/trek/ general

COMPUTER! Explain to me why a race capable of warp speed travel and replicator technology would still be using manned spacecraft and not artificial intelligence to explore the cosmos.

>>84306753
AIs are prone to malfunction and genocide.

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ATTENTION BAJORAN WORKERS

>>84306793
More than humans?

>>84306753
>>84306753
Because there's literally nothing else for people to do

On earth for example war, disease, and poverty no longer exists. People are free to be NEETS and sit around playing holo novels all day. But that's a pointless existence, so you get people joining Star Fleet to feel a sense of purpose in life.

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>>84306753

>>84306675
>a fanny
a wot guvna?

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would you have sex with a cardassian woman?

>>84307485
no but I want to be tortured by one

Who were the best Trek children and why?

>Naomi Wildman, Icheb, and the other Borg kids

>Jake Sisko and Nog

>WESLEY

>>84307485
Cardassian women are fine as hell, but it's also because of hiring fine models and actresses. Look up Tracy Scoggins, Melanie Smith, and Linda Thorsson. Those women were finer than the regular female crew members.

>>84307134
Yeah, that was his answer to everything. Including why would there be bald people in the 24th century when it would have been cured with Eugenics. One thing noticeable is how there were no fat people and people with glasses on ST because they obviously cured it by then as well. Why not baldness? Gene dying unfortunately was best thing to happen to the series once DS9 got around and they cured autism with Bashir and turned him into a genius.

>hire sexy actress
>bury her under feature-obscuring makeup and prosthetics
Nah, it's just Berman being Berman.

>>84307134
>Humans will evolve beyond the need for a sense of self preservation
Seems counterproductive

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>>84306886
YOU CAN STILL SURRENDER
AND SAVE YOUR LIVES

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>>84309491
Gul Dukat did nothing wrong

>>84307045
What sense of purpose did the queers taking drink orders in Ten forward get?

>>84309613
Sense of adventure? I think most people but the most deluded UBI-tards admit that 99.9% of people would sit on their ass and do nothing but consume if they didn't have to work.

>>84307287
Worfs head looks like a cunt, with the clit ridges.

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>>84309534
He left his job unfinished.

>>84309115
Every time I come to a Trek thread there's some bozo saying they could have 'fixed' this with genetics.

Eugenics Wars = Genetic Engineering Banned

It's that simple.

>>84309670
Were there really waiters? I must have missed it. I know Guinan did it because she was genuinely interested in people. Quark did it for love of profit. Sisko's Dad loved to cook.

Maybe waiters do get some form of payment but none of it has to go to the basics of living since all that is covered in the 24th century.

Star Trek economics confuse the hell out of me. They're post scarcity and by all accounts post-money but in DS9 they mention they get an allowance of some sort to spend with cultures who do still use money.

But if they can produce their own 'Federation Bucks' for nothing, wouldn't they be considered worthless as currency to races who's fortune has some sort of relation to something tangible?

>>84310708
>But if they can produce their own 'Federation Bucks' for nothing, wouldn't they be considered worthless as currency to races who's fortune has some sort of relation to something tangible?
Nah, they can probably be traded back to the Federation for goods. So some Ferengi shop serves Federation customers, gets a bunch of credits then can trade those credits to the Federation for shit that's valuable to their species, like replicator tech or something.

>>84310708
the Dabo girls were also waitresses, and the Bajoran ones earned money because Bajor right out of the occupation was more than willing to embrace profit.

Is it ever explained how the fuck Klingons managed to develop warp drive? Their culture has never shown any interest in scientific discovery on screen.

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>>84311020
Yes

>>84311020
I think they may have been partially uplifted by another race, not certain though

>>84307485

Hell yeah.

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Reminder; Section 31 literally did nothing wrong
>Tried to gas the fucking Founders and collapse the Dominion
>Get stopped during wartime by their own side

Why is the Federation so pussified?

>>84309491
that neck just says "authority"

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>its a "The entire universe takes time out of its day to take a gigantic shit on O'Brien" episode

>>84307134
>"Captain! Our probes indicate that the sector we are about to enter likely contains massive energy storms that would tear our ship apart in an instant!"
>"Stop being afraid of the unknown, Number One."
>*explodes*

>>84308378
>choosing anyone other than ALLAMARAINE girl

https://youtu.be/_IMBUa7w9K4

>>84311359
That captains name? Kathryn Janeway

>>84307287
https://youtu.be/O7mN3_Ze10M?t=6s

>>84311580
Why did the writers shit on Worf so bad?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=edflm7Hh3hs
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5LnwLn9vnKo

>>84311333
>MILES CAN YOU TAKE CARE OF MY PLANTS WHILE ME AND YOUR DAUGHTER ARE ON ANOTHER PLANET FOR THE NEXT 2 YEARS THANKS

>>84311625
even though his story in DS9 is retarded, its nice seeing him able to beat people in fights there

>>84311020

I thought it was because the romulans helped them out. The Klingons use disruptors, use cloaking devices and fly similar ships to what the romulans use. Warbirds and battleships instead of exploration cruisers. The romulans probably encountered them in the same way that the Vulcans met humans. The romulans though had a militaristic culture and knew the Klingons, though savage and volatile, could be exploited as a sort of extension of the romulans empire. At any moment the romulans could cease this agreement and bring Qronos to its knees.

>>84312506
>At any moment the romulans could cease this agreement and bring Qronos to its knees.
Didn't the Klingons beat the Romulans in a war?

