Parents and vidya gaems (keep it /v/, faggots)

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My mom is in love with Earthbound and is beating the game for a second time as we speak.

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>Playing any team based multiplayer game
>dad walks in
>"shoot him"
>but dad hes my tea-
>shoot him anyway

My brother and I used to play Sonic 2 with my dad sometimes. We'd both take turns being Tails. On top of that I'd sometimes watch him play Tomb Raider 1-3.

My mom and I beat Super Mario World together after we got a SNES. She was better at getting to the bosses and I was better at beating them.
My dad and I beat alttp a lot around that time as well. And much later my sister beat Paper Mario, TTYD, and Super Paper Mario together.

>Playing Prince of Persia: Sanda if time not long after it came out
>Dad watching me play from the back of the room
>Every now and then he chuckles for no reason
>"Dad?"
>*He smirks and shakes his head while looking at the game
>Keep playing
>Hear him behind me "I tell ya, heh"
>"Tell me what dad?"
>"heh, I tell ya, you don't believe me but I tell ya!"
>...
>Keep playing
>"Heh heh, alright, if you want to know!"
>"You're jumping around killing these monsters. Where do you think the people who made all these games you play came up with these monsters? HA!"
>"Uhh, I dunno dad, where did they"
>*shakes head while smiling* "heh, I tell ya, it's the Aliens! They make these games so that when they come no one will bat an eye, they'll all be used to it! That's where the creators are getting the ideas, from the aliens. Ya don't believe me, but I tell ya! It's the truth! Heh"
>"But why are they always the bad guys if they want us to accept them when they come?"
>"I don't know, it's their plan"
>...
>...
>"... Does stabbing those clouds let you go back in time?"
>"Yeah otherwise I run out of sand... "
>"Oh, heh"

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> 2 months ago bought Naruto Clash of ninja 3
> Come to my parents house one weekend, dad wants my wii for hulu so he can watch cosmos
> Accidentally hits eject button and the game disc comes out
> "son whats this?"
> Look at dad like a dumbass for a whole 30 seconds
> W-wanna get d-drunk and play it with me dad?
> "sure!"
> mfw it the most fun i had that month
> mfw when getting blackout drunk trying to unlock higher difficulties.
> mfw he always asks if I brought "The Naruto Game" with me when I come over.

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>Mom would always play games like mario party with me
>Eventually she got a DS
>This past summer she sold it, and the games she had with it
>She now only plays ipad games like Candy Crush and all the other cancer King games
>At least she has the decency not to give them money

>Dad used to play quite a few games with me, his favorite was Mario Kart
>Eventually he leaves
>When he would come over to visit we would play vidya, but less and less as time went on
>Now the most he plays is solitaire on his phone

I used to have a half-brother from my dad's side, but he blamed all his problems on my dad and disowned him. He actually got me into smash.

>>268595524
You dad believes in the pleadians too?

ayy lmao
But yeah i know how that goes ha

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>tfw parents hate videogams

I just want to play with them together. They wont even try.

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>>268593823
>That episode of Ren & Stimpy

>>268593823
Played sports games with my dad when I was a kid.

More interesting:
>I had this one game for PS1 called Team Buddies when I was young
>Grandma came over to watch me while parents were out of town.
>we played the shit out of that game; she was actually pretty good, too.
>probably the only time I ever bonded with my grandma.

>>268593823
>Dad was a fucking deadbeat NEET who used vidya to parent me
>Used to sit on his lap as an infant when he played Quake at lan parties
>Grew up playing his SNES and his dreamcast
>Got me a computer with MAME on it so I could play hundreds of arcade ROMs, even japanese ones
>Got me one of those emulator cartridges for my GBA (I always loaded it with the shittiest games too.)
>He never married my mom
>Broke up with her as soon as I was born and shagged up with this Korean cunt
>They had a kid and I played with him all the time, especially the SNES
>Years later, hadn't seen either of them in forever
>We're meeting for lunch so he can talk with my mom about the child support he wasn't paying
>Broke up with his second wife too, so my half-brother was there
>Off-handedly ask what happened to the SNES, because I was getting interested in retro games
>Half brother says his mom sold it without asking anyone
>Haven't seen either of them since
>Half brother lives with his mom
>Last I heard my dad had met another woman and moved to California to be a massage therapist

My family's fucked up.

>Make a post about how I stole from the church and sell drugs in Morrowind on Facebook
>Mom comments
>"Wow anon, what a great game! It looks like it really gives you some deep choices and in so proud of you for thinking about these things and sharing your unique view with us! I love you!

I'm not sure she read the post...

My mom used to be "addicted" to the original Zelda, but found OoT too confusing.

My bros and my Dad will play Mario Golf every now and again.

>>268596717
> /v/ grows up

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>mom beats super Mario world while pregnant with me
>beat link to the past before me
>only ever let me watch her play doom
>beats ratchet and clank before me
>starts obsessing over the sims, buys all the expansions
>bejeweled
>now she only plays hidden picture games on her phone
>tfw

>>268593823
>Donkey Konga
>Mom wants to play my game
>"Okay, just one quick song."
>She fucking sucks
>Step dad wants to play my game after her
>Just want to go back to playing alone
>Make up some bullshit about how they're both not too great and that they'll mess up my win ratio.
>"Oh. Fine anon. Play your stupid game."
>Oh shit he's pissed
>"Anon let your stepdad play."
>Try to offer it to him.
>"No! I don't wanna play. Let the baby have his bongos."

Still makes me cringe when I think about it.

> Parents use to play tekken 2 casually

Post their mains
Your dad will never fuck Nina Williams ;_;

If my Dad ever sees me playing MGS, he stops to watch. He loves the kooky plot and characters (He's a Kubrick/Lynch fan). His favorite moments were thehe end of MGS2 whereyou're running around naked and getting calls from colonel and the first boss fight from MGS4 ( he actually got a jump scare, and we've watched hella horror movies and that rarely happens).

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>Vidya character cusses
>My mother's face when

...and yet she doesn't flinch when there are half naked people or giant tits.

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>Tfw playing Gran Turismo 3 with my Dad all the time

He played a whole load of vidya in his childhood but now he doesn't have the time for them. He respects the medium and let me play 18+ games from the age of around 5. He's cool.

My mum has no fucking idea how technology works, her phone is twelve years old and she can't work a computer.

>In my room playing Mega Man 9
>Mom walks in
>Asks what I'm playing
>"Oh that's cool. I beat the original Mega Man."
>Ask her if she wants to play
>"Nah I'm not too good at these."
>Tell her I bet she never beat Mega Man
>"Fuck you I beat 1 and 2."
>Give her the controller and tell her how to play
>Doesn't even get close to Splash Woman
>"Fuck you I was better when I was younger."

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>Be somewhat young
>Have 2 brothers older than me
>They get a Mega Drive for Christmas about a year before the saturn because my mum bought it for them
>Dad doesn't give a shit about vidya
>Next Christmas
>Mum buys a Saturn and puts it away for Christmas
>Christmas eve
>We're all asleepp
>Dad has gone to the airport to say goodbye to relatives etc.
>She sets out everything during the night
>Can't find the Saturn
>Looks all over the house
>Dad comes home
>Mum asked him has he seen the saturn
>"Oh yeah, the kids already had one so I gave it to our relatives who were leaving at the airport"
>my mother's face when

Funny thing is This isn't the first time he did this, my mum bought my brothers a SNES and a Mega Drive, and he took the SNES because he believed having too many is too bad.

>>268597505
>not wanting to fuck her yourself

>>268597481
wow man you sound like a dick

>>268597505
>Mum loved Tekken 4
>Always picked Christie
>Couldn't deal with her spam bullshit because I was a idiot kid
>Mum always shit talked when she beat me

>>268597867
That's because inticreates can't into level design.
>"Fuck you I beat 1 and 2."
/v/'s mom incarnate

>>268597786
because being nude is natural, and not necessarily provocative
swearing is unnecessarily vain and provocative
besides its not like your mom has not seen a dick or two before, THINK ANON.

