Alien Covenant

>>87320687
>people with 50 IQ
you mean ADHD Millennials?

>>87320687
Edgy robot man was kinda fun I guess

Because it never tried to be anything but what it was. A cheesy nostalgia fueled summer horror flick. Anyone looking for something more or deeper was just deluding themselves.

liked it, lets say 6/10, but as separate random space movie. it had nothing to do with alien universe, beside shitting on both alien and prometheus at same time.
but idioticy of PLANET COLONISING mission leaders just went out of any possible standards. im used to characters doing something dumb, but not at THIS level

>>87321331

I've rewatched it a few times looking for positives. Each time I come away with something more dumb.

>>87321120
Best part of the movie, but not in the way that was intended

>>87321039
I don't know what ADHD has to do with that. Everything in Covenant was extremely straight forward and literally raped your face with stupid references like Ozymandias.
It was never subtle or smart, everything was extremely predictable and dumb as hell.

>>87321105
>Edgy robot man was kinda fun I guess

Even David acting like a psycho robot was disappointing as fuck. I was expecting him to actually have some depth. But fuck no, there was nothing about it. Nothing about engineers and their homeplanet, his stupid motive was to nuke the humanity in the end and that's all.

And the final """""""TWIST""""""""""" was just insulting honestly. Like how incredibly retarded you should be to not recognize David? HIS FUCKING ARM HAD NO ACID SCAR AND WAS REMOVED WITH A KNIFE. That stupid bitch even looked at it several times and no, she didn't fucking recognize him.

I'm shocked at how everyone was stupid and suicidal in this movie. They truly deserve to die. They are not humans but lemmings.
Their brain cells fried in that starting scene it seems.

>>87320687
[Spoiler] slippery blood [/spoiler]

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>>87321120
>Because it never tried to be anything but what it was. A cheesy nostalgia fueled summer horror flick. Anyone looking for something more or deeper was just deluding themselves.

Fucking Alien Isolation has better scenario, plot and suspense than Prometheus + Covenant combined.

Ridley Scott needs to die already, fucking hack is good for nothing. At least he's not directing Blade Runner so there's a chance for it to not be complete dogshit.

>>87321495

Even beyond the humans, surely the mother computer would know, wouldn't it? And how'd he get Walter's codes? How'd he make facehugger embryos on that planet? How'd Shaw fix him with no parts? And why?

I'm sad that none of the crew talked about their bonus situation to the captain. Shit movie.

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>>87321539
God why did you remind me about it, I almost forgot it already.

>walk in with a rifle
>banana on the floor
>dumb bitch slips
>fucking blows up the entire ship with retarded gunfire
>fucking refuses to let the other bitch get out despite the fact that she had the blood on her own fucking face as well so quarantine was impossible already
>dumb bitch inside couldn't fucking deal with a cat-sized monster who could be stomped to death by any non-retarded person

But the best part of this movie was with their RELIGIOUS CAPTAIN - I fucking swear they did it on purpose, their goal was to make fun of religious people and make them look like total imbeciles

>see fishy as fuck creepy android standing near the alien monster who just killed your buddy
>android does nothing and is not trying to help or fight it
>android yells at you and bitches about you killing the fucking monster
>hey nigga follow me I have something to show you
>literally baits him LIKE A FUCKING KID with candies
>retard follows him
>hey nigga put your face in a TOTALLY NOT SUSPICIOUS OPENING EGG
>it is safe I swear lmao
>he does that
>obviously David could just force him to face-fuck the egg but no, the retard does everything without any help

Fucking hell this is insulting as shit.
I'm reading a lot of sci-fi and no one is THAT retarded in any decent book.

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>>87321706
>can we talk about the bonus situation?
What did he mean by this?

>>87320687

You can't, it was even worse than Prometheus, and that's almost impossible.

Apparently you have to be braindead to be picked as a crew member for a spaceship in the future.

>>87321928

You forgot the part where he drops all the mission data to David after just meeting him. You'd think there would be some level of op-sec.

>>87320687
I might have missed something; was it ever explained why David wasn't a disembodied head like he was at the end of Prometheus?

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>>87321638
>Even beyond the humans, surely the mother computer would know, wouldn't it?

Of course she would, they are not even the same models. Walter was the next generation.

They've brought a total stranger on board with no codes or access and the retarded AI didn't even notice that.
I have no fucking clue how can he know the codes too, it's literally IMPOSSIBLE and I don't believe that he could somehow hack Walter and steal them.

