Bill Burr is the best stand up comedian alive, today.

>tfw you get so deep into comedy your life becomes a joke and you are the punchline

>>83176428
nice argument
NOT

Too bad nia put him in a wheelchair

KILL THE DOG, BILL.

>>83176563
the lovely nia everybody

CUT THAT FUCKING MUTS NECK

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>>83176428
>>tfw you get so deep into comedy your life becomes a joke and you are the punchline

>>83176578
>>83176621
>>83176628
>>83176630
HAHAHAHA!!!
Upvoted my good sirs!
Now fuck off

>>83176770
>You can't speak bad about a person

Fuck off shill. If you don't want to be criticised don't tell the world that your wife beats you and you don't care and that she made you kill your dog.

>>83176823
This isnt a thread about Burr's personal life, its about his comedic ability and career you fucking stillborn.

>>83176770
GET BACK IN THE KITCHEN NIQUH
DEM BABYS BOTTLES WONT CLEAN DEY SELVES NIQUH
POLISH MY HEAD NIQUH

>>83176823
>If you don't want to be criticised

You're not criticising anything though, you're shitposting in caps. Also the person you're replying to isn't actually Bill Burr. Also you might be insane.

>>83176895
His fucking personal life that he broadcasts in his business life; when he podcasts about his life he makes his personal life his business. They're not divisible. He is a faggot.

>>83176955

What the fuck is wrong with you?

>>83176955
>His fucking personal life that he broadcasts in his business life

Read that back again and ask yourself if that makes any sense at all

>>83176984
>bidf

>>83176984
I don't support domestic violence, nor do I celebrate those who dismiss it as OK.

Why do you want husband and wives to die by their partners hand by normalizing domestic violence?

Sebastian Maniscalco.

>>83177031
>I don't support domestic violence

Strange, you obviously weren't beaten enough as a child

I love him but his last special was trash. A gorilla joke based on a story that happened back in 1984? Really?

F is for Family is good though.

>>83177077
good comeback cunt. i hope everyone in your family suffers by an abusive partner.

>>83177122

take your shitposting back to /b/ kid

>>83177077
>>83176770
>>83176895
You are obviously the only poster in this thread sperging out. You sound like you are 14 and you should go back to Redddit

>>83176414

>smash that pooches head through the base drummer you failed musician

>>83177003
He does sort of make sense in a roundabout way.

Burr uses his private life in his standup, which makes his private life public. Bill invites people calling him a cuck or whatever by publicly disclosing his wife beat him twice.
Steven Wright doesn't joke about his private life in his standup so his private life stays private. I literally know nothing about Wrights life and can only call him a cuck reflexively.

>>83177170

nice meme

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>>83176641
>like Joe's podcast
>oh hey! he's coming through on tour!
>oh wait that's for his """comedy"""

>>83177205
>Bill invites people calling him a cuck or whatever by publicly disclosing his wife beat him twice.

No, that doesn't invite nonsensical memeing by 16 year olds who have been on this site less than a month

IF I DONT SEE A BLOODIED COLLAR TOMORROW IM FLOODING THIS WHOLE DAMN HOUSE

>>83177231
Nice job reinforcing my post. You post like a faggot. No wonder you defend spousal abuse when it's the wife abusing the husband.

>>83177205
Precisely

For that cuckold not to understand it, I just felt sorry for him and didnt bother replying

>hurr burr talks about his private life 247 in his professional life but his private life is divisible from his professional life because I arbitrarily decided that

>>83177283

>>83177152

Hey Bill tell the one about how you're a grown ass man who still cries because your dad didn't hug you enough

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S8Ho1WWDECM

Hahaha good one Bill.

>>83176414
bill burr has never been funny at any point in his career

>>83177291
>For that cuckold not to understand it, I just felt sorry for him and didnt bother replying

Oh I understood what you were trying to say. I was just pointing out that you couldn't because you didn't have the mental capacity to communicate in proper English. I'm assuming you're a child or some kind of 3rd worlder, the kind who writes inane youtube comments.

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>>83176414

>>83177380

Nah this is perfectly understandable, I think you're just stupid

>>His fucking personal life that he broadcasts in his business life

>Read that back again and ask yourself if that makes any sense at all

He broadcasts his personal life in his business life is somehow confusing to you? Don't you understand basic English? It's the simplest and shortest sentence to convey the message possible.

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step aside

ITT: Butthurt teenagers who idolized Bill because of his "masculine" attitude, rather than his comedy, and were upset to "discover" through memes and shitposting by their internet friends, that he couldn't be the father figure they so desperately desired after their real dad left them at a young age.

How quickly they turned.

>>83177435
>He broadcasts his personal life in his business life is somehow confusing to you?