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>playing mgs1
>cutscene that happens after you defeat revolver ocelot and youre talking to president baker
>dad walks in and watches the cutscene for about 30 seconds
>"is this a movie?"

>>268597867
Oh also Bonus story:

>Playing Super Paper Mario
>Grandma is on the couch, half-watching half-reading a book
>"Isn't that mario guy's games always the same shit? Why does anyone keep buying them."
>"Not this one Mama."
>Flip the stage to show her
>"Holy shit. Do that again."
>Flip the stage three or four times, walk around some
>"Holy shit, Tony get in here."
>Grandpa walks in
>Show him too
>"What the fuck? How you do that?"
>Spend like ten minutes entertaining them.

>>268593823
My mom thought all games were made in Japan.

She played Zelda a lot when I was a kid, she even played one I got for my birthday before my birthday, so when I started it, there was already a savefile.

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>Hey anon, can you put on some video games for your younger cousin while he's over?

>>268594220
>not shooting him anyways

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>>268598273
your grandparents sound like bros

>>268597943
Holy shit this is the first time I've actually spotted pointless fucking copypasta while scrolling through the front page. Why would you even post this lie?

>brother buys sly cooper one day
>mother doesnt really like videogames but she occasionally tries one out
>This was one of them
>she ends up taking the playstation away from us and takes it into her room and 100 precents the damned thing
>she did this for the next two games in the series
>never did this with any other game, just sly cooper
shit was weird as hell

>>268598117
At least she didn't use Eddy.

>>268598053
I really was.

Also I hated my step dad because you know, parents got divorced and then this asshole shows up and he's way old fashioned compared to my old dad.

It was a rough transition.

>>268598172
>THINK ANON
FUCK YOU BIFF

>Mother plays games sometimes
>Skips all the text and cutscenes
>''ANON WHERE DO I GO NEXT!?''
>Never tries fighting bosses, instantly gives me the controller

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>>268593823
>Sister just sits in her room all day and surfs tumblr
>Stops going to school
>Gains a fuck ton of weight
>Mom can't figure out why she's MYSTERIOUSLY depressed and sick all the time
>She isn't depressed, mom is just blind to everything concerning her, but that's beside the point
>Try to get her into video games so she has some sort of an outlet, anything
>Really likes portal, asks where to get it
>Give her my free copy, set her up with a steam account
>She loves it
>AwshitIdidit
>Buy her some of the games on her wish list come Christmas
>Doesn't touch them
>Ask why
>Gives me her trade mark 'you're a god damn idiot fuck off' stupid stare
>Goes back to the usual routine of 'muh depression' and 'life is hard waaa'
Seriously, fuck her.

>>268598464
Sly made her hot.

>>268596676
...Andrew?

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>>268593823

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>>268593823
Fuck, that episode describes every normal father perfectly.

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>>268598889
>implying any normal father has hands like these
Filename related

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>>268593823
>have cousin
>super chill
>brother I wish I had
>known him since birth (like he was there at the bed when mum was released from pregnant bay to regular room)
>See him as much as I can
>Live ~2 hours away from each other
>Every time we have ever seen each other we play vidya until the sun comes up
>Every time we see each other now we get drunk and play vidya
>Best memory is running through Halo 3 and finding all the skulls with the fucker then beating the shit out of faggots on multiplayer with hayabusa armor
>Used to try and find ways to break forge
>Introduced me to 4chan
>Introduced me to racing games
>let me use his xbox360 before I had one
>Planning on getting an apartment with him when we can get the money for it
> also me and him roasted a chick on a spit in a sweet devil's 3some. When it was over we sent her out then proceeded to get drunk and play some vidya. Good-ass times, son
>MFW I've known my best bro for all my life

I'll sum up my experiences with my dad by saying that he played Diablo 1 co-op with me when I was four and that he designed what's still the best Timesplitters 2 map on my memory card. My mom used to play N64 platformers and Rollercoaster Tycoon all the time. Neither of them really play video games now, but I bought my dad the new XCOM for Christmas last year and he stayed up until 2:00 am every night playing it until he went back to work after vacation.

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>>268599329
>Mfw I had the same level of bro
>Mfw we had the same plans to get an apartment together
>Mfw I got replace with a wom

>>268594783
We used to watch our stepdad play Tomb Raider 1 as well. Other games he's beaten include Doom and motherfucking Mike Tyson's Punch Out!! One of the hardest bosses in vidya history.

I can't beat my dad's high score at Wii Sports Resort basketball.

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>>268598464
why this game, did you ever ask her? Maybe she's secretly a furry.

>>268598334
Sure, I'll run my PC out to the TV and set up Higan. He'll love Mega Man 2 and Super Ghouls n' Ghosts. We can even play Street Fighter 2.

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>>268598717
never cater to the sjw

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>Used to watch my dad play Thief and Hitman
>Shit was comfy
>Played shit like Vigilante 8 and SMB3 together and he'd help me with vidya if I got stuck on something
>Mom played shit like DAoC all the time, had multiple level 50s
>They no longer play video games except for my mom who just plays the Sims now

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>>268600793
I tried to save her anon.

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>>268600384
I have a feeling it may go the same way with me. He's still with the chick we boned, but he's in "love" with her. we're both still teenagers ffs.
I'm going into a job with an actual wage soon and he's still in college. I just want vidya and booze with my bro instead of this mind stealing alien with boobs

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>>268601024
Holy fuck, are you me anon?

I'm busting my balls working and he's bitching an moaning that his parents stopped giving him 60$ on request.

>>268601234
>>268601024
Never EVER get an apartment with someone who isn't making money. It doesn't matter how good of friends you are to how much you trust them. Don't do it.

>>268600961
It's too late. She's one of them anon. Let her go

>>268600805
> Father son vigilante 8

Those are some fond memories anon.

I like this thread.

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>mfw i'm the only person in my family who cares the slightest about vidya
At least I can raise my kids with the games I used to pl-
>my kids
oh...
huh...

>>268593823
My dad would play Hitman Silent Assassin and CoD when we had the Gamecube, there was also one time he got addicted to Mario Kart for a couple of weeks. He hasn't played anything since we moved and I got my own TV though.

My mom's lucky if she can find the start button on the controller.

>>268598334
My oldest cousin by about 10 years had a n64 before all of us other cousins. Whenever we had family gatherings we'd take turns playing Ooc or Mario part in his room. The guy was such a bro about it. He'd probably like nothing more to hang out with his friends and GF but he'd give us about an hour or two of his time before he went out.

i wish I had the courage to ask him about questions about love and life when I was a teen. Now that ship has sailed. He was he big brother I always wanted

>>268601596
I did.
I cut my losses and never looked back. She wants to crash and burn? That's her problem.

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>any female character shows up in game
>"Is that your girlfriend anon?"

>>268596309
i feel you

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>all these posts and no stories about sexual deviancy
When did you faggots get so boring?

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>>268601916
Dont remind me

they did that to me all the way until I was 16

>>268601916
They know, anon.
They know about your waifu.

>Be a youngin
>Have paper route, saving up for N64
>Finally have enough to buy one!
>Fuck yes, go to Funcoland (holy fuck I am aging myself)
>Buy it!
>Shit...no extra money for game
>Sad now
>Dad says its almost my birthday, buys me mario kart 64
>Fuck yeah again!
>Get home, he hooks it up
>We play some versus on luigi's raceway
>Even matchups
>He figures out aiming green shells pretty quick
>He just gets behind me and pings me over and over
>Eventually, he gets so far ahead, he stops in front of the finish line
>And waits
>And just before I cross, he finishes ahead of me
>In reverse
>And he laughs his ass off
>A year or two ago, I was visiting for the holidays
>Brought the N64 down from the attic and hooked it up
>He tried to do the same shit
>Still thought it was hilarious

>>268598273
noice

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>playing Black on the ps2
>dad walks in
>says the same old same old
>"Gee whiz with you shooting like that I wouldn't want you on my side"
>let him play
>he struggles but gets the hang of it
>notice he keeps shooting the dead bodies in the head
>"dad what are you doing"

>"I'm not stupid, anon, I could have just winged one of those guys and he could be coming back for me later on"

>>268597786
>watching a movie
>character uses heavy profanity often
>explicit sex
>parents don't bat an eye
>playing a game
>one character says hell only once
>parents flip their shit

I will never understand it.

