why do you guys hate attack of the clones?

>>83842537
I DONT LIKE SAND

>>83842674
>I DON'T LIKE SANDNIGGERS

I really wish Lucas had kept the original version

>>83842537
Because i've seen it

I liked it because the music, costumes, set pieces, and Obi-wan

AOTC is pretty good, never got the hate for it.

The whole Geonosis arena scene is GOAT.

I actually really like Detective Obi-Wan and wish it had been more of the movie.

I hated all the Anakin and Padme scenes.

>>83842537
Because it's a bad movie

>>83842537
That famous "look out for that bounty hunter" goodfriend post explains why it's ridiculously bad pretty well.

It's actually my favorite SW movie

AoTC is unironically more creative than anything Disney has done.

>>83842537
It was a very good story, executed in a very poor way.

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>>83843717
>"Watch out for that vicious bounty hunter Boba Fett, Luke. Did I ever tell you I fought his dad? He was hired to assassinate a senator me and your father were guarding. We kept bringing her around open windows and public areas in order to draw the would-be assassin out because we knew he had too much pride to just shoot her from long range. He had used his payment to hire another bounty hunter to kill the senator for him while he sent us on a wild bantha chase. Also the 2nd assassin used her payment to buy a robot to assassinate the senator for her. Did I mention the 2nd assassin was a shapeshifter? She could have been a good friend in disguise and just shot the senator for all we knew! Then the robot used its payment to buy poisonous bugs to release into the senator's room while she slept after lasering a hole through the window. It could have just lasered her too after that because we we weren't watching her at all, but it already bought the bugs. So we sense the hostile life forms (not the robot) in the room and rush in and save the senator in the nick of time! Then I jumped out the window to chase the robot back to its owner! Luckily it didn't have a self-destruct function. Then we found the 2nd assassin and chased her across the planet, and caught her when she tried to kill us instead of shapeshifting and escaping. But to our surprise, Jango Fett was watching the whole thing instead of going to kill the senator while we were away chasing the bugs chasing the robot chasing the shapeshifter. He shot her with a poisonous dart instead of sniper blaster, and only her instead of shooting all of us or blowing all of us with a rocket or something, then he escaped with his tiny jetpack. Luckily for the senator, my good friend Dexterr Jettster owned a 50s dinner on Courscant that had Republic secrets on the menu along with cheeseburgers and malt shakes. We found the assassin and Mace Window killed him later, right in front of Boba. And he was a good friend."

I don't remember a single thing that happened in this movie except that it introduced Dooku and there was some kind of alien bug gladiator arena in the middle.

I remember tons of plot from Menace, tons of plot from Revenge, but Attack of the Clones just feels like a blur. What the fuck even happened in this movie?

>>83842537
I like it because Natalie, but it's the weakest of star wars, even the new ones

>>83844010
Someone's trying to kill Padme. Obi tracks them down and learns about the clones. Anakin and Padme go on a date and he gets a dream about his mommy and goes home to find she's married and also dead and killed a bunch of sandpeople. Then they all meet up on the bug planet.

>>83842537
the title makes no god damned sense
>clones are good guys
>dont feature in film until last half
>hidden clone army sub-plot makes no god damned sense, uneedingly nefarious
>rest of the film is romance and sand

>>83842537
It had too much of Anakin x Padme romance and next to none of Anakin x Obi-Wan bromance.

I don't. I don't even remember it.

I do dislike RotS a lot, however. It has no business being so highly-rated as it is.

>>83843717
You can trivialize anything that way, it's not very fair

>>83843524
Everything with Padme, Anakin, and the droids was so unredeemably cringey.

Obi-wan was good in every scene, as well as Mace Windu believe it or not.

SFX and Music were top notch for the most part, as usual.

Action in the arena scene and count dooku/yoda were cheesy and cartoonish as shit.

Also I didn't like the bounty hunter chase in the beginning. But it was pretty cool when Obi-wan jumped through that window out of nowhere, even if it was also dumb.

Yeah the movie basically blows cock and is by far the worst Star Wars.