Like I just tried to make clear to you, it wasn't confusing, just poorly worded, because he's a child and/or a 3rd world shitskin

>>83177535
SHUT THE FUCK UP NIGGA

WHERES MY FUCKING NEW CAR BITCH?

COME HERE IMMA CUT YOU

>>83177056
this

>>83177622

xD

>>83176414

Standup is a dead format. Conversational comedy in podcasts is the future. Nick Mullen is a shitty standup but his podcast CumTown has made me laugh harder than any comedian.

>>83177535
Hi, Bill. Find your balls yet?

>>83177535
the lovely nia everybody HOLY FUCK STOP HITTING ME JESUS CHRIST

>>83176823
>>You can't speak bad about a person
I thought that was one of the main points you retards had against nia.
>oh no, she is not nice to shitty waiters
boo hoo, you babies.

Bill is a fucking beast tbqh

>inb4 unfunny lame as shit greentext pastas

>>83177746
the lovely nia FUCK MY EYE IM BLIND everybody

>>83177746
Are you retarded? Can you not read? The main points against Nia is that she fucking physically abuses Bill, got his dog killed, forced him to give up his hobby, and generally treats him like shit.
Are you seriously this dense? No one said anything about waiters.

>>83177822
this is not the first thread about nia, you complete fucking moron

NIA PLEASE NO NOT MY PENIS

>>83177205
How is he a cuckold because his wife beats him?
Do you underage memers know the meaning of the words you use?

>>83177822
I thought the dead dog was a meme. Is the logic behind it that he gave it to a kill shelter even though he says he gave it to a friend?

>>83177822
She didn't get his dog killed, and all girls do most of that shit

Most of the nia hate comes from Bill being so likable and complaining about his wife, which literally every man ever does

>>83177865
Well language is fluid and cuckold means a weak man so yes there's plenty of ways to understand why a cuckold is a man who accepts his girlfriend/wife/fiance attacking him.

THE LOVELY NIA HOLY SHIT IF BILL WAS BEATING NIA EVERYONE WOULD BE UP IN ARMS EVERYBODY

>>83177899
>all girls do most of that shit
wew lad, sorry for your abuse

>>83177934
>cuckold means a weak man
No it doesn't.
Kill yourself.

>>83177950
>I'm an alpha, all my girlfriends have been obedient and speak when spoken to, never talk back, and I don't adjust my life whatsoever for anyone

Funny how I only ever hear about these on 4chan

>>83177934
>cuckold means a weak man

Well that's wrong but, you know, keep attempting to be part of the internet club.

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>>83177934
>cuckold means a weak man

>>83177988
no they just never repeatedly BEAT ME you beta fag

>>83177988
>If you let your girl hit you, you win

>>83177950

you honestly sound like some kid with a bitch mother

what's wrong, did she tell you to get a job and move out again?

>>83177424
This along with Dylan Moran and Steve Hughes. Bill Burr didn't have to apologize about Meryl Streep. Comedians need a fucking spine.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wgQMb53B9m0

hahah tell it again bill... fucking women... theyre always punching us in the head and shit... but us men, us alphas anywhere, we just suck it up... hahah fucking bill

>>83177963
>>83177997
>>83178017
>t. cuckolds
"n-n-no, Im just beta technically not a c-c-c-cuck!"
yes
yes you are

>>83176414
Louis CK, Sebastian Maniscalco and Neal Brennan are all funnier though, and thats just off the top of my head

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>>83178026

>Hey Faggots,

>My name is John, and I hate every single one of you. All of you are fat, retarded, no-lifes who spend every second of their day looking at stupid ass pictures. You are everything bad in the world. Honestly, have any of you ever gotten any pussy? I mean, I guess it's fun making fun of people because of your own insecurities, but you all take to a whole new level. This is even worse than jerking off to pictures on facebook.

>Don't be a stranger. Just hit me with your best shot. I'm pretty much perfect. I was captain of the football team, and starter on my basketball team. What sports do you play, other than "jack off to naked drawn Japanese people"? I also get straight A's, and have a banging hot girlfriend (She just blew me; Shit was SO cash). You are all faggots who should just kill yourselves. Thanks for listening.

>Pic Related: It's me and my bitch

>>83177988
>heh-heh, it's not like I wanted my dog or anything
>who needs hobbies when you have a girl as good as her?
>I deserved to be hit, I was way out of line!

>>83178046
haha all mothers do that shit tho

Bill Burr is one of the worst fucking comedians since louis ck

>>83178101
thanks for the 2008 throwback anon

>>83178132

But Louis CK is a good comedian

>>83178111
Its perfectly acceptable for your girl to hit you goyim

Do not ever consider your safety or the safety of your children and pets around a violent person goyim

There's no way a violent person will ever hurt you goyim

>>83178101
how many times have you been beaten anon?
there are hotlines for that, no shame in asking for help

stanhope, norm, and dave attell are my trifecta.

