Cash scam thread #4865465465

grimwah will be #1 once the picoproblems are solved, just you wait

>>383590749
>unironically praising the game
oh sweet summer child

>>383591029
do you have a reading disability?

>>383591029
calling others summerfag while seriously replying to pasta gonna make you look like a retard friend

>>383591085
yep
>>383591149
look like?

>>383590749

(((Cleave)))

>>383591029
>cash scam
>praising

>$40

>>383590749
Don't encourage the mental sick

>>383591906
I just realized he isn't autistic, he's a sociopath.

>>383591906
He's a liar. He banned me because I called him a lazy fraud.

>>383592258
he's a TRUE neanderthal

Is Clive the new Todd?
I keep thinking of this video https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yvGXCisAaR4

It will be an honor for me to pirate this game. I'm even thinking of buying a VPN for 41$ just for the lulz

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Hmm

>>383593569
>called a "prodigy"
>reading and writing at 2 & 3 years old
Fuck him. I could read and write when I was "2 & 3" and no one called me a prodigy. Sheltered fat motherfucker.

>>383593569
lol

>>383591906
>permabanned for life

as opposed to permabanned for a week or two

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GOLDEN ERA GAMES [developer] 23 minutes ago
Modern people think Hyperborea is Robert E. Howard intellectual property.

I tried to locate an estate lawyer for Pindar by writing to the Greek Embassy but nobody wrote me back.

In World War II, Charlie Chaplin's evil nazis tried to take over the world, until the U.N. was formed with robot dinosaurs and "Un-Nazied" the world.

>>383594349
/v/'s Terry Davis.

>>383594349
>>383594410
Terry Davis has actually created something, though.

>>383593917
>served in the military
>sheltered

A reminder development for this game started in the same year as Duke Nukem Forever.

>>383595678
Earlier than that, it predates DN3D.

>There was one miniquest left that was just an enum placeholder, never implemented it. Always planned to but there was always something higher priority to work on. Implementing it now.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

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lol

it's baffling how anyone can unironically believe this will be released

>>383596252
Don't worry, shouldn't take more than a few days to implement it.
And then he can start bugtesting everything from zero to make sure nothing broke ;)

>>383595838
You're right, I thought it was exactly 20 years, but it's even more than that. DNF started in 1997, 20 years ago.

>>383590749
Remember, nothing makes Cleve more butthurt than asking about the alleged connection between Grimoire and the Stones of Arnhem game which he got fired for while he was a developer at Sir-Tech.

>>383596252
>>383596409
This guy has never heard about a feature freeze, right? You don't fucking add new features after god knows how much testing, and after a missed launch deadline.

>>383596771
Why was he fired? He's definitely a passionate developer.

>>383596409
>this is the big moment I've been planning for 23 years
>it's not even implemented yet even though he has repeatedly claimed the game was complete in 2005

If anyone still thinks Cleve isn't a fat fucking fraud, they're literally retarded.

>>383596776
He started working on this game in 1994 anon. The development is older than most people on /v/. There's convincing arguments that the only times he does work on the game is around "release dates" and there's not much more content than what's in the latest demo.

>>383596409
I'm going to be honest, I was half-hoping it was real until I saw that. That's a pretty clear mark of a scam.

Also, is the implication that his quests or other specific game elements are enumerated types? That seems like a coffee smell.

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>>383596856
He was fired because he and his team produced nothing useful in his 2 years of working at Sir-Tech's brand new Australian branch.

Sounds familiar?

>>383596961
Cleve hasn't actually released a game since like 1992, and most of his games were type-in magazine releases. He probably still codes like it's the 80s.

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>>383596771
>mfw

>>383592463
>Is Clive the new Todd?

He's been the Todd of RPGCodex for the past 20 years

>>383597054
I remember one of his posts where he had discovered class-based programming and was excited about how much better it was than what he had been doing up until that point. That's something that has been popular since the late fucking 70s.

I believe the whole Neanderthal thing, because the guy is obviously a fucking caveman.

>>383596409
>who the fuck needs a game when you can also have memes and a magnetic personality

>>383592463

don't slander Todd by comparing him to this fraudster. Todd Howard has released several critically acclaimed games for a fair price. This is supposed to be 600 hours? how cute. Every Bethesda game from oblivion on boast 1000 easy!

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Quest handler in Grimoire

>>383596961
>>coffee smell
I meant (and typed) code smell.

>>383592291
Lazy worthless unsubstantiated claims.