>>83843961
the best part is how the robot used his payment to buy some bugs. I will never not think that absolutely hilarious

As a movie, it's kind of pointless because almost nothing actually happens. For some reason, Lucas decided to make this movie about Anakin and Padme falling in love, and he did shit job of writing that. Almost everything else in the movie is just filler. Detective Obi-wan is interesting, but it doesn't lead anywhere, as Obi-wan doesn't actually solve his case; the movie ends up bringing up even more plot points that are never resolved. In terms of overall lore, it pissed off a lot of people by completely going against all previous notions (even those coming from Lucas) of what the Clone Wars had been about, or who the clones were.

So, it's a movie about a badly written love story that brings up a lot of unresolved plot points and only barely sets up what was supposed to be the biggest even of the prequels. It's light on actual plot, and feels like a waste of time, which Lucas even admitted to later when he said he regretted leaving almost all of the plot of the prequels until the third movie.

>>83842537
shit romance

>>83842537
Jango Fett was a really stupid character idea.

>>83842537

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KPt1am18lR4

>>83845942

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nq3Wlk2w-Zw

>>83842537
because it's bad

>>83846011

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RqYx0cqy0WA

Because it's really shitty. The best thing about it was the geonosian war which is better portrayed on every other shit.

>>83842537
AROUND THE SURVIVORS A PERIMETER CREATE

>>83842537
Because of what the other posts mentioned plus this: "Stormtroopers...I am your Father." - Boba Fett.

The Anakin and Padme scenes were annoying.
It's still way better than TFA, anyone disagreeing has shit taste, sorry.

>>83843961
Copy pasta kino

>>83847645
How in the fuck can you think Anakin and Padme is better than TFA in any possible way? Those scenes are the lowpoints of the entire series.

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>>83844767
>...is far the worst Star Wars

Let me introduce you to the disney abominations The Force Awakens and Rogue One...

>>83842537
Besides the ending of III, I think II is a better movie.
The Jedi Council are all acting stupid saying you can't go on instinct, but Obi-Wan goes around the galaxy getting shit done.
The Anakin and Padme romance scenes weren't great but I loved how Obi-Wan took initiative to figure out what was going on.

>i dont like niggers
>they're ugly, they dont work, and they commit violent crime

what did Lucas mean by this?

>>83847645
Nice bait

>>83843961
Now that's a pasta I've not seen in a long long time

>>83844154
Back when the title was announced there was an absolute shitstorm over how cheesy it sounded ,It's just a throwback to Flash Gordon stuff like Empire Strikes Back

>>83844767
>Also I didn't like the bounty hunter chase in the beginning
Fucking hell that scene goes on FOREVER

>>83845142
>he regretted leaving almost all of the plot of the prequels until the third movie
>Episode 1 could have opened in media res with Anakin already Obi Wan's apprentice at the beginning of The Clone Wars
Why didn't he just do this?

>>83842674
this is literally a reddit tier post, you should feel ashamed of yourself

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>>83848204
>prequel autists still pretend that TFA and R1 are anywhere near as bad as even the best prequel
embarrassing desu

>>83842537
it's boring as fuck

>>83843961
>Also the 2nd assassin used her payment to buy a robot to assassinate the senator for her. Did I mention the 2nd assassin was a shapeshifter? She could have been a good friend in disguise and just shot the senator for all we knew! Then the robot used its payment to buy poisonous bugs to release into the senator's room while she slept after lasering a hole through the window. It could have just lasered her too after that because we we weren't watching her at all, but it already bought the bugs.
literally zero indication that she doesn't already own the robot and bugs and used her payment on these things

It's unironically the best of the prequels. It has the best story and the best tonal balance.

>>83843961
>powerful Sith Lord hires an expert bounty hunter
>expert bounty hunter hires an assassin shapeshifter
>assassin shapeshifter hires a probe
>probe hires insects
this really is shitty
the shapeshifteing assassin was a wasted opportunity if there ever was one

>>83850520
The whole thing is a cheesy throwback, but unless a film is constantly winking at the audience like Spiderman, audiences respond poorly to such things.

> Anakin said what?!
> missing the point.

>>83851056
It served its purpose by making the bar scene more intense, but yes, it certainly could've been better executed, but at the end of the day, there was far more artistry put into this film than any current Star Wars film.

