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Valerian

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Thread replies: 124
Thread images: 11

Anyone see Valerian yet? Thoughts?
>>
>>85225828
Never heard of it.
>>
>>85225828
5/10. A lot of nice green screens, but soulless characters.
>>
>>85225937
New space opera from the director of The Fifth Element.
>>
it has clive warren but also rihanna

no thanks
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cara delevignes face pisses me off
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>>85225828
seeing it tomorrow night, i need more cara panty shots in my life
>>
>>85226003
How was rihanna?
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>>85225937
I have literally only just heard of this too by seeing a chance video on Youtube.

It looks interesting but it's going to be a fucking financial disaster for 2 reasons.

1. Over emphasis on 3D screenings.
2. Shitty marketing.

Dredd 3Dâ„¢ syndrome.
>>
>>85225828
It's going to bomb.
>>
>>85227480
This. It's currently tracking as one of the biggest bombs of all time

https://www.usatoday.com/story/life/movies/2017/07/19/valerian-sci-fi-gambles/487442001/

Hopefully this ends the "Cara Delevigne is a star" meme once and for all.
>>
>>85229196
>Hopefully this ends the "Cara Delevigne is a star" meme once and for all.

She is rich as fuck, she will be in all the movies if she wants to.
>>
Just came out of it. 5/10, Cara needs to fuck off from movies, so does Rihanna. Also dont watch this in 3D if you have a choice.
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>>85229395

How long was Rihanna even in the movie?
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>>85229514
For like 10 minutes

She is actually a shapeshifter bubble alien thing and her real screentime is around 3 minutes also we wuz kingz
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>>85225828
I just saw it and thought it was alright, though I am aware I have pleb taste. My biggest disappointment was I thought this was going to be a movie about the city itself, exploring every nook and cranny, but instead it was a story going through the city without really exploring it. The plot itself was "meh" and I'm not picky with visuals so I won't comment on that.

Nice idea but wasted potential. Still wasn't bad.
>>
>>85225828
overrated due to its contributions
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>>85226700
>New
kek
>>
>>85229681

its source material isn't new, the movie based on it is. Schmuck.
>>
>>85225828
Liked it...
Until I realized all dialogue was sarcasm. And then they started to try and subtly bring politics into it with MUH LEGAL ILLEGAL IMMIGRANTS THINK OF THEM, and the whole "don't do what's right do what feels right". And the whole tranny shit that was going on with the aliens, and the female alien that was flirting with the blonde girl (okay maybe the last one is just nit picking since she is an alien and might not have mf genders, but it still bothered me a little). Please someone tell me the source material was like that too, I'd honestly hate the film less if it turns out they were being faithful instead of cramming shit where it doesn't belong.
>>
>>85229304
Why do (((they))) keep doing this?
>>
Saw it today, would have preferred the entire movie just be cute xenos on a sexy beach.
>>
>>85230961
The comic was heavily left wing futurist and feminist.
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>>85231777
Ah that makes sense. Still don't like how literally every time the two main characters would talk, it was sarcasm.
Like holy shit, not even irl sarcastic people are that sarcastic. It was like Marvel quips but much much worse, because at least Marvel doesn't put quips into every sentence and scene including ones that are supposed to carry a lot of emotions.
>>
>>85230961
Really? The trailer made me think chaotic evil ayys crash land and try and take over the city.
>>
>>85229196
how much is marvel paying you to shit on this? shouldn't you be turfing over on reddit, where they get more coverage? face it, 4chan is niche. your handlers are going to want to see those logs, you know.
>>
>>85229595
>My biggest disappointment was I thought this was going to be a movie about the city itself,

> Star Wars
> not actually about suns engaged in combat
> dropped
>>
>>85232745
>trusting a trailer
>>
>>85232745
I honestly didn't see any of the trailers.
I've already seen all the movies in the theaters at the moment minus the really bad ones, and didn't feel like re watching anything.
>>
>>85229196
>Hopefully this ends the "Cara Delevigne is a star" meme once and for all
nah her dad bought her a spot in modeling and now """acting""". you'd have better luck hoping he loses all his money overnight
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>>85225828
waiting for the 4K HDR torrent here

is it as good as it looks?
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Fucking Girls Trip is projected to make more money this weekend.