>>383596856
Passionate people are often the fucking worst to work with. Especially if they're asperger neanderthal conspiracy psychos.

>>383597540
Did he put every single quest into a single switch statement?

However this game sells it will fuel his crazy mind. I look forward to the release (if it ever happens) so much.

>>383597740
For a one-man, non-neurotypical programming team, that might actually be the best way.

>>383590749
>One person working on the game
>promises a couple hundred hours of content
>spends this long shilling his shit

How did you morons not see this coming?

No one told him in 20+ years that "Heralds of the Winged Exemplar" is a very silly-sounding name?

Won't ever stop lol'ing at this guy, even if it becomes more and more obvious that he has never had a game to actually make, only a rejiggered demo from stolen code.

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Cleve on Steam - About to release a Cleveland Steamer

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>>383598390
>About to release
Ha ha ha, that's a funny joke.

>>383598313
It's an great name. It communicates very effectively that this is some serious nonsense fantasy bullshit and if you're the kind of person who thinks DnD is nerdy then you're way out of your depth.

It's a casual filter right on the cover of the box.

pastebin.com/L00iZEnB

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>>383597470

BUY IT

>>383598517
Jeez it's been a while since I've seen this picture.

https://pastebin.com/FRk6j1EE

>>383598005
mate, switches are never the best way for anything

Now that those brave anons archived that gigantic thread from the codex, it will be the work of others to start sifting through and finding the choice pieces of autism chronicling Cleve's 20+ year obsession with taking his unfinished and stolen game demo to fruition.

https://pastebin.com/ZJHKtjkK

>>383599205
They might have been 20 years ago before people figured out polymorphism.

>>383599135
oh my god

>>383599276
>Now that those brave anons archived that gigantic thread from the codex

Link? I don't really want to pay to read that shit

>>383598313
Going by the code being posted in the thread, the people he stole it from sure were incompetent.

>>383598592
What the fuck is that?
Why does he define all those Mapnotes and checkpoints and that one item id in an npc class?
Why isn't that shit in some header?
What does Say(14) mean? who rides code like that?
>>383599135
Oh jesus christ, make it stop.

>>383590749
Honestly I am hype as fuck for this game and I know it's coming out. It's just a common thing for sapes to hate on neanderthals with thal genes. You will eat crow when we get this game and it is literally the best rpg of all time.

Fucking loser sapes. Prepare to die of a heart attack from how shocked you are that the game is so amazing.

>>383599617
They put the thread in the general discussion area, everyone can see it.

>>383599838
I haven't read the pastebin stuff, but the "Say(x)" stuff looks like a preprocessor macro that inlines global strings which is (was, I guess) a fairly standard way of doing things.

Skill trainer
https://pastebin.com/3RXDGRwd

>>383599967
>you will eat crow
as a non-native english speaker, is this a common saying? I know cleve uses it so fucking much, is it obscure or should I know it?

>>383598592
>>383599135
>>383600092
Where are these coming from?

>>383599969

Is that "Grimoire thread" with the OP by Cleve the same old "why Sirtech went bankrupt" thread? The one formerly on RetardoLand?

>>383600189
Grimoire SuperDemo data files

>>383600168
I was asking myself the same question the other day.
What the fuck does that mean?

>>383600168
Never heard that saying in my life. His entire speech pattern is bonkers

>these persons in the steam discussion pages desperately trying to defend caveman cleve and attacking others
shit's hilarious, yo

>>383600168
Fellow non-native English speaker here, used to work with Americans and never heard them use it. I know what it means and have seen it before, but I don't think it's an everyday conversation phrase.

>>383600168
>>383600457
>>383600467
It's reasonably common in some areas, just a bit archaic.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Eating_crow

>>383599418
Or you could just make a function for each quest, so it's nicely self contained.

So instead of having a SpecialQuestHandler(6812) function which is a million lines long and you have to look up the quest ID every time and one typo or missed break; instruction will break the whole thing, you could have a HandleQuest[insert quest name here]()

>>383600168
>>383600457
>>383600467
It's a really old way of saying, something like "If X happens [implying it never will], I'll eat my hat!" Or "eat my words".

>>383600709
>>383600751
I've learned something today! Thank you, kind anons. May your games be released whenever you wish.

>>383600168
Not really. I means like 'eat your words' or 'have to admit you were wrong' if you want to take all the poetry out of it.

