>What's your longest relationship? How do you answer, /tv/?

The best advice is fake it til you make it my virgin friend
You had a complicated relationship on and off for a couple of years that ended around six months ago and you'd rather not talk about it because of sensitive feelings. Make up whatever details you want just be sure to remember them in case it comes up again later
Never ever tell a girl you're still a wizard or never had a proper relationship

I've been on 4chan for ten years

I finally told my girlfriend I want to watch her poop. She took it well, she even tried to go for me right then but couldn't get anything to come out. I was so stressed about the day I would tell her but it really is a non issue. She thought I was going to tell her I was into something like rape porn or snuff movies so she was actually relieved too. I just like watching a girl shit, I do have a thing for them on the toilet specifically but I would love to see her squat and go, especially if we were outdoors or something. My video preferences are ones where a hot girl is on the toilet but you can see it coming out, like when they lean forward and are filmed from the back. if anyone has any questions I'd be happy to answer them.

>>87103410
The correct answer is to say you were in a committed relationship for about 2 years. This is to show that you're capable of commitment without inferring that you were married or engaged or anything which could see the other girl still having influence over you.

>>87103719
Pooping is gross but piss fetish is cool with me
Do you do piss stuff with her or are you into that

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>>87103410
About 50k years. That's when my Karmic consciousness first connected to the Devine spirit of Her Majesty the Goddess of the Cosmic Mind. Over 720 reincarnations on nearly as many planets, she has guided me to a greater awareness that OP is a fag.

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>>87103410
How could he be so unhappy with this? Also, the director is black - what did he mean by this scene?

>>87104676
It sets up his comfortableness with his naked form and shows that his sex addiction isn't caused by a lack of penis size or discomfort with nakedness. Instead it helps to later stress that his sex addiction is caused by deeper psychological and emotional turmoil.

>>87104868
Except he wasn't a sex addict, he was a normal guy.

>>87103672
>everybody must be a virgin because I am
Never gonna make it bro

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>>87104952
great read dumbass

>>87104676
>Michael assbender

>>87103410

>thats really none of your business you whore nigger. now lets get out of here do some coke and start fucking

Like 9 months as bf/gf, 18 more months as friends with benefits.

It was great and she was wicked hot

>>87104676
SWINGIN DICK

>>87104676
wtf why didn't he wipe his dick dry
all the piss is gonna drop everywhere

>>87103410
30 years with the same partner only cheated once after a fryer accident she had to stay under bandages but we got back at it eventually.

Well, for my girlfriend and I: We started talking, dating, etc... standard relationship. Really grew out feelings for one another. We would discuss our sexual desires and one time I told her that I think it's hot when girls fart. Which is true, I love confident girls who don't care, or even want people to know if they fart. I also told her I was into facesitting, and letting her control her pleasure. Then I suggested we mix the two. Now she's goes out of her way to bend over and fart on me. She'll ask me to lick her ass when she's gassy. She'll even have me sniff her butt while she's laying in bed. I think she's just turned on by turning me on and just likes making me horny.

Tl;dr: Fell in love, developed a fart fetish with my girlfriend.

>>87104676
How do i get a belly like that?

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does Fassbender have jungle fever?