're not thinking big enough. A Dyson sphere isn't just the size of the Sun, it's SEVERAL TIMES LARGER THAN THE DAMN SUN. Our sun is about a trillion times larger than Earth, and the Sphere needs to be even bigger to enclose it. The Death Star ain't got shit on it.
>>
>>388193739
>slow warp from Nova Prospekt, where a week in real-time was but a moment for Gordon and Alyx
That's not really time travel in general sense though. It just took them a week to materialise.
>>
>>388194118
Death Star isn't even as big as our moon, it's almost non existent in comparison.
>>
>>388193992
Sounds really hard to portray it properly. Worst case scenario the viewer just assumes it's a not-Death Star.
>>
>>388194115
Gordon would probably be with Alix/the Resistance the whole game and this would be the first time he's alone again.

I want to cry.
>>
>>388194118

I'm pretty sure a dyson sphere is roughly around the same size of the solar system. Which is impossibly huge if you're just looking at it from the perspective of a human.

Just imagine an ant looking a the biggest football stadium, there you go.
>>
>>388193992
Maybe at some point early in the game a dyson sphere is explained to you and it'll be up to you to put two and two together
>>
>>388194237
It's actually even many times more.
>>
>>388193236
Gman is God or a very high tier Angel, he's just having fun
>>
What if Eli consciousness was copied at the end of ep2.
>>
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>>388190996
Oh, that is good.
>>
>>388192836
i don't think they bothered hashing that out
they just dropped the script behind the couch and left it there
>>
>>388193554
It would take us thousands of years, with our current tech, to ARRIVE at enough locations to mine to acquire the resources to even begin to potentially start making the Dyson sphere.

If you're making the assumption that resources aren't a concern, it would take thousands of years to ferry the stuff in to space. Not to mention properly constructing. I don't think, even with seven billion human beings all working, that we could feasibly make a Dyson sphere in thousands of years.
>>
>>388194349
I guess he's something like Ancients in Stargate or Gandalf. Immensly powerful astral being that despite being prohibited to interfere, subtly guides/helps the good guys.
>>
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>>388194284

You're probably right, I don't have a good sense of scale. But this imagine probably explains it better than I can. Using Blame! as an example.
>>
>>388194424
We could start with a ring and just add to it over generations.
>>
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>>388194349
>God
>Angel
Christian themes wouldn't fit at all in the HL universe if you ask me.
>>
>>388194524
Probably just a being that perfected the technology everyone is seeking, and thus is "ascended" on a scientific and physical level beyond comprehension of normal mortal beings.
>>
>>388194524
Pretty much.
The explanation needs to be rooted on sci-fi.
>>
>>388194524
Seriously. This is really highlighting how retarded so much of the speculation was.
>>
>>388194513
Again, you're not thinking big enough. Even a ring around the Sun would take millennia to even start building.
>>
>>388194237
Holy SHIT, what is this your 88th fucking ant analogy in this thread?? Shut the fuck up.

It doesn't even offer an accurate scale comparison. A human observing a galaxy-sized dyson sphere would be more like a MICROBE observing the planet earth.
>>
>>388194663
Don't bother anon, your post is like an ant screaming for help in a rock concert
>>
>>388194635
Just imagine if there's a misstep in the process too. Green lighting a project that could easily last more than 1000 years is beyond absurd even for most futuristic civilizations in fiction.
Also the fucking resources.
>>
>>388194663
This, and then some. Really we as humans can't come up with a good analogy for the size of a Dyson sphere. It's way too big to visualize.
>>
>this is my final epistle.
>final epistle.
>final episode.
Not end of the story.

HL3 would take place after the time jump. Just as there was a big time jump between 1 and 2.

Maybe at this point you get to confront the G-Man and save (or kill) Alyx since he clearly doesn't give a shit about Earth before taking on the Combine.
>>
>>388194663
Would have been really interesting how they would have gone about showing it in the game and actually conveying the magnitude properly.
>>
>>388185831
THE BOREALIS U MONG

DID YOU EVEN PLAY THE GAME
>>
>>388192895
Reminder that a Dyson Sphere would require more building materials than can be found in the entire solar system.
The logistics alone make it an impossible project, never mind the actual physics of building on such a retarded scale.
>>
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>Alyx grew convinced we were seeing one of the Combine’s central staging areas
THE COMBINE HAVE MORE FUCKING DYSON SPHERES HOLY FUCK
>>
>>388192256
>>
>>388194887
>"the combine's reckoning has come"
>dyson spheres
>"perhaps we misspoke too soon"
>>
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>>388187365
Stellaris doesn't really show what Kardashev 2 civilization is capable of for balance purposes.
If you build the fucking sphere in the first place then you surely have the ability to spend all that energy and let me tell you, it's not fucking 400 energy that you're capable of producing with few colonies.

Kardashev 2 is leagues ahead of almost every other civilization in the sci-fi. Fucking Imperium of Man is not Kardashev 2, though it's close just because of the numbers. Combines can have rotating habitats so numerous they can dwarf the Imperium population just in their solar system, not to mention all the slaves they have in their colonized offworlds. Humanity has no chances of destroying Kardashev 2, not to mention it can't to begin due to how decentralized everything is.
>>
>>388192895
You need a way to process the power too, anon, meaning an electrical distribution system on a solar scale.
>>
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>>388194887
>>388194930
>>
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What if this letter is just the exposition we need to know before Half-Life 3 is released

Guys...?
>>
>>388194887
And these fuckers need Earth for ANYTHING?
>>
>>388194354
>Eli is a Combine Admin now

Do Alyx and I get to ride him in the air too?
>>
>>388195092
WHAT IS THIS TWITTER ACCOUNT

HOW
>>
>>388195194
Wouldn't that imply that the protagonist for HL3 will be Alyx instead of Gordon?
>>
>>388195195
They accidentally stumbled upon more advanced teleportation during the resonance cascade, which caught their attention, as I understand it.
>>
>>388195235
Most likely it was Marc himself, possibly laying the groundwork for an ARG or something that never came to be.
>>
>>388195092
this is probably what Half-Life 3 would've started on the path of
with knowledge that the Combine were insurmountable with merely the Borealis, and all of his former allies long gone, Gordon would probably have to build up some new allies and find a way to figure out just how to circumvent the concept of the dyson sphere and hit the Combine in some fashion or another that would result in some sort of victory

