ESA 2017

who /freshcoldshowertoruboffsweatoftheday/ here

Trannies

>>384827732
oh my god
i forgot about this
now that my sleeping schedule was back into track
FUCK

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Greetings from cancer! Long time donator, first time autism. It's great to see my childhood get destroyed by Germany. Put my runners towards framing the animals. Hype!

>>384827846
Can't do it. I'm 30% done defragging my data drive! It's intense!

Ivan please be strong.

Would he get a better time if they allowed him to squat on the chair?

>>384827851
no trannies allowed

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>>384827851
> any% gender speedrunners
OMEGALIDL

I would sleep wit this,a pillow and a bed

This is pretty hype lads

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>>384827934
>same image every thread
>twitch memes

>blend with the kraut
GEEZ IVAN

>>384827554
Greetings from autism! Long time cancer, first time donator. It's great to see my Germany get destroyed by animals. Put my money towards killing the Germany. Hype!

he actually gives a lot of background info about mechanics and stuff, not many runners do that and rather meme around

>>384827908
send him your energy and money
>>384827913
that would be unfair

>>384828038
Not much fun though

>IDIOTA
What did he mean by this?

>>384828140
3D was a mistake.

>>384828038
He appears to be alone in the room.

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(embed)

>>384828140
ahegao in 3D is awful. i hate that this shit has become a selfie meme among cosplay sluts.

>>384828309
this
ahegao is the plebbiest shit in the universe

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>EST: 03:30:00

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>>384828140
>DUMB 3D WHORES

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>>384828140

>>384828239
do you get enjoyment from watching people sitting in the background?

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>hoping ESA would lead to comfy threads
>same faggots that ruined gdq threads come back and make it shitposting general

>>384828491
It would be awkward if he was memeing with no couch to play along.

>>384828428
that abrupt movement is really bad
also Ahegao without the fluids is boring
>>384828536
just ignore him niggah
get comfy and have a gud time

>venetica is next
that shits gonna be an even bigger clusterfuck desu

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TRANNIES BTFO

This sequence was dumb as fuck

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shots fired

GDQ eternally btfo

>>384828536
>shitty 4 hour run
>waiting for some good
>shit posting results
Anti-train posting just gives us time to reinforce our beliefs and reach communal hive mind status.

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Ok which one of your fuckers did this donation?

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What the fuck is this level

>>384828536
I'm surprised there's actually a fucking thread this year.

>>384828747
clip it, I missed it

>>384828792
grow up

>>384828792
rip
see you in 3 days

>>384828797
Donator read this "What's this? A speedrunning event that is actually fun to watch and where emotes aren't banned? Never though this was possible."

hm.. should I start up Ring of Red while watchign this
both would be time consuming as hella

>>384828748
The great Leonardo Da Vinci's gatling crossbow cart chase.

Don't you remember that memorable historic moment?

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What's the actual first good run of this event gonna be?

>>384827886
time to become european

>>384828792
How can people like really weeby weebshit like this? They look like aliens.

>>384828858
How will JewDQ ever recover?

>>384828858
ah okay, reasonable

>>384828875
but dishonored was already pretty good

Did they pay blueglass a ticket to be there?

what was the donation, I missed it due to cringe muting it

>>384828919
What so bad about aliens?

>>384828875
San Andreas?

how much screenspace did GDQ have? any screencaps?

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quick post your waifu !!!

pic related is mine

Postal 2 in a week :D

>>384828954
by raising more money in an hour than the whole ESA event

>>384829021
See >>384828858
The best part is you could tell the announcer had a shit eating grin while reading the entire thing

>>384829104
I don't have a waifu.

>>384828712
For some reason I'd like to read a psycholgy survey about peoples behaviour while communicating on the internet

>>384829109
Those fake donations from the sponsors

>>384829150
are you a fag or what ?

>inb4 "muh 3D woman"

>>384828858
>reads this in the middle of a nearly four hour long AC run
Yeah, plenty of fun being had here.

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>>384829150

>>384829203
I like cute girls but I don't understand being obsessed with one in particular.

>>384827934
SUPER HOT

more than halfway into this run

>>384829306
I'm getting pretty bored now

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I'll be counting on you guys to let me know when this run is over. I closed the stream an hour ago.

