how would you have fixed Spider-Man Homecoming?

so basically remake the previous spiderman stories

sounds fun cant wait to watch the same story for the 3rd time now

>>84789549
Have Uncle Ben do the "Great Power " line as the voice.

>>84789549
Vulture was great as is, the rest of your points are you just wanting it to be like the other movies

>>84789549
Peter is now SpiderGwen and she fucks the black girl at least five times during the flick...also Ned is called Ganke in this version and he stays as perfect as he is.

NO ZENDAYA

Seriously this is all they needed to do. Homecoming is like an expertly crafted Gordan Ramsay hamburger that some dip shit smeared vegan mayo (zendaya) all over in an attempt to get people who would never try a burger in the first place to like it.

>>84789549
It's simple: Make it a stand alone film. Don't force MCU bullshit. Cast a Peter Parker that isn't an obnoxious twink. I don't give a shit about the forced diversity bullshit as long as the story is good. And the story wasn't good, unfortunately.

Spider-Man has always worked best in its own universe. Out of all Marvel heroes, I'm pretty sure his universe is the most developed in the comics (that's my impression, don't hurt me). There are so many Spider-Man villains and characters to choose from, they didn't need to make this film a feature length advertisement for the MCU minting machine.

>Actually develop Vulture as a villain and give Keaton more screen time
I agree with this. Keaton as Vulture was probably the only redeemable thing about Homecoming.

>>84789549
>Spiderman now uses homemade nooses instead of webs
>instead of a red outfit, he now sports a white robe with a pointed hood of the same color

>Ganke characer...but is not Ganke, is named Ned Leeds even though he doesn't look like Ned or acts like Ned
>Randy character...but is not Randy, is named Flash even though he doesn't look like Flash or acts like Flash
>Gloria character...but is not Gloria, is named Liz even though she doesn't look like Liz or acts like Liz
This was pretty racist then
>Literally who...but is not literally who, is named MJ even though she looks like a monkey and acts like cancer
This was shit

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>>84789549
>>Replace Betty Brandt with Gwen Stacy (the actress already looks and dresses like her in the movie)
She is actually like 6-7 younger than the rest of the cast, and repeating the same idea of previous movies is not a good idea
>>Replace Liz Allen and/or Michelle with a real Mary Jane Watson
So you want to have 2 love interest in the same movie?
>>Replace Ned and his annoying antics with Harry Osborn
Yeah probably true.only annoying part of the movie
>>Cut out almost all of the Iron Man/Happy Hogan stuff
Never gonna happen, Marvel needed to "tie in" the MCU
>>Spend some more money to make the CGI suit look less shit or simply use a practical suit more often
The problem with the suit is not the CGI, it's they used shitty colors and didn't give a proper texture, shit looks a bit off even in real life so using a practical one won't fiix the problem, they really need to remake the whole suit.

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>>84789549
Just make a live action version of Spectacular Spider-man

>>84789549
>replace the love interests, rest of the minorities are fine, but they're too iconic and crucial for any spiderman film. flash is a funny modern day shit head
>remove the 5th grade curriculum they used to spread marxism with and tell the cast to actually act like high schoolers
>remove the unnecessary vulgarity
other than that, it was a pretty good movie. if they were going to ignore so many potholes they probably should've just made peter look autistic since he was confronted with all of them

>Cut out the "My friends call me MJ" line

That's literally it.

">Ganke characer...but is not Ganke, is named Ned Leeds even though he doesn't look like Ned or acts like Ned
>Randy character...but is not Randy, is named Flash even though he doesn't look like Flash or acts like Flash
>Gloria character...but is not Gloria, is named Liz even though she doesn't look like Liz or acts like Liz"

How about we limit our criticisms to filmmaking and not how closely the movie adhered to disposable brochures made for children in the early 70's......

>>84790080
Spidey worked pretty well with his F4 crossovers in the comics IMO.

>>84790252
>Liz was best girl there and she was hispanic.
i guess Marvel does hates spics...

