Have you tried standup? Didn't all your friends in highschool

>>83696242
>>83696242
>friends in highschool
YOU'RE the funny guy Anon

>>83696242
Too hard.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=McFzWzwtmmU

>>83697041
I hope she learned women are as funny as they'll ever be when being used as urinals

>>83697727
Thanks for the insight, sweetie.

>>83697041
Who told her ventriloquism was funny? Was this a fucking church talent show?

>>83697041
lmao

>>83696242
Tfw you realize they were ripping on Amy by having Dee act like that the whole episode

Based Sunny

which one of you was this?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qi8Ainwn6K8

>doing standup for a few weeks
>do my first black club
>no material prepared
>just tell an irl story of eating a pussy post bladder infection
>one beautiful girl in the front just glaring and shaking her head
>everybody else fucking hooping and hollering
Black clubs are pretty fun if you aren't trying to do that *lol im awkward haha umm this is art* that young white comics do WAY too much

I got televised on a 'up and comers' block at my states comedy fest back in the 90s and opened for a regional comic (Australia) for a few hundred bucks in his Queensland 'test the jokes for Vic/NSW' tour.

I'm convinced that 90% of 'a list' comics just create a trained response from their audience though, people pay for a ticket because X is hilarious, therefore pretty much anything mildly amusing they say is hilarious, this is amplified by being surrounded by like minded people and in the mood for comedy. Not acting like i'm some god of comedy, but it's a million times harder at the lower rungs, even with pure gold comedy.

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>>83697872
In fact, yes.

>>83696242
>tfw school camping trip when I was 11
>we all had to preform something in front of all the classes on the trip
>decided to do a stand up routine
>sat down the whole time and talked about Aqua's barbie girl song for some reason as it were popular at the time
>after 5mins at the end I stand up and a shout and now I will begin my comedy routine
>none of the other students get it
>get booed off the stage
>spend the rest of the trip so embarrassed that I trued running away while we were paddling the canoes on the river while another student was in the canoe with me
>tfw end up going in circles crying and later on faked being sick to go home

Fucking end my life someone.

>>83698176
Open mics are vicious. Especially in the bars where NOBODY gives a fuck what you have to say, they're just there to drink with their buddies.
I will say though, top rung comics have easy crowds, but being publicly scrutinized everyday online and fighting to stay relevant can't be easy.

>>83698315
Look man you were a faggot, probably still are a faggot, but total suicide inducing embarrassment is golden comedy material. If you have the balls, go tell that shit story on stage. I can tell you most comics I know got booed after their first month of open mics as adults, definitely not as 11 year olds. You got it out early AND you didn't kill yourself so good job bud

>>83698381

I do wonder if stand up comedy at the lower levels is being bogged down by fairly ordinary people trying to convince themselves they're funny. I've been to some open mics and I kind of get a fad type impression, but I don't know what it was like a decade or more ago.

>>83696242
I actually tried doing standup a few years ago during my junior and senior year in highschool. For a long time I thought the one thing I wanted to do was become a standup comic, so most of my time I spent writing and reviewing material to make that dream happen. My first performance in front of a live audience was at school, and it was terrible. Even though nobody really laughed at my jokes, by the end people where cheering and whistling as if I had grabbed every medal in a decathlon. While this gave me encouragement to keep going, I finally found my match when I stupidly decided to perform at a bar that everyone at my school, my peers and me included, were very familiar with down town.

I wasn't exactly all that nervous, but excited, and I figured people were just excited to hear me on stage. How wrong was I. Nobody laughed, but this time around people were laughing at me. That night destroyed me as a person and I don't think I have ever quite recovered from it. I remember having too much to drink to forget the whole thing at the end of the night and making an even bigger fool of myself.

>>83696242
My exgf is now a successful standup comedian.
I'm scared that she makes jokes about me.

>>83698527
i go to the local open mic in my area every weekend which generally has at least one semi famous/established comedian headlining to draw a crowd and basically make sure there is comedy. some of the people that insist on getting up (and returning) are absolutely not funny, but are so into the scene and the mechanics of comedy they believe it's just a matter of crafting a good joke. it's delivery. i repeat funny stuff i hear all the time and never get laughs. when i'm actually passionate/angry at something, people will laugh at what i'm saying. it's 100% personality/charisma. some of the best acts i've seen down there have stood up and just riffed for 30 minutes while blind drunk about bullshit, but the way the deliver/describe is of course what makes it. i would equate good comedy to good writing, you really have to pull people into the moment.