When will they learn to start marathons with some good runs instead of shit like this.

>>384829475
The Dishonored one was pretty nice

>>384829473
Give it 1 hour and 33 minutes.

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Is Venetica a good speedgame?

>>384829109
And how much of that will go to charity?

>Russian dancing while squatting
ha

Did he just squat?

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>that dance he just made Eizo do

CHEEEEKI BREEEEEEKI

>>384829631
Is Venetica even a good game? Never heard of it

I just finished REmake so a speedrun of that would feel good

CHEEEKI BREEKI CHEEKI BREEEKI

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This Ivan is so dry he could finish painting a wall in Any% with Est. of 30 minutes.

>>384828875
Might as well post what I'm looking forward to

Golden Sun - Sunday - 06:39
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles IV: Turtles in Time - Sunday - 12:44
Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas - Sunday - 14:49
The Legend of Zelda: A Link Between Worlds - Monday - 14:05
Rise of the Tomb Raider - Monday - 18:07
Tomb Raider III: Adventures of Lara Croft - Monday / Stream 2 - 19:58
Final Fantasy VIII - Tuesday - 07:28
Super Mario Sunshine - Tuesday - 18:08
Super Mario Land - Wednesday - 10:43
Super Mario Land 2: 6 Golden Coins - Wednesday - 11:08
Mickey Mania: The Timeless Adventures of Mickey Mouse - Wednesday / Stream 2 - 11:40
New Super Mario Bros. 2 - Wednesday / Stream 2 - 14:07
Castlevania: Order of Ecclesia - Wednesday / Stream 2 - 15:22
I Wanna Be The Co-op - Wednesday - 19:05
Grand Theft Auto: Vice City - Wednesday - 20:15
Momodora: Reverie Under the Moonlight - Thursday - 07:26
The Lion King (SNES) - Thursday - 09:36
Ori and the Blind Forest Definitive Edition - Thursday - 14:34
The Legend of Zelda: A Link to the Past - Thursday - 17:06
Dark Souls - Thursday - 22:44
Dark Souls II - Thursday - 23:54

Where are the swedish girls, my lads?

it isn't looking much brighter tonight... http://www.speedrun.com/Venetica#Any

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>>384829935
you missed her

>>384829947
>1 (one) entire runner
>it's the same guy running it at ESA
What is this shit?

>>384830021
Oh boi

>>384829878
I want to smell feral Liru's manko

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Anything funny happened yet?

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>>384829473
STOP POSTING THAT PICTURE

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>>384829932
>no Mirror's Edge race
almost good taste

>>384830128
no
esa is comfy
memelords leave

>>384829932
let me quote you and put reddit spacing in so I can make a screenshot and use some of this for myself

- Sunday
Golden Sun - 06:39
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles IV: Turtles in Time - 12:44
Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas - 14:49

- Monday
The Legend of Zelda: A Link Between Worlds - 14:05
Rise of the Tomb Raider - 18:07
Tomb Raider III: Adventures of Lara Croft - Stream 2 - 19:58

- Tuesday
Final Fantasy VIII - 07:28
Super Mario Sunshine - 18:08

- Wednesday
Super Mario Land - 10:43
Super Mario Land 2: 6 Golden Coins - 11:08
Mickey Mania: The Timeless Adventures of Mickey Mouse - Stream 2 - 11:40
New Super Mario Bros. 2 - Stream 2 - 14:07
Castlevania: Order of Ecclesia - Stream 2 - 15:22
I Wanna Be The Co-op - 19:05
Grand Theft Auto: Vice City - 20:15

- Thursday
Momodora: Reverie Under the Moonlight - 07:26
The Lion King (SNES) - 09:36
Ori and the Blind Forest Definitive Edition - 14:34
The Legend of Zelda: A Link to the Past - 17:06
Dark Souls - 22:44
Dark Souls II - 23:54

>>384830021
STINKY!

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>>384830021
>tfw no smelly feet see-through shirt persian gf

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This shit is cash

>>384829932
wait what, there is a second stream? how can low income third worlders blow GDQ and their trillions of shekkels so fucking much out of the water?

Is it me or these guys have better venue and setup than the lards?

>>384830283
wait, is that the Irish flag? Is it that cunt that's reading the donations right now?