>>84309139

maybe he got them to watch them apply the makeup

maybe the neck ridges went all the way down.

>>84311020
I thought they got it from the Hur'q occupation

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Favorite ships?

> Klingon Bird of Prey
> Romulan Warbird Valdore (pic related)
> Enterprise E
> Uss Vengeance
> Ferengi Marauder

6 = Among the best movies ever made
5 = Amazing / Superb
4 = Great
3 = Good
2 = Ok/Meh
1 = Bad
0 = Horrible

> Motion Picture
2
> Wrath of Khan
low 5/high 4
> Search Spock
3
> Voyage Home
3
> Final Frontier
1
> Undiscovered Country
5
> Generations
2
> First Contact
low 4
> Insurrection
High 1
> Nemesis
4
> 2009
4
> Into Darkness
4
> Beyond
4

>>84314643
weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeew

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>>84314365
pic related

>>84314643
> Motion Picture
3/4
> Wrath of Khan
5
> Search for Spock
2
> Voyage Home
4/5
> Final Frontier
2
> Undiscovered Country
5
> Generations
1/2
> First Contact
4
> Insurrection
1
> Nemesis
1
> 2009
4
> Into Darkness
2
> Beyond
3/4

>>84315420
>> Final Frontier
>2
>> Nemesis
>1
Preposterous...

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>>84308378
Nog, because he developed into a fine adult and had a lot of kino episodes.

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>>84309534
Gul Dukat did EVERYTHING wrong.

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>>84311641
>MILES WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU LIKE BASHIR MORE THAN ME???

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>>84311359
>>84311549
Are you the one that wrote those Janeway posts making fun of her bipolarity? Shit was hilarious, please post it every thread.

>>84315443
FF is a fine Trek concept hampered by lack of budget, writer's strikes and studio interference.

Nemesis is a dune buggy chase and Tom Hardy being angry.

>>84308378
>>84315493
Exactly, Nog post-Heart of Stone is God Tier, Naomi comes second as she had motivation (wanted to be the Captain's assistant) unlike the resst, except Jake I guess but he never seemed very dedicated to becoming a writer, it was just something to do when Nog was gone.

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>>84309534

>>84309534
Imo it really depends if Bajor was pre warp before the occupation.
If they weren't, it was wanton slaughter and an invasion, pure and simple, Dukat just has a really fucked way of rationalizing it.
If they were still agrarian and shit with wooden ships, the occupation did nothing wrong as it uplifted a bunch of dirt farming hippies into capable guerilla warriors and a stable government with a strong religious pillar

>>84306961
Obviously. have you seen the type of unexpected shit real crews have to put up with? All it would take is one "alien computer virus" and your entire civilisation is fucked. Just look at Data, he was turned "evil" more than once.

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>>84309534
>>84315702
>>84309491
>>84306886
>"Hey guys, we have to start writing for the new season, what do you wanna do with one of the most interesting and morally ambiguous antagonists we've ever had in this franchise?"
>"I know, let's turn him into demon-possessed maniac!"
>"O-okay..."

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Captain.
Message from The Doctor.
He has betrayed the entire crew again and has gotten three people killed because a society we found like a day ago said that they appreciate him more than we do, or maybe they're made out of holograms, or whatever. He is requesting an immediate rescue mission because it turns out the people he betrayed us for are actually big ol' meanies.

Your orders?

>>84315443
>>84315626
Final Frontier starts out great and shits the bed as soon as Saibok reveals his stupid plan

>>84315770
I don't think Bajor has Warp drive, even now. All the Bajoran ships they use are shit sub-light fighters, the only reason it doesn't trigger the Prime Directive is that the Cardassians have already spoiled the secret.

>>84315876
>dukat
>morally ambiguous

no one ever wakes up one day and thinks to themselves "i'm (going to be) on the wrong side of history! this is great!" Everyone rationalizes their actions/behaviors as right/good.

>>84315876
Dukat wasn't morally ambiguous mate, he was straight up evil. All he did was make up bullshit rationalizations and tell himself other Cardassians would've been much harsher so what he was doing was alright, but he was a mass murderer. The fact his character was well developed and he had an actual personality doesn't change the fact he's space Hitler.

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>>84307485
Yes.

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>mfw watching through DS9 for the first time in my life after TOS, TNG and VOY
My god the quality of this shits all over the entire series of VOY and a fair chunk of TNG.
Up to season 6
Just finished first section 31 episode where they try to recruit Bashir by making him doubt his own loyalties to starfleet
> if push comes to shove, will we sacrifice our own morals just for self preservation?
> I hope I never have to answer that.

> next episode is On A Pale Horse
> sisko being tormented by getting very very dirty in order to bring the Romulans into the war by lying and handing experimental bioweapon shit to strangers and bribing quark

> Garak just false flags the senator anyway

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>>84308378

>>84315928
I would assume they have warp drive now
The Federation even tried to get them to join

>>84316002
DS9 had the best writing for sure but the cast was meh. Avery Brooks has the acting range of a potato. The only emotion he can convey is barely repressed anger.