Alternatively, the future Gordon ended up in was a sort of post-victory from the Combine, or at least being able to isolate itself from the Combine's clutches to some degree, and the story would go more down-to-Earth (no pun intended) like the switch from HL1 to 2.
>>
>>388195195
>>388195253
Yeah it's definitely Earth's developing teleportation tech that got their attention. Hence their interest in the Resonance Cascade and the Borealis experiment.
>>
>>388195235
Something that Laidlaw wrote ages ago. It's not technically canon.
>>
>>388193005
>EVER have something
7 billion slaves to turn into overwatch soldiers
>>
I haven't played Half-Life in years, but didn't the enemies from the first game used teleportation at some point?
>>
>>388180582
>you will never see the moment when Alyx and Gordon first see the Dyson spheres

That would have been one of the highlights of this entire means of entertainment. Fucking shoot me.
>>
>>388195195
Back to what started it all; some pissant planet in some otherwise uninhabited system (likely) in another dimension somehow stumbled across superior localized teleportation to their own. They want it. Over the course of occupation, they then find out of another project that not only covers space but also time? Earth itself is a consequence of getting that goddamn teleportation tech.
>>
Combine = Valve
Dyson Sphere = Steam
Marc Laidlaw = Gordon
Epistle 3 = Borealis

It doesn't matter how many people's faith in valve he kills, they're already too big to be stopped, and they already have too many drones to ever fade.
>>
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>>388195389
It likely would be. I don't think it wouldn't be within technical boundaries, as even the final chapter of HL2 was possible to do.

That being said, the Dyson reveal looks remarkably like what we've seen on the other side of Breen's portal.
>>
>>388195330
>>388195351
The real question is why/how was Earth able to get this tech that they couldn't? What makes Earth special.

>>388195390
If this is true then why not send regular Combine forces? Why send a paltry scouting force?
>>
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>>388186026
>The renaissance cascade
>The renaissance cascade
>The renaissance cascade
Thanks for the laugh, anon.
>>
>>388195195
Even without the technology, Earth is actually one of the more hospitable planets they have (I believe they mention civil protection being sent to inhospitable assignments as punishment IIRC).

This means it's easier/less expensive to extract resources, be it hydrogen or minerals or biomass. From a practical sense, devoting a fraction of their slave armies on it makes sense.
>>
>>388195568
>I don't think it wouldn't be within technical boundaries, as even the final chapter of HL2 was possible to do.
It's just a skybox.
>>
>>388195568
I wouldn't be surprised if what we saw within that portal was just the mere surface of the sphere, staring out into the cosmos surrounding it. Breen would've been brought in to a lesser base of operations, and just the mere portal alone would've caused cataclysmic damage considering it instantly kills Gordon upon completing.
>>
>>388193005
>The most unrealistic part of this is that humanity could EVER have something a Dyson-capable civilization could want.
2 things. First is resources, granted, if you're capable of creating a dyson sphere/swarm you know how to mine planets to begin with and Earth is not more special than Mars or any other planet in our solar system when it comes to resources, but it's still nice to mine it out.
Second is competition. While they may not perceive us as a real treat now, it's better to be safe than sorry. If you think that occupation of Earth cost them anything then you're wrong, the 7 hour war was probably too long because they sent so little amount of their troops they don't even give a shit. Still, they have to be sure that no civilization is capable of even scratching them, let alone actually competing with them in the future. Since mining is easier with slaves, they decided not to destroy us, but enslave with the help of earthlings. How many advisors are there on Earth? A dozen? Less? They are not governmental type, they are not soldiers, they are like police officers. 12 per planet is more than enough when you have trillions upon trillions of them.
>>
>>388183047
The whole ship teleporting between worlds sequence could look so good in Source 2
fucking valve what a waste
>>
>>388187116
Earth is so insignificant that they literally do not care.

They enslaved mankind, and put mankind to govern itself and it doesn't affect the Combine in any way if we fuck ourselves up.

Plus since the combine themselves never show up and you mostly fight humans, of course they won't give us technology to possibly start a rebellion against the real combine.

They just augment our technology far enough that the overseers can easily control mankind without much good opposition and that's it.
>>
>>388187337
Well, yeah, this is the ending to Episode 3, in all likelihood. Half Life 3 would have been a totally different game that ends the series, with perhaps a more happy ending. This was just another cliffhanger, part of the episodic model they abandoned.
>>
>>388195823
Where would you go from something like this?
>>
>>388195795
>Earth is so insignificant that they literally do not care.

Then they wouldn't have bothered sending for reinforcements.

Earth had value, otherwise they wouldn't have bothered to invade it in the first place.
>>
>>388195889
Bomb in the dyson exhaust vent
>>
>>388180582
Do you ever actually encounter the real Combine in the HL series? To my recollection, it's just their slaves and proxies.
>>
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>>388190996
Fuck me
>>
>>388195889
There's still a lot of unexplored territory in HL lore. G-Man being one of the central points. We don't know who he is, what he wants, what he's capable of, why he keeps meddling in Earth/Combine affairs, if there are more of him, etc.

