>push to talk >coughs

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>noise gate
>constant mouse-clicking

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>Open ENGLISH text chat channel
>Every language except English is typed

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>Gets a mic
>still types

is this the steam gay dating thread

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>Faggots that use vox or an open mic that got caught up in the mechanical keyboard meme

>>386055791
>push to talk
>rips a giant fart into the mic in the dead of silence

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>[game quote] [game name] thread

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>push to talk
>braps

>>386055791
Thats me.
Its for breaking the ice

>>386056717
>wonders why girls won't kiss him when he has shit flakes on his lips

>complain guy's mic is too loud
>cranks the gain to maximum, gets really close and starts smacking and licking his lips
uh

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>>386056717
I do that all the goddamn time. It always gets people talking.

>friend says he's going to get something to eat
>comes back
>chews it right into the microphone loudly
>he uses push to talk
>ask him to stop
>turns his volume up
t-thanks

>>386056839

you mean muting?

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>south american shows up
>can hear chickens in the background

Why do you people always have chickens in your house

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>push to talk
>only push to laugh when something funny happens
>people ask me what my problem is

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>push to talk
>lewd moaning

>>386056737
don't forget the image is also from the game. I hate people that do this. You posted a quote and an image. the game you're talking about is obvious.

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>push to talk
>intergrated laptop mic

>>386057367

>mic auto-on
>moist slapping noises

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>>386057254
>american shows up
>can hear his father beating his mother in the background

Why do you people always have dysfunctional families

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>Talking to FC over mic
>Feel a sneeze come on
>Just let go of the push to talk button mid sentence
>Start sneezing up a storm
>"Uh, anon, I think your mic cut out."
>Press button, say "Hold on!" but sound all strained, squeaky and distresses
>"What? Are you okay man?"
>Reply with "I'm fine" again all choked up
>"DUDE WHATS GOING ON?!"
>"One sec!" sounding like I'm being choked
>Finally compose myself
>Everyone trying to figure out what's going on, like I'm being attacked or something
>Just go back to finishing what I was talking about
>Never even address what happened, when someone asks about it just say "Oh, that? Don't worry about it."

Its an utter mystery to everyone in my FC. It even comes up every once in a while. The best theory is that I live in a dangerous part of town and I'm attacked with my back turned so often that I'm just nonchalant about it now. It's fun.

Thanks for reading!

>>386057169
No. That's not even close to what I typed out. Try reading it again.

>>386057367
>make hentai faces
>completely ugly without them

>>386057552
Don't deflect, why do you fuckers seem to all live with chickens?

>>386057495
Why do so many people masturbate into the mic?

>push to talk
>foreign accent

>invited to a discord
>channel names are really weird
>one of the first lines i see is "get back in here you fucking nigger"
>leave in disgust

>>386056838
AYOOO HOL UP WHO PULL THE BOSS

>>386055791
>push to talk
>funny noise

>>386057978

that was incredibly brave and courageous of you, you did the right thing!

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>push to talk
>can hear their dad beating mom in the the background

>>386057978
you do you, sometimes hanging out with the lowest common denominator gets grating

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> on discord with mates
> leave mic on so everyone hears her call me a sweetheart when she gets home
never gets old

>>386057978
>invited to a discord by a group i met in overwatch
>everyone's in a channel called "retarded blizzard games"
>one person sitting in a voice channel on his own
>the channel is labeled "stupid nigger prison"
>the channel is locked
>text chat is nothing but ghetto memes and words where every vowel is replaced with the B emoji
>join the "retarded blizzard games" channel
>there's a bot playing a youtube video loudly
>all i get to hear is people saying "oh there he is" and "who the fuck is that" before the bot blasts my eardrums with "make sure that shit BONELESS"
>leave

>>386057552
that sounds like south america again.

>>386057978
well done gentleman!!
EDIT: upvoted!

>>386058403
Your mom or your sister?

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>Find out if someone has a really good set of headphones
>Sit on the information for a while
>Randomly a week or so later, interrupt them when they are talking and say 'The hell is that noise on your end? Sounds like someone's tapping on the window.'
>Quiet for a second. Just know they are looking over their shoulder
>"Nevermind, it's gone now. Anyway what were you saying?"

They are never the same afterwards when wearing their headphones. It's fun.