Surprisingly the place they seem to have rented out looks a hell of a lot nicer than the grimy hotel conference room GDQ always uses.

>>384830364
tech crew aren't incompetent

>>384830364
Yes it starts Monday. It isn't 24 hours either.

>literally using cheats

>>384830408
>>384830532
This years ESA seems to be better than GDQ in every way, it's surprising they're not as popular

That donation

>>384830547
>ESA
>competent tech crew
Have you forgotten how they were late to start the stream and has already had the stream cut during DOOM?

>>384830649
less pandering with nintenbro

> uses cheats
> nobody is watching

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>europoor crowd getting excited over a 2 dollar donation

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Oh boi
I am not missing this one

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>european event
>donations in USD

You have exactly 30 seconds to scientifically explain why the Ezio trilogy is the best thing about Assassin's Creed?

thread music: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mEgE5z6Sl7Y

>>384830796
They are doing RE7 too
Neato

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>>384830752
>>>/bant/

>>384830904
never played Assassin's Creed

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This NA vs EU shit jumped the shark ages ago, it's literally 13 year old kiddy shit

>>384830904
It had Desmond.

>>384830904
Brotherhood and II were GOAT but Revelations was pretty weak

>>384831035
So does AC1 and 3. So that doesn't say or mean much

>>384831014
All those "american made" things are my using European made math

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>>384828919
Stop being so xenophobic, anon.

HAHAHAHAHAHA

>>384830904
Because Ezio was a nice character and the gameplay was a huge improvement over the first game.

>See Ezio be born
>Follow him through life as he grows from a childish playboy into a mature battle tired assassin as he gets older
>See him die

THAT BANEPOST

m e m e
e
m
e

Smokebombs were the most broken shit in AssCreed
>Ayooo just smoke here so I can quad stab everyone

I MISSED IT FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK

Oh god

I fucking hate bane shit at this stage

It hasn't been funny since 2013 and I can only assume it's kids who are still pushing it as a thing

Can you believe baneposting is 5 years old now?

>>384831427
"tell me about Ezio, why does he wear the hoodie"

>>384830364
GDQ could have a second stream if they wanted to but they are retards.

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>baneposting a donation

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Come on it has to have been one you fuckers

I feel bad for Ivan.

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>>384831443

>>384830273
I want to give her the infidel meat.

>>384828536
But I like short-hair Soe

>>384831129
>European grammar

>>384831473
>this is both sad and somehow still weirdly funny
baneposting still needs to die

Please tell me someone clipped the banepost

I'm surprised nobody has donated with some STALKER message

Game up next is some RPG I've never heard of. Is it a good run?

>>384831662
The fuck is this shit run? What is even the language this guy is speaking?

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>>384831443
I hate you

>>384831705
>No CHEEKI BREEKI yet

I'm really liking this run.

>>384831745
english motherfucker, do you speak it?

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who here /stream muted while doing other shit/ ??????

What the fuck?

>>384831853
>Missing the banepost donation

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>naegleria fatfuck is there
>has a run tonight, the only night I can watch

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I don't participate in baneposting but I still find it hilarious

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>>384831443
>Next year Baneposting will be as old as "THIS IS SPARTA"-posting was when Baneposting was born

>>384832084
You're a cool guy

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>>384831959
>implying his shit Sonic 1 run at GDQ wasn't hilarious
i want to see him screw up again

>>384832217
uuuu

>>384832198
That still won't stop ebin memers from spouting it either

>banned from chat for 24 hours
shit, I dindu nuffins, all I did was make a Hatred reference.

anyone got the levels of baneposter infographic? something about how the elder gods of baneposting put it in every situation they can all the time

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>>384832278
Memes take longer to die out now because they're circulated throughout the whole Internet instead of just 4chan. People who are late to the party keep it resurrected and new people are exposed to it like it's brand new.

>>384832327
did you use too many capital letters? more than 3 in a row will get your message deleted already

what was the baneposting message? was it subtle, or just someone saying "this marathon is a big cause.... FOR UUUUUU"

>>384832483
nope. I made a hatred reference, got a 60 second mute, then a mod said if I learned, I jokingly said learning is for losers, then another one asked "you done?" and then I said never, again, jokingly, and got a 24 hour mute
pretty cucked desu

>>384832596
It was extremely painful.