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>>83178073
Not to shill norm too hard but you know...

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Literally no competition
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xU0KUibvTmU

>>83177279
Why does nonsensical memeing need an invitation?

>>83178095
>Sebastian Maniscalco
DUDE ITALIANS LMAO

>>83178299
he has his moments but his jokes are kind of hit and miss

>he had an argument with his gf
>WHAT A KEK!!!

>>83177963

how fucking new are you? The exact meaning of "cuck" got thrown out the window when cuck posting involving Louis CK became a thing.

>>83177671
If you cant get up there and do a stand up you arent a comedian.

>>83177056
>see Sebastian Maniscalco at airport
>walk in front of him nearby
>start scratching at my ass furiously
>turn toward him and see him looking
>sniff my fingers deeply
>make eye contact and point at him
>say "Gotcha Bro!"
>laugh deeply with profound joy
>realize it isn't him

>>83178547
>when i get into arguments with my wife I punch her

sounds about right beta. learn to use your words or control yourself.

>>83177524

post anything done by him that qualifies as even remotely funny

he is just awkward
if you find this funny, kys

*smacks lips profusely* SO HOL UP HOL UP *hits bill* SO U BE SAYIN *drops baby* SO HOL UP U BE SAYIN *kills dog* AYYYOOOO SO U BE SAYIN *screams* U BE SAYIN *sells drumset* HOL UP HOL UP *clears dvr* SO U BE SAYIN *posts on instagram* HOL UP SO U BE SAYIN *whines on podcast* WE WUZ THE LOVELY NIA N SHEEEIT

>>83178671
>The exact meaning of "cuck" got thrown out the window
No it didn't, a bunch of autists on 4chan don't get to change the meaning of a word.
All that happens is that a bunch of (mostly underage) retards go around using a word incorrectly.

>>83177988

I'm not an alpha, but my relationship is like this, simply because my gf likes me more. If you have the upper hand you don't have to put up with shit.

The only thing she does that bugs me is talk too much, but I don't have the heart to tell her to shut up just because I'd prefer silence.

>>83178907
>a bunch of 4chan autists don't get to change the meaning of words
>that's reserved for faggots and niggers

>>83178926
Listen to "music" with headphones. Get some good noise cancelling ones.
Or talk about something that's out of their depth. God help you if they actually know anything about the topic, but since you've been with her a while you'll know what she knows.

>>83178907

welcome to fucking 4chan, reddit

>>83176823
>you can't speak bad about a person

>speak bad

SPEAK BAD

>>83177310
Shut the fuck up you embarrassing mongoloid.

>>83179024

Well it's kinda back and forth, she'll say something that does interest me buried in a pile of I don't care.

So I usually just give half-assed answers or noises. Until I hear something worth replying to with full sentences.

>>83179137
Microsoft Word thanks you for your service.

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>>83178842
>tfw Reddit is to dumb for Norm but won't leave /tv/

>>83177535
Nah

Just sad that his angle for comedy is entirely fabricated and that he's sold it away to become almost all the things he spoke against.

Most people like people with integrity.

>>83179205
umm didnt that old white man say bad things about hilary and muslims? eekkk... sexist and racist much?

>>83179294

>people say pitbulls are mean...but I think the meanest dogs are the ones they had guarding the concentration camps

>>83178672
t. grandpa

hey everyone bill burr here with the monday morning podcast
>loud moaning and fucking noises can be heard in the background
h-heheh c-can you hear these noises?..uuuuhh t-the lovely nia is watching a porn parody as a joke
HEY TURN IT DOWN IN THERE
>an angry nigger replies
SHUT THE FUCK UP WHYT BOI BEFO' AH BEAT YO'ASS
>bill sounds nervous
h-heheh...she's with an old friend, such jokers
>the fucking becomes so loud the voices can be heard clearly at this point
-OH YES FUCK ME TYRONE FUCK MA CHOCOLATE HOLEZ TILL AH BLEED NIGGUUUHH OOOOOHHHHH
OH FUCK YES TAKE IT YOU GODDAMN DIRTY HO TAKE DAT BIG BLACK DICK
-YES! YES TYRONE! FUCK ME LIKE THAT LIL WHYT BOI NEVER EVER COULD
>bill sounds nervous and embarrassed to death
h-h-haha t-theyre playing a joke on me, those bastards
>the nigga is about to climax
-OH YEAH! OH GODDAMN ITS COMING YOU HO MAFFUGIN CUMMIN
NOT IN ME NIGGUH GO AND CUM ON DAT LIL CRACKAZ BALD ROUND PATHETIC FUCKIN HEAD
>rushed steps are heard, the door in bills room opens in a hurry
-OOOHH YEAH OH FUG YEAH TAKE IT LIL GINGER BOI FFFFFUUUUUUUCCCCKKKK
DUDE WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU CUMMING ON MY FUCKING HEAD?? WHAT THE F U C K STOP SHIT SOME GOT IN MY MOUTH GODDAMIT
-ooooh...oooh yeah, ooh fuck, relax lil nigguh s'all ovah now.. u a good lil soldier
>bill can be heard whipping his head and begging the nigger to go
h-h-h-heheh...aaaahhhh...t-the lovely nia and her crazy pranks everyone!