Alyx being taken away by him instead of Gordon could be a hint that he's changing his plans, though what that change could be (apart from switching protagonists) is anyone's guess because there's simply not enough reliable information on G-Man.
>>
>>388187365
>ringworlds are 100 tiles (when an average planet has 16 or so)
>dyson spheres generate 400 energy (equivalent to the production of around half a dozen planets)
How can Paradox fuck up so badly?
>>
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I've seen things you people wouldn't believe.
Combines forces on the shores of Antarctica.
I've watched Dyson Sphere's glitter in the dark at the Combine Home world.
All those moments, will be lost......in time......like.....tears, in the rain.
>>
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>>388190996
>>
>>388195935
>Then they wouldn't have bothered sending for reinforcements.
Did they? Or were these just the ones off other slavers offworlds? The only true combines are the advisors, everything else are just things slaves came up with to control other slaves. It's all automated, they may have thousands of worlds that invent teleportation every month, they just have to make sure they put minimum pressure on them so they will not be able to create something more destructive. Just because you have resources so numerous you're capable of almost everything doesn't mean that you stop being conservative.
>>
>>388180582
The only other game series with this vibe that comes to mind is Resistance. That series' story is basically just humanity getting their shit progressively slapped harder and harder, until there's only small pockets of people remaining in hiding.
>>
>>388195935
This is the paradox here

That earth is valueable enough for a Dyson-capable civilization to occupy it, but for some reason they send the Z team.

Its either valuable enough to send the A-team, thus the game doesn't happen because all resistance would be crushed immediately in like a 1 hour war, or its deemed not valuable and just destroyed.
>>
>>388196075

Alyx might just seem more useful

Or, G-man is irritated that the vortigaunts keep interfering with his use of Gordon that it's better to simply hire a new employee
>>
>>388196138
>Did they

Yup. The entire plot of Episode 2.
>>
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>>388183047
>nothing about Andrew Shephard
why does Valve keep pretending that Opposing Force never existed
>>
>>388196118
Having realistic Dyson Spheres in the game would fuck balance sideways.

They could definitely stand to be more useful in the game because by the time you are powerful enough to build one you most likely don't actually need one anymore, but the size, resource cost and energy output would all be off the fucking scale if they wanted to make them realistic.
>>
>>388196226
Read the second sentence.
>>
>>388195889
Doesn't the Borealis also have time travelling features? That's something the Combine don't have, and if humanity has time travel, they are able to fuck up the Combine something fierce.
Time travel stories are hard to write though, so that would have been difficult to write something that makes sense.
>>
>>388195621
Thanks for the image so it can live on.
>>
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How to even destroy an empire like the size of Combine? i mean you need something bigger than this empire right ? and think about the war between 2 empires of this size.
>>
Combine literally only invaded earth because they wanted the portal tech

With it destroyed they wouldn't give a fuck anymore and would leave us be

Who cares that they have a fucking gigantic empire, in relative terms that will never be a problem for the people of earth again.
>>
>>388196281
Go back before it existed
>>
>>388193992
maybe Alex would say something like
>yo gordon dey can turn a star into a battery, we're fucked
>but at least we gon die together (goes for a kiss)
BOOM cockblockman appears and saves her
>>
>>388195935
>>388196171
They saw Earth had teleportation tech they needed, they saw it also didn't have anything of threat to them, so they assumed they could just send a small contingent, get the tech, install a puppet government on the planet, and that's it. Freeman shows up, messes up their plans badly, at which point Combines DO try to call for reinforcements, but that is stopped. Combine have, by this point, realized they need to send more, but it's too late.

This is also exactly why they want Earth's teleportation tech: If they had superior teleportation tech, humans would never have been able to stop them from sending reinforcements and they'd have the Borealis by now.
>>
>>388196289
>and would leave us be
Have you not been following literally anything with all these games? The combine takes everything, we offer them one useful thing and that's our portal tech. And without that the only use of us to them is labor. Just cyborg us up like they did with all the vortigaunts and the striders. The combine only see use, and leaving us be would be a waste.
>>
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>>388190996
WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK


NOW IM PURE MAD
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>>388196272
>makes sense

Or not make it so simplistic in a "LOL WE WIN" way. IE Gordan and Alyx travel to the birth of the Combine and whip them out before they achieve their mighty empire. It's a lazy cop-out and would have honestly diminished the story. If this letter is truly HL3's story, then I like the way it ends. A rare bad guys win ending
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>>388196251

I did. But it's a weak theory.

The Combine on Earth were trying to open a portal so reinforcements could cross through and re-enslave humanity all over again. That's a fact.

>"It'll be the Seven Hour War all over again, except this time we won't last seven minutes."

If they were just going to get a bunch of striders and dropships, then it wouldn't have been such a big deal. But it threatened to be a repeat of the invasion force that pacified Earth the first time around.

Do you really think the Seven Hour War was just an invasion by Combine grunts with submachine guns?
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>>388196289
You think they'd just take the tech and peace out? Now that they already have Earth under their control they'd strip it of all natural resources and humanity would be added to the pile of slave races.
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>>388196171
Civil Protection and Citadel Guard are NOT Z-team. They're more police and garrison than anything else.
A-team are probably fighting off some other intergalactic space federation. They found the teleportation valuable but not essential, hence the efforts made to retrieve it without pouring in resources.

That said, you have to remember this is a game. They had to limit the assets and make the game playable. The plot works around that.
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>>388196171

That's the thing though. The Z-team are just leftovers from the 7 hour war. Humanity got their shit kicked in HARD during the initial invasion. To the point where they had to surrender unconditionally and have Breen act as Earth Ambassador on their part. If nobody surrendered then they would've most likely been wiped out all together.

At that point, with the war over there's no need to keep your main forces around, you just leave some equipment behind and some left-over forces to keep things in check after that.

I just don't think the Combine expect Gordon Freeman to throw a wrench into their plans. Hence why they had to call for backup.
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>>388196281
Inner dispute among the higher ranks leading to a civil war? I don't know too much about them but such a huge empire must make some unpopular decisions that could upset a fraction of their people. Unless they're all a hivemind or something it's kinda likely to happen.
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>>388196171
Perhaps the A-team is simply too destructive. To steal the technology of an inferior species you don't send in the big guns that will just obliterate them, you send in a force that is remotely similar to them, infiltrate them, and when you get what you need. You don't milk the venom (useful for an antidote) from a spider by attacking his nest with a baseball bat and kicking it with combat boots, you take a spider gently, but forcefully, and carefully milk his venom.
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>>388196421
Why would they strip earth of resources when the asteroid belt has exponentially more?
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>>388196228
same reason they keep pretending half life never existed
>>
https://youtu.be/Jt0w9YP_wZ0
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>>388196171
There's no paradox when you have the ability to control and occupy every planet in the galaxy or multiple galaxies, but choose not to because there's no reason. They have procedures. We do not know how many worlds they occupy, but it has to be many, since they do not bother occupying Earth by themselves. Once a civ hit some kind of technological threshold they occupy it and mine it out with the help of local populace (Earth is being mined right now in HL universe by the way). Otherwise it's just a waste of resources, because you'd have to do it youself and that will cost you more than just a small war the locals will never able to win.