>>84790295
>Ganke
>Randy
>Easly 70s
One is from the 90s the other is from the 2010s. You almost got it pal

sex scenes

>>84790252

I remember watching this on a whim and being floored by how much development, wit, and heart the writers could cram into such small episodes. Seriously. Just grab every single person on that writing team and let them write every following Spider-Man movie. Let them direct, too, since they purposefully chose a less demanding aesthetic in order to create more spectacular battles. Everyone who was behind this deserves recognition.

>>84789549
>>Actually develop Vulture as a villain and give Keaton more screen time
Retard. Not all villains need complex motives and ulterior motives. He was well developed enough: he was a guy trying to provide for his family and workers, albeit with less than ethical motives.

>>84790295
Are you seriously trying to judge a film that is based on comic books, made for comic book fans (supposedly), that features comic book characters, and yet sarcastically refer to the source material as "disposable brochures made for children" as a means to refute any and all criticism of said film? What next? We judge hamburgers on the opinions of vegans?

This isn't autism. This is advanced autism.

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>>84790498
>>Not all villains need complex motives and ulterior motives.
>I don't know anything about storytelling.

Vulture was the only good thing in homecoming. Literally did nothing wrong.

>>84790148
Flash acted more like Phillip Urich than Randy if you ask me

>>84789549
Swap Tom Holland and Donald Glover's roles

>>84790284
Especially since she's not supposed to have any friends.

Character was pretty funny

>>84789549

Make a scene where Vulture goes home after the government kicks him off the New York salvage job. Have his wife ask him about bills or something. Make the audience really feel the pressure he's under

Actually talk about Uncle Ben. When Tony ultimately proves to be a poor mentor, have Aunt May talk about Ben, and maybe draw some parallel between him and Vulture. Make the loss of the suit a reminder of why Peter became Spider-Man, which was not to join the fucking Avengers

>make Peter an adult
>all white cast
>cut out Iron Mans, This is a spuierman movie.
>Make Flash Chad again
>Have the Vulture be a real villain and kill people, maybe he could be friends with Ultron
>Hard R rating
>Near the end maybe you find out Vulture is Mysterios
>Set the movie in 1963 like the classic comic.

Too much MCU shit. Too much Iron man and that fat fuck
Speaking of fat fucks, Ned is obnoxious.
Main actor isn't very good. Prefer Garfield and even Toby.
Like >>84790080 said. Spiderman works well in its own universe. Either that, or build the universe around Spiderman.
This whole movie felt like they had a very specific piece they needed for the puzzle and cut this movie specifically to fit it.

>>84790365
Hispanic isn't a race. What makes one Hispanic is to come from a Spanish speaking country. There are tons of black and mulatto Hispanics.

>>84790584
Not every villain needs to be Griffith

Like 99% of the people seeing spiderman I have never bought a comic....

However if i were to buy a star wars comic I would judge it based on its story and art not how closely aspects of it resembled a previous version in a different media....That is the textbook definition of autism.

>>84789549
>Remove Zedaya entirely or make her not a complete cunt
>Holy shit where's Uncle Ben? Make Stark less of a failing mentor and get Flashback Ben on this. Stark should be a helping hand, not Peter's guiding light.
>Let Tomei be sexy and take her out of the old lady clothes.
>Get whoever wrote the second half of the movie to write the first half.
>I actually like the idea of Angourie Rice as Gwen, put her in, fuck it.
>Develop Vulture just a bit more so he can go from good to great
>Make Peter's costume less Iron Man-y
>Make May's discovering his identity the emotional moment it needs to be and not waste it on a joke
>Give the movie an ending
>Either go all the way with you John Hughes thing or just drop it, fuck that half measures "hey look Ferris Bueller" bullshit, you ain't no fucking 80's witty charming high-school flick, you're a bland cape flick, fuck off.

>>84789549
Angourie Rice as Spider-Gwen.

>>84791065
>Uncle Ben
Honestly I'm happy we didn't have to see or get a flashback to him getting shot the way we do with the Waynes in every fucking reboot of batman.