The only part I'm still interested about is what the fuck did he do with Shaw - perhaps he used her womb to make eggs or some shit.

Engineers are disappointing as shit, thank you Ridley. Fucking ooga booga ogres who lived in stone caves. Jesus christ.

If the characters hadn't been so stupid I would have enjoyed it way more. I found the new captain of the ship the most interesting besides David and Walther, but Ridley has to kill him off in such a stupid way. And what the fuck was the purpose of the Engineers? I had hoped we would see way more of them than just a simple flashback.

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>>87321495

It's not even recognizing David outright, it's the fact that last they knew two nearly identical robots were fighting each other to the death.

One comes back and they never do ANYTHING at all to confirm that it's actually the non-genocidal one and just hand over the keys to the ship and get ready for hypernaps.

EVEN AFTER a fucking alien somehow made its way onto the ship and their little robot companion does jack fucking shit to help they still trust the guy.

It's so far beyond retarded that I'm not convinced Scott wasn't trolling everyone. "You though running in-line with a falling ship was dumb, I'll show you fucking dumb."

>>87322277

The Engineers and Shaw/David were the most interesting things about Prometheus.

>8ft tall humanoids capable of terraforming, energy weapons and interstellar travel

>suddenly they're normal sized and can't into roads

>>87321962

I hate how as soon as the Alien shows up they drop the bonus situation subplot, I was really invested in it and they never bring it up again at all.

Its just bad writing.

What is insane is how this shit gets greenlit, I mean did read the damn script right ? How the fuck can you think this shit storyline would make a good movie ???

And the retarded slapstick, Prometheus = oh my god a sloowly rolling spaceship, I will run straight in it's trajectory until I am crushed, Covenant = opps a pool of blood, I slipped, opps me too!!

It's like the writers are either 12 year olds or they have absolute contempt for moviegoers.

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>unknown planet in a god damn space
>you scanned that part of space but didn't find it
>hey guys it totally looks like a fine place to live let's visit it
>we have no real info or any fucking data from the planet but WHO THE HELL CARES JUST LAND THERE
>go without ANY FUCKING PROTECTION and breath the air you have no clue about
>you have no clue about any toxins
>any infections
>any viruses
>any bacteria
>you go in with open skin and breath
>retards getting infected and die

I just don't understand.
I don't believe that Ridley Scott can be so stupid or the team that was making the movie.
He does that on purpose and disrespects the viewers, he thinks that only total retards would watch this. Retards who have no fucking idea about some obvious safety measures and protection.

>>87322156

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XeMVrnYNwus

Should have been in the movie, but they released it as a prologue on youtube for some reason.

>>87322493

>put both into the same med pod when only one is sick
>black chick screams to get out
>2 seconds later hugs the guy

>>87322432
Made no sense to me, man. Like you said, those were the most interesting parts. The way their homeworld was shown was so disappointing.

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>>87322277
>>87322432
>super advanced race capable of making all the great technological stuff
>live worse than fucking ancient Greeks and have no visible technology anywhere
>literally live like cave men

Just what the fuck.
>inb4 they are not engineers but some inbred slaves

>hey guys here comes a 2000 year old ship from an abandoned bio warfare facility
>doesnt seem to respond to any communication attempts
>oh well give him free passage to our main city, lets see what the fella wants :^)

>>87322524

>Unknown, uncharted, never researched planet
>Broadcast with John Fucking Denver coming from it
>Not suspicious at all

>>87322630

It only works if the planet in Covenant isn't the homeworld, but another seed world like Earth.

>>87322725

Just you wait, the next movie will reveal that the engineers aren't the space jockeys from the original and they just borrowed the ship of a much older and more advanced race of space jockeys that crafted the engineers to be 1/2 size models of themselves.

It's going to be like some kind of genetic russian nesting doll. The reason the engineers are so pissed is because we made our robots regular size instead of scale models and broke the cycle.

>>87322662
>inb4 the answer to the question I asked

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>>87322412
The first time that what's-her-name bitch gets in a room with David and looks at his cut-off hand I was expecting her to do something about it even if that twist is extremely predictable and retarded but whatever.
Like she'd recognize that it's not Walter and fight him or somehow lock him up somewhere, anything.

BUT INSTEAD SHE DID NOT EVEN RECOGNIZE HIM AT ALL LIKE WHAT THE FUCK.
ARE YOU FUCKING SERIOUS RIDLEY SCOTT

>>87322851

Wouldn't surprise me at all.