>>388196412
As I've said in the thread before, seven hour war is too long to begin with. Considering how many vortigaunts there are on Earth it's most likely that they used slave soldiers like them to pacify the Earth to begin with with some occasional help of several advisors. This is nothing. You don't understand the scale of what Kardashev II is. If the whole humanity had to kill 1 child with whatever means necessary he wouldn't even last a minute.
>>
>pyro update never ever
>half life confirmed dead
>artifact backlash
>playerunknowbattlegrounds gaining on dota

Could this be valve's reckoning.
>>
>>388196351
>so they assumed they could just send a small contingent, get the tech, install a puppet government on the planet, and that's it

And that's the stupid part. If your civilization is so amazingly advanced that literally nothing on Earth can stop you, then it would only take a bare fraction of your forces to keep humanity pacified. You don't withdraw and ask the local cops to keep everything tidy unless you're asking to lose control in the first place.
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>>388196274
You're welcome, my dude!
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>>388196604
Well, their good reputation just went straight to hell after slowly waning. Remember "savior of video games" and all that shit? That just became a weapon.
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>>388196403
Even with time travel, you can still make a bad ending. Even if it results in the Combine being kicked off Earth and destroying them or preventing them from ever accessing Earth again, imagine how fucked the Earth is. Stripped from resources, it's ecosystems destroyed, the atmosphere ruined, it's going to be hell for the survivors. It's up to them to pick up the pieces and try to scrape by in the ruins.
A bittersweet ending and perfect for Half Life.
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>>388190996
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>>388196628
Except it isn't, because if it weren't for Freeman the Combine wouldn't have had any problems. Saying they should account for some higher-level being unleashing his pet action hero from stasis on their ass at just the right moment is retarded, there's no way to know that is going to happen. There's also no telling that Gman wouldn't have worked things to his favour even if the Combine had left a larger force.
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>>388192895
>>388193082
>>388193554
You dumb fuck. He's absolutely right. You don't build a Dyson Sphere from scratch by shooting rocket parts into space. You build a space based manufacturing and mining operation first. And you don't build a Dyson Sphere as one giant chunk, because that's bullshit and couldn't possibly work, instead you build it as billions of individual satellites.

Lastly, once you have the first few satellites in place, you suddenly have enough energy to ramp up production by orders of magnitude.

All of this requires zero new tech, just stubborn persistence.
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>>388196628
>ask the local cops to keep everything tidy unless you're asking to lose control in the first place
They were successful!
The pacification field and ruthless police state worked wonders in keeping the general populace under an iron fist.

That is, until Freeman showed up with the help of the G-Man.
You could say the G-Man is the Combine's true adversary.
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>>388196574
>seven hour war is too long to begin with

Whether you think it's too long is irrelevant. That's how long it lasted. It was an invasion by an overwhelmingly powerful military force, and the Combine forces in Episode 2 are attempting to open a portal which would allow passage of a comparable force.

Everything I'm saying is based upon the facts presented in game. Your theory (that they just didn't care) is weak as fuck.
>>
>>388196784
>You build a space based manufacturing and mining operation first
What are you going to mine? Where are you going to mine enough for a Dyson sphere?

>And you don't build a Dyson Sphere as one giant chunk, because that's bullshit and couldn't possibly work, instead you build it as billions of individual satellites.
Doesn't change shit, you still don't have the materials for it.

>Lastly, once you have the first few satellites in place, you suddenly have enough energy to ramp up production by orders of magnitude.
How are you going to convert that energy into something useable for the building of the sphere?

Fucking hell you're stupid, at least finish highschool before attempting to talk about building fucking Dyson spheres.
>>
>>388195001
Finishing a Dyson sphere should be an insta win a la Age of Empires World wonder. Build it, protect it, win.
You can't include the power this thing provides with the game mechanics. I mean I guess you could, but whats the point of getting 400000 energy every month? That's just an instant win.
>>
>>388196604
>>388196672
For every Half-Life fan, you have 10 little kids continuing the "Le based gayben!!! LOL HL3 never ever!!" mantra, who have never touched anything but CSGO and Dota. For every Valve boycotter, you have 100 more idiots who made a steam account last year and genuinely think they're getting a great deal out of modern steam sales. It will take a lot more than this to ever release Valve's stranglehold on PC gaming.
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>>388196604
>mfw in 5 or 10 years valve is a company on the brink of bankruptcy (probably never going to happen because of steam)
>mfw the only way they can both redeem themselves and save themselves financially is by releasing episode 3
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>>388190095
Dyson spheres are a matter of resources and man power more than actual technology. Earth is valuable to the Combine in the HL universe because it has the "actual technology" bit.
>>
>>388196351
Hmm

I guess it makes sense, although the idea that they send a small occupation force is odd. This tech is fucking essential, you'd think they would go all out.

>>388196429
>its a game
True.

>>388196498
This is true but doesn't answer the resource question. Why would they need resources like water or raw materials? I don't think people fully understand what a Dyson sphere implies.

>>388196523
This I could believe, that the original combine are so hideously unsuited to Earth that they had to dispatch units which could operate in that dimension and climate, which also happened to be expensive/rare enough for them not to simply zerg with them.

>>388196574
>Once a civ hit some kind of technological threshold
Or that species has a particular use, like the Shu’ulathoi.
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>>388196771
>>388196785
> if it weren't for Freeman

Freeman killed a handful of soldiers, some dropships and helicopters, and a few striders. Mostly while he was just on the run from Point A to B. His real value was as a symbol, and his attack on Nova Prospekt was what kickstarted the attacks in the city that eventually led to the Combine blowing up the Citadel to open up a portal.