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>>268602047
I didn't turn into a sex deviant who jerks off to tentacles and other eldrich abomination porn until long after I left home, and I'm not stupid enough to browse 4chan at work so I don't have any whuacky stories about my parents or employer finding my porn collection, sorry.

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>earliest memory is sitting in my dad's lap playing Super Mario Bros while he was off work with a broken foot
Simpler times. Now I have three kids and they're all fucking crazy for Smash Bros.

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>Get Journey for PS3
>Decide to play it through for the first time one afternoon
>In living room on 60 inch tv
>Mom comes into the living room about 2 levels in
>"What's this, Anon?"
>"It's a game called Journey."
>She usually does crosswords or reads or whatever, but now she can't stop staring at the game
>"This is really cool, Anon!" "Ooh, wow, how nice it looks!" "Watch out!" "Who's that?"
>tfw both of us experience this game for the first time together
>Game ends, she's really fascinated, as am I
>She still asks about it today

She's seen me and all my brothers play games our whole lives, we've owned most consoles, but she never really payed any attention to it. I remember when I was little, playing A Link To The Past, she said to my dads friend: "I don't know how they do this so well" and chuckled.

Maybe I'll play Journey soon again.

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>mom still lived at home for a few years after having me
>mfw sitting in her bedroom watching her play the DKC games
>mfw she made up vulgar nicknames for levels that gave her a hard time

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>>268602502

He knows whats what. That should be a game feature.

>>268602424
>tried to do the same shit
lol

>>268601883
You should talk to her instead of thinking Portal would help her

>>268602424
That's extremely funny

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>Visit mom
>She knows I play vidya
>Really excited over game commercial she saw on TV, wants to play together
>First time we'd ever play a game together, get kind of excited
>Manage to find the trailer she saw based on the description, it's a live action Destiny trailer
>Watching through it, she's excited, my suspicion is growing
>You don't think these are the actual graphics, right?
>She did
>Will never play a game with my mom

>no stories of having sex with your parents
4 shame, 4chan

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>Just got a 3DS XL
>Dad thinks it's pretty cool
>Show him how the touch screen works
>Load up game notes for him to try
>Draws a tic tac toe board and we play

I haven't played with my Dad since I was a kid so it was special.

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>>268602848
My parents would tell me to "turn that shit off" or take it to another room

>TFW your parents have a negative opinion on vidya games

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>>268602424
>He tried to do the same shit

>Have an old MAME emulator on a windows 98 PC
>Dad tells me he used to play in arcades all the time
>My dad is fucking insane at Dig-Dug
>like he can play for hours and never die
>he's absolute shit at every other game
>Playing Dig-Dug made him really happy, he got really into it
>work started picking up
>hasn't played in forever
>seems sadder
Help /v/, I'm thinking of buying him an arcade stick or something

>Grandparents would always spoil me and my brother with vidya
>Grandma never played games
>Grandad only played one series: Lolo on NES
>beat all 3 games and would save all the level passwords
>By save I mean wrote them all down on a notepad, every single one
>remember watching him play and beat the games and telling me how each monster/hazard worked and how to get around them
>he passed away in 2007 a month before I graduated high school
>Still have that notebook full of lolo passwords
>play through lolo games once in a while in remembrance

>family mentally abused me for years
>became a bit of a shut in because my family would either ignore me or tell me I was useless/annoying them
>Family can't understand why I'm not a social butterfly
>Work a summer to build my own computer
>Dad is super happy that I'm saving up for something
>Is happy that I managed to build a computer
>3 months later hates me any time I'm actually using it

Fuck you dad

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>Father was huge into Doom, Quake, and Duke Nukem
>Would punish me by NOT playing Duke Nukem- I would watch him play all the time and he'd stop playing so I would do school work
>Gives me my own PC when I am 8
>My first 3D graphics card comes a week later
>Teaches me how to connect to his friends FTP servers, start my own FTP server, and make websites
>Sets up a Quake II server in our basement
>Lets me play Quake II online
>He shows me his scores- he's in the top 10 rated Quake II players during the winter-spring of '99
>We'd spend hours together raiding shit in Diablo 1 and DIablo 2

>Fast forward 12 years later
>Does nothing but stream shitty TV on a PC that I gave him.
>Doesn't play any games anymore, says it's too hard to concentrate and hurts his wrist
>Not excited for Diablo 3 at all, which turned out to be a good thing
>Not excited about anything game related
>Doesn't even know what kind of GPU's are out anymore

The worst part is now that he's asking for a divorce and leaving the family I know for sure we'll never play games again, and every day that goes by I fear I'll lose another memory of us playing video games together.

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>>268603626

>>268603151
You'd get more conversation out of a tree.

>>268602848
boring game and same progression plot as flower

>>268602701
Same here, anon. My kids love watching me play MK7, Smash, and Sonic.

However, when I play Smash, they beg me to use Mega Man and Dr.Mario, two characters I'm terrible with. They have destoyed my online record.

Its worth it though. Being a dad and bonding with your kids through vidya is the fucking best.

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>>268596510
i know man

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>Tfw was an immigrant
>Used to play the Atari and Genesis alone back in my hometown
>Dad bought a Gamecube when we immigrated to Canada
>Always used to sit with him and watch him play Mario Sunshine, Pitfall TLE, Metroid Prime, and loads of other games
>Would occasionally play Multiplayer games with him
>Dad finds a job and two twins were coming
>Gets busy
>Never plays vidya anymore

Those were some fun times playing games with my Dad man

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My dad's watched me play some TF2 before. He thinks it's hilarious, and loves watching me play as Heavy. Probably because as Heavy all I do is try to get taunt kills via holiday punch and use voice commands.

>>268604623
>>268604626
sunset hivemind

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>my mom never even wanted to play video games
>my dad died when I was just a baby so I never got to know him
>my mother hated video games because she thought it was toxic and made for "shitheads and killers"
>every time I would play SSB64 with brother and my sister my mom would yell at me.
>"anon, stop playing that fucking video game! it makes you retarded!"
>the only way I got games were by saving up all my allowance and through my relatives giving me video games.
>the only people who actually play video games are my brother and my sister.
>mfw I could never play/ buy vidya without my mom calling me a shithead or a retard.
I'm so glad I moved out of my house.
>all she would say to me back when I was in high school was "Why can you get better hobbies/grades!"
>"why do you hang out with those people!?"
I'm so glad I moved out.

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>>268601425
>>268601234

My bad, by "soon" I meant when we both have living/semi living wages. He currently has a job that he busts his balls in but it's nowhere near living wage. Ain't no way I'm living with someone that can't pay room and board
I'm still stuck in dead end minimum wage hell, but it's looking up soon.
"soon" = ~2 years

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>>268604023
>oh shit, dat image
someone have the link of the video

>>268604614
They all like to play, mostly together without me because I beat them every time, but sometimes they're up for a 3vs1. Only thing is, they have a list like ten characters long of people I'm not supposed to use because I'm too good as them.
>Samus
>Little Mac
>Mega Man
>Bowser Jr
>Robin
>Shulk
>Ike
>Greninja
Probably a few more I'm forgetting.

>>268604832
Fucking mobile ruined my post.

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>>268604623
>>268604626
HE STOLE MY FAVORITE TRICK!

>>268604854
Who is this semen demon?