>>83842537
I like it though... I like all the prequels

The prequels were much better written, they had actual characters and story, not a bunch of memes and one-liners that lack any emotion or coherence. Luke is a cliched everyboy "hero" that goes through an absurdly rapid transformation between the fifth and the sixth episodes. Anakin's emotional instability and his exposure as a psychopath are gripping; and his doomed relationship with Padme is touching. In the compromised and boring "original trilogy" Han, Leia, Darth Vader and Obi Wan are complete meme characters, nothing about them is remotely believable or human. And why doesn't anyone care about deaths in those movies? Leia's planet destruction, Luke's stepparents' death, all of the blown up rebels--the list could go on--all the deaths are forgotten moments later.

As for direction, the movies from the "original trilogy" were mostly incoherent, badly edited and full of logical problems. The prequel trilogy is a work of a "vulgar auteur".

J. J. Abrams is a postmodernist with an eye for dense compositions and an autist (much like Lucas) who was a bad choice for a supposedly "charming" and "humorous" reunion movie--the only interesting character is the autistic Kylo Ren (the autistic Spock from "Star Trek" is the only interesting character there too), and overall lack of human "charm" emphasizes logical problems.

I feel neutral about the series overall, and honestly don't care about trolling or contrarianism. Here are my sincere rankings:

1. "Star Wars Episode II: Attack of the Clones"
2. "Star Wars Episode I: The Phantom Menace"
3. "Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Sith"
4. "Star Wars"
5. "The Empire Strikes Back"
6. "Return of the Jedi"
7. "Star Wars: The Force Awakens"

>>83852859
This.

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Ever since I was a kid, one aspect of Star Wars I always wanted to see was the Jedi being badasses, since there was so much mythology behind them that we only got a little bit of a taste of with Luke. I wanted to see what Obi Wan was talking about how there were all these Jedi that were the keepers of the peace for millions of generations.

Then I saw the arena battle scene and realized how stupid I was.

But I don't

I've never understood how so many people hate Episode I over this.

Episode I has some enjoyable moments. This movie is simply trash.

Begun the shilling for a bad movie has

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iBpdKkbvrko

These cool video was made of it.

>>83842734
It was a different time

>>83842537
The Obi Wan parts were good but the Anakin parts were bad. I think people hate the prequels because they fucked up Anakin's character.

>>83851008
>>literally zero indication that she doesn't already own the robot and bugs and used her payment on these things
>it's an underage autist tries to argue with pasta episode

>Hey Obi Wan remember when I saved you from Gundarks
>Obi Wan is like a father to me
>Lucas: At it's core Star Wars is about Father and Son
Why didn't he show more of Obi Wan and Anakin doing shit together. TCW show sort of made up for it but Anakin's padawan was annoying

>>83854132
>Why didn't he show more of Obi Wan and Anakin doing shit together.
Lucas is retarded. The only reason Obi Wan managed to maintain a huge presence in the OT was because Vader kept mentioning Obi Wan every time he appeared along with the fact that he was still around.
>Obi Wan once thought as you do
That fucking hack thought people would rather see some lame romance after lines like this. Obi Wan and Anakin had a huge history but all we got were throwaway lines of Anakin reminding Obi Wan that he saved him

>>83843335
That is the only watchable part of that movie, nearly ruined by the droid factory scene and R2s sudden rocket legs. Not to mention how absolutely fucking terrible the CGI was for 3PO in that scene.
Honestly the CGI for that seemed to be worse than TPM and George decided to follow what the cool directors were doing at the time and included fucking shakey cam into the battle at the end.
Also, I hate sand.

>>83850588
>OT Obi Wan when first talking about Anakin
He was a good friend
>PT Obi Wan when first talking about Anakin
Why do I get a feeling we've picked up another pathetic life form

Bravo Lucas. It's obvious that Qui Gon took Obi Wan's place while Obi wan took Anakin's place.

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>fat, old loser looks back through his rose tinted glasses at the OT

AOTC is objectively better than the OT and the sequels. Ewoks? Really?