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>>84316002
>On a Pale Horse

>>84315876
"From the moment we arrived on Bajor it was clear that we were the superior race, but they couldn't accept that. They wanted to be treated as equals, when they most certainly were not. Militarily, technologically, culturally – we were almost a century ahead of them in every way. We did not choose to be the superior race. Fate handed us that role and it would have been so much easier on everyone if the Bajorans had simply accepted their role. But no... day after day they clustered in their temples and prayed for deliverance and night after night they planted bombs outside of our homes. Pride.. stubborn, unyielding pride. From the servant girl that cleaned my quarters, to the condemned man toiling in a labor camp, to the terrorist skulking through the hills of Dahkur Province... they all wore their pride like some... twisted badge of honor."

"And you hated them for it."

"Of course I hated them! I hated everything about them! Their superstitions and their cries for sympathy, their treachery and their lies, their smug superiority and their stiff-necked obstinacy, their earrings, and their broken, wrinkled noses!"

"You should have killed them all, hm?"

"Yes! Yes!! That's right, isn't it?! I knew it. I've always known it. I should've killed every last one of them! I should've turned their planet into a graveyard the likes of which the galaxy had never seen! I should've killed them all."

"And that is why you're not an evil man."

So morally ambiguous

>>84307485
>tfw you will never fuck a Cardie
>Or a Rommie
>Or a Klink

>>84316067
Not to mention surrendering Cardassia to the Dominion, becoming Space Gaddafi, and getting hundreds of millions of his own people slaughtered.

Dukat did literally nothing right

>>84316042
He doesn't emote with his eyes enough, that's plain to see

Best acting he did was in the 1950s Sci Fi writer episode where he had a mental breakdown after losing his job.
I think Jake called him a nigger in that episode too.

>>84316042
The cast was great, Odo, Kira, O'Brien, Quark were all top tier at least

>>84316090
I wouldn't try that with a Klingon that would probably involve knives, latex and honor and I'm not comfortable with those

>>84310659
Genetic Engineering was allowed in the Federation for the explicit purposes of correcting severe birth defects.

So. You could fix shit like downs syndrome, but you couldn't use it to enhance what was considered a normal person.

>>84316121
> implying gaddafi did anything wrong
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W6syr1tjbgA

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>>84316179
No it involves lots of punching and general roughness.

I would desu

>>84316179
Klingon sex involves the women hurling heavy objects while the men read love poetry.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ITmnIY_H24o

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>>84316042
> cast was meh

Only complaint I have with the cast is Avery Brooks can't move his eyebrows and Jadzia just seemed to give up and phone it in past season 5, except where her and worf go to rescue a cardassian defector, but she gets shot and worf botches the mission, proving mixed gender units don't work even in the 24th century.
The makeup in that ep did more emotive acting than her though

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>>84310708
The negro in Lower Decks worked in Ten Forward. He listened in to Riker's conversation about who he wanted to promote when serving him a drink.

>>84316067
He was still batshit after his daughter died when he said that to sisko, Tbh

>>84316217
>boob windows
they can bully my peanus weanus any day

>>84316217
Assuming Sisko's right when he says Klingons are as strong as Vulcans, would a human man beat a Klingon woman in a fight?

Not talking about onscreen choreography because those don't pay attention to their own lore

>>84316492
Depends on how buff the guy is I guess

>>84316492
You'd break a couple bones for klingon-human sex.
A couple of cracked ribs and a dislocated arm and leg would be standard sex injuries.

In a full on fist fight?
The klingon would throw you across the room like a sack of potatoes

>>84316571
let's say it's the average /trek/ poster

>>84316608
Alexander Tier of beatdown would occur.

>>84316608
They'd get the shit kicked out of them by even Alexander

>>84315892
"jesus christ tuvok, save him. If we lose him the only decent episodes will be sevens and she isn't allowed to get her tits out"

>>84311020
I think they stole it from a visiting alien species, like how the Terrans stole Vulcan tech in the Mirror Universe.

>>84315892
>tfw unironically enjoy most of Voyager
It's cheesy, and Neelix is pure cancer but there's something so comfy about it.

>>84316492
I'd imagine Vulcans would be very formidable fighters and every bit the match for Klingons....their focus and calm coupled with their strength would counter klingon sperg rage rather well

>>84307485
yes

also they interpret insults and disdain as sexy

>>84311333
>it's a miles has 20 years of imprisonment and torture implanted in his mind as false memories episode

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>>84315685
>That episode where Nog has PTSD over his lost leg and Jake kicks him out of their room into the holodeck and later on brings his roastie to Nog's holodeck.

Name me a worst Trek friend.

>>84317026
>No ambition
>A coward when put in danger
>Lives like a total slob
>Is a shit friend
>Totally dependent on his father

Is he truly /ourguy/?

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>>84317087
>Mfw Bashir reads the article where he says he left Bashir for dead.

>>84315892
Post the other one where Aliens invade Janeways ship and kill everyone but she lets them live, and the other where she blows those aliens that did nothing.

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>>84316768
Captain.
The Doctor has changed his demands.
He now says he will only, quote, allow us the privilege of his return to Voyager if he is allowed to sing ballads about the rights of holograms every day over the intercom.

Your orders?

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>>84317157
> mfw 20ccs of hydrochloric acid admistered to the little shit during every physical

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>>84317259
>mfw it's a Doctor or Neelix focused episode

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>it's a data learns a life lesson episode

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Captain, let's have dinner. I will tell you in depth about my spiritual beliefs that only vaguely resemble actual Native American traditions in a sort of offensive way. Then I will suddenly never refer to those customs and rituals again after some public backlash, my character will never do anything interesting ever again, and my actor will be visibly bored and miserable in every scene.
It will be a night to remember.