Imagine if Eli had gotten on the radio/tv/whatever and told everyone to grab a gun and start fighting. It would have been a similar scenario. The fact that the Combine couldn't foresee the uprising of the local populace doesn't speak to well to the intelligence of the advisors.
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>>388196831
I didn't say they didn't care, retard. There are 2 reason why they've invaded, I've said them here >>388195718
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>>388196784
You need to have technology to combat solar radiation, to keep the satellites in geometric order (for 100% efficiency), and to disperse the energy evenly so it does not overload the system and destroy it entirely.

We do not have the technology for this ATM. Nor will we for many hundreds of years. Thousands more until we can "preserve" to attempt anything like it.
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>>388196784
If you used up every single atom of every single planet in the solar system, you still wouldn't have even nearly enough material to build an actual Dyson Sphere.

I'll just let you think about for a while.
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>>388180582
>Alyx is now trapped by the G-man

This just hit me. She also seems more susceptible to brainwashing then Gordon. Who knows what kind of shit she's going to do now.
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>>388197041
>I didn't say they didn't care, retard

Then why are you even responding to me? I'm arguing that point with a completely different person.

Go away.
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>>388196992

>Why would they need resources like water or raw materials? I don't think people fully understand what a Dyson sphere implies.

I can't say for sure and I don't think the game really goes into that stuff either. All I can say is that probably got some sorta use for Earth's Resources. Even if it's insignificant compared to their power consumption, I suppose every bit counts. That and we really aren't show how the combine drain Earth's water either, so who know if they're using massive pumps for it and how efficient it is. It's all up for speculation.
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*destroys humanity*
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>>388190350
He's not wrong, though. This is entry-level scifi.
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>>388196980
>>388196604
Valve would be better off just focusing on making Steam better instead of still trying to be a game developer. They haven't made anything original in more than a decade.
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>>388194181
>>388194824
Having other things for comparison would help.

So earlier in the game you get a glimpse of this staging area, lets say its some massive city with dozens of citadels, a handful of big ships in the sky, and a couple moons so you know its an alien world. They establish that you can blow the whole thing by ramming the ship into a generator or something.

When you start the approach, you're coming in from space and get a good look at the whole planet. The staging area is big enough to see from orbit, and its only one of hundreds dotting the surface, and the planet itself is a megastructure. There are so many ships they look more like a swarm of bees than a fleet. With better lighting you can tell the moons are death stars, and there's more than two. Behind all that is the sphere, spewing glowey power beams in every direction. Just one is powering the "planet", the player can guess the rest are going towards many similar structures.
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>>388197039
Exactly. He was placed by the G-Man at the exact moment when tensions were highest, at the hands of friends that led him to bolster the morale of the resistance. G-Man also helped Gordon destroy the Citadel, releasing the populace from the pacification field.

>Imagine if Eli had gotten on the radio/tv/whatever and told everyone to grab a gun and start fighting
This would have never worked. Why? Because people can't believe something impossible can be done, until someone actually does it. In this case, Freeman with the help of the resistance.
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>>388197082
>what is starlifting
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pzuHxL5FD5U&t=6s
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>>388193992
By making him speak his first and last words

'I guess we truly are Half Life...'
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>>388197197
I really wish Steam would just bloop out of existence one day. Force Valve to actually put some effort in a product rather than mooching off of what others do.
>>
G-man was the bad guy.
Prove me wrong
>>
The story sounds fun but the gameplay implications don't.

>no combat until you get to the Combine stronghold
>as much as I love Combine style, I can see it getting old if you spend most of the game there
>begins with a forced stealth mission
>the Borealis phasing in and out of various locations sounds like a top tier endgame level, but with all the fuckery happening with it it's just a ship
>interesting that it's a luxury liner now and not a cargo ship

Maybe they had problems actually making a fun game around this kind of scenario, explaining at least the first delays.

>>388197214
Sounds neat.
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>hurr I came up with it in a dream years ago
The Borealis tech is literally the same shit as the "blink drive" in Dark Matter. Does Laidlaw really expect people to believe this?
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>>388197283
>Because people can't believe something impossible can be done, until someone actually does it. In this case, Freeman with the help of the resistance.

Barney could have pulled off the same shit. It was just the specific chain of events that led to
>unforeseen consequences
which resulted in the uprising happening shortly after Gordon arrived.

I mean do you really think the resistance was just sitting around, flat out refusing to do anything because Gordon Freeman (who hadn't been seen in years and might actually be dead) wasn't there? They took his appearance as a sign to start fighting, but it would be pretty ridiculous to believe shit would never have reached that point without him.
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>>388197082
You're an absolute moron. The moon alone has enough raw material to build a decent chunk already. You can also straight up just lift matter off the sun, which holds like 98% of the mass in the solar system, enough to construct dyson spheres on thousands of stars.

>>388196917
>What are you going to mine? Where are you going to mine enough for a Dyson sphere?

You and the poster above make the same mistake: Confusing surface area with volume. A Dyson Swarm barely has any width at all, it's basically a satellite with a solar collector on it, that's it, except a billion or trillion times over. Only absolute morons think a Dyson Sphere is EVER going to be an actual surface to walk around on, not only is this moronic from an engineering standpoint, but also a total waste, not to mention no possible material is strong enough for this crap.

>Doesn't change shit, you still don't have the materials for it.
We have more than enough

>How are you going to convert that energy into something useable for the building of the sphere?
Lasers are highly efficient in transferring power with current technology. Even if you are HORRIBLY innefficient, it doesn't matter when you can just keep building more until efficiency stops mattering.

>>388197070
>You need to have technology to combat solar radiation
You're implying the satellites are gonna be manned. They won't be. Also we do have radiation shielding right now. Also they don't need to be efficient at all, nor do they need to be even remotely spaced correctly, you can practically chuck them out at random and guarantee none of them will ever hit each other or something else to a degree that matters, you'll be able to build hundreds more for everyone that gets lost to random bullshit.
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>>388197312
I refuse to watch a video made by someone who pronounces "star" as "sthaaawe".
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>>388197414
Humanity vs a Dyson sphere capable society vs a society that can travel through time and space.

