Would you turn down free fucking pizza?

he needed a computer

No, but this movie has taught me to murder and bury the evidence just in case, should the opportunity arise.

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Anyone who says they would is lying.

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>>84288265
I wouldn't even answer the door desu

>>84288471
Damn it, go away, go away. So tired of this. Friggin' go away you freaks.

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>>84288599
wagey is ragey?

>>84288371
That brunette alone would be a cute..but next to Ana de Armas she's a 2/10

>>84288371
Ana is a god damn angel

>>84288265
No, but this guy really should have known better.

>A film based on the premise that Keanu is continuously unable to overcome two small teenage girls

>>84288371
his house reminds me of the one he owns in john wick. it's like a john wick spin off.

>>84289025
He had just had surgery

>>84288675
They're both brunettes do stupid jigger. Just because some bitch dyed her hair blonde doesn't mean it is.

>>84289311
You're retarded for thinking that's what they implied.

>>84289311

>Just because someone dyed the shirt blue doesn't mean it is

>>84289311
Both of them are wearing wigs in the movie, you see them in the extended ended having swapped them

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>>84288919

>>84288919
more like succubus

>>84289435
she's pretty but looks dumb as fuck

>>84289469
The response of someone who gets angry when he sees a good too pretty to be in his league.

>>84289435
actually in love

send help

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>>84288371
The brunette is hot too, like 7.5/10. Would fuck silly. She just gets overshadowed by Ana De Weapons

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There were good times too

>>84290084
illiterate bitch

>>84290194
I don't think she personally wrote it, anon.

>>84289650
She's married to Eli Roth, anon.

>>84290229
That one isn't

>>84289749
>Ana De Weapons
cute

This was painful to watch

>>84288265
A truly awful movie with some grade A qts

Would you fuck down free turning pizza?

>>84288471
this. i never answer the door unless i'm expecting someone

>implying I would even open the door
>implying I wouldn't have a panick attack in this situation
>implying I use facebook

>>84288371
I live in Jew York so I'd know these people would be trying to rob and/or kill me if this happened

>>84289435
Heavenly

>>84288265
hell no

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as soon as they would try to start seducing my obese ass i would be skeptical as to their true intentions, not to mention far too uncomfortable to try and actually sex them

>>84288371
I've seen enough true crime shows to suspect that something's up. No way would 2 attractive girls be in the rain in the middle of nowhere and without a means of transportation or working cellphone. It's obviously a set-up where those 2 are going to knock me out and have their partners rob the place and possibly kill me.

>>84292453
This. Entire movie reminds me of a capitalist scam

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>>84292311

>>84292311
>/tv/

>>84292394
this pic alway scrack sme the FUCK up

I COULD GO DEAF I COULD GO DEAF SERIOUSLY I COULD GO DEAF

>>84288371
i want to punch the chick on the right
i bet she's just as smug as the one on the left but extra salty because she doesn't get to be the bombshell

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>mfw they start fucking with his wife's "art"

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>>84292548
>capitalist scam
spotted the edgelord

I wonder if Keanu and Eli were tag teaming those bitches for the duration of shooting

the movie was kind of a rip off of funny games where there is no happy ending... I wanted keanu to kill them somehow, or get them jailed for blackmail

>>84289381

brunette and blonde imply genetics
yellow and brown/black are but only colors

>>84289513
no way
i don't think she looks dumb but that's simply because i've had my expectations turned on me several times

>>84294753
thats some hardcore autism

>>84292394
what if you lived in a world where obese people were considered attractive

>>84294803
>language is autism

Guess how I know you know you're wrong

>>84288599
underrated Carlposting

>>84294732
It is a remake of Death Game. I don't know why they changed the name.

>implying i would ever make enough money to have a big house isolated from my neighbors

>>84288265
I would if there was pineapple on it.

>>84288371
I'd let the blonde in, the thing on the right can die out there.

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>>84288471
This

>>84294848
then i would be getting sniz on the reg already, wouldn't i?

also then the ladies at my front door would also be obese, wouldn't they?

>>84295088
>also then the ladies at my front door would also be obese

FUCKING LOL
CONSERVATION OF FAT LAWS

im so bad with women i would still fuck it up

>>84289469
thats the perfect combination

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>>84289469
>dumb as fuck
>still cant convince her to giv le succ

Funniest stuff ever
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KpMvDC7UYfQ

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>>84294971
>>84288471
>>84288599
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ug1gAS9-Mn0

>>84295443
I legit think it is oscar worthy. Seems like exactly how someone would act in this situation.

>>84295443
Incredible

Happy to see Eli Roth kino thread on /tv/