>>84318025
Maquis scum

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>>84317794
>hating doctor episodes

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>>84317794

Neelix is literally Snarf from the Thundercats put on a star fleet ship.

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>>84318094
Meanwhile, on. The defiant
> COMMANDER....DAX, HOW ABOUT WE....SET COURSE AND PREPARE TO.... POISON THE MARQIS COLONY
> I'll be in my ready room
> EDDINGTON!!!!!!!!!!!!!

>>84318058
>Marquis and Starfleet on the same ship
>A major point of conflict for the series
>Completely resolved by the second episode and never comes up again except for a handful of episodes throughout the series
I don't really understand how they fucked that up so badly. All the marquis characters are fully integrated into the crew in 3 episodes.

>>84318522
No Cardies on the ship, that's why everything was solved quickly.

>>84318522
It's almost like Voyager was horribly mismanaged on almost every level.

>>84318522
>>84318413
>Marquis

It's Maquis you fucking petaQ.

>>84318659
Because Chakotay was a total cuck
>Our guys make up a 3rd of your crew now, we need to compromise
>No. You'll act like Starfleet officers and follow everything by the book.
>O-Ok

>>84315770
Tng
Picard says bajor was warp capable well before humans.

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>>84318658
There actually was one Cardassian on the ship, disguised as a human. She threw off her disguise, betrayed the crew, and sided with the Kazon of all people, retarded space cavemen with idiot clown hair, because she wanted to... go with them and... uh... become powerful by... um... hmm...

She did it just to be a dick, really. Star Trek has a pro-alien-acceptance message but man I guess some stereotypes exist for a reason.

>>84315531
I'd fuck her hard.

>>84315531
Why was Keiko such a cunt?

>>84318812
Keska was half-cardie though, wasn't she?

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Friendly reminder Garak was the child molesting serial killer in Dirty Harry.

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>I love... BASHIR

So natural and totally not forced.

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>>84318984
I thought she was just pure Cardassian with heavy plastic surgery to appear Bajoran. I might be misremembering.

Either way, she decided allying with THESE THINGS were a safer bet than going home with Voyager.

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>>84319112
So natural and totally not forced.

>>84319120
> w-we need allies
> that's why I'm allying with the space ghetto niggers over my friends

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>>84319191
I win

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>>84319362
Not so fast.

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>>84319448

>>84318812
If they were heading back towards the Alpha Quadrant how did she keep showing up? Were the Kazon following Voyager?

>>84319494
Didn't she die in the same episode she defected?
IIRC she only showed up again in time travel episodes or that one where she was a hologram.

>>84319491
>You will never be a helpless Terran who catches the Intendant's eye and now has to pleasure her or die trying

Really gets you feelin'

>>84319494
Yea, wanted that sweet replicator tech. Although can't remember why voyager never just gave it to them, it wasn't a pre warp civ considering they gave the hirogen holodeck tech it's not like they can't when it suits.

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>>84319448
I like her and her jew nose

>>84306675
Worf is a fucking bitch ass crybaby
even by human standards
>muh klingon ancestors!
fuck you, Actual Klingons loves life And death
they sing and write warpoetry, not just kick holograms around twice a week
Alexander is a better Klingon than him

>>84319572
Nah there was a few. She even managed to steal the ship after disabling the self destruct, was relatively clever plan for voyager.

>>84319448
>Sisko had a prime Bajoran who would have done anything he asked for the Prophets
>Never once took advantage

Is this the most unrealistic thing about Star Trek?

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> tfw just found out Nana visitor had a kid with Alexander Siddig and Andrew Robinson was the godfather

>>84319665
Is garak a serial killer?

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>>84319701
I loved it when Jadzia called him out on it.

>>84319572
Oh wait, there was that whole subplot where she had that baby. I completely forgot that shit even existed.

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>>84319574
>You will never be pirate sisko
>robbin' freighters and fuckin' the intendant
>Talking shit on smiley whenever you return to the station

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>>84319742
> mfw fucks odo in the show
> fucks Bashir irl

Sisko gets kassidy Yates, even though she keeps disappearing for seasons at a time

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>>84319701
>That episode where Worf is put in command of the warbird Alexander is serving on

>>84319831
Crazy to think back when DS9 was airing race mixing was still so unacceptable they had to write in a black character for Siskos love interest

>>84319909
>Jake goes on and on about how he's finally found the right woman for Benjamin
>Watch the next ep
>Turns out she's black

legitimately keked

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>>84319862
> he accidentally locks himself in a hallway
> he calls for red Alert because he accidentally left the training simulation running
> He didn't knock out that smartass klingon the first chance he got
> he can't even hold a ba'atleth correctly

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>>84318413
Does anybody know the correct solution to this?

You should be able to solve this one, /tv/.

>>84320025
Multi track drifting of course
Just until the dominion wipes them our

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>>84320022
HE'S TRYING

>>84320025
Neither the Cardassians nor Maquis deserve to live. Wipe them all out

>>84319909
Couldn't shack up with Jadzia, it'd damage the symbiote.
Worf must be a bit small Tbh, otherwise dax would be long dead

>>84320022
And who's to blame for all of Alexander's mistakes?

Worf literally forgot he had a son. What the hell happened to TNG's "im proud of you my son" speech?

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>>84320092
> mfw he ends up a fucking diplomat in STO

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>>84319972
Name one thing Jake Sisko did right other than befriending Nog.