http://www.tracking-board.com/war-will-reign-supreme-once-more-at-box-office-as-dunkirk-leads-the-pack/
>>
>>85226700
What's a 'space opera'
>>
>>85225828
Writing/dialogue was hokey as fuck
A couple good-looking scenes (infinite market, pleasure alley etc)
Some of the human characters and aliens looked pretty cool
Effects looked kinda cheap at times
>>
>>85229196
I'd rather watch Cara in a movie than Gal Gadot, she's a better actress than Gadot is too
>>
>>85225828
orange and blue poster

it means it is generic as fuck
>>
>>85235811
Pretentious way of saying "science fiction".
>>
>>85225828
It's eyecandy. That's it. It just looks nice. But holy shit the acting in this fucking movie is TERRIBLE.
>>
The acting was shitty but holy fuck the visuals in this movie were pure unadulterated sex.

It was a genuinely fun adventure movie with a decent story and kind of weird pacing. But they really went full ham with the production design. It was basically The Fifth Element but on a much grander scale.
>>
>>85238384
good thing is, 90% global audiences won't give a shit, since they'll watch with foreign subtitles or dubbed by decent voice actors.

Confirmed for a cult classic in less than a decade
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>>85238384
>It's eyecandy. That's it. It just looks nice.
Well yeah it's a Besson film
>>
Just by looking at the poster this seems like a disappointment.

Especially when there is a fucking advertisement right on top of it.

>Brought to you by (person/group) who did (thing)
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>>85226928
imagine chris tucker in fifth element but not funny and twice as annoying.
>>
>>85226928
Aside from her stupid dance number, she was one of the highlights for someone that's maybe 5 mins max. Mostly not as Rihanna visually and her voice weirdly piped in all around you
>>
>>85235956
pubic brow > jewish smile
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>>85235706
>looking at 16.5 mil
jesus christ
>>
It's a wannabe Star Wars x Guardians of the Galaxy. Neat visuals but that hardly held my internest. 4/10.
>>
but is it better than Jupter Ascending?
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>>85225828
Does it have a lot aliens doing stuff, or are they just there for visual effect, while the heroes fight faceless enemies?
>>
>>85239572
The 5th Element was actually a fun watch, as long as you don't take it too seriously it's rather entertaining.

But the problem with Valerian is that the actors seem as charismatic as a trisomic goldfish (haven't seen the movie yet), while in the 5th element the casting was legit good.
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I hope its good!
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>>85240151
...yes.
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>>85240522
The acting wasn't that bad really, it was the lines they were given that were weak.

The movie definitely delivered in the effects department though. Goddamn.
>>
>>85240139
That's ironic considering both took their inspirations from Valerian. Or, sad. Not sure which these days.
>>
>>85240151
In the same sense that norovirus is better than cancer, yes.
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im going to see it just for cara :3
i would do anything just to watch my wife :333
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>>85240792
:3
>>
I went and saw the film tonight.

Here's the main problem with the movie, it's a high budget fan film.

Luc Besson is a fan of the original french comic, Valerian and Laureline, the 2017 film is based on.
He seems to have used it as a source of inspiration when making The Fifth Element.

This is important when looking at how the movie's narrative is structured. It feels like it was taken 100% from the comics, from the dialogue to the pacing.
The original comic was a weekly installment, so obviously it was slow paced so that it could keep readers entertained over a long period of time.
When trying to turn a story like that into a movie, you need to trim it so that it has a faster pace.
You can spend less time with exposition, and less asides from the main plot (i.e. the laureline kidnapping and Rihanna ayy lmao).

I feel as if Luc Besson respected the original comic too much, and refused to undertake the necessary steps to make the story faster paced and more "movie-like".

TL;DR: The movie is a straight retelling of the comic, and that doesn't work.
>>
>>85241822
Note that I haven't read the original comic, so I don't know how much was really taken for this movie, but this is the impression I got based on what I know about the director, and what I saw.
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>>85241861
worth seeing in theatres?
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>>85242278
For the sounds and visuals and Cara, definitely

Watching this movie high was a good choice
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>>85242371
Does cara wear any sexy outfits?
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>>85242278
The visuals and sound are a spectacle made for the big screen, and they're great, but it's a 2 hour 15 minutes movie that felt like 3.

go see it, but prepare for a bad script.

>>85242395
bikinis for the first half of the movie, space suits and uniform for the second half.

