Lets discuss what piece of shit this flick was

It was a solid 7/10, I'm sure /tv/ will realize this eventually.

>>86757320
thot it was pretty decent atc

7-7.5/10

she has perfect nipples though

>>86757320
I'm unironically wondering, what did people not like about this film?

>>86757320
Makes Prometheus look like Citizen Kane. Pure dogshit.

>>86757320
>the ultimate pleb filter
thank fuck i'm not a pleb

>>86757459
It's lack of focus. The studio wanted it to be an Alien remake and Scott wanted it to be a sequel to Prometheus. He tried to do both and it turned out like shit.

File: katherine-waterston-52nd-new-york-film-festival-01.jpg (95KB, 698x1000px) Image search: [Google]

95KB, 698x1000px

>>86757419
Proofs?

>>86757577
She honestly looks better with the dyke haircut.

>>86757459
retconning the original alien (the ship found in alien is hundreds of years old, the engineer is at least 12 feet tall)
danny mcbride
james franco
shoehorned religious themes
small forced pockets of heavy exposition that only create more questions than answered
criminal underuse of guy pearce
katherine waterston with disgusting short hair when she looks fantastic with long hair
protomorphs
almost no noomi rapace
no satisfactory plot answers
tiring allusions to great works of art that clearly exceed the artistic integrity of the film (Bocklin's Isle of the Dead for Shaw's funeral site, Wagner, Shelley, John Denver)
>>86757419
holy fucking shit yes she does, I jerked off to the sex scene in Inherent Vice literally in the theatre

>>86757577
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=grm-lf7kHRI

>>86757675
gumdrop nipples

>>86757675
what a fucking whore

File: 1502765386687.jpg (892KB, 730x1080px) Image search: [Google]

892KB, 730x1080px

>>86757675
Absolutely nice

>>86757623
Danny McBride was surprisingly one if the few good parts in the movie.
And Franco is not even in the movie aside for that one video she watches on the tablet for 10 seconds

>>86757675
I LIKE TO

>>86757675
HOL UP

So she blew that old guy and then walked out like nothing happened? WHAT A WHORE!

Based Fassbendet is the saving grace of this shitshow, its worth watching only if for all the David/Walter scenes
>ill do the fingering

>>86757753
>>86757757
>>86757796
>>86757892
>>86757910
in Inherent Vice she gets completely naked, then starts lay across Joaquin's lap while narrating how hard she cucked him for some sleazy upscale richboy who basically passed her around. She begins him to hatefuck and spank her and then Joaquin gives it to her doggystyle

>>86758010
>watching meme pyncheon flicks
nah

I just watched it earlier. What was so bad about it? Wasn't great but felt better then a lot of shit these days.

>>86757929
>people like homo-bots
>people like characters more transparently evil than fucking Burke

>>86758418
>Dabid
>evil
Hes just the next evolutionary step

>>86757320
It was a terrible Alien movie, but it was pure Android Kino.

>>86757320
I'm just waiting for the inevitable Peter Weyland cameo in the new Blade Runner.

It felt like a B tier horror syfy movie with Alien and Prometheus shoehorned in. Fassbender was great though. but still, what the fuck. and the engineer ship from the first Alien movie is still not explained.

>>86757577
those are some lowwww-set boobies

Because I don't go to see the alien movies to see an artistic treatise on the nature of man centering on androids. It was a swing and that misunderstood what people wanted to see. If Ridley Scott wants to make an android movie with Fassbender he should just do it and not shove it into a horror movie.

The beginning had potential with the standard if not generic setup from the last few movie where a small team is going through space and finds a weird planet, the characters were decent. Then on the planet it's a cool alien setting until all of a sudden Fassbender shows up and the movie turns into a mishmash of themes and exposition that doesn't matter until they have to escape. The escape scene is overly action movie style and that's a weird new tone to shove in at the last minute. Then the final twist is that Daniel replaces his clone which every single person knew was going to happen as soon as they saw they were the same actor.

This movie should have just been them trying to survive on the engineer planet in the spooky mausoleum cut off from the spaceship

>>86760483
fassbender wasn't that great though, he can't do an American/neutral accent. it was so distracting.

>>86760911
Good post

>>86757320
Solid flick that suffered greatly because of the retarded MUH ALIENS fandom. If Ridley just stuck to his Prometheus story, would've been better. Instead we get 15 different aliens with 15 fight scenes that ultimately have zero consequence on the story. But they had to be there because MUH ALIENS

>>86761547
Blame Fox

>>86761547
ridley originally wanted the classic alien in prometheus, studio wanted to change it.

The last 30 minutes were completely devoid of tension.

Covenant >>>>>> Promehteus
If you disagree you are a pleb and you should leave this board immediately.

they should release a version with deleted scenes, then it will be kino

>>86762949
It would also be 15 minutes long

>>86760911
quality post

>>86757485
But Citizen Kane as garbage.

i'm disappointed that it wasn't about david and shaw going to the engineer's planet

instead of answering some questions raised in prometheus it's all about an android's character, which people didn't really care about

>>86762784
The Thing >>>>>>>>>>>> Anything Alien related
If you disagree you are a pleb and you should leave this board immediately.