>>84320199
He was not klingon enough
His mother made him weak and the Enterprise even weaker.
Then he got dumped on his grandparents like the failure he is.

He was stuffed from birth, it's not worfs fault for trying and realizing he's a weak little shit who will never be a klingon warrior

>>84320300
Why the fuck would anyone want to be a Klingon warrior anyway? A warrior culture when you've mastered interstellar travel is fucking retarded

>>84320275
He said Nigger to a Nigger (himself)
Didn't Dukat and Weyoun shoot him for breaking into a car in Far beyond the stars?

>>84320275
He didn't join those fucking losers in Starfleet.

>My daddy/mommy did X so now I have to do X too!
Get a life, Wesley.

>>84320338
Yes, based Weyoun showed him and Sisko who's boss.

>>84320334
Because worf is the equivalent of a plastic irishman, living outside the culture but claiming to embrace it when he visits.
At least that's what he was in most of TNG.
He's a klingon through and through in DS9

>>84320351
Is Nog a loser for joining starfleet instead of being a scamming kike for the rest of his life?

>>84320351
>Hahaha i'm a reporter i'm going to stay behind and document the dominion regime!
>WTF Weyoun why are you censuring my articles that criticize the Dominion?
>WTF Kira and Odo why are you guys not killing everyone and fighting the power with me?
>Hey dad, i'm glad you're back now i don't have to do anything anymore.

>>84320498
Nog is best boy.

>>84320498
Nog joining Starfleet is escaping his father's shadow.
Jake joining Starfleet is staying firmly within his father's shadow.

>>84320025
Rules of Acquisition you can't make a deal if you're dead

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>>84320498
>being a scamming kike
Hey! That's....Well not entirely inaccurate.

>>84320614
wenn Quark scratch his ears, doesn't it count as public masturbation for a ferengi ?

>>84320558
>Nog joining Starfleet is escaping his father's shadow.
Rom has a shadow? Is Quark Rom's shadow?

>>84320657
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J_OhHwfIJhQ

If the Doctor in Voyager could look like anyone, why did he choose to keep looking like Robert Picardo?

>>84320933
They just left out the 3 months he took the shape of a walking 8 foot penis

>>84320933
He couldn't be bothered to pay for the extra skin packs.

>>84320933
"who does the doc look like today?"
"i dont fucking know just ask the computer"

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>>84320977
might have been cool

I'm looking for something to do with my proton torpedos, any recommendations?

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>>84321049
A full spread

>>84320933
Could he though? I thought he was hardcoded to look like Zimmerman

>>84321049
Lace them with Trilithium and fuck over those uppity Maquis

>>84321170
The 2nd gen ones looked like Andy Dick

>>84321270
Yeah but all the first gen ones looked like Zimmerman which made him really butthurt because they were all sent to clean sewers up and he didn't like the fact there were thousands of holograms that look like him scraping shit off the walls of the Enterprise septic tanks.

>>84321270
But that doesn't mean each one could change its shape. We saw them trying to make a third gen Bashir one

>>84319112
So she was supposed to pick Woof just because Jadzia was in love with him before?

>>84321872
No, fuck Worf too. She should have ended up alone.

Honestly i rather she be with Quark than Bashir and Worf.

Best TOS episodes, go!
Hard Mode: No City on the Edge of Forever or Balance of Terror

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>>84322370
The one with the furry shits.

>>84318025
My favorite tidbit is that he just kept asking for insane pay raises to get kicked off and they just kept saying yeah here you go.

>>84316182
no. Bashir's dad got sent to prison for it.

>>84322410
Sauce please

>>84322053
Quark is better off alone with his own holosuite

>>84320662
The reason he gives Sisko is that he doesn't want to end up like his father.
Though I'm sure Quark owns the rights to Rom's shadow somehow.

>>84322407
You mean the one where Sisko and co helped save the day through temporal shenanigans?

>>84322370
Mirror Mirror

>>84322370
There are literally only 4 good TOS episodes, those two and Tribbles and Mirror, Mirror

>>84322622
You bet.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gHiJXfQ1z9Y

>>84321170
>>84321338
He could. He added a dick and changed his face when he went down to the time distortion planet to impregnate the locals

>>84317359
Reminder
Julian and Sarina realized that they would need expert assistance in dealing with Uraei. To this end, the trio traveled to the Orion home world under assumed names. Once there, they met with Data who had retired from Starfleet and was living and working on the planet under an alias. Data’s first attempt to infiltrate and monitor Uraei resulted in the group’s location being revealed and compromised. Subsequently, the group had to fight armed agents and go on the run.
The trio was joined by Data’s daughter, Lal. The group took refuge on Cardassia as guests of Castellan Elim Garak. Freelance operatives were sent to retrieve the group. While Sarina was taken hostage, the rest of the group escaped and continued their efforts. In order to eliminate Uraei, Data and Julian broke into teams and infiltrated both Memory Alpha and Memory Prime respectively to plant a computer virus that would eliminate Ureai.
Bashir and Data were able to implement the code at both Memory Alpha and Memory Prime. Julian was badly hurt when he was forced to engage in combat with Sarina, who had been brainwashed by Section 31. After the code to eliminate Uraei had been implemented Uraei's brainwashing forced Sarina to commit suicide. Julian was rescued by Memory Alpha security personnel. He was then treated by Doctor Simon Tarses of the USS Aventine. Tarses used his genotronic technique to repair Bashir's damaged spinal cord. Regardless of this, Julian was rendered catatonic, mute and wheelchair bound by the psychological trauma of losing Sarina. Captain Dax and Tarses delivered Bashir to Elim Garak, one of three people who could be trusted with him (along with O'Brien and Dax). Garak subsequently took Julian into his home where he was tended to by the castellan's medical staff.