As an aside, the opening scene is fantastic, for the 3 minutes it lasted. It was like a Space Oddity music video.
>>
>>85237037
Not true, space opera is distinct from science fiction in that it doesn't pay any attention to futurism or technical aspects at all, it all might as well be magic and is just a backdrop for the story. The cliche example is Star Wars vs Star Trek. Literally just type it into a search box, dude
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>>85225828

Thought it as awesome. Loved it
>>
>>85232968
not him but fuck that valerian shit, glad its tracking to be one of the biggest bombs ever. It looks like garbage, Like John Carter tier trash
>>
>>85227120

Nah its $150 million budget is already 90% covered from foreign pre-sales and such. Do ur research
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>>85225828

THIS STYLE.OF POSTER SUCKS MAJOR DICK

I AVOID ALL FILMS WITH THIS POSTER STYLE LIKE THE BLACK FUCKING PLAGUE

ALSO THE ONES WHERE THE WORDS ARE PRINTED RIGHT ON THE GUYS FACE
LIKE THAT SOCIAL.NETWORK POSTER

FUCK, GET UR SHIT TOGETHER HOLLYWOOD

AND THEY WINDER WHY THEY LOSE SO MUCH MONEY WHEN YHEY CRANK OUT THIS.LAZY UNINSPIRED SHIT

sorry.had.to.vent.
>>
>>85230995
if you had as much money as her, what would you do with it? buy ten million tacos for that Dr Who marathon?
>>
>>85243720
Invest it, turn it into more money, then build cool shit with it. Huge infrastructure type stuff, buildings, new technology. As well as financing artists I like (movies etc.)
>>
How do you go from Bruce Willis to Dane Dehaan?
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>>85243961
And that's why you'll never be rich.
>>
>>85244022
Maybe it's a metacommentary on the sorry state of Western men (and thus western culture) in modern times
>>
Wait, it's already out? Here it premiers on August 10, what the fuck
>>
>>85244068
Get back to me in 10 years, I think my odds are good. My only vices are fashion and video games and you can satisfy both on the cheap
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>>85242278
No
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>>85232968
>If you don't like this movie that's unrelated to capeshit you must be a Marvel shill

Whoa. Please tell me more
>>
>>85225828
Never heard of it and I refuse to watch anything with that ugly dyke in it.
>>
>>85225828

If you liked that heaping shitpile The Fifth Element, you might like this. At least this one has a story. A stupid story that drags on for an hour too long, but whatever.
>>
>>85242824
>$150 million budget
>Do ur research
lol
>>
>>85242824
What does that even mean? Presumably at some point it has to end on being sold to consumers. If consumers don't give a shit, whoever paid for it is gonna get fucked.
>>
>>85244230
Nice shit taste.
>>
>>85232968
>how much is marvel paying you to shit on this?

Give it a fucking rest, cunt. Nobody cars or knows about this movie but us. I have to assume you're larping at this point.
>>
>>85235706

>20 mil for Homecoming.

Ouch
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>>85244137
>living in a third world shithole

shiggy diggy
>>
>>85226928
That entire middle segment with her character and Ethan Hawke, and some MiB looking retard aliens would've been cut by a non-hack director. It's a really long detour from anything else that's happening. The movie feels six hours long. Also, Rihanna was KANGS n sheeit. So fucking cringeworthy. But so is the entire movie.
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>>85235811

Remember the blue lady in fifth element... Space opera.

Come on now.
>>
>>85240151
Anything is better than Jupiter Ascending.
>>
>>85225828
9/10 it was crack cocaine for my senses i needed some hardcore sci fi like this, fucking masterpiece

its going to get a lot of hate though because millenials expect marvel logos and riveting reviews and dont have the imagination to be taken to these places, but growing up i read books with landscapes and visuals like this and hope to see more, because im sick of brown and grey montone shit and this was fucking refreshing
>>
>>85242371
DUDE WEED LMAO
>>
>>85244418
>Also, Rihanna was KANGS n sheeit.