>>86763233
>the fing
>even close to 1979 Alien

>>86763408
It exeeds it to the point where Alien is lackluster in comparison.

>>86757623
that's some serious nitpicking
only 3-4 of those points are semi valid criticism

>>86762911
it triggered me that this little fucker was so invincible and super strong

File: idiots 8.webm (3MB, 1400x582px) Image search: [Google]

3MB, 1400x582px

>>86763734
ikr

>>86757320
Honestly all the people that enjoyed this movie just turned their fucking brains off the entire film. Just try and think about all the characters and how un - human they behaved through the entire film. Imagine, you land on an alien planet, you see a plant that sputs what looks like to be a toxic gas cloud out of it asshole mouth thing, and the first reaction you do is go and sniff it? Seriously? Nigga if a guy sees that shit i'd be running the fuck away from it as possible.
Then that fucking sceen where that bitch is carrying the infested guy to the quaranite in the ship even though it probably means everybody will get infected SINEC YOURE ON A FUCKING ALIEN PLANET AND THE GUY IS COUGHING BLOOD AND IS WHITER THEN FUCKING GOT ZOMBIES. I dont know what else to say. When they get in the annunaki town, full of acient shit, dead and frozen people, cool strucutres and alot of shit, THEY DONT EVEN STOP AND ASK ONE QUESTION ABOUT IT. Like nobody gives a fuck, we jsut found an alien civilization and theyre obviously all fucking dead but noT ONE FUCKING QUESTION ABOUT THEM. I dont know, the characters all felt like theyre just their to die and be stupid. They did not behave like normal human beings in the given situations, also it was not scary. Also the whole secret behind elien egneering just turns out to be a fucking edgy cyborg asshole who had nothing better to do in his free time. I may be missrememebering some of these but who gives a shit the movie is garbage anyway

File: dontrun-rcm992x0.jpg (44KB, 720x405px) Image search: [Google]

44KB, 720x405px

for a moment I thought that thumbnail was Alien: Isolation concept art, and then I just realized even more how uninspired this movie is

>>86763844
tfw the art style and general plot for this movie is a better alien movie then what ridley put out and it wasnt even a movie

>Single Alien occasionally showing up and being a threat the protaganist has no hope against in a 1:1 fight
>meanwhile the crises creates tension through the station becoming anarchic creating human drama with other survivors
>the Androids are also a factor with them arguably being even creepier then the Alien

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ov2T-v9sb3Y

This should of been a movie script and not a game

>>86763829
>They did not behave like normal human beings in the given situations
This was exactly the same case in Prometheus, I don't know what people expected, Ridley can't cut it anymore, he's done

>>86763829
Ridleuy tried to shove so much shit in the movie he couldn't afford the screen time to make the crew play hard to get
>we're 1h into the movie and I'm still on the lame philosophy android scene, time to kill someone off quick

>>86763734
women are physically weak

>>86763829

It's because it's more of a traditional Alien movie with all the retarded stupidity of Prometheus put into it.

>>86764852
weaker than some 3kg skinny piece of shit?

>>86757374

As a fiction, it's 7/10 but as a science-fiction, it's 3/10.

>>86765020
>>86764852
It's like in Life where the 2 grams of muscle tissue is somehow enough to completely crush a guys arm while holding him in place

>>86765174
thank god I didn't watch it
I would get so triggered

>>86765174
Another horrible horrible syfy movie.

>>86763844
Alien Isolation is the best thing in the franchise since the first movie

>>86757892
Underrated

>>86765733
This anon gets it

>>86757623
You forgot
>ruining all the mystery and wonder behind the alien species by having it be the fucking creation of a robot instead of just an adaptable race from deep space with mysterious origins
I'd rather have not known

>>86757623
>tiring allusions to great works of art that clearly exceed the artistic integrity of the film (Bocklin's Isle of the Dead for Shaw's funeral site, Wagner, Shelley, John Denver)

Can someone explain the point of these references? I saw a couple of them throughout the movie but they didn't make much sense to me. Are they to imply that David knows of great artistic works and is jealous because he can't create on his own?

>>86766206
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aBLQiFGhteg

david's drive to be a creator raises questions about whether anyone but The Creator, a prime mover, can be as such because we're hopelessly derivative of our fathers, of what came before, of what already is.

david's babies are just reskinned neomorphs with acid blood, he improved them like a robot could solve a rubiks cube

it seems more likely he's severely defective/malfunctioning than is he possessed of genuine inspiration or even an innate sublimity he can project

as a commentary on art and offspring david's the ONLY interesting thing in these trainwreck movies, which is impressive considering this is the same david who the writers had look at a statue of the david and say That Me! :-]