>>83696242
I make sarcastic or cynical remarks that play off normal situations, doesnt mean I should try standup

>>83698750
lmao are you the lil dicked cuck ex? I love those stories!!

>>83696242
I bought Steve Martin's Masterclass and realized that I have no talent and am completely worthless and that masterclasses are a ripoff and are targeted at neets such as myself.

>>83696242
Standup is hard as fuck. Lots of people can be funny in conversation but very few people can pull off standup.

I tried it once but everyone laughed at me

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What are some recent standup specials worth watching?

>>83701785
amy schumer

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>>83696242
Who is your biggest comedy inspiration?

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>>83702093
>1st row, 2nd from bottom

I will never ever understand the appeal of stand up comedians. I just can't laugh at some dude or chick I don't know, just talking about stuff. There's no context.

>>83702093
none of them

>>83702158
you're just autistic is all

>>83702144
1st column, 2nd from the bottom, you mean.

>>83702241
I'm not the one getting triggered because "they dont like what I like"

>>83700611
>I make sarcastic or cynical remarks that play off normal situations, doesnt mean I should try standup
are you literally me? My close friends and family usually think it's funny because they know I'm joking but sometimes I'll say something sarcastically around people I don't know super well and they don't pick up on the sarcasm and think I'm some sort of lunatic.

>>83702158
was it autism?

>>83702444
>so what's the deal with vomit? :D
>audience roars into laughter

>>83702368

That's literally what you're doing, only extrapolated to a societal level.

99% of people enjoy some brand of stand up comedy on some level, and not only do you not, you purport to physically be incapable of understanding why anyone would enjoy such a medium. The remaining 1% are autists such as yourself.

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>>83702472
>he doesn't think vomit is weird af and immediately start laughing
>the sound of human laughter gives him no merriment

Yep, it was autism.

>>83702317
yeah that's the one

>>83697041
ohh god ive never seen a cringe vid that actually makes me hurt

Im good at quick quips but not with actually writing jokes

>>83702093
Norm. Only comedian who can make things that aren't even funny hilarious, such that your material really doesn't matter.

Also Lenny Bruce is a detestable kike who birthed every unfunny politically rambling hack. Thanks to him we can clap at jokes we agree with instead of laughing at jokes that are funny.

>>83701135
>Steve Martin's Masterclass

$120 CDN, 25 video lessons, I'd like to watch one of the full video segments before committing to purchase the whole lot.

Also, one of the best parts of local open mics is seeing people shit the bed, abandon jokes halfway through and completely fizzle out two minutes into their act. And yes you can see the horribly unfunny female comedians immediately being supported by the male comedians as they get off stage. The dudes are all deep quirky thinkers and the women are all lol-slut-bitchy types.

>>83704174
I've never got Lenny Bruce, and I've tried. Maybe you had to be there.

>>83704174
>Only comedian who can make things that aren't even funny hilarious, such that your material really doesn't matter.
norm sucks, don't know where that recent obsession around his lame ass jokes came about, but he's mostly terrible

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>>83698770
>it's 100% personality/charisma
>i would equate good comedy to good writing
>>83704174
>Thanks to him we can clap at jokes we agree with instead of laughing at jokes that are funny.
Same dynamic with musical comedy where people applaud poor quips as funny because musical skill is demonstrated in tandem.

Do those people look down on laughing at comedy that is goofy or slapstick because it isn't based on high politics or demonstrated skill? Fuck!

>>83702472
No one laughs before the punch line spergboy

>>83702093
I like me some Stanhope

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sLE69z86emM

>>83696242
Not yet but I'm writing some jokes. Wish me luck.

I wrote a stand up script. It's about 11 minutes long and terrible. I'm never going to try.

>>83704174
>hitler's dog
how can people take these 'comedians' seriously, how much of a worn out joke is anything concerning hitler(bill burr's last special had a bit about hitler too, was equally as bad)? I have nothing against a good ww2 joke, but it better be good, jesus fucking christ.

>>83704770
>11 minutes
where were you hypothetically planning to do that? open mics tend to be way shorter

>>83704980
>open mics tend to be way shorter

oh fugg how short are they

>>83704174
>Also Lenny Bruce is a detestable kike who birthed every unfunny politically rambling hack. Thanks to him we can clap at jokes we agree with instead of laughing at jokes that are funny.
have you seen norm's recent interview on the tonight show? he 100% just does that, talk about some bs and the audience laughs for no reason.