This has no meaning anymore on this board, how about you actually explain what the fuck you're talking about.
>>
>>85244230
>If you liked that heaping shitpile The Fifth Element
I did like it. Fifth Element was awesome. Fuck you. Fight me faggot.
>>
>>85241822
why dont you make the film then you fucking piece of shit, it was amazing
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>>85242806
John Carter was great
>>
>>85246668
Okay.
1/10 b8
kys shill
>>
>>85246688
shes a schwa you spastik is that so hard to understand
>>
>>85246788
liking something makes you a shill? fuck off go watch your little men in tights fighting in an airport, let the big boys here do special effects properly where things are planned out and designed
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>>85246817
>visual diarrhea = properly planned out and designed sfx

Okay
2/10 b8
Still kys shill.
>>
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Kek. It literally has six million ayys genocided so that's why you have to do exactly what the peaceful refugee ayys want you to do. Also punch the evil space nazis everybody punch them.
>>
>>85246788
>>85246843
>kys in 2017

fuck off back to rebbit.
>>
>>85247099
If that's your dying wish, so be it.
kys and I'll go to reddit
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>>85247173
you know you have to be 18 to post ehre right?
>>
>>85247267
Here m8, it's here.
>>
>>85229586
STOP..... She save the galaxy? I will not see fuck propaganda. God i wanted to see this but if the nig is the key to all of it?......
>>
>>85248598
No nothnig like that she is a minor character in the grand scheme of things.
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>>85240151
I once snorted a large chunk of turkey because someone made me laugh exactly as I was swallowing it. Had gravy trickling down from my sinuses into my mouth for an hour.
It wasn't until I went to sleep, 8 perhaps 9 hours later and woke up around midnight, had it dislodged itself. It shocked me awake, and I had this horrible snotty tasting chunk suddenly in my mouth which still needed to be chewed.
I would rather experience that horrible 14 ordeal, and cap it off chewing, once again, that gooey, meally, bland, morsel of absolute disgust than watch Jupiter Ascending a second time.
>>
>>85248598

how did you get that she saved the galaxy from that spoiler? Are you a moron?
>>
>>85243582
You hate Drew Struzan?
>>
>>85239903
>how was rihanna
>imagine chris tucker in fifth element but not funny and twice as annoying.
Sounds like about what I'd expect. That lady's got a gift (for being annoying af)
>>
Jewish Neo-Liberal propaganda.
>>
>>85225828
it's great, but not as good as it could be

there's a lot to take in and i think a lot of people just kind of watch it without realizing how well developed everything is. some of the characters are a little silly but i think that's an attempt to make them easy to understand. i think more subtlety would have helped this movie tremendously but everything else is on point.
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>>85246688
It's meaning is very clear. I haven't seen the movie but I am picturing Rihanna in an Egyptian or Mediterranean aesthetic in an attempt to claim these white empires were actually created by sub-sarharan Africans.
>>
>>85246668
i agree, idk why people (especially here) aren't digging this movie.
>>
>>85226887

AMERICANED
>>
>>85233007
I think you know what I mean. I wanted to see the cast interact with the world they were traveling through. They made a setting that I wanted to stick my head in and autisticly search as much as possible. See how such a city could possibly function despite massive differences in culture, language barriers, differences in physiology. Also the city was essentially a hive city from 40k in space. I wanted to see its inner working and how the hell do they keep such a cobbled together mess operational.

Instead it feels like the movie wanted to interact with the city as little as possible and just wanted to tell it's mediocre story. The city is such an interesting location but the movie didn't want to touch it anymore than it had too.
>>
>>85246668
>hardcore sci fi
this isn't the martian, this is fantasy scifi at best
>>
>>85226887
Cara is the third hottest girl in that photo dude
>>
>>85225828
If it is as true to the source I hear, then I'm excited.
>>
This movie was the Double Dragon of my adult life. The plot was terrible, the acting was dismal, the writing was done for international audiences (no colloquialisms throughout the entire film, no reality), the City of a Thousand Planets feels like an inconsequential backdrop, the music was not soaring or inspiring as it was presented to be in the trailers, the sound effects were flat, the voices were flat, the music was flat, the casting was tone deaf, the emotional beats were empty, there were a handful of quirky and enjoyable characters that drowned in poor direction and stagnant action, and the only time I'd truly enjoyed the film experience was when I laughed so hard at the thought of not going to the bathroom because I was afraid I'd miss one good scene if there ever would be one.
There wasn't, at least not beyond the opening credits (well shot) and perhaps a few minutes from the opening scene (though made completely ludicrous later on in the film).
2/10 for sporadically beautiful visuals and interesting aliens, and literally nothing else. Worse than Suicide Squad.
>>
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>>85229395
You take that back I love Ri Ri
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>>85249909
Anon haha. Where did you find this one?
>>
>>85226887
S T I C C
T
I
C
C
>>
>>85246688
if you don't know what that means then you need to go back
>>
>>85249795
Read the comic then.

http://readcomicbooksonline.net/valerian-and-laureline
Thread posts: 124
Thread images: 11


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