>>386055791
>guy asks me a question
>push to talk - nod
>wtf did I just do

>join american discord
>everyone loudly eating and chewing with their mouths open
>rap music and babies crying in the background
>everyone keeps saying "yall" and "nigga"
>someone loudly shits themselves and everyone laughs

fuck me that was some serious culture shock

>leave mic on
>mom likes to pull pranks so whenever I offer her the chance to fuck with people online, she joins in immediately
>either Ipretend to be a stereotypical tendie manchild and loudly berate her on mic for not bringing me my food
>or she plays the role of abusive mother and screams at me for being a waste of space and tells me I should end my life
the reactions are priceless
we always laugh about it, afterwards

>>386058404
>invited to a discord by a 4stack i met in hots
>there are two voice channels, "AFK" and "only dumb retards get in this channel"
>text chat is filled with hundreds of different variations of that jew caricature, all posted by one guy
>there are so many i get tired of scrolling it up
>join the voice channel and say hello
>OY VEY SCHLOMO WHO'S THAT IS HE A GERMAN
>uh what
>OY GEVALT THAT IS A GERMAN ACCENT SOUND THE ALARM
>one of them begins loudly imitating an air raid siren
>leave in confusion

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>>386058794
>tfw often point at the screen or gesture with my mouse when talking to someone over mic and get frustrated that they have no clue what I'm talking about before I realize what's happening.

This happens more than I'd like to admit.

>>386058794
I often give thumbs ups and do hand signals when chatting with someone online, or accidentally think for a second that they can read my face.

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>voice activation
>fart loudly
>"what the fuck was that?"

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>>386058908
You've been found out Goldberg.

>>386058991
>>386059070
>playing game
>walk up to other guys character and face him before talking

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>>386058908

>>386057552
BRs get mad as fuck

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>>386059303

>>386059370
That's just a sign of good immersion. Nothing wrong with that.

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>Have one of those friends that get way too detailed with their stories so they draaaag out
>Try to listen, but always end up zoning out and replying with 'Mm-hm' any time there's a pause
>Come back to reality when they say "So what do you think I should do?"
>"Uh.. well, I don't know. Have you tried anything yet?"
>They go off into another long rant

Maybe I need to start taking Ritalin or something. I don't know how often I'm going to be able to get off with that line.

>PTT
>BURRRRRRRRRP

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>push to talk
>cums

>>386059370
I don't usually walk over to the other character but I almost always look towards them when talking to them.

If their avatar is really far away I tend to talk a little louder.

>>386057775
Ahegao, dumb newfag

>*bong rips*

>>386057367
thanks anon this broke my nofap you fuck

>>386059778
She's still ugly, you silly faggot

>>386055791
>in channel with scotish guy
>perfect coherent english
>other scotish guy joins
>moan nen ye bastart all floosh yer eed doon de clodgy throw shite at the mun

>>386055791
>push to talk
>cop sirens sounds
>shots
>"AYO HOL UP NIGGA"
>shots again

>>386058991
>>386058794
>push to talk
>someone walks into my room IRL
>PTT when talking to them

>>386060039
>european group with one american
>other american shows up
>american #1 immediately attempts to assert dominance
>american #2 does not give way
>every time they're both on all they do is try to one-up eachother

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>Talking to a friend that has a wireless headset
>Hear water on water
>"God damn it, are you in the bathroom?"
>"Yeah, keep talking."
>"NO DUDE I don't want to talk to you when you're using the bathroom."
>"It's cool, I don't care."
>"I DO"
>"Anyway you were saying.."

Once I tried telling him it's because I have a watersports fetish and it was weird with him but he called my bluff.

>>386060328
it's like when another girl joins to the same group

>>386060328
>Americans are convinced they are alpha males
>Everyone else laughs at them behind their backs
Seems realistic desu.

>>386060039
>>386060328
>be Dutch inn English gaming community
>alone in channel with other Dutch guy
>speak English
>wtf are we doing

>>386060394
>getting flustered because you have a watersports fetish
That's really cute.

>>386060615
i actually prefer speaking english to my native language

>push to talk
>people hear my wife getting blacked while i play call of duty

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>>386060394
>on mic with friend
>he loud farting

>>386060698
I'm Dutch and I sometimes play with this Belgian dude. He can understand me perfectly but I can't make sense of a word he says so we have to speak English

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>dude says he's going to take a shit
>disconnects from discord
>reconnects a minute later
>FRRRRRRRT BLOOP

>>386055791
>On TS with friend
>his sister walks in and tells him to keep it down
>he shushes me when I speak because his sister will get pissed

wtf man

>>386058895
anon...

>>386058895
haha

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>Just start actually using my mic in World of Warcraft
>Used to only "yes" or "no" or tell the off tank when to grab aggro
>Things aren't going well in the raid and everyone is starting to bicker among themselves
>Our stupid and inefficient guild master is the one starting the bickering.
>I never speak unless shit is hitting the fan, and even then, only in short worded bursts
>Tell everyone to calm down, shut up, do as I say, and we'll kill this boss
>I never speak this much, 5 of the 25 in the raid asked who was speaking,
>They finally figured out it was me, someone said "damn daddy, that voice is deep. Hot"
>Everyone laughs and we go for another attempt. We kill the boss
>The name "daddy" stuck. My deep voice made me sound older according to them even though I told them I was 17 (at the time)
>Now every time we kept dying to a boss, someone would chime in and ask "what does daddy think we should do?"
>GM's girlfriend got drunk one night and started coming onto me "Will you be my daddy?"
>GM kicked me from guild
>95% of the core raider team left the guild and we formed out own because once again, according to them, "daddy always knows best"

It's an abstract kind of feel.