>>83853760
So this is why the Techno Union was brought into the CIS

>>83842537
Well there is just the general hate for the prequels. But then there is the specific hate for the "romantic" scenes on Naboo. Cheesy as fuck acting, rolling around in the grass, picking flowers, dinner by candlelight. It was just a very very bad piece of cinema. The spaceships and all the other shit was super cool though, but that shit on Naboo.....................

>>83842537
George can't write dialogue for shit. When the majority of the film is about Padme and Anakin talking through their feelings for one another this causes some problems.

Hayden Christiansen looking constipated for the entire film is pretty bad too.

McGreggor, MacDairmid, Sam Jackson, and Christopher Lee are the best executed parts of the film.

Very cool to see Obi-wan solving mysteries but what the fuck was up with that greasy diner alien??? Why does a "diner" in space look like something out of the 50's?

Yoda fight was a little silly with the jumping but it does make sense that someone of his affinity with the force would use his powers to help him fight and make up for his stature.

The idea of a clone army was cool but the Fett connection felt forced, George just wanted to make toys.

Tbh, if it wasn't for the absolutely TRASH dialogue and with a little less of Anakin/Padme scenes it would be a pretty dope science fantasy film.

>>83853622
>VOY than TAS
Nigga is this bait?

>>83842537
I could never understand why people say this is worse than TPM

Can anyone help me out with this?

I don't like it because Jango Fett gets his ass waxed by Mace Windu and we never really got to see him do any cool shit.

Just like how Boba gets his ass waxed by Luke in VI.

It just seemed so unrealistic how quickly they went down. I thought mandalorians were a warrior race. I thought back when count dooku was a jedi, jango fett made a stand on galidraan with other mandalorians and jango was killing jedi left and right.

Why can't we see bounty hunters do dope shit?

Is this just going to get another one of those bullshit "hurrrr non-canon !!!!" responses? Probably.

>>83855184
People on this site get assmad when they have to sit through Padme and Anakin scenes because they missed out on young love

>>83855497
>Reddit spacing
>dope shit
>liking mandalorians
checks out

>>83855184
Because for whatever reason people can't look past the dialogue and digital filmography to realize it has a superior story and superior characters who are actually fleshed out. If they could, they'd realize the film is a lot more fun and more true to the overall spirit of Star Wars.

>>83854456
>Why do I get a feeling we've picked up another pathetic life form
fucking hell raimi

>>83854706
awww you poor thing, nobody took your bait. Here's a (you) it'll get you through the night

test

>>83855497

>Mace Dindu
lmao XD

>>83854000
not an argument

>>83855539
I meant just in the general public. Most people will say AOTC when you ask what the worst Star Wars is.

>>83842537
the love part takes way too much time for how badly written it is, half the movie looks like an old videogame, meaningless action with no impact. it just feels like a low budget tv show

>>83855539
I dind't and it's nothing like in the movie

>>83855925
That's because they're idiots who can't grasp the genre, and would rather have a film with recycled plots and reddit tier comedy.

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>>83842537
It's my favorite of the prequels. To me it's a nice little hero's journey. Anakin's mission is to protect Padme. He gets the girl. Great wide shots. Great soundtrack. Dooku is a pretty cool villain. It's the movie where we finally get to see what Anakin was like when he meant well as a Jedi. I just prefer it over Revenge of the Sith. I really like the bounty hunter aspects as well. To me the movie is the epitome of what Lucas was going for. A nice 40s/50s feel. Casablanca style in a way. I don't mind the 50s Diner and I don't mind the romance. Yes I think the OT is better, but the prequels I love as well.

>>83856071
TPM is too childish and ROTS is too depressing. AOTC is juuuusssst riiiiiight.

>>83850588
According to him, he thought it was necessary to push the story back to Anakin's childhood so he could show just how dramatic his fall was. Which is a pretty dumb reason that probably wasn't very well thought out. The same thing could have been achieved better by having an adult Anakin be a likable character.

>>83856171
He had Anakin as a 10 year old because he thought that would appeal to 10 year olds

>>83856374
Yeah it worked for me. I was 10 when it came out. Then being a 13 year old with raging hormones Padme in episode 2 worked for me. Then being an edgy 16 year old, Anakin episode 3 becoming Vader resonated with me. Lucas is a genius wtf.