Wiktionary suggests: "Rudyard Kipling (1865–1936) used this concept as a central metaphor in his short story "The Strange Ride of Morrowbie Jukes" (1885). Morrowbie Jukes, a European colonist in India, falls into a sand-pit from which he cannot escape. Another man, a native Indian, is also trapped there who catches wild crows and eats them, but Morrowbie in his pride declares, "I shall never eat crow!" After days of nothing to eat, his hunger and desperation finally force him to do what he swore he would never do: literally eat crow.[9]"

>>383600380
Why did he ship source code with his demo?

>>383600948
>why is Cleve incompetent

Why do sapes eat crow?

>>383600948
He was trying to trick Bethesda into stealing his revolutionary game engine so he can sue them for a million dollars to fund his game development for 30 more years.

>>383590749
that's simple we pirate it and say it's shit

Lads this game has to be released. Imagine all the memes

>>383599838
He has a 180+ IQ, there's no way a normal person can understand his coding

Can someone fill me in on why we give a shit about this?

>>383591906
There must be somebody from Sir-Tech still alive to witness this, have they never commented on the rumours of Grimwah being stolen source code?
Or does he keep them away by threatening to sue anyone who claims it is?

>>383601492
Because it's a dead subgenre and a new game would be nice.

>>383592258
This is very good example of sociopath. You have probably seen them in real life as well, i.e. at working place but usually it's such restrictive place that the behavior doesn't get out of control but Cleve's example of narcissistic sociopath. Or something very similar.

>>383601492
Memes

>>383601601
they probably don't care and think he's a mentally ill "programmer" who will never release his game anyway

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>>383597078
At least it wasn't batshit insane description like mine. And what is %text%?

>>383601601
There is John Romero's wife, but she's just as crazy and thinks herself as the most influential woman in video games.

>>383594329
Hey, week or two is a long time for kids.

>>383601956
I guess he copypasted wrong?

>>383601601
http://jaggedalliance.wikia.com/wiki/Calvin_Barkmore
>Whoa! You one of those inspector guys? Let me tell you right off the bat that I run the most technologically advanced mine in all of Arulco. Built from the ground up with stolen American technology. But it's all mine.
>Oh no. You're one of those mercenaries. I was in the army once, full of dope-puffing socialists. You probably heard of me, Calvin Barkmore, broke every record they keep track of.
>I suppose, since you're in charge, you'll want all the money. Leave me the crumbs you call salary. Well...I guess I got no choice! But one day I'm going to get my own mine, then you watch.
>Here's the thing. Other miners? They think they're better than me. Point is, I'm an innovative genius. Eventually, the Queen will recognize that, and I'll become Head of Head Miners.
>You obviously don't know who you're talking to! Calvin Barkmore! I will devote all my waking hours toward making your life a living hell if you continue to talk to me this way.
>Well, I'm a busy man. Everyone wants a moment of my time, so I'll be going.
>No, the last time I was recruited, it kinda pushed me over the edge.

>>383602002
I don't know. At least she's been designing games and was involved with Wizardry 8. This is probably why Cleve has something against her as well because she worked for Sir-Tech and actually made visible results instead of this fraud we call Cleve. She just gives seminars and lectures as well. At least she has something to back her talks up, unlike Cleve and let's say this Anita Sarkeesian for example.

>>383602118
How can 180+ IQ, hardened developer with decades and decades of experience can copypaste something wrong.

>>383600168
t. croweater

>>383602364
Valve's forum runs on inferior Sapiens melonhead tech, obviously the ban form just misinterpreted his advanced Neanderthal inputs.

>>383602364

you wouldn't understand, crofagnon

>>383602515
I can see in my mind how Cleve is actually working few steps ahead of the computer. He is not in this time but in the future, predicting the result of advanced algorithms. If we ever had the possibility to examine the real source code of Grimoire it would be so advanced that we couldn't even understand it and thus it could easily be interpreted as gibberish.

>>383602364
By being too busy not working on his game

It's already Tuesday and albeit of all reports on the store page Valve haven't done anything. This shows lack of respect towards their customers.

>>383602838
Reporting is a bit awkward since there's no report option for "this game doesn't exist". So you either have to use the Fraud option for fake advertising (but this doesn't really fit Valve's definition of fraud) or the Broken option for not being able to play the game (but is that really relevant if you can't even buy the game?).

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>>383602247
this type of shit-talking cracks me up. Everyone must have thought that he was a lunatic. Sirotek repeatedly referred to Cleve as some "crackerjack programmer" when he was talking about the Stones of Arnhem debacle.

