>Turn on your mic anon

>turn on mic
>talk normally
Feels good not being so socially retarded that I become delusional and pretend I'm the opposite sex out of desperation.

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>Anon, your dog must be sitting too close. Everytime we ask you a question we only hear barking.

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>I... i have no mic
>Cmon dude, they are cheap as hell!
>yeah... it just broke
Ez.

>>385857583
>be not english
>"turn on mic anon"
>can write and read properly but get nervous while speaking and talk like a retard in english
>Have difficulty understanding some people

someone kys myself

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http://www.strawpoll.me/13597074

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>>385857960
>someone kys myself
Are you fucking dumb?

>>385857886
>I don't do mic.

Why lie?

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>>385857716
Anon it's not fun talking on a mic when you are still training your voice

I don't use mics for the same reason why I don't like talking to people on the phone. It's awkward talking to someone without seeing their face.

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>>385857583

>Dude randomly adds me on Xbox live the other day
>Before I accept his request I get a message from him saying "hi"
>Reply "do I know you?"
>He replies "hahah just found u randomly and wanted sum1 to talk 2"
>He immediately sends a message after this saying "how old r u"
>Go and block him immediately

Why do people do this. My initial thoughts where a scam but surely normies aren't this try hard sociable.

>Inb4 ur a normie becus Xbox

I have a pc that I mainly play on but unfortunately Xbox is the only gaming platform my friends will play on.

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>>385857960
>can write and read properly but get nervous while speaking and talk like a retard in english
>Have difficulty understanding some people
Fuck this.
Worst part is that people eventually thinks you are selectivey ignoring them since they are aware you can type and read well, but suddenly have difficulty speaking or listening.

>nty i'm a leaf
Problem solved
Votekick Anon from the server? F1 Yes / F2 No

>>385858572
I'm pressing F1 but nothing is happening

>>385858469
Bind people don't have a problem doing it.

>>385857991
>those results
I'm fine with that
it needs a "I'm okay if it's femenine"

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>>385857583
>Have a really good mic for work
>Can rarely use it since I still live with family

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>Have a mic and make clear and accurate call outs
>No one else on the team is using a mic or listening to my call outs.
Fuck all of you.

>Work up the courage to join the Curse session
>Nobody is actually there

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>>385857767
are there dogs on the internet?
i always thought it was just a meme but with neuroscience and AI research it could be possible

>>385857960
>lived in english-speaking environment whole life
>discord shitposting has given me worse grammar than my esl friends
What the fuck is a comma splice? I used to know.

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>>385857767
>that dog voice setting in morphvox

>>385857991
>option 5 is winning
Is /v/ salvageable?

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>Daytime
>Connect to server
>Russian teenager screaming

>>385860609
>USA black project genemods dogs into beings of comparable intelligence to us
>They shitpost on the internet

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>>385857583
>i'm deaf

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>"Your Brittish! haha that's so strange!"

>have reputation as autistic mute
>can't break it by getting a mic

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>>385861707
>I'm mute

>wow you sound just like [shitty eceleb]

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>ANON TURN ON MIIC
>NO

how is that hard i dont fucking get it

>say something into mic
>LOL DUDE WHATS THAT ACCENT
the amount of people who have never heard a New England accent baffles me

>>385862736
they let you play online games in prison Sam?

>>385858328
This is a guy btw. I found out after jacking it to a bunch of their pics.

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>>385862249
>ANON TURN ON MIC!
>NO!
>You have been banned from the server

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>wow anon you sound so cute!

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>>385858328
What the fuck are you talking about?

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everytime I use my mic I make sure this is playing ever so quietly in the background
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IHknoSQZibU

>Finally submit and start using mic
>No longer playing because I'm busy ranting about random shit
This is how terrible podcasts and radio shows start.

>>385861484
What else would you expect from a species that inbreeds and eats their own vomit?

>>385858481

It was a scam. Had the exact same message sent to me a week ago. Thought it was some aspie, but now i know its a scam since you had same message

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>>385862736
tfw highland scot
tfw people ask where i'm from because the only scottish accent they know is lowland/glaswegen accents

>>385858481
These have been going around to everyone, Xbox has been getting a lot of bots like that in the past couple months. It started off with fake accounts that go around liking random things you record and upload.

>turn on mic
>talk
>"Are you a girl or a boy?"
>Any answer leads to them arguing

>>385857960
I feel this. I also have a thick Engrish accent so nobody can understand me anyways.

