Got S8-Theon thread

lol he has no pee pee

>>87229744
What did D&D mean by this?

>>87229744
>Tee hee Theon has no pee pee

Why do normies find it funny?

>>87229698
>he will die
No he will sit on the iron throne

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>>87229824
Do they? Seemed more like straight up (pic related) to me.

Having him be utterly broken by Ramsay is interesting and all, but his redemption arc is pure fanservice and against everything the overall story tried to be about.

keep him cowardly, keep him unredeemed, keep him hated. Stick to at least 1 fucking character arc holy shit.

>>87230093
The best case scenario is the sea stone chair

But I would not be disappointed if he was the one who got the iron throne

>>87229799
He's transitioning, shitlord. He'll be back in season 8 as Theona and come out as a lesbian.

>>87230169

Why are all the main contenders for the throne either unable or unlikely to have children. Weird how tha tkeeps happening

>>87230220
I wouldn't put it past them.

This shitshow needs to be putoutof its misery.

>>87230229
Yeah I don't know what to make of it, realistically you would think their followers would want someone on the throne who could have hiers

>>87230266

Yeah it needs to make room for the 4 spinoffs/prequels/reboots already in the works

>>87230328
Can't wait for that
It will be got with absolutely no help from George. It will be so successful

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>>87230328
The Fabulous Adolescent Womyn Warriors of Winterfell coming soon.


It's not TV, it's HBO

>>87230403

I actually want this to be a thing just for /tv/'s reaction.

There's literally no reason for this character still being alive (or any other fuck from the iron islands, desu)

Varys and Theon will be the only men standing, while either Dany or Arya takes the throne.

>>87230588
But they are pirates
You think pirates are cool right annon?

>>87230636
They are literally not. Davo's black friend is an actual pirate.

>>87230663
How are they not pirates
And yes sallahdor is pretty cool

>>87229799
Don't you mean GRRM?

>"What is dead may never die, but rises again, harder and stronger."
My theory:
He's gonna grow a golden penis.

>>87231074
You beat me
That's better
It all makes sense now

>>87230987
Nope. '''they''' put the fat man on hiatus years ago.

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LMAO... He vanquishes the army of the dead and gets his penis back. Theon is Prince that is promised... this is rumored to be one of the 3 speculative "sodomy demon-awful" endings. It is the one that sucks the least for me.... I would rather have a try hard come out on top then end the lives of any of my furry friends.

>>87231103
So Theon still has his cock in the books?

>>87231192

>yfw D&D are leaking different versions of S8 to see which gets the best response so they can film it

wouldn't put it past them

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>>87231097
>>87231074

>>87231243
Mate u wouldn't happen to have any links ay-wot?

>>87231344

These are by far the worst leaks I read, and probably the least likely:

http://www.desinerd.co.in/game-of-thrones/

Grey Worm proves that you don't need a penis to find love (with a woman)

>Grey worm
>Greyjoy

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>>87231214
Yes, but it's not used for site-gag propaganda.

See also: Euron getting stabed in the dick for literally no reason.

Game of (Pic Related)

>>87229824
Dude no one finds it more funny than the writers.
>The scene where he is thrice kicked in the dick by that big fucker
You see, I myself found it powerful in many respects. Even invoking the Drowned Man owth. But I believe on the day of the season 8 finale... we will come together and find comfort in laughing at his lack of peepee for 4 seasons.

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>war is over
>massive losses but the humans won
>scene shifts to the iron islands, where Yara rules after Theon killed Euron
>Yara mentions that the winter is gone
>Theon freezes up, then, after a brief pause turns to Yara
>Theon, what's wrong
>Theon, as if fighting someone in his head, says "no, not Theon"
>Reek?
>Theon, now calm, replies no, not Reek
>it is I, Ramsey! I copied my consciousness into your brother and laid dormant until the threat of the white walkers was gone and the kingdoms weakened, to be awoken by a secret saying
>Yara, shocked, replies winter..
>exactly
>the Theon you thought returned has been a fake all along
>this *pulls off dick-hiding codpiece*, is just a fake as well
>with blinding speed Theon-Ramsey decapitates Yara
>he then sits on the throne and calls a guard
>guard, call the maester, tell him to get 20 ravens ready
>I need to send a message, to 20 good men
>the kingdoms are ripe for the picking
>close-up on Theon-Ramsey, sudden cut to black

>>87231747
I can see the funny side in it like the time you just mentioned or a good smart joke.