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>>83704426
Is that from Steve's memoir? I got the audiobook version in an Audible free trial. Great listen.

>>83705222
Rambling about comedy on a podcast isn't even in the same ballpark as plainly stating political opinions during standup.

>>83704980
I wasn't. I thought it would be fun to try to write jokes down.

funny how?

>>83705204
depends, look it up, 5 minutes is about what I've seen at some venues, depends totally where you're going though

>>83705408
it's not a podcast, you fucking retard and he actually repeats 'jokes' from his special. which is incredibly lame and unfunny, but hey, have fun liking his garbage.

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>they laughed when he said his dream was to be a stand-up comedian
>well, nobody's laughing now!

>>83705516
Wait, you don't think Norms late show appearances are funny? We're done here. Of all the people to haye irrationally you've chosen very poorly.

>>83705596
>Wait, you don't think Norms late show appearances are funny
he word for word repeats his jokes from his special, you brain dead moron, this means his special is also bad, dumbass

>>83696242
I'm literally the least funny person I've ever met. I'm a boring cunt

>>83697041
this is one of those things that's so unfunny it becomes hilarious

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>>83697041
Jesus Christ.

>>83705698
just talk about unfunny things in a retarded slow manner and have shiteaters like this guy>>83705630
worship you endlessly. works for norm.

>>83702158
that's why people usually drink at comedy shows

>>83705755
I may be the least funny person I've ever met, but even I know Norm is funny as shit. Sort yourself out

Yea but I learned I'm best at telling amusing stories rather than actual jokes. I just pretend I'm sitting around with my buddies telling exaggerated stories that actually happened to me and it goes over a lot better than having punch lines.

>>83705204
3-5 min

>>83705818
lmao funniest thing I've ever heard which had something to do with Norm, hell no.

>>83702093

Kaufman gives me inspiration to live.

>>83704770

Nobody, ever, nailed their first attempt at anything.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TnvPt_a7iOQ

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>>83705204
>how short are they
they're so short they need a ladder to blow Peter Dinklage

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>>83708217
>Nobody, ever, nailed their first attempt at anything.
You obviously haven't tried getting into Amy Schumer's pants then.

>>83696242
My buddy tried it once. He said it was the most nerve-racking thing he's ever done. The guy can talk to strangers in a crowd and become friends. He's no stranger to public interaction.

He told me you don't think it'll be a big deal until you're literally on stage with a mic on your face and a hot spotlight hitting you in the eyes and you have a group of people staring up at you waiting for you to humor them.

He froze. I wasn't there but I meant to go but other friends told me he stammered for 8 minutes and the host or whatever he was just excused him.

He told me after that was the most frightened he's ever been and he'd never do it again.

I think it's fuckin terrifying. You see a guy on stage and think you can do it but once you're right there and it's happening it's fight or flight scenario

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>>83705630
>he word for word repeats his jokes from his special, you brain dead moron, this means his special is also bad, dumbass
Comedian bravely brings known material to new contexts and interacts with multiple participants including other comedians and performers.
>The guy is a real jerk.

>>83702093

Out of all of those, I probably quote Eddie Murphy's work the most. Almost half of the others aren't even that funny

>>83697952
amy who?

>>83696242
>Didn't all your friends in highschool tell you you were funny?
>ran into one of my old high school teachers the other day
>tells me I should still consider doing standup because I was funny in class
>I cracked jokes and did stupid shit because I hated myself and making people laugh was the only thing that temporarily alleviated my anxiety

I just laughed and told him I'd consider it.

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>>83697041
She got big tiddies doe
I'd laugh if I could see them

>>83698527

Im a comedian and this is true. Open mics doesn't exist with out schluby doofuses who think they have what it takes. So many people do comedy casually, and as a hobby and are mostly in peoples ways. Without them though, open mics dies.

I know people who have been doing the same shitty jokes for years. Like they found something that's passable and kinda works sometimes.....and they don't let go, or experiment. Its sad as fuck.

>>83702158
You may actually want to get checked for aspergers

>>83702093
I only really started liking Bill Cosby after I found out about all the rapes and I got into Cucking culture.
Can you be one of the Greats if you only do stand-up and not sketch comedy or act in movies? Think about it.
Can you be great without a catch phrase or signature look?
Where are Mike Myers and Jim Carrey in that photo? Louie Anderson?