I hate to use this but its effectively humans vs time lords. We can never even conceive or winning.

>>388197430
Its probably an adapted script anyway, the finished version would have had a lot more intricate of go here do this sort of thing.
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>>388194663
Ant analogy > food analogy
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>>388197510
>The moon alone has enough raw material to build a decent chunk already.

You have absolutely no sense of scale.
>>
Everyone knows Freeman died when gman teleported him into an army of invaders at the end of 1.
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>>388197182
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>>388197510
>>You and the poster above make the same mistake: Confusing surface area with volume. A Dyson Swarm barely has any width at all, it's basically a satellite with a solar collector on it, that's it, except a billion or trillion times over. Only absolute morons think a Dyson Sphere is EVER going to be an actual surface to walk around on, not only is this moronic from an engineering standpoint, but also a total waste, not to mention no possible material is strong enough for this crap.
You have no idea about the logistics and MASSIVE amounts of materials involved, even if it isn't an actual sphere, don't fucking talk about engineering standpoints when you haven't even finished highschool.

t. actual engineer

>We have more than enough
No, we don't.

>Lasers are highly efficient in transferring power with current technology.
No, they are not, holy shit you have no clue at all do you?

>Even if you are HORRIBLY innefficient, it doesn't matter when you can just keep building more until efficiency stops mattering.
Again, what are you using that energy for? You still haven't answered what you intend to turn the energy into.
>>
>Combine are just humans from a parallel timeline
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>>388183047
>they have a DYSON SPHERE
Well shit.
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>>388197586
>>388197312
Oh god that really is infuriating and impossible to listen to
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>>388197587
Still does have only 3 real settings.

I'd like to see some cold climate adapted alien fauna, though. Maybe not hairy headcrabs, but something new. Maybe some abandoned arctic bases/camps to be a fun combat stage.

>>388197634
I've read the text with proper names, it was in pastebin. It also had "plane" instead of helicopter, though, so maybe it was anon's attempt.
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>>388197440
Barney was working undercover; he was more cover opts than macho man Freeman with his HEV suit. Also, he's not the one chosen by the G-Man either, who as I've stated is the main reason for the chaos in City 17.

>the resistance was just sitting around, flat out refusing to do anything
It's made clear they have had the infrastructure to combat the Combine for quite some time. However, they're usually overwhelmingly defeated or smacked away as a nuisance than a serious threat (think Ravenholm).
It wasn't until EVERYONE joined the resistance that they became a serious threat.
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So what does the G stand for anyway?
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>>388192735
Games are about gameplay, not story.
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>>388197696
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>>388197765
God.
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>>388186573
G-man is the future of humanity, as implied with the time and space travel capabilities both he and the Borealis share.
and the fact he's a human in a suit
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>>388197436
You are retarded. The dream he's referring to is Episode 3.
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>>388197765
You're moms vaGina lol
>>
>nothing about barney

That nigger is never gonna get me that beer is he.
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>>388197820
G-Man doesn't even show his true form
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>>388197430
Taking control of the Borealis could have been incredible.

>What happened next is even harder to explain. Alyx Vance, Dr. Mossman and myself sought control of the ship–its power source, its control room, its navigation center. The liner’s history proved nonlinear.

It would have been the classic half-life style black mesa level design in the interior of a ship that's phasing to different times in its history. One section would be a weird future reality, another in the past etc. and they could introduce new weapons/techs, probably even some portal gameplay mixed in.
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>>388197765
Government I think. It's just a slang name for him anyway, he's supposed to be a FBI agent stand in. Now we know he's some agent for a God-esque species.
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>>388197758
>Barney was working undercover; he was more cover opts than macho man Freeman with his HEV suit.

But we know he has the same level of ability, literally. If you want to argue that what the player achieves through gameplay is the actual skill and capability possessed by the character, Barney is pretty much a fucking clone. Just get his old uniform out of storage.

If they were just sitting around waiting for the appearance of the man who makes the impossible possible, that's pretty fucking dumb. It completely misunderstands the point of an insurgency - you don't fight the enemy on even ground, you hit where he's weakest, and withdraw before he can fully respond.
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>>388188835
TF2 never had a big team
>>388188763
We still dont know when portal 1 and 2 take place though
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>>388197640
No, YOU have no idea of scale. Do you know how much mass the moon has? Do you know how low tech you can make those solar panels and get away with them? Let people talk about this stuff that actually know what they're talking about.

>>388197671
Logistics and amounts of material are irrelevant, we're talking about "is it possible in a thousand years with current tech?" and the answer to that is a resounding yes. You're not an engineer, stop bullshitting because a few back-of-the-envelope calculations can show you that you're full of shit.

Lasers are efficient enough, but you're still thinking of dyson spheres of this scientific achievement, when they're not, they're an ENGINEERING achievement. Current satellite tech is more advanced than what you need from a scientifc standpoint.

You use the energy to ramp up production, it all comes down to energy after all. You build more factories, build more mining equipment and the whole thing just escalates. I don't think you understand what an enormous game changer it is to break the first step into space-based manufacturing where gravity does not exist and there is an absurd amount of material just casually drifting around you anywhere you look.

Asteroid and such mining isn't for bringing the materials to earth, it's to replace having to pull the materials out of a huge gravity well.
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>>388197510
The moon is much smaller than Earth. The Earth is trillions of times smaller than the sun. A Dyson sphere would have to be dozens of times larger than the sun. Is any of this going through your thick skull?
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>>388198035
We know when Portal1 happens, a little time after the Black Mesa Incident
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>that one TNG episode when they find a derelict Dyson Sphere
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Having the portal tech cross over to HL3 alone would make it an amazing experience. So many chances for great set pieces, including the ones outlined in plot.
So sad.
Remember the L4D3 leaks as well?
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>>388198076
Do you actually believe a Dyson Sphere (again, Swarm really) is going to be SOLID on the inside?
>>
Considering the kind of language G-man uses I would't be surprised if he was some sorta inter-dimensional wall-street fat cat looking to rile shit up for a quick buck.
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>>388189985
What if the GMan is the pawn of another transdimensional empire at war with the Combine?
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>>388198120
>scotty's fucking IN a teleporter
such a good episode
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>>388197989
I think you're missing the point.
Freeman is more than a man; he's a symbol. He's a free man.
Barney just doesn't have the same gravitas that the actions of Freeman do.

