Mario Odyssey Grentexts

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>be me
>work really hard to climb the corporate ladder for years
>"anon can you do a presentation for blank"
>thisismychance.png
>work for weeks on a presentation that will get me the promotion
>finally the day has come
>go to my car that morning and the battery is dead
>begin to walk to work
>see short italian man with a huge head staring at me
>he jumps a solid 8 feet into the air and throws his hat at me
>my mind goes dark
>I am awake but I cant control my body
>I begin to do things no 36 year old should be doing
>begin jumping ridiculous heights and doing flips
>it hurts so much but I cant scream
>jump on some wierd muchroom looking things
>suddenly he flies out of my body and runs off
>I limp to work and am 2 hours late
>boss doesnt believe my story and fires me on the spot
>I am at home now and have drank 2 bottles of whiskey
>I put the rope around my neck and prepare for the end

tldr: an italian manlet ruined my life