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wew lad
>trump
getting deleted in chat

Europoors can't handle that {{{she}}} didn't win, huh

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>donating to his own incentive
ABSOLUTE M A D M A N

>>384832629
You're a pretty stupid person

>>384832596

http://www.speedrun.com/esa2017/donate/donations

>>384832629
You just made yourself look like some stupid edgy 12 year old so I don't blame the mods at all even if you were pretending.

>>384832771
kek, thanks

>>384832836
It's just dumb memes. Is saying "never" really worth a 24 hour ban?

>>384832629
unironically kys

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>>384832671
IT WAS HER TURN DAMNIT!

>1 hour left

>>384832629
fucking dumbass

>>384832629
>just a prank joke bro relax bro

faggot

>>384832912
You are unironically 16 years old at max. Leave this website immediately

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>>384831014
>yfw you remember King Nigger gave away the Internet to an international council we have no control over as a final fuck you before leaving office

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>went to see Dunkirk at a movie theatre down the block
>the same Assassin's Creed run is still going after I got back home
>still an hour more left to go
Hahah, oh god.

>>384833051
Sorry for not sucking the dick of a mod over a dumb joke, fag.

>>384833116
How was the movie?

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>>384831014

>American invented internet
>Using the British invented world wide web

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>>384833139
You are actually younger than 16 if you think that this would equate to "sucking a mods dick"

please be trolling

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Holy shit these donations

>>384832912
If you are going to keep acting retarded then it isn't hard to see why not. A mod isn't going to put up with your shit if he can't tell if you are really 12 or just pretending. Both are just as bad.

>phanton pain posting

not as good as bane posting desu senpai

>>384833201
I didn't know DARPA was on loan from the British government

SO ANYTHING GOES
WHO GOT SOME MONEY FOR SOME FUNNY MEMES?
I AM A NEET (figures) SO I CANNOT DONATE
COME ON GUYS, DO IT FOR /v/

>saving jesus

checkmate atheists

>>384833319

You don't even know what the WWW is do you?

>>384833373
Where the fuck do you think most of these meme donations came from?

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>He's lost 43.26% of the viewers in the last 90 minutes
cyka blyat...

>>384833581
I get that Russians are poor as fuck and have to struggle for survival every day but can't they not clean their fucking rooms? What the fuck is this nasty shit, how can they live like that?

>>384833581
>gee why did this euro based event lose viewers when it's 1am in europe I don't know guys

>check donation page
>no cheeki breeki
disappointing

>>384831014
>guns everywhere a negative
>while they're getting slaughtered by armed immigrants every other day
Sasuga yuros.

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>>384833683
>1 AM
>implying that is very late at night
>especially on a saturday

>>384833683
Speed running is not a local thing, no one supports local runners and local events.

>>384833415
>fighting over semantics
blabla
WWW doesn't matter without internet which was invented by DARPA
point is, no internet without USA
btw no GPS without USA either
stop being such a nuisence or we have to turn it off for your old world cucks

>>384833752
Suffering

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>>384833793
>1:15 am
>neighbour is singing "SMOKE ON THE WATER" really fucking load so I can hear it through my headphones

not sure what to feel about this

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>>384833924
FIRE IN DA SKYYYY
god I love that song

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>>384833149
Visually it was gorgeous and it's shot really beautifully but I thought the actual """plot""" was really lackluster and the movie just felt boring, there was very little substance to it. Just short clips of different groups people in the middle of a war. I'm glad the movie was as short as it is because even now I got kind of tired of it.

I only wanted to see it because the first reviews called it the new Citizen Kane but I regret paying for it. Maybe a 5/10 at max.

>>384834034

t. Armond White

>>384833924
how about you start singing aswell you faggot

>>384831385
I really like life stories. Where it starts at the start and ends at the end. For some reason they're always more poignant to me.

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Alright nigs, time to call it a night, see you in the morning for Golden Sun, the best game on GBA!

Why would they hire this big arena for a small stream like this

>>384834034
If you're not British I don't think you'd really understand.

We have a different sort of patriotism.

>>384834247
CUTE

>>384834249
Because it's summer.