What proves that Clones was a success is that we're still talking about it 15 years after it was released. Something you won't be able to say about Disney Wars.

>>83856501
>people remember Water World and Battlefield Earth that means they were successful films

>>83856501
yeah right. The kids watching it will grow up loving it like the prequels. Also I think the sequels are going to end up being better than the prequels so I'll be talking about it.

>>83842537
what's going on with anakin's hair?

>>83856657
It's a padawan thing because that's what Obi-Wan has in episode 1.

>>83843938
It had a story?

>>83856584
It's better to be infamous and entertaining than to be generic and forgettable.

>>83856753
More so than TPM and TFA.

>>83856789
Nothing about this movie is generic and forgettable. Like it or not, people will never forget scenes from the movie. People will never forget Yoda doing backflips and Anakin busting a nut in his pants talking about Sand.

>>83844010
I remember the obi wan vs. jango star fighter duel.
Those sonic mines man, that whole scene was probably the second best space battle in the whole series

>>83842537
>that scene where he goes from emo teen to literal unironic genocide in mere seconds
>that scene after it where he tells natalie portman about his literal unironic genocide and she says "it's okay ani, you were just angry because your mom died" and then proceeds to make multiple babies with him

>>83856834
>Yoda doing backflips
thousands of man hours had to go into that, fucking hell

>>83856834
I was talking about TFA and most modern popcorn flicks.

>>83856873
His mom was raped and murdered by space muslims. I would cut the guy so slack too.

>>83856171
We didn't need it anyway; the original movies did a good enough job conveying the tragedy of Vader's character.

>>83856873
>murders women and children
>still light side

It's like I'm playing KOTOR

>>83857283
And that's a bad thing?

>>83857615
Yes, video game logic in movies is a bad thing.

>>83857840
They raped and murdered his mom. It wasn't even an isolated incident. They have a history of similar atrocities. From a certain point of view what Anakin did was heroic.

>>83858110
The children didn't rape anyone.

>>83856873
pure kino

Because Count Dooku hires Jango Fett to kill Padme but Jango Fett hires Zam Wessell to kill Padme who uses a robot who uses poisonous centipedes when Jango could have just fired a rocket launcher at her window

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>>83842537
>oh ahnahkin

>>83858396
Why would Dooku want her dead?

>>83858533
She was the Senator that was leading the party of Senators that was against the Military Creation Act and Dooku was working for Sidious who wanted the Clone Army to be authorized so they could start a civil war and lead to the build-up of a military-industrial complex that would eventually form the Empire

>>83843961
ayyy

>>83858598
But didn't Dooku want his army to win?
And then he got tricked by Palpatine or something later?

>>83850728
/tv/ already agrees that TFA is the worst in the series.

>>83858725
Count Dooku was pretending to support the Confederacy they were never meant to win only pave the way for a military build-up in the Core Worlds

In the original EU Palpatine took advantage of the Core Worlds xenophobia towards the Outer Rim and got them to support him when Order 66 happened, a lot of these planets became the backbone of the Imperial Navy

>>83858828
So why did he lead an army to lose so he gets executed later?

non-kenobi scenes are boring
cgi shitfest overall

>>83858860
I assume Count Dooku thought when Palpatine was Emperor he would be pardoned or some bullshit.

In the old EU Palpatine was aware Plageuis created Anakin through midi-chlorian experiments or some bullshit so he was just using Dooku until he took him as an apprentice

>>83858989
So basically he was an idiot.

>>83859043
Yeah you could say that.

The prequels are pretty stupid but I love the lore in that period of the saga

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>>83842537
i still have the DVD

>>83843961
people don't understand just how powerful Anakin and Obi were. They were the Elite of the Elite. They were Star Destroyers in human form. To actually oppose them is certain death.

the assassins had to use the most convoluted, most kid gloves plot they could think of because if they tried any direct assassination method they'd either be killed or captured before they even knew what happened.

>>83855891
Because nobody feels like you debating you on the content of a pasta written using slight hyperbole to be humourous you autist.

>>83858163
The children grow up.

>>83859781
You can kill them then

>>83859847
Anakin's on the clock man, he's got more than one genocide to get to today.

