kirby just absorbed you what power does he gain?

virgin powers

The power of bipolar and self loathing

power of double jointed thumbs

The power to masturbate in public areas

depression and anxiety

Sleep but it lasts for 12 hours.

>>386307382
cancer

He doesn't gain a power. I'm just an average guy, so it would be the equivalent of swallowing a regular Waddle Dee.

>>386307382
the unending feeling of failure and desire to kill himself

>>386307382
the power to solve tripe integrals

File: 1488487122202 - Copy (5).jpg (15KB, 212x212px) Image search: [Google]

15KB, 212x212px

>>386307612
>>386307521

>>386307908
Oh yeah?
Solve THIS!
X^(x^(2))

>>386307612

http://www.theonion.com/article/gaunt-sickly-kirby-takes-leave-absence-video-games-56385

>>386307382
being better than his team in team games
it's always their fault if he loses

>>386307382
the power of Dex, which is far greater then the power of strength

>>386308119
this article cracks me up. Who the fuck sits around and writes this shit?

>>386308103
give me some bounds and i'll do it boi

>>386307382

nothing. i'm one of those enemies. nothing special about me.

He becomes a disappointment.

he becomes fat and insecure

No different than those fire enemies. My body can't produce sweat correctly, so I need to be careful when doing anything during the summer or while I'm exercising

big penis

the power of loneliness.

Autism

blindness

>>386307382
A variety of diagnosed mental disorders.

>Major Depressive Disorder.
>Borderline Personality Disorder.
>Antisocial Personality Disorder.

I got two more, but I won't list them 'cause they're not an issue.

File: hand.gif (1022KB, 400x228px) Image search: [Google]

1022KB, 400x228px

>>386307382
sexual degeneracy and the ability to do this

>>386307382
MIKE KIRBY

I'm a singer :(

>>386307382
unbridled rage at everything. Also the mic ability

>>386307382
Back problems and premature ejaculation

>>386307382
The power of thinking he's better than everbody else

The power to give better blowjobs than I receive.

Chad Kirby

Crippling self doubt and a porn addiction. ;_;

PhD in chemical engineering and a porn addiction

>>386307382
Intense misogynistic outlook.
Not really useful considering the women in the Kirby franchise can be counted with one hand.

>>386307382
Le depression XDDD

autism

He's now real good at guitar hero

>>386307382
The power of good taste
:^)

>>386308415
Squrt-1 to grams nunber

Good luck

File: 1462923124455.png (89KB, 229x312px) Image search: [Google]

89KB, 229x312px

the power of cross dressing occasionally.

>>386307521
This

>>386307382
He becomes evil.

>>386307382
Diarrhea, fatigue, and bad teeth

>>386307382
Suicidal depression

Forgetfulness

>>386307382
Make female enemies flee.

>>386307382
the power of sloth

He gains a diaper fetish.

File: Laserheart.jpg (94KB, 1440x788px) Image search: [Google]

94KB, 1440x788px

>>386307382
THE POWER OF OPTIMISM!!

>>386320219
post pics

literal aspergers
also clinical depression and general anxiety disorder
kirby wouldn't be fun anymore

a 6'1" height, a 7" dick, a few dozen pounds that he's ashamed of having, and terrible shyness

that's pretty much it

Procrastination

>>386307382
the ability to play the accordion decently

fap x2

type 1 diabetes
sorry kirby

>>386312717
Jesus Christ that is freaky. How does one even gain the ability to do that?

Racism and autism

>>386325667
Hey, me too.

>>386325660
fucked up connective tissue

The ability of having to whipe far too much. Like you have a sharpie sticking out of your ass

>>386307382
Late-stage depression and the ability to masturbate 4 times in a row without needing to rest.

>>386323628
>baby Kirby was almost a thing.

Y'know some times I'm glad Kirby isn't super popular so there's very little autistic art.

File: 1497998259142.jpg (9KB, 225x225px) Image search: [Google]

9KB, 225x225px

alcoholism

>>386307382
he gains multiple firearms

File: IMG_20170201_055131~01.jpg (432KB, 1080x1920px) Image search: [Google]

432KB, 1080x1920px

>>386307382
Moustache.

>>386327331
cringe

right patellofemoral dysfunction
kirby fuckingnloses health after running for too long