>>384830904
I kind of forgot how good the soundtrack was for AC2.

First time poster, long time lurker.
Save the traps, kill the whites. Greetings from, Reddit.

>>384834329
Jesper Kyd is fucking great

There doesn't seem to be any exploits or glitches that make you able to play this game very quickly. This was pretty much a Let's Play

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>boring ass graveyard run at GDQ
>empty audience
>well at least this poor guy is getting a fuck ton of viewers on twitch

>boring ass graveyard run at ESA
>empty audience
>barely anyone watching on twitch

poor guy

>>384834425
Are there any other good tracks from it?

>>384834445
He's not even trying to be entertaining though

This is just Russia

>>384834445
At least the donations have been entertaining

>>384830904
That theme was so good they used it twice

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lmlCudR3JPk

fucking Arrow Storm is like genociding gas

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>>384834445

3.6k people is still a big deal for small time streamers.

>>384834456
I liked the venice music a lot

Must be so fun to "speed run" 4 hour long runs. Imagine all areas you have to check for skips and glitches. Fuck that

>>384834445
I don't know, i think it's pretty cool to steam even for 3000 people.

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Did anyone understand anything the donation announcer just said?

>>384834690
I sometimes think "speedrunning is kind of cool, maybe I should try it"

Then I come to my senses.

>>384834690

There's currently a 100% steam of oblivion going on that's 27hours into the run at 36% complete.

>>384834445
would shit my pants if I was streaming for 100 people already

>>384834792
Can I get some haHAA in the chat please? First time donor btw

>>384834034
Seems like something my friend would say about the movie, and he's been wanting to see it. I might try to save him the money. Thanks.

dis vhell bee ze ownlee harse to die en zis rahn

reap harse ;_;7

Every time announcer asks if he can read the donation it looks like the russian guy answers with irritation as if he's doing a favor for letting him read it

>>384834817
is it at least comfy?

>>384834878
Nah he even said yes please to one of them.

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>>384834969

I mean they have a couch

>>384835172
I really should play oblivion again

What the fuck is happening with this story

>>384835385
Ancient aliens.

>>384835172
>Post ends in 72

>>384835453
>>384835172

D E E P E S T L O R E

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>>384835506
>>384835453

It broke

>Ubisoft programming

>ubisoft quality control

Where exactly in Europe is the event taking place?

>>384835772
Växjö, Sweden.

>mention 2 trannies kissing in GDQ
>didn't get banned
Why is ESA so much better? They deserve better.

>>384835772
Y
E
S

>>384835772
The land of the progressive

>>384835772
the muslim part

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>Cathedral off the deep level

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>>384834284
>>384834832
I like character driven movies. The best part of Dunkirk were the only named characters of the movie: an old man and two young lads saving people from the canal on their boat.

I've read comments about how the movie is not about a single person but the event as a whole, the soldiers shown are just one of 400 000 or something and what you see are just glimpses of what's going on in that specific area during that specific time but the problem is that the movie doesn't make that interesting enough. People say it's realistic that nobody speaks for the majority of the movie because that's how war is but I think adding even a few more lines of dialogue and turning down the obnoxious Hans Zimmer soundtrack and constant loud artillery fire just a little would have made a huge difference.

>>384834137
Armond had legitimate points of criticism but I guess people ignore those because he went fullretard in his writeup just to be the contrarian he always has to be.

>Game ends up being the Da Vinci Code with acrobatics

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>>384835772
nice try ISIS

>>384835843
NASA is better

Will there be live overlapping fanfiction readings like at NASA?

really makes me think how AssCreed turned from "THE DNA IS YOUR MEMORIES" to "WE WUZ ALIENZ"

>>384835772
>72
WHAT DOES IT MEAN?

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>>384828019
Underrated post. Nice work anon.

>>384835889
plot was never the reason people like these games

>>384835918
One ESA had a girl called Tinglespalace there who made gay speedrunner fanfiction.

That soundtrack though

>>384836092
>gay speedrunner fanfiction

>game soft locks literally at the end

Poor Ivan. He just wants to be put out of his misery

>Check ESA schedule
>Look at times

Are the times posted in US East Coast Time?

>>384836349
>All times are in your local timezone.