>>84789549
>Harry Osborn

You're starting to turn me off here. Marvel shouldn't bring up a stale character such as Osbourne. I'm OK with the casting how it is.

>>84789549

MJ was one of my favorite parts though. I love how autistic they made her character. Truly a product of the 2010's.

>>84792513
This, that whole "washington monument built by slaves line" was clearly meant to portray her as a buzzkill, and not in a positive light.

>>84790838
get out, cancer

>>84791065
The scene where May found out was great, anon. The emotional reveal is what every story does. Let things be different. It even fit the tone of the film

>>84789549
Bring Raimi back

I thought it was good desu
Peter's obnoxious but that's how he's supposed to be
Tony stark was ham fisted to shit
No lasting battle damage to Peter, he gets fucked up but one jump cut away he's fine
Vulture just needed one scene of him struggling with bills to really make him great
Other than that I thought it was a great spider man movie.

>>84789549
>he watches capeshit

i would fix it by not giving them my money so eventually they'll stop ruining film

>>84793903
>fit the tone of the film
What? You think so? I thought it was completely out-of-left field.

>>84793955
>Peter's obnoxious but that's how he's supposed to be
Really? You came to this conclusion... how? He's supposed to be likable but awkward. Iron-willed, but naïve.
I really didn't get that from this actor like I did with Andrew Garfield.

>>84793903
>Let things be different
I'm willing if what we get is better than what "every story does".
Or do you really prefer a shitty one-second joke that the movie didn't need, as opposed to an emotionally strong scene that would enrich the movie and characters?
Just because it's different, doesn't mean it's good.

>>84794022
The movie was spastic and quirky from start to finish.

Didn't Harry and Pete not attend the same school till College since Harry was so rich?

>>84794143
Spastic, I agree with. That's not really a complement, mind you.

>>84794124
Jesus you're talking as if May finding out about Peter is the emotional backbone of the MCU. I'd rather her find out now and not have to go through trite conflict over keeping his alias a secret, the same cycle that we've been through over and over again

There's a plot hole in Spider-Man that's so big you could drive a truck through it.

The incident at the Washington Monument would have been investigated and treated as a TERRORIST ATTACK. The feds would have quickly figured out the source of the explosion that damaged one of America's most well known monuments. All those involved would have been found and arrested. END OF MOVIE

>in before "but tony told the Feds not to investigate a terrorist bombing at a national monument!"

Tony clearly didn't even know Peter was responsible

>>84794201
It's a compliment if the movie stays consistent with itself.

>>84789947
>Ned is called Ganke
>Wanting Bendis to get even more of a grip in Marvel
>Not knowing that Bendis is the cancer that is killing Marvel Comics
Typical /tv/.

>>84794224
>Jesus you're talking as if May finding out about Peter is the emotional backbone of the MCU
Stop blowing things out of proportion, my man. I've literally just said it's an emotional and important scene for the characters, and that doing it right would make the films better.

>I'd rather her find out now and not have to go through trite conflict over keeping his alias a secret, the same cycle that we've been through over and over again
That's because you're a legit pleb that wants an easier story. But this is not even my point here because I'm also all for her discovering it early into the series, since it'd lead to some interesting character drama, I just want it to be done right.

>>84789872
YOU CAN'T HAVE ANY ORIGINS OMG

>>84794414
"If it's not done my way then it's wrong."

Please, explain how your scene even works in a film like Homecoming, a lighthearted action comedy. How is it set up, executed, and followed through and still fits in the same tone as the rest of the film? What they did was original and fitting for the film. If you don't like it that's fine. No one is saying you have to like it. But just because it's not how you want it to be doesn't make it "wrong."

>>84795046
>honestly interpreting that as "I want it my way or it's wrong"
Nigga stop being so defensive, everyone loves this movie.
I cannot understand how you're not getting this. In this instance, a scene with actual emotion and character work is much better than a one-off joke.

Stop with the bullshit "lighthearted action comedy", an action film needs stakes and characters to work, it needs serious moments just as much as muh lighheart. Infact, the best of this film occurs in the later half, when things really do get serious and shit matters.
Or do you really believe a well done 5-minute dramatic scene of May discovering Peter's identity would completely wreck the tone of the film? Come the fuck on.