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>Streets of Rage Bro-Op with dad
>First stage has dominatrix lookin' ladies with whips
>Punch that bitch.
>Don't tell your mom I taught you that word ok son

>>268594152
Hello Jessica Raine Moser.

>>268604350
Giving up on family values so easy? Ahh, good goyim. Giving up is the most easy and time efficient method

>>268593823
>I realize.

>>268604931
I figured they would want me to play sonic, as I used to play Generations and Unleashed as a treat for them Saturday nights if they were good. They fucking love Sonic.

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My parents are pretty casual but they love video games. My dad really likes shooters even though he's pretty terrible at them, he plays a lot of Battlefield 4 on his PS4 and at first spent most of his time waiting to shoot a Stinger or a SMAW at any vehicle that enters his line of sight. He's done a decent job of gitting gud since then, though, in my opinion.

Mom loves anything with zombies in it. My dad got her hooked playing Nazi Zombies on World At War ages ago, so much so they bought all the map packs just for the zombie levels. They'd get so into it they'd wake me up at like 2 in the morning to ask for strategies for whatever map they were on. They still play it today.

She loves the Telltale Walking Dead series, as well. Got a pretty good story out of her playing it, too. Spoilers for anyone who hasn't played Season 1 yet.

>mom playing Season 1 Episode 2
>progress is slow but I try to give her subtle hints where to go
>Eventually it's dinnertime at the farmhouse
>she's investigating upstairs
>takes forever
>so long all the tension of sneaking around upstairs is gone
>think to myself "Man, kind of ruins the mood when there's no pressure to rush and get downstairs like I thought there was-"
>Ma calls out "Lee, get down here! Some folks are already having seconds! Hee hee!"
>mfw
>Mom finally figures out how to get behind the bookshelf
>hfw she sees legless Mark and puts two and two together
>races downstairs
>Clementine happily eating
>our faces

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>>268593823

>baby cousin sitting on my lap while I play that mini-game of Kirby Super Star where you have to punch some matts.

>baby cousin randomly presses buttons of my controller.

>Manages to land a perfect punch that breaks the dreamland in half.

She's now a fat slob who wants to become a musician and lives in a cramped apartment.

>>268593823
Me and Dad used to play doom one and xcom together. I miss dad.

>>268605321
My two older ones used to watch me play racing games and such, youngest has a huge kid boner for simulated violence, especially Serious Sam and such.

>>268602701

honestly I wish more games had the option of playing local multiplayer with just 1 cartridge.

by the time my kids start caring about online they should get a job to buy their goddamn games.

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>Dad used to love Galaga and Wrecking Crew
>mom emulates shmups
She has shit taste

>>268604832
Parents are always wrong. Us independent children, amirite anon? :^)

>>268605806
It would be nice, yeah. I have a few that are decent for local. I do worry a lot about them playing online. Not a place for little girls, you know?

>>268605287
>You read like me.

>>268600668
Isn't there a starfox story just like this? What is about having kids that make women wanna fuck animals?

>>268604939

no, you're a shithead and a retard.

stop blaming the slave children who built your phone

Dad started to be a huge nerd after he gave me a PS1. Since then, he buys almost every console that i buy as well.

He loves sony. He has a thing for japanese ladies. My dad will probably be the oldest person to ever become a weabo and this is great holy shit

>>268605998

nintendo's online features are such a joke that I wouldn't really worry about your little girls.

Direct interaction between players is impossible in most of their games.

>>268606115

you should go to japan, get him lots of a viagra and some high quality japanese whores

this is the least you could do for your father.

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I've been able to get my dad into shooters somewhat.

The funny thing is, when he's playing he throws himself around the couch like he's trying to dodge the imaginary bullets. It's pretty hilarious to watch.

>>268605660
Both of mine are still toddlers, so I won't let them watch met play those games, mainly because I remember getting some serious nightmares from Doom.

I just enjoy the look of sheer joy they get when I boot up Sonic. Its so fucking satisfying.

>>268606310
Yeah, that's why I'm okay with the 3DSes, but the internet in general fucking scares me now that I have them running around.

>>268606582
My two oldest are 8 and the youngest is 6, he just loves the fucking violent stuff. Hasn't acted out or I'd cut him off from watching me. I only even let him because I played DOOM and such at a fairly young age. Plus Serious Sam can make the blood fairly goofy, like green, or rainbows, or stuff like that. It's really just a kid watching me use goofy guns to turn goofy aliens into goofy blood.

>>268606593

there should be a 4chan summer camp for kids to harden their skin before venturing to darker places in the Internet

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0Bhb6wXYSOY

>>268606873
I'm more worried about them ending up on whatever the new Stickam equivalent is. Part of why I don't own a webcam.

My dad still to this day kicks my ass at Soul Calibur. I have no clue how.

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>>268606873
>touching is good
was that seriously their slogan?

>>268593823

>Dad loved video games
>was the person who got me interested in them
>we would always end up talking about them, or playing them and trying to figure out how to beat stuff
>there was a block buster not too far from where we lived, and right next to it was a chinese restaurant
>every 2 weeks friday night we had the same ritual
>a little while after he got home from work we would get in his truck, head to the Chinese food place and put in our order
>we went next door to block buster, and we would always pick out one game and one movie
>we would get our food, head home, and stay up late eating, watching movies, and playing video games
>rest of the weekend was spent trying to beat it as quickly as possible together, before we had to return the rental.

My entire childhood essentially revolved around waiting for that Friday.

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> playing bible black in my room
> Get to the first H scene
> Slowly start to pull cock out
> Step mom comes in asking if I want anything from the store
> looks at my screen
> "Honey what are you doing? You can't be playing this garbage"
> "oh s-shit sorry glenda"
> Step mom shakes her head and looks at screen some more
> "I swear what is it with the men in this family and cartoon porn"
> Dazed and kinda out of shock that she almost saw my cock i just kinda shrug and laugh
> Glenda kinda looks at me and shakes her head again, notices my zipper.
> "anon its 7 at night jesus we are having dinner in a hour!"
> Apologize and close game feeling embarrassed
> Dinner was a awkward mess.
> Step mom dosen't say anything
> After dinner go to room
> A few minutes later glenda comes in.
> "Your dad went out to hang out with his friends tonight. Want to tell me what you were playing?"
> "oh... just a story book game called bible black"
> "oh I think I saw your dad watch that one once except it was a cartoon. Care to show me?"
> Im fucking flabbergasted
> "Y-yeah..umm sure"
> Boot up the game
> its the scene where the green haired girl masturbates for the whole class
> "Thats not what a real woman looks like"
> Suddenly glenda slides her hand into my pants and wraps her fingers around my cock
> "You get off to this shit? I cant believe it"
> Cock all the sudden stiffens
> "Keep going in your story book you fucking pervert"
> She bites my ear and continues jerking me off
> mfw we managed to get the ending where I end up selling drugs and whoring the girls out.

They ended up divorcing but we still see each other from time to time.

>>268607067

lack of webcam doesn't stop me from catfishing straight guys with manycam.

>>268607990
Yeah, but I'm not worried about them pissing guys off, I'm worried about them posing naked or something.

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>>268607547

>>268608263

I don't do it to piss off guys. I do it to have a fapping folder full of qt boyos.

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>>268607547

>>268609002
Well I'm not really worried about that either.

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>>268607547
Uhhhhhhhhhhh that's pretty trashy

>>268606845
That actually sounds fucking awesome. I just recently got into horror/violent games like the Walking Dead, Gears of War, and Alien: isolation, and my wife has gotten nightmares from each, so I obviously shouldn't let my kids watch it.still, I like knowing that I can play more family- friendly games and enjoy them, and have my kids enjoy them more than I do.

Seriously, they giggle and get so excited when I play a game they love. It's the fucking best thing in the world to them, so much that they can't contain it. It warms my heart every time I hear it.>>268606845
Axpowsl connected

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>>268607547
you are lucky

>>268609619
Mine love Smash Bros more than anything else, it seems like. Nice playing with them, but sometimes I just want a gorefest. Halloween is coming up, as an example, and I love to replay FEAR on Halloween. Can't this year since it's my turn to take the kids out. I might take the day after off so I can stay up late and play it.

