This Journal Belongs To: Mario Mario

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There was an access panel that wasn't marked on my map, but the stuff was coming from there so I opened it up and walked in. I could see the daylight up ahead so I kept going. I expected there to find maybe some swampy flooding, maybe some leaves that got shoved into the tunnel and were rotting to cause the stuff. Boy was I wrong!

I pop my head out and hear something behind me. Now, I'm pretty sure there wasn't anything there when I started through the tube and I hadn't seen anything following me in the sewers, but these walking mushrooms with attitudes came out of nowhere and started chasing me! I know it sounds crazy, but they're real! They had angry little faces and shoes...and yeah, that doesn't sound any better, but it's true.

You can't blame a guy for running from them, neither. I wouldn't hang around for an angry dog, never mind some mushroom monster I've never seen before. I mean, you get chased by some irritated fungus and tell me you're gonna stay around to find out what their problem is. I didn't think so.

So anyway, I'm running and running, and there's all kinds of crazy stuff trying to get a little slice of Mario pizza. There were more mushrooms and a bunch of turtles with sharp looking beaks for mouths. I've seen snapping turtles down at the little river in the park, but the ones out here were huge and fast and much angrier! There were also these monstrous Venus flytrap things on steroids popping up out of other pipes and snapping their mouths at me like I was some kind of tasty cannoli. It seems like everything here wants to eat me!

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I was so busy watching out for their teeth that I ran smack into a brick wall with a metal box! Okay, okay. I was getting pretty tired from running, too, which probably didn't help. I've been planning to get back into the gym to fix that, but money's been tight. I promise if this job pays and I get home I'll use the money to get a membership. Though I do swear that any plant with teeth is more than enough to make you do a double-take. It's no wonder I ran into something.

Anyway, tripping into that wall smarted a little, but it wasn't exactly a big, sturdy wall or anything like that. The bricks all fell down and the metal box fell open. A different mushroom that didn't have a face on it rolled out onto the ground. I grabbed it thinking I could maybe throw it at the things chasing me and get them to leave me alone so I could catch my breath. Instead, the second I touched it, the mushroom vanished. No, really! It just disappeared! When it did though, I felt all kinds of better. Stronger, more powerful - I'm not sure how to describe it. It felt kind of like I'd just finished drinking three pots of really strong coffee.

Whatever that vanishing mushroom did, it gave me enough oomph to get my rear end back up and start running again. I finally came into a big staircase that looked like it led over a wall. I ran up it, hoping maybe the mushrooms and turtles wouldn't be able to climb over the steps since they seemed to be about as tall as the creatures chasing me. When I got to the top, I realized there was a slight problem. The stairs went absolutely nowhere. They just kind of ended with a big drop down, like they were meant to be some kind of overlook. I may be a plumber and not an architect, but even I know that's a bad design.

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At any rate, there was this tiny brick building with a tall flag pole on the other side of the walls and stairs but it was on ground level. Still, I couldn't go back the way I came. There was a whole group of angry mushrooms and snapping turtles crowded at the bottom of the stairs.

Much as I hated the idea, I realized that the only option was to try to jump onto the flagpole and slide down it. That took a lot of guts and pep talking but I made it, and now I'm here sitting in front of this little building and another one of those pipes like the one I came out of. It's quiet here and I don't see anything trying to come munch on me, so I decided to take a few minutes to write all this down in my journal just in case. Nothing has come out yet, so I'm going to try poking my head inside the tiny castle and see if someone inside can help me out. If not, I'm planning to check the pipe and see where it leads. It's not like I can climb back up out of here.

This job better pay well. I didn't bargain on getting lost in the park and chased by rabid animals.

-Mario

bump to keep this autistic mess alive as I read it

gay

Keep this alive so I can post an epic fail guy story when I get home.

Started out okay, but kind of went to shit when he got to the Mushroom world.

>>382373887
ok

>>382374380
>Started out okay,
The very first words are Mama mia!

wtf is this