>>84789549
Wow. Who is this blonde bombshell? I'll see this watered down cookie cutter trash just for her

I don't have issues with diversity, but this movie tried too hard. Every other scene screamed "Look! MINORITIES!" They should have toned that down, and just keep it natural.

Peter was obnoxious as fuck and hardly even likeable. He could be troublesome when he began as Spidey, but even back then he had his reasons when he messed with the F4 (he needed money to support May and himself, since Uncle Ben died).

The supporting cast was terrible. Ned was the typical case of a "minority best friend comic relief" character. It was annoying in Ant Man, it was even more so here, especially because Peter should have gone lengths to prevent him from getting involved, since it was really dangerous.

Iron Man took far too much agency from Spiderman. Sure, he's 14, but Peter has always been his own person. He makes his mistakes and figures things out on his own. Sure, he's had mentor figures like Reed and Tony, but that's that, his agency was always his.
In this movie Peter just kept screwing up, hardly ever taking some time to reconsider his own actions, all because he wanted to become an Avenger.

I didn't like him getting a cybernetic suit either. Sure, in some stories he's had special suits, but since this is his beginning as a hero, he should just have a regular costume.

Flash looked all sorts of retarded. He was more of an annoying nerd, than a bully and he wasn't even a jock. Those two things have always been aspects that defined his character (when he was young).

Not having Peter recall Uncle Ben once, and the deal about the responsibility that comes with power, even if it's been done several times now, is a shame, since that's always been an important factor for Spiderman.

Gwen and Mary Jane should have been there, considering how crucial both of them are in Peter's life.

Vulture was the best thing in this movie. He deserved a lot more screentime.

>>84790252
Well, they did merge the Shocker with Montana, just like in Spectacular.

>>84790969

Let’s put Darth Maul in the comics, call him Vader, and change his skin to fluro green. That’s what this movie did.

>>84794251
I thought that too.

>>84794182

I don’t think the Osbournes are in this movie desu.

>>84789549
>how would you have fixed Spider-Man Homecoming?

moar ongurry rhys

Recast Peter Parker, Ice Cube's son from Straight Outta Compton could play him well.

>complain about struggling as a middle class worker

>Live in a high luxury house

That's the only thing I didn't like about the Vulture

>>84790861
>hispanic
>not a race
Getaloadofthisdumbasscam

Only Keaton could get typecast as Birdman

>>84790844
>Prefer Garfield
opinion disregarded

Make Vulture's backstory more believable. It's a proper motivation sure but they didn't really think it through. They can't just butt him out of a contract without consequence. He'd have been paid anyway because that's how contracts work. If not that, he'd have first done what any other reasonable man would do: no, not become a criminal, but sue them.

Not only that, the alien stuff didn't even seem all that essential to him building his gadgets. He and his friend needed to be fucking tech wizards to be able to work with the stuff and make all the stuff that they did. Why were they clean-up/construction workers if they were that good?

Also, eight whole years passed. That's a lot of fucking time. Why are they still only robbing ATMs and selling weapons (high-tech weapons, mind you) to random thugs on the street?

His monologue to Peter at the warehouse was terrible too. He didn't really justify his crimes, he just told Peter that rich people don't give a fuck which is something you learn in high school or college.

>>84800622
there was a significant enough time jump to justify his new business allowing him to afford a very nice house

>>84800622

That's the point. These contradictions make him a villain and not an antihero. He has to do a lot of doublethink to justify himself and his actions.