>>268609314
Who is this semen demon

>>268593823
My mom actually payed attention to the game ratings and that's about it.

>During the school holidays, my mum would take my sisters and me to a shopping center where we'd see our Grandmother, Aunties and Cousins
>After the shopping center, we'd all go back to my Grandmothers place for dinner
>She had a Super Nintendo so we could all play it if it was a rainy day
>We'd take turns, typical you die, pass the controller rule.
>Street Fighter 2
>Cousin keeps spamming Hadoken with Ryu
>Finally gets to my turn, choose Vega
>End up sliding, jumping around, avoiding him and beating him
>Round 2
>Do the same
>Cousin flips out, swings the controller into my head, jumps on me and starts wailing on me
>Mum, Grandmother and aunties come into the room wondering what the fuck is going on
>End up ripping him off of me and carrying him into the room they were in, he's screaming bloody murder this whole time

That was just one story in regards to that cousin and vidya.

>>268610036
>>268610036
That's their current. YAY MY FAVORITE GAME right now, and I try to use Dr.Mario and Mega Man to make them happy. I usually use my mains afterward to try to make up for my record, though.

>Dad always been into racing games
>Has a setup with wheel, gearstick and pedals
>pretty casual but it works good
>plays euro truck simulator about 2 nights before christmas when Im at his house
>"cmon dad it cant be that good"
>end up spending the whole of christmas day playing it and getting help from him

You guys would love my dad /v/

My dad plays Red Dead Redemption and Left 4 Dead 2. My mom use to play Animal Crossing gamecube when back when.

>>268612115
I think RDR was the first and only game my dad showed interest in. Probably for the western cowboy theme.

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>>268595524

based gribble

>>268597505
Eric?

Grandma liked Super Mario Bros but never able to beat it. Grandpa still gambles and he likes card games and stuff on PC but not "true games". Also chess, he's played it since he was 10.

My mom played some Spyro during PS1 days. She actually beat Pokemon Red. Nowadays just plays Facebook games and stuff like that.

Got my dad to play with me couple of times as a kid. He played max 15 minutes and that was it, couldn't get him into games. Brother has gamed his entire life like me but our tastes are pretty different, he mostly plays online games and mostly on PC. Nowadays LOL, used to play Enemy Territory, Runescape etc. owns still an Xbox 360 but doesn't use it, used to play some COD and Halo.

>playing Morrowind on xbox because I'm an idiot back then
>dad walks in behind me
>sees me swingingly wildly at foes and not hit them
>says the sword noise sounds like a woof
>tell him he's hearing things
>says whatever and leaves
>any time I play a game with a sword in it, he walks behind me and goes woof
>he has never stopped since then

And now I can never unhear the woof noise.

>>268598717

the only reason she liked portal was because "MUH CAKE IS A LIE XD XD TUMBLR"

>sister used to always watch me play games
>especially JRPGs
>she buys Lunar 2 Eternal Blue for herself but wants me to play it for her
>we have a lot of fun talking about the story and finishing the game togethor

it was nice

My grandpa fucking loves bayonetta, I have no idea why.

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>playing battlefront 2
>dad walks in
>"are ya winni- holy shit is that star wars?
>"y-yeah"
>"I WANNA PLAY"
>"lets kill each other son, you be on the opposite team"
>he gets obi wan at the start of the match
>he fucking dominates with him
>"hey son look I can push people around"
>"n-nice"
>mfw he didn't die even once

>>268615374
That sounds great.

>>268615597
>no idea why

Come on anon.

>>268615597
The same reason most men love Bayonetta.

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>>268615597
>I have no idea why

>>268615597
> no idea why
Because she's stuck in a man's body and playing bayo empowers her, duh

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>>268607547

>>268598273
>>"Isn't that mario guy's games always the same shit? Why does anyone keep buying them."

I bet your grandma browses /v/
Is she hot?

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I want to preface this by saying that I love my father and he is the best man I've ever known. Really made up for how awful the rest of the family was.
>1996, 10 years old
>I had been shoveling snow for one or two months and was house sitting for a family away on Christmas vacation back in 1995, saving up for a PS1
>I finally got it along with WipEout, Rayman, Tekken, and Resident Evil
>Just enjoyed it by myself for a few days, was going to invite friends over the next day
>Then my piece of shit older brother came into my room, he was 13 at the time
>I was playing Rayman
>He asked me what the fuck I was doing and said that it was fucking retarded
>He ripped out my PS1 and motherfucking broke it over my bedpost, grinning at me while doing it
>WHAT THE FUCK WHY YOU PIECE OF SHIT I'LL KILL YOU
>I flew into a goddamned rage and didn't care how immature I looked, I flew straight at him and started punching him as hard as possible on the floor
>All of a sudden my dad was pulling me off of him
>I told him how my brother came in and just broke my fucking PS1 that I had spent my own fucking earned money on
>He went off on my brother so furiously, it was glorious
>"You know why I believe him over you!? It's because this isn't the first time you've pulled shit like this! I have more trust in Anon than you. You can't have such blatant disrespect for another person's property. He worked hard to get that, I saw how hard he worked. And it was expensive. You're going to fucking pay for this and then some. For the next four months, you're going to be put to work replacing his console and buying him any games he wants, out of your own pocket. There are consequences for destroying another persons property. And if I so much as see you scratch something belonging to someone else, I'll sell everything you fucking own. Then I'll take that money and hold a party for everyone that you won't be invited to!"

And he didn't pull any more shit. Felt so good.

My grandma stole my copy of Fallout 3

>>268620540
Could be worse, she could have taken a game worth having.

>>268620656

I know but it was still annoying

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>>268619498
holy shit anon you dad is based

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>Me and my little brother have similar taste in games as kids, always playing multiplayer together I still play PC games and 3DS with him sometimes, but it's hard when you don't see each other often and he's dedicated 80% of his waking hours to WoW
>But we both knew the more the merrier
>Constantly trying to get mom and dad to play simple games like Smash Bros, Mario Kart, and later Kirby Air Ride with us
>Mom was more compliant since she just took care of us all day, but she was noticeably terrible and sometimes got motion sickness
>Dad wasn't awful at games, but only played with us once or twice a year at most
>A few years later, mom is introduced to the DS
>Starts babysitting my Nintendogs while at school
>"You should play more games like this anon, instead of your violent games like that one" (she says, the latter game being Bomberman - and not the 360 version)
>Eventually becomes a hardcore Animal Crossing addict
>A habit she never gave up to this day, she even bought herself a 3DS without telling me just for New Leaf when it came out
>Whenever I see her we go visit each others' New Leaf towns hers is much nicer than mine
>Meanwhile dad hasn't touched a game since me and my brother forced him to in like 2004
There have been a few times when I really feel like he'd enjoy games if he tried them. He is super into sci-fi, and just anything with the least amount of time travel is amazing to him. I remember playing through Mario and Luigi: Partners in Time for the first time, and I happened to have the guidebook with me. My dad sat next to me on the couch, picked it up, and asked me if the game was about time travel. I said yes, and he started reading the guidebook. And that was just a silly Mario and Luigi game. I'm sure there are tons of games with fuller sci-fi plots he'd go crazy for, but he's just too busy and now too old to try.

>>268598889
dad_walks_in.gif

>>268619498
>House sitting at age 10
...???

