>And then Mario takes the mushroom and gets high

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>>381300292
> his mind completely broken, Kirby engages in a PCP-fueled frenzy, eating everyone in his vicinity, stealing their identities in the process.

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>Pokemon battles are literally animal cruelty

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>>381300292
>Link bursts into someone's home and breaks pots
>They get mad

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>the missing townsperson was the final boss the whole time

>this pipe could be a good melee weapon

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>>381300292
>Mario hits a block
>falls and suffers a severe head injury

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>>381300292
>There's a mysterious artifact linked to a prophecy in the starting town
>It gets stolen

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>Ms. Pacman is just pacman in drag

>and then the skyrim man put a bucket over the npc's head and stole everyones shit instead of being the legendary hero

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>Peach fucks bowser while mario tries to save her

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>Mario is too busy playing kart to save Peach

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>died in the story
>why didn't they just use a phoenix down

>Main character dies
>Doesn't respawn

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>these characters should be 50 years old in real life why don't they age
>why are they not married