>guerilla warfare
This is a moot point. The resistance is and has always been about hitting the Combine in the balls. Except not. Because Civil Protection has such an iron grip on every aspect of daily life, and have readily available limitless supply of reinforcements, technology, and supplies, everything the resistance does as part of an insurgency is completely and totally ineffective. It just delays the Combine from enslaving more of the truly free men. And not the barnacles.
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>>388198120
Rewatching it now

It really does take some digging to realize just how fucked Gordon is and how powerful the Combine are.
>>
>>388198076
>>388198047
To drive home that point about back-of-the-envelope calculations.

The moon clocks in at 7.348 × 10^22 kg. The largest satellite we launched so far, TerreStar-1, comes in at 6,910 kg. So that gives us a ballpark figure of TEN QUADRILLION satellites we can manufacture from the moon alone.

As for what we use all this energy for? Do you know what a particle accelerator is? Do you know that you can practically make any element in there, albeit at absolutely horrendous efficiency levels? Yea remember how I said efficiency stops mattering when dyson swarms are involved?

So yea, what you do with all that power is make machines that would blow your mind, but aren't scientifically more complex than what we have right now, just bigger. Once you get over the initial bump, it's transmuting time and then you literally chuck rocks into the magical material producing machine that gives you what you need.
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>>388185546
This
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>>388198419
Sorry, I was actually off by 4 orders of magnitude: 10 QUINTILLION
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I kind of like that ending, any other games like this?
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>>388198216
He IS the other empire
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>>388190640
>Gman didn't pick Gordon because he was destined to be a hero
>he was nothing more than a trained mouse put in the Combine circuitry to chew on some wires and keep teleportation technology out of their hands
>With his simple task done, he's cast aside
>But not before being shown the cruel reality that no matter what humanity throws at the Combine, they're nothing more than pests in their eyes
>>
>>388198601
Not yet.
>>
>>388198419
Any sort of endeavor even tangentially related to something like that will still take hundreds of years.
>>
>>388198182
Have fun building something that has to be like 20% or even bigger than the fucking sun.
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>>388198504
Dark Corners of the Earth
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>>388198283
>I think you're missing the point.

Bud, I was the one that said Gordon was a symbol.

But because he is a symbol, he exists for no more reason than someone the resistance can rally behind. They follow his lead, and his actions are their cue to begin the uprising in earnest.

But what I am saying is that, if Gordon NEVER showed up, it would be pretty ridiculous to assume the majority of the resistance was going to stand around twiddling their thumbs, awaiting a mythical savior. Unless the vortigaunts were going around telling everyone "Hey just hold on and wait for this one faggot to show up", then we can assume they were preparing for some sort of strike at the very least. Especially since they just got their teleportation technology up and running. Meaning the Combine weren't doing a good job of holding onto the planet - allowing a sizable chunk of the populace to arm, train and organize for the day they start killing you, probably means you're pretty fucking bad at your job.
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>>388198656
>Any sort of endeavor even tangentially related to something like that will still take hundreds of years.
Sure, which is why the initial proposal of "1000 years" is right in the ballpark figure.

The cool thing about a dyson swarm is that you can just keep adding to it until you have more energy than you know what to do with, however, even at like super tiny numbers, the swarm will pay for itself very quickly already.
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>>388198625
Wrong.
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>>388198725
Mockingjay Gordon.
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>>388184949
Maybe you mean by stealing Aperture knowledge?
>>
As a released game this would have been a good downer-ending, but reading a plot summary all these years later is depressing. All that time and the fight was pointless.
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>>388198625
>The right man in the wrong place can make all the difference in the world.
>>
File: half_life-gordon_and_alyx-2.jpg (1MB, 1920x1080px) Image search: [Google]
half_life-gordon_and_alyx-2.jpg
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I forgave Valve for HL3 because of all the SFM porn they gave me.
>>
>>388197765
Gaben
>>
>>388198876
>All that time and the fight was pointless.
Just like our wait
>>
>>388198725
>if Gordon NEVER showed up, it would be pretty ridiculous to assume the majority of the resistance was going to stand around twiddling their thumbs, awaiting a mythical savior
Fair enough.
It's true that there likely would have been a sizeable uprising eventually, as the last of the resistance was head-crabbed. But with the pacification field and the citadel still in play, it wouldn't have mattered anyway.
Hell, even without either, they're still fucked because the Combine will just keep coming back.

>allowing a sizable chunk of the populace to arm, train and organize for the day they start killing you
They didn't. They stamped out openly-aggressive groups whenever they detected them.
And as I said, it doesn't matter because of how powerful the Combine in. They're pests to be handled by Civil Protection, and not an organization to challenge their rule.

However, Freeman's actions severely hampered their control and let him make his way to the Aurora. All because of the G-Man's intervention.
>>
>>388197831
gottem
>>
>GLaDOS managed to keep the Combine out of Aperture Science
>Half-Life 4 would have been about GLaDOS helping the resistance by mass producing portal guns and using whatever other crazy tech Aperture had hidden away to give humanity its last fighting chance

rip
>>
>>388198981
>no way fag
>>
>>388199226
HL4 would have been about slyx doing gordons job.
>>
>>388199226
Aperture really does need to be explained

Black Mesa got G-man for its teleportation, what the fuck did GLaDOS do?
>>
>>388199120
>Aurora
Fuck me, I meant Borealis
>>
>>388192853
Doubt the slave planets would learn about it.
>these faggots here actually made us sweat a bit, don't do that!
>>
>>388192819
Nah, there is even greater technology in fiction, for example in the Haloverse there is tech that can mass produce universal life wipers and that's not even the best tech.
>>
>>388199120
> But with the pacification field and the citadel still in play, it wouldn't have mattered anyway

Mate, the pacification field was blown up by Gordon in a conventional manner. He didn't use some esoteric piece of technology that could only be wielded by him. If I remember correctly, I think he actually used the fucking gravity gun (the thing the resistance owns).