My parents didn't even let me sit my own house until I was 12

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>>268596309
i know this feel anon

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>>268594152
>my mom is in love with mother

My old brother (14y older, i'm 20) was playing a lot during his youth and obv i was with him.
> Started vidya with Amiga CD32
> Looked at him playing Tomb Raider 1/2/3, Shenmue, MGS 2 all the day and sometimes tried myself
> mfw he introduced me in vidya and offered me so much games. One special christmas i received a GBA from him with Wario Land 4 (didn't even heard of it) he bought one for him too to play with me.
> Our matches on Virtua Tennis on Dreamcast was amazing, especially with the Black Boss OP tennisman (secret one) we unlocked together.
> When he got the PS2 it was with Gran Turismo 3 and i enjoyed so much to watch him playing the round circuits 10 hours long he was like an idol for me.
> He had such a good taste in vidya so now i'm happy to had this chance but life has changed
> ~10 years ago he moved out with his girl and from that day it became like hard for us to pass time together. I used to live like 5 years ignoring him cause of that cause i didn't want to understand. 1 year ago he got a baby.
> I always thought he dropped the vidya from his life even if he had a PS3 he didn't play it for years.
> MFW MGS V GZ came out and remembered me such a lot of souvenirs but made me sad in the end. It's like my prefered vidya licence because of our plays. His birthday came out but as always didn't offer him anything. One week later he cale home to visit and i made him play Mario Kart 8 and i was stunned he enjoyed it. Introduce my will of offering him MGS GZ for his birthday and he told me that he would really like to play and said he misses vidya.
> It exploded in my head i couldn't believe it, like i got back my old brother seriously i was close to cry when i wrote this and obv i didn't explain everything about our good moments in my youth cause there is so much but yeah it was awesome.

>dad skips cut-scenes and tutorials
>says story gets in the way of the game
>"OH MY GOD WHAT WAS I SUPPOSED TO DO"
>always shit literal DSP
>never quits just gets angrier
he platinums every game he plays

>Dad used to play warcraft 2/3 and starcraft, then we started playing everquest until sony fucked up his credit card info and he got really upset, luckily it happened around the time WoW came out and he played with me up until cataclysm, now i just play alone
>Mom used to play animal crossing city folk but got bored once she did everything in-game

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>>268595524
>yfw he's right

My dad and I still play old N64 games together when I visit

My grandma, who is a 72 year old Chinese woman who grew up in rural China during the Mao years, plays the shit of crash bandicoot.

>>268621764
sounds like an awesome guy

Used to play Diablo 2 with my dad over lan from my room to his. I was always too afraid to fight andariel with him so I'd stay back while he slayed. Those were the good ol' days.

>>268623548
no
no
god no
3 months to beat human revolution
not even platinum, the first playthrough
4 hours every weeknight
it was so painful

>>268593823
My mom loved playing tetris and q-bert. That was about it.

A little while after my dad got a laptop from his work and he'd bring it home we started playing stuff like prince of persia and quake together

>>268623719
how long for plat?

>leave door to house open for some reason
>come back 10 minutes later
>dad says nigger stole our snes
>2 years later my dad gives it back

>>268623895
6 months total
he got better
i was honestly surprised he got the no kill trophy
i shoundn't complain to much
hes pretty good at coop shooters like sniper leit

>>268603363
Fuck off degenerate

>>268619498
>I'll sell everything you fucking own. Then I'll take that money and hold a party for everyone that you won't be invited to!

Oh my god, that's so fucking mean.

Your dad is so fucking cool!

>be 4 years old
>watch mom play tetris all night like some sort of tetris wizard God
>play super mario bros with dad during the day when hes not working, was always upset that we could never jump over the flag pole
>some years pass
>be 9 years old
>little brother is born
>he is sometimes kept in the same room as me while in his cradle, watching me play n64 games
>grows up to play nintendo games with me
>always have a player 2 buddy
>parents begin to hate video games all together
>complain that it is all we do
>meanwhile they watch tv for hours on end, somehow thats alright but vidya is the devil
>be 23
>the process has not changed at all, little brother is doing just fine in school, finished college, looking for a job. Parents still love us to death but never want to play vidya

:( why did it stop.

>>268598717
you sister sounds like my worthless ex girlfriend

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>>268595524

THEY'RE ON TO US!

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>>268598275
o-ok anon

>>268596717

Thats not fucked up. Thats normal.

Fucked up is watching dad shoot up heroine talkin' about how fucking good it was then going into a drug-coma lying on the floor while you play Vidya (It was Super Metroid btw)

Jesus you are such a pussy.

>2011 try to get mom into gaming
>think something simple like katamari
>Get her that for her birthday (i remembered that year)
>try to show her the ropes
>start playing it on my own
>really like the new one and play a whole lot
FUCK
>mom only played for an hour and never played it again
fast forward
>New leaf comes out
>buy her the poptart 3ds
>plays everyday
>really likes the 3ds
>starts buying her own games
>plays a lot of layton games
well i couldn't get he on a console but a 3ds is good enough
but now i am afeared that i need to move out because i only play games around her

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>Dad and I playing Tekken
>He picks Anna
>Mom gets mad

Not me, but I remember a while back in a thread like this:

>kid Anon and his dad go to some toy store in the late 90s/early 2000s
>Pokemon: Gold/Silver were the big shit
>his dad is looking at something, Anon spots a Lugia doll and goes up to it
>fucking farts on it
>thinks it's the funniest shit
>proceeds to fart on various other toys
>store clerk comes up to him pissed
>"YOU HAVE TO BUY EVERYTHING YOU FARTED ON"
>Anon's dad isn't amused, thinks he's being ridiculous
>Anon walks away from the store with a brand new Lugia doll and the experience of farting on toys

Fart thread?

>>268628536
just... talk about video games, please.

>homeschooled but ignored by family pretty much all the time
>besides studying vidya is all I have
>we live in the middle of nowhere so 0 social interaction
>grow up used to do nothing but vidya and sleep
>Finally manage to make some friends with similar interests and situation
>trying really hard to maintain friendships and study a language
>"Anon how could his happen why don't you go out more you need a girlfriend"
>they still refuse to play vidya with me

>>268629093
Your parents are beyond retarded and I grew up pretty much the same way, so I feel your pain. If you ever have kids, please be good to them unlike your parents were.

>Demon's Souls just came out
>playing it in my room
>first time fighting against Storm King after several tries
>suddenly dad walks in
>he's watching what I'm doing ans showing genuine interest
>he sits besides me
>accidentally sits on top of the TV remote and shuts it off
>quickly turns it on again
>YOU DIED
>"Oh my god I'm so sorry, son"
>I just stare at him
>don't get mad and just tell him that he has to beat Storm King now

I was frustrated but I understood he just wanted to take a look to what I was playing. He played it then and a few times after, asking me for advice from time to time.
I just told him to get better.

>Father was obsessed with Goldeneye 64
>Every night he would play the Caverns over and over
>Eventually he tried it on Secret Agent
>2 hours later he was speedrunning on 00 Agent
>Kicked my ass every time in multiplayer. I always played as Oddjob.
>A few years later and he can clear the entire game on 00 Agent in one night
>Gets into a car crash and his head gets fucked up, his brain activity begins to deteriorate or something
>His metal shop goes out of business due to medical bills, he moves in with his sister.
>Starts losing the ability to speak, and eventually to move, but still tried his hardest to play.
>Begins to die a lot more because his thumb stops moving every now and then.
>Finally loses all ability to move and dies less than a year later.
>His last spoken words to me were "How do you unlock the Aztec?"

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>around 15 years old
>vidya is most of what i do
>shitty grades all high schoo;
>parents getting angry at me for failing
>become sevearly depressed because no matter how hard i try i always failed
>my only happines from 15-19 was vidya
>now im out of school with shit grades
>mfw i'l never be anything

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My mom stole Unreal Championship from me because she heard one of the characters say "Shit"

I never got it back.

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My dad would occasionally come into the room and watch me for a minute, then chuckle and walk away. Sometimes he would say "What's the appeal?" or ask me what the point of the game was.

I once got him to sit down and try Halo but he couldn't figure out how to use the right thumbstick to look despite my explanations. He just ran around shooting at the sky or the ground, then gave up after 10 minutes or so.

