>in concession line for cooler filled with melted butter at cinéma
>The guard in the watchtower shines his searchlight on me
>>87336026
He didn't buy the AMC quikpass that gets you priority in the penis inspection line.
>already two falcons on the theater ark
>have to disguise mine to prevent him drowning in the flood
>complimentary ball waxing service is out of order so as an alternative they use hot butter and falcon claws to shave your pubes
>It's "free the nipple" day at the kinoplex
My favorite kind of thread
>>87336026
>all along the watchtower starts playing
>out of soap in the showers
>enter kino smelling of falcon chow
>am the unanimous choice to be sacrificed to the kino shaman during third intermission
>attend kinoplexiumacopia
>purchase billet de ciné per une
>get very strange looks because of my poor pronunciation but get waved through
>realize i forget my avian raptor
>evade the gestapo and make my way to seat
>transfluid whale-body-kin xerson of color has taken my seat to displace my privilege
>forced to sit in alleyway next to unchecked birds of prey
>three hours of commercials and i need to empty my bladder after all the soylent cola
>can't leave because shooter has entered theatré
>shooter shoots up theatré
>theatré goers all applaud shooter
>theatré goers all tip shooter
>have to go to hospital for operation
>bill comes to $500,000 plus falcon lodging expenses
>forced to applaud doctors
>return home
>fap to traps
all in all it was an excellent korean new year's
>>87336026
h-how are you alive?
>try to bypass the mandatory Lick-Lena-Dunham's pussy line in order to get into the trailer room
>they catch me and force me to raise a child with her
>>87337652
Really makes you think...
>visiting my local cinema/shootout zone
>order two tickets because of no singles policy
>say my date will arrive later
>guard give me a doubtful look but let me pass
>got two good seats all by myself
>lights turns off
>pre movie commercials start
>goes on for 45 minutes
>pre movie trailers start
>each trailer is 15 minutes and basically show the whole plot of the movie
>owner of the cinema holds a speech and congratulates every birthday kid in the audience
>the shooter is 15 minutes late
>shows up but had forgotten his ammo
>no birthday shootout for the birthday kids
>the audience is booing for a good 20 minutes
>the cinema sumo wrestler hits the gong
>"finally!" I think to myself
>nope, it's the pre movie circus show starting
>get up and leave, download a screener of the movie instead
>go up to food counter
>ask robert for lobster claws and melted butter
>it turns out my kinokard is out of kinokash and robert kicks me out
>>87336026
dead meme
>>87340535
kill yourself namefag