>They didn't.

Absolute bullshit. The resistance controlled a stronghold right next to Ravenholm, a fucking missile silo in the forest, an entire underground relay system for people fleeing the city, and a godamn teleportation research lab within walking distance of the Citadel. There were enough people willing to fight that within a week the majority of the area surrounding the Citadel (the Combine stronghold on the planet) was hotly contested. Not to mention people like Barney infiltrating Civil Protection.

There is no way you can argue that the resistance was so small that it was reasonable it slipped under the radar of the Combine force. They were shit at their jobs.
>>
>>388199463
As I recall, the combine can't get reinforcements on earth, as they lack the teleporter technology or something. That's also what they want from us.

So it's entirely possible that earth got conquered by a tiny army and they can't be everywhere at once. Sort of like how you could squash an ant in your fingers, but if you jump into the right anthill, you'll still die.
>>
>>388197821
Nice projection and reading comprehension.
>>
>>388199327
What do you mean?

It's kind of the joke of Portal that Aperture is good at doing really intelligent things in the dumbest way possible. They're much better at creating advanced technology than Black Mesa ever was (most of Black Mesa's inventions were stolen from Aperture, like the turrets), they're just so incompetent that they have absolutely no idea what to do with it or how to use it effectively. They invented super advanced portal technology in the 1950's and what did Cave Johnson think it was useful for? Shower curtains.

There's probably technology stashed away in forgotten corners of the Aperture Science facility that would even seem advanced to the Combine. If the resistance could get GLaDOS on their side they'd definitely stand a chance.
>>
>>388190996
WHAT
>>
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>>388199561

>another fucking ant analogy
>>
>>388199561
>So it's entirely possible that earth got conquered by a tiny army and they can't be everywhere at once

Sure. But then maybe they shouldn't have invaded a planet when they're severely outnumbered.

Like, build some fucking robots to supplement your regulars or something.
>>
>>388195619
>What makes Earth special.
Gman
>>
>>388195249
A black female as a protag? Wouldn't work..
>>
>>388199692
>Like, build some fucking robots to supplement your regulars or something.
Isn't that literally what they're doing?
>>
>>388199463
>I think he actually used the fucking gravity gun
He had to get past Citadel Guard first. And the entire Citadel itself.
Freeman makes it look easy as shit, but it would have taken the entire resistance to pull it off, with nothing left afterward.
They would have never assaulted that place. It's too big and it would be too costly to take it, considering any war of attrition they would instantly lose (unless they had every human on City 17).

>a fucking missile silo in the forest, an entire underground relay system for people fleeing the city, and a godamn teleportation research lab within walking distance of the Citadel
All of these held no immediate threat to their authority.
The silo was deactivated, the relay system was harmless and an inconvenience with constant patrols and checkpoints to monitor any and all traffic.
And the laboratory? Well, that one is up to perspective. It could they were bad at detecting gravitational anomalies, or Kleiner was just really good at covering his tracks.

In any case, I'd love to keep up this discussion but I need to go. Sorry! It was a nice conversation, so thanks.
>>
>>388199830

Were they? I remember the stupid camera drones and the electric mine things.
>>
>>388199872
>Freeman makes it look easy as shit

And Barney could have done it too.

>All of these held no immediate threat to their authority.

Absolute horseshit logic. You don't allow your enemy a place to rest, rearm, supply and organize just because it's not an 'immediate threat.' It becomes a threat BECAUSE you allowed him to occupy that territory.

By your logic, the resistance would have had to start tearing down the walls of the Citadel before they became an "immediate" threat.
>>
>>388199875
I mean they make those android corpse soldiers and god knows what else, but many things look like it's just earth technology that got repurposed and enhanced, like the helicopters.

Makes me think that we rarely have seen actual combine tech in its pure form.
>>
>>388200036
>I mean they make those android corpse soldiers

The stalkers? I thought those were human corpses repurposed for menial labor.

Not really robots or any type of combat unit.
>>
>>388200134
Uhh weren't normal combines also kind of, not human anymore?
>>
>>388200134
Stalkers aren't corpses, they just had so many "unnecessary" parts stripped out that they might as well be.
>>
>>388192873
>TRY to imagine the Source Engine we all know so well trying to handle the dimensional/time warp
Actually, titanfall 2 -somehow- managed to be built on the source engine, and there was a level in titanfall 2 wherin you would instantly transport between different timelines at will.
It was really quite impressive.
>>
>>388199993
>You don't allow your enemy a place to rest, rearm, supply and organize
Command centers only work if they have people to command. To the Combine, their threat was so insignificant, they dedicated resources to routing out cells within the city rather than outside of it.

Considering they didn't think the Citadel would fall, it was an appropriate priority based on their system of government (police state). Grave mistake, but not unreasonable tactics in hindsight.
>>
>>388194887
Holy fuck. Humanity really has no chance.
>>
>>388200364
>Command centers only work if they have people to command

And they did. Magnusson and Kleiner didn't get an entire missile silo up and running by themselves.

>To the Combine, their threat was so insignificant, they dedicated resources to routing out cells within the city rather than outside of it

And they didn't do that very well either. Otherwise the forces within the city wouldn't have been able to be aggressive as they were.
>>
>>388184327
god i wish that were me
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DX21AjqfOIo
anti fatigue ration is now
six
miligrams
>>
>>388197765
Gordan of course.
The story tells us that gordan's been transported to a research facility thousands of years later. With the new tech developed by others and having seen the borealis, he would most likely set out to replicate the technology.
Chances are it takes him many years hence g-man's advanced age.
His first task is to get himself to the point in the future where he can develop the technology and to prevent the combine from discovering the technology themselves. Next, he will help Alex to defeat the combine.
>>
>>388199575
you're the one with terrible reading comprehension
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