>>84794107
you could tell garfield was always pretending to be awkward it was the most unbelievable part of his role, he just did the same move
>look down
>mumble a few lines
>look up handsomely
>i'm such a nerd

seriously don't get any love over the mess of a movie/s that amazing sm 1 and 2 where. even as just movies they where terrible. as a spider-man movie, they where complete shit.

spider-man stole the webbing (didn't really invent shit) he wasn't really as smart as gwen and he constantly hurt everyone around him for selfish reasons. he wasn't even funny as much as just an asshole when in suit.

this spider-man was awkward and nerdy, he did actively put himself second and suffered consequences when he didn't. he was more confident in the suit and even did a ny accent, but it showed he was actually an inexperienced idiot. he was actually smart and made his own webbing, shooters, eye goggles.

this movie was actually good, as a movie. and it's not the BEST ever spider-man movie, but it's pretty damn closest to actually make him like the comics.

idk if it's just because people who like garfield like it out of nostalia. for it being their first spider-man movie they saw when they where kids. which seems to be the age group i see publicly like garfield over hollands. but my first spider-man was the rami movies and even though they hold a nostalgic place, this was better.

>>84789549
sorry, but Am I the only one that sees that "spidey" was a lot like deadpool , I mean just the character looks like a perfect set up for an upcoming movie like the comic were they are the 2 together; I see it in maybe 4 years from now. i don't know i get the vibe that the whole thing is just preparing for that duo, maybe im wrong. Plus, Michelle is actually Mary jane? I dont think so, Im just guessing but she remind me to Black widow in the first iron man (almost like an agent or someone that will be a superhero and not only a love interest). I dont know.

>>84790838
Sounds like shit.

>>84791065
>Remove Zedaya entirely or make her not a complete cunt
She's only a cint because your from /pol/

>Holy shit where's Uncle Ben? Make Stark less of a failing mentor and get Flashback Ben on this. Stark should be a helping hand, not Peter's guiding light.
Everyone know who uncle Ben is. Why waste time on him?

>Let Tomei be sexy and take her out of the old lady clothes.
No.

>Get whoever wrote the second half of the movie to write the first half.
First half was good.

>I actually like the idea of Angourie Rice as Gwen, put her in, fuck it.
We already seen Gwen.

>Develop Vulture just a bit more so he can go from good to great
He's pretty relatable villian.

>Make Peter's costume less Iron Man-y
Ignoring it because this is just a opinion.

>Make May's discovering his identity the emotional moment it needs to be and not waste it on a joke
Pretty emotional

>Give the movie an ending
What?

>Either go all the way with you John Hughes thing or just drop it, fuck that half measures "hey look Ferris Bueller" bullshit, you ain't no fucking 80's witty charming high-school flick, you're a bland cape flick, fuck off.
???

>>84789549
You whiny cucks

keep everything the same
>Ugh fucking Kikewood running out of ideas. Another reboot? Another dead uncle and Harry Osborn? Seriously? Get some original ideas

change some shit
>Ugh fucking Kikewood ruining muh lore, why isn't everything exactly as it was

There's no winning with you faggots.

>>84804003

>why waste time on him

The whole movie Spider-Man is going out there, doing stuff because he wants to be an Avenger. That's his motivation. Except at the end, when he's offered the chance, he rejects it. Why? What is his motivation? We already got a hint of it in Civil War, but they don't go into it. And they didn't have time to, but they should have here in Spider-Man's movie.

>>84790273
they're in highschool. there's a lot of unecessary vulgarity. flash doing the whole penis parker thing is classic freshman antics. better was playing fuck marry kill with the avengers. it was pretty realistic

>>84790080
your impressions are pretty fucking terrible because until the symbiote suit spiderman didn't have a single villain who wasn't just a mob boss or a glorified bank robber

>>84790100
I second this

>>84795675
ongurry rhys

>>84804982
The little guy.

>>84789549
Stop whining on /tv/ would be a start

>>84790080
The problem is Sony still has the rest of spidey's universe, considering they're doing a Venom movie.

Remove the non-whites. Done.

>>84808060
cry more :^)

>>84808269
Who's crying, nignog?

