I have decided to become an actor

why are actors such faggots
why does the word "actor" trigger in my mind some histrionic freak butchering shakespeare's beautiful words
nobody likes actors, esp. not filmmakers

You just know

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>>85257955
>tfw aubrey will never look at you like that

>>85257955
he has a pancake face. literally no jawline

>>85257955

Take acting classes, go to auditions, act in plays, really just do it as much as you possibly can

If you're lucky, attractive, and talented (along with working your ass off all the time), then you might get noticed eventually, but that could still take anywhere from 2 or 3 years to 20 or 30

>>85257955
you have to be connected or be a complete sociopath that can actually be a character

Be a Jew, be connected to Jews or suck dick really well and have a tight boypussy

>>85258099

she's super qt in portlandia

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5ch1kXp3mQA

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dMqoqK73T3g

>>85258142

Wouldn't being very empathetic be way more effective for being an actor than being a sociopath because you could actually relate to the character you're trying to play and act as if you were that person?

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>>85258119
To be honest I'd prefer to be one of those terrible actors who keeps getting hired and paid lots of money (Megan Fox, Adam Sandler, Jai Courtney kind of thing).

How to I achieve that?

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Aubrey has alot of talent

>How do I succeed at this?

Head shots, make of demo reel of you "acting" and hire an agent.

>Who do I need to impress?
In this order agents, directors, producers,

>When I am successful, will my female co-stars throw themselves at me (pic related)?

I'm going to guess since you are on /tv/ you are ugly as sin so no.

>>85258119 >>85258365
This mostly.
It's important to know that a successful actor is someone who can make a living full time while enjoying what they do. Most actors out there are not famous.

You don't have to be totally hot, there plenty of roles out there for weird looking people, few of them are leading roles but it's work.

Don't expect to get noticed. There are loads of talented people out there that will never make it big.

>>85258001
>butchering shakespeare's beautiful words
You sound like a fucking casual

>>85258099
Those toes are literally perfect

>>85258164
I miss early portlandia

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>>85258164
aubrey is cute

>>85258229

Megan Fox is hot, Adam Sandler just coasts on his earlier successes when he actually made some good stuff and now just makes movies that he knows people will see and laugh at because they're dumb humor because he has his own production company and can afford to make the movies and then profit off them, and Jai Courtney is like a discount Chris Pratt

>>85257955

>learn to speak bullshit as your main language
>learn to speak bullshit as your main language
>learn to speak bullshit as your main language

>strong social media presence
>strong social media presence
>strong social media presence

>read every contract in full
>read every contract in full
>read every contract in full

>get an agent
>get an agent
>get an agent

>audition for anything and everything
>audition for anything and everything
>audition for anything and everything

>be prepared for rejection
>be prepared for rejection
>be prepared for rejection

>notice trends and know yourself
>notice trends and know yourself
>notice trends and know yourself

>stand out by being different
>stand out by being different
>stand out by being different

>be selective in the roles you do take
>be selective in the roles you do take
>be selective in the roles you do take

>other than actors fee gross points pay only
>other than actors fee gross points pay only
>other than actors fee gross points pay only

>it's who you know and who you blow
>it's who you know and who you blow
>it's who you know and who you blow

Everyone sleeps with their costars in Hollywood like they go out for Starbucks. It's standard.

>>85258282
>>85258718

God damn, the INTP stare makes me weak in the knees.

>>85257955
Enjoy being a 37 year old Barista

>>85259114

So, I can be potentially prestigious even if I'm already a failure? Sounds like you just gave my life potential merit here. :P

>>85258164

Before she got Hollywooded.

I still like her.

Also learn to write material. See: Sylvester Stallone, Ben Affleck, Matt Damon, etc.

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>>85259078
*grabs your balls*

>>85257955
just pretend to be a jew. whenever they ask you just say you're ashkenazi jewish mainly on your mother's side. a jewish last name like silverman, weiss, schwartz or goldstein will help too, so always give that name

>>85259694
*tips fedora*
milady

>>85259694

Dear god.

>>85257955
Be mildly attractive with or without a beard and white, that's all. Also, above average in height.

>>85259951
>above average in height
>actor
>above average in height

>>85258365
Do all of this and then audition for any shitty cw series.

>>85257955
Be related to someone who has already made it in the industry.

>>85259078
>muh meme psych horoscopes

>>85259709
This. Everyone in the thread beforehand is being naive as fuck. Jews give work to other Jews.

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>>85257955
> I have decided to become an actor
me too

>>85257955
>How do I succeed at this?
Acting classes. Know the right people. It's about 80% luck though.
>Who do I need to impress?
People that can help you get important roles. And it isn't about impressing them, it's about befriending them. Have good decision making skills and don't be a dick to anyone.
>When I am successful, will my female co-stars throw themselves at me (pic related)?
If you're attractive, yes. If you look like Steve Buscemi or Ron Perlman, then no.

>>85260464
> Know the right people.
an actor is like a social prostitute
kinda sad

>>85260315

I liked those kind of eyes even before I knew how they were meme labeled. So, your point is irrelevant here.

>>85258057
Underrated.

>>85260532
Isn't that a requirement for all great jobs?