APOLOGIZE

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they clapped when my plane landed safely in america. they'll clap for anything. sometimes I go to bad plays and I see the audience sitting slumped in their seats and obviously disinterested and just hoping the play will end quickly and I stand up and give a standing ovation and like a herd of birds flocking off a sinking ship like rats they will be incapable of not joining me in my ovation because the pressure to not stand up is too great for the weak american's spine to take given that they have strained it under their global obesity rates.

>>83340807

Still upset he trashed your books, Stephenie?

>>83340807
Cannes is in France...

>>83340127
Fuck off Josh

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>>83340127
>2017
>thinking anything coming out of Hollywood is real

>>83340807
>americans clap all the time
>this is somehow relevant at a french film festival

>>83340848
>>83340926

>Walking encyclopedia faggots

Yeah, no one cares where the shitty festival is. We have netflix now and we don't need to fly all the way to the globe theatre in france because it's not 1523. Anyway, your festival is obviously american. American actors, american english. Pathetic frenchwomen probably even serve freedom fries.

>>83340127
Literally everything at cannes gets a standing ovation or horrific boos. It's all about being as obnoxious as possible as a cinema snob.

>>83341087
You tried.

>>83340127
who the fuck claps for 6 minutes straight? it get obnoxious after 5 seconds.

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>>83340807
>Europeans in charge of geography

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>>83341209
>The audience exploded into applause. Every person in the room jumped up and began to wildly clap, as if racing each other to see who could get to their feet the fastest. The applause was all to honor the dictator Joseph Stalin at a 1937 conference of the Communist Party in the Soviet Union.

>But the big question soon became: Who would have the nerve to be the first person to stop clapping in honor of Comrade Stalin? No one had the courage, so the clapping went on…and on…and on.

>“The applause went on—six, seven, eight minutes! They were done for! Their goose was cooked! They couldn’t stop now till they collapsed with heart attacks! At the rear of the hall, which was crowded, they could of course cheat a bit, clap less frequently, less vigorously, not so eagerly…Nine minutes! Ten!…Insanity! To the last man! With make-believe enthusiasm on their faces, looking at each other with faint hope, the district leaders were just going to go on and on applauding till they fell where they stood, till they were carried out of the hall on stretchers.”

>At last, after eleven minutes of non-stop clapping, the director of a paper factory finally decided enough was enough. He stopped clapping and sat down—a miracle!
“To a man, everyone else stopped dead and sat down,” Solzhenitsyn says.

>That same night, the director of the paper factory was arrested and sent to prison for ten years. Authorities came up with some official reason for his sentence, but during his interrogation, he was told: “Don’t ever be the first to stop applauding!”

So this movie was almost as good as not going to jail for ten years.

>>83341087
I'm gonna bind you in wooden stocks in public and torture your bare naked feet by tickling them mercilessly for hours you dumb faggot. While you're screaming and begging you'll be regretting ever having made such retarded posts and being such a little bitch boy, while everyone laughs at you squealing and squirming as your helpless little toes and arches get what they deserve

>>83340807
>cannes
>american
k