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>>386055791
>shrill little underage retard gets on the mic
>they're on your team

>>386059967
Not as ugly as me.

>>386060394
Used to play with this French guy who had a wireless headset. He used to go take a piss and we'd all hear splishy splash sploosh while he was singing in French

>>386061352
>ita another "i left the guild and everyone came with me" WoW story
Sure bud

>>386061561
k

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>>386055791

>Push to talk
>laughs

>>386057254
because chickens are way better pets than dogs or cats

>>386061352
>Just start actually using my mic in World of Warcraft
>quit after a week because it's a shitty game and I'm not a normalfag
>learn not to capitalize greentext like a redditor

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>push to talk
>loud snorts and heavy breathing

>>386055791

>push to talk
>AAAAAAAAND BADA BING BADA BOOM

>>386056492
It's not a meme but I fucking HATE the sounds of them on open mics.

How do you get rid of your stupid accent guys?

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>Voice-activation
>Industrial fan blowing into mic at all times

>>386061916
>someone else in the server chimes in
>"ashes"

>>386061352
hey daddy

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>Dead quiet, everyone concentrating on the fight.
>Can hear someone's cat start meowing in the distance

>>386061960
Where are you from?

>>386061767
Hey, WoW was great when I started playing. BC and WotLK were well worth the play time. I stopped playing when me and my guild managed to 25 man heroic clear Cataclysm raids too easily. And capitalizing the first letter of sentences is habit for me. Don't know what reddit has to do with any of this?

>forced voice chat because it will somehow scare off the cheater in the match
>cheater plays https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-9UaawN_-vg at full blast
fucking l4d2

>>386062089
no please I beg of you.

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>>386061392

>Underage angsty little squeak-turd on your team
>Literally NEVER shut the fuck up
>
>
>
>TK him opportunistically

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>push to talk
>talks

>>386062179
>Hey, WoW was great when I started playing
WoW was shittier than literally every single other MMO on the market. Blizzard has not once ever made a good game, they make a good product for office workers and their ham-sweat wife to shit around in because both are too casual to play alternatives.

>>386055929
I have learned atleast 15 russian words thanks to dota 2.

>push to talk
>"Hey everybody it's your boy BlasphamousHD here with another video, today we're gonna be playing-"
No joke, I ran into whoever the fuck that is during the Friday the 13th beta and he just kept doing commentary.

>>386062667
That fag plays Overwatch too and spams his twitch constantly, I've seen him twice.

He gets around a lot I'll give him that.

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>>386061992
>Blaringly loud a/c in background
>Tell them to turn it off
>Get told to lower my volume

>friend says he'll be right back
>turns off mic
>game decides to use his laptop mic instead
>everyone in lobby hears him squirt out some lotion and start jerking off

>>386062971
>Friend has a snowball desk mic
>It's a shitty Chinese knock off hooked up to an even shittier PC
>CONSTANT feedback and static noise whenever he goes to talk, and he doesn't use PTT
>So much it's impossible to hear what he's saying
>He gets all pissy because me and my group stop inviting him to play Overwatch because his Mic is so distracting.

I bought the fucker a $40 Corsair HS40 headset for his birthday. He hasn't used his FUCKING SNOWBALL MIC since

>>386057367
This is the type of girl that's only attractive to /v/tards and autists.

>>386063009
Should have just called him spanks all the time.

>>386061352
Humble bragging the post

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>push to talk
>stutter
>"who the fuck stuttered"

>push to talk
>chewing gum, using a mechanical keyboard and occasionally coughing
>not saying a fucking thing

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>>386055791

>have mic
>pretend i don't

>>386064360
Everyone knows you're just too shy.

>>386064360
>have mic
>can't be bothered to connect it
>easier to pretend I don't

>>386059632
Just tell them to be more concise and to the point.. If they are your friends they will understand.

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>>386061352
Kill yourself degenerate
https://derpibooru.org/1047872

>>386065638
based

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>the guy that plays hentai scenes over the mic

>>386064540

I'm mostly trying to hide my outrageous French accent.

>>386065987
hehehe hohoho how I love les poissons

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>someone joins server/chatroom
>"howdy"

>>386056838
He's trying to calm you down with an impromptu ASMR session.

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>push to talk
>take a huge bong rip

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>>386066823
>never thought people really do this often but I mostly play singleplayer so don't know
>try my friends PUBG
>first guy who fucking speaks rips bong

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>>386065987
>person says anything in french
>cant help but make fun of them

sorry lad, its our duty to the queen

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>>386066616
let me be