From Memory - Describe the Plot of Avengers: AOU

>>85955246
Ok so like, movie shows us that Avengers have been hunting down this Stroker cunt for a while but they never show us that and they are supposed to be friends now. Also, Widow can apparently calm Hulk for some fucking reason. A couple of quips later and Wanda does some magic shit to Stark to make him feel fear which makes him build Ultron but this never gets adressed later which makes Tony's argument in Civil War invalid by default because he is the cunt who fucking built Ultron in the first place yet acts like it's the Avengers fault that Shitkovia happened.

>>85955246
Tony and Bruce build a robot that is supposed to protect the world but instead it tries to destroy it.

>>85955246
I only remember that Iron Man built an AI that became evil or some shit. Can't really remember what anyone else did besides Quicksilver dying and Hawkeye doing some 4th wall quipping

Iron Man (the main villain of the entire series) tries to end the world but fails thanks to the bravery of Captain America.

>>85955246
The Avengers are fighting HYDRA and invade the base of one of its heads, Baron Strucker. The dangers encountered, which include two superpowered beings, convinces Tony Stark to build a robot that will protect the world: Ultron. Stark and Bruce Banner create the AI out of one of the Infinity Gems, and go party. During the party, Ultron attacks.

Said robot forms a new body for itself and calls itself Ultron. It teams up with the two superpowered beings from before, and sets in motion its plan to destroy the world.

Also, there's a new Avenger introduced named OP, who is able to suck more penises than anyone in the entire multiverse.

-opening scene avengers go through le quips as they kill evil nazi's that have alien technology.
-tony stark gets mind touched as he reaches lokis staff. He can see it now, the foreshadowing for the avengers 3 tm rise of thanos. he reaches out and grasps the scepter showing hes not a cuck.
-blahblahblah fast forward through character exposition and quips. we will build a super a.i to protect the planet.
-super a.i goes evil and announces its intentions to destroy the world crashing the quip party.
-super a.i escapes and starts building super army.
- AVENGERS ASSEMBLE YASSS QUEEEN.
-avengers go through few fight scenes shitty cgi ect...each one gets around 3-5 minutes of screen time.
-now they must face ultron in a giant city but oh wait ultrons new immortal body is being highjack and mad scientested.
-now we have final confrotation in floating city.
-que shots of avengers fighting and quiping, some character exposition, kill off dead end characters, tie up movie with outro.

that was basically avengers 2.

>>85955246
iron man gets paranoid about space invaders and builds a netnanny, it finds out about how humans are the real danger to humans and like all cliched AI, decides genocide is the answer.

Somewhere along the line a power stone helps make another robot into a real boy or something and theres a witch and fastboy.

Then they all fight

>>85955246
"Oh fuck you, Jay. Tony Stark builds a thing... then it goes evil..."

*cut to Mike laughing*

"Then the Avengers have to kill it and Tony Shark..."

"Wait a second, Rich, did you just say Tony Shark?"

*Aids Moby and Jay laugh*

"Fuck you Mike."

"Carry on, Rich"

"So Tony Shark... Oh FUCK!"

*They all laugh at Rich again*

*Rich Throws the Avengers tape on the floor*

>>85955246
i only know ultron wasnt made by gordon pym and thats bs i hate mcu for this.

>>85956263
of the billion things the MCU is not accurate to the comics you're bothered by that one?

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>>85956263
>gordon pym

>>85956263
How is a mere electrical engineer supposed to create something like Ultron?

Dummie

Uh

avengers break into hydra compound and recover loki's staff

scarlet witch gives tony a vision that makes him scared

because he's scared he uses the staff to create ultron with banner

ultron goes rogue

they try to stop ultron

they fail, hulk goes AWOL, tony stops him

avengers hide in farm house

ultron tries to create vision

they intercept him, use jarvis to complete vision, vision is good guy, can lift hammer

final confrontation with ultron, big mindless battle, ultron loses, sokovia ded

how'd i do?

>>85955246
Uh...there's like this battle in the snowy woods for some reason. Tony then accidentally creates a robot that wants a shit ton of Vibranium. The Scarlett Witch and Quick Silver fight The Avengers in a steel mill or something and Witch touches their minds to make them crazy. Then Ultron makes a crazy good body and wants to put his mind in it so flies away in a bakery truck. somewhere in there the hulk goes nuts and a flying city.

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>heroes are presented in the first 15 minutes
>villain plot is built
>villain gets a small victory
>there's a internal conflict between the heroes
>they get their shit together
>they win the battle

That's it, in every capekino movie

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>Tony Stark has PTSD after almost dying in space so he makes a super robot to save the world for him
>The robot goes bad because someone (Loki?) fucks with it and makes it a sarcastic quipbot who wants to kill the world to save it
>For some reason their plan is to make another super robot with an infinity gem, but this time they're going to give it the AI that tells Tony when to pick up his dry cleaning and when he needs an oil change
>For some reason Thor hits it with lightning which makes it a real boy
>They then fight funnybot in a city which almost acts as a meteor and wipes out all life on the surface of the earth
>At some point in this entire ordeal, Scarlett Johanson and the Hulk have a romance (?)
>Some girl with red magic powers and a worse Quicksilver are introduced, and at some point Quicksilver dies
I remember the gist but trying to get any of the minor details only reminds me of how forgettable the whole thing was

>>85955246
Tony blows up the alien wormhole.
The end.

robots tried to take over some slavic country and the avengers stopped them

>>85957230
WROOOOOOOOOOOOOONG

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Avengers:AoU was better than the first one and Avengers: Civil War. But look at this happy dog with his girl.

