Meg (2018)

>>83860432
This shit sounds gangsta as fuck

>>83860432
Wasn't Jason Statham already in a big shark movie? Like, a flooded mall or some shit?

>>83860432
Why do redditors like OP shill "epic" bad movies like this, sharknado, birdemic, the room, etc?

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Meg_(film)

>Jason Statham had signed on to star in the film as a former Naval captain and expert diver who is recruited to undertake a deep-sea mission to rescue Chinese scientists under attack from the 70-foot white shark, named Carcharodon Megalodon.
>Meg's theatrical premiere will be in China in February 2018.
>Also starring Li Bingbing

Ah, it's one of those China-pandering movies. This should be fun.

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>Meg descends on the last few survivors, assured of victory
>suddenly, a lone figure steps out of the shadows
>it's Seth MacFarlane
>he stares ominously at the rampaging shark travelling at high speed
>the camera zooms in slowly, focused on Seth's grim face
>he whispers, "shut up, Meg."
>Inception theme
>veins start to appear all over the shark's face, pulsating and popping, as it roars incoherently despite the fact that sharks can't roar because they're fucking sharks
>the remaining survivors find a place to dive out of the way
>Meg explodes into precisely one billion pieces
>cut to NASA ground control as everyone there takes off their headpiece and cheers and claps because America
>Anthony Jeselnik declares another "shark party"

And all was well.

>>83860600
>and expert driver
Of course.

>>83860600
In the movie's defense the novel had a Japanese leading lady, but China's got the beaucoup bucks so fuck the nips

>>83860432
i bet jason is going to have a chain and somehow avoid the shark and wrap the chain/or shark will bite down on chain so as to have jason on top of the shark while holding on to the ends of the chain (like riding a horse)

then thunderous sound of 'here i am, rock you like a hurricane' plays underwater as he steers 'meg' away from one of the chinese research teams little daughter that somehow fell and into the water.

someone cap this
this will be in the movie
i promise

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What are some actual giant animal kinos?

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>>83861976

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Damn I have the book that said it was going to be a major motion picture in 2008. Can't. Eli eve it took this long either:

>the rights getting resolved

>studios stopped fucking around

Call me a shill now but I've been waiting for this moment for a while now and I cannot wait to be disappointed

>>83862470
is the book even any good?

>>83860499
It was called
BIG SHARK
MALL CARP

>>83861976
Lake Placid

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>>83860432

>never been a bookfag complaining on /tv/
>read meg years ago
>see how they've literally the premise until its unrecognizable

The book is literally better. Jesus fuck, I'll just watch the latest Sharknado instead.

>>83860432
>ruby rose

They are seriously shoving this bitch into every other movie released, just like Kevin Hart last year.

>>83860432
Shut up meg.

>>83862889
it always ends in 2-3 years. just look at Jennifer Lawrence.

animal kino? sir i believe the term is creature feature

>>83860432
Is a there a significant terror multiplier in having the shark be fifty feet longer? At a certain point don't you get diminishing returns?

>>83860432
>70 foot giant shark.
Nobody?
Really?
OK then
THAT'S A BIG SHARK

>>83863678
Fine
For Ruby Rose

>>83863210
nah

>>83863678
IM A SHARRK
SUUUUCK MY DIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIICK

Can't the navy just fire missiles at it at that size

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>>83863210

Been a while since I read the books but in one of the sequels the sharks kid attacks a baseball stadium near the shore and is eating people like popcorn.

Diminishing returns and sharks should never be used in the same sentence.

>>83865909
That would be a big problem

>>83860432
Shut up Meg

So the shark is named Meg? or....

>>83860432
>literally been waiting over a decade for this movie to be made
>know for a fact its gonna be shit
fml

>>83865753
Hecka f***** epic

>>83860432
>shark with only one head

>>83866933
I know, and it doesn't even have any tentacles, or live in a tornado or anything. Seems to me like these movies are regressing.

>>83860432
Shut
Up
Meg

this book was awful to to point i didn't even like it when i was retarded 16 year old who just wanted to read about some fuckhuge shark eating people

>>83862611
No it's awful but I remember reading it as a kid way back in 1997.

>>83867442
>>83867425
doesn't the book start with a megalodon eating a t-rex during the cretaceous period? i'll be disappointed if they don't put that in

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8raLJHzWqVA

>>83860432
>Ruby Rose
Yeah, I think I'll give it a miss.

>Jason Statham vs Giant Shark

fuck yeah I'm down


>ruby rose

ugh why the fuck is she in everything now

>>83860432
This movie should have been made like 10 years ago.
I'm not interested anymore.

>>83860731
Do the Chinese really want to a see a movie that presumably stars one of their own getting BONGED by Jason Statham? I thought they hated that crap. Wouldn't they rather some buff Chinese Olympic Diver?

>>83868996

Chinks are self-hating and love american movie stars. Mao's rolling in his grave.

>>83868996
we literally just had a Kong movie where they shoehorned in a Chinese female scientist who got BLACKED

chinks are cucks

>>83869168
>chinks are cucks
Chucks

>>83861976
The Host

>>83860638
Underrated

>>83860499
No, that was Jawmart

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>>83861976
this desu senpai

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>>83867627
>dat music
>David Attenborough British American documentary comparrison meme intensifies

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First production still was released

>>83860432

It's like a high budget Sifi channel original movie.

This board has turned into utter shit. I am fucking done

>>83860432
>Ruby Rose was cast as Jaxx, a kick-ass engineering genius and the member of the marine research team.

INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO NEEDS NO MAN

>>83870774

Seeya tomorrow

>>83860628
Wow the summer meme is real this is Reddit as fuck

>>83870593
Lost

>>83870871
>the_______ is real.

Sure is.

>>83870774
Agreed if dubs i leave for good

>>83860628

fucking kill yourself