ITT: movies that piss you off thinking about them because of

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reviews like these just piss me the fuck off. Whenever i see a huge amount of descriptive words that offer none actual tangible description and shit like 'poetic' it's an immediate red flag the movie is fucktarded and not entertaining

Please kill yourself

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>>84556686
GET
OFF
MY
BOARD

Real talk: is there a single ONE (1) movie critic with opinions worth at least half of my smelly liquid shit?
>inb4armond

>>84556686
>>84556854
brainlets plz go

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>>84556686

>>84556994
>>84557079
>>84557116

no fuck you. I'm not sorry that I like movies that entertain not shitpieces that attempt to activate almonds and play with themes. Fuck this shit film I want my 90 minutes back.

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>>84557209
I did please arrest the poster above

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>>84556686
Lmao get fucked brainlet Coens have never made a bad film

>>84557268

no country for old men is extremely digestible, I pray to god you never have to sit through a bergman piece if this is your attitude

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>>84557107
Jew Brody

>>84557306
kill yourself cunt keep watching shit films and jerking yourself off to the fact that you can enjoy 90 minutes of theatrical abuse and call yourself smart.

no country for old men goes to shit in the second half, it starts out as fairly unpredictable but then its just one convenience after another. oh he finds the gps in the thing? sure 5 seconds later the guy is already at his door? oh the guy runs behind a car, nevermind now hes just simply gone. oh hes in a hospital, oh the bad guy already knows. oh he hid the money, nevermind the bad guy just finds it out of pure coincidence.

>>84557394
Funny that you started a thread expecting anyone to agree with you about this.
>theatrical abuse
haha you bitch about critics slapping words together and you come up with this phrase laughing my little butt off rn

>>84557394
What's your favorite film?

>>84557555
it's theatrical snuff porn, a flip phone film, a 90 minute go pro footage of taking a shit, I'll cal it whatever the fuck I want to call it.

>>84557526
thank you. It had a decent beginning plot but the rest is just an attempt to be artistic. It's gay and everyone in the film but javier bardem.

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>>84557306
>tfw Dad showed me O Brother Where Art Thou? when I was young
>had a good wholesome laugh with the family and made Dad uncomfortable when I asked him who the wacky cloaked guys were
>tfw saw and loved Big Lebowski, Raising Arizona, and Burn After Reading realized they were all by the same directors, who must be really funny
>torrent No Country without reading any reviews or synopses and put it on
>"I bet it's about some cantankerous old guy whose kids want him to move into a home or something, haha"
>mfw 15 minutes in
to say I was unprepared would be an understatement

>>84556686
>large budget
Why would that piss you off?

>>84557775
how can you not like this movie, it got what people crave, it got autismolytes

>>84557650
I have quite a few.

In no paticular order

Inception

Arrival

Jason Bourne trilogy

First 3 Die Hard

Stand By Me

Prisoners

Catch me if you can

The departed.

Mission Impossible series not the 1 or 2nd one though

>>84557775
>Descent of Man parody
>that stupid fucking expression
>those wacky proportions (how tall is this guy? He looks like a fucking dwarf)
I've never even seen this movie, but fuck I hate this poster

No Country For Old Men is a movie that should be impossible to hate. It's not artsy or pretentious, just a impeccably made movie with a fairly straightforward story.

>>84557858
this has to be a joke

>>84556686
I just watched Gran Torino and holy fucking shit, how could he fuck over his family like that? That qt3.14 grand daughter deserved his car for having to deal with his racist bullshit

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>>84557858
>shits on ncfom
>has pleb-tier """""kino""""" list

>>84557650
oh and spiderman series with Toby Macguire

>>84557923
what the fuck is "kino"?
>>84557895
No punchline so no

>>84557872
Are you from the future?

>>84557970
No Country For Old Men is kino

>>84557998
so shit and gay?

>>84557970
>what the fuck is "kino"?
you have to go back

>>84558105
Can I go back to before /tv/ became reddit with him?