>>383603167
Crackerjack is old slang for "exceptionally good" so that wasn't a slam on Cleve's abilities.

>>383603586
Slang from the neanderthal times?

>>383603127
I used the Legal option and explained about the earlier missed deadlines, scamming money with indiegogo and selling product which doesn't exist and promising that to customers is not good for Steams credibility.

But I'm certain Valve wont do jack shit. They are only interested in your money instead of properly reviewing the store sellers. Steam is too big in this sense that if few people protest because of shitty dungeon crawler scam, they wont lose any money because of that. There's still millions and millions of other people who use Steam daily. Etc.

But I'm wondering this should be reported to local authorities instead. There is consumer protection and authorities/watchdogs who enforce it in each country Steam operates on. Originally people who were involved giving money on the original Indiegogo campaign should have reported Cleve to their local authorities instead of complaining on RPG Codex about it or even worse, complaining directly to Cleve on some internet forum. Even on Steam Cleve 'promised' to refund the indiegogo money if people would just give him their addresses etc. But that's bullshit.

>>383602838
You really have to fuck up to have your shit taken off steam.

>>383603586
Honestly I know Cleve is like the trump of vidya, but I honestly believe he's a genius. Seriously the way he writes is really old english. I can't wait to see grimoire if it comes out. The story will be insane.

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>>383590749
>FACTS

>>383603794
this

>>383603794
You don't now understand. As long as there are people believing the game will come out, Cleve will always surface after few month hiatus and scam people again. Then delay it again. This exact cycle has been going on for 20 years now. Exact same thing. "Just one more week of bug fixing" and then he suddenly disappears for a while.

>>383604135
Is he taking money from people when he does this, or is it just an ego trip?

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>>383604135
How is he scamming people?

YOU CAN'T EVEN BUY THE GAME YOU FUCKING RETARD.

>>383604135
Not him but I agree completely. The man just sucks cash out of suckers who don't realize there are better CRPGs out there... like Wizardry 8! Or Grimrock 2.

The only thing i would like to see, if this scam of the last century is released, is how Cleve's personal insanity, autism, personal vendettas, conspiracy theories, and crypto-facism leak into the game's story and dialog. That would be a sight to behold.

>every enemy in the game is some strawman or avatar of Cleve's decades-long frustrations
>Cleve is portrayed as the superhuman king of the realm, whom everybody is always talking about and commenting on his abilities, which are beyond comprehension

That would be fantastic, even though it will never happen.

>>383604413
He's only ever taken money from the indiegogo campaigns.

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>>383604413
Research that by yourself. Should be easy to find the truth.

>>383604538
https://i.4cdn.org/v/1499794676911.jpg

Writing in caps means you are the retard, retard.

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>>383604538
He's had like 2 or 3 indiegogo campaigns, the most recent of which made like 15,000 dollars. Which I assume went into the restocking of his nuclear bunker.

>>383603794
I'm gonna read the whole thing in his crazy voice. "GrimWAH! Is a game so epic it took 23 years to make!....only a madMAN would do that. *softly* I am that madman..."

You can ride a turtle.

>>383604706
God fucking damnit. If there is a nuclear war this fucking guy is going to make it while we all die.

JUST

>>383604706
That's one mighty bunker. I love how he uses duct tape to insulate the window, preventing radioactive ash from leaking inside.

>>383604931
What window? He's underground.

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>>383590749
You stupid sapes are at it again.
Stop trying to make cleve's hard 20+ years of work look like trash.

he's trying his best, would you rather have a game that's full of bugs?
Of course with a brain as inferior as yours you wouldnt understand that this kind of thing takes time.

>>383605006
You know what it is, it's septic tank...

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Cleve explains how he was forced to become 300 pounds, because of SirTech, and how THAT'S ALL GUNNA CHANGE ONCE GRIMOIRE IS OUT

>>383604878
I bet he will forget to close the door or something and die.

>This much autistic screeching because a game didn't come out after 4 days

lol

>>383605115
>sapes
ok cleve we get it
I cant wait to pirate your never ever shitty game

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http://www.rpgcodex.net/article.php?id=3815

>>383605357
The game has not come out after 20 years.

>>383604878
>>383604931
That's not a window in the back. It's a ventilation fan. Given that it's covered like that, it's probably not being maintained properly. He'll probably suffocate to death in the first 2 weeks if he seriously uses it.

Unless his superior neanderthal DNA makes it so he doesn't need air to survive.

There's no proof he stole anything though.

