This airs tonight. Who is your money on? PHELPS VS SHARK

The shark probably isn't a raging pothead so I'm gonna have to go with him.

>a fish that has evolved billions of years to be perfectly adapted to the ocean
vs
>some pot head from Maryland

>>85342359
but how does it feel to know that a raging pothead is better and more successful than you in every way? gotta sting a little right?

>straight white male racing a shark instead of season African shark racers

>>85342447
you insult like a woman or redditor, anon

>>85342456
>phelps
>straight
Pick one.

>>85342625
k lemme change my insult. * But how does it feel to know that a raging pothead is more successfull than you in every way and youre still just a faggot?

I wish my parents loaded me up with hgh when i was a kid

>>85342456
>black man
>swim

Pick one

>>85342317
Anyone else here rooting for the shark?

>>85342317
Literally who VS. Shark?

>>85342456
>blacks can swim

kek

Bong here; what?

They'll have drugged the shark up thing is rigged more than the Mayweather/Connor fight

Can't we find the answer to this with a quick google search?

>phelps overdoses on weed and dies
>shark eat his corpse
>DUDE I'M A SHARK SUCK MY DICK LMAO
Haha would be funny haha

>>85342903
>most successful Olympian ever
>literally who

>>85342976
Haha

>>85342930
discovery channel is gonna feed that swimmer to a shark

Phelps can go an irrelevant mph in water, because Sharks simply go MUCH faster

though I am sure it's rigged for Phelps to win it.

What is this. Why are people doing this stupid televised-on-all-channels animal shit? Wasn't there a guy who tried to get swallowed alive by an anaconda a few years ago?

It feels like it's catering to the lowest common denominator that doesn't actually understand how animals work. Do these things get views, or is it Phelps desperately treading water HAHAHAAHAHAHAHAAHA as he fades from relevance in the public eye?

On the plus side, it might be the first time someone is consumed by a shark in HD live on tv

>>85342989
>Olympics
Oh that thing homosexuals and ballerinas go to?

>>85343071
I'm pretty sure he's not even going to be anywhere near the shark.

>>85342823
Better than being a degenerate junkie, right fellow redditor XD? Oh wait...

I doubt the shark could win in a weed smoking contest unless it's sea weed.

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>>85342317
Phelps has spent the past two months adapting his swimming to that of a shark.

So it's not going to just be that easy.

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>>85343184

Is someone gonna stream it?

>>85343154
You tried :(

>>85342823
I don't see what youre getting at
Stephen hawking can't even use his legs and you're trying to force a response with michael phelps?

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>using 100% maximum sustained effort to sprint from one side of a pool to the other in order to simulate the effortless floating through water that a shark does
Do Americans really do this?

>i'm so fast, i raced an animal that has no understanding of the concept of competitive racing

>>85343184
10/10

>>85343367
Literally every animal knows what a race is. Fish race all the time.

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>>85343569
>Literally every animal knows what a race is
Do Americans really do this?

>>85343115
What's the fucking point then?

>>85343569
Wrong, I asked a pig if he knows what niggers are and he had no clue. My dog knows about niggers though.

>>85342317
>PHELPS VS SHARK
Maybe he should be wearing a shark fin then and not a dolphin fin?

>not knowing the difference between a shark and dolphin
Do Americans really do this?

>>85342317
Should have gotten Phelps to play Aquaman

>>85343841
>not knowing sharks are afraid of dolphins
Are yurobongs really this stupid?

>>85343841
You can't put either on a burger, why would americans know about them?

What's he gonna do, swim around for five minutes near a cage?

Shark Week is dead.

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>>85343931
There are no dolphins in the pool.

>>85343953

>>85343931
>yurobongs
As opposed to non-Euro bongs?

how does the shark even know it's racing and supposed to go fast

What time does this air?

>>85342317
Is the shark also doping?

>>85342317
>white shark 25 mph
>pothead lanket 5 mph
yeah i wonder who would win

>>85343814
Was this funnier in your head?

>>85343814
i asked my dog about whites and he doesnt know about them, but i asked your wife about blacks and she started to flush.

>>85344456
>shark literally made to glide through water effortlessly
>stoner swimmer

STAY TUNED FOR XTREME DEADLY SHARK XTREME MAN SWIM-OFF

Do the sharks get friggin laser beams on their heads?

>>85342447
>>85342823
Useless bait posting. Quite embarrassing to be honest. Sounds like a 14 year old is behind the keyboard here.

I know you think 4chan is "super edgy" compared to your home boards on reddit, but you seem retarded here. Try again next time.

>>85344706
4chan thinks supporting the GOP is edgy now
literally just a bunch of grumpy old men with poor social skills masquerading as teenagers