>>268630909
>I just told him to get better.
Fucking faggot

>>268627913
Nobody wants to turn this into a dick measuring contest, but my dad molested my older cousin and the family covered it up. And his brother used to sling drugs out of his pizzeria.

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>>268630947
I don't remember writing this post.

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>at my uncle's funeral
>mom tells me to put away my nintendo 3ds
>i roll my eyes at her
>she snatches it from me
>now i have to listen to this boring eulogy
>start stomping my feet and and chanting "3ds"
>whole church stops and is looking at us
>she's so embarrassed she gives the 3ds back to me
>she took it away mid level so i had to fucking start all over again

Fucking cunt, this is the shit I put up with.

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>Why don't you go and hang out with some friends?
>Why don't you tell me about your friends?
>You're not a NORMAL person!
>You can't just play videogames all day!
>That's not normal!

>you didn't have any friends

My dad would team up with my sister and play 2v2 in halo and halo 2 whenever I had a friend stay the night. We would switch up teams when we eventually whipped their asses. He also had to beat this one level in Bubble Bobble for me whenever I got to it, I would call him down and he would beat it and go back to what he was doing.

My sister used to play everything with me. She was decent at smash, she loved paper mario and we beat the Halo1 co-op campaign together. We were brother and sister who would also get the opposite version of every pokemon game. I would always have to show her where to go, but I didnt mind it.

My mom never played, and took them away from me when I got bad grades, but she never berated me too hard for playing them a lot. She would be the one to take me to gamestop so I could buy what I wanted though, so I always appreciated her for that

Neither of them play anymore but Ill give them a shoutout for playing video games with me during my childhood. Thanks dad and Syd, you guys are pretty cool.

>>268630909
and people say that PCfags invented the the term "git gud"

>>268631539
>mfw i'l never have a fellow depressed NEET to hang out with
life just gets shitter

>>268631675
Literally 14.

>Really young, can't really remember age, but I'd guess 6 to 7-ish.
>Played through Sly Cooper 1 and part of 2 with my mom.
>Mom let me watch her play Silent Hill.
>Dad played Devil May Cry and Abe's Odessy with me.
>Mom started to get busy with work and eventually dropped video games.
>"Why do you like these violent video games, Anon?"
>Dad still plays vidya.

>Dad is playing Destiny all the time
>Mom is waiting for Arkham Knight

Too bad they're casuals.

>>268632437
Well after about a year and a half of NEETdom (this is after I flunked out of community college) I managed to get a job due to family connections. It's not much better than being a NEET really, since it's part time and dead end. I transitioned from terrible depression into a mentality of just not really giving a fuck and trying to enjoy the things that mad me happy and just endure everything else. Hang in there, lil buddy.

>>268632987
You're much lcukier than me, i haven't been able to get a job in 5 years, no one wants me in the family they all own land and had good jobs and i have the literel lowest grades the education system here offers

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>>268632987
>flunked out of community college
>managed to get a job due to family connections
>I transitioned from terrible depression into a mentality of just not really giving a fuck and trying to enjoy the things that mad me happy and just endure everything else
...oh god...this is what I've become...I've never even been a NEET...sweet Christ...this shouldn't be happening, I'm only 20

>>268596839
I'm not sure you understand passive aggressive parents.

>>268632987
>Family job that's part-time and dead end.

Oh boy do I know this feeling. They don't even pay me.

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>dad has played only CoD for like 8 fucking years straight
>completely blows ass at it
>will not play any other game at all because he's too stupid to learn a new control scheme

>>268596839
>"Wow anon, what a great game! It looks like it really gives you some deep choices and in so proud of you for thinking about these things and sharing your unique view with us! I love you!
>saying I love you in a sarcastic comment
No offence to you anon, but wow what a bitch.

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>>268630935
I... I'm sorry, Anon

>>268633157
Well shit, man. I suggest you talk to whatever family member seems to hate you the least and tell them you really want to start working, then ask for help with that. If they don't have useful connections, they might be able to convince another family member to help you out. My grades were total shit too. I only passed chemistry and physics because I cheated on everything, and in algebra my teacher talked to me after class on the last day and showed me that I was going to fail the class, then just added a couple points to my grade because they didn't want me there the next year.
I suggest applying at Fedex and UPS as a package handler. The job requires zero skill and they hire genuine retards. There's also an incredibly high washout rate because it sucks, so they always need new people.

>>268633414
Two years ahead of you, man. Kinda wishing I had joined the military straight out of HS.

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>I was at my Ethiopian friend's house a few years ago
>We played fifa for a few hours and his dad came in and sat with us.
>We played in silence for a while, while his dad was watching.
>All of the sudden his dad freaked out and yelled
>"You are controlling those men!"
>"This is a simulation! A game!"

So this dude didn't realize fifa was a videogame until after like 30 minutes of watching.

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>>268598273
>"Isn't that mario guy's games always the same shit? Why does anyone keep buying them."
>"Holy shit, Tony get in here."
>Spend like ten minutes entertaining them.
I'm dying holy fuck

>get the Bioshock games a few years ago
>Bioshock 1
>playing in my basement
>my dad comes down to see what I'm playing
>"oh, cool"
>sits down and watches me
>gets upset when I drain the Little Sisters
>get the bad ending
>"well, that's what happens son."
>Bioshock 2 arrives in the mail maybe 3 weeks later
>"son, don't play it without me"
>save all the Little Sisters now to make him proud
>he gets so excited by the twist ending
I love my pa

>>268633873
>I only passed chemistry and physics because I cheated on everything
i have never sat an exam that i passed, i'm not even fucking stupid i was just really shit at school and now my life is literely worthless

>>268633925
that's pretty cute actually
>tfw I will never ever be as excited about a video game as he was

>>268634074
It's still possible to get a shitty edjamucation at a community college or something, they accept pretty much anyone who can pass the entrance tests. You could also go for a welding certificate or some other such thing that takes less than a year to earn and requires no real academics.

>>268633925

african dads had the best accents

>>268634379
i tried that at 20 and i was kicked out for attempted suicide

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>>268634576
>I was kicked out for touching children
Jesus fucking Christ Anon, get some help

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>>268634735
But annon, that's not what it says

>>268630909
You ruined what could've been a perfectly good moment, you fucking tool.

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>>268633873
>Two years ahead of you, man
How bad is it?
>kinda wishing I had joined the military straight out of HS
The only difference would be that you'd be a /fit/ trained killing machine with no interest in vidya, who's possibly dead from durka's living out Muhammeds wet dream. The military isn't for guys like us anon. There's always a better way, and at least in this life you aren't being shot at by Isis or Taliban as wonder why the fuck you gave up civilian life for this. The military anons have taught me much.
You either regret your service and barely make it out, or you embrace it and become kinda douchey/really motivated at the cost of a touch of PTSD. War is hell.

>Brother comes to my home to poop and kill time because being a taxi driver is boring as fuck.
>After finishing his business says "start up that PES, I wanna play some before going back to work"
>He's nine years older than me and ten years ago he usually won so easily it was ridiculous.
>Now the tides have turned.
>After we pick our teams randomly, he says "Let me win faggot, if you don't I'm gonna get mad and hit my wife when I get home like every time we play"
>He regrets saying this, and adds "Don't tell Mom"
>Ok.
>Mop the floor with his ass, like 5-0
>He leaves
>I feel sorry for his wife, for like 3 seconds.

>>268635306
>How bad is it?
Well like I said, I don't care too much at this point. I recognize it's really bad though. If I don't get my shit together in a year or so I'm probably going to get kicked out and then I'll really be fucked.

>military
My momma didn't raise no fools. I would have joined the navy or something. No way I'm getting blown up in some desert.

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>playing pic related over at a friends house
>we go do something else
>come back and his dad is playing it
>continually dying at the first stage, never gets past boss
>friend keeps asking him to let us play
>just says no every time
>screams_internally.jpg

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>>268635606
>My momma didn't raise no fools. I would have joined the navy or something. No way I'm getting blown up in some desert.
Good man. I was worried for a second.