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>he has to do the climbing """puzzle""" again

TWO SOFTLOCKS IN A ROW

UBISHIT
QUALITY

shieeeeet

>it soft locks again

Man. I legit feel bad for Ivan now

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>Softlocks twice

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>>384836384

Is Ivan in infinite loop?

GULAG

Jesus Christ

The run that refuses to end.

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>it happened again

I had no idea the game could soft lock there

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>>384836378
Well shit I didn't knew the schedule page was automated for your location's time zone. Pretty neat.

THREE

>Three softlocks
THE STATE OF UBISHIT

I want this to end so badly.

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Put this run out of its misery.

WAKE ME UP

Great game, Ubisoft.

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Holy shit guys

mercy kill this shit

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again?

>guy lamenting his dead run
>annoying fuckin scot cuts in asking if he can read a donation

FUCKING REMOVE THIS CUNT, GODDAM THIS TRIGGERED ME

3 soft locks in same spot? Shit I bet the dude ran into a gamebreaking glitch which made him unable to progress

I wish i was there to give Ivan a hug when this finally finishes.

>was actually at world record pace

>>384836687
Scottish guy was stopping Ivan from committing sudoku

I hope someone buys him a beer.

This ending annoyed me 2bh

AC has a real knack for going bat shit crazy in the last minutes.

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>1:52am
>eating a can of tuna
>while watching a depressed Russian with zero charm run a game in front of a non existant crowd
>blogposting about it on a Mongolian cartoon image sharing platform
I wonder where my life went so wrong

It's over...

AC was a mistake

NOW HE CAN SPEEDRUN THE CREDITS

Just kidding they're twenty minutes long

>softlock donation not met
Is this true irony?

Wow, what a shit ending

this is sad, not meeting the incentive

IVAN WILL SHOW US SOMETHING BETTER

>incentive not met
JUST

>can show off something extra
ESA better than GDQ

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>donation incentive not met
>run fucked by softlock

feel bad for the poor slav autist

He could finish in 3:15 without glitch.

>'it is done"
>run ends right there

Chekhov is a trooper for sticking around for this whole thing.

>>384836845
Cheer up. At least you have a can of tuna to enjoy while watching this.

>>384836783
Ivan is Russian so someone should buy him vodka.

Oh god

This is so bad

>>384836918
>AC puts a sequence that requires input right after 20 minute long credits just to troll speedrunners
Would've been great.

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>kills an important character because she was only contracted for 3 games and Ubi decided to make 2 more before AC3

The story of Assassin's Creed is not a happy one

>game is even refusing a glitch showcase
Jesus fucking christ

CLAPS

SOMEONE CLAPPED

The lone audience member clapping,
I'm dying.

MY PLANET NEEDS ME

This is a pretty good glitch actually

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>That flying glitch

Noice glitch

>>384837056
>put AC instead of Ubi and quoted the wrong person
Fuck, meant for >>384836901

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>incentive not met
>WELL I HAVE SOMETHING BETTER

I hope someone buys him a vodka spiked beer

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Fly Gorchabev. Fly to your dream!

Loving this sky tour

Thread theme.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KF32DRg9opA

>>384837141
The European YSG, cheering on the runner when nobody else will

Jeez, end this run

>that one dude in the audience
A true bro.

kudos to him. it mustve been hell.

>>384836918
>>384836951
what was the incentive?

>>384837079


i want to buy Jade's game

Ezio is like "I'M OUTTA THIS SHITTY GAME".

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>ESA still hasn't broke 5k in donations

Nice runner.

>>384837257
Ceasar softlock

That was a good glitch 2bh

Shame about the softlocks at the end

>This is the most exposure speedrunning of AC will get
Damn Ivan...why you gotta make me feel bad for you?

>>384837297
This happens every year. Nobody ever donates

>>384837257
A softlock glitch ironically considering what caused him the most trouble.

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>Still flying
>Still going strong

Just like you, Ivan. Just like you.

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>that last sentence

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thanks Ivan

I think that run was gud.

>>384837257
softlock showcase, the ironing

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>>384837297
>travel expenses for everyone just showing up there are WAY beyond 50k

Very nice run!

>>384837357
It wasn't great really. The end was good but the rest was boring.

What the fuck is Venetica?

>>384837423
It's a font.