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>>385862249
>ANON TURN ON MIC
>turn on mic and say no

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>>385857767

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>"Turn on your mic"
>Turn on mic
>Blast shitty music

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>have a thick spic accent
>girl playing Mercy tells me to speak up
>say "Ok ok I'm talking now"
>"What a nice accent" she says
>get scared
>leave the match
>block the girl
>cry myself to sleep
This happened a week ago, I'm still recovering

what's wrong with not using a mic and just playing?

>lives with his family
>still spends a lot of time talking over the pic or using the mic during midnight
I seriously hope NO ONE here does this.

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>>385866352
How could you have royally fucked up this hard anon? My disappointment knows no bound.

>>385866427
Nothing depending on the game. If its a team based game and its imperative that we communicate like Siege, then fuck you.

>>385862736

what baffles me more is how these simpletons think an accent or dialect is something amusing and worth starting a conversation over

just focus on the fucking match you morons, it's like these people never heard another human being speaking beyond their isolated shit hole.

>>385866352
Just assume that every female you hear is actually a man with a voice changer.

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>>385862736
>"where are you from anon?"
>texas
>"WHAT? YOU DONT HAVE A REDNECK ACCENT AT ALL"
every time

>>385867567
do foreigners say that to you or your own countrymen?

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>>385862736
>talk with brit
>everything normal
>talk with frog
>everything normal
>talk with another american
>lol dude are you british
>lol dude are you french
I've never left the US east coast I just don't know what these people are thinking

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>blissful quiet

>>385867662
Both.

unless by "countrymen" you mean other Texans, then we just talk about how shit the weather is.

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>>385867567
>"Where are you from anon?"
>mfw I'm from Brazil

>tfw I live in notCanada but have a Canadian accent
People always think I'm British, just because I say outside "ootside" and about "aboot."

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>turn on mic
>hear myself echo through someone else's mic

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>>385868113
Every goddamn time.

>comply
>utter a single "hello"
>hear over their hot mics calling the police

>>385868113
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1rAN-fIcco8
That's what earrape micspam is for.

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>>385867328
It's small talk; normal people regularly employ small talk to attempt to initiate a conversation. This method of communication with a new acquaintence is often successful when the target interlocutor doesn't have Aspergers.

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>>385857583
>Teammate open his mic
>It's a fucking kid

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>use mic on EU servers
>incomprehensible gibberish response from eastern euro
>use mic on NA servers
>everyone bullies me for not having murican accent
It's not fair I just want to speak to other people who speak English

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>whole team talking in different language
>they speak to me because I can hear them say my name
>ask them if they speak english
>they reply with "Fuck you"

I hate eastern Europeans,is english that hard for them?

>>385861860
This. It'd be too weird if it happened at this point

>>385867928
Does "barbeiro" actually mean bad driver? Someone told me it did, and that's how I used it when I tried to speak Portuguese.

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>>385868430
>mfw he's pretty funny

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>>385866870
I can't into talking to girls anon. It's just not easy

>>385862860
n-name?

>>385869019
Yes. Because he cuts in. If that makes sense

>>385869358
Oh, yeah that makes sense. Is it really as general as "bad driver", or does it only mean "someone who cuts in"?

>>385858469
Autism

>>385869218
Opal776

I sound like a fat critikal but I am a tall bald black guy and everyone assumes I am a white neckbeard

>turn you mic on
>loud_nigra_mp3

>>385868707
I never understood that, sure when I'm playing with mates I'm not gonna talk to them in English, but we use teamspeak. And when we want to say something to someone else in our team we will speak English to them

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>>385869589
Mostly used when someone cuts in traffic. We generally call bad drivers a woman

>>385869753
>always thought critikal is black guy
>he's actually skinny white nerd

>>385868707
I had Turks invade a teamspeak once, and the only English they knew was "fuck you", and the only Turkish I knew was "siktir git" so that was our communication. Eventually one of them learned to say "I love you" and started saying that instead.

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>join discord/ts
>adorable sounding girl with a foreign accent is on it
>mfw she says my name

>>385870253
kek

>>385867928
UMA

>>385857583
This is literally happening with someone new at the company I work at.

He comes by to "talk" at me every single time I'm about to head home.

"Can I help you?" "Nah, just wanted to talk."

I don't want to talk to you, you uninteresting looking faglet.

>>385871148
DELICIA

>>385866352
hahahaha

>>385858564
this sums up my problem perfectly