>>84316025
The federation doesn't share technology unless you're a member.

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>>84316600

>The klingon would throw you across the room like a sack of potatoes

but these dubs would get me through it

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>>84322945
I read that book. It made Garashir canon. 10/10 read.

How was the Darwin Genetics Station allowed? Isn't "making the new human race" kind of against the law in the Federation?

>>84315928
>some random drunk guy developed warp drive on earth
>a functioning society with knowledge of other planets and aliens can't

Bajor is a fucking joke

>>84323169
>Garak's dreams finally come true

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>>84322945
>>84323169

>Garak would clean a catatonic Bashir every morning

living the dream

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>>84315928
>>84316025
>>84323211
B-but muh ancient Bajoran Lightships!

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>>84323216
>>84323286

>>84310708
>Maybe waiters do get some form of payment
NO. Stop making up bullshit, there are so many newfags in here they start believing your headcanon (>>84310959). There is no currency in the Federation. TOS was inconsistent on this issue, but by the time of TNG, it's official, no money at all.

Now to the question:

>Why be a waiter in the future?
What do you do if you want to explore the galaxy but don't have the brains or bravery for Starfleet? You get a civilian job on a starship, like a waiter, or hairdresser, and live the life of luxury for a few hours of easy work a day. It's that simple.

>>84310708
>in DS9 they mention they get an allowance of some sort to spend with cultures who do still use money
No they don't, this is just an idea we've been throwing around in these threads to try and explain how they pay their bar bills and buy things on the promenade in DS9, because there is no explanation given in the show.

>>84323854
What about gold-pressed latinum?

>>84324193
That has nothing to do with the Federation, it's used by the Ferengi and other races.

>>84323457
hey Bashirfag how you been?

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>>84324423
Pretty good. I recently paid $600 as part of the DS9 doc kickstarter to have a small private meet and greet eith Siddig El Tahir El Fadil El Siddig Abderrahman Mohammed Ahmed Abdel Karim El Mahdiand the DS9 cast at Star Trek Las Vegas.

I am going to see if I can maybe lure him away from the con for 15 minutes so I can go suck his dick in a Carl Jr's parking lot.

>>84324656
Don't do it.

>>84324656
Please do it.

>>84324656
>cut muslim dick

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>>84324727
Fuck you there are at least three of them near the strip and they are all open 24 hours.

>>84325124
They should have fucked. Kira and Odo is fucking awful.

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>>84325163
Kira should have become real and fucked me

>>84325163
This desu, a Kira/Dukat sex scene would have been kino

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>>84311927
>even though his story in DS9 is retarded
Which part? This was the only thing that happened to him that I'd describe as retarded, but I loved it anyway because Jadzia a shit.

>>84325201
Nobody would ever fuck you anon

>>84325259
where the hell did he transport from?

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>>84325259
>Ezrifags

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>>84314365
S͎̠ṯḙ̙͚p̰̣̼̻͚͇ a͎̯͠s̼̬̜̳̠̜̠i̦̞̩͍͓̪d̳̰̮̬͜e͉̯̱̖̱̱͘ ̪͇̜̝͎͘w̴͔a̼̖̗͇̫ṛ̣̩m̗f̢̼̮̘̼͇͚a͓̭̳͎͠g̖͚͚̹̹̀s̸̪̹͚͈͓͍,̥͎̪̜͖̞ ̹͕̰̦͎w̤e̹͔͇̟ ̖͍͎̰̟͍g̺͟o͇t ͙̪̙͝ͅt̯͉̻̮͝h͎̰͎̩̙͙i̘̘̪͚͘s̢͙͇̤̺̟

>>84325312
Dominion transporters have a greater range than Federation sensors, they can never work out where they're beaming to or from because they never detect any ships and the Dominion don't have cloaks (or if they do, they never use them in the war, which would be stupid).

>>84325346
What is there to find attractive about that boring, monotone nobody? Jadzia has no personality at all, she's just Kurzon but a woman.

>>84324930
He's going to say no, and he's going to hate you.

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>>84325587
>not wanting to fuck a dude in a hot chick's body

You gay or something bro?

>>84325749
>The size of those Risan dildos

"""""""""pleasure""""""""""" planet

>>84325473
I thought in Tears of the Prophets he still had that Federation shuttlecraft he "borrowed" in Waltz that he also used to Skype Kira to tell her he SPOON'd her mom.
So it should've been a Feddie transporter beam effect, unless he modified it with those hi tech Dominion transporters.
/autism

>>84325749
how come only TOS and ENT sexualized their hot male leads?

>>84319039
His girly scream in this is hilarious

>>84319191
They spent literally years setting it up though, what makes it forced?

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>>84325346
Come get some, bitch.

>>84320025
Anyone who doesn't side with the Maquis is a cukhold to lizard people, and the government.

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Friendly reminder that Ezri and Ziyal are beards becuase their love was too real and pure for Rick "Dicks Only Go in Chicks" Berman

>>84324656
Autism

>>84315947
Dukat actually realizes he's evil and embraces it when he gets stranded with Sisko.