>>84558105
no I've had enough of /bant/ /pol/ and /gif/ in a single day

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>>84557858

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>>84558230

>>84557858
Hahahahaha garbage. Kill yourself my dude

>>84557984
Are you implying that I'm stupid?
Maybe it's a shitty reason, but I don't really want to watch this movie because I'm pretty sure I'll hate it. Everything I know about the premise seems awful, like condescension became a person and wrote and directed a film.

If it's all some kind of ironic joke on the viewer and/or protagonist, or anyone else who sees the world solely in terms of "I'm smart, and everyone else is soooo dumb!", then maybe I could dig that. But even being reminded of that kind of attitude and confronting it is unpleasant. So I haven't seen it yet.

>>84557826
Audible kek. Saved

>>84558323
I have much to live for.

>>84557858
>Mission Impossible series not the 1 or 2nd one though
this has to be bait

>>84558378
iirc it's some dude who wakes up in the future and the world is retarded an brainwashed by the government and terry crews is the president. Better than fucking No country for old men.

>>84558378
I mean shit man no one cares if you watch it or not. I happened to catch it the couple of times it aired on tv, and its a nice 6 or 7/10. I just think your "this is reddit this is memes" attitude about something you have the faintest surface knowledge of is fucking stupid and that you're cancer.

>>84556686
what a fucking moron

>>84558536
fuck you

>>84558471
Yeah, that's what I'm pretty sure it's about. I don't know why that would make it better than No Country, though.
>>84558504
I didn't mention memes or reddit in that post, though. I see where you're coming from that my reasoning for not seeing it might be stupid, but then again, I watch films because I might like them, not because I might hate them. I have reason to believe I'd really dislike watching this movie. Maybe I'm just not the target audience. Nothing wrong with that, I figure.

>>84557306

I dunno, man. Hail,Caesar kind of sucked.

>>84558378

It's the first episode of Futurama, but instead of being impressed by the future Fry is baffled by it. It's also a pretty shitty movie in its own right.

>>84558630
Right you are Ken.
I feel like The Coen's have lost their touch with farcical comedies.

>talks shit about mcCarthy
>doesn't know anything at all

Do tv series count? I can't stand The Walking Dead or it's fans. I haven't watched Game of Thrones so I can't say anything about the show, but the fans can be unbearable. TWD is just awful though.

>>84558378
>like condescension became a person and wrote and directed a film.
You seem to be a bit on the defensive here. It's just a movie about some dumbass from the present going to the future (I never saw it complete, so I don't know how this happens) and becoming the smartest person alive because society became way stupider in all those years. It's just satire, so of course there's a kind of wise-ass attitude to it, but it's mostly a passable comedy that raises a couple of valid points, but never gets too preachy or condescending. At least I don't remember it doing so.
It's an ok "caught it on TV" movie.

>>84558630
I loved Hail Caesar. Saw it with my ex and she loved it, then showed it to my sister and a friend and they both liked it.

>>84559264
Yeah, maybe I'm projecting. I was that kind of prick in my early teens, so maybe it's just reflexive. But stuff with that kind of smug tone like the one I described just turns my stomach.

>>84556686
>it's fans
kys

>>84557775
I'm with you. When someone cites this movie as a prophetic of cultural decline I immediately know that person is a pretentious faggot who thinks they're just oh so fucking smart. No other flick has gratified pseuds with the reassurance that "yes, you are smarter than all your peers." than this piece of shit.

You talk like a fag and your shit's all retarded

There's a fist in my ass

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>>84557858

>>84561865
doesn't make it any less true you fucking conformist

>>84557858
what makes this post complete is the reddit spacing. I love everything about it.

>>84557858
Don't you take up enough space irl already?

>>84557858
Okay. Nothing more to see in this thread, anons. Move along. Move along. Just another OP being a giant faggot. You've seen one, you've seen 'em all. Just keep moving. Please don't give him any more (You's). It will only make him an even bigger faggot. Move along.

>>84556686
They couldn't even afford a soundtrack