>>83179591
I was about to make a nia hating post but this autism turned me off it. You're so clearly deprived of any positive human contact, please kill yourself before you hurt others.

>>83179627
>whispering
h-hey guys bill burr here with the monday morning podcast uuuhhhh...Y-you might
>stops talking, sounds of him looking around can be heard
you might be wondering uuhh..why im whispering heheh...uuuhhh
>sounds increasingly nervous
heh i-its because the baby is sleeping...uuuhh..and
>suddenly a hellish shriek can be heard in the background
NNNIIIIIIIGGUUUUUUUUUUUUUHHHHHHHHHHHH
oh sweet jeesus nononono I was so careful no god please
>furious fast steps can be heard coming up the stairs
NIGGUH YOU BEST NOT BE DOIN YO GAY LIL PODCASS IN DA ATTIC AGAIN
fuckfuckfuckfuckfuck the lovely nia oh god I need to hide
>bill can be heard going through stuff frantically trying to hide
>door busts down
>nia can be heard furiously breathing
WHERE ARE YOU LIL NIGGUH
>starts shuffling through stuff throwing shit around laughing and sniffing
I CAN SMELL YO PASTY LIL WHYT ASS YOU KNOW SMELLZ LIKE WET DOG
>throws some boxes to the side
THERE'S MUH LIL TERRIFIED PIECE O' ASS
NO NIA PLEASE NIANIA D-D-DONT PL-
>podcast goes offline

>>83179627
So instead you contributed nothing. Thanks faggot

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Heheh, soo..women huh? hahah...women..theyre, theyre..theyre just crazy y'know?
The other day for example, I was at the grocery st-

>Nia storms the stage in her robe without wearing her wig and furiously starts beating the shit out of bill

YOU DIN DO THE DISHES NIQUH
IM HOME ALONE ALL DAY WITCH'O FUCKIN BABY AN IM BORED NIQUH
YO' JOKES PANDER TO PROBLEMATIC SCUMBAGS NIQUH
CHECK YO' WHITE PRIVILEGE NIQUH

*spits out a mouthful of blood*
>the lovely Nia everyone

>>83179627
>I was about to make a nia hating post but this autism turned me off it.

Nobodies buying it Nia. Fuck off.

>>83179647
every fucking time

>>83179792
Aye, Nia is a cunt

Bill burr is a faggot. I'm ashamed to admit I paid to see him in LA on new years one time.

Fucking faggot.

"As I write these lines, I fear I may succumb to madness. I have tried to avoid grappling with my own sanity through distractions like the Monday Morning Podcast, and One Punch Man. But it is all for naught. The negress appeared before me again, screeching of the evils she would inflict upon me...the evils she would make ME inflict upon others....Lord forgive me. My beloved dog, forgive my sins upon you. Know that while it was my hand that did the deed, with was the eldritch abomination with skin like mud that controlled my heart.

I can hear it's horrid offspring. Black as night...It screeches in the distant. I will not heed it. I must not. I must stay hidden.

I feel a presence behind me. I hear the sanity-destroying voice, bellowing," NIQUH YO PASTY ASS UP HERE AGAIN! GET YO WHITE ASS DOWNSTAIRS AND GO MAKE ME SOME DINNUH, FO I KICK YOU ASS, CRACKA!"

I don't even need to turn to see the horror that awaits behind me... Soon..it will all be over...I shall welcome darkness' sweet embrace.

-H.P Burrcraft

>>83181543
fucking kek

>Hey whats going on its bill burr and this is the monday morning podcast. Coming out to all you laddddies out there you love to beat your husbandss ahh hahaha go fuck yourselves. Whats wrong with white men am I right fellas? Why are weo so weak and pathetic? We all let our women lay hands on us dont we? Come on, dont be ashamed, you can admit it, I can admit me, we all, as a collective group, are weak pathetic faggot bitches who let our women hit us... cause we're scum, we ruled the earth for 2000 years and now it's our turn to lie down and take it, and we deserve it, we fucking deserve it. You know what I enjoy getting hit by my wife, I do, you know what? Cause I'm a fucking evil person. I have white skin. My parents are white. It's fucking embarrassing. I wish I could've killed myself but that's taking the easy way out isn't oh Billy Boy? I deserve to suffer, so I'm going to live out my days in misery. I drink from the toilet, I eat from the garbage can, and I love it.

Honestly this weeks episode was kinda confronting....