>>383605485
So did you want the game to come out or what? Cause otherwise who gives a shit, you're just doing this for fun obviously.

>>383605363
Why would you even pirate it? This kind of game is shit.

>>383605735
>This kind of game is shit.
Okay

>>383605961
Oh so you want to play his shitty stone age game and suck his cock? Got it.

>>383605735
After all that hype, him saying it is coming out over and over again, and the two indiegogo campaigns we want to see how the game turns out. Sure the game will be most likely shit but we need to see it with our own eyes.

>>383605387
Is this some "running out of internet" level of delusion?

>>383606203
Image leeching was more of a big deal back in mid-00s.

If you spent over 20 years working on something you'd be desperate too.

>>383606124
>Oh so you want to play his shitty stone age game
Yes
>suck his cock
No

>>383606268
Ah yes, now I remember how some sites still forbid hotlinking. It's funny to accuse someone else of that though.

>>383606282
>working

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>>383605363
>pirating my, i mean his game
of course you're too poor to afford it.
You sapes should all be gassed.

>>383606124
>suck his cock
i want to pirate his game so think twice mongrel

>>383596771
What are you talking about, Cleve has written about it in full. Threads are behind the codex paywall now, but most of it is reposted here:
http://www.cookdandbombd.co.uk/forums/index.php?topic=32803.0
http://archive.is/5R1n9

>>383606505
no i just shit on cleve and his worthless trash calling """"never ever game""""
>he dont waste money on games so he must be poor lel ebin
console shitter tier post go back to sucking cleve dick for nothing

>>383593569
Ok so his mom, wife, and son are all fake? This shit just keeps getting deeper. /v/ always finds the best psychos to shit post about.

>>383607446
Maybe Cleve himself is fake.

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>>383607051
t.sape

You went full sape, never go full sape.

>>383596776
He probably has but you realize none of this is real. This is a piece of performance art. There is no grimoire. Grimoire is a game like Spinal Tap is a band.

>>383607978
Grimoire exist

>>383607978
Or like the tiny thing in your pants is a dick.

Do you believe Grimoire is releasing this week? Cleve has only added more tags to store page, that's everything. No binary uploads, like... ever.

>>383607557
how taste cleve dick? like his game? like nothing?
spam more sapes maybe this will help u to shine in his eyes

>>383608704
Why are you so upset sape? Can't accept that grimoire is going to be amazing, I bet you've never played wizardry before. What a sape cuck.

Grimoire is getting released at the end of the month, but his most loyal fans will get an early copy this week.
All you have to do is make 10 posts supporting the game in any forum and send a screenshot to his email as proof.
I'm going to laugh so hard at you guys when I'm finally getting the game in a few days.

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why can't 4chinners just let good things phase out naturally? there were hilarious threads on friday and saturday of last week, now its just fucking sad. this autistic animal is never going to release the game, all laughs have already been had, stop giving this abomination the attention he is so obviously desperate for. I realize you are all on the spectrum is well, but please stop obsessing over nothing

Cleve is one of the most talented shitposters in the world

don't forget to report this faggot for fraud on steam!

>>383609038
THIS

>>383607978
There are demos though

I'm not disagreeing with you; I think this is all a big joke, but at some point he did release demos

>>383604556
It's like a sonichu game with different characters.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xDyXSCd2Lp0

GRIMWAAAAAHHHHH

>>383610420
why are there no corner walls to anything? Everytime he turns the pc there's always some weird open spacing or overlapped textures

>>383610420
>the ultimate classic retro old skool fantasy roleplaying game

fucking kek

>>383610635
It's a bug. In order to fake the 3d he needs to exte nd the textures when turning smoothly. When Cleve was asked about this issue he replied it's a "feature" and proceeded to bash the poster who questioned him. Truly a genius developer.

>>383604556
>Cleve is the ingame god
>if you cheat and somehow defeat him the game's world starts to collapse
>a minute later the game deletes itself from your hard drive because you killed the creator

>>383611067
>best time travel paradox story 2017

>>383611067
>it reinstalls itself 23 years later

>>383610897
It makes it look like hallways are just appearing in corners out of fucking nowhere. Good god that's fucking terrible. 23 years and he can't figure out how to make walls have actual corners

the games going be released this friday. Go outside and get some sunlight because obviously you fuckers following this guy and his game need to.

>>383610420
someone should make a gif of that "fearsome creature, the kraken."

>>383612420
LOL

>>383612420
I have a better chance of losing my virginity today than the game coming out

Anyone willing to post one of the betas?