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>dad only plays top-down strat games because he gets F/TPS simulation sickness
>can't play based coop games with him
>whenever he watches vidya over my shoulder he asks if I'm winning, knowing I'll start fucking up because I get nervous
>HAVING TROUBLE? LOL
>walks away

Motherfucker.

>>268598243
Had a similar thing happen with my brother-in-law, but I was at the REX fight just before Grey Fox sacrifices himself.

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>>268593823

My dad got me into vidya when I was a kid. One of my first memories is of playing Sonic with him when I was too young to use the controller, so he sat me on his lap and had me jump while he used the D-Pad. He spent a ton of time in the arcades when he was a kid himself, but he never really transitioned into modern gaming.

Last Christmas I put some new hardware in my old gaming rig, and gave it to him along with Assassin's Creed: Black Flag. He's just about %100 it now. He says he doesn't want to get another game until he finishes this one.

That's actually the same computer I taught my mom how to pirate movies on, and I got her a DVD player with a USB port so she's been watching every slasher movie ever made for the last few months.

>>268621178
Get him Elite Dangerous, Alien Isolation, and some of the other space games coming out. It got me back into playing video games again.

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My mom played Mario Party with me growing up. She was actually pretty good at spinning the control stick, especially for the Fly Guy wind-up game inside the mini game house.

She also played Animal Crossing: City Folk for a while one time. She even earned up enough Bells to buy one of the entire series from Gracie's (whichever the blue one was). If I had to guess, Animal Crossing's probably one of her favorite games.

I don't know what my Dad plays because I've never met him.

>dad had a PC and peripherals set up to simulate some 90's F1 game
Top tier taste dad.

>>268636117
>motherfucker
subtle

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>playing Dark Souls
>fighting 4 fags
>Dad walks in
What the fuck are those things?
>walks out

Recently I found a mothers day card I gave to my mother when I was 5ish
it had said "I wish my mom would play video games with me" -happy mothers day
I think the only game she's ever played was brainage

>>268619498
Motherfucker you need to take him out for a nice steak dinner, buy him a bottle of scotch, and then paint the town red. If the evening doesn't end with you two covered in vomit and imprisoned, you have failed as a son.

>>Have SNES
>>Playing Wings 2: Aces High
>>Visiting uncle watches me play, gets excited during the bombing raid missions
>>Tells me about his job as a bomb loader while we take turns playing
And
>>Goldeneye 64, fuck yeah
>>Replaying the game for the fuck of it
>>Dad notices the game, has never seen an FPS before, watches for a bit
>>Asks if he can play, which surprises me because he's never cared about games before
>>Three hours later, he's still playing
>>Being all tacticool, peeking from behind walls and hiding behind boxes and stuff
>>I mention there's multiplayer, and he immediately challenges me
>>He's gonna get rinsed, I play this shit all the time
>>Dad fucking floors me in three games, because I was an impatient little shit and he was a level-headed bastard
>>He calls me a cheap cocksucker when I kill him with a mine
>>First time he ever swore at me, we're bonding

>>268630909
My mother gets in front of the screen during an online match, but then again, I don't freak out over getting killed because it's Blops2 so it's no skin off my nose, and I just quit out the game if it was Demon's or Dark Souls. Try playing Demon's Souls on a CRT, fucking text is so tiny it's impossible to read anything.

>>268593823

My uncle said that i should sell my games.

I politely told him no, he continued to try and convince me so i told him to fuck off.

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>When my mom was a housewife still she would play all the time on my ps1 when I was at school because
>no internet
>She always played Resident Evil and Frogger
>She used to knife the shit out of everything on RE
>"Hey anon you know why I love the knife?"
>"Why mom"
>"BECAUSE I LOVE THE DIRTY WORK"
>She took over the controller when I got stuck fighting Liquid on top of Rex
>Beats the shit out of liquid
>Get ps2
>She kind of stops playing video games but every morning her and I would play one match of Tekken 4 before dropping me off at school
Love you mom

>>268631367
was she hot?

>>268639927
>>"Hey anon you know why I love the knife?"
>>"Why mom"
>>"BECAUSE I LOVE THE DIRTY WORK"
Holy shit, your mother is an assassin.

I'd watch my dad play Heroes of Might and Magic 2 and Age of Empires 1&2. Eventually I began to play with him and he'd teach me how to play. I was about 3-4. They were the first games I ever played. He's the reason I got into video games.

>dad asks why all I do in my games is just run around
>asks if I know where I'm going
>Does he know where he's going?

>>268631367

Everyone slings drugs out of pizzarias. That's like, the second-most important thing pizzarias sell, after garlic bread.

>>268597437

>super mario world came out when i was 7

i want relative to myself underaged to pls go

>parents show no interest in video games
>tfw never gonna play a round of mario kart with them before they croak

>>268640535
Not the one my brother was semi-adopted into after being arrested and having to go through drug rehabilitation. Best Italians I will ever know, though their son is kind of an asshole.

>Playing some M&B Napoleonic Warfare
>Walking in line with my regiment
>''WHY AREN'T YOU CHARGING?''
>''STOP AND SHOOT''
I swear my dad is a CoD kiddie

maybe tonight ill finally kill myself

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>>268640609
>tfw the future is now

>every once in a while my dad would rape me
>bought me vidya to compensate

I can't say thinking about my dad and vidya together are good memories

>>268640609
>>>/bed, grandpa/

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>>268595537
This is a good story.

>>268593823
My dad used to come home from work and yell Hadoken then proceed to kick my ass at Street Fighter 2 or Mortal Kombat for a couple of hours before he'd prepare dinner. I imagine he is one of the only 64 year olds on the planet that can FADC into an Ultra in Street Fighter 4. Christmas turns into an all out fighting game marathon between us and my two other brothers. He just bought a Wii U and an Xbone so Id imagine this year will be a Smash and Killer Instinct tournament.

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>>268595537
> W-wanna get d-drunk and play it with me dad?
You smooth motherfucker.

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>mom watches me play a game
>"anon what are you doing? Why are you going there"
>"because the king is an asshole and we are going to over throw him"
>"anon why are you killing that guy"
>"because he was going to report us"
>"how do you know?"
>"because it was the mission"
>"but how do you know?"
>"because the rebels found out"
>"how do you know they aren't lying? what if he has a family?"
>"so what? he chose this life"
>"so you would kill me if I was going to tell the king about you?"
>mfw

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>>268604931
>They can't beat Megaman in Smash 4

Your kids are casuals.

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I've told this story before but I think it's interesting enough to post again. My dad is a grizzled immigrant from Iran, a stony man who came from almost nothing. He has never shown even a passing interest in vidya. Except once.

>Late 90's
>Dad comes home with an ear to ear smile
>Plops down a brand new Playstation.
>Even bought a Playstation polo
>Didn't buy extra controllers, or memory cards, or any other peripherals
>Just Rayman
>Fucking Rayman
>My dad played fucking Rayman all the goddamned time
>3 am? Before work? After work? Rayman
>This bastard played Rayman at least 30 hours a week
>No memory card, didn't understand the password system, he just went as far as he could each time he turned the system on

This shit went on for months. I liked Rayman, but I didn't like it as much as my dad did. This guy had sold opium, outran the police in a Camaro, and had never worked for anyone but himself for his entire life. I had no clue why he loved the game so much, but he was completely enamored by it.

>Months passed
>Slowly stopped playing Rayman
>Hasn't played vidya since

That was over a decade ago. Sometimes, he'll still wear that same polo. And when I ask him about Rayman, his eyes lock with mine and he says "What's Rayman?"

Love you, Dad

I've played Hyrule Warriors with my mother for quite a while. She enjoys looking at all the video games I play, we're going to celebrate the release of Bayonetta 2 on thursday and looking forward to it. She's quite bro.