>>85955246
The Terminator happens and Iron Man and the crew have to stop him.

>>85957291
>ywn see Joss's 3.5 hour KINO cut of age of ultron
Why live?

theres a pointless action scene in the beginning that goes no where
then do some gay little party who can lift the hammer
then ultron comes
they try to track down ultron and then scarlet witch and slavsilver are introduced
hulk vs iron man
something something something
ultron lifts a city and threatens to drop it
the avengers stop him and everyone is saved except slavsilver.
Vision pwns ultron

the end

>they're fighting hydra quip quip quip
>tony gets vision form scarlett witch and bulbs ultron for peace
>ultron does opposite
>uhh quip quip quip
>hawkeye farmhouse with hot wife
>ultron puts jet boots on country
>country is fly
>quip quip
>they defeat ultron somehow
>quip
>new avengers

it was shit

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>>85955246
>Avengers beat up NotNazis, there's a really groanworthy joke where Iron Man says "Good talk" and one of the shot NotNazis says "Not it wasn't"
>Quicksilver and Scarlet Witch are there, too, I guess
>Scarlet Witch walks through the door in a weird, random bit of reversed footage, it looks like an unfinished effect or someone forget it in editing
>Iron Man gets fucked in the head
>Iron Man makes a robot
>The robot isn't based on his brain but somehow acts as if it is because that was in the original script and Whedon never bothered to go back and reread the new draft
>There's a party
>Ultron attacks
>Ultron meets Quicksilver and Scarlet Witch... somehow
>Ultron fucking sucks
>They're in Africa
>Ultron attacks
>Hulk fight
>Also Black Widow wants to fuck Hulk this is so fucking dumb I almost blocked it out of my memory
>I guess they hang out on a farm for a bit with the girl from Freaks and Geeks
>They're in South Korea, and Scarlet Witch and Quicksilver are suddenly surprised to find that Ultron wants to blow up the world... no shit? Wait, Ultron cares about them now? Why?
>Flying truck
>They get Vision because Tony's retardation conveniently works this time
>Black Widow is a damsel in distress, bravo Joss
>A stupid fucking final battle that sucks
>Quicksilver dies for no reason
>It's thankfully over

I remembered way too much. This is the power of autism.

>>85955246
When Tony Stark (Robert Downey Jr.) jump-starts a dormant peacekeeping program, things go terribly awry, forcing him, Thor (Chris Hemsworth), the Incredible Hulk (Mark Ruffalo) and the rest of the Avengers to reassemble. As the fate of Earth hangs in the balance, the team is put to the ultimate test as they battle Ultron, a technological terror hell-bent on human extinction. Along the way, they encounter two mysterious and powerful newcomers, Pietro and Wanda Maximoff.

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The fucking robots were attacking the floating city! FUCK! Oh God, oh God... please help me.

>tony says a bad word
>captain america is like "bro, watch the language lmao" because he's from the 40s

I actually really like AoU. Considering how much studio pressure there was on Joss's head, it's amazing that a movie with so many characters and subplots and exposition doesn't fall flat on its face from the beginning. Yes, it has
>muh quips
>muh cgi
>muh "political plot"
>muh franchise
but I still find it a completely enjoyable crowdpleaser.

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>>85958141
Nice try Joss

>>85955246
I typed out half a synopsis only to realize it was civil war no aou. I think that says a lot

>>85958141
You're entitled to your opinion but I thought it was obnoxious and smacked of Whedon's worst habits.
>Every character having the same "voice" and constant tension-deflating "snarkasm" (not even jokes, just sarcastic and snarky responses to everything)
>Character death as crutch for pathos
>Bad, stilted directing

Beyond that, Ultron is a pathetic non-threat, the conflict is pretty underwhelming, the love plot is terribly handled, and flying truck.

>>85958316
I read a lot of comics, so maybe it's just the low standards I hold these films to. I enjoy them more to see the characters brought to life and
>turn muh brain off
more than anything else, so the whole MCU and nu-Wars franchises feel like perfectly harmless entertainment to me

Some shit referring to one of the sequels I dint saw provides bantz. There's some red dude I've never seen before. Seems like Iron Man is getting stale to me. James Spader plays Ultron, a character I can't imagine being real, partially due his voice actors idiosyncratic nature, partially due to the bland, non-threatening character design and composition. None of his lines particularly stand out. I seem less impressed by the battles compared to the first. Red guy survives? His motives still a mystery. Nothing of true consequence occurred.

>>85955246
something about bad guy(s) trying to end the world and avengers banding together to beat them while spouting quips.

Avengers. In a van. And then a meteor hit. And they ran as fast they could. From giant cat monsters. And then a giant tornado came. And then that's when things got kicked into twelve gear. And what are you gonna do then?