After Scott's nanotech bullshit, I'm not even watching the next one.

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>>87322493
>What is insane is how this shit gets greenlit, I mean did read the damn script right ? How the fuck can you think this shit storyline would make a good movie ???

They had that excuse with Prometheus. Like the scenarists fucked up and Ridley dindu nuffin.
The movie was "mediocre" but everyone hoped that with Covenant Ridley would actually get in charge and not fuck up, how can he fuck up twice in a row with a shit scenario?

Guess what, Covenant is EVEN WORSE. There's no excuse. It's old senile Ridley.

>>87321495
t. brainlet

>>87323042

I blamed Prometheus on that fucker from Lost for the longest time. Now I'm convinced Scott played just as much a role.

I was wrong, I was so wrong.

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>>87322715
>there is our guy on that unknown planet wow isn't that COOL?
>if the guy could live there, we can too!
>wait for us buddy we are coming :---DDDDD

fucking epic

Can we have Blindsight movie adaptation by a non-retarded director and scenarist?

>>87322851

There will be no next movie in this series, Covenant did so bad that Fox no longer want Ridley Scott's 'vision' for Alien.

Expect a reboot in 2-3 years, one that likely won't even pretend Prometheus or Covenant exist.

>>87323253

I'm ok with covenant not existing, but I like a lot of aspects from Prometheus and respect it as canon.

>>87320687
>How can you defend this movie?
You don't, not only this is a bad movie with shit writing but it completely demystifies a great movie, the Space Jockey is a joke now.

At the photography is good and some scenes are actually quite alright.

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>video game based on a movie is unironically better than Prometheus and Covenant made by the same fucking director who filmed the first Alien

Irony

>>87323425

>daughter of ellen ripley

Dropped.

>Scott wants to put Ripley's mom in the next one

WTF is with this obsession with Ripley? This isn't fucking Halloween.

>>87323717
>Dropped.

Dumbass.
There's more suspense and art style in this game than in Covenant, Prometheus and Alien 4 combined.
The game is perfect reference to the first movie in every single way, the alien is deadly and the plot is not so painfully stupid.
The game was terrifying to play and very tense, I greatly enjoyed it.

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>>87322702
yeah if this wasnt the dumbest shit in the alien universe i dont know what was

and im talking AVP was less fucking retarded with its slasher shit than this fucking crap

>>87322702
>>87323873
Maybe they were in such a degenerate state that they stopped caring about any threats already and lost the technology to make ships as well.

I don't want to advocate this shit but looking at how Ridley is portraying the jockeys - they are like monks who abandoned the civilization and live as exiles now.
I don't want to believe that this planet was their normal planet.

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>Ridley has lost it

He never had it to begin with. Dan O'Bannon was the reason Alien was so good.

Scott is just another George Lucas, a big name who takes credit for the hard work and talents of other people.

>>87321589
>Fucking Alien Isolation
You say that as if Isolation was bad in the first place.

>>87323717
>Dropped.
she want's to find out what happened to her mom, makes a lot of sense, much more than any motivation the characters in covenant had.

>>87324602
>You say that as if Isolation was bad in the first place.

I made it sound like that on purpose knowing how make retards have prejudice towards video games.

I wouldn't call it a perfect game because of stupid repetitive puzzles but pretty much everything else was just right and top notch.
Even the graphics, art design and optimization.

It's a great game for Alien fans. Alien, not Aliens because it follows the atmosphere of the first movie and not the shooter of the sequel.

>>87322524
>disliking a movie based on the safety measures the fictional characters rely on
sad

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>>87320687
why did this movie look Katherine Waterson a 15 year old boy when in reality she is a top tier mommyfu

>a robots hair grows

Literally the moment I lost all respect for the film and everyone involved

>>87325116

In the future everyone looks like dykes.

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It needed more pic related

>>87325311
>the best character dies off screen

>unknown alien planet, obvz safe guys
>they can't trust a... MAN OF FAITH
>let me smell this alien turd mushroom real close
>ah but isn't man the real monster? :^)
>ROBOT FIGHT
someone should be in prison for this

>>87325595
I fully support the criminalization of bad films

>>87325311
Wow she could beat me up in a fight

engineers and prometheus were a mistake, you just cannot salvage that crap

>>87325098
>disliking a movie that treats you like a retard who wouldn't complain about stupid stuff like no safety measures

Yeah it was a comedy for teenagers right, not a serious sci-fi movie.

>>87321539
Made me laugh.
> it happens a second time.