>>84808341
>Ah-Ah'm not mad, shaddup!!!
Ah yes, the anthem of the eternally butthurt baby

>>84808403
>u-umad
Hello /b/ circa 2012

>>84808440
Hello manbaby filled with impotent, passive aggressive rage

>>84808480
>Movie trailer come out on internet. Some people like. Some people love. Some people whatever. But baby-men, they no like. Baby-men no like at all. Baby-men hate, because movie make baby-men mad. Baby-men click thumb-down button on video site, because thumb-down button means mad. Did baby-men mention they mad? They mad. Baby-men liked old movie that baby-men saw when baby-men were babies, before internet was place where baby-men could put angry baby-thoughts. New movie no have men, have women. Women confuse baby-men. Women not men. Women not men at all! Baby-men bang head against keyboard until form mad baby-words. Baby-men put mad baby-words on internet. Baby-men shriek into void.

This is you.

>>84808532
Damn, I hit a nerve harder than I thought I would, didn't I? Don't worry, some day your balls will drop and maybe you'll actually have the balls to be a based racist/race-realist/someones edgy friend

>>84808651
I don't even know what the fuck you're trying to say anymore. Someday you'll have the balls to be someone's friend? Someday you'll have the balls to be a based racist?

I genuinely cannot follow your incoherent babbling. Is this that niggerbabble I hear so much about from the yanks?

>>84808698
>I-I didn't hear you, sa-say that again lol
Maybe you're just stupid?

>>84808788
>making up quotes to reply to
Oh dear. I've broken the nigger.

Have the film start with a young Peter with Uncle Ben during the attack on New York.
Uncle Ben dies trying to save some people and his dying words to Peter are " If you have the power to help it is then your responsibility."
The spot where Ben dies is where The Vulture and crew are cleaning up.
No retarded retread of Civil War.
Have Aunt May be an actual character.
No MJ character.
Have less Stark. Maybe have only his first and last scene.
Have original characters instead of race bent characters with different personalities.

That's just off the top of my head.

What if every spidey movie is an origin? Better, or worse?

When do you think we'll get to the point where black people demand segregation again and there are just two versions of movies to watch? Like, everything is the wizard of Oz vs the wiz.

>inb4 every black movie is poorly written, poorly acted in, full of plagiarism, poorly directed and barely produced

>>84807698

After talking to Vulture about it for 5 minutes? It's weak

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I propose this plot.

Peter Parker falls in love with Gwen Stacy.

Unable to confess, the wall crawler is gifted by a deus ex machina with the girl's phone number. Never minding the strange area code, he immediately calls her, and is overjoyed to find out that she has a crush on him as well.

But, the next day, when the spider-based superhero recounts the previous day's confessions to the girl, she only looks at him with a perplexed expression. After some investigation, he finds out that the girl he called is not the same girl he fell in love with. In fact, she doesn't exist in this universe at all. She is the girl's alternate universe counterpart, who has fallen in love with the MC's own AU self, who too is blissfully unaware of her crush.

Hijinks ensue as the two strike up a deal to give each other their darkest, most private secrets in order to equip the other with the weapons they need to conquer the heart of their other selves. While the two chase their respective loved ones, DRAMA ensues as they begin to fall in love with each other instead and question the NATURE of the MARVEL MULTIVERSE.

>>84810106
>>>/a/

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>>84810106

>>84810106


Stop posting that because it's already a thing.

https://www.fictionpress.com/s/3206139

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>>84810106
>2011
>keit-ai finds a way for the first time

>>84809164

I unironically agree.

>no nignog MJ
>no pooinloo Flash

Fixed

>>84809164
Kill yourself

>>84789549
>blondewashing Betty Brant

>>84804003
>She's only a cint because your from /pol/
Nah she's pretty cinty besides the slavery thing brah

>Everyone know who uncle Ben is. Why waste time on him?
Becasue he important.

>No.
Yes.

>First half was good.
Second half was better.

>We already seen Gwen.
oh

>Ignoring it because this is just a opinion.
Okay

>Pretty emotional
Not really.

>What?
It doesn't end dude, it just kinda stops.

>???
He's just triggered because they said this was a John Hughes movie and it prolly didn't fit his autistic checklist of what a "John Hughes" movie is.

>>84789549
Add "Whites Only" to subtitle, set it in 1940s or 2030, for accuracy