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I thought sisko wasn't mad that picard locutus'd his wife anymore?

>>84321119
Belay that order, perhaps the torpedoes can be reasoned with.

So are klingon and cardassian penises similar to humans?

Because Dax got KLANGED and Kira's mom got SPOONED and they came out fine. You'd expect some sort of genital barbs or something

inb4 >sexual organs

>>84323069
Even that has some exceptions, they tried to give a bunch of industrial replicators to Cardassia after the Klingon invasion (the ones Eddington broke his cover to steal)

>>84323169
Welcome back, you glorious faggot, did you see my post yesterday or is this a coincidence?

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>>84326800
Cardies have ridged hemipenises which are normally sheathed and are retractable like most repitles.

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>>84316002
>Up to season 6

Trolling works better if the reader doesn't feel sorry for you.

>>84326679
What crazy bullshit is this

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>>84325953
He was briefly working with the Dominion at the time though, he'd just been on Cardassia Prime, they probably had a Dominion ship on their side of the border transport him there, then he beams himself back with a communicator when he's done eating the orb energy or whatever.

It wasn't until after this plan destroyed the wormhole that they kicked him out, so he later had to rely on his stolen Federation tech and hiding out on Empok Nor.

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>>84326800
Humanoid penises don't all look like human penises. While setups similar to penis/vagina are the most common, there are species with much more exotic genitals and multiple sexes that get even more confusing.

Federation sex ed in schools teaches young citizens guidelines on navigating unfamiliar sex parts safely and painlessly. Any citizen can also arrange to meet with a Federation physician specializing in interspecies sexual intercourse with any questions.

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>>84326873
No. This is my first time actually posting on 4chan in months. I came back to lurk the Twin Peaks threads and I ended up here again.

>First contact is supposed to take place in 40 years

>>84326959
Mirror Universe lad

>>84327338
Bashir and Garak or Bashir and O'Brien?

>>84327338
How do you feel that Bashir was cucked by Worf?

>>84327430
It takes place on my 72nd birthday, if I'm still alive and the world hasn't gone to shit by then I intend to spend it in Montana. Just in case.

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>>84326679
holy kek how have i never seen this treachery before

>>84327624
Bashir was cucked by Keiko.

>>84327430
>ship door slides open
>Vulcan steps out
>sees President Barron Trump
>points and laughs
>turns around, keeps laughing
>gets back on ship
>flies away

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>>84327624
Not as bad as Bashir being cucked by Rom.

>>84327788
>le fug drumpf :DDDD

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>>84327788
>Ship door slides open
>Vulcan steps out
>Welcome to my boat

>>84327788
ebin drumpf Xd

>>84327817
Didn't they break up before she started responding to his clumsy advances though? If anything, Rom cucked Zimmerman.

6 Breen warships vs 1 Borg cube: who wins?

We never saw no refrigerated Borg, so my money's on the Breen.

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DUUHHHHHHHHHHH

Odo's starting to piss me off. He's such a stupid, insecure and gullible fuck. First the female Founder is fooling him easily then that other changeling played by Martok, putting ideas in his head which he's accepting way to quickly.

>>84327896
How do I get a body like this?

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Why do they keep pushing Star Trek back chronologically? Why can't we have a new series set in the TNG or DS9 eras?

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>>84328484
Dont eat anything for like two weeks and inject caulk into you viens so they really harden and stand out.

>>84328436
Odo is basically a kid, that's why he's a shit shapeshifter, he showed up centuries early due to the wormhole and they were hoping he'd have learned how to perfectly imitate the planet he showed up on, creep them the fuck out, get persecuted, learn how to turn into a space whale and fly home.

It's not surprising that he falls for their shit, but yeah, it is a bit tiresome. I think you've covered the major points though, sounds like you're near the end, where are you up to?

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>>84328591
Everytime I see Ethan Phillips I have the urge to punch him in the balls.

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Hakoochymoya

>>84327310
Vulcans actually have a really weird thing like a hollow flower looking tube with tentacles coming out of it IIRC

>>84328833
Bashirfaggot's fanfiction is not canon.

That's from "Take my ass at the Holosuite", right?

>>84328414
>DUHHHH A SPECTRE IS HAUNTING FERENGINAR

>>84328632
I've watched DS9 multiple times, I just don't remember this bothering me this much before. I also thought he kinda had a pretty good grasp of how things work in life by the time of said events. And he's a goddamn security officer\law enforcement\detective guy too!

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>>84328924
There are pics of Vulcan dicks that were published in the unofficial TOS zine in 1972

>>84329052
Yeah, he's got a lot of experience with humanoids and is very good at categorising them, but the Founders are better and he doesn't know their Jedi mind games yet.

>>84329097
You dirty, dirty thing.

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>>84328805
Bless you

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Why do none of the Cardassians in DS9 wear their helmets?

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>>84329097
It brings me comfort knowing that people have been drawing hypothetical alien dicks for like 50 years.

>>84329203
Those were a mistake, they look stupid and they restrict the field of vision below the horizon and dead center which could mean they miss a mine or mis-identify a weapon.

>>84329267
But what if they fall off their bikes?

>>84329341
What do you think the spoon on their forehead is for?

>>84329254
>>84329097
Do you happen to have a Ferengi Penis?

I need it for research.

