Whoa! Like, this was too epic for words!

>>83714804
this always irritated me. so he took his name, spelled out I AM LORD and then decided on Voldemort with the rest of the letters?

>>83714959
the "I am" part always triggered me

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More like lord dullest franchise in the history of movie franchises! LOL Seriously each episode following the boy wizard and his pals from Hogwarts Academy as they fight assorted villains has been indistinguishable from the others. Aside from the gloomy imagery, the series’ only consistency has been its lack of excitement and ineffective use of special effects, all to make magic unmagical, to make action seem inert.

Perhaps the die was cast when Rowling vetoed the idea of Spielberg directing the series; she made sure the series would never be mistaken for a work of art that meant anything to anybody, just ridiculously profitable cross-promotion for her books. The Harry Potter series might be anti-Christian (or not), but it’s certainly the anti-James Bond series in its refusal of wonder, beauty and excitement. No one wants to face that fact. Now, thankfully, they no longer have to.

>a-at least the books were good though
"No!"
The writing is dreadful; the book was terrible. As I read, I noticed that every time a character went for a walk, the author wrote instead that the character "stretched his legs."

I began marking on the back of an envelope every time that phrase was repeated. I stopped only after I had marked the envelope several dozen times. I was incredulous. Rowling's mind is so governed by cliches and dead metaphors that she has no other style of writing. Later I read a lavish, loving review of Harry Potter by the same Stephen King. He wrote something to the effect of, "If these kids are reading Harry Potter at 11 or 12, then when they get older they will go on to read Stephen King." And he was quite right. He was not being ironic. When you read "Harry Potter" you are, in fact, trained to read Stephen King.

I really don't get this. He changed his name because he hated sharing the name of his muggle father, but he fucking kept all the letters to form an anagram?

>>83714959
>>83715111
"Voldemort" means "death flight" fyi.

Literally, "I am Lord Death Flight".

As in a literal, autistic, fedora wearing, edgy, school shooter, magic user name.

>>83715116
To be fair, that's kind of what he was. He even lost because 'he didn't know love' AKA permavirgin status compared to Chaddy Potter.

>>83715178
>>83715116
Can you imagine what that shit would be like irl?

Some really creepy old guy keeps terrorizing your high school because he couldn't get a gf. Kills your parents. Declares death to all alumni not on his side. That's cringe as shit.

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>>83715239

>>83714959
ITT:
We come up with a better anagram from
TOM MARVOLO RIDDLE.

>I AM OLD ROD LOVER (TM)

>>83714804
Eh, it's epic, but I wouldn't call it for the win.

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>>83715239
Just watch how he hugs.
He is literally a hugless virgin.

>>83715302
Holy fucking shit, I'm dying

>>83715302
RAID MOLOTOV REALM D

>>83715302

MR EVIL MORTAL DOOD

>>83715302
OL MOVE DILDO MART

>>83715239
>>83715486
Voldemort was literally a chad at hogwarts though. He was bullying /r9k/ losers like hagrid and put all the blame on him while he was killing mudblood stacies for laughs.

Honestly, he might be /ourwizard/.

>>83715302
LEMAR MOOT DILDO VR

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>this guy
>virgin

epic tumblredditors
epic

>>83715302

LMAO DRIVEL DR MOOT

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>>83716443
>>83716597
>this guy
>virgin

>>83715302
makes sense because of the elder wand
HARRY POTTER TRULY HAS THE DEEPEST LORE

>>83715302
REDDIT LOL VROOMA

>>83716700
not even in the same league

>>83716700
god autistic hapas are cancer

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>>83716773
>VROOMA

>>83715302
DR VOMIT DROOL (MALE)

>>83715101
Damn not a single relpy. /tv/ is dead.

>>83717427
That pasta was stale when it wasn't pasta. Let it go.

>>83715302
MALT OR MOM DIDDLER V

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>>83714804

>voldemort
>vol de mort
>mouse the dead
>deadmouse

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You guys ready for the origin story?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mPMgJJ0VBnI

>>83718224

I imagine it was just taken from the German word for genocide, Volkermord. Bitch sat there thinking of a name for the big bad and the 6 gorillion was her decision.

>>83719087
>Fan film

Oh boy here we go

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>>83715239
The entire series was about two betas who went to Hogwarts long before the eponymous character and the two very different beta paths they took. One where developed oneitis for a girl at school and beta orbited her while she dated and married the Chad who bullies him. Later she squeezes out Chad's son before they killed by the other beta. As it turns out, his oneitis was so bad that he couldn't de-orbit himself even when his planet exploded, so he ends up dedicating his life to protecting his crush's son, Chad Junior, simultaneously resenting himself and the boy for it.

The other beta, as you said, is a total social reject and destroys Cho's record at Virginia Tech during the climactic final scene.

>>83719087
>>83719299

I swear to god if they make him gay i'll...not be ok with it

>>83719601
only a woman could write a character like snape. she makes him a perpetual cuck his entire life and then has him brutally murdered, yet still presents it like he served some sort of honorable purpose, when really his life was miserable, sad and unfulfilling. his whole purpose was to get bullied, cucked then protect the son of the man who ruined his childhood and get absolutely nothing in return.

his dying words were noticing how his rivals son had the same eyes as the woman he loved. one last salt in the wound before he bled out.

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>>83716297
Holy kek

>>83715302
this is hilarious. "Marvolo" has to be the most shoehorned and retarded sounding name ever. It's so fucking forced and was made up just for the cringey reveal of "I am Lord Voldemort"

>>83719960
And it's not enough for his name to spell "Voldemort", it's full on "I am Lord Voldemort".

Like Tom Riddle was sitting there with the first three words figured out and smashed the rest together.

>>83719601
>Slutty chav Stacey writes an entire series dedicated to shitting on lonely men who can't get laid and makes billions off of it
REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAD better books, seriously.

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>>83715116
>>83715302

>>83719871
was he thinking about how perfect of a trap Harry would be for him?

>>83719960
Even better, to make this work in French, they had to change his midle name to 'Elvis'

>>83715302
DR PAVEL IM CIA

whoaaa

>>83720136
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NIgfiSzCy1o

>>83714804
Someone explain what's happening here

>>83720236
holy shit I never thought about that

just looked it up, a lot of them are really bad

http://harrypotter.wikia.com/wiki/List_of_characters_in_translations_of_Harry_Potter#Tom_Marvolo_Riddle

>Tom Mersvoluko Riddal
>Tom Dredolo Venster
>Tom Evildo Reger
>Trevor Delgome
>Romeo G. Detlev Jr

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>>83720440

>Tom Evildo Reger
>fucking EVILDO

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>>83715302
DR DOLITLE ROAM

>>83719177
Voldy is literally magic hitler.