>>83859847
So they have to grow up and terrorize the people of Tatooine, before you can intervene? Such moronic logic.

Also by killing the Tusken children it makes it easier for him to transition into killing the younglings. And not to mention the whole Tusken genocide is an ingenious way to plant the dark side seed in Anakin. He promises his mom he won't fail again, and when death starts knocking on Padme's door he's willing to up the stakes to protect her at all costs. The whole thing is just absolutely brilliant.

>>83859991
Tusken Raiders are just defending their native land from dirty immigrants stealing their sacred water.

>>83860119
Whatever EU cuck.

>>83858788
Who is /tv/?

>>83855820
>>83855184
Thanks for this. I thought something was wrong with me.

>>83852859
I agree with most of what you said, but i'm not sure i agree with your rankings. Revenge of the Sith, I feel, has far better direction, both technically and plot-wise. additionally, anakin's characterization is almost entirely developed in Revenge, the only truly developing moment for him in Attack is his massacre of the sand people. there is also, i think, absolutely nothing legitimate/well-made in Phantom Menace, whereas on a functional level, when looking at the film independently, Empire Strikes Back is far more successful in characterization and technical skills than any non Revenge film. i think, using your train of thought, a more accurate list would be

1. Revenge of the Sith
2. Empire Strikes Back
3. Attack of the Clones
4. Phantom Menace
5. A New Hope
6. Return of the Jedi
7. The Force Awakens

(Rogue One is in an entire league of its own, far worse than even The Force Awakens)

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>>83853622
>cowboy bebop worse than DSN and TNG

>>83860119
It's not "their" water.

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>>83853622

>>83859043
Pretty much. He forgot the part of being a Sith that involves betrayal.

>>83843961
Zam was great and shouldn't have died so quickly. A shapeshifting bounty hunter who's actually a disgusting alien monster but prefers to be a qt human was a funny concept.

>>83842537
Boring romance. The assassination plot makes no sense with a bounty hunter directly hiring an assassin to do his job. Boba is annoying. Boring final fight between two armies we don't care anything about and running on PS2-era graphics. The utterly botched attempt at a fakeout with Dooku, the most obvious villain ever. Anakin being a whiney psychopath, and so on.

>>83842537
It's the best one of the three, but it's also the worst because they shouldn't fucking learned after Phantom Menace. Instead they casted charisma vacuums and Mcgregor couldn't carry the entire film

>>83865208
Should've*

>>83863162
Is The Clone Wars honestly good, or is it "good" for a kid's cartoon show?
Always found it funny that Star Wars lore was almost always better than the real thing.

>>83853622
>space shows
>not all garbage tier or worse

>>83853622
>any star trek
>higher than both B5 and Farscape
also
>voyager on par with red dwarf
red dwarf is mainly a sitcom but sci-fi parts of it are much more enjoyable than voyager's

>>83853618
Probably has to do with the hype leading up to the TPM, people were really excited and expected it to be more like the OT. Also Jar Jar.

>>83850595
This is literally like, omg i can't even baka..

Attack of the Clones is the worst in the entire franchise, and you are absolutely mentally challenged for liking it

>Unimmersive, boring and antiemotional speedchaser scene which doesn't fit in
>CGI gladiator scene where the actors just unchoreographically waved sticks around and CGI was just mirrored to whatever occurring motion
>One of, if not the very worst romantic charisma to ever be portrayed in a high-budget movie
>Entry-level written bad guys who serves no other meaning than being a bad guy
>Some of the CGI is just garbage, constantly reminding you that you are literally wasting your time
>Boring, predictable and seemingly random/unexplained factory scene
>Cringe-worthy dialogue

It's a mess of a movie which doesn't know which direction it wants to go
It was at first supposed to be for children
After the backlash from Phantom Menace, they decided to touch bigger emotions with the romance, but it just has no place in the movie

I whole-heartedly swear you'd have to be a 70-IQ down-syndrome neckbeard to even slightly appreciate this piece of filth

>>83842537
I don't.

It's my favourite Star War.

Reread the thread that made /tv/ great again

https://archive.4plebs.org/tv/thread/83851903