>>84329097
>>84329254
>Let's see what it looks like, Spock,' Kirk said as he knelt, peeling the briefs over Spock's hips. He laughed softly as he surveyed the alien design. 'Almost like a woman.' Spock shivered as Kirk's fingers rubbed the soft, furred lips of the genital pouch, centered high on the pubic mound. Lips so swollen and sensitive now. Kirk's thumbs slid along the moist inner surface of the labia, parted, opened them, revealing the rounded head of the cock, a glistening green jewel framed within. Kirk's breath touched him there, moist and tickling. Spock felt the first head begin to come forth, shy, eager, responding to that delicate touch.

>>84311020
i always assumed reverse engineering from a crashed ship, or maybe recruited by romulans as planet jackers

>>84329401
The Cardassian race is so old and advanced that they'e evolved to be able to survive headshots with projectile weapons.

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>>84329412
No, but my headcanon is that their dicks are similar to an echidnas

>>84329401
I think the makeup artist said their spoons are their equivalent of a bellybutton

>>84329412
Well we do know one thing for sure they're circumcised

>>84316398
psst. those are the only hairless part of their breasts

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>>84329155
And this Great Link thingy. Maybe it's like sex on cocaine.

Anyway, what's up with this bro?
I always wanted to see him in action. He's supposed to be a bodyguard right? I wish he smacked someone at the bar or tore some Jem Hadar soldier in half at least once. But no.

>>84329692
>Thinking that muppet motherfucker could take on Jem'Hadar

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>>84329425
The worst part is i'm imagining Shatner and Nimoy.

>>84329412
>tfw you will never rub one out with Jake and Nog in cargo bay seven after a day of looking at Major Kira's ass.

>>84329692
Ira Steven Behr wanted a spinoff with Morn and Maihar'du
Two big guys that never speak (but are actually super chatty, just not on-screen) solving mysteries together
I'd watch it

>>84329752
He's a huge motherfucker, a freak, supposedly dangerous and very strong, entrusted with Zek's safety. Or so it seems, no?

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Where is this episode from?

>>84329843
Season 1 for sure, some of the early Q episodes, the one where he tempts Riker I believe.

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>>84329425
Jesus Christ mate

>>84320275
he slayed tons of puss

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>>84329203
Outlawed shortly before the time of DS9, in the same galactic treaty that banned Ferengi Energy Whips.

>>84329843
It's the titular scene from Season 1, episode 18 "Worf and Wesley and Penile Barbs"

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>>84329906
I wonder where he got that from.

>>84329944
Would you let Jake slay your puss?

>>84329967
DS9 still acknowledges the whips actually
I know I ruined your joke

>>84329425
>There . . . there . . . I'll show you . . ." Kirk repeated, stroking steadily at the tender, changing flesh. Fascinated, he watched the three petals curl back to reveal glistening chartreuse surfaces studded with hypersensitive spots of darker green, the two side tendrils gracefully uncoiling to stand like oiled serpentine honor guards beside the rising, proud, gleaming central shaft. "Like an orchid," Kirk whispered, "or a cross between . . . an orchid and a great green anthurium . . .. Oh, it's beautiful! What are these two things for?" He ran his fingers along the wet, quivering tendrils.

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>>84330013
What is the age of consent on a Federation space station?

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>you now remember that episode where jake had a bajoran girlfriend with massive tits

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She's a damn fine looking lady. But holy shit, she's a bad actress and the Jadzia character is mighty annoying and poorly written.

>>84329760
>>tfw you will never rub one out with Jake and Nog in cargo bay seven after a day of looking at Major Kira's ass.
I don't want to see Nog rub is ears like a pervert while I'm thinking about the Major's ass

>>84330148
Quick, someone describe Jadzia's personality without mentioning Curzon

>>84330134
The real reason the Cardies occupied them was that the Bajorans have the best titty genes in the galaxy

>>84330148
>It's a Jadzia talks about her more interesting past lives character

>>84330186
>tfw wenn you realize all the chemistry they could build up between her and Sisko was wenn they talked about Curzon who actualy never appear on screen.

>>84330185
Nog has to rub 3 things at the same time, you're going to have to help him.

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>it's a Quark becomes a tranny and Zek wants to stroke his lobes. Also Rom is secretly gay too.

>>84330121
Depends on the species. What would you let Jake do to you?

>>84326679
Is it nighttime or daytime? I can't tell

>>84330257
no I won't and Jake would be probably more than willing to

>>84311020
>designing the ability to wage war faster and farther away
>not honorable

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>>84330113
The ride never ends

>>84330243
Curzon is shown briefly on the operating table when they stuff the worm into Jadzia.

And don't forget Sisko actually fucked Jadzia. The one from the other side but nonetheless.

>>84330352
You don't understand anon, they allowed you to share their special spot. The spot where all the light in the promenade converges in the Major's ass. Now, do you want rub his ears or his ferengi cock with 2 heads?

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>>84330360
>We want funding to break the light speed barrier
>Sounds like nerd shit, denied
>Wait, what we meant was we want to fight and kill the laws of physics
>mfw

>>84330013
reddit no doubt

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>>84330320
Nothing. My body is Mecca and only one man may go on hajj inside me.

>>84330298
Literally the worst episode in DS9. It was funny for a second but then it got akward really fast once everyone started trying to fuck Quark.

>>84330457
Based Chief Engineer Gowron

>>84330451
well if that's what its take... but he better clean those damn ears I don't want to have any ear-wax in my hand while I'm beating my meat.