The Epic of Gilgamesh

>>85534597

>a hollywood movie btw

Why would you want to be disappointed?

We did.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fate/stay_night:_Unlimited_Blade_Works_(2010_film)

>>85534661
It honestly seems easy enough to adapt to the big screen if you just focus on the Epic. If they need more content they could always fit the Sumarian poems into the movie

>>85534670
I'm actually surprised by how accurate Fates rendition of Gilgamesh is. Sure them anime him up a bit but you can still see some accuracy

Also:
>DEEN

get that shit out of here

The jews would purposefully fuck it up because it's a better story than Genesis and way more entertaining.

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>>85534670
>>85534730
>turning Gilgamesh into a pretty boy anime fuck doll

disgusting

>>85534597
>half of the movie is Gilgamesh and Enkidu doing macho men stuff
>the other half is Gilgamesh crying and feeling down

Nah, it would be normie poison.

>>85534939
Him and Enkidu where described as beautiful so it makes sense why the Japanese would portray him that way.

But enough about Fate who would you guys cast?

>>85534780
Film worked better than Ufotable's wholly unnecessary adaptation. Might as well have just played the VN at least you get the h-scenes.

>>85535125
Not OP but you could pad it out with the Gilgames and his army fighting Akka

>>85535199
>40 hour story turned into a 1 hour and 30 minute movie apposed to a 26 episode show that actually added to the story

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>>85535141
>described as beautiful

they were masculine. Gilgamesh was causing trouble because he was fucking too many women including the wives of everyone in his Kingdom.

Gerard Butler could have done that role

But he's too old now

no
fuck off sandniggers

>>85535468
Educate yourself

this pamphlet was funnier than it had any right to be

>>85535517
kys smelly desertnigger

>>85535424
Well he is the King. I just want to see Gilgamesh verbally destroy Ishtar on the big screen

>>85535321
>40 hour story
Man it doesn't take 40 hours to read LOTR yet I have to waste 2 days on some fake video game with a story that can, more than adequately, be told in 90 minutes.

>>85535554
What do you mean haha

>>85535595
Fate/Stay Night takes about 70 to 80 hours to read fuck off DEENfag

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>>85535468
whiter than modern Europe

>>85535424
Wasn't it straight up Gilgamesh's kingly right to take the virginity of every new bride?

I would like to see the montage of Enkidu fucking Shamhat for 168 hours straight.

>>85535675
Yeah as King he was allowed to enact a law where he gets to fuck the wife before the husband on their wedding knight since she belongs to him because he is the King

>>85535424
That's Japan's version of manliness

It would all hinge on the casting of Enkidu
Hes the one that normalizes Gilgamesh, and without a really likeable Enkidu nobody will want Gilgamesh to succeed
I'd like to see a hollywood Ramayana more though

>>85535603
i literally laughed out loud at some of the stuff in it, i cant recall what it was though; this never happens with books for me other than the odyssey

>>85535794
>The city is his possession, he struts through it, arrogant, his head raised high, trampling its citizens like a wild bull. He is king, he does whatever he wants, takes the son from his father and crushes him, takes the girl from her mother and uses her, the warrior’s daughter, the young man’s bride, he uses her, no one dares to oppose him.

>The priest will bless the young couple, the guests will rejoice, the bridegroom will step aside, and the virgin will wait in the marriage bed for Gilgamesh, king of great-walled Uruk. It is he who mates first with the lawful wife. After he is done, the bridegroom follows. This is the order that the gods have decreed. From the moment the king’s birth-cord was cut, every girl’s hymen has belonged to him.”

Damn I wish a was a king during the early days of civilization.

>>85535963
Can you even make a likable Enkidu?
>born for the single purpose of undermining Gilgamesh's authority and act as his rival
>"oh shit, I'm gonna show this tyrant king what's what"
>"oh shit, this tyrant king is really hot, let's make out and become best friends"

can fatefags please get the fuck out with your desire to watch gilgamesh and enkidu fuck on screen. you're absolutely cancer.
don't you have threads on /jp/ to ruin?

>>85536113
Also, there is something wonderful about reading a historical text that is so vulgar. Makes me feel like a naughty schoolboy.

>>85535640
>70 to 80 hours to read

No it fucking doesn't. All routes done completely can be done in 40 hours. I know, I did it in 38.

>>85535321
>>85535595
>>85536417
Kek. For a while I thought you guys were talking about the poem and was wondering what the fuck kind of version I read that took like an hour.

>>85534597
>Are we doomed to an eternity of Iliad rehashes?
There's only been a couple and pretty much all of them are forgettable.

>>85536417
average is around 50 hours. anyone faster than that is obviously skipping shit or an absurdly fast reader. anyone longer than that has low IQ or is reading it in a language that isn't their first.

>I'll cry now, citizens of Uruk, and you
>will finally hear what no one else
>has ever had the nerve to say in sorrow.
>I was family and friend to Enkidu and I shall
>fill the woodlands where we stalked with loud, sad sobs today.
>I cry now, Enkidu, like some crazed woman. I howl.
>I screech for you because you were the ax upon my belt
>and the bow in my weak hand; the sword within my sheath,
>the shield that covered me in battle; my happiest robe,
>the finest clothes I ever wore,
>the ones that made me look best in the eyes of the world.

You expect millennials to watch this and not call it "gay shit"?

>>85536113
How come you don't like Enkidu? It's the original bromance

>>85536150
Personally I love that Fate is able to introduce young people to ancient stories

>>85536562
I didn't skip anything. I do read quickly, I didn't use the voices it was too slow.

>>85536700
>You will never be loved as Gilgamesh loved Enkidu

;_;

>>85536700
>Millennials believe that bromances are a new thing when this existed

What happened to guy relationships?

>>85536753
They only read them to use as evidence in their crack theories about which Servant is the strongest.

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>You will never live to see Odysseykino

>>85536861
At least they're reading them right? And hey they get more cultured in the process

>>85536753
I do too, but the genderswapping everyone gets pretty annoying.

Like why the the fuck is Nero a girl?

>>85536869
WE WUZ HELLENES N SHIT

>>85536912
Did Nasu write Fate/Extra? I know his friend told him to make Arthur a girl and he actually put a lot of effort into the explanation. All the other Authors just do it because lolsaber

>>85536712
I would more say I enjoy him rather than like him, at least in the traditional "normalizing" sense. His story is basically one of corruption after all.

>>85536854
Women became equals and now men has to focus all energy on them instead of bromances.

>>85536912
How else will they sell body pillows?

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>>85535424
>>85535867
Japanese(particularly women) don't typically find hairy and muscled out men as insanely beautiful/handsome so even if he would be masculine like that, they would still make him a bishonen to satisfy the "beautiful"description. His masculinity, I guess, would be shown more in his fighting ability and attitude.
It's also possible they only understand the word "beautiful" to mean a pretty boy as well considering famous guys like pic related were once popular..

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>>85538234
The Japs also see gayness and masculinity differently. While our stereotypical gay is a pretty boy twink their stereotypical gay is a masculine muscle men as gay.

>>85538472
Not masculine muscle men, just muscled men. Masculinity isn't just a look, it's a behavior/attitude. One can be skinny and still act masculine.
But yes, it goes back to the fact mostly men would find men who are super muscular like that attractive.these are generalities and stereotypes im talking of here, of course.