What I mean is why is the concept enough to make people laugh.

The sansa rape jokes were pretty funny but just saying lol she got raped isn't enough to and it's the same with Theon

>>87231435

He apparently has a penis, just no balls

>>87231844
I always thought in the book he cut of the dick but left the balls leaving him with the temptations but no way to release himself

>>87231382
The season 7 leak there proved to be true though.

>>87231756

>Literally MGS plot

Liquid Theon

>>87231756
Fan service?

>>87231898
I think he was talking about Grey Worm. Can't really remember what it says about the unsullied in the book, if they have a prebuescent penis or if everything is gone. Can't really remember with Theon either. Varys definitelly does not have any genitals at all. No cock. No balls.

>>87232139
Unsullied have nothing I remember that
Daneyres talks to the Slave master about it

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>>87229698

He should find post-rape Yara (pregnant with Euron's baby) sacrificed in a dark magic ritual. Then he gets captures, and is sacrificed too all while Euron mocks the gods and the Ironborn.

>>87232298
HBO shoehorn incest into the plot? That's unpossible.

Some damn good ideas and thoughts anon, but like you said, it seems D&D are at a bit of a loss with theon at this point. Hopefully I'm wrong though, I'd love for them to see his character's fullest potential until the end

>>87232298

No, no, no. They must be sacrificed together, tied to the prow of the ship Silence while Theon hopelessly attempts to comfort Yara while their souls get slowly eaten by demons and Euron presents himself dressed in Valyrian Steel Armor.

>>87232422
Yep
I mean just look at how they handled little finger

>>87232531
>So the amazing sample chapter but with Theon?
Makes sense d&d are looking for material

Also if yara is lesbians would cutting out her tounge be the same as what happened to Theon

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>>87232298
>>87232531

>Euron did not lie. He has been to Valyria. No wonder he was mad.

>“Your Grace,” said Torwold Browntooth. “I have the priests. What do you want done with them?”

>“Bind them to the prows,” Euron commanded. “My brother on the Silence. Take one for yourself. Let them dice for the others, one to a ship. Let them feel the spray, the kiss of the Drowned God, wet and salty.”

>This time, the mutes did not drag him below. Instead, they lashed him to the prow of the Silence beside her figurehead, a naked maiden slim and strong with outstretched arms and windblown hair...but no mouth below her nose.

>They bound Aeron Damphair tight with strips of leather that would shrink when wet, clad only in his beard and breechclout. The Crow’s Eye spoke a command; a black sail was raised, lines were cast off, and the Silence backed away from shore to the slow beat of the oarmaster’s drum, her oars rising and dipping and rising again, churning the water. Above them, the castle was burning, flames licking from the open windows.

>When they were well out to sea, Euron returned to him. “Brother,” he said, “you look forlorn. I have a gift for you.” He beckoned, and two of his bastard sons dragged the woman forward and bound her to the prow on the other side of the figurehead. Naked as the mouthless maiden, her smooth belly just beginning to swell with the child she was carrying, her cheeks red with tears, she did not struggle as the boys tightened her bonds. Her hair hung down in front of her face, but Aeron knew her all the same.

>“Falia Flowers,” he called. “Have courage, girl! All this will be over soon, and we will feast together in the Drowned God’s watery halls.”

>The girl raised up her head, but made no answer. She has no tongue to answer with, Damphair knew.

>He licked his lips, and tasted salt.

>>87232783
Can sample chapters be kino

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YxQYLWljCvI

>>87232534
haven't seen it yet, but I hear it may have been mishandled slightly

>>87233848
>slightly
wew

>>87230229
Because it means that whoever wins the peace won't last as the thrones are contested
Round and round we go forever

>>87